All right,that's the last servo.
Behold the Mobile Omnidirectional Neutralization and Termination Eradicator.
人家看到的 是全方位运动 销毁终结切割器
Featuring one articulated razor-sharp killing saw,one polycarbonate grinding and flipping wheel,
steel-armor plate exoskeleton top and bottom,and enough horsepower to drive a 110 pounds of mechanized death
from zero to holy crap in 4.8 seconds.
Is it wrong to say I love our killer robot?
As with my father,I both love and fear it.
All right,enough chitchat. Let's destroy something.
好了 废话少说 我们来搞点破坏
Okay. What shall be first to taste the wrath of Monte?
Maybe we should start small.
Okay. Oh, perhaps today is the day we finally find out...
好吧 也许今天我们最终可以搞清楚 这个魔法球里有什么了
Did it when I was four.
It's an icosahedral dye floating in tinted blue water.
Man,call "spoiler alert" before you say things like that.
How about the toaster oven?
What did the toaster oven ever do to you?
What did I ever do to Jimmy Mullins in the third grade?
He still punched me in the face with my own fists.
Sorry,you little nerd,you were just in the wrong boys' room at the wrong time.
抱歉 可爱的小呆子 你在错误的时间出现错误的房间
This is an auspicious moment.
Like Robert Oppenheimer or Neil Armstrong,
we need the appropriate words to mark this historic scientific event.
How about "Die,toaster,die"?
"死吧 烤面包机 去死吧!"怎么样?
All right,what's next?
No,I think I'm just going to stay in tonight and do laundry.
Oh,yeah,this door got the full Monte.
噢 耶 这门被猛械毁了
Killer robot. We built it.
Yeah,well,it almost killed me.
If it wanted to kill you,you'd be dead.
So,who exactly does it want to kill?
I'm sorry,are you unaware of the upcoming Southern California Robot Fighting League Round Robin Invitational?
抱歉 难道你不知道即将举行的 南加州机器人格斗循环邀请赛?
You know,since I moved last year,not all my mail has been forwarded.
知道吗 从我去年搬来以后 不是所有的邮件都被转寄掉
There's an awards banquet and a dance afterward.
Perhaps you'd like to come with me.
I know the other fellas would be really excited to see a girl there.
How is it supposed to be a dance if I'm the only girl?
Well,that may be a slight exaggeration.
You'd be the only doable girl.
You're a pig,Howard.
How is "doable" anything but a compliment?
Howard,why don't we just work on the robot?
拜托 莱纳德 现在不是时候
Once again,Penny and I have begun our little tango.
又一次 佩妮和我开始了 我们的双人探戈
The carnal repartee,the erotic to and fro.
But as delicious as the appetizer might be,
at some point we will have to succumb and eat the entr\e while it's still...
我们还是该屈从 吃下主菜 趁它还是...
I'm begging you,stop talking.
Look,normally I can just ignore you.
听着 通常呢 我无视你就好了
I mean,I get it-- you're a little peculiar.
You know,like Sheldon.
Excuse me,Penny,but in this room,you're the one who's peculiar.
抱歉 佩妮 但是在这间屋里 你才是古怪的那个
Yeah,you might be right.
I know you think you're some sort of smooth-talking ladies' man,
but the truth is,you are just pathetic and creepy.
So what are you saying?
I am saying it is not a compliment to call me "doable."
It's not sexy to stare at my ass and say,Ooh,
盯着我的屁股看并说 "喔~ 这肯定是果冻"
it must be jelly 'cause jam don't shake like that.
And most important,we are not dancing a tango,we're not to'ing and fro'ing.
还有最重要的 我们没有在跳探戈 我们没有你推我拉
Nothing is ever going to happen between us. Ever.
Wait a minute. This isn't flirting. You're serious.
等一下 这不是在调情 你在说真的?
Flirting? You think I'm flirting with you?
I am not flirting with you.
No woman is ever gonna flirt with you.
You're just gonna grow old and die alone.
Thanks for the heads up.
Howard,where you going?
