Look at us, getting ready for a double date
With actual women who publicly acknowledge
They're our girlfriends.
Yes, actual women are the best.
I don't understand.
What other kind of women are there?
Howard, artificial women are your department.
You want to take this?
No, it would just freak him out.
Listen, before we leave,
I should warn you, I'm a passionate man
And I tend towards public displays of affection.
What are you trying to tell me, Howard?
There might be some making out in the car or the restaurant,
And I don't want Bernadette to feel uncomfortable,
So it would help if you and Penny made out, too.
We're planning to have sex right on the salad bar.
Namaste, white people.
I rented us the four-hour edition of Watchmen.
- Got it. - Seen it.
Detailed analysis posted online.
Well, then what are we going to do tonight?
Howard and I are going out to dinner
- With penny and bernadette. - Yeah.
No more carefree bachelor nights for me and Leonard.
These broncos have been saddled.
How did we get actual women?
They get girlfriends, and they just abandon us?
It is great, isn't it?
- We have a wonderful evening ahead of us. - We do?
Oh, yes. I just discovered I don't have
Enough room ony hard drive for a Linux partition,
So you and I are going to perform a full backup,
Reinitialize and then reinstall all my operating systems.
I don't want to do that.
Well, I'm going to perform full backup,
Reinitialize and then reinstall all my operating systems.
Well, I understand there are several types of artificial women.
Maybe you should look into that.
Dude, there's so many cool things
We could be doing tonight. Look.
At the glendale galleria,
"Put on your best zoot suit
（40年代流行爵士音乐迷所穿上衣过膝 宽肩 裤子肥大裤口狭窄的服装）
"It's a salute to swing music in the center court near macy's.
A salute to zoot.
Sounds like a hoot.
I have no desire to salute any article of clothing tonight.
Much less one that's linked to race riots in the 1940s.
The zoot suit riots.
I always thought that was some sort of after-christmas sale.
Well, then why don't we just go to the galleria and walk around?
But I don't need anything at the galleria.
Do you need anything at the galleria?
No. We would just walk around and see what's what.
That's a semantically null sentence.
Okay, well, how about this?
From the university web site:
7 p.M To 10:00 p.M., Norton hall multipurpose room,
"Mixer for grad student and faculty
of the science and humanities departments.
"Whether you split atoms or infinitives,
This is the place to be."
Well, that's certainly amusing, but...
I have no interest.
Come on, Sheldon,
The world is filled with people doing things outside.
Outside is so good, why has mankind spent thousands of years
Trying to perfect inside?
I don't know, it's a marketing scheme.
Please, Sheldon, I'm a young,
拜托 谢尔顿 我是个年轻的
Virile visitor from a foreign land
And I need to strut my stuff.
Let me offer you a compromise.
Sometimes when I feel stifled and want a change of scenery,
I use my imagination.
One of my favorite places
To visit is the two dimensional world
Described in Edwin Abbott's mathematal fantasy,
I don't want to go to flatland.
You're only saying that becae you haven't been there.
I am now a hexagon in two-dimensional space
And can only perceive the edges of other objects.
Is that you, Raj?
I don't recognize your edge.
Sheldon, I'm begging you.
I want to go to this mixer, and I don't want to go alone.
Well, you're in luck.
There's a mixer here in flatland
Oh, look, the's a sexually attractive line segment
You should chat her up.
- What? - Tell her you're a circle.
Flatland gals are all hot for circles.
I hope you're hungry, beadette.
We're going to a terrific restaurant.
Oh, yeah, I'm starved.
When you spend all day in a bio-lab,
Watching flesh-eating bacteria skeletonize small rodents,
It really works up an appetite.
And yet, I still want to kiss this woman.
What does that tell you?
That you'd be willing to die a horrible death
On the off-chance you'd get to second base?
Oh, we're way past second base.
Well, we kind of disagree
About what the bases are.
How's your work going, penny?
Any acting jobs?
Well, the last big thing I did was this production
Of Diary of Anne Frank above a bowling alley.
But I think things might be turning around pretty soon.
Great. How come?
Well, promise you won't make fun of me.
Of course, I would never make fun of you.
Well, I went to this psychic who told me that if I cut my hair,
I'm going to get a national commercial.
You're getting career advice from a psychic?
Good job not making fun of her.
She's not one of those phonies, okay.
She wrote a book and has her own web site.
Oh, gee, why didn't you say so?
They don't let just anyone have a web site.
- Why are you being such a jerk? - You're surprised?
Your psychic tell you I was going to be a jerk?
Why don't you kids go ahead and chat?
We're gonna make out back here.
I'm sliding into third.
Thanks for coming with me.
Thanks for giving me
Your limited edition green lantern lantern.
Did you really have to bring it in with you?
What if evil strikes and my power ring runs low?
- Come on, let's get a drink. - I don't drink.
-来吧 我们去喝一杯 -我不喝酒
And when my wingman is carrying a green lantern lantern,
I'll have a screwdriver, please.
Don't be chintzy with the screw.
I would like a root beer float.
Sheldon, they don' have ice cream.
Well, apparently, these people and I differ greatly
On the definition of "Party."
He'll have a shirley temple.
And don't be chintzy with the shirley.
Let's check out the females.
That's professor wilkinson's wife.
She's like 80 years old.
- Isn't that the game? - No.
I'm looking for a hookup.
So, the point of this exercise is
For you to find someone to copulate with?
But ideally, yes.
And what is my function as "Wingman"?
- You help me run my game. - Okay.
What is your game?
When I lie through my teeth to a woman,
You nod and agree.
Hey, that's pretty cool.
It's a limited edition
Green lantern lantern.
