老友记 第六季 Friends Season 6 第16集: 如果2 The One That Could Have Been

上映日期: 1,999

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧 / 爱情

导演: Kevin Bright

演员: 詹妮弗·安妮斯顿 / 柯特妮·考克斯 / 丽莎·库卓 / 马特·勒布朗 / 马修·派瑞 / 大卫·休默


台词
老友记 第六季 第十六集
So, honey, this, uh...
亲爱的
This threesome thing? Uh, heh.
关于玩3P的事
How are we even gonna find...?
你要去哪里找...
Actually, I'm making a list of women I know who might be into this.
我把可能有兴趣的女人 列了出来
Oh. Wow.
哦 哇
Huh.
嗯哼
Boy.
天哪
Well, someone's been doing their homework.
有人很用功喔
Yeah. Oh, and I know Gail Rosten is in there twice...
是啊 我知道我列了两次盖儿罗斯坦
but she is so...
但是她好...
Oh, I know. Ha, ha.
我知道
You know, just talking about it is getting me kind of...
光是用讲的就让我有点...
- I know. Me too. - Yeah?
- 我也是 - 是吗?
I think Ben's asleep.
我想班已经睡了
Oh, um...
哦 嗯...
You know, I think it'll be better if we just save it.
我觉得我们最好储存精力
Yeah. Heh.
也对
Right. Save it. I can do that.
储存精力 没问题
(贝丝以色列医疗中心)
- Hey, Pheebs. -Hey.
- 嘿 菲比 - 嘿
How's it going?
嘿 还好吗?
I've got to get out of this bed. I'm going crazy here! Crazy!
我得离开这张床 我快疯掉了
Here you go, sweetie.
喝吧 甜
What the hell is this, herbal tea? I hate herbal tea.
这是什么?花草茶?我讨厌花草茶
- I put some honey in it. - Nyeh nyeh honey nyeh nyeh.
- 但是我加了峰蜜 - 不要蜂蜜
- She doesn't know she was fired? - No, the doctors say it may kill her.
- 她还不知道她被开除了对吧? - 对 医生说她会没命
What are you two girls whispering about over there?
你们两个女生在窃窃私语什么?
But I think we should tell her.
不过我觉得应该告诉她
Ugh, I mean, it's just so realistic.
它好逼真喔
I know. Yeah.
就是啊
- His name's Pat. - Pat the dog.
- 他的名字叫拍拍 - 拍拍狗
Oh! Oh! I get it! Ha, ha!
喔...我懂了
Oh, God.
喔 天啊
You, uh? You...
你...
- ready for a refill? - Oh, I probably shouldn't.
- 要续杯了吗? - 哦 我不该再喝了
- Oh. - So I will! Ha.
- 哦 - 所以我要喝
Oh!
Wow.
- It's like it's raining. - Pretty cool, huh?
- 感觉好像下雨喔 - 很酷吧?
But if you think a fish wouldn't get sucked into the mechanism...
要是你以为把鱼扔进去 不会卡进机器里
well, you'd be wrong.
那你就错了
Um, can I use your bathroom?
可以借用洗手间吗?
- It's, uh, right through there. - Okay. Ah.
- 就在那里面 - 好的
You know, I gotta tell you.
我告诉你
If someone told me a week ago...
要是一个星期前有人对我说
that I would be peeing in Joey Tribbiani's apartment...
我会在乔伊崔比亚尼家撒尿...
Life's pretty great, isn't it?
人生真美好对吧?
I hope you're hungry.
希望你饿了
We're starting with oysters.
我们先吃生蚝
You know what they say about oysters, don't you?
你知道生蚝的作用吧?
They have parasites?
它有寄生虫?
No. Ha, ha.
不是
Um, well, some people say that oysters are an aphrodisiac.
有人说生蚝是一种春药
- What people? - People.
- 什么人说的? - 就是人嘛
People say it.
