摩登家庭 第一季 Modern Family Season 1 第13集: 15%的改变 Fifteen percent

上映日期: 2,009

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧 / 家庭

导演: Jason Winer

演员: 阿芮尔·温特 / 艾德·奥尼尔 / 艾瑞克·斯通斯崔特 / 杰西·泰勒·弗格森 / 朱丽·鲍温 / 诺兰·古德 / 里克·罗德里格兹 / 萨拉·海蓝德 / 索菲娅·维加拉 / 泰·布利尔


台词
Can people change?
人会变吗
Well, that's a- that is a tough one,
这是 这是个很难回答的问题
but I would say yes. People can change.
但我认为 是的 人会变的
That's what I believe anyway, and I will till the day I die.
我坚信这点 至死不变
You do realize you're proving the exact opposite of your point?
你知道你自相矛盾了吧
See? She's changed. She used to be very supportive of me.
看 她就变了 她以前从不反驳我
Come on.
拜托
Phil!
菲尔
- Ow! Ow! Why is it so loud? - My ears are bleeding!
-怎么这么大声 -我耳朵快被吵爆了
- Why is it so loud? - I don't know! Make it stop!
-怎么这么大声 -不知道 快关掉
I just installed a sweet home theater system in the family room.
我刚刚在客厅装了一套超棒的家庭影院
The, um- the trouble is Claire struggles...
问题是克莱尔对
with technology of any kind.
任何高科技产品都一窍不通
I mean, remotes, cell phones, computers.
像是遥控器 手机 电脑
Haley, have you seen my blue-
海莉 你看到我那件蓝色
- Hey, Mrs. Dunphy. - Oh, hey, Dylan.
-你好 邓菲太太 -你好 迪兰
You know I can see you, right?
你知道我能看见你吧
No, I did not know that.
不 我还真不知道
Haley's just in the bathroom. She'll be back in just a minute.
海莉在浴室 她一会儿就回来
Thank you.
谢谢
- Where were you pointing it? - At the TV.
-你刚才把遥控器对着哪 -对着电视
This-
Honey- Uh, no. I'm sorry.
亲爱的 不 我不是在笑你
It's-It's a home theater.
不过这是 这是家庭影院
What, so I can't point it at the TV
所以呢 我看电视的时候
when I want to watch the TV?
不应该把遥控器对着电视吗
No. You point it at the receiver.
不 你应该对着接收器
What's a receiver?
什么是接收器
Okay, imagine our home theater system is a human body.
这样吧 你把家庭影院想象成人的身体
So then the receiver is the brain.
接收器就相当于大脑
- The TV is the face. - I know what part you are.
-电视就是人脸 -我知道你是哪部分
So he says to his wife, "you don't love me anymore?"
所以他对他妻子说 你不再爱我了吗
His heart- boom!
他的心脏受到了重创
Quadruple bypass. Blown a valve.
心脏搭桥手术白做了 瓣膜撕裂
- Hey! Look who it is. - Hey. There he is.
-嗨 看看这是谁 -嗨 是你啊
What a coinkydink.
好巧哟
I was just getting some flowers for Gloria
我在给歌洛莉亚买花
for babysitting Lily.
感谢她临时照顾莉莉
You want me to take 'em to her?
你想让我帮忙带给她吗
I would, but I have the most hilarious card for her at home.
谢了 但是我给她准备的爆笑卡片在家里
It's- It's a hunky Antonio Banderas type
上面是一个像安东尼奥·班德拉斯那样
in silk boxers.
穿着平角短裤的性感熟男
And on the inside, it says, "thank you for last noche,
里面写着 谢谢昨夜春宵一场
but I can't find my pantalones."
只是裤子寻不着
I'm not doing it justice, really.
是我说的不好
Hi. I'm Cameron.
你们好 我是卡梅隆
Oh, geez. I'm sorry. Guys, this is Cameron.
老天 抱歉 各位 这是卡梅隆
- He's a... friend of my son's. - Hey.
-他是 他是我儿子的朋友 -你好
This is, uh, Scotty, Dale, Hugo and Shorty.
这是 斯科特 达尔 雨果和小短
It's nice to meet you guys.
见到你们很高兴
You guys look like a scene out of Jersey Boys.
你们现在这样看上去像泽西男孩里的一幕
- Ay! So handsome! - Thank you.
-哎呀你看上去真帅 -谢谢
Manny, are you wearing aftershave?
曼尼 你涂了须后水吗
Yes, for my date.
是的 为了我的约会对象
This will be the first time she will ever smell me.
