- How did the audition go? - Incredible.
- 乔伊 试镜试得怎么样？ - 超赞的
I met the director. You'll never believe who it was.
I'll give you one hint.
There's just one thing that might be a problem.
See, I had to kiss this guy.
Because he was just so darn cute?
No, part of the audition. I'm up for the part of this guy...
不是 是试镜过程的一部分 我想争取的角色…
who the main guy kisses.
Well, you're an actor. I say you just suck it up and you do it.
Or you just do it.
I did do it. I'm a professional.
- What's the problem? - After the scene...
- 那问题在哪儿？ - 试镜后…
Mr. Beatty comes up to me and he says, "Good actor. Bad kisser."
比提先生过来找我 他说"好演员 吻功很逊"
Can you believe that? Me, not a good kisser.
Mother Teresa, not a good mother. Pfft.
Who cares what that guy thinks?
What does Warren Beatty know about kissing? Heh.
∮ So no one told you life was gonna be this way ∮
∮ Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A. ∮
上班受罪 口袋空空 爱情变累赘
∮ It's like you're always stuck in second gear ∮
∮ When it hasn't been your day, ∮
∮ your week, your month, or even your year ∮
∮ but I'll be there for you ∮
∮ When the rain starts to pour ∮
∮ I'll be there for you ∮
∮ Like I've been there before ∮
∮ I'll be there for you ∮
∮ 'Cause you're there for me too ∮
What did your agent say?
Yep. This kiss thing is definitely a problem.
Mr. Beatty wants to see it again on Monday.
Man, I gotta figure out what I'm doing wrong.
老天爷 我得找出 自己到底哪里做错
Oh, okay. One of you girls come over here and kiss me.
- Forget it. - Yeah, right.
- 休想 - 想得美
Hey, come on. I need your help here.
I'll do it. I've kissed him before. I can do it again.
我来吧 我以前亲过他 我可以再亲一遍
See this, huh? This is a friend.
Oh, wait. I have gum.
Good. Very good. Firm, but tender.
很好 非常好 坚定而温柔
I'd recommend you to a friend.
Then I don't know what the problem is.
Maybe you're not used to kissing men.
Maybe you tensed up a little.
Maybe you need to work on it.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Over my dead body.
And I'll be using his dead body as a shield.
Come out, honey. I'm telling you, you look good.
出来吧 亲爱的 我跟你说 你看起来很美
Tell her she looks good. Tell her she looks good.
Oh, my God! Ha, ha, ha.
I cannot believe I have to walk down the aisle in front of 200 people...
looking like something you drink when you're nauseous.
So don't. I don't see why we have to go to this thing.
It's your ex-fiancé's wedding.
Because I promised Mindy I would.
Yeah, well, you promised Barry you'd marry him.
You guys, I have to go. I'm the maid of honor.
各位 我得走了 我是伴娘
Besides, I need to be in a room again with these people...
and feel good about myself.
Someone's wearing the same clothes they had on last night. Get a little action?
- What's she look like? - We haven't met.
- 她长什么样子？ - 我们没见过面
We stayed up all night talking on the Internet.
I like this girl. I seriously like this girl.
You know how I tend to get a little defended and quippy?
- Get out. - No. Please.
- 哪有 - 根本没有好吗
Well, she called me on it, okay? She said, "Cut it out, get real."
她很直接揭穿我 她说 "别装了 面对现实吧"
What's that like?
It's like this. Me.
Stop it. You're freaking me out.
Yeah. I don't like you this way.
I'll see you guys later.
- Bye, Richard. - Bye-bye.
- 再见 理查 - 再见
Bye, sweetie. I love you.
再见 甜心 我爱你
I think my boyfriend's ever so dreamy.
I wonder what our wedding will be like.
What are you talking about? What wedding?
Come on. You never talk about that?
We're just living in the moment.
It is so nice for once not to get hung up on, "Where is this going?"
- Afraid to ask him? - Could not be more terrified.
- 你怕问他吗？ - 怕得要命
I think you should seriously consider marriage.
Give Rachel another chance to dress like Princess Bubble Yum.
That's probably why babies learn to talk, so they can tell grownups to cut it out.
Hey, I got a question for you.
Just a little thing, no pressure.
Do you ever, uh, think about the future?
Yeah? Am I in it?
Oh, God. You're about to get so lucky.
- Keep talking. - Well...
- 继续说 - 这个嘛…
sometimes I think about selling my practice.
We could move to France.
- Make French toast. - Ooh.
- 做法国吐司 - 噢
we're in France...
and we're making the toast.
Do you see a little bassinet in the corner?
You really need the bassinet?
Well, I just think the baby would keep falling off the dog.