有人说的
Come here.
过来
- So, oysters, huh? - Ha-ha-ha.
- 生蚝是吧? - 哈哈哈
And then we're gonna have a little Middle Eastern couscous.
然后再吃一些中东的库司库司
Something we can eat...
我们可以
with our hands.
用手拿着吃
When we were studying communicable diseases...
有意思 我们学到传染病时...
No, no, no.
不是...
It's sensual.
这样才性感
- Oh. Didn't know. Okay. - Okay.
- 我都不知道 好 - 好
Oh, no!
喔 讨厌
I'm sorry, it's the hospital.
抱歉 医院找我
The food looks great. Save me some?
菜都很棒 帮我留一点?
I can't promise anything.
我可不敢保证
We're really gonna do this, huh?
我们是来真的对吧?
Looks like it.
看样子是
If this is too weird for you, you can still back out...
要是你觉得很怪 我们还是可以随时喊停...
- I got it! - Okay.
- 我来开 - 好
- Susan, hi. - Hey.
- 苏珊 嗨 - 嘿
- Thank you so much for coming. - I wouldn't have missed it for the world.
- 谢谢你的加入 - 我怎么可能错过
I'm Ross, by the way.
我是罗斯
Hello, Ross.
罗斯你好
- I love what you've done with this space. - Thank you so much. Heh.
- 我喜欢你家的布置 - 谢谢你
How hot is this?
好火辣呀
I'm sorry you're here with me instead of Roger.
可惜在这里的是我不是罗杰
Yeah, me too.
就是啊
Well, I could make it seem like he's here.
我可以让你感到他的存在
"Here's some little-known facts about couscous:
关于库司库司的小常识
They didn't add the second 'cous' until 1979."
第二个库司 是1979年才加的
- Stop it! That's not funny! - Okay.
- 别闹了 一点也不好笑 - 好
I'm sorry, okay? It's just...
对不起
tonight was supposed to be, you know, a big deal.
今晚原本应该很重要的
- What was tonight? - You don't want to know what tonight was.
- 今晚要干嘛? - 你不会想知道的
Okay.
好吧
What was tonight?
今晚要干嘛?
Tonight was going to be my first time.
今晚本来是我的初夜
With Roger?
跟罗杰?
Not just with Roger? Oh, my God.
不只是跟罗杰?我的天哪
All right, relax, Mr. I've-Had-Sex-Four-Times!
别激动 只做过四次的先生
Four different women!
是四个不同的女人
I've had sex way more times.
次数就多太多了
How many?
几次?
Nine.
九次
I'm just waiting for the perfect guy.
我只是在等完美的对象
Well, good. Good for you. You really think Roger's the perfect guy?
这样很好啊 你真的觉得罗杰是那个人?
No, but he's not a horrible guy.
不是 但他也不算糟
That's what I tell girls about me.
我都那样自我介绍
Chandler, I'm gonna die a virgin!
钱德 我会死于处女之身
No, you're not. You are sweet and wonderful...
你不会 你很好很棒
and this is gonna happen for you.
你一定会得到经验
Oh, really? When? Do you want to do it with me?
是吗?什么时候?你想跟我做吗?
Okay.
好啊
I was kidding.
我是开玩笑的
So was I.
我也是
Joey.
乔伊
You're such an amazing actor.
你真是个了不起的演员
How do you know where Dr. Drake Ramoray leaves off...
你怎么分辨雷莫瑞医生
and Joey Tribbiani begins?
跟乔伊崔比亚尼的转换?
Well, with Dr. Drake...
雷莫瑞医生有
they always tell me what to say.
现成的台词可说
And with Joey, I pretty much have to make it up on my own.
乔伊就得自己办了
- Wow. - Mm.
- 哇 - 嗯
Tell me something. Whoa!
你告诉我...
- I just fell right off the couch there. - Yeah, you did.