I'm going home to live my creepy,pathetic life.
Well,someone had to say it.
He said maybe we should enter you in the killer robot competition.
Howard,the phone is ringing!
Here's a crazy idea,Ma: Answer it!
我有个疯狂的主意 老妈 接电话如何!
It's your friend,Leonard!
He wants to know why you're not at school today!
I don't go to school,Ma. I work at a university.
我不是去上学 老妈 我在大学就职
That's a school! Now pick up the phone!
I don't want to talk to anybody.
Should I ask Leonard to bring over your homework? !
I don't have homework.
I'm a grown man with a master's degree in engineering!
Excuse me,Mr. Fancy-Pants.
Want me to get you a Popsicle?
I ate the cherry. All that's left is green.
You make me want to kill myself.
I don't know,now they're just yelling about Popsicles.
Sounds like Penny really got to him.
I'm not surprised.
Despite his hard and crusty shell,Howard is a very sensitive man.
Do you know he writes poetry?
Mostly about men from Nantucket and hermits named Dave,
but he does it with real sensitivity.
Word around the pwasma wab is you built a wobot?
对 我们造了 克里帕奇
Well,if you have any dewusions about entering him against my wobot,
the Kwipke Kwippler in the Southern California Robot Fighting League Wound Wobin Invitational,
aka the S.C.R.F.L.R.R.I.,
his name is gonna be Swrap Metal.
Come on,is that really necessary?
Leonard,I believe it is.
This is trash talk,and trash talk is a traditional component in all sporting events.
Kripke,your robot is inferior and it will be defeated by ours
克里帕奇 你的机器人很差劲 会败在我们的脚下
because ours exceeds yours in both design and execution.
Also,I'm given to understand that your mother is overweight.
Now,of course,if that is the result of a glandular condition and not sloth and gluttony,
当然 如果是腺分泌的关系 而没有懒散和贪食
I withdraw that comment.
What difference does it make? Fat is fat.
There are boundaries.
Tell you what,forget the S.C.R.F.L.R.R.I.
Wet's settle this woboto a woboto.
There's no guarantee we're gonna go against each other in the Wound Wobin,
so let's throw down.
You know,unless you're afwaid.
We accept your challenge. Name a time and place.
Tomorrow,3:00,the kinetics wab.
明天 3:00 动力学实验室
No,don't make it so. Barry,we can't fight you tomorrow.
不 别定下来 贝瑞 我们明天不能和你战斗
Our engineer is incapacitated.
What's wrong with him?
He's depressed because he's pathetic and creepy and can't get girls.
他可悲又古怪 找不到女人 所以他抑郁了
We're all pathetic and cweepy and can't get girls.
That's why we fight wobots.
If you're not there,you'll be exposed to widicule.
I'm curious,what part of America is that accent from?
Hey,you got a minute?
Yeah,come on in. What's up?
有 进来吧 啥事呢?
- I need you to apologize to How... - Get out.
- 我需要你去给霍华德道... - 滚出去
Come on. Wolowitz won't come out of his house and we need him for a robot battle.
行行好吧 沃尔伍兹不肯出来 我们的机器人大战需要他呀
Well,then have the robot go and get him.
The robot didn't hurt his feelings.
His feelings needed to be hurt.
He's been in bed for two days.
Yeah,probably with a blow-up doll.
He's not with a...
Does it really matter who or what he's with?
The guy is devastated.
Oh,please,how could I possibly devastate Howard?
Okay,don't take this as a criticism,
but you kind of have that overexposed-to-gamma-rays thing going on.
What does that mean?
You know,like,most of the time,you're the easygoing Bruce Banner,
比如 大多数时候 你是和气的你
but then,when you get angry,you kind of turn into,like,you know...
Seriously? Gamma rays? Bruce Banner?
不是吧? 伽马射线? 你?
You didn't get The Incredible Hulk from that?
Never mind. Just,please go talk to him.
And say what? That I didn't mean it,because I meant it.
