All right, Raj has played his phantom warlord card,
And I am going to back him up with my strangling vines.
Choke on that, sucka.
Okay, well, then I'll just cut your vines with my ruby sword.
That's right, I did it. I cut 'em.
没错 我干的 我砍了
I have a question.
Warlord beats troll, troll beats elf,
Elf beats water sprite,
And basically everything beats enchanted bunny.
Unless you have the carrot powder.
Okay, I've got another question.
When does this get fun?
Are we going to talk
Or are we going to play "mystic warriors of ka-ah"?
Just play a potion card.
You can't possibly win.
Sheldon, don't ruin the game.
How could he ruin the game?
Given the cards that have already been played,
Penny can only be holding necromancer potions,
Which are only effective against wraiths and day-walkers,
And there are no more of either left to be drawn.
The cards remaining in the undrawn stack are:
Four fire weapons, a troll, two ogres and the jewel of osiris.
四张火焰 一张巨人 两张食人怪和冥神宝石
Sheldon, that is incredible.
From your vantage point, it certainly must seem so.
Sheldon has kind of a photographic memory.
"photographic" is a misnomer.
I have an eidetic memory, as I've told you many times.
Most recently last year during lunch
On the afternoon of may seventh.
You had turkey and complained it was dry.
Well, I guess game'over.
Really? Oh, great.
- Okay, I gotta go. - Why?
Because the last me I didn't go,
I ended up playing "mystic warlords of ka."
Not "ka. Ka-ah."
Still can't believe she's going out with me.
That reminds me I have a bone to pick with you.
You and I made a pact
That if either of us ever got a hot girlfriend,
That person would have his girlfriend
Hook the other guy up with one of her girlfriends.
I don't remember that.
June 30th, 2004.
Opening day of Spider-Man 2 at the Amc Pasadena.
They only had red icees, no blue.
So you've been with Penny for like a month and a half now.
Where's my shorty, morty?
Howard, you can't hold me to that.
Because when I made that agreement,
I didn't think I'd ever have a hot girlfriend.
And I was positive you ever would.
Hey, how come I wasn't part of this deal?
You had left the refreshment stand
In order to indulge in your customary preemptive pre-show urination.
Oh, so that's how it works?
I have a teeny bladder and I don't get a hot girlfriend?
Yeah, Raj. That's how it works.
对 拉杰 就因为这个
Can I have a napkin?
But you have whole bunch of 'em.
Yes, I've moved to a four-napkin system.
Lap, hands, face and personal emergency.
分别对应腿 手 脸和个人紧急情况
If you like, starting tomorrow,
I'll add a guest napkin,
But I'm afraid there's nothing I can do for you today.
Good luck. That's the face napkin.
So, have you talked to Penny yet?
Because I've been busy,
Because I haven't figured out a way to bring it up,
And mostly-- and I can't stress how key this is--
Because I don't want to.
Leonard, pact is a pact.
You have to get Penny to fix me up.
It's not that simple.
What am I supposed to say?
"Penny, do you have any friend
You'd like to never hear from again?"
Come on, I'm smart,
I have good job and I have only three percent body fat.
I've seen him at the beach.
He's like a human chicken wing.
Fine. I'll ask if she has a friend for you.
- Right. - And tall.
I want our kids to be able to Ride Space Mountain
Before they're 20.
I'll see what I can do.
Hey, Sheldon, guess what I heard today?
I'd imagine you heard many number of things today.
When you arrived at work you undoubtedly heard, "hello, Raj.
你来上班肯定会听到 "你好 拉杰"
"How are you, Raj?"
Given that you're wearing a new sweater-vest,
And possibly, though far less likely, "nice sweater-vest."
也有可能 虽然可能性很小 听到"羊毛背心很漂亮"
Why don't I just tell you what I heard today.
That would probably save us some time.
Saturday night at the comic book store,
They're having a "Mystic Warlords of Ka-Ah" tournament.
First prize is $500.
If we team up, we'd be unstoppable.
I'm sorry, Raj, but I have no interest
对不起 拉杰 对于没有挑战性的游戏
In playing a game in which I find no challenge.
What about the money?
This is other money.
How does it differ from the money I have?
Half of it will be mine.
Do you need it to buy a less disturbing sweater-vest?
I couldn't even talk him into giving one of his freakin' napkins.
Wow, you really are a genius.
I googled how to do that.
So, listen...Have you ever made a pact with someone?
You mean like a pinky swear?
Okay, fine, like a pinky swear.
Well, in the first grade, my friend Rosie and I
Made a pact to marry Bert and Ernie.