这将是她第一次闻到我的雄性气息
Her name is Whitney.
她叫惠特妮
I met her in an online book club.
我是在网上读书俱乐部认识她的
We both like vampire fiction...
我们都喜欢和吸血鬼有关的小说
and the romance of eternal life.
特别是他们永生的浪漫
I think it's adorable that Manny has a date.
曼尼有约会对象这件事实在是太可爱了
He even picked out the lunch menu-
他甚至选好了午餐
grilled-cheese sandwich and tomato soup.
烤起司三明治和番茄浓汤
Tomato soup because, you know, the tomato soup is like the blood.
选番茄浓汤是因为 它看上去像血
And the vampires like to eat the blood.
而吸血鬼喜欢吸血
And then he wants me to take them out for ice cream,
然后他希望我带他们出去吃冰激凌
well, because Manny likes ice cream.
因为曼尼喜欢吃冰激凌
Oh, that must be her. If this goes well,
应该是她来了 如果约会进行顺利
you don't need to stick around.
你可以提前撤了
Hi. I'm Whitney. I'm here for Manny.
你好 我是惠特妮 我是来见曼尼的
家 庭
摩 登
第一季 第十三集
See how that works?
瞧瞧这玩意儿
Sorry, sweetie. Sorry, Daddy.
久等了小甜心 久等了他爸
No, it's all right.
不 没事
We were just- me and Lily were just using the time...
我和莉莉刚刚在
to figure out how to use the car's voice-command thingy.
研究这个车的声控系统怎么用
Oh. Here. Check it out. Watch.
来 瞧好了 你看
CD player. Next track.
CD播放器 下一首
- Say a command. - No.
-请讲指令 -不是吧
CD player. Next track.
CD播放器 下一首
Air conditioner on.
空调已开
Damn it.
该死的
You're worse than your sister with this kind of stuff.
你比你姐还不擅长用这些东西
It's a good thing Lily doesn't have an ejector seat.
幸好莉莉没有弹射座椅
Oh, guess what. I ran into your dad and some of his friends.
对了你知道吗 我碰到你爸和他朋友
- Oh, really? - Yeah. And get this.
-是吗 -是的 而且
He, uh- He referred to me as "a friend of my son."
他介绍我的时候 说我是你的朋友
- Seriously? - Yeah.
-真的吗 -是的
That's a little disrespectful to you.
那样有点不尊重你吧
- I wasn't offended by it. - Well- I am.
-我没有觉得自己被冒犯了 -但我有
I mean, would he refer to Phil as "a friend of Claire's"? No.
他会说菲尔是克莱尔的朋友吗 不会
I've heard him call Phil a lot worse.
我听过他说菲尔一些更不好听的
Just let it pass. I should have never said anything.
别想这件事了 就当我没说过
I'm not letting it pass. He needs to know that's not okay.
不能就这么算了 他得知道这样不对
And if he doesn't like it, he knows where he can go.
如果他不喜欢这样 他以后就别出现
- Enter destination. - Hell!
-输入目的地 -去死[地狱]
- Mexican food. - Shut up!
-墨西哥菜 -闭嘴
I came out of the closet in my mid-20s.
我是25岁左右出柜的
I had to actually come out to my dad three times...
我和我爸说了三次
before he finally acknowledged it.
他才终于接受了这个事实
I'm not sure if maybe he was hoping he heard it wrong,
我不确定他是不是希望他听错了
like I had said, "Dad, I'm gray."
比如他希望我说的是 爸 我是"童心恋"
And my parents, they always just knew.
而我的父母 他们一直都知道
My mother says labor with me took 36 hours...
我妈说她生我的时候用了36个小时
because I came out of the womb like this- "Hello!"
因为从她肚子出来时我就像这样 你好
- I gotta lay off these cannolis. - Hey, dad.
-我不该再吃煎饼卷了 -嗨 老爸
Mitchell. Hey, you guys know my son, Mitch.
米奇尔 你们认识我儿子吧 米奇
- Hey, Mitch, how they hangin'? - Hey, Mitch.
-嗨米奇 最近好吗 -嗨米奇
Hey, hey, hey. That's a great coat.
哟 哟 这件大衣不错
- Where'd you get that? - I don't know. It was a gift.
-在哪儿买的 -不知道 别人送的
Really? What is it- suede, microsuede?
真的吗 面料是小山羊皮还是仿麂皮
Some kind of lambskin? It's very soft, you know.
应该是某种小羊皮吧 摸上去很软
Thank you.