说啥呀? 说我并不是那个意思 可我就是那个意思呀
Well,maybe you can go at it from a different angle,like,um,
也许你可以从另外一个角度来谈 比如 嗯
you see a glimmer of goodness in him and you only said what you said
because you want to nurture it and make it shine.
Okay,let's try it this way.
Remember the day that we first met
and you asked me to go to your boyfriend's apartment to get your TV back
and he was nine feet tall and he took my pants off and you said...
他有九英尺高 把我裤子都扒了 然后你说...
What was that? What did you say?
Oh,yes. You said you owed me one.
噢 对了 你说你欠我个人情
Okay,come on,that's not fair.
嗷 得了吧 这不公平
I came home with no pants.
Fine,I'll go over there tomorrow.
I should probably give you a heads up about his mother.
She's a delightful woman. You'll love her.
Howard,there's a blonde girl,Patsy,here to see you!
Okay,now she's saying it's Penny.
I don't want to talk to her.
Was I supposed to tackle her?
So,I just came by to see how you were doing.
Good. Your mom seems nice.
People move away from her on the bus.
Okay,look. Howard,I just want to apologize.
好 听着 霍华德 我是来道歉的
For some things that I have said.
I've been informed that you have feelings.
And apparently,I have hurt them.
Fine. You're sorry. Good-bye.
好 你很抱歉 再见了
So... you're okay?
Hey,I'm a big boy.
I'm not traumatized by some random comment from some random woman.
I mean,get over yourself.
Oh,my God. That's Kripke's robot?
噢 我的天呐 那是克里帕奇的机器人?
As you can see,the Kwippler is weducing the Chevy Cavawier to wubble.
如你所见 克里骇人正把这辆 雪佛兰跑车史得粉碎
I can't watch anymore.
Sheldon,we have to call it off.
We don't have that option.
We've accepted the challenge.
We can't run away from a fight.
Oh,please,we've spent our whole lives running away from fights.
噢 得了吧 我们不是一直 都在临阵退缩么
Personally,I can squeeze through a hole in a fence half my size.
个人而言 我都能从比我小一半的 篱笆墙当中找个洞钻过去
Impressive as that may be,Monte is not us.
Monte has no fear.
Sheldon,did we all not just watch the same video?
Kripke's robot just had angry sex with a mid-sized automobile.
You are overlooking the fact that we now know what we're up against
and we can modify Monte so that he's prepared.
You want to prepare him?
Install a bladder and a pair of shorts so he can wet himself.
Excuse me,but how are we going to make any modifications without Wolowitz?
抱歉 不过没有沃尔伍兹 我们怎么进行改装?
- Have you heard from Penny yet? - Not yet.
- 佩妮那有信了没? - 还没
Have faith,gentlemen. We don't need Wolowitz.
打起自信来 先生们 我们不需要沃尔伍兹帮忙
Engineering is merely the slow younger brother of physics.
Do either of you know how to open the toolbox?
And then,when I was 14,I met Marcy Grossman.
之后 在我十四岁的时候 我遇见了马尔西·格罗斯曼
She was so beautiful.
She just got her braces off but they left a little of the overbite.
Like a sexy little chipmunk.
I didn't have the courage to ask her out,
but I dedicated a song to her at the ninth grade talent show.
Aw,that sounds sweet.
* Marcy Grossman is sunshine *
* 马尔西·格罗斯曼就是阴天的 *
* On a cloudy day *
* 一缕阳光 *
* When it's cold outside *
* 在天寒地冻时 *
* Marcy Grossman is the month of May *
* 马尔西·格罗斯曼就是那热情的五月 *
* I guess you'd say *
* 我猜你会说 *
* What can make me feel this way *
* 什么才能让我有这种感觉 *
* Marcy Grossman,Marcy Grossman,Marcy Grossman *
* 马尔西·格罗斯曼,马尔西·格罗斯曼,马尔西·格罗斯曼 *
* Talkin' 'bout Marcy * That's great.
- * 谈论着马尔西 * - 真棒
And then she came up with that sexy little chipmunk mouth
and spit in my hair.
Which brings us to tenth grade.
