生活大爆炸 第二季 The Big Bang Theory Season 2 第19集: 一山不容二虎 The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition

上映日期: 2,008

语言: 英语 / 北印度语

影片类型: 喜剧

导演: 查克·罗瑞 / 比尔·布拉迪

演员: 吉姆·帕森斯 / 约翰尼·盖尔克奇 / 凯莉·库柯 / 西蒙·赫尔伯格 / 昆瑙·内亚 / 莎拉·吉尔伯特 / 克里斯汀·芭伦斯基 / 凯文·苏斯曼 / 乔迪·琳·欧基菲 / 凯缇·萨克霍夫 / 吴汉


台词
Okay, it's done.
好了 灭了
Look, guys, for the future,
伙计们
I don't mind killing the big spiders,
我不介意以后帮你们灭大蜘蛛
But you have to at least try with the little ones.
但那么小的不用我出手吧
Penny, please.
佩妮 拜托
We're facing a far more serious problem than stray arachnids.
我们面对的问题可比蜘蛛纲动物严峻得多
Sheldon, it's not so bad.
谢尔顿 没那么严重
Not bad? it's horrible.
不严重 简直是毛骨悚然
I mean, you hear stories about this sort of thing,
你觉得像听故事一样
But you never think it'll happen to you.
以为不会发生在你身上
So they steamed your dumplings.
他们不就是把你的饺子蒸了一下嘛
Get over it.
算了吧
New topic, please.
拜托 换个新话题
All right, penny.
好吧 佩妮
Let me take this opportunity to point out
我借这个机会向你表达
That you are looking particularly ravishing today.
你今天看起来相当令人销魂
Not with a thousand condoms, howard.
霍华德 一千个套套都别想
So, there is a number.
这么说还真有个数量
Okay, new topic, please.
拜托 换个新话题
Hey, did you hear the people upstairs in 5a are moving out?
你们知道楼上5A的人要搬出去吗
- No, shh-shh-shh! - what?!
-别说 嘘 -虾米
The people upstairs are moving out.
楼上的人要搬了
No!
别说
The horror...
恐怖至极
Why would you just say something like that?
你干嘛非要提这事呢
No, no, no, no, no, no, no...
不 不 不
How else was I supposed to say it?
那我还能怎么说
Slowly. like putting a new fish in a tank.
慢一点 就像放一条新买的鱼进鱼缸
You don't just drop it in.
不能直接丢进去
You let the bag sit in the water a while.
要连鱼带袋子先放进去一段时间
The horror...
恐怖至极
Sheldon, I'm sure it's going to be fine.
谢尔顿 我保证不会有事的
No, it's not going to be fine.
不可能会好了
Change is never fine.
改变总是不好的
They say it is, but it's not.
人们说改变是好事 事实才不是
Okay, honey, did you even know the people that are moving out?
亲爱的 你认识那些要搬的人吗
I never met them.
我从没见过他们
That's what made them perfect.
这样他们才完美
There were no awkward "hellos" in the halls.
不用尴尬地在楼道打招呼
There's no clickety-clacking of high heel shoes on hardwood floors.
不会有高跟鞋踩在木质地板的咔咔声
They may as well have been a family of
这一家就像是一窝小猫
Cats just jumping around from drape to drape.
从这个窗帘跳到那个窗帘
Without that annoying ammonia urine smell.
但没有尿液中恼人的氨味
Well, I'm sure the new people will be just as quiet.
我保证新来的也会安安静静的
You can't know that.
你怎么知道
How can you possibly know that?
你怎么可能知道
You're right, I can't. you know what?
对 我不知道 告诉你
Anyone could rent that apartment now.
任何人都可能租那个房
an opera singer, the cast of stomp...
歌剧歌手啦 跺脚舞演员啦
Yeah, a tap-dancing pirate with a wooden leg.
有条木腿的踢踏舞海盗啦
Why are you making it worse?
你干嘛要越搞越糟
I tried making it better. he wouldn't go for it.
我想搞好点 他不干而已
You're right! that's a great idea.
对啊 真是好主意
- What? - I'll take the apartment upstairs.
-什么 -我去租那个房
I can finally get away from my mother
我就能摆脱我妈
And we can all spend some more time together.
我们也有更多时间聚聚
If you catch my drift.