谢谢
- Uh, can I talk to you for a second? - Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-那个 我能和你谈谈吗 -没问题
- Thanks. Good seeing you. - Be right back.
-谢谢 见到你很高兴 -很快回来
What's the matter?
怎么了
Um, "a friend of my son"? That's how you introduce Cam?
你介绍小卡的时候 说他是我的朋友吗
That's why you came here?
你来这里就是为了说这个吗
Dad, it's just more than a little insulting.
爸 你也太侮辱人了
Cam and I have been together for five years.
小卡和我在一起5年了
We- We have a daughter.
我们还有一个女儿
Look at these guys.
看看这些人
They look like they came out of the 1800s.
他们看上去好像来自十九世纪
You see Hugo over there?
你看到雨果了吗
After lunch, he ordered a Sanka.
吃完午餐后 他点了一杯桑卡咖啡
[桑卡是世界上最早的去咖啡因咖啡之一]
No, they're not the ones that are uncomfortable with this. You are.
不 不是他们无法接受同性恋 是你
You've never been completely accepting of me.
你从未真正接受过我是同性恋这件事
And now that I have a family, it's getting a little old.
现在我都有家庭了 再说什么都迟了
These guys don't understand the gay thing.
这些人无法理解同性恋这码事儿
Why create an awkward situation? That's all I'm saying.
为什么要把气氛搞僵呢 我这么想而已
That's weird,
真奇怪
because your friend Shorty there- gay as they come.
因为你朋友小短就是"基味十足"的同性恋
- You gotta be kiddin'. - No.
-你在开玩笑吧 -不是
My gaydar is never wrong,
我的"基达"从没出过错
and it is pinging like we're at a bathhouse.
它现在正叮铃作响 就像在澡堂一样
What are you talking about- gay? The guy used to be married.
你知道你在说什么吗 他以前结过婚
Okay, that makes- So did Elton John,
好吧 难道那就...艾尔顿·约翰
[均为隐瞒自己同性恋身份的名人]
Merv Griffin, Cole Porter.
梅尔夫·格里芬和科尔·波特也结过婚
You know what? Listen. You couldn't be more wrong about this.
听着 你肯定搞错了
No, Dad. You could not be more wrong- about a lot of things.
不 爸爸 你才搞错过很多事情
- Good seeing you guys. - You take care, man.
-见到你们很高兴 -慢走 小伙子
- That's a great coat. - Yeah, later.
-那件大衣很不错 -好 回见
Ping!
叮铃
- Phil Dunphy. - Hey, it's me.
-菲尔·邓菲 -嗨 是我
- Hey. - Listen, I've got a bunch of moms over here...
-嗨 -听着 我这儿有很多妈妈们
who wanna watch the talent show DVD,
她们都想看选秀比赛的DVD
and I can't get the sound to work.
我调不出声音来
- Is there a picture? - Yes.
-有图像吗 -有
Be honest. Did you do that thing where you get frustrated...
说实话 你是不是像每次受挫的时候那样
and you start pressing all the buttons?
开始狂按各种按键了吧
No.
没有
I have a theory that Phil installs...
我觉得菲尔在家里
overly complicated things in the house...
装那些操作复杂的要死的东西
just so he has an excuse to talk to me like a child.
就是希望把我当小孩训
Last month, it was the thermostat.
上个月是自动调温器
The snowflake button makes it cold, cold, cold
雪花按键降降温
"Set temperature" makes it hold, hold, hold
温度设置恒恒温
The little flame makes it hot
小火苗按键升升温
This is so humiliating.
太丢人了
- I am sorry. - It's okay.
-对不起 -没事
He just seemed so mature online.
他在网上给人感觉很成熟
- How could I be so stupid? - You're not stupid.
-我怎么会这么傻 -你不傻
"Stupid" is not following your heart and taking a chance on love.
不跟着感觉抓住恋爱的机会才叫傻
I mean, what kind of 11-year-old talks like that?
你看 哪个11岁小孩能说出这样的话
Manny's an old soul.
曼尼内心很成熟
Here. Use my handkerchief.
来 手帕
You see what I mean?
你明白我的意思了吧
I'll just be alone for the rest of my life.
我会孤老终死的
- And that's okay. - No, don't say that.
-不过没关系了 -不要这样说
In my country, there's a saying that means...
在我们国家 有一句谚语是这么说的
"Love is just around the corner."
爱就在"转角"处
I come from a neighborhood with a lot of prostitutes.
我老家附近有很多妓女
Maybe for you.
也许对你来说是的
I mean, men must throw themselves at you every day.