My friend is looking for someone to copulate with.
- I'm Sheldon. - How do you do?
Rajesh Ramayan Koothrappali.
- Call me Raj. - Hi, Raj.
-叫我拉杰 -你好 拉杰
Where are you from?
The mysterious subcontinent of India.
- You know India? - I saw Slumdog Millionaire.
Well, I'm a slumdog astrophysicist.
I thought your father was a gynecologist.
Meet Raj and Sheldon.
- This is my friend, Martha. - Hi.
-这是我朋友 玛莎 -你们好
- Hello. - Hello.
Is that the limited edition
Green Lantern Lantern?
"In brightest day, in darkest night,
no evil shall escape my sight."
Oh, that is so awesome!
Have you chosen one to copulate with?
So, what should we talk about?
Well, we could always learn more
about why people who believe in psychics are idiots.
Oh, we don't need to talk about that anymore.
Leonard covered it pretty well in the car.
I'm sorry, but facts are facts.
Right, and if you can't understand it,
No, if it's not a fact, it's not a fact.
不 如果不是事实 那就是扯淡
Thank you for educating me.
Would you like to try some?
- Yeah, sure. - Well, the fact is,
Come on, Howard, Bernadette, you' both scientists.
霍华德 伯纳黛特 你俩都是科学家
Help me out here.
What do you think-- want to jump
right in the middle of another couple's argument?
Maybe we suld just stop talking about this.
Maybe some of us should stop talking altogether.
How is everything tonight?
You know, the best thing about being in a committed,
monogamous, mutually supportive relationship
is that even if you have different idea,
you can have a spirited debate, yet still care for,
even make love with...
I knew you were going to do that.
Doesn't make me psychic!
Attaboy, Leonard make it worse.
- Laser. - Had a great night last night.
-戴上 防镭射 -难忘一宵啊
I don't like to kiss and tell,
but somebody made it to eighth base.
What the hell is eighth base?
Seventh base with shirt off.
How'd things go with Penny?
Oh... couldn't be better.
Are we taking our relationship
frustrations out on innocent Cylons?
It's not just Cylons.
All right, I was going to try to squeeze in
a little more mocking before lunch,
but I can come back later
when you don't have a high-powered weapon.
How can I go out with a woman who believes in psychics?
Hey, I once dated a girl
who believed she was abducted by aliens.
And that didn'bother you?
It meant she was gullible and open to a little probing.
What am I supposed to,
Pretend I believe something I don't whenever I'm with Penny?
Yes, I'm sure Penny fakes all kinds of things
when she's with you.
Do me a favor-- lean or, put your head right here.
帮个忙 怎么都好 让我爆了你
Let me show you anothe way to look at this.
Here we have the universe of all women.
These are the ones
you want to sleep with.
These are the women who believe exactly what you believe.
These are the women who would be willing to sleep with you.
And right there in the little triple intersection...
is your ideal mate.
Odds are she's a short physicist with low self-esteem
who lives in a government research facility in china.
What's your point?
In order to keep hing a sexual relationship with Penny,
I have to give up everything I believe in--
my intellectual integrity, the very nature
I can't do that, Howard.
Your new girlfriend.
Ryp leet Ryp leet Ryp leet
It means "Come in."
It's taking forever to load
The new operating system on my computer.
I disinfected the kitchen and the bathroom,
And now I thought I'd learn Finnish.
"Whatever floats your bought."
Uh, listen, I got a text from that girl Abby,
And she and her friend Martha want to hang out with us again.
I don't say anything.
I merely offer you facial expression
That suggests you've gone insane
I don't get it.You had a great time.
Yes, exactly, I had a great time.
That's done; I've moved on to other things.
For example, after I learn Finnish,
I'm not going to learn Finnish again
Please, Sheldon, I'm a lost Indian boy
求你了 谢尔顿 我这个无助的印度男孩
Far from home, and I want a girlfriend
And I want her to be Abby,
And she'll only come over if she can bring Martha.
Raj, I highly doubt there is any argument you can make,
Threat you might levy, rhetorical strategy,
Supplication, or... vetoomus
That you can employ that would convince me to reconsider.
My Incredible Hulk hand signed by Stan Lee.
I've admired these for years.
So does that mean we can go with the girls again?
Hulk agree to second date with puny humans!
You can't wear the hands on the date.
Cleaning out the old dryer lint, huh?
Not only is it courteous,
It's safety smart.
Every year, 15,000 fires are caused
By accidental dryer lint ignition.
Now you're supposed to say,
"Wow, what an interesting fact.
"Come here, you crazy, nerdy guy.
I could never be mad at you."
Wow, that's all you got
After you were the most obnoxious person
On a double date that included Howard Wolowitz?
It's not right to mock what a person believes in.
Would you be willing to go to my psychic
And see what it's all about?
Would you be willing to read a book
That concisely explains how all psychics are frauds?
Okay, let's go see your psychic.
Well, yeah, one of us has to keep an open mind.
You saying I don't have an open mind?
No, n-not at all. Let me help you with this stuff.
You know, believe in ghosts, too.
- Great. - And astrology.
I know, and pyramid power and healing crystals.
Oh, no, no, no, crystals don't work.
Really, that's the line?
Psychics are real,but crystals are voodoo
Oh, voodoo's real.
You don't want t mess with voodoo.
Flatland is more than just a mathematical essay.
It is also a treatise on Victorian social
You know I had never considered that.
Wow, that's going to
Completely change my visits there.
Good night,beauty human.
Listen, they're kind of
Getting busy in the living room, and...
I was wondering if I could hang out in here for a while.
I'll sleep in leonard's room. Good night.