- 我刚刚从沙发上摔下来 - 没错
I'm okay.
我没事
- Here you go. Let me ask you a question. - Whoops. Yeah.
- 坐好 我问你件事 - 好
When was the last time...
上次
someone told you just how beautiful you are?
有人称赞你很美丽是什么时候?
Wow.
I can't feel my hands.
我的手麻了
Come on. Come here.
手给我
- Huh? - Huh.
- 嗯哼? - 嗯哼
- Oh? - Ooh.
- 哦? - 噢
- We can't do this. - No!
- 我们不能这么做 - 没错
- Oyster? - Yeah.
- 吃生蚝? - 好
If... lf! If we did do this, there'd be a lot of pressure on me.
要是我们做了 我压力会很大
Because you've waited a long time, and I wouldn't want to disappoint you.
因为你等了很久 我不想让你失望
But I have nothing to compare it to.
但是我没得比较
So even if you were horrible, how would I know?
就算你很逊 我哪会知道?
I do like that.
这个好耶
It's harder for me. I have four women to compete with.
我还比较累 我得跟另外四个女人比
Well, if it helps, there were only three.
其实只有三个
So it'd just be for tonight?
所以只有今晚对吧?
Absolutely. It would just be one friend helping out another friend.
没错 只是朋友在帮朋友的忙
Stop it. We're not doing this.
别说了 不行
- Let's do it! - No!
- 来做吧 - 不行
- Okay! - Okay!
- 好吧 - 好吧
So, um...
那...
Do you have any, uh, moves?
你有特定的撇步吗?
I have some moves.
我有一些啦
- I have no moves. - Okay.
- 我没有 - 好
Oh, okay, what you doing there?
你在干什么?
- I'm sorry, this is just too weird. - Yeah, forget it.
- 对不起 真的太奇怪了 - 是啊 还是算了
- What if I turn out the lights? - Okay.
- 要是我关灯呢? - 好
Oh, yeah.
- Chandler? - Yeah?
- 钱德? - 怎样?
That's the couch.
那是沙发
Oh, my God!
我的老天爷啊
I know!
就是啊
I'll tell you something.
告诉你
We are gonna do that again!
我们一定要再来一次
- Oh, okay! - Ah!
- 没问题 - 啊
Morning.
早安
- Oh, right. - Yeah.
- 对喔 - 没错
Oh, God.
天哪
Oh, I can't believe Joey Tribbiani heard me throw up.
居然让乔伊崔比亚尼 听到我吐
He actually saw you a little bit too.
其实他也看到了点
No.
不会吧
Oh, God, we... We didn't, uh?
天哪 我们没有...没有...
No. No, no.
没有
Not after seeing that.
看完就没兴致了
God, I'm just a horrible person.
天啊 我真是很糟糕
- Well, why? - Because I'm married.
- 为什么? - 因为我已经结婚了
That's right, I'm a married woman.
没错 我是有夫之妇
I came to a TV star's apartment to have an affair. Ugh!
还跑到一个电视明星家搞外遇
That's ridiculous.
别傻了
I'm not a "star."
我才不是明星
I'm just a regular famous actor.
只是一般的名演员
And I'm a horrible, horrible person.
而我是个很糟糕的人
Rachel, will you stop saying that?
瑞秋 你别再自责了
Hey. Hey, look.
嗨 嗨 听着
Remember on the show when Capri was dying?
你记不记得在节目中 卡普丽临死前
- And she gave me... - The ring from the cave. Yeah.
- 给了我... - 石洞里的戒指 记得
Wow.
Uh, okay, well...
好...
Uh...
嗯...
Oh, my God! They let you keep that stuff?
天哪 你可以留着它?
Sure. As long as they don't find out, you can keep whatever you want.
当然 只要不被发现 想留什么都行
And I want you to have it.
我要把它送给你
- No, I couldn't. - Yes. Yes.
- 不要... - 要
And every time you look at it...