明白我的用意吧
The horror...
恐怖至极
Hold on. You honestly expect me to believe
等等 你真以为我会相信
that social protocol dictates we
社交礼仪规定
Break our backs helplping wolowitz move,
我们不惜弄伤腰骨帮沃罗威茨搬家
and then he only need buy us a pizza?
而他只要给我们买份匹萨吗
I'm sorry, that really is how it works.
抱歉 事实就是这样
You' tricking me.
你骗我
You tell me the truth, what do we get?
说实话 好处到底是什么
Raj, help me out here.
拉杰 搭救我吧
You get to choose between a mountain bike or a ps3.
你能在PS3[索尼游戏机]和山地车中任选其一
I knew it!
我就知道
Ps3, definitely ps3.
PS3 肯定选PS3
Who would pick a mountain bike?
有谁会选山地车
Enough with the guilt, ma.
别再自责了 妈
We'll still see each other.
我们还会见面
I'll come over every night and have dinner with you.
我每天晚上回来和你吃饭
The hell you will!
你会才怪呢
What am I running here, a fancy restaurant?
我这成什么了 星级餐馆吗
Does this look like olive garden?!
这里像橄榄园餐厅吗
Okay, I get it, you're angry.
我知道了 你生气
You don't want to see your little bird leave the nest.
你不想让你的小小鸟离巢
"little bird"?
小小鸟
You're almost 30!
你都快30了
Fly, for god's sake!
看在上帝的份上 快飞吧
Fine, I'll stay!
行 我不走了
Ya happy, crazy lady?
高兴了吧 疯婆子
I sure as hell hope so,
肯定高兴死了
because you're ruining my life!
因为你就是要毁掉我的生活
Hey, penny? it's leonard.
佩妮 我是莱纳德
Good news, you can take your head out of the oven.
好消息 你不用把头放进烤箱了
I guess I won't be needing this.
看来也不用戴这个了
Oh, no...
苍天啊
The new ones.
新来滴
They're here.
他们来了
Stay calm. we don't know anything about them yet.
冷静点 我们还不了解他们呢
What are you doing?
你这是干嘛
I'm checking for musical instruments.
我查查有没有乐器
Does that sound like castanets to you?
像不像响板的声音
The box says "kitchen."
盒子上写着厨房呢
So?
那又怎样
do cocaine smugglers write "cocaine" on the box?
毒贩会在盒子上写可卡因么
Hello?
你们好
Hello. hello.
-你好 -你好
Hello. hello. hello.
-你好 -你好 -你好
I'm Alicia.
我叫艾丽西娅
I'm moving in upstairs.
我搬来楼上住
That is so great.
那真是太好了
Oh, I'm leonard.
我叫莱纳德
I live downstairs.
我住下面
Upstairs from here, but under you.
在这层的楼上 不过还是在你下面啦
Not under you per se, but under your apartment.
不是在你人下面 是你楼下
That's nice.
挺好
Yeah, it is.
是啊 挺好
If that concludes your faltering attempt to mate...
你的举动表明你有和她交配的冲动
Hello.
你好
Hello.
你好
Hello.
你好
On a scale of one to ten
从一到十打分
How light of foot would you describe yourself
你怎么给自己打分呢
With one being not cat-like at al
一表示一点也不像猫
And ten being freakishly feline?
十表示你是猫中之猫
"freakishly feline"?
猫中之猫?
Is that your answer or do you not understand the question?
这是你给出的答案还是你没有理解问题
We'll come back to that one.
先不说这个
Sheldon...
谢尔顿
Hang on.
等一下
Are you now or have you ever been a salsa
你目前抑或过去有没有跳过萨尔萨舞
Irish folk or break-dancer?
爱尔兰民族舞或者霹雳舞
No.
You're making her uncomfortable.
你弄得别人不舒服了
Oh, I'm sorry.
抱歉
Well, if it helps you feel any better
到现在为止你表现很不错
you're doing very well so far.
希望能让你感觉好点
Next question,are you fertile?
下个问题 你有生育能力吗
What?!
什么
I'm trying to determine whether crying
我在判定婴儿在我头上
Infants above my head are a possibility.
哭哭啼啼的可能性
I have no immediate plans.
我现在没这个打算
If that changes, let me know.