每天都会有很多男人围着你转吧
They'II do the same for you if you just-
你也可以的 只要
Just what? Put out?
只要怎样 献身吗
No. Just-
不 只要
like, the lipstick, the hair, push-up bra. You know.
涂点唇彩 弄弄头发 穿上托文胸
What's it matter? I'm never gonna be as pretty as you.
有用吗 我永远不会变得和你一样漂亮
Ay, believe me, this takes a lot of work.
相信我 我也是下了一番功夫的
You just need to find your inner beauty.
你只是需要找到你的内在美
It's hiding beneath a mask of insecurity.
你的内在美被你的不安全感掩盖了
Okay, he's starting to freak me out.
他有点吓到我了
Manny, go play.
曼尼 自己去玩
Mitchell, how do these look to you?
米奇尔 这花看上去怎么样
- Like they're dying. - I know. Right?
-看上去像是快要谢了 -对吧
I said something to the florist. He said,
我也是这么对那个花商说的 他说
"Don't worry about it. They're gonna come back."
不要担心 它们会变好的
They're not coming back. They've crossed to the other side.
它们没有变好 它们更蔫了
- You are a funny man. - Why?
-你蛮搞笑的 -为什么
You're completely bothered by the flowers.
你能被这些花搞得心烦气躁
But when my father introduces you as "a friend of my son,"
但是我爸爸说你是我的朋友的时候
doesn't faze you in the least.
你一点儿也没有觉得困扰
Because the florist played me for a fool.
因为那个花商把我当成了一个傻子
Your dad didn't mean any harm. He's just being who he is.
你爸没有刻意伤害我 他就是那样的人
When I was back East in law school,
当我在东部的法学院上学的时候
my dad used to call me every Saturday at 6:00 p.M.,
我爸爸曾经每周六下午六点都打电话给我
before people would go out,
在大家都准备出去玩之前
just to, you know, check in, catch up.
只是为了查查勤 了解一下近况
And then, I think, the Christmas of my second year,
然后 应该是第二年的圣诞节吧
I finally got up the courage to tell him.
我终于鼓起勇气向他出柜
After that, I-I... pretty much just talked to my mom.
之后 我 我基本上只和我妈说话
Don't cry.
别哭
I'm not crying.
我没在哭
- I'm home! - We're here.
-我回家了 -我们在这儿
This is Whitney. We're giving her a makeover.
这是惠特妮 我们在打扮她
Hi. You have such a nice family...
你好 你的家人都很善良
and a really beautiful house.
你的房子也很漂亮
Thanks. You two know each other how?
谢谢 你们怎么认识的
She's my date.
她是我的约会对象
Of course she is. I'll be in here.
她当然是 我去里面歇着了
I'll be right back.
我很快就回来
I'm sorry this didn't turn out like you wanted.
对不起 这个约会和你预想的不太一样
That's okay.
没事
Probably didn't turn out how you wanted it either.
或许和你预想的也不太一样
I'll tell you what.
不如这样吧
If neither of us is with anybody in 10 years,
如果十年以后我们还都是单身
how about you and me give it a shot?
我们俩试试行吗
That's disturbing.
听着好诡异
But maybe.
不过可以试试
- How was your lunch with the boys? - Good.
-你们的午餐吃的怎么样 -很好
- Ran into Mitchell and Cam. - Ay, nice.
-还碰到了米奇尔和小卡 -不错嘛
You're not gonna believe this.
你肯定不会相信
- Mitchell says Shorty's gay. - Shorty?
-米奇尔说小短是同性恋 -小短吗
- Yeah, I believe it. - Oh, come on!
-我相信他是 -不会吧
Well, he's a great dresser, a great dancer.
你看 他穿着很讲究 跳舞也很好
That doesn't prove anything.
那些不能证明什么
He's the only one of your friends that never hits on me.
他是你朋友中唯一一个没有勾搭过我的
My friends hit on you?
我朋友勾搭过你吗
Yes, all the time, but don't worry.
是啊 经常的事儿 不过不用担心
They're a bunch of harmless old men.
他们都是老男人 造成不了什么威胁
They're my age.
他们和我一样年纪
I'm sure it's very hard on Shorty to keep a secret like that.
小短要保守这个秘密一定很难
- Jay, I think you should talk to him. - What?
-杰 我觉得你该跟他聊聊 -什么
You're the only one with a gay son.
只有你有一个同性恋儿子
I'm sure he'll appreciate opening up to you.
他一定会愿意跟你倾诉的
We're guys. We don't open up.