你每次看到它
I want you to remember that you are a good person.
就要想起你是个好人
Now, you had the chance to cheat...
你有机会外遇
and with me.
而且还是跟我
But you didn't. And that's what this ring stands for.
但是你没有 这就是这枚戒指的意义
But I thought that ring stood for Capri's undying love for her brother.
我以为它是代表 卡普丽对哥哥永不止息的爱
- Look, you want the ring or not? - Yeah!
- 你到底要不要? - 我要
Hey, look at you! You're up!
嘿 看看你 你醒了
- All right. - I thought I'd try to take a walk.
- 太好了 - 我想去走一走
You pour me some water. I'll be back soon.
你们帮我倒杯水 我马上回来
Whoa, whoa. You're not gonna call work, are you?
你不是想打公共电话回公司吧
No. I've learned my lesson.
不是 我已经学到教训了
Let's go. Come on. Move it.
快点 动作快
Phoebe, come on!
菲比 快
Shoes, briefcase. Thanks, Lou. Good luck with the gallbladder.
鞋子 公事包 谢了 祝你的胆囊早日康复
Hey, Joe...
乔伊
did you ever have a threesome?
你...你玩过3P吗?
Look, Ross. Carol's great, and I'm sure you're a very attractive man, but...
罗斯 我觉得卡萝很漂亮 我也相信你很有魅力 但是...
No, I...
不 我...
No. The reason I'm asking is that...
不是 我之所以问你是因为...
I sort of had one last night.
我昨晚玩了3P
- You? - Yeah.
- 你? - 对
- Wow. All right. - Yeah.
- 哇 好棒 - 是啊
So? Was it amazing?
漂亮 过瘾吗?
It was, heh...
还...
okay.
还好啦
Just okay? Did you do it right?
只有还好?你的玩法对吗?
Look, it's just, did you ever go to a party and think:
你有没有在参加派对时觉得
"Would anyone really miss me if I weren't here?"
"少了我会有什么差别吗?"
Huh.
嗯哼
But still, Ross.
不过罗斯
Your worst day with two women, pretty much better than any other day.
跟两个女人玩得再难玩 也胜过其他日子
Oh, oh, no, absolutely.
哦 当然
- Yeah. - Yeah.
- 你懂吧? - 那当然
It's just...
只是
my part seemed to be over pretty quickly...
我这个部分很快就结束了
and then there was a lot of waiting around.
然后我就一直等
Oh.
But you got to be with both of them, right?
你两个都有做到吧?
Not really.
没有
Eh, just Carol.
我只有跟卡萝做
- Not the other one? - No, she kept kicking me away.
- 另一个没有? - 没有 她直把我踹开
- You don't want that. - No.
- 那样很讨厌 - 就是啊
Hey, at least you got to see a lot of stuff.
至少你开了眼界
Oh, I saw a lot of stuff.
是大大的开了眼界
- You get a little bored? - A little.
- 你后来有点无聊? - 有点
- Yeah. Made a snack. - Yeah?
- 我弄了点吃的 - 是吗?
- What'd you have? - Just a sandwich.
- 你弄了什么? - 就是三明治
Turkey. A little mustard.
火鸡肉 加一点芥末酱
- Sounds good. - It really was.
- 好像很赞 - 是很赞
- Hey. - Hey.
- 嘿 - 嘿
Let me tell you about this chick I scored with last night.
跟你说 我昨晚跟一个女生到达本垒了
- Oh, no, wait a minute, that was you. - Heh.
- 等等 就是你嘛 - 嗯哼
Hey, check me out. I'm a slut!
你看我 我是个堕落的女人
So you, uh, want to do something tonight?
晚上要不要找事情做?
Oh, I can't. Dr. Roger's coming over again.
不行 罗杰医生又要来了
Oh. Oh, right.
也对
Right. Because you're still seeing him, and, uh, he's a good guy.
