Hand me the #6 torx screwdriver.
We can't do this. it's not right.
Sheldon, you have two choices.
Either you let him put a bigger hard drive in the tivo,
Or you delete stuff before we go out of town.
But once you open the box, you've voided the warranty.
The warranty is a sacred covenant
We've entered into with the manufacturer.
He offers to stand by his equipment,
And we in return agree not to violate
The integrity of the internal hardware.
This little orange sticker is all that stands between us and anarchy.
Okay, then we won't touch the hard drive.
We'll just erase the first season of battlestar.
There. we're outlaws.
Here you go, leonard. is this going to be big enough?
给 莱纳德 这个够大吗
For taking daffodils to your unicorn.
It's just for my notebooks.
I love san francisco.
I wish I was going with you.
I understand your envy.
This is a can't-miss symposium.
There are going to be discussions
on bioorganic cellular computer devices,
The advancements in multi-threaded task completion,
Plus a roundtable on the nonequilibrium green's function approach
to the photoionization process in atoms.
When I go, I usually just get hammered and ride the cable cars.
This conference is kind of a big thing.
The keynote address is being delivered by george smoot.
Oh, my god, the george smoot?
You've heard of him?
Of course I haven't.
George smoot is a nobel prize-winning physicist,
One of the great minds of our time.
His work in black body form and anisotropy of the cosmic microwave
Background radiation cemented our understanding of the origin of the universe.
It's kind of a funny name, though-- "smoot."
It's like talking to a chimp.
Okay, now that I've been completely insulted, have a good flight.
We're not flying. we're taking the train.
- Oh, cool. - yeah, cool.
Seven times as long as flying, and costs almost twice as much.
Well, then why are you doing it?
Well, we had a vote.
Three of us voted for airplane.
Sheldon voted for train.
So we're taking the train.
Don't say it like that,Leonard.
Say it like "we're taking the train!"
We're all going over to the apple store
To make fun of the guys at the genius bar.
Oh, I always enjoy that, but I'm a little busy.
I'm simplifying the task of packing for our trip.
See, by attaching rfid tags to my clothing,
It will enable my laptop
to read and identify the items with this wand.
I will then cross-reference them against destination,
Anticipated activity spectrum,
weather conditions, duration of trip,Et cetera.
天气情况 旅行时长 等等来确定带什么去
Well, that does sound much simpler.
How long is this going to take?
Assuming I can keep up this pace, three hours, 11 minutes,
And plus however long it takes
To conclude this fairly pointless conversation.
Wow. teasing the guys at the apple store seems a little redundant now.
I wouldn't expect you to. I'll see you later.
Sock, one pair, cotton, argyle, blue.
袜子一对 棉质 菱形花纹 蓝色
Sock, one pair, cotton, argyle, blue.
袜子一对 棉质 菱形花纹 蓝色
What on earth are you doing?
Whatever it is, I'm guessing we're doing it wrong.
Gentlemen, this is the coast starlight,
One of the great american trains
Operating on one of the classic american routes.
You'll see panoramic ocean vistas
inaccessible to any other form of transportation,
you'll be treated to 350 miles of costcos,
and cinder block homes with above-ground pools.
What's wrong with jiffy lubes?
That's over the wheelbase.
Are you completely unfamiliar with the suspension
Characteristics of a pre-1980 pullman-built superliner deluxe passenger coach?
Sheldon, we've been on this train 90 seconds,
And you've already said a thousand words.
Just tell us where to sit and shut up.
I'm hoping once you reap the endorphic rewards of the steady
Clickety-clack of steel wheels on polished rails,
Your sour disposition will abate.
Meanwhile, back in the 21st century,
People are raising their tray tables and putting their seat-backs in an upright position
'cause it's time to land in san francisco.
It's not so bad, really.
At least these trains have modern plumbing.
You squat over a hole in the train and expose
and expose your naked buttocks to the chilly air of Rajasthan.
He is referring, of course,
To third class on indian railways' magnificent ranakpur express and its
1,200-kilometer journey from maharashtra to the bikaner junction.
Oh, look, now he's boring on an international scale.
Is that who I think it is? it can't be.
What would summer glau be doing riding the train?
Maybe john connor's aboard and she's protecting him from an evil terminator.
可能约翰·康纳上车了 她来保护他 对付屠魔侠
Unlikely. that's a television show, leonard.
不太像 那是电视剧 莱纳德
Of course, if skynet actually did exist in the future,
A perfect way to infiltrate and destroy mankind would be
to send terminators back posing as actors who have played terminators in
Popular films and television series, lulling us into a false sense
a false sense of security, i.e., "that's summer glau "from the sarah connor chronicles.
"no, summer, don't kill me! I'm pro-robot! ahh!"
