Oh, my God, you cleaned! Look at these floors!
天啊 你打扫过了 看看地板
You did the windows!
I have been begging for months and you did, you cleaned!
- And nagging works! - No, uh, I didn't actually do this.
- 唠叨是有用的 - 不 事实上这不是我做的
Oh, no. Was I cleaning in my sleep again?
No, it wasn't you.
- Well, then, who? - I got a maid. Yay!
- 那么是谁 - 我请了一个女佣 耶
Oh, well, I hope by "maid," you mean "mistress"...
...because if some other woman was cleaning...
Now, honey, I know you don't like to relinquish control.
"Relinquish" is just a fancy word for "lose."
Look, she's really nice, okay?
And she mentioned that she adored the way that you arranged the sponges.
Did she really say that?
Yes, I distinctly remember because I thought it was a joke.
对 我会记得 因为我以为她在开玩笑
- Now, just give her a chance, okay? - Fine, I can do it.
- 给她一个机会 好吗 - 好吧 我办得到的
- What's the matter? - Usually when I'm anxious, I clean.
- 怎么了 - 通常我一焦虑就会打扫
# So no one told you life was gonna be this way #
# 没有人告诉你活着有多累 #
# Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A. #
# 上班受罪 口袋空空 爱情变累赘 #
# It's like you're always stuck in second gear #
# 寂寞又潦倒 受气又受累 #
# When it hasn't been your day, #
# 日复一日 年复一年 #
# your week, your month, or even your year #
# 时运不济 活着受罪 #
# but I'll be there for you #
# 你我永不离弃 #
# 'Cause you're there for me too #
# 你我相偎相依 #
Whose cell phone is that? It's just so annoying.
Everywhere you go.
I think it's coming from your bag.
I never get calls!
Hi, it's Eric, from the Halloween party. Ursula's fiance.
嗨 我是万圣节派对上的艾力克 乌苏拉的未婚夫
Oh, my God, Eric, hi! Wait, how'd you get this number?
天啊 艾力克 嗨 等一下 你怎么知道我的电话号码
I have a friend who's a cop, and he got it.
Wow. What an incredible violation and wonderful surprise!
I just... I thought you should know I broke up with Ursula.
Oh, you did? He did it, he did it!
- Wow, what did he do? - Shh! I'm talking.
- 他做了什么 - 我在讲电话
Anyway, I was wondering...
...if you were the sort of person who eats lunch?
Are you asking me out?
Because it'd be weird since you just broke up with my sister.
No, wait! I was just saying that so you'd think I was a good person.
不 等一下 我会那么说是希望你把我当成好人
Uh, I won't take no for an answer.
Not great, we can work on it at lunch.
Okay, um, I can be at your apartment in two hours.
Great. Uh, how do you know where I live?
I've got friends too.
- Okay, bye. - Bye.
- 好吧 再见 - 再见
Oh, my God, I'm going out with Eric!
Oh, this day is gonna be much better than I thought it was gonna be. Heh.
Oh, Ross, I can't make lunch.
So apparently I'm available for lunch.
Can't, I'm busy. I'm apartment hunting.
我没办法 我很忙 我在找房子
I can't live with Joey once the baby comes.
I don't want my child's first words to be, "How you doing?"
So does Joey know you're moving?
I haven't discussed it, but he's gonna be relieved.
Last week he brought this girl over...
...and I started talking to her about morning sickness.
Then I showed her pictures from my pregnancy book.
- That's not really porn. - Not so much.
- 那不会很煽情吗 - 一点都没有
You know what? If you're looking for a place...
...I heard in the elevator this morning that a woman in my building died.
Oh, my God. Was she old? Does she have a view?
天啊 她很老吗 她的公寓景观好吗
Well I don't know. But how great would that be, huh?
You living in my building?
I could take care of the baby, I could come over whenever I want...
...with your permission.
- That really would be great. - Yeah.
- 那真的很棒 - 对
Well, can we see it?
Oh, maybe we shouldn't. If she just died this morning. Out of respect.
Yeah. No. No, you're right.
- Shall we? - Yeah.
- 可以吗 - 好吧
- Yes? - Hi. I'm Ross Geller.
- 有什么事吗 - 嗨 我是罗斯·盖勒
I live in the building.
