- What are you doing here? - Watching you sleep.
- 你在这里做什么？ - 没事 看你睡觉
It makes me feel, um, peaceful.
Ha, ha. Ahem. Please.
I can't sleep now!
Oh, you want me to sing?
That's it. I want you out of the apartment now!
Oh, what are you talking about?
Better roommate than you.
I don't think you're being fair! One night you see me, you get scared.
我觉得你不公平 某天晚上你看到我 觉得很可怕
What about the other nights when you don't see me, huh?
Last night you went and got some water...
and I was nice enough to hide behind the door. What that about, huh?
- I didn't realize that. - Ah.
- 我不知道 - 噢
Okay. You really want me out?
Then I want to hear you say you want me out.
I want to hear it from your lips.
Where'd you hear it before?
Oh, right, all right. You know what? Consider me gone.
I'll be out by the time you get home from work tomorrow.
- Thank you. - I heard that.
- 谢谢 - 我听到了
∮ So no one told you life was gonna be this way ∮
∮ Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A. ∮
上班受罪 口袋空空 爱情变累赘
∮ It's like you're always stuck in second gear ∮
∮ When it hasn't been your day, ∮
∮ your week, your month, or even your year ∮
∮ but I'll be there for you ∮
∮ When the rain starts to pour ∮
∮ I'll be there for you ∮
∮ Like I've been there before ∮
∮ I'll be there for you ∮
∮ 'Cause you're there for me too ∮
- Thanks. - Hey.
- 谢谢 - 嘿
Finally got that time machine working, huh?
This guy was selling them on 8th Avenue and I thought:
- "You know what I don't have?" - A mirror?
- "你知道我没有什么吗？" - 镜子？
Fine, make fun. I think it's jaunty.
好吧 尽量开玩笑 我觉得这个造型蛮潇洒的
Wow! For a guy who's recently lost his job, you're in a good mood.
I'll be all right. I'm not starting from square one.
I was Dr. Drake Ramoray on Days of our Lives.
Huh? That's got to have some kind of cachet.
Chandler gave me word-of-the-day toilet paper.
I'm gonna get some coffee.
Oh! So? Did you read the book?
Oh, my God. It was incredible!
Didn't it, like, totally speak to you?
- Whoa, whoa, what book is this? - Oh.
- 这是什么样的书？ - 噢
Uh! You have to read this book. It's called Be Your Own Wind Keeper.
瑞秋 你一定要看这本书 书名是《做自己的追风人》
Ooh. It's about how women need to become more empowered.
And, oh! But there's wind.
And the wind can make us goddesses.
Do you know who takes our wind? Men. They just take it.
Men just take our wind?
Uh-huh. All the time. Because they are the lightning-bearers.
That sounds kind of cool. It's like The Hobbit.
It is nothing like The Hobbit.
It's like reading about every relationship I've ever had.
Oh, yes. No. Richard would never steal your wind.
- Because he's yummy. - Yes.
- 因为他是帅哥 - 没错
But all the other ones.
Oh, and the part about how they're always drinking...
from our pool of inner power.
But God forbid we should take a sip.
Anybody want a cruller?
This is a typical lightning-bearer thing.
Right there. It's like, um...
"Hello. Who wants one of my phallic-shaped man-cakes?"
Don't worry about it, already! Things happen.
So you're not mad at me for getting fired and everything?
Do I have lipstick on my teeth?
Uh, can we get back to me?
Look, honey. People get fired left and right in this business.
I already got you an audition for Another World.
"Cab Driver Number 2"?
But... But I was Dr. Drake Ramoray!
How can I go from being a neurosurgeon to driving a cab?
Things change. Roll with them.
But this is a two-line part!
It's like taking a step backwards.
I'm not gonna do this.
I'm gonna tell you the same thing I told Al Minza...
and his pyramid of dogs.
Take any job you can get, and don't make on the floor.
Oh, God! I mean, it's just so...
Uh. This is like reading about my own life!
This book could have been called Be Your Own Wind Keeper, Rachel!
这本书应该叫 《做你自己的追风人 瑞秋》
It wouldn't have sold a million copies...
but it would've made a nice gift for you.
- Hey, you guys. - Hey.
- 大家好 - 嘿
Uh, sweetie, we've gotta go.
No! Why do we always have to do everything according to your timetable?
不 为什么我们总得 照你的时间表来做事？
Actually, it's the movie theater that has the timetable.
It's so you don't miss the beginning.
This isn't about the movie theater. This is about you stealing my wind.
不 这跟电影院无关 问题是你抢走我的风了
I can't pull that off, can I?
Excuse me, your wind?
How do you expect me to grow if you won't let me blow?
You know I don't...
have a problem with that.
I just really need to be with myself right now.
- Mm, mm, mm. - Uh, you're right.
- 呃 - 你们说的对
I don't have to apologize.
- What is it? - I don't know.
- 那是什么？ - 我不知道
It's got all this stuff about wind and trees...
and some sacred pool.
I don't really get it. But she's pretty upset about it.