我们是男人 男人不倾诉
We talk about sports and cars,
我们聊运动 聊车
getting up in the middle of the night to pee.
还有半夜爬起来尿尿
I'm sure you made it very easy for Mitch to come out of the closet.
我相信米奇出柜的时候 你帮了他不少
- Yeah. - Okay. I'm gonna finish my makeover.
-是 -好吧 我去继续帮人打扮了
Because I care about people.
因为我关心别人
Because I want to help them change their lives.
我想帮别人改变他们的人生
Jay, I'm hinting that you should call your friend, okay?
杰 我在暗示你应该打电话给你朋友
- Yes. I'm getting that. - Okay, okay.
-好 我懂了 -好 好
Hey, hey! Daddy in the hizzouse!
哈喽 爸爸回到自己的领地了
Why would you do that to a brand-new, very expensive remote?
你为什么要这么对一个又新又贵的遥控器
Because I lost my temper, and it didn't work.
因为我发火了 它又不听话
Therefore, it's useless.
所以 它对我来说没用
Well, honey, when it comes to anything electronic,
亲爱的 只要碰上电子产品
you're not exactly the best student.
你绝对不是个好学生
I am very smart.
我很聪明的
I had a 4.0 in college. How about you?
我大学绩点4.0 你多少
I was almost that despite my substantial time
我也差不多 尽管我花了很多时间
commitment to cheerleading.
在啦啦队上
I thought we agreed not to bring up the cheerleading.
我们不是说好不提啦啦队这档事的吗
Cheerleading in my college was cool.
在我的大学 啦啦队员可是名流
The football players were so jealous,
橄榄球队的羡慕嫉妒恨到
they wouldn't even let me and my buddies
不让我和几个兄弟
Trevor, Scotty and Ling- go to their parties.
特雷弗 斯科特还有林参加他们的派对呢
Seriously, Claire,
说真的 克莱尔
you owe me an apology for breaking that.
砸烂了遥控器 你总得给我道声歉吧
Okay. Phil,
行 菲尔
I apologize for breaking the world's worst remote...
我很抱歉砸烂了世上最差劲的
that you bought... stupidly.
你一时糊涂而买的遥控器
Excuse me,
不好意思
but the experts at CNET.Com rated it the best remote.
它可是被科技咨询网的专家评为最佳遥控器
They gave it three and a half mice.
给了三个半鼠标呢
Wow. I have an idea. Let's invite the gang from CNET over...
我有个好主意 我们把科技网的砖家
and your old buddies from cheerleading,
还有你那些啦啦队同仁们请来
and we can have a nerd party.
开个书呆子派对吧
Ling is not a nerd.
林才不是书呆子
He built his own helicopter.
他自己造了架直升机
And if he was alive today-
如果他现在还健在
Sweet pea, let's not talk about Ling.
亲爱的 我们不说林了
It upsets you too much.
一提到他你就难过
- You know what I'm gonna do? - Hmm?
-知道我要干什么吗 -什么
I'm gonna buy a new remote- the same remote.
我要去买个一模一样的遥控器回来
And just to prove how wrong you are,
为了证明你错的有多离谱
I'm gonna teach our dumbest kid
我要在20分钟内
how to use it in 20 minutes or less.
教会我们最傻的孩子怎么用
- Who's our dumbest kid? - Luke.
-我们最傻的孩子是谁 -卢克
Luke? No, Luke understands electronics.
卢克 不行 卢克很懂电器
Haley.
海莉
- No. - Yeah, Haley.
-不 -没错 海莉
Teach Haley to use the remote, and then I'll apologize.
教会海莉怎么用 我就道歉
- Haley? - Mm-hmm.
-海莉 -没错
Come on!
拜托
Hey, Shorty, it's me.
嘿 小短 是我
I was thinking of heading over to the driving range
我打算去高尔夫球场
and hitting a few balls.
挥几杆子
You want to join me?
要不要一起
That's great, Jay. What should I wear?
好主意 杰 我该穿什么好呢
I don't know. Wear- Wear whatever you want.
我怎么知道 想穿什么穿什么
Oh, my God! Oh, God!
天啊 我的天啊
- What? - The flowers.
-怎么了 -那束花
They look so much better! This is a disaster.
看起来好多了 真是人间惨剧
You do know what "Disaster" means, right?
你知道"惨剧"是什么意思吧
You don't understand. I demanded that they come exchange them.
你不懂 我要求他们过来换一束
I got all medieval on the florist.
还对那花店狂发了顿飚
Cam, I heard you on the phone.
小卡 我听见你讲电话了
You said you were displeased, but that's hardly going medieval.
