- Tell him. Please tell him. - Tell him.
- 跟他讲 跟他讲 - 跟他讲啦
- Shut up. - Tell me what?
- 闭嘴 - 跟我讲什么？
- You won't even look at him. - Oh, come on, tell me.
- 你连看他都不敢 - 跟我说啦 拜托
I could use another reason why women won't look at me.
All right, all right, all right.
好啦 好啦 好啦
Last night, I had a dream...
...that, um, you and I were, uh...
Doing it on this table.
- Wow. - Excellent dream score.
- 喔 - 漂亮的梦中上垒
Why...? Why would you dream that?
More importantly, was I any good?
Well, you were pretty damned good. Ha, ha.
Interesting, because in my dreams, I'm surprisingly inadequate.
有意思 因为在我的梦中 我笨拙到让人吃惊
Well, last night, you seemed to know your way around the table.
I love it when we share.
I can't believe you two had sex in her dream.
I'm sorry. It was a one-time thing.
I was very drunk, and it was someone else's subconscious.
- Hello, Rachel. - Ugh.
- 嘿 瑞秋 - 嗯
Ooh. Oh, give me. Can you see me operating a drill press?
I don't know. What are you wearing?
Pheebs, why would you want to operate a drill press?
Just for some short-term work.
You know, till I get back some of my massage clients.
No. Nothing like that.
I'm just such a dummy.
I taught this "Massage Yourself at Home" workshop.
我在一个 "在家自我按摩" 讲座教他们
Hey, hey, Chan, she could work for you.
嘿 钱德 她可以去你那里工作
Thanks, Joey. That's a good idea.
谢谢你 乔伊 那真是个好主意
What? I could. I could do it. What is it?
什么？我可以啊 真的 要做什么？
Well, my secretary's gonna be out.
She's having one of her boobs reduced.
It's a whole big boob story.
I could be a secretary.
Well, I don't know if it's your kind of thing...
嗯 难说 不知道你会不会喜欢…
...because, uh, it involves a lot of being normal...
...ahem, for a large portion of the day.
- What are you playing with? - It's my new beeper.
- 你在玩什么？ - 我的哔哔机
Why the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for?
Is it, like, for dinosaur emergencies?
"Help, come quick! They're still extinct!"
"救命 快来 他们仍然处于绝种状态"
No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am.
不是 卡萝准备要生产时用的 她什么时候都找得到我
All she has to do is dial 55-JIMBO.
A cool phone number and a possible name for the kid.
- I'll see you guys later. - Off to see young Ethan?
- 我们晚点再见 - 要去跟小伊森约会了吗？
How young is young Ethan? Young?
- Okay, he's a senior in college. - College?
- 好吧 他读大学四年级 - 大学？
And this man-child has no problem with how old you are?
It's not even an issue...
...because I told him I was 22.
- What? - What?
- 什么？ - 什么？
- Oh, I can't pass for 22? - Well, maybe 25, 26.
- 怎么 说我22岁没人相信吗？ - 25 26还有可能
- I am 26. - There you go.
- 我26岁 - 看吧
Can you hear that?
That'll stop when you pick up the phone.
- Okay. Ooh, I'm on. - Okay.
- 好 开始了 - 好吧
Mr. Bing's office.
No, I'm sorry, he's in a meeting right now.
I'm not in a meeting. I'm right...
Will he know what this is in reference to?
And he has your number?
All right, I'll see that he gets the message. Bye-bye.
好 我一定会转达留言 再见
- What? - Ross says hi.
- 什么？ - 罗斯打来打招呼
This is so fun. All right, what do we do now?
好好玩哦 好 现在我们要做什么？
Well, now I actually have to get to work.
- Okay, I'm gonna be out there. - Okay.
- 好 我就在外面 - 好
- All right. Bye-bye. - Bye-bye.
- 好啦 再见 - 再见
Okay, windows are clean, candles are lit.
好 窗户很干净 蜡烛都点了
Ooh, belt's too tight. Gotta change the belt.
Did I turn the fish? Nope, because I made lasagna.
- Am I out of control? - Just a touch.
- 我是不是完全失控了？ - 一点点
Mon, I don't understand.
I mean, you've been dating this guy since, like, his midterms.
