He went to wipe it away, and she said, "No. Leave it."
他走过去把它擦掉 她却说"不用 别管"
And there it lay, like a raindrop, tremulous, quivering...
on the hood of her father's beloved Aston Martin.
My car's doing that thing
where if I take my hands off the steering wheel
for more than, like, ten seconds at a time,
it starts dripping all over the rug.
This came for you.
What?! We can litter in our own front yard now?!
my boss wants me to take this new client out.
Oh, I swear to God, the last thing I need
is another crazy high-maintenance musician.
Oh, my God! I just got some video of a raccoon
running down our street with two fistfuls of Chinese food.
The Internet is gonna go bonkers for Chow Mein Raccoon.
Oh, hey, this came for you.
I know. It's trash.
- What is it? - My father's ashes.
Oh, hey, guys, sorry, I-I don't have my pot card yet, so...
抱歉 我还没办医用大麻许可卡 所以...
"Here's Dad's ashes.
"He wanted you to have a memorial for him,
because you're rich and talk good."
- You gonna do it? - Absolutely.
I'm gonna just stop writing my book
because my father thinks I should throw him a memorial service
despite forgetting my birthdays five through 33.
Quick, let's rent the Coolhaus truck!
Jimmy, you know I'm here if you ever want to...
吉米 我就在这里 如果你想...
Have sex? Great. Let's go.
做爱吗 很好 我们去做爱吧
Okay. But I have a meeting later.
So just keep me clean from... here up.
He's interested in playing with us.
So, we're all playing?
Well, you'll be watching me and Raul playing.
And absolutely, down the line...
we could do whatever your thing is.
- Well, actually... - Yeah, down the line.
-其实... -真的 要等到将来
I don't know if I can do this.
I mean, I don't even like watching other men
put gas in my car.
- But you said! - I'm sorry. I just can't.
-你明明答应了 -抱歉 我做不到
Maybe we could get a couple's massage.
Or I saw a Groupon for boudoir photography.
I could wear a fedora.
You could be my client
whose legs go all the way down to the floor.
May I have this dance?
We still have spark.
I'd dip you, but my stitches might pop out.
Honestly, Gretchen, I never cared about publicity.
说真的 格雷琴 我从没在乎过公众舆论
I mean, I was always just Ben Folds,
regular guy from North Carolina who plays piano
and smokes a pretty decent pork shoulder.
Anyway, since I've relocated to L.A.,
I guess I have to play the game now.
So here we are.
I was half expecting you to be another high-maintenance diva.
Oh, no, you're probably thinking of Ben Kweller.
I'm so sorry, but I-I really love your music.
- No, no, no, no, I'm sorry. - It means a lot to me and my son.
-不行 不好意思 -那对我和我儿子意义重大
- Mr. Folds and I are in a... - It's okay, it's okay.
-我和弗茨先生正在... -没事 没事
Riley. And what's Riley's thing?
He's, uh, pretty into baseball.
I had no idea you were also an artist.
You're everywhere, man!
Well, maybe I'll run into you again.
You were so nice to him.
A girl once asked my client Sam for his autograph,
and he threw her crutches into traffic.
I don't know about all that, Gretchen.
I-I'm just a regular guy from North Carolina
who plays piano and smokes a pretty decent pork shoulder.
Got to say, Dad, the work is flowing
不得不说 老爸 工作很顺畅
like it's never flowed before.
"Normally, she hated to be on top.
She liked the weight of a man pressing down on her,
the liberation of not having real agency in the shameful act."
"But to be astride the man was the only way she could keep her gaze
trained on the two-way mirror."
"Because when Kitty looked into her reflection
she knew she was also meeting Simon's eyes.
Her brother's eyes."
You did not see that one coming, did you?
Okay, that's it, we're having a funeral.
好的 可以了 我们要举办葬礼
Your butt's gonna have a funeral when I'm through with it.
Jimmy, clearly you need some closure.
My therapist told me about this.
Apparently, if you don't deal with your emotional crap,
it can mess your shit up later.
we'll invite a few people over,
and then call it a day.
You have to make a speech. Ack!
The note said you talk good.
Everybody know Jimmy talk real good.
Next we have Item 7-A, which is the reading...
City Council Member Todd Winterer
initiated legislation regarding a bus accident,
but Council Member Pam O'Connel abstained.
Who recommended the purchase
of two natural gas street sweepers.
