- Hey, guys. I got some bad news. - What?
- 有个坏消息 - 什么
That's no way to sell newspapers. Try, "Extra! Extra! Read all about it!"
那不是卖报纸的好方法 试试"快报 快来买喔"
No. Monica's restaurant got a horrible review in the Post.
I didn't want her to see it, so I ran around and bought all the copies I could find.
Man, this is bad. And I've had my share of bad reviews.
I still remember my first good one:
"Everything else in this production of Our Town was simply terrible.
Joey Tribbiani was abysmal."
Oh, my God! Look at all the newspapers.
It must be a good review. Is it great?
But the good news is, no one in a two-block radius will ever know.
- What about the rest of Manhattan? - Yeah, they all know.
- 曼哈顿其他的人呢 - 他们都会知道
- Oh, my God, this is horrible. - I'm sorry.
- 天啊 这太可怕了 - 很遗憾
I'm so humiliated.
But you know what they say, there is no such thing as bad press.
You don't think that, um, "the chef's mahi-mahi was awful-awful" is bad press?
I didn't write it.
- God, is he right? Am I awful? - Oh, no!
- 天啊 他说的对吗 我很逊吗 - 不
Hey, Monica, listen to me, okay?
I'm not saying this because I'm your friend, I say it because it's true.
Your food is abysmal!
# So no one told you life was gonna be this way #
# 没有人告诉你活着有多累 #
# Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A. #
# 上班受罪 口袋空空 爱情变累赘 #
# It's like you're always stuck in second gear #
# 寂寞又潦倒 受气又受累 #
# When it hasn't been your day, #
# 日复一日 年复一年 #
# your week, your month, or even your year #
# 时运不济 活着受罪 #
# but I'll be there for you #
# 你我永不离弃 #
# 'Cause you're there for me too #
# 你我相偎相依 #
- Ross? - What? What?
- 罗斯 - 什么
- I am freaking out! - Are you?
- 我快吓死了 - 是吗
My due date is in one week!
- What are you doing up? - That is seven days.
- 你为什么不睡觉 - 只剩七天
Look, I had a lot of water. Can we do this after...?
No, no, no, no, Ross!
Please, come on. We do not have any big stuff we need.
We don't have a changing table. We do not have a crib.
- We do not have a diaper service. - Funny you should mention diapers.
- 我们甚至没买尿布 - 你现在提起尿布太有趣了
- I'm serious. - Look. There's nothing to worry about.
- 我是认真的 - 没什么好担心的
We have plenty of time. There's a baby furniture store on West 10th.
Tomorrow, we'll go there...
- ...and we'll get everything we need. Okay? - Okay. Thank you. That's great.
- 买我们需要的东西 好吗 - 好吧 谢谢你 太棒了
Wait, where on West 10th? There's a really cute shoe store...
Okay. If, uh... If you're gonna do this...
...then I'm gonna go do that, so...
- Wait, Ross! I'm sorry, one more thing. - Yeah.
- 等一下 罗斯 抱歉 还有一件事 - 对
Um, our situation, you know, um, what we mean to each other...
...and, I mean, we're having this baby together and we live together...
Isn't that...? Isn't that weird?
I'm just kidding. You can go pee. Ha, ha.
Hey, I can't remember. Did we say we were gonna meet here...
-...or at the movie? - At the movies...
- 或是在电影院里碰面 - 我们约好在电影院里碰面 但…
- I'll see you there. - Joey. Now that you're here...?
- 我们到电影院见 - 既然你来了…
Sure, I can hang out till I have to meet you.
- How come you're not going? - I've got a job interview to get ready for.
- 你为什么不去 - 我要去面试一个新工作
- I thought you already have a job. - And people say you don't pay attention.
- 我以为你已经有工作了 - 大家还说你不太关心别人
This is a much better job. It's vice president of the company...
...that does data reconfiguration...
...and statistical factoring and for other companies.
- Wow. How do you know how to do that? - That's what I do now.
- 你怎么知道该怎么做 - 那就是我现在的工作
- Joey? Come taste this. - What is it?
- 乔伊 来试吃一下 - 什么
Remember the guy that gave me a bad review? Well...
...I'm getting my revenge.
No. He teaches a course on food criticism at The New School.
Before we go to the movies, I want to make him try my bouillabaisse again.
Ugh, I can't wait to read the front page tomorrow:
"Restaurant reviewer admits: 'I was wrong about Monica."'
You really do live in your own little world, don't you?
Do you want these delivered, Mr. and Mrs. Geller?
- Oh, no, no, no. No, no. - Heh. No, no.
- 不 - 不
- We're not married. - We are having a baby together...
- 我们没有结婚 - 我们的孩子快出世了…
...but we're not involved.
I mean, uh, we... We were seeing each other a while ago...