This is why I don't date women who read.
What? What's that?
It's my VISA bill.
Envelope one of two.
- That can't be good. - Open it, open it.
- 这不会是好事 - 快打开
- Oh, my God! - Whoa!
- 天啊 - 哇
Look at this! How did I spend so much money?
Uh, that's just the minimum amount. That's your total.
乔伊 那是最低应缴额度 总额在那边
Whoa, whoa. Thirty-five hundred dollars at "Porcelain Safari"?
The guy said they suited me. He spoke with an accent. I was confused.
店员说它们很适合我 他说起话来有口音 我很困惑
I don't know what to do!
You can start by driving a cab on Another World.
- What? - That audition?
- 什么？ - 那个试镜机会？
That's a two-line part!
Joey, you owe $1100 at "I Love Lucite."
- So what? - So suck it up, man.
- 那又怎么样？ - 接受吧
It's a job. It's money.
I don't need you getting judgmental and condescending and pedantic.
- Toilet paper? - Yeah.
- 来自卫生纸？ - 对
I'm not being any of those things. I'm being realistic.
- You're supposed to be my friend! - I am your friend.
- 不必了 你应该是我的朋友 - 我是你的朋友
Then tell me things like, "You'll be fine."
And "Something big's gonna come along. I know it!"
But I don't know it.
What I do know is you owe $2300 at "Isn't It Chromantic?"
I'm aware of what I owe.
Then get some sense. It took you 10 years to get that job.
- How long till you get another? - I don't want to hear this!
- 下份工作又得等多久呢？ - 我不想听
Well, don't "just say"!
Oh. Maybe I should just go.
Just think about it.
I don't need to think about it!
I was Dr. Drake Ramoray!
Big things are gonna happen! You'll see!
- Hey, pal. - Oh, God!
- 嘿 朋友 - 噢 天呐
What are you still doing here?
Uh, just some basic dehydrating of fruits and vegetables.
Man alive, this thing's fantastic!
Aren't you forgetting anything?
Oh, yeah. I got us a new goldfish.
He's feistier than the last one.
Maybe because the last one was made by Pepperidge Farm.
Eddie, isn't there something else you're supposed to be doing now?
Not unless it's got something to do with dehydrating.
Because right now, I'm a dehydrating maniac!
I thought we had a deal.
- I thought by the time I got... - Uh, uh.
- 我以为我回来时… - 呃
You know what that is?
Your last roommate's kidney?
That's a tomato. Ha, ha.
This one definitely goes in the display.
It's in the display.
Hey, Gunther. Let me get a, uh, lemonade to go.
Ahh, it's career stuff.
They killed off my character on the show.
Oh, that's too bad. How'd they do it?
I fell down an elevator shaft.
I was buried in an avalanche.
I used to be Brice on All My Children.
Why must everybody watch me sleep?
There'll be no more watching me sleep! No more...
- watching! - I...
- 再看了 - 我…
I got some great stuff to dehydrate. Grapes, apricots.
我帮一些东西做脱水 葡萄 杏桃
I thought it'd be cool to see what happens with these water balloons.
Get out. Get out, get out, get out!
- What? - You! Move out!
- 什么？ - 你给我搬出去
Take your fruit! Your stupid small fruit and get out!
You want me to move out? Uh...
Ooh! Ha, ha. I gotta tell you, that's kind of out of the blue, don't you think?
This is not out of the blue!
This is smack-dab in the middle of the blue!
Relax! Take it easy, buddy!
You don't have to tell me twice.
God, I mean, someone will be by for my stuff.
If you think I'm leaving you alone with my fish, you're insane!
You want some help?
No help required, chico!
All the way to the airport, huh? You know, that's over 30 miles.
That's gonna cost you about so bucks.
Excuse me, that's "50" bucks.
- What? - Fifty dollars.
- 什么？ - 五十块
Oh. You know what it is? It's smudgy because they're fax pages.
When I was on Days ofour Lives as Dr. Drake Ramoray...
they'd send over the whole script on real paper.
Ha, ha. That's great.
If you wanted to expand this scene, like have the cab crash...
I could attend to the victims...
because I have a background in medical acting.
Okay, listen, thanks for coming in.
好吧 听我说 谢谢你来试镜
No. Uh, don't thank me for coming in. Uh, at least let me finish.
不 别谢我来试镜 至少让我演完
Uh, we could take the expressway...
but, uh, this time of day you're better off taking the budge.
You were going for bridge there, weren't you?
I'll have a good day.
Okay, question number 28.
"Have you ever allowed a lightning-bearer to take your wind?"
I would have to say no.
And I would have to say, "Pah, ha."
Do you not remember the puppet guy?
You totally let him wash his feet in the pool of your inner power.
And his puppet too!
Well, at least I didn't let some guy...
into the forest of my righteous truth on the first date!
Okay, okay, moving on, moving on. Next question.
好吧 继续 下一题
"Have you ever betrayed another goddess...
for a lightning-bearer?" Okay, number 30.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Let's go back to 29.