不 萨默 不要杀我 我真的是机器人
At least he's off the train crap.
Sheldon, I owe you an apology.
Taking the train was a stroke of brilliance!
I've actually got a shot at a terminator.
When it comes to terminators,
You've got a better shot of scoring with arnold schwarzenegger.
You're overlooking something.
I have 11 hours with her in a confined space.
Unless she's willing to jump off a moving train,
Tuck and roll down the side of a hill,
She will eventually succumb to the acquired taste that is howard wolowitz.
My money's on tuck and roll.
I thought you were involved in some sort of
Socially intimate pairing with leslie winkle.
Sheldon, let me explain to you how this works. all right.
-谢尔顿 告诉你这是为什么吧 -好吧
-That's summer glau. -yes.
Why do you get first crack at her?
Um, well, let's see, couple reasons.
One, I saw her first.
No, you didn't. I did.
But... then, let me move on to #2.
Unlike you, I can actually talk to women when I'm sober.
You fail to take into account that even mute, I am foreign and exotic,
While you, on the other hand, are frail and pasty.
Well, you know the old saying, "pasty and frail never fail."
Excuse me, but what about me?
Why don't I get a shot?
I've already got a gorgeous blonde back home that I can't score with.
I think I'll let you two take this one.
Sheldon, is there a place on this train to get alcohol?
Interesting that you ask.
The coast starlight recently added the refurbished pacific parlour car.
Built in 1956 and originally known as the santa fe lounge car,
The lower level is a theater and the upper Level is a bar that offers -which way?
-下层是剧院 上层是酒吧 提供... -行了 怎么走
Wine tastings if you're going as far as portland.
So aren't you going to go talk to her?
I will, I'm just working on my opening line.
She's probably heard every possible line, howard.
Why don't you just try "hello"?
No, no, no, that always creeps girls out.
I need to come up with something that's funny,
Smart and delicately suggests that my sexual
Endowment is disproportionate to my physical stature.
You're going to need more than 11 hours.
-Oh, no. -what's the matter?
-I forgot my flash drive. -so?
So we have to go back.
Okay, sheldon, I'm going to say "why"
And your answer cannot be "because I forgot my flash drive."
You don't understand.
My flash drive has my paper on
Astrophysical probes of m-theory effects in
The early universe that I was going to
Give to george smoot at the conference.
Why do you have to give your paper to george smoot?
It's brilliant. he needs to read it.
So you'll send him an e-mail when we get back.
Then I won't get to see his face light up as he reads it.
Oh, this is an unmitigated disaster.
Well, there's nothing you can do about it, so relax.
事已至此 无力回天 您就歇会吧
Sit back, enjoy the clickety-clack of the steel wheels on the polished rails.
You forgot your flash drive...
Only ten hours, 55 minutes to go.
It's hot in here.
Must be summer.
So... Where you gals headed?
Okay, I've found the perfect solution.
We get off the train at the next stop in oxnard.
We then take the 1:13 train back to union station.
We take a cab back to the apartment, get my flash drive,
And then race to san luis obispo, where,
Assuming the lights are with us and minimal traffic, we'll meet the train.
I've got a better idea.
Are you going to be sarcastic?
Boy, you take all the fun out of it for me.
Look, penny's home.
Why don't we just call her, have her go in the apartment,
Get your flash drive and e-mail you the paper?
But the flash drive is in a locked drawer in my desk. so?
The key is hidden in my room.
So? penny would have to go into my room.
So? people don't go in my room!
Well, it seems once again, you're caught between a rock and a crazy place.
Oh, I hate when that happens.
It must be summer.
It's hot in here. must be summer.
That's cute. really?
Have you seen slumdog millionaire?
Oh, yeah, I loved it.
It's loosely based on my life.
We're putting the play on for one night in this little 99-seat theater.
Do you know 98 other people that might want to come?
I'm about to give you a set of instructions,
Which you must follow to the letter.
The theater is above a bowling alley, so it's a little noisy,
But it might be the only chance I'll ever get
to play anne frank.
And the director is brilliant.
He uses the bowling sounds as, like, nazi artillery.
Okay, great, I'll see you then.
Do you see that small plastic case on my dresser?
Your dresser? who is this?
Oh, hey, sheldon!
噢 好啊 谢尔顿
How is san francisco?
I'm not in san francisco.
Were you even listening to me?
Uh, no, I was talking to my friend, but what's up?
没有 我在跟朋友聊天 怎么了
What's up? I'll tell you what's up.
I'm in a crisis situation,
And I need you to marshal your powers of concentration,
Limited as they may be...
Hi, penny. it's leonard.
What's going on with dr. wackadoodle?
He's calling to ask you a favor.