改变主意的话 记得告诉我
And finally, area rugs, pro or con?
最后一个问题 铺小地毯 赞成还是反对
Pro? alicia?
-赞成 -艾丽西娅
Yes? welcome to the building.
-怎么 -欢迎你入住
Thanks so much for helping me, leonard.
莱纳德 太感谢你的帮忙了
Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to help.
感谢你给我帮忙的机会
Oh, hey, guys.
伙计们
Hey, penny. this is alicia, our new neighbor.
佩妮 这是艾丽西娅 我们的新邻居
Hi.
你好
Hi.
你好
I'm helping.
我在帮她忙呢
I can see.
看得出来哦
Alicia's non-musical, childless and pro-rug.
艾丽西娅对音乐不感冒 无子女 赞成铺地毯
She's still on probation, of course, but I like her.
她还在我的考察期内 但我看好她
Cool t-shirt.
T恤很酷啊
Oh, yeah, I don't usually dress like this.
是吗 我一般不这样穿的
I'm going jogging.
我去慢跑
You don't jog.
你好像从不慢跑吧
I can start.
现在开始
True
But the more likely explanation for your
但是对于你的穿着 更可信的解释是
Attire is that you're out of clean clothes again.
你又没干净衣服换了
Thank you, sheldon.
谢尔顿 我谢谢你
You're welcome, penny.
佩妮 不客气
Please, you look cute.
没事 你看起来很可爱
I'm dressed like a slob today, too.
瞧 我今天也穿得邋里邋遢的
I think you look fantastic.
我觉得很惊艳啊
This one's a player, huh?
他挺会演戏吧
Oh, yeah, be careful.
是啊 你要小心哦
Thanks for the warning. okay.
谢谢提醒
-I'll see you around. -see ya.
-过会儿见 -拜拜
I'm dressed like a slob today, too.
瞧 我今天也穿得邋里邋遢的
Oh, mimicry.
鹦鹉学舌啊
I enjoy mimicry.
我喜欢玩鹦鹉学舌
I've been working on admiral ackbar from return of the jedi.
我模仿过星战第六部的阿克巴上将
"it's a trap."
"这是个圈套"
You have to imagine me with a giant squid head.
你得把我想象成一个大乌贼脑袋
"it's a trap."
"这是个圈套"
"it's a trap."
"这是个圈套"
"it's a trap."
"这是个圈套"
Come.
请进
Congratulations, I see you did your laundry.
祝贺一下 你终于洗衣服了
-Well, sort of. -how does one "sort of..."
-这个 算是吧 -什么叫算是吧
I bought new clothes, okay?
我买了新衣服 行了吧
Is leonard around?
莱纳德在不在
He's upstairs at Alicia's.
他在楼上跟艾丽西娅一起
Oh. all right, that's cool, no biggie.
好吧 行 没啥
He said he'd help me set up my printer, but I guess I can wait.
他答应过帮我装打印机 再等一会吧
What exactly is he doing up there?
他到底在楼上干什么呢
In what I can only perceive as a tactical move to destroy me,
我认为是旨在毁灭我而进行的战略行动
He is with wolowitz and koothrappali setting up her stereo.
他跟库萨帕里和沃罗威茨在帮她装音响
Oh, they're all up there, huh?
他们都在楼上 是吗
Hmm, typical.
正常
It's axiomatically atypical.
这很明显不正常
Up until recently, they did not know alicia,
到现在为止 他们不了解艾丽西娅
And had no encounters with her in a previous location.
也没有在其他地方相处过
They never went upstairs to visit the former tenants,
以前他们从不上楼拜访房客
So your characterization of their behavior as "typical"
而你将他们的行为鉴定为正常
Is demonstrably fallacious.
是绝对的谬误
Okay, now I see the giant squid head.
好了 现在我看到一颗大乌贼脑袋了
Oh, great! now, I have to start all over again.
这下好 我又得重新来一遍
Yeah, I thought about renting this apartment,
我是想过租这房子
But I'm really more of a
不过我更像那种城里
"downtown loft" kind of guy.
住跃层的黄金单身汉
Cool. so are you in a loft now?
不错啊 你现在住跃层吗
Oh, actually,
事实上
I'm, uh, living with a woman in altadena.
我现在阿塔迪纳那里和一个女人同居
Purely platonic. she's also my maid.