...but then we were just friends, and then there was one drunken night...
Or, yes, stranger, we'd like this delivered, please.
对 陌生人 我们需要外送服务
- Why don't you fill out this address card? - Oh, okay.
- 麻烦你填一下住址 - 好的
- I noticed you picked out a lot of dinosaurs. - Oh, yeah.
- 你挑了很多恐龙 - 对
That's one of the reasons why we are not a couple.
I chose those. I'm a paleontologist.
Really? That is so cool.
Oh, don't get too worked up over it. It sounds like he's a doctor, but he's not.
别太夸他 你可能以为他是博士 但事实上不然
Oh, no. I'm fascinated by paleontology.
- Have you read the Walter Alvarez book? - Yeah, heh, I teach it in class.
- 你看过华特·艾瓦瑞兹的书吗 - 它是我的教科书
Oh, my God. Standing at a cash register, I'm holding a credit card, and I'm bored.
我站在收银台 手里拿着信用卡 却觉得很无聊
I love your neighborhood. There's a great gym around the corner from your building.
- That's my gym. - I could tell you work out.
- 那是我的健身房 - 我看得出来你有健身
A paleontologist who works out. You're like Indiana Jones.
I am like Indiana Jones.
Hey! Oh, how did baby shopping go?
It was great! We got everything we needed.
Oh, and Ross almost got something that wasn't on the list.
- What? - We were paying for our stuff...
- 什么 - 我们正在付帐
...and this sales woman just started flirting with him.
Can you believe that?
- Did she know you two weren't married? - Yeah.
- 她知道你们没有结婚吗 - 知道
Oh, my God. Well, the idea... A woman flirting with a single man?
天啊 那… 一个女人在泡一个单身男人
- We must alert the church elders. - No.
- 我们得通知教会的长老 - 不
You don't understand. You didn't see how brazen she was.
- Sounds like you're a little jealous. - No, I'm not.
- 你好像在吃醋 - 我才没有
I just think it's wrong. I mean, here I am, about to pop...
...and he's out picking up some shopgirl at Sluts-R-Us?
Is that a real place?
Hey, Phoebe. Fatty.
嘿 菲比 肥婆
Hey, Chandler, why so fancy?
Well, I got a job interview. Big deal, too.
It's more money. I'd be doing data reconfiguration and statistical factoring.
- I think I know someone who does that. - Me. I do that.
- 我知道有个人就做那一行 - 那就是我
So seriously, do I look okay? I'm nervous.
Oh, yeah. You... Really, you look great.
You know, just don't get your hopes up.
- Why not? - Well, the interview.
- 为什么 - 你要去面试
- What about it? - You know.
- 所以呢 - 你知道的
You don't make a very good first impression.
- What? - Oh, you don't know.
- 什么 - 喔 你不知道啊
- Are you serious? - Yes. When I first met you, you were like:
- 你是说真的吗 - 我第一次见到你 你是这样的
What is it that I do?
It's just, like, you're trying too hard, always making jokes.
You just... You come off a little needy.
Did you like me when we first met?
Chandler, I'm not gonna lie to you.
But I am gonna run away from you.
Hi. I'm Monica Geller, chef at Allessandro's.
嗨 我是摩妮卡·盖勒 亚利山多洛斯的主厨
I think the things you said were unfair...
...and I would like you to give my bouillabaisse another chance.
I don't see any reason why I'd do that to myself again.
Either eat it or be in it.
- So, what do you think? - I'm torn...
- 你觉得呢 - 我很为难…
...between my integrity and my desire to avoid a beating.
But I must be honest. Your soup is abysmal.
Thattagirll Eh? We should get out of here, there's a new class coming in.
做的好 我们应该离开这里 新的一班要上课了
Welcome to Introduction to Cooking. Before we start...
...can anyone tell me the difference between hollandaise and bearnaise sauce?
- I can. - Okay, go ahead.
- 我知道 - 请说
Well, um, they both have a egg yolk and butter base.
But a bearnaise, um, has shallots, chervil, and most importantly, tarragon.
但贝纳斯酱有放葱 雪维菜 跟最重要的小龙艾
- Ha, ha, very good. What's your name? - Monica.
- 非常好 你叫什么名字 - 摩妮卡
- Monica, you go to the head of the class! - Okay!
- 你来当班长 - 好吧
All this stuff takes up a lot of room.
Hey, how, uh, serious are you about keeping Ben in your life?
My son? Pretty serious.
Oh, hey, Katie. What are you doing here?
嗨 凯蒂 你来这里做什么
The delivery went out and I realized they forgot this.
Ah, it must have been obvious, since it was the only thing left in your store.
Listen, to be honest, home deliveries aren't really part of my job description.