你只是说你不满意 那怎么算发飙呢
Excuse me. I said "Very displeased."
不好意思 我说的是"非常不满意"
And I used my cowboy voice, so-
用的还是我的牛仔音 所以...
What are you doing?
你在干嘛
I'm microwaving them so they look bad again.
我微波一下 花就蔫了
Well, that seems a little crazy, doesn't it?
你走火入魔了吧
Oh, no! That's the florist.
不好 是花店的人
Relax. Just take them out. I'll get the door.
淡定 把花拿出来 我去应门
He'll never know the difference.
他看不出来的
Hi. Florist.
嗨 我是花店的
- Yes. Come on in. He's over there with the flowers. - Hello.
-请进 花在他那儿呢 -你好
I don't know what happened.
我不知道发生了什么事
They just, uh, somehow lost their vigor.
这些花看起来蔫头耷脑的
- They were like this when we came home. - Cam. Cam.
-我们一到家就这样了 -小卡 小卡
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
天啊天啊
Oh, my God! Oh! Oh! Oh, my God!
我的神啊 老天啊
God, God!
老天 老天
Look at that. Two things flaming at once.
瞧瞧 我的脸也羞愧得跟火烧过一样
Damn it!
该死
- You know what the problem is. - What?
-你知道你问题在哪吗 -在哪
You're not moving your hips. They're frozen.
你没有灵活运用臀部 太僵硬了
Hips?
臀部
Yeah, your hips. They're frozen. Here, let me show you.
对 你的臀部 太僵硬了 我教你
- No, it's okay. - No, no. - Don't fight me.
-别麻烦了 -别跟我争了
All right, Shorty.
好吧 小短
Just bring the club back. Go ahead. All right?
向后挥杆 来 这样
Now turn those hips. That's it. You just gotta relax.
然后屁股转过来 没错 放松就行了
You gotta open up the stance a little bit.
两腿站开点
Spread 'em. Spread 'em.
打开 打开
That's it. If you don't relax,
就这样 如果不放松
you're never gonna get that shaft where it belongs.
你那一杆永远挥不得劲
Hey, you know what? How about a coffee?
不如我们去喝杯咖啡休息下吧
- Let's get a coffee. - Sure.
-走 喝咖啡去 -行
Now press the button labeled "Activities."
按下"功能"键
- Where is that? - It's just to the right. - To the right.
-在哪呢 -就在右侧 右侧
- And now choose "Watch DVD." - What?
-然后选择"观看DVD" -什么
Honey, you gotta focus. We've only got 20 minutes.
亲爱的 专心点 我们只有20分钟
Pretend- Pretend the mall's closing.
假装 假装商场要关门了
Dad, this is stupid.
老爸 这也太傻了
I watch TV on my computer.
我都是用电脑看电视的
Why do I have to learn this?
我干嘛要学这个
Because your mom doesn't think you can.
因为你妈觉得你学不会
Nobody can.
谁来也学不会啊
Haley, listen to me.
海莉 听我说
Listen to me.
听我说
I know this seems impossible.
我知道听起来似乎不可能
But this is for all those times
但是想想有多少次
that Mom told you she was right...
妈妈告诉你她是对的
and you knew she was wrong.
但你心里很清楚她是错的
- I'll do it. - That's my girl.
-我会尽全力 -乖女儿
You know, that guy's got a beautiful stroke.
那男的杆挥的不错
Look at his pants- no pleats. I like pants like that.
瞧瞧那裤子 一点褶都没有 我喜欢
You think I can get away with something like that?
你觉得我撑得起来那样的裤子吗
Sure. Why not?
有什么撑不起来的
Listen, Shorty, uh, we know each other a long time, right?
小短 我们是老交情了
- What, 30 years? - Yeah.
-有30年了吧 -对
And, um, I sense that you got a secret...
我感觉你心里藏了个秘密
that's maybe causing you a lot of anguish.
那个秘密让你痛苦不堪
You heard something, right?
你听说了什么 是不是
Well, I had the same situation with my son, Mitchell.
我儿子米奇尔也曾经这样
Really?
是吗
Yeah, and I didn't handle it too well either.
是 而我处理得不是很好
And, uh, I just want you to know
我只是想告诉你
that you can open up to me,
你可以随时对我敞开心扉
that I'm gonna do all I can to help you.
我会不余遗力地帮助你的
Well, I mean I-
我...
I never said this out loud before to anyone.
我从来没对任何人说过
But I guess, if I did, it would be you.