不过是纯柏拉图式的 她同时是我的女佣
Sounds like a sweet deal.
听起来蛮不错的
I won't lie. it's pretty dope.
不过说实话 她差你太远了
Hello?
有人吗
Hey, I just wanted to bring you a little housewarming gift.
我过来给你带了些欢迎礼物
That is so sweet.
那真是太好了
Come on in. let's open it. great.
进来 我们打开看看吧
Nice dress.
你这裙子不错
Oh, this? I'm dressed like a slob today.
哪里哪里 我今天穿得邋里邋遢的
The guys have been helping me set up my sound system.
他们正在帮我设功放
I've never had such good-looking technical support.
他们真是我有过最帅的技术帮手了
Oh, pish-posh.
哪里哪里
I don't know, it means shucks.
我怎么知道 它意思是不值一提
"shucks" means shucks.
不值一提就是不值一提的意思
Let one go once in a while.
你就不能等等再说这个
-Hey, uh, penny, you want to hear something awesome? -Yeah.
-对了佩妮 你知道还有什么奇事吗 -什么
Alicia is an actress, just like you.
艾丽西娅跟你一样也是个演员
That is so awesome.
太棒了
Well, trying to be, but it's so hard.
想是这样想 但也没那么容易
Yeah, I know, tell me about it.
是啊 跟我说说关于你的事
I've been out here three months,
我在这里待了足足三个月
And all I've gotten is a couple of national commercials
结果只搞到几个全国广告
And this recurring thing on a soap.
还有肥皂剧的小客串
That's why I work at the cheesecake factory.
所以我现在还在蛋糕店工作
I'm holding out for the right part.
我感觉那些角色都不适合我
Alicia, what do you want as your default setting for dvds
艾丽西娅 你DVD想怎么设啊
5.1 dolby or dts?
5.1杜比还是家庭影院
Whatever you think is best, cutie.
你看着办好了 小可爱
Well, dts has more low end, so...
家庭影院的低音更好 那就...
Okay.
好的
Uh, hey, guys, guys, you will really appreciate this.
对了各位 你们绝对会喜欢这个的
I read the best science joke on the internet.
我刚在网上读了个超赞的科学笑话
Alicia, you won't get it, but it's right up their alley.
艾丽西娅 你不懂的 但是他们很喜欢这个
Anyway, so, this physicist goes into an ice cream parlor
就是 从前有个物理学家
every week and orders an ice
每周都去冰淇淋店点两个圣代
Cream sundae for himself, and then offers one
一个自己吃
To the empty stool sitting next to him.
一个放在旁边的空座位
This goes on for a while until the owner finally asks him what he's doing.
好久都是这样 直到店主好奇问他为什么
The man says, "well, I'm a physicist,
他说 因为我是物理学家
and quantum mechanics... Teaches us "that it is possible
而量子物理理论 告诉我们总有几率
For the matter above this stool "to spontaneously turn into a beautiful woman
这张空座位上面 的物质会变成一个
Who might accept my offer and fall in love with me."
可能爱上我的MM
The owner then says, "well, lots of single,
店主然后说 这里每天
"beautiful women come in here ever day.
都有大队单身MM
"why don't you buy an ice cream for one of them,
你干嘛不买冰淇淋泡她们
And they might fall in love with you?"
让她们爱上你
And the physicist says, "yeah, but what are the odds of that happening?"
物理学家说 那个发生的几率又可能有多大呢
It's a little insulting, don't you think?
这有点侮辱人 你不觉得吗
How would I know?
怎么会知道
I'm not even sure I get it.
我自己都不理解这有什么好笑的
Hey, leonard?
对了 莱纳德
If you're done with the dvd player,
你装好那个DVD以后
can you set up my printer?
能不能再帮我装这个打印机
Uh, yeah, I'd love to.
乐意为您效劳
Uh, hey, maybe when you're done with her printer,
等你装好她的
You could set up mine.
来装我的吧
You know, like you promised... a week ago.
你知道 你答应的...在一周前
Yeah, I'll get to it-- don't nag me.
好的 我会来的 先别烦我
Hello there
好啊 美女
Who is it?
是谁啊
Oh hello, penny. It's open-- come in.
你好 佩妮 门是开的 请进
Sarcasm.