你跟这个男的从… 期中考吧 就开始约会了
I mean, why all of a sudden are you so?
Could tonight be the night?
Look, he's a great guy, and I love being with him, but, you know...
他是个很好的人 我喜欢跟他在一起 但是你也知道…
...things happen when they happen.
You don't plan these things.
- Oh. So did you shave your legs? - Yeah.
- 你刮过腿毛了吗？ - 刮过了
Would you let it go, Ross? It was just a dream.
Oh, oh, oh. Oh, this is it. Oh, my God. It's baby time. Baby time.
来了 天啊 要生了 要生宝宝了
All right, relax, relax, just relax, just relax. Be cool.
别紧张 别紧张 不要紧张 轻松一点
Yeah, hi, I was just beeped.
No, Andre is not here. Third time today.
Heh. No, sir, I do not perform those kind of services.
不 先生 我不提供那样的服务
Services? Oh, services.
Yeah, you want 55-JUMBO.
That's right. "JUMBO" with a U, sir.
没错 先生 有"U"的那个"JUMBO"
Heh. No, you don't want me.
Judging by his number, I'd be a huge disappointment.
Yeah. Alrighty, bye-bye.
对 好的 再见
- Hey, hey. How was the first day? - Hey. Oh.
- 嘿 第一天上班的感觉怎样？ - 嘿
Excellent. Everyone was so, so nice.
See? It pays to know the man who wears my shoes.
- I didn't tell anybody that I knew you. - Why not?
- 我没跟人说我本来就认识你 - 为什么？
Well, because, you know.
They don't like you.
- What? - I thought you knew that.
- 什么？ - 你都不知道吗？
- Who doesn't like me? - Everyone.
- 谁不喜欢我？ - 大家
- What are you talking about? - Don't feel bad.
- 你在说什么？ - 不要难过
You know, they used to like you a lot.
But then you got promoted, and now you're all, like, Mr. Boss-Man.
You know, Mr. Bing. Mr. Bing. Boss-Man Bing.
他们叫你宾先生 宾先生 宾老板
- I can't believe it. - Yeah, yeah. They even do you.
- 真不敢相信 - 他们还模仿你
- They do me? - Yeah.
- 模仿我？ - 对啊
You know, like, um, okay:
"Could that report be any later?"
I don't sound like that.
- Oh, oh. Chandler. - Oh. Yeah, you do.
- 钱德 - 就是那样
"The hills are alive with the sound...
Okay, I don't sound like that. That is so not true.
少来 我说话不是那样子 那不是真的
That is so not... That is so not... That...
那不是… 那不是… 那…
I am telling you, up until I was 9...
...I thought gunpoint was an actual place where crimes happened.
- Ha, ha. How is that possible? - Think about it. It's always on the news.
- 怎么可能？ - 你想想看 新闻不是一直在播
"A man is being held up at Gunpoint."
"Tourists are being terrorized at Gunpoint."
And I just kept thinking, "Why do people continue to go there?"
- I should go. - Okay.
- 我得走了 - 好吧
- Unless... - What?
- 除非… - 什么？
Uh, unless you wanna stay over.
I mean, I'm going to. So...
Yeah, I'd really like that.
Uh, before we get into any staying-over stuff...
...there's something you should know.
Okay. Is this like "I have an early class tomorrow"...
...or "I'm secretly married to a goat"?
Well, it's somewhere in between.
You see, in a strictly technical sense, of course, I'm not, uh...
Well, I mean, I haven't ever, um...
- Ethan? - Yeah?
- 伊森？ - 什么事？
Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days...
...then yes, I am.
那 对 我算是
I, uh... I've kind of been waiting for the right person.
- Really? - Yeah.
- 真的吗？ - 真的
You do know I was talking about you, right?
You keep saying that.
You know, you read about it. You see it in the movies.
Even when you practice it at home, man, oh, man...
就算在家里自己练习过 但是 天啊…
...it is nothing like that.
Um, you told me something that was really difficult for you.
And, um, well, I figure if you can be honest, then I can too.
我想 既然你可以对我说实话 我也可以对你说实话
- Oh, God, don't tell me I did it wrong. - No.