- Do you not see kids in our future? - Oh. Heh.
- 我们的未来里 难道没有小孩吗？ - 噢
I don't wanna be 70 when our kids go off to college...
and our life can finally start.
Well, that's great. We don't need to talk about this now.
真好 其实也不用 现在讨论这种事
Really, I mean this is so, like, way, way, way in the future.
I'm talking hovercrafts and apes taking over the planet. Heh, heh.
Come on, Chandler. I want this part so much.
拜托你 钱德 我真的很想取得这个角色
Just one kiss. I won't tell anyone.
Joey, no means no.
I'm sorry, we don't have your sheep.
Aw, Rach, I think you look cute.
- You, I could eat you with a spoon. - Get away from me. I said no.
- 你…看起来好吃极了 - 离我远一点 我都说不要了
Richard buzzed. He's downstairs.
Richard's here? I should run down, say goodbye to him.
- Bye. - Good luck.
- 再见 - 祝你好运
How's your date with your cyber-chick going?
Hey, what is all that?
It's a web site. It's the Guggenheim Museum.
and I like funny words.
What does she mean by "H.H."?
It means we're holding hands.
Are you the cutest?
I'm afraid I might just be.
I think it's so great that you're totally into this person...
yet for all you know, she could be 90 years old or have two heads.
It could be a guy.
It's not a guy, all right? I know her.
It could be like a big, giant guy.
Man, I got this close to him, and Monica kneed me in the back.
可恶 就差那么一点点 摩妮卡在后面踹了我一脚
We're wondering if Chandler's girlfriend is a girl.
Ask her how long she's gonna live.
Women live longer than men.
How do you not fall down more?
Okay, ask her what is her method of birth control.
"My husband is sleeping with his secretary."
At least we know she's a woman.
I can't believe she's married.
Oh, man, I'm sorry.
This must be really tough for you.
I read this article that says you're not supposed to throw rice at weddings...
because when pigeons eat rice, it kills them.
That's why you never see pigeons in sushi bars.
- See, we're having fun. - Oh, absolutely.
- 瞧 我们这不是很开心吗 - 当然
I'm not even thinking about that thing that we're not gonna think about.
Hey, there. Are you all right?
Yeah. But in the bathroom, I saw the window I crawled out of at my wedding.
And, God, I just started thinking I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't.
People are gonna be looking at me and judging me and thinking about the last time.
Sweetie, it's gonna be okay. It's a wedding.
亲爱的 不会有事的 这是个婚礼
Generally, people focus on the bride.
I know, you're right.
Alrighty. Everybody look at me. Good.
好了 大家看我 很好
It's time. Bridesmaids and ushers...
是时候了 伴娘 接待…
let's see two lines. Thank you.
I'll see you after the thing.
- Okay. Good luck. - Thank you. Okay.
- 好 祝你好运 - 谢谢
Why didn't you tell me?
What could I do?
Stand up and shout, "Hey, Rachel, your butt is showing!"
站起来大叫 "瑞秋 你屁股露出来了 "
Oh, my God. This is so humiliating.
The only thing that tops that was when I was in eighth grade...
and I had to sing the "Copacabana" in front of the entire school.
Two lines into it, I ran and freaked out.
Oh, my God. My entire life's flashing before my eyes.
Rach, look, I remember that. It wasn't so bad.
瑞秋 我记得那一次 其实也没那么糟
Ross, would you stop! You got me. I'm dating you.
罗斯 得了吧 你已经得到我了 我在跟你约会
Hi, Mr. Weinberg. Hi, Mrs. Weinberg.
嗨 温伯老师 师母
It's wonderful to see you again, my dear.
In fact, I hardly expected to see so much.
事实上 我没想到会看见 这么精彩的事
- You told me you didn't see anything. - I tell you a lot of things.
- 你跟我说你什么也没看见 - 我跟你说过的事多的很
Well, it's wonderful to have you up and about again, dear.
That's the third time someone has said something like that to me today.
- Oh, my God, I'm married! - I know!
- 我的天啊 我结婚了 - 对啊
I'm Mrs. Dr. Barry Hunter, hyphen, Farber.
I am so proud of you, Min.
Oh, Rach. Still here.
At our wedding, they were packing up the chopped liver about now.
Yeah, I love that story.
Ahem. I have a question for you guys.
Why do people keep saying it's good to see me up and about?
After you ran out on your wedding...
Barry's parents told people you were sort of...
- Insane? - From the syphilis.
- 疯了？ - 因为得了梅毒
What were they gonna say? You didn't love me anymore? Come on.
Listen, what are you doing tonight?
I know you're seeing that guy. I was thinking maybe you could bring him...
You gonna answer her? That's the 10th bing-bong message she's sent.