And I'm Rachel, an admirer of the building.
I heard about Mrs. Verhoeven passing away, and I am so sorry for your loss.
- She didn't pass away. - What?
- 她没有过世 - 什么
- My mother's still alive. - Oh, thank God!
- 我妈妈还活着 - 谢天谢地
It looked like we were gonna lose her this morning...
...but she's a tough old bird.
Are you close with her?
Uh, yeah. She and I would talk all the time...
...in the laundry room.
You know, I would, but it's just too painful.
So she's really not dead.
No. She's hanging in there.
Do you think...? Could you tell me, is she hanging in in a one-bedroom or a two?
Mrs. Bing, this tile cleaner is incredible. Where did you get it?
宾太太 这个清洁剂太棒了 你在哪里买的
Oh, well, um, I make it myself.
It's two parts ammonia and one part lemon juice. The secret ingredient is...
You know what? We just met.
Okay. Uh, I'm gonna get the clothes from the laundry room now...
...and when I come back, I'll clean behind the fridge.
I'll be back in a minute.
- See? I told you. - She stole my jeans!
- 看吧 我告诉过你了 - 她偷了我的牛仔裤
I have been looking for them all week and she is wearing them.
So she stole your pants...
...and then she came back and wore them in front of you?
Don't you see? It's the perfect crime.
She must have been planning this for years.
I will prove it to you.
About a week ago, I was wearing those jeans.
I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch.
When she comes back, I will find it and show you that stain!
她回来后 我会找到它 让你看看那个墨水印
Is it possible the company that sold the jeans...
...made more than just the one pair?
So shouldn't we give her the benefit of the doubt before we go...
...snooping around her crotch?
Fine. I'm just glad I didn't give her my secret ingredient.
Heh. Out of curiosity, what is your secret ingredient?
- Hi. - Come in. I'm so glad you're here.
- 嗨 - 请进 我很高兴你来了
Not in the shaky, angry way you are, though.
Sorry. I just saw Ursula.
I had to get the engagement ring back.
Just seeing her brought it all back.
All the lies, the way she used me.
I just... I get so angry, just looking at her...
- Face. - Yeah. Yeah.
- 我是说看到她的脸 - 对
I'm sorry. It's just, when I look at you...
And when I see her, I get a little bit angry.
- Maybe this is too weird. - No, wait.
- 或许这太奇怪了 - 等一下
There's only a problem...
...when I look at you.
No, don't tear out your eyes!
- I was just gonna take out my lenses. - Oh, yeah. Try that.
- 我只是要把隐形眼镜拿掉 - 好吧 试试看
So is that better?
You... Ugh. You're blurry.
But you still look like Ursula. You're "Blursula."
Okay, wait. Maybe...
好吧 等一下 或许…
If I just don't look at you for a while.
See? It works. I'm not angry at all anymore.
看吧 成功了 我不再生气
This is a great date!
Look, Eric, turn around.
听着 艾力克 转过来
Look, I like you, but it shouldn't be this hard. It's our first date.
我喜欢你 但不应该这么难的 这是我们第一次约会
First dates are supposed to be about excitement and electricity.
第一次约会应该是 刺激 火花四射…
And "Ooh, he touched my hand, did he mean touch my hand?"
"他刚刚摸了我的手 他是有意的吗 "
And, you know, first kisses, and...
Thanks for the coffee, or, uh, ahem:
Yeah, we're done.
You wanna go see that new IMAX movie on tide pools?
- Really? - No, ha, ha.
- 真的吗 - 不是
But I got Knicks tickets for you, me, and Chandler.
- Sweet! - All right, finish your coffee. Let's go.
- 太棒了 - 好吧 喝完咖啡就走
Okay, I have to stop by my place.
To tape the game? You do this every time. You're not gonna be on TV!
你要录球赛吗 你每次都这么做 你又没有要上电视
No, no, I have to see if this apartment became available.
- You're switching apartments? - Not for me, it's for Rachel.
- 你要换公寓 - 不是我 是瑞秋要搬家
- Rachel has an apartment. - When the baby comes, she's gonna move.
- 她已经有公寓了 - 宝宝一出生她就要搬家
- She is? - Yeah.
- 真的吗 - 对
You didn't expect her to live there with a baby, did you?