- 天啊 不要告诉我我做错了 - 不是
- No, no, no. - Oh.
- 不是 不是… - 哦
- Nothing wrong about that. - Oh. Ha, ha.
- 完全正确 - 噢…
Um, okay. Here goes.
But I figure, you know, that shouldn't change anything.
I mean, what the hell does it matter how old we are?
...as long as we're telling stuff, uh...
...I have another one for you.
I'm a little younger than I said.
You're not a senior?
Oh, I'm a senior.
What we did was wrong.
Oh, God. I just had sex with someone who wasn't alive during the bicentennial.
天啊 刚刚跟我上床的人 美国两百周年国庆时还不存在
Ethan, focus. How could you not tell me?
伊森 专心一点 你怎么不早点说？
- You never told me how old you were. - That's different.
- 你也没告诉我你多大 - 那不一样
My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states.
- What were you thinking? - I wasn't thinking. I was busy falling...
- 你有没有在用大脑？ - 我没在用大脑 我忙着…
- Don't say it. - ...in love with you.
- 不要说出来 - 爱上你
Well, fall out of it.
You know, you shouldn't even be here. It's a school night.
I'm like those women that you see with shiny guys named Chad.
I'm Joan Collins.
Okay, Andre should be there in about 45 minutes.
Ahem. It's just easier that way.
Oh, come on. You told me about the last dream.
好啦 上次做的梦 你就肯说
Well, why not? Was I doing something particularly saucy?
All right, fine. Um...
Well, you were not the only one there.
Was there, uh, heh...
...anybody else there?
- No. - You sure?
- 没有 - 你确定？
Nobody, uh, handing out mints or anything?
No, it was just the three of us.
So tell me, was it like you and Chandler and then you and me...
那么 是你先跟钱德 然后再你和我…
...or you and me and Chandler?
- You know what? - What?
- 你知道吗？ - 什么？
...when it wasn't even me.
That is so sweet, you guys.
Mon, Ethan called again.
- What? - Ethan called again.
- 干嘛？ - 伊森又打电话来了
- You're not seeing him anymore? - No.
- 你不跟他交往啦？ - 不了
You know, sometimes just things don't work out.
And this has nothing to do with the fact that he needs a note to get out of gym?
I didn't say any... I did not say anything, I swear.
我没说… 我什么都没说 我发誓
Next time you talk to him...
...could you ask him which one the strongest Power Ranger is?
Oh, my life is just so amusing. Heh, heh. Can we drop it now?
哈哈 我的人生真是好笑 大家可以闭嘴了吗？
- Stegosaurus! - Tyrannosaurus!
- 剑龙 - 暴龙
Ooh. Oh, I gotta go.
Whoa. Ooh, head rush. Oh.
One more and then I have to go.
Oh, I got a birthday party with some work people.
- Nobody told me. - No, I know.
- 都没人告诉我 - 对啊 我知道
That's part of the whole, you know, them-not-liking-you extravaganza.
Know what? I don't get this. A month ago, these people were my friends.
Just because I'm in charge, doesn't mean I'm a different person.
Well, then you should come tonight, just hang out with them.
Let them see what a great guy you still are.
- You think I should? - I really do, yeah.
- 你觉得我应该去吗？ - 对啊 真的
- Okay. Okay. - Okay.
- 好 好吧 - 好
Oh, but, um, could we not go together?
I don't wanna be the geek who invited the boss, you know?
I think last night was great.
You know, the karaoke thing? Tracy and I doing "Ebony and lvory"?
- Mm-hm. - Ha, ha.
- 嗯… - 哈
You were great. But they still made fun of you.
- What? - Now you're more like Mr. Caring-Boss.
- 什么？ - 现在你成了关心下属先生
Mr. "I-Wanna-Be-Your-Buddy"- Boss-Man-Bing.
Then I don't get it.
Well, you know what, Chandler? I think you just gotta face it.
You're, like, the guy in the big office, you know?
You're the one that hires them and fires them.
- They still say you're a great boss. - They do?
- 他们还是觉得你是个好上司 - 真的吗？
But they're not your friends anymore.
- But I just want to... - No, but you can't.
- 但是我只想要… - 但是你不行
- But I just want... - Ah-ah.