You might be confused because he didn't use the words, "penny," "sheldon,
你肯定很奇怪 因为他没用佩妮 谢尔顿
" "please" or "favor."
Locate your emergency key to our apartment.
Step two, enter our apartment.
Oh, hang on, sheldon, getting another call.
等等 谢尔顿 又有电话来了
Leonard, let me tell you something.
Personal robots cannot get here soon enough.
And that bright little star peeking her head out early today...
You really know a lot about space.
When you were on tv in firefly, you were actually in space.
You're not one of those guys who really believe that, are you?
You mean one of the hopeless geeks?
Those are crazy people.
Howard, be a dear and get me another one of these.
霍华德 做做好人 帮我再拿一瓶
Now, him, he's one of those geeks.
All right, now, before you enter my bedroom unescorted,
I need you to understand that this onetime
Grant of access does not create a permanent easement.
It's a legal right of access.
No, don't put me on hold.
Do you believe him?
Normally around women, he has the personality of a boiled potato.
Put one beer in him, and he's m. night charmalarmalon.
Is that what he's drinking?
It's not even real beer.
What? look at it.
Some sort of placebo effect, I guess.
Yes, I'm still here. where am I going? I'm on a train.
嗯 我还在 我还能去哪儿 我可是在火车上啊
What you'll be looking for is a small wooden box located
Between a hoberman's sphere and a sample of quartz flecked with pyrite.
It's collapsible icosidodecahedron.
No, the thing with the time on it is my alarm clock.
Actually, in india, the names of constellations are different.
Where you have the big dipper, we have the big curry pot.
You're making that up.
Now what are you going to do with me?
Look. what am I looking at?
Hi. I'm the small package good things come in.
Okay, I got a box, but there's no key in here. just letters.
好吧 我是找到一个盒子 但里面只有信没有钥匙
That's the wrong box. put it back.
Oh, sheldon, are these letters from your grandmother?
Don't read those letters!
Oh, look, she calls you "moon pie."
Put down the letters!
Hey, penny. it's leonard.
嗨 佩妮 我是莱纳德
Hey, leonard. how's the train ride?
嗨 莱纳德 坐火车感觉如何?
Listen, I don't know what you're doing right now,
But there are little bubbles forming on the corners of sheldon's mouth.
Okay, yeah, I kind of crossed a line.
What up, moon pie?
Nobody calls me moon pie but meemaw!
Hey, penny. leonard again.
嗨 佩妮 又是我莱纳德
So anyway, in the dream, you and I were ice skating, just the two of us.
不管怎样 在梦里 我们两个在滑冰 二人世界
I picked you up by your ankles and twirled
You round and round until your legs tore off.
I tried to stick them back on, but before I could,
You turned into a giant loaf of pumpernickel bread.
What do you think that means?
I really don't know.
I'll give you a little clue.
My favorite sandwich?
Salami on pumpernickel.
And did you know the word "pumpernickel"
Comes from the german words "pumper" and "nickel,"
Which loosely translates to "fart goblin"?
Okay, I found the box. now what?
好吧 我找到盒子了 接下来?
You're holding a japanese puzzle box,
Which takes ten precise moves to open.
Locate the panel with the diamond pattern and
Slide the center portion one millimeter to the left.
Then, on the opposite end of the box,
Slide the entire panel down two millimeters.
You'll hear a slight click.
Hang on. sheldon, do you have any emotional attachment to this box?
等下 谢尔顿 你对这个盒子有什么情结吗?
No, it's a novelty I ordered off the internet.
Did you hear the click?
Okay, here's another one.
If you married the famous rock guitarist johnny winter,
You'd be summer winter.
Okay, I'm going to just go for broke here and say I like you.
Do you realistically see any conversational path that would take me from
Where we are right now to a place
Where I could ask you out and you'd say yes?
I'll leave you in peace.
Would you mind if I just take one
Picture of us together for my facebook page?
Now, can I take one where it looks like we're making out?
Okay, now you're going to insert the flash drive into the usb port...
She calls me moon pie because I'm
Nummy-nummy and she could just eat me up.
Now, please put the flash drive in the usb port.
The one that looks like a little duck's mouth.
Terminator broke my phone.
Okay, I'll be honest with you.
I've just spent the last two hours imagining various scenarios in my head,
Trying to come up with some clever line to say to you.
But then I finally realized you're a human being; I'm a human being.
I could just say to you...
I'm sorry. this is me.
Hi, my name's leonard.
So, I'm thinking, you won the nobel prize what, three years ago?
So you must deal with a whole lot of "what has smoot done lately?"
My thought is we continue my research as a team-- you know, cooper-smoot,
you know, cooper-smoot, alphabetical--
and when we win the nobel prize, you'll be back on top.
With all due respect, dr. cooper, are you on crack?