因为你还在跟他交往 他人很好
I remember a time...
我记得有一次...
- Are you okay? - Yeah, totally.
- 你还好吧? - 好得很
Totally. Are you?
你呢?
Great. It's so amazing.
棒呆了 真的好神奇
Last time Dr. Roger came over, I was so nervous.
上次罗杰来的时候我好紧张
But after being with you, I'm like, "Can the doctor see me now?"
但是跟你做过之后 我变成 "医生可以看我了吗?"
I'll bet he can.
一定可以
"I don't have an appointment, but I sure could use a physical." Ha, ha.
"我没有预约 但是我需要体检"哈哈
- You sure you're okay? - Don't worry about me, I'll be fine.
- 你真的没事? - 没事 别管我 我很好
Aah!
My God! Barry!
天哪 巴瑞
- You said you'd be away all weekend! - Oh!
- 你说你周末都不在 - 哦
That's right, I'm sorry. I am early!
没错 对不起 我回来早了
Finish, please!
你们请继续
Surprise, look who's back.
惊喜 看看谁回来了
- Hey, Pheebs. - Hey.
- 嘿 菲比 - 嘿
Call security.
通知警卫
Pheebs, uh, didn't you get fired?
菲比 你不是被开除了吗?
Heh, I don't think so.
我可不这么认为
- Phoebe? - Jack! Hey. Ha, ha.
- 菲比? - 杰克 嘿
- What are you doing here? - All better. Back to work.
- 你来干什么? - 我好多了 回来上班
This clown from research told me I was fired.
但这个研究部猪头说我被开除了
He should do his research, huh? Ha-ha-ha.
他应该用功一点
Well, you were fired.
你是被开除了
Nuh-uh.
没有
I told that guy who answered your phone.
我跟帮你接电话的人说了
Oh, okay. I didn't get that message. So this doesn't count.
喔 我没收到留言 所以不算
- Anyway, I'll be in my office. - Ah, heh.
- 我先进办公室了 - 嗯哼
Phoebe, you don't have an office.
菲比 你没有办公室了
All right, I'll work right here.
没关系 我在这里工作
This is good. Next to this plant.
这里很好 旁边有植物
- Phoebe, let's... - You're in my office.
- 菲比 - 你闯入我的办公室了
Look, I've made a lot of cash for this company. I am talking big bucks!
我替这家公司赚了很多钱 而且是大钱
Pesos! Yen! Rubles! You make one little mistake...
比索 日圆 卢布 我才犯了一个小错...
You lost 13 million dollars.
你损失了1千3百万元
So now this is all about money?
原来一切都是为了钱
You know, it's bad enough that... Ow!
我已经够...
Oh, you have got to be kidding.
别闹了吧
- Are you all right? - I'm having another heart attack.
- 你还好吗? - 我心脏病又发作了
- What? - I'm having another heart attack!
- 什么? - 我的心脏病又发作了
Call 911!
叫救护车
Dumb-ass!
猪头
Pheebs, how's it going?
菲比 你好吗?
They fired me, and I'm having a heart attack.
我被开除 心脏病发作
- Well, welcome back. - Yeah.
- 欢迎归队 - 好
- Hi, Ross. - Hi, Rachel.
- 嗨 罗斯 - 嗨 瑞秋
- Is Joey Tribbiani here? - Um, no.
- 乔伊崔比亚尼在吗? - 不在
If you see him, please tell him that I'm looking for him...
如果你见到他 请转告他我在找他
and that this time I am not gonna throw up!
这次我不会吐了
- Are you okay? - Me? I'm great!
- 你还好吗? - 我?我很好
I'm fine! I'm so good.
我很好 我好的不得了
But you know who's not great?
但是你知道谁不好?
Men!
男人
- You're a man, right, Ross? - Yeah.
- 你是男人对吧?罗斯 - 对
- Sit down. - Okay.
- 坐下 - 好
Let me, uh, ask you something.