- 但是我只想要… - 啊哈
Aren't you gonna...?
Oh, Carol and I have a new system.
If she punches in "911," it means she's having a baby.
- Otherwise, I just ignore it. - What about Andre?
- 其他的我都不管了 - 那安德烈怎么办？
This morning he got a call from what I think was our cousin Nathan.
And frankly, it was a little more than I needed to know.
That was gonna be my opener.
Hey, did you guys check out those new hand dryers in the bathroom?
- I thought that was just a rumor. - True story.
- 我以为那只是传闻 - 真的有
All right, look, I gotta tell you something.
I only said that so you'd think I was cute and vulnerable.
I have a wife. I have a job. I'm your congressman.
我有老婆 有工作 是你选区的国会议员
Monica, this is ridiculous. We are great together.
摩妮卡 这太离谱了 我们在一起很快乐
We can talk, we make each other laugh. And the sex. Oh, man.
我们很有话聊 能逗对方笑 性生活 天啊 太美满了
Okay, I have no frame of reference, but I thought that was great.
好 我是没得比较 但是我觉得很棒
- It was. - Then what's the problem?
- 是很棒 - 那么问题在哪里？
Ethan, it's, um...
You're actually gonna throw this away because it's icky?
Look, this isn't easy for me either.
I wish things were different.
If you were a few years older or I was a few years younger...
...or we lived in biblical times...
- ...I could really... - No, don't say it.
- 我就可以… - 不要说出来
- Are your hands still wet? - They're moist.
- 你们手干了吗？ - 还是湿湿的
- Yeah, right? Ahem. - Let's dry them again.
- 对啊 - 我们再去烘一下
Or, like, "Could these margaritas be any stronger?"
还有 "这玛格莉特调酒 可以再烈一点"
- Hey, Chandler. - Hello, Mr. Bing.
- 嘿 钱德 - 你好 宾先生
Loved your Stevie Wonder last night.
Thanks. Listen, about the weekly numbers, I'm gonna need them on my desk...
- Sure. - No problem.
- 当然 - 没问题
You have to give them something, you know?
Okay, that was Gerston, Santos, and who's the guy with the mustache?
好 那是葛斯顿 山多斯 那个有小胡子的是谁？
- Petrie. - Petrie. Right, right, okay.
- 彼崔 - 彼崔 对 对 好
Well, some people are gonna be working...
- Ross? - I'm here.
- 罗斯？ - 我在这里
- Wow. - What?
- 哇 - 怎么了？
Heh. Great. Now I'm having a baby.
- No. I'm having... I'm having a baby! - Oh. Oh!
- 宝宝要… 宝宝要出生了 - 噢…
- Oh, my God. - I'm having a...!
- 天啊 - 宝宝要…
- The phone, the phone! - The phone. I don't have the phone. Aah!
- 电话 电话 - 电话 电话不在我这边
- Ross? - I'm hurt.
- 罗斯？ - 好痛
Monica, let's go. Come on, now, people. Woman in labor.
摩妮卡 快点 动作快 有人要生了
- Hey, Ross, look what I got going here. - Yeah, save it for the cab, okay?
- 嘿 罗斯 你看我会这样 - 车上再说 可以吗？
What are you doing? We're going to a hospital.
What, so I can't look nice? There might be doctors there.
- Joey, get out of the fridge. - All right, all right.
- 乔伊 不要再翻冰箱了 - 好啦 好啦
- What is that? - For the ride.
- 那是什么？ - 车上吃的
- Yeah, like in a cab you... - Save it.
- 是啦 在计程车上… - 待会儿再说
- Okay, hating this. - Monica, come on, now. Let's go.
- 这样很讨厌 - 摩妮卡 快点 我们要走了
Baby coming. God.
I can't believe it. I'm gonna be an aunt.
- Oh, that's... - I'm gonna have a nephew.
- 那真是… - 我快要有侄儿了
Oh, that's nice. Get out.
- Come on. - Let's go, come on.
- 快点 - 我们快走 快点
All right, all right, I'm going, I'm going.
好啦 好啦 在走了 在走了
- Here we go. Here we go. - Rossy. Rossy.
- 冷静 - 罗斯 冷静 乖