但我觉得 要说也只能是对你了
It's just that, Jay, you see, I'm, uh-
就是 杰 其实 我...
I'm-
我...
Go ahead. Yeah. Go ahead.
说出来吧 说出来吧
- I'm in debt. - Huh?
-我欠债了 -什么
I owe a bookie 20 G's, and he's a serious guy.
我向赌场庄家借了两万 他是个狠角色
And you offering to give me the dough- This is beautiful.
现在有你雪中送炭 真是太好了
- Wait a minute. You're not gay? - Gay?
-等会 你不是同性恋 -同性恋
What are you talkin' about- gay?
你说什么呢 什么同性恋
I'm not gay. Where'd you get gay?
我才不是呢 你从哪看出来的
Come on. I mean, you're always
拜托 瞧瞧你
talking about clothes and everything, right?
一天到晚不停地说衣服
My father was a tailor. I like clothes.
我父亲是个裁缝 我喜欢服饰
So what?
那又怎么样
Are you calling my father gay?
你是在说我父亲是同性恋吗
No!
不是
My father landed on Normandy
如果当年没有我父亲登陆诺曼底
to save your ass.
你还不知道在哪混呢
You know, if you weren't lending me 20 G's,
要不是看在你借我两万块的份
I'd knock you out right now.
我现在肯定揍得你满地找牙
Take a check?
支票行吗
Cash would be better.
现金更好
Haley. You ready?
海莉 准备好了吗
Let's do this.
开始吧
Turn on the TV.
打开电视
- Angela says, after he colored her hair- - Nice.
-安琪拉说他给她染完后 -很好
- It turned gray and then green. - Mute it.
-头发变灰然后又变绿了 -静音
Un-mute it.
取消禁音
Sixty-five dollars.
六十五块
- Put on a DVD. - Hairdresser
-播放DVD -理发师
Frederick Longmire denies he's responsible.
弗雷德里克·朗迈尔不承认过失
- Skip forward. - Wait.
-快进 -我看看
Okay. Back to TV.
好 回到电视
...better than that.
多好
Face!
霸气
Don't get all cocky, Phil.
别高兴得太早 菲尔
Let's see what happens to little Haley...
如果我这样的话
when I do... this.
小海莉要怎么办呢
Ho, ho, ho. Ho! Face.
霸气
Dad, wh- What do I do?
爸 我该怎么办
Don't panic. We went through this. Just- Just think.
别慌 我们练过这个的 好好想想
Give up. Give up. Admit defeat.
放弃吧 承认你们失败了
- Haley. -Okay. - Uh, let's see.
-海莉 -我想想
You put the remote on to TV mode...
先把遥控器转回电视模式
and then press "Input"...
然后按"输入"键
till you get HDMI 1 and-
直到HDMI1出现 然后
- I did it! - She did it!
-我成功了 -她成功了
Fine. You proved your point.
好吧 你们赢了
Everybody in this house is smarter than me.
这家里所有人都比我聪明
No, honey, you're missing the point.
不 亲爱的 不是这意思
I taught Haley how to use the remote in 20 minutes.
我在20分钟内就教会了海莉用遥控器
So think how fast you can learn it.
你肯定比她快多了
What's that supposed to mean?
你那话什么意思
See what I'm saying?
瞧见了吗
Mitchell, it's me!
米奇尔 是我
- Hey, Dad. - Hi.
-嗨 老爸 -嗨
I'm here to let you know your gaydar is broken.
我来是想告诉你 你的基达坏掉了
Shorty is not gay.
小短不是同性恋
No. I, uh- I knew that.
是 我知道
I made that up to mess with you for dissing Cam.
你那样对小卡我一时气不过才那样说的
What? That cost me 20,000 bucks.
什么 你让我花了两万块
What do you mean?
什么意思
I reached out to him to let him know it's okay to be gay.
我跟他说是同性恋也没关系
-Y ou did? - Yeah.
-你真这样做了 -是啊
Right after one of the stranger golf lessons of my life.
就在我人生最诡异的高尔夫球课之后
Turns out what he is is a lousy gambler,
结果他只是个赌技很烂的赌徒
and now I'm the one on the hook for it.
而现在我得为他买单
Oh, I'm so sorry.
真是太抱歉了
Then why are you smiling?
那你笑什么
I'm- I'm proud of you, Dad. And you're growing.
我真为你骄傲 爸 你成长了不少
Just-Just stop it. Please.
别说了
Don't you see how hard this is for me?
你不知道这对我来说多艰难吗
See, I used to be just like one of those guys. Now look at me.