- She wants to know what's wrong. - What's wrong? You're married!
- 她想知道怎么回事 - 怎么回事？你结婚了
That's what's wrong!
- What? - She wants to meet you in person.
- 怎么了？ - 她想跟你碰面
Look, Phoebe, I wanted to meet her in person too.
听着 菲比 我本来也很想跟她碰面
But she's married. She has a husband.
What if the husband is the wrong guy and you are the right guy?
You don't get chances like this all the time.
If you don't meet her, you'll kick yourself when you're 80...
如果你不跟她碰面 到80岁时 你会踢你自己
which is hard to do and that's how you break a hip.
Okay. I'll do it.
Okay, great! Put on your shoes and then march out there and meet her.
太好了 快穿鞋 然后走出去见她
No, wait! You have to take a shower because ew!
不 等等 你要先洗个澡 因为…
No, you have to answer her. Answer her first.
不 你得先回她 先回复她
No, make some coffee because it's too much.
不 去煮点咖啡 因为这太令人紧张了
Tall and tan, and young and lovely
身材高大 棕褐色 年轻可爱
Okay, one more, please. I'm gonna get it in this time.
好 拜托嘛 再一次 这次我一定丢中
Okay, last chance.
Again, I'm sorry.
You know what, maybe I don't need to have children.
Maybe I just think I do because that's what society...
and by that I mean my mom...
has always convinced me that I...
∮ But I want her so badly ∮
I have to have children. I'm sorry, I just do.
我一定要有小孩 很抱歉 但我真的很需要
Yo, could I have your attention?
Best man making a toast here.
I remember when Barry got home from his first date with Rachel.
What? You hired the same band. I can't use the same speech?
Thank you. Thank you very much.
Anyway, I wish you both...
- a wonderful life together. - Aw.
- 幸福美满 - 噢
- What? - No, no, in all seriousness.
- 什么事？ - 不 我是百分之百认真的
Not a lot of women would have the guts to come back here.
And even fewer who'd do it with their asses hanging out.
I'd like to add something to that.
- What are you adding? What are you adding? - It's okay. It's okay.
- 你要加什么话？… - 没关系的…
Most of you don't know me. I'm Rachel's boyfriend...
And I'd just like to say that...
it did take a lot of courage for Rachel to come here tonight.
And just for the record...
she did not run out on Barry because she had syphilis.
What are you doing? I'm serious.
she walked out on Barry is simply that...
she didn't love him.
Which, incidentally, worked out pretty well for me. Heh, heh.
- See you in the parking lot. - No, Rach.
- 停车场见 - 不 瑞秋
And once again, she is out of here!
Okay, who had 9:45? Hm?
You know what, Bar? I'm not gonna leave.
I probably should, but I'm not.
I promised myself I'd make it through at least one of your weddings.
Tonight, all I wanted was to make it through this evening...
with a little bit of grace and dignity.
Well, I guess we can all agree that's not gonna happen.
I guess there's nothing really left to say...
Her name was Lola
She was a showgirl
With yellow feath...
Feathers in her hair
And a dress cut down to there
- Merengue - Merengue
- 默朗格舞 - 默朗格舞
Thank you, honey.
And while she'd like to be a star Tony always tended bar
The hottest spot north of Havana
Music and passion were always In fashion at the Copa
∮ There's a somebody I'm longing... ∮
If kids is what it takes to be with you, then kids it is.
If I have to, I'll do it all again.
I'll do the 4:00 feeding thing.
I'll go to the PTA meetings.
I'll coach the soccer team.
- Really? - Yeah, if I have to.
- 真的吗？ - 如果有必要的话
I don't wanna lose you.
So if I have to do it all again...
You are the most wonderful man.
And if you hadn't have said...
"If I have to," like, 17 times...
then I'd be saying, "Okay, let's do it."
我一定会说 "好 我们生小孩吧"
Oh, my God. I can't believe what I'm getting ready to say.
I wanna have a baby.
But I don't want to have one with someone who doesn't really want to have one.
Where is she? Where is she?
Oh, hey, I have a question.
Chandler. Relax, Chandler. She'll be here.
钱德 放轻松 钱德 她会来的
Oh, oh, oh. That's her.
Yeah, because life's just that kind.
You gotta stop staring at the door...
like a watched pot.
If you keep looking at it, the door's never gonna boil.
I think what you have to do is try not to...
I've been feeling incredibly guilty because I wanna be a good friend.
And damn it, I am a good friend. So shut up and close your eyes.
管他的 我是个好朋友 闭上嘴再闭上你的眼睛
You are a good friend.
The audition was this morning, and I didn't get it.
But that was a hell of a kiss.
Rachel is a very lucky girl.