我问你一件事
Do wedding vows mean squat to you people?
婚誓对你们来说是个屁吗?
Why is it that the second we go out of town...
为什么我们一说要出门
bam, there you are in bed with the neighbor's dog-walker?
砰 你们就跟邻居的 遛狗小妹上床?
We're sorry.
我们很抱歉
No, seriously. Seriously. What has happened to the sanctity of marriage?
我说真的 婚姻的神圣性呢?
- Didn't you spend last night at Joey's? - Oh, what are you, a detective?
- 你昨晚不是跟乔伊在一起? - 你是侦探吗?
I don't know what's going on with you and your husband...
我不知道你和你丈夫怎么了...
and what is hopefully an adult dog-walker.
希望那位遛狗妹已经成年
Look, can I just say, not all men are like that.
但我要说男人并非都那样
- Ugh. - Hey, there are some men...
- 呃 - 有些男人
who'll do whatever to make their marriage work.
愿意尽全力挽回婚姻
There are some men who will stand by and watch...
有些男人愿意退到一边
as their wives engage in what can only be described as a "twosome"...
看老婆跟健身房刚认识的女人
with some woman she barely knows from the gym!
打得火热旁若无人
Who are these men?
这些男人是谁?
Just men. A guy I know.
就是我认识的一个人
Well, you might want to tell him it sounds like his wife...
你可能要告诉他 听起来他的老婆
is gay.
是同性恋
She is not...
她才不是...
She's gay.
她是同性恋
Oh, my God.
天哪
She is so gay!
她好同性恋
I can't believe this.
我真不敢相信
Good day for married people, huh?
已婚者的黄道吉日
I'm sorry your husband cheated on you.
很遗憾你老公不忠
I'm sorry your wife is gay.
很遗憾你老婆是同性恋
- I guess women aren't that great either. - Try telling my wife that.
- 看来女人也没那么好 - 去告诉我老婆啊
- Okay to come in? - Yeah, come in, eat, whatever you want.
- 我可以进来吗? - 进来 吃饭 随你便
Dr. Roger got beeped again.
罗杰医生又被叫走了
Yeah, I know. Guess who beeped him?
我知道 你猜是谁叫走他的?
- What? - I'm the ruptured spleen. Ha, ha!
- 什么? - 我就是那个脾脏破裂患者
- Why would you do that? - Because you shouldn't be with him.
- 你为什么要这样? - 因为你不该和他在起
You should be with me.
你应该和我在一起
- Really? - When you were talking about Roger...
- 是吗? - 听你聊罗杰
that was killing me. Look.
让我好痛苦
Things like last night don't just happen.
昨晚的事不是说要就要的
At least not to me. I mean, with the other two women...
至少对我来说不是 跟另外两个女人在一起时...
in the morning, I couldn't wait to just go hang out with my friends.
到了早上 我巴不得赶快去找朋友
But with you...
但是跟你...
heh, I was, you know, already with a friend.
我就是跟朋友在一起
- Chandler. - You probably don't want to go out with me.
- 钱德 - 你八成不想跟我交往
I make too many jokes, I've never been in a serious relationship...
因为我太爱开玩笑 也没认真谈过感情
and I guess I'm not technically a "doctor."
又不是个"医生"
There was just one woman, wasn't there?
只有一个女人对不对?
No, there were two.
真的 有两个
- Including me? - Oh, yeah.
- 一个是我? - 正是
It only takes two heart attacks To finally make you see
两次心脏病发才终于让你认清
One of them won't do it But the second will set you free
一次死不了 但第二次会让你解脱
Tell all your hate and anger It's time to say goodbye
告诉你的恨意与愤怒 是该道别了
And that is just what I will do
只要我的老板们一死
Soon as those bastards I worked for die
我就会这么做
La, la-la la, la la la la la la La la la, la la la-la-la la
啦啦啦 啦啦啦