I guess I didn't really think about it.
Hey, Gunther, you're an ezel. Huh.
- Nice jeans. - Oh, thanks.
- 你的牛仔裤很漂亮 - 谢谢
- I like your top. - Oh. You're not getting it.
- 我喜欢你的上衣 - 你不会拿到它的
- What happened? - Oh. I fell asleep.
- 发生了什么事 - 我睡着了
I was thinking about taking my lunch break.
Will you do the top of the cabinets? That'll really work up your appetite.
噢 你能擦一下橱柜上面吗 那会让你午餐时食欲大增
I'm sorry. I've never had a maid before. Is this not okay?
抱歉 我没有请过女佣 这样子不行吗
- How was the game? - Uh, it was okay. I ate way too much.
- 球赛好玩吗 - 还不错 我吃太多了
So, um, I was talking to Ross and he said you were looking for a new place?
Oh, yeah. Hopefully across the street. If certain Dutch people would just let go.
对 我希望能搬到对街去 如果那些荷兰人愿意让出公寓
I was kind of hoping you'd stay.
But Joey, I have to go. There's no room for a baby here.
乔伊 我得搬走 这里住不下一个宝宝
No room? It's a baby. It's, like, this big.
住不下 只是一个宝宝 枕这么大吧
You could put it over here.
Or we could put it right here. Aw! Cute, right?
Or over here. You wouldn't even notice it.
"Where's the baby?" "Oh, it's right over..."
"宝宝在哪里 " "就在…"
Honey, it's not just a matter of where you put it.
A baby changes everything. They cry all the time.
Imagine bringing home some girl...
...and trying to score when there's a screaming baby.
I could use a challenge. It's getting pretty easy.
It's so sweet that you want me to stay, but I can't do that to you.
I mean, it would disrupt your entire life.
I love living with you so much.
- I wish things didn't have to change. - I know.
- 我希望一切都不必改变 - 我知道
You know, I blame Ross for this.
- I do too, a little bit. - Yeah.
- 我也有点怪他 - 对
I'm gonna miss you.
You're the hottest roommate I ever had.
Oh, no, I have to go. Ugh, I have a massage appointment.
不 我得走了 有人预约我去按摩
No, stay here. We'll keep doing this. I'll pay you.
不 留下来 我们继续吧 我可以付钱给你
No, I've gotten in trouble for that before.
不 之前我因为那么做 惹上了大麻烦
- I'll see you later? - Absolutely.
- 待会见 - 没问题
I love the way you kiss.
Really? That's the thing I'm worst at!
- Hey. - Hey! Um...
- 嘿 - 嘿
- I think Brenda needs a raise. - How come?
- 我想布兰达需要加薪 - 为什么
Because I put my head between her legs.
- To see her pants? - They're my pants!
- 你要看她的裤子 - 那是我的裤子
Are you sure? Did you see the stain?
No. I was getting into position, and everything went dark.
没有 我才刚刚就定位 后来就眼前一阵黑
God, she is not stealing from us, okay? Will you let this go?
- She's wearing my bra! - Oh, dear God.
- 她穿着我的胸罩 - 天啊
My pink flowered bra! I recognize the strap!
And yet you don't recognize that you're crazy?
Here's the plan, okay?
I'm going to leave, and you're gonna look at Brenda's bra.
Here's another plan. No.
I would do it, but she thinks I'm attracted to her.
- Why? - Did you not hear where my head was?
- 为什么 - 你不知道刚刚我的头放在哪里吗
Come on! We're a team. We're in this together.
I fear a jury will see it the same way.
Do this for me. I catch you looking at women's breasts all the time.
Do you see this? Unh...
All right. Yes, okay. I get your point.
But if it's not her bra, will you just let the woman clean?
You'll know it's mine because on the right cup, the lacy part...
...there's very a noticeable rip.
You need new clothes.
- Hi. How is she? - It's not looking good.
- 嗨 她还好吗 - 情况看起来不妙
Well, I, uh, brought her some bloemen.
Would you like to say goodbye? I'm sure it would mean a lot to her.
Oh, I don't know that it would. Heh.
- Well, her memory is pretty much gone. - All right, then.
- 她几乎不记得任何人了 - 那么好吧
- Hey! - Welcome back.