You know, from Sesame street?
I'm familiar with Bert and Ernie.
Then we find out we both wanted Ernie.
We didn't speak again until middle school.
The heart wants what the heart wants, Leonard.
Speaking of what the heart want-
Um, a long time ago,
I made a pact with Wolowitz that kind of involves you.
Okay, I don't know where you're going with this,
But tread carefully because it may be the last conversation we ever have.
No, no, nothing like that.
不 不 不是那样的
The deal was that if either of us ever got a girlfriend,
We'd have her fix the other one up
With one of her friends.
And you thought it's a good time to bring this up right after sex?
Well, I sure as hell wasn't going to bring it up before sex.
And during, I was trying to remember what I read on google, so...
而在激情进行时 我在尽力回想在谷歌上看到的花式 所以
I'm not hooking Wolowitz up with one of my friends.
It doesn't have to be a good friend.
And you know that deep down inside, Howard's a really nice guy.
The problem isn't what's on the inside.
It's the creepy candy coating.
Will you at least think about it?
Just as a favor to me?
Oh, great thing about ernie,
Was he never asked me for anything.
Got it. Got it. Got it. Got it. Got it. Got it.
有了 有了 有了 有了 有了 有了
Betty and Veronica?
Hey, Sheldon, the new Greelantern figurine's coming in tomorrow.
Want me to set one aside for you?
You just robbed me of the opportunity to stumble upon the figurine
And make the oh-so-satisfying journey
From discovery to desire to possession.
All right, I won't set one aside for you.
But I must have it.
- Okay, I'll set one aside for you. - Thank you.
-行 那我给你留着 -谢谢
You know, I can buy all these things online.
I come here for the personal service.
Hey, Stuart, is the Wil Wheaton signed up
For the Mystic Warlords tournament
The Wil Wheaton from Star Trek?
Yeah, he lives around here. Big gamer.
Are you saying that wil wheaton aka Ensign Wesley Crusher
你是在说威尔·惠顿 也就是出演了《星际迷航: 下一代》中
On Star Trek: The next generation
Is going to be participating in your tournament?
Oh, I'm sorry, did I rob you of the opportunity to stumble onto that for yourself?
You don't understand.
Growing up, I idolizedle Wil Wheaton.
Wesley Crusher had an eidetic memory just like me.
Ooh, what a coincidence.
Maybe you can discuss with him while you're playing in the tournament.
- Sign here. - I was such a fan
That in 1995, I traveled ten hours by bus
To a sci-fi convention in Jackson, Mississippi,
Wearing my Starfleet Academy cadet uniform
In order to meet Wil Wheaton
And get him to autograph
My mint in-package Wesley Crusher action figure
Ooh, it'll be like a reunion then.
My arduous journey, however, was for naught.
Although advertised to appear, he did not show up.
It was at that moment, I vowed eternal hatred for Wil Wheaton.
Okay, great, you can tell him you hate him.
It might also interest you to know that Wil Wheaton
Currently ranks sixth on my all-time enemies list--
Right between director Joel Schumacher,
Who nearly destroyed the batman movie franchise,
And Billy Sparks,
Who lived down the street from me
And put dog poop on the handles of my bicycle.
Okay, I get it. He's a bad guy.
好的 我明白了 他是坏人
In the words of Khan Noonien Singh
In the immortal Wrath of Khan, "he tasks me."
He tasks me and I shall have him."
No doubt, sign here.
From hell's heart, I stab at thee."
All right, raj, looks like you're teamed up
好了 拉杰 看来你的队友名叫
With "die, Wil Wheaton, die."
So, tell me more about the future mother of my children.
She's adorable, howard.
I think you'll like her.
So what did you tell her about me?
Did you mention the body fat?
No, I thought that would be a nice surprise for her.
I just told her y're an aerospace engineer,
You speak five languages--
Six if you count klingon.
Girls don't count klingon, Howard.
Oh. And I told her you have
An unhealthy attachment to your mother.
Another delightful surprise for her.
Sheldon, it's your play.
My enchanted troll bludgeons your screaming harpy
With a cursed mace. Game
Say hi to your mother when she picks you up.
Or I could just tell her later tonight!
We pwned them, dude! Up top!
我们揍得他们屁滚尿流 狂顶你 伙计
Wil Wheaton, my old friend.
I have chased you 'round the moons of Nibia
And 'round the Antares Maelstrom and 'round perdition's ames!
You know, you keep quoting wrath of Khan,
But he was in next generation.
It's a totally different set of characters.