我以前就跟他们一样 看看我现在
I got a house looks like Little Colombia.
我家就跟哥伦比亚村一样
I got a gay son and a Chinese granddaughter.
我儿子是同性恋 我还有个中国孙女
Vietnamese.
是越南
Only you would know the difference.
也只有你才知道区别
Don't worry, Dad. Not growing too much.
别急 老爸 你也没长进多少
I'm a little nervous.
我有点紧张
- Don't be. - I'm sure you look beautiful.
-别紧张 -你肯定美极了
What do you think?
你们觉得怎么样
Look at you!
看看你
Really?
真的吗
You're gonna be fighting men off with a stick.
男人会围着你转的 赶都赶不走
I don't know about that.
我可不确定
- Cameron! - Hi. Sorry for the pop over,
-卡梅隆 -抱歉没打个招呼就来了
but I just wanted to bring you these...
我只是想过来送你这个
to thank you for babysitting Lily again last night. -Oh!
感谢你昨晚帮我照顾莉莉
Gracias! You didn't need to do that.
谢谢 跟我客气啥啊
- You know I love Lily. - I know.
-我爱莉莉 -我知道
Come in. Say hello.
进来 打个招呼
Cameron, this is my new friend, Whitney.
卡梅隆 来认识一下我的新朋友惠特妮
Whitney, this is Cameron.
惠特妮 这是卡梅隆
Hello. It's nice to meet you.
你好 认识你很高兴
That is a spectacular dress.
你的裙子真是惊艳
This old thing?
这老旧玩意?
- What about her hair? - Oh, my gosh.
-看看她发型 -天啊
It's like Barbra Streisand in The Way We Were.
就跟芭芭拉·史翠珊在《往日情怀》里一样
- One of my favorites. - Me too.
-我的最爱之一 -我也是
Okay, who is reading The Forevers?
好吧 是谁在读永恒系列
I am.
是我
I am so obsessed with this whole vampire thing right now.
我最近完全迷上吸血鬼小说了
Me too.
我也是
I just met the sweetest guy named Cameron.
我刚认识了个超棒的男人 他叫卡梅隆
I think he might be the one.
我觉得他可能是我的真命天子
Can people change? I don't know.
人会改变吗 我不知道
People are who they are- give or take, yeah, 15%.
人们总是本性难移 加减个15%吧
That's how much people can change if they really want to.
如果真的想改变的话最多也就15%
- Well, I'll see you when I see you. - Yeah, thanks for-
-那有机会再见了 再见 -恩 谢谢
Haley, sweetie, wake up.
海莉 甜心 醒醒
- What? - I need you to teach me to use the TV.
-干嘛 -教教我怎么用电视吧
Now? Why can't Dad teach you?
现在 为什么不找爸爸教你
Because we're married.
因为我们是夫妇
Whether it's for themselves or for the people they love-
不管是为自己还是为了所爱的人改变
That way. Yeah.
那个 对
- And then press- - Mmm! I got it.
-然后按 -我知道了
Yeah. Yeah, 15%.
恩 15%
- But you know what? - I did it!
-但是 -我成功了
- Sometimes that's just enough. - I did it!
-有时候这样就足够了 -我成功了
All right, I'll see you guys next week, huh?
行了 我们下星期见
Jay. Jay.
杰 杰
Listen, I wanna thank you for,
我想谢谢你
you know, helping me out with that jam.
帮我解了围
It was nothin'.
没什么的
No, no, no. And I got you a little present.
不不 我想送你个小礼物
- You didn't have to do that. - No, I did.
-你不必这样 -不 我已经买了
Two tickets to see the great Michael Bubly.
麦克·布雷演唱会的两张门票
The guy sings like an angel.
那家伙简直是天籁之音
He's gonna be outside at one of the amphitheaters.
他会在露天剧场外面演出
Gloria's gonna love it.
歌洛莉亚肯定爱死这个了
- No. I'm talkin' about you and me. - Oh, you and me.
-不 我是说我们俩去 -你和我
- Yeah. - Well, that's a little-
-对 -这会不会有点...
I thought maybe we could have a little picnic since it's outside.
因为是在野外 我们可以顺便野餐
You know? I'll get some nice bottle of wine, a little cheese.
我会带瓶好酒 带点奶酪
- Lay on a nice blanket. All right? - Yeah, fine.
-铺张毯子 行吗 -行
Yo, hey. I like your hair. Who does your hair? Huh?
我喜欢你的发型 谁帮你剪的
Yo, handsome. Who does your hair?
嘿 帅哥 谁帮你剪的头发