- 嘿 - 欢迎你回来
- Should we pick up from where we left off? - I don't know.
- 我们要继续吗 - 我不知道
I'm still tired from this afternoon.
- Why? - Uh, the sex.
- 为什么 - 我们做爱了
- What sex? - Our sex.
- 什么 - 你跟我做爱了
We didn't have sex.
Well if I didn't have sex with you...
...I had sex with somebody that looked an awful lot like...
- Ew. Ew. Ew, ew! - No, no, no, no!
- 噢 噢 - 不 不
- You had sex with Ursula? - A little bit.
- 你跟乌苏拉做爱 - 有一点啦
She walked in, I thought she was you and I kissed her and...
她走进来 我以为她是你 我吻了她…
You didn't notice different clothes?
I was just so excited to see you.
Ugh! You know what? This is too weird.
No. I don't wanna lose you. It's like I was saying to Ursula...
...when I was making love to her and thought she was you...
Yeah. It's too weird.
So I guess this is it.
Maybe it's for the best.
- You smell just like her. - Yeah, so do you.
- 你的味道跟她一样 - 对 你也是
- What are you doing? - I'm leaning.
- 你在做什么 - 我在弯腰
This is where I lean.
- Brenda, a bee! - What?
- 布兰达 有蜜峰 - 什么
Yes, it's flown into your blouse.
You better undo your buttons lest it sting you.
- I think I know what's going on here. - You do?
- 我想我知道这是怎么一回事了 - 是吗
Look, I know it must be hard that your wife is a lesbian...
听着 我知道你一定很难受 你太太是女同志…
...but it's wrong. You're married.
- I totally understand. - Okay, good. Ha-ha-ha.
- 我完全了解 - 太好了
Could I just see your bra?
- Where'd you get those jeans? - You gave them to me.
- 你怎么会有那条牛仔裤 - 是你送我的
- No, I didn't! - All right, I took them.
- 我才没有 - 好吧 我拿走它
I figured it was okay, you've got an ink stain on the crotch.
- Oh, no! Did you take my bra too? - What bra?
- 不会吧 你也拿走了我的胸罩吗 - 什么胸罩
- The pink one with the flowers. - You mean the one you're wearing?
- 有小花的粉红色胸罩 - 你是说你正在穿的这件胸罩吗
- What is this? - Hey.
Uh, this is just to give you an idea.
We can put screens here so the baby has privacy...
...and maybe a mobile, you know, over the crib...
...and, uh, here's a baby monitor which, until the baby comes...
...we can use as walkie-talkies. Eh?
You're so sweet!
Oh, my God! And you gave the baby Hugsy!
That's really just to show where the baby would go.
Why don't I hold on to him so there's no confusion?
Joey, the baby is gonna be crying. It's gonna be loud.
乔伊 宝宝会哭的 会非常地吵
- I'm loud. - It's gonna be up all night.
- 我很吵 - 他会整晚不睡
- I'm up all night. - It's gonna poop.
- 我也会 - 他会大便
What about the women you wanna bring home?
Look, if I'm bringing home a woman who can't stand being around a baby...
...then maybe I don't wanna be with that woman.
Or maybe we'll do it in the bathroom of the club!
- Joey, are you sure? - Yeah.
- 乔伊 你确定吗 - 对
Look, I know sometimes it'll be hard, okay...
听着 我知道 有时候会很辛苦…
...but it'll also be really, really great.
Please, Rachel, I really want you to stay.
拜托 瑞秋 我真的希望你留下来
I want me to stay too. Thank you.
Joey, look at this crib! It's so cute!
乔伊 看看这个摇篮 它好可爱
I know. I found it on the street.
Are you...? Really?
- This is in such good condition. - Yeah.
- 它看起来还不错 - 是啊
Wow. Whoa, what's under the cover?
- I don't know. - It's moving.
- 我不知道 - 他在动
- Aah! It's got a tail! Get it out! - Oh, aah! Okay!
- 他有尾巴 快把他丢出去 - 好吧
Well, the old lady died. And how do I know?
Because her dying wish was for one last kiss.
But I don't care because you got the apartment. Yes!
但我不在乎 因为你拿到那间公寓了 太棒了
Um, I think I'm gonna stay here.
What? You... But...
什么 你… 但是…