How much longer must I wait for my revenge?
Well, if Wil Wheaton and Stuart win their match
And we beat Lonely Larry and Captain Sweatpants
In the next round,
We'll face off for the championship.
So, my path to satisfaction is blocked
By Lonely Larry and Captain Sweatpants.
They must be destroyed.
Dude, you have to stop talking like that.
So, Penny tells me you're working as a waitress
To put yourself through grade school.
That's pretty great. What are you studying?
Oh, cool. So you could study me.
Microbiology is the study of tiny living things.
I know, I'm studying it.
And I said you could study me 'cause I'm a tiny living thing.
Do you like Sic-Fiction?
Like in the bedroom or like Dungeons and Dragons?
Gonna be a long night.
Well, it's your fault.
I had to ask. You didn't have to say yes.
I play my endless serpent. Raj will play ecstatic frenzy,
which means Larry will have to play Chaos Overlord.
Then Captain Sweatpants, Molten River.
I play nightshade dryad. Game, set and match.
Now fetch me Wil Wheaton!
Bot-tash bir jab-loo-di rekh kkhakkh-o ny!
Did that guy just say
"revenge is a dish best served cold" in Klingon?
What is wrong with him?
Everyone has a different theory.
How about computers?
Do you like computers?
I use them. I don't like them.
Puppets? Where do you stand on puppies?.
A puppy once bit my face.
Of course it did.
How about that? Einstein was wrong.
Approaching the speed of light
Doesn't slow down time.
Approaching them does.
Oh, damn. It's my mother.
Are you going to answer it?
She might be dying, and, you know,
I wouldn't want to miss that.
On the other hand,
If I let it go to voicemail, I could play it over and over.
I know how you feel. My mother makes me crazy.
Not as crazy as my mother makes me.
Does your mother call u every day at work
To see if you've had a healthy lunch?
My mother calls me at work
To see if I had a healthy bowel movement.
Does she lay out your clothes for you in the morning
Like you're nine years old?
You live with your mother?
No. That's the sad part.
Okay, check this out.
My mother made me we rubber gloves to kindergarten
So I wouldn't pick up a disease from the other children.
I couldn't ride a bicle
'cause my mother was afraid I'd hit a bump and lose my virginity.
You didn't, did you?
In a Camry.
- More wine? - I'd love some.
Listen, you have to come to Shabbat dinner at my house sometime.
A catholic girl like you, wearing a big cross like that
Might just give my mother the big brain aneurysm
I've been hoping for.
Okay, but only if you come
To Sunday dinner at my house wearing a yarmulke.
Am I a matchmaker or what?
We skirmish to the death.
Problem, Wil Wheaton?
You're holding two Moderate Spell cards,
A Small Rock and a Potion of Zancor
Which will be about as much help
As an air conditioner on the ice planet Hoth.
Your only move is to play the Potion,
Lose the skirmish,
And two moves later, the game.
I think he's got me.
The year was 1995.
The place: Jackson, Mississippi.
地点是 密西西比州首府 杰克逊
Having spent ten hours on a bus,
During which I had to twice violate my personal rule
Against relieving myself on board a moving vehicle...
At the fourth annual Dixie-Trek convention
Only to find that my idol Wil Wheaton decided he had
Better things to do than to show up and sign my Action Figure.
You betrayed me, Wil Wheaton.
Now I have my revenge.
You went to the '95 Dixie-Trek?
Oh, dude, my grandmother had just died,
And I had to go to her funeral.
Your mee-maw died?
But I'm really sorry that I disappointed you.
No, no, I understand.
不 不 我能理解
Anything happened to my mee-maw,
I'd be one inconsolable moon pie.
I should clarify that statement
By explaining that she calls me "moon pie."
It'a special relationship, isn't it,
Between a boy and his grandmother?
Okay, great, everybody loves their grandmas!
Now, come on, Sheldon, finish him off!
快 谢尔顿 终结他
It's okay, Sheldon.
What are you waiting for?!
Kill Wil Wheaton!
From Hell's Heart, stab at him!
Sure you can. Do it! Do it!
I came here to defeat Wil Wheaton,
The man who destroyed my dreams.
But I can't defeat Wil Wheaton,the man who loved his mee-maw.
No! Not Enchanted Bunny!
I call my mee-maw "Nana."
And she's going be very happy
To hear that my Small Rock kills your Enchanted Bunny.
Game over, moon pie.
I-I-I don't understand.
Your grandmother's alive?
Oh, you catch on quick.
Come on, Stewie, let's get our prize money.
来吧 斯图 领奖金去