听着 老实说 我的工作不包括送货到家服务
Oh, um, I actually came here to ask you out.
Oh. Wow. Uh, yeah, that sounds great.
I'm just gonna put this back in my pocket and pretend that didn't happen.
Uh, I'm free now. You want to grab some coffee...?
- Sure. - Horny bitch.
- 当然好 - 荡妇
No, you're a horny bitch! No, you're a horny bitch!
你是荡妇 你是荡妇 不不
No, you're a horny bitch!
So you guys go, have a really good time.
I'm just gonna grab my coat. And, uh, my whip.
You know, because of Indiana Jones.
Not because I'm into S&M.
I'm not into anything weird, you know? Heh.
Just normal sex.
So I'm gonna grab my coat.
So you had a good day, huh? Big commission, picked up a daddy.
你今天过得很不错嘛 泡老爸 赚大佣金
Are you okay with this?
Oh, yeah. Yeah, please. You guys have fun.
当然 拜托 你们好好玩吧
- Okay. Heh. - Yeah.
- 好吧 - 对
It was nice to see you.
Oh, and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic.
Although you missed a button.
Oh, actually, I, um...
Oh, okay, I see what you're doing there.
I can't even believe this. I really come off that badly?
Ugh, it's okay. You calm down after a while...
...and then people can see how sweet and wonderful you are.
Good. Because I'm sure this interview's gonna last a couple of weeks.
All right, don't freak out, okay? I will help you.
好吧 别惊慌 我会帮你的
- How long before you have to leave? - An hour.
- 你什么时候要出发 - 一小时后
- I can't help you. - Phoebe...
- 我帮不了你 - 菲比…
We'll do our best. I'm the interviewer and I'm meeting you for the first time.
我们得尽力而为 我是面试官 我第一次跟你见面
- Okay. - Hi. Come on in. I'm Regina Phalanges.
- 好吧 - 请进 我是蕾吉娜·菲兰吉斯
- Chandler Bing. - Oh, Bing.
- 钱德宾 - 宾
- What an unusual name. - Well, you should meet my Uncle Bada.
- 你的名字很罕见 - 你应该见见我的巴达叔叔
I'll let myself out.
Your alfredo's dry. Did you use your cheese?
When you say "use," do you mean "eat as a pre-cooking snack"?
- And the cream? - Cheese makes me thirsty.
- 奶油呢 - 起司让我口渴
- Okay. Let's move on. - All right.
- 好吧 我们继续 - 好吧
Oh. Something smells good over at Monica's station.
My God! This is absolutely amazing! You've never made this before?
天啊 这真的是太好吃了 你从来没有做过这个
Oh, no. I don't know anything about cooking.
I had to ask what it was called when the water makes those bubbles.
Wow. Hats off to the chef.
I'm sorry, your mouth was full. I didn't hear what you said.
- Hats off to who now? - The chef!
- 跟谁致意 - 主厨
I think you'll find if I work here that I don't micromanage.
I don't shy away from delegating.
Mm-hm. That's good to know. But let's stop focusing on what you don't do...
...and focus on what you do do.
is manage to, uh, create an atmosphere of support for the people working with me.
I see. Nice sidestep on the "do do" thing.
- Hardest thing I've ever done in my life. - Oh, you gotta go!
- 那是我做过最难的事 - 你得出发了
- Okay, don't worry. You're ready. - Really?
- 别担心 你准备好了 - 真的吗
Absolutely! Just fight all your natural instincts, and you'll be great.
当然 跟着你的直觉走 你会很棒的
Ah, Monica, my star student.
Heh. You called me that before...
...so I took the liberty of fashioning a star out of foil.
Now, no pressure. If you like my cookies, you give me the star.
别觉得压力太大 如果你喜欢我的饼干 给我一颗星星
I know you all hate me, and I'm sorry, but I don't care.
我知道你们都恨我 对不起 但我不在乎
- Okay, Joey, you're up next. - Yeah.
- 好吧 乔伊 下一个是你 - 是的
Oh, my God! This is amazing!
I got an A? In school? Hey, I'm a dork!
Joey, I'm so proud of you.
- I think you should give him your star. - Excuse me?
- 我想你该把你的星星给他 - 你说什么
- He doesn't even know what he's doing. - We're all beginners.
- 他不知道自己在做什么 - 我们是初学者
- Nobody knows what they're doing. - I do. I'm a professional chef!
- 没有人知道自己在做什么 - 我知道 我是职业主厨
Oh, relax. It's not a courtroom drama.
What are you doing taking Introduction to Cooking?
I'm sorry. It's just that, um, I cook at this restaurant, Allessandrds...
...and, um, I just got a really bad review.
- Oh, Allessandro's? I love that place! - You do?