这就叫讽刺
Well, they're all still up there.
他们还都泡在楼上呢
You think I can't hear them?
你以为我没听见吗
Listen to that. Stomp, stomp, stomp.
听听啊 呯呯呯
That's wolowitz in his stacked heels that fool no one.
那是沃罗威茨踩他那个高跟皮鞋 没错的
I don't even know why I care.
我不知道我为什么会介意呢
I don't care.
我才不介意
All right, I cared enough to memorize that stupid joke, but that's all I care.
好吧 我介意得去背那个白痴笑话 但是我只介意到那个程度
You know, penny, there's something that
你知道吗 佩妮 蜂窝实际上
Occurs in beehives you might find interesting.
很有趣的
Occasionally,
有时候
A new queen will arrive while the old queen is still in power.
新的蜂王会在老蜂王还在位时闯进来
When this happens,
此时
The old queen must either locate to a new hive or
老蜂王要不另谋出路
Engage in a battle to the death until only one queen remains.
要不就去拼个你死我活
What are you saying, that I'm threatened by alicia?
你说什么呢 我被艾丽西娅威胁了?
That I'm like the old queen of the hive and it's just time for me to go?
难道你说我是那个老蜂王 现在该滚蛋了
I'm just talking about bees.
我只是在说蜜蜂
They're on the discovery channel.
探索频道在播这个
What are you talking about?
你在说什么呢
Bees.
蜜蜂
I just got that physicist joke.
我理解那个物理学家笑话了
Gee, penny, thanks for buying us dinner.
佩妮 谢谢你给我们买晚饭
Yeah, what's the occasion?
是啊 今天怎么了
No, no occasion-- just felt like getting
没什么 只是感觉应该
some chinese chow for my peeps.
给我的好朋友带点中国菜
Did you remember to ask for the chicken
你记得我叫你点的鸡里面
With broccoli to be diced,
莴苣要切块
Not shredded? Yes.
-不要切丝 -记得
Even though the menu description specifies shredded? Yes.
-即使菜单明确说要切丝 -记得
Brown rice, not white? Yes.
-红烧饭 不要白烧? -记得
You stop at the korean grocery and get the good hot mustard?
-在韩国杂货店买质量好的热芥末
Yes.
记得
did you pick up the low-sodium soy sauce from the market? yes.
在超市买低钠酱油? -记得
Good.
不错
See how it's done, leonard?
看看别人怎么做的 莱纳德
So, what do we got going on tonight, huh?
我们今天晚上玩点啥
Playing halo watching battlestar, drop some mentos in diet coke?
玩光晕 看太空堡垒 还是把曼妥思丢到可乐里?
You want to watch battlestar?
你想看太空堡垒?
What can I say? I got my geek on, boys.
我还能说什么呢? 我不可救药地爱上了它
No, no, pms is different.
不 经前综合症的表现和这个不同
Oh, thank god you're home. I need help. what's wrong?
-谢天谢地你在家 我需要帮助 -怎么了
I just got a callback to audition
我接到电话让我去试镜
For csi to play a hooker who gets killed.
在里演一个被杀了的妓女
Oh, I'd watch that.
那我一定要看
But my car is in the shop,
但我的车还在修
And I have to be at universal in 45 minutes.
我得在45分钟内赶到环球影城
Okay, well, I'll take you.
没问题 我带你去
Oh, you're a lifesaver.
你真是及时雨
I'll run lines with you in the car.
我可以在车上帮你对台词
Great.
太好了
And afterward, I'll take you all out for chinese.
完事之后我带你们去吃中餐
Oh, actually, that's okay. we already have...
实际上 不用担心 我们已经...
Yum. starving.
嗯 饿死啦
...chinese food right here.
在这儿吃中餐了
They're gone, penny. They can't hear you.
他们已经走了 佩妮 听不到你说什么了
I cannot believe they're letting her just use them like that.
真不敢相信他们就这样任她利用
I mean, anything she wants, they go panting after her like trained dogs.
她一句话就让他们 像看家狗一样跟在后面
You know that just last week,
你知道就在上个星期
She had howard drive all the way to her
她让霍华德大老远开车带她
Uncle's house in orange county to pick up her tv?
去橘子郡的叔叔家里取她的电视
You once had leonard and me get your television from your ex-boyfriend.