Ahem. Not to my recollection.
Danny Arshack, ninth grade.
You know the bottle was pointing at me.
Only because you took up half the circle!
Listen to you two. It's so sad.
Looks like I'll be going to the goddess meetings alone.
Not when they find out you slept with Jason...
an hour after he broke up with Monica.
- You are such a leaf blower! - Oh!
- 你是个抓耙子 - 噢
Oh, hey, uh, be careful with that 3-D Last Supper.
Judas is a little loose.
Oh, my God! What's going on?
They're taking all my stuff back. I guess you were right.
No, I wasn't right. That's what I came here to tell you.
不 我错了 所以我来找你
I was totally hung up on my own stuff the other day.
No, listen. I need the whole security thing, you know?
不 听着 我非常需要安全感
To know where my next paycheck is coming from. But you don't need that.
And that's amazing to me.
I could never do what you do.
- Thanks. - You hold out for something bigger.
- 谢谢 - 你有伟大梦想
I can't tell you how much respect I have...
for you not going to that stupid audition.
- I went. - Great! How did it go?
- 我去了 - 太棒了 结果如何？
- I didn't get it. - Good for you!
- 我没有被录取 - 太好了
You're living the dream!
- Huh? - Ha, ha.
- 呵？ - 哈哈
- Oh, not my parrot. - What?
- 别拿走我的鹦鹉 - 什么？
I can't watch this.
Hey, hold on, hold on.
How much for the, uh? How much to save the bird?
- Twelve hundred. - Dollars?
－一千两百块 - 美金？
You spent $1200 on a plastic bird?
Uh, it was an impulse buy. Near the register.
Go ahead with the bird.
- Do you have anything for around $200? - Uh.
- 有什么东西是两百块左右？ - 呃
My gift to you, man.
I really liked that bird, though.
- But the dog! Oh! - Yeah. Right?
- 不过狗也可以 - 对
Here are your cakes.
We didn't order cake.
No, I know. Ahem. They're from me.
对 我知道 我请客
You guys, this is not good.
We have enough trouble with guys stealing our wind...
without taking it from each other.
- You're right. - You know?
- 你说的对 - 你知道吗？
I love you goddesses.
I don't ever want to suck your wind again.
- Thank you. So are we good? - Oh. We're good.
- 谢谢 我们没事了吧？ - 我们没事了
- We're good? - Yes.
- 我们没事了吧？ - 对
Okay. Let me take these back. They'll take it out of my paycheck.
好吧 我得把蛋糕收回去 他们会扣我的薪水
Ding-dong, the psycho's gone!
- Are you sure this time? - Yes.
- 这次你确定吗？ - 对
I actually saw him leave.
That guy is holding a human head.
He's holding a human head!
I tore it off a mannequin in the alley behind Macy's. Ha, ha.
There is no alley behind Macy's.
So I got it in the junior miss department. Big diff.
It'll make a hell of a conversation piece at our next cocktail party, huh?
"Our next cocktail party"?
Yeah, you know, we'll put chips in it. We'll make it a chip chick.
对 我们可以把薯片放进去 让它变成薯片小妞
Eddie, do you remember yesterday?
Uh, yes, I think I vaguely recall it.
Ahem. Do you remember talking to me yesterday?
So, what happened?
We took a road trip to Las Vegas!
So on this road trip, uh, did you win any money?
Nah, I crapped out. But Mr. 21 here! He cleans up!
我输光光 但21点先生 他手气可好了
$300! He buys me these new shoes. Sweet, huh?
Uh, see you upstairs. See you, pals!
Is anyone else starting to really like him?
May I help you?
Why doesn't my key work, and what's my stuff doing downstairs?
It's Eddie, you freak! Your roommate.
我是艾迪 变态 我是你的室友
I already have a roommate.
Um, he's lived here for years. I don't know what you're talking about.
No, he moved out and I moved in.
不 他搬出去 我搬进来
Well, I think we'd remember something like that.
I know I would. Ha, ha.
That's, uh, a good point. Um...
I guess I got the wrong apartment.
- I'm terribly sorry. - Hey, no problem.
- 真的很抱歉 - 没关系
Goodbye, you fruit-drying psychopath.
- You want me to help you unpack? - Nah, I'm okay. Oh, and, uh...
- 要我帮你把东西拿出来吗？ - 不用了 我可以的
Just so you know, I'm not moving back in because I have to.
I mean, I do have to, but...
It's just that that place, it wasn't really...
Welcome home, man.
- A little foos? - Absolutely!
- 玩一下足球台？ - 当然
What happened to the foosball?
Are we gonna bring this out every time Ross comes over?
He paid a lot of money for it.
- I'm gonna hold him a different way. - All right.
- 我要转个方向 - 好吧
If you hated it so much, why'd you buy it in the first place?
Well, I had a whole ceramic-zoo thing going over there.
But without the other ones, it looks tacky.
Is he housetrained or will he leave little bathroom tiles all over?