Howard,do you think maybe sometimes you try too hard?
霍华德 你觉不觉得有时 自己太心急太过火了?
What chance do I have if I don't try too hard?
Well... you'd have a terrific chance.
I mean,you're smart,you're funny. You have a cool job.
You build stuff that goes into outer space.
Look,I'm telling you,I've known you for,like,a year and a half
and this is the first time I feel like I'm talking to a real person.
And you know what? I like him. He's a nice guy.
而且你知道不 我喜欢他 他人不错
You really think so?
Nice little bot you've got here.
- What's this do,spin? - Yep. At 3400 RPM.
- 这是干嘛用的? 转齿? - 对 3400转每分钟
It can cut through steel like it was wubber.
Sheldon,we've got to call this off.
For years,merciless thugs like Kripke have made my life a series of painful noogies
多少年了 像克里帕奇一样的无良恶霸 让我的生活悲惨不堪
and humiliating wedgies and the insensitively named Indian burns.
But,Sheldon,we don't have a chance.
The only improvement you were able to make on the robot was to put fresh batteries in the remote.
What you fail to realize is Kripke suffers from a fatal flaw:
overconfidence from his robot's massive size and its overwhelming power.
That's not overconfidence. That's observation.
Trust me,Kripke will fall easy prey to my psychological warfare. Observe.
信我 克里帕奇很快就会倒在 我的心理战上的 观察吧
I would ask if your robot is prepared to meet its maker,but as you are its maker,
clearly the two of you have met.
What is his pwoblem?
Way to bust out the Jedi mind tricks,dude.
I just want to make sure that we're all clear.
Standard robotic fighting league rules apply.
Are you cwazy? This is a stweet fight.
The stweet has no rules.
He's right,Leonard. The paradigm is to the death.
他说得对 莱纳德 一直到死为直
I will,however,give you the opportunity to concede my superiority now
and offer me your robot as the spoils of war.
I'd rather see Monte dead than in your hands.
That could be easily arranged.
All right then. Weady. Set. Go.
那好吧 预备 开始
Come on,Sheldon,you got this.
来吧 谢尔顿 你可以的
Indeed. We are prepared for anything he can throw at us.
当然 我们做好了万全准备 他怎么对我们都不怕
- Run,Monte,run! - Go,Monte!
- 逃啊 猛械! 逃! - 闪啊 Mont!
- Monte! - Go,go,go,go!
- 猛械! - 跑! 跑! 跑! 跑!
Don't hurt us,don't hurt us,don't hurt us!
别伤害我们! 别伤害我们! 别伤害我们!
Well,so much for making up for the emotional wounds of childhood.
Monte was killed by my hubris and my pride.
No matter what anybody says,this is my fault.
No one's arguing with you,dude.
I got your text. How bad is... Oy.
我收到你短信了 它有多烂... 噢
Forget the robot. What happened to you?
He slipped and fell.
Yes,I slipped and fell. In the bathroom.
是 我不小心滑倒了 还是在浴室里
Bounced right off the tub.
Yes,now he knows what bathtubs are capable of doing when you don't treat them with respect.
对 现在他知道了 如果他不尊重浴缸的话 浴缸会给他好看的
They sucker punch you when your eyes are closed.
So what do you think,Howard?
It's not that bad,right?
Oh,no. A little electrical tape,some solder... Are you insane?
噢 不算 用点电线包布 一些焊剂... 你是疯了还是怎样?!
I've seen space probes that crashed into the desert that were in better shape than this.
You're right. Monte's gone.
We'll bury him in the morning. A simple ceremony. I'll speak.
我们明早去埋了它 做个简单的仪式 我来主持
Leonard,you'll play your cello.
Sheldon,honey,aren't you getting a little carried away?
谢尔顿 亲爱的 你是不是有点走火入魔了?
I mean,it's just a toy robot.
Just a toy robot?
I know,I got it.
Well,don't get the wrong idea.
The way I see it,I'm halfway to pity sex.
在我看来 她很快就会因为同情 然后跟我做爱了