- 亚利山多洛斯 我喜欢那个地方 - 是吗
Yes, you're an excellent chef. As a person you're a little...
- Oh, totally crazy, but you liked the food? - Ha, ha. Very much.
- 我是很疯狂"但你喜欢那里的食物 - 非常喜欢
Okay, then. I don't stink. I'm a good chef! Okay.
好吧 那么我不赖 我是个好主厨 好吧
Whoa, whoa, whoa, I don't want to go. I'm having fun.
Actually, did either of you pay for this class?
Hey, if my friend says it's time to go, it's time to go!
如果我的朋友说 我们该走了 我们就该离开
Also, I was the point person on my company's transition...
...from the KL5 to GR6 systems.
- You must have had your hands full. - That I did. That I did.
- 你一定忙得不可开交 - 没错 没错
So let's talk a little bit about your duties.
You'll be heading a whole division, so you'll have a lot of duties.
- I see. - But there'll be 30 people under you...
- 我了解 - 你手下会有30个人…
...so you can dump a certain amount on them.
- Good to know. - We could go into detail...
- 那太好了 - 我们可以仔细地…
No, don't, I beg of you.
All right, then. We'll have a definite answer for you on Monday.
But I can say with some confidence, you'll fit in well here.
- Really? - Absolutely.
- 真的吗 - 当然
- You can relax. You did great. - I gotta say, thank you.
- 你可以放轻松 你表现的很好 - 谢谢
I was really nervous. I'm told I come on too strongly, too many jokes.
我真的很紧张 大家都说我太喜欢讲笑话 缓和气氛
And then it was really hard to side step that "duty" thing.
Oh, my God. This doesn't count. Okay? The interview was over.
天啊 这不算好吗 面试已经结束
That was the real Chandler Bing. This is some crazy guy in the hall.
Call security! There's a crazy guy out in the hall!
I'll look forward to your call.
- You're back from your date. - How are you?
- 你约会回来了 - 你还好吗
I'm fine. But that's not important. What's important is how was she?
我很好 但那不重要 重要的是她还好吗
Uh, it was fun. We just had coffee.
Oh, uh-huh, uh-huh, coffee, a little rub-rub-rub under the table?
Heh, what's going on? Do you not like Katie?
No. No, she was nice.
I mean, she was a little slutty, but who isn't?
Of course you did. You'd date a gorilla if it called you Indiana Jones.
Did you get a fresh batch of pregnancy hormones today?
No. It's just that... Katie bothered me.
不 那只是… 凯蒂让我觉得困扰
Why? What was wrong with her?
Ugh, there was nothing wrong with her. All right? She was perfectly lovely.
- Okay. So, what's the matter? - I don't want you to date her.
- 好吧 怎么了 - 我不希望你跟她约会
Heh, what? Why? What, are you jealous?
Yes. And not because I want you to go out with me.
Because I don't want you to go out with anybody.
I know it's a terrible thing to even think this and it's inappropriate...
...but I want you to be at my constant beck and call, 24 hours a day.
I'm very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
- Okay. - What?
- 好吧 - 什么
I won't date. I'll, uh...
I'll be here with you all the time.
But I'm being so unreasonable.
True, but you're allowed to be unreasonable. You're having our baby.
没错 但你可以无理取闹 你怀了我们的宝宝
Oh, Ross, thank you. Thank you.
No, not really. You're pressing the baby into my bladder...
...and now I have to pee. Sorry.
- Okay. - Rash?
- 好吧 - 瑞秋
- Yeah? - Just one thing. Um...
- 什么事 - 只有一件事…
We live together. You're having our baby. I'm not gonna see anybody else.
我们住在一起 你怀了我们的孩子 我不跟任何人约会
Are you sure you don't want something more?
Wow. I don't know, maybe...
Oh, Rach, I was just messing around. Heh.
- Like you did when I had to pee? - Oh! Ha! I knew that.
- 就像我要尿尿时你做的一样 - 我就知道
I knew that! I was just messing with you too!
Okay. Because for a minute you seemed...
- No, no, no, no. No! It's just... Ha! -...like you actually...
- 不 那是… - 像是你真的…
That's just because I'm such a good messer!
- Rash? - Yeah?
- 瑞秋 - 什么
- The bathroom? - Right.
- 你要上厕所 - 对
I had a great time. I learned how to bake, ate great food.
我非常愉快 我学会了烤东西 吃美食
The first A I've gotten since 7th grade and I didn't have to sleep with the teacher.
- Oh, look. Acting for Beginners. - Yeah.
- 你看"初级戏剧班" - 对
Wanna feel good about yourself?
- What the hell! - Okay.
- 管它的 - 好吧
All right, let's start with some basics.
Can anybody tell me what the difference between upstage and downstage is?
Yeah, this was a stupid idea.