你曾让我和莱纳德帮你 从前男友那里要电视回来
Apples and oranges here, sheldon.
性质不同 谢尔顿
That girl is a user iceskating through the life on her looks,
这个女孩利用他们 靠脸蛋儿过着舒服日子
Taking advantage of innocent,
占那些单纯的
Weak-willed men, getting auditions for stupid network shows.
意志力薄弱的男人便宜 去弱智电视剧试镜
It just creams my corn.
现在还在我的地盘撒野
May I interject something here? please.
-我能打断一下么? -说吧!
You got the wrong mustard.
你拿错芥末了
Guess what? I got the part on csi.
你猜怎么着? 我拿到里那个角色了
Oh, boy.
哦 天哪
Something wrong?
有什么不对劲么?
Uh, no. no, no, no, you know, congratulations.
不不不不 恭喜你
I think you'll make a great hooker.
我觉得你会是个出色的妓女的
Thank you.
谢谢
Hey, I got to ask you something.
我想问个问题
How much do physicists make?
物理学家挣多少钱啊
Um, I don't know. I don't think a lot.
不清楚 不会太多吧
Yeah, that's what I figured.
我想也是
Well, got to run.
我闪人了
The guys promised to set up my satellite dish
他们答应帮我装电视天线
And paint my bedroom. yay!
还有粉刷卧室
Um, hey, hey, can I talk to you about that for a second?
我能说两句么
About what?
说什么
Well, you know, it's just that leonard and howard and raj,
我想说 莱纳德 霍华德和拉杰
They aren't like other guys.
他们不像一般的男生
They're special.
他们很特别
Okay, they're special... and?
是很特别 那又怎样
Oh, let's see. how can I explain this?
怎么说好呢
Um, they don't know how to use their shields.
他们不会用保护层
Shields?
保护层?
Yeah, you know, like in star trek,
就像在星际迷航里
When you're in battle and you raise the shields?
作战的时候你会架设保护层
Where the hell'd that come from?
老天这句话是怎么溜出来的
Anyways, um, you know how guys like this are, so...
总之 你知道这样的男生很容易...
Please don't take advantage of them.
请不要利用他们
Who says I'm taking advantage of them?
谁说我利用他们了
Come on. they're doing everytng for you,
拜托 他们为你忙来忙去
Because you're leading them on.
还不是你招惹他们
So I let them do stuff for me.
我让他们帮我的忙
They're happy. I get stuff.
他们高兴 我受益
Who cares?
有什么不好
And how's it any different from what you do?
和你所做的有什么不同
Excuse me?
你说什么
I've seen you around them.
我看你也老围着他们
Are you pretending like you don't do the exact same thing?
好像你没做过同样的事
Okay, lady, you are way out of line.
姐姐 你过了啊
Oh, I'm out of line?
到底谁过了?
Yeah, you're out of line.
对 你过了
Well, what are you going to do about it...
你想怎么着
Bitch?
婊子
I like green lantern.
我喜欢绿灯侠
I'm just saying it's pretty lame that
我是说 他会被黄灯击倒
He can be defeated by the color yellow.
真是太逊了
Only the modern green lantern is vulnerable to yellow.
只有现代绿灯侠才怕黄灯
Golden age green lantern was vulnerable to wood.
黄金年代绿灯侠怕的是木头
Great, so I can take them both out with a number-two pencil?
不错 我用一支2B铅笔就能把他们两个都解决了
Oh, my god! girl fight!
天啊 女人打架!
What are you doing?!
你干什么
I know you. you're stupid enough to break it up.
我知道你肯定傻到想去劝架
May I say you look very comely tonight?
容我说一句 你今晚很清秀嘛
Thank you.
谢谢
You're right, this filly's been broken.
你说的没错 这匹小母马瘸了
you set it on dts, didn't you?
你帮她设置了家庭影院对吧
I had to.
没办法
She called me "cutie."
她叫人家小可爱嘛
According to alicia's facebook page,
从艾丽西娅的个人主页看来
She's hooking up with one of the producers on csi.
她搞上了一个CSI的制片
Well, dead whore on tv, live one in real life.
电视上演死妓女 生活中是活妓女
Oh, great.
很好
Now she's jumping up and down on the bed.
她现在开始玩蹦床了