But guess who voted nay.
Now, ask yourself why.
That must be the food.
You're not the food delivery person.
Paul. What's going on?
Lindsay, I know how important this is to you, so...
琳赛 我知道这对你很重要 所以
I found the gentleman you picked out on the Web site.
We FaceTimed, and he's very nice.
He goes to Loyola Marymount.
Anything for our family.
Okay, so I don't know how this works.
Is there, like, a discussion about what's appropriate?
So what I found is that marijuana really helps me with my symptoms,
and I was just wondering
if there's some sort of form I could fill out
to make sure that it doesn't interfere with my other benefits.
You just walked into a government building
and asked if we'd be cool with you taking illegal drugs.
Maybe on your way home you can stop at the DMV
and ask if they'll let you steal some cars.
Well, pot is legal in California.
You mean the independent nation of California?
Is that the army you fought for?
The Army of California?
How'd they pay you?
Avocados and screenplays?
Wait. So are you saying
that I can't use marijuana medicinally,
even though it's legal in this state?
I said no such thing.
All I know is that...
marijuana is a Schedule 1 narcotic.
And you're asking me,
a government employee, if you can take it.
Let's call the police and ask them.
- No, they won't have... - Hey, police.
-不 不必了 -你好 警察叔叔
Which federally illegal drugs
can this guy take that will be cool with the V.A.?
They want to talk to you.
Is that your eulogy?
I've prepared a list of heckles.
Jimmy, shouldn't a eulogy be heartfelt?
All my father ever did was take the piss.
But I like the area you're in.
"Dad, I hope you truly do rest in peace?
As opposed to how you usually rest,
in a pair of urine-soaked sweatpants."
I worked with your dad at the plant.
Oh, yes, now I remember you.
You and dad used to show up at school
and heckle me during gym class.
I live in Fresno with me daughter now.
Your sisters want me to follow up with you.
Apparently, you blocked their numbers,
and they want me to tell you:
A, you're to have the funeral;
B, to make sure to scatter his ashes;
and C, don't fall into any shit.
Ah! Well, tell them:
A, we're already having a service tomorrow;
B, I will scatter his ashes, into the toilet;
第二 我会撒骨灰的 撒进茅坑里
and, C, you're grossly obese,
brush your teeth, and you're a whore
in descending chronological birth order.
I also have something I'd like to read about Ronny,
if it's okay with you.
Actually, that sounds great.
Tomorrow at 7:00. And bring something to drink.
just keep it Cotes de Provence.
And maybe some ice.
Cotes de Provence, ice.
Cotes de Provence, ice.
Well, I'm off the hook.
We'll have the wake,
that old fart will do the eulogy and bring ice.
When Raul was doing me from behind,
and I was thrusting my hips, that was so hot, right?
There's a bowl of candy and a quadcopter.
Ben? What are you doing here?
Your office said you'd recently experienced a loss.
So I wanted to bring some flowers.
And, of course, some of my famous pork shoulder.
It's just what you do.
May I ask who passed?
Oh, my boyfriend's father.
That's terrible, terrible news.
I'm incredibly close to my Papa.
Funerals are so important.
I've got my piano in the truck.
Okay, sure, that's...
incredibly generous of you.
Thank you, my love.
Can't risk another epiglottal infection.
I'll just run and swap this out.
Something is up with you two, and I don't like it.
You'd be happy, too, if you weren't so poor now.
Because you're my sister, and I love you,
I'll go sneak some spanakopitas into my purse
and give them to you later, so you can feed your baby.
Do you have any weed?
I can't afford it with this stupid budget Becca's got me on,
so I've been smoking dried banana peels.
Why don't you just get a pot card?
The V.A. says it'll mess with my benefits,
but it's, like, the only thing that helps, so...
I don't know what to do.
The doctor in me is like,
you're the patient, take what you've been prescribed,
you dumb little bitch.
Yeah, that's what I figured.
But the human in me is like,
"Smoke that ganj, yo."
Real talk? It's bullroar that you can't get a pot card.
And straight berserkered on fools.
That's an actual reason.
Like, everyone at this party
has a pot card for a dumb reason.
Gretchen said she had insomnia.
Lindsay said her back hurt.
What reason did you use?
I just said I saw a dog.
No, man. Total lie.
I didn't see a dog all day.
Well, on TV, sure.
You can't turn on a TV
without seeing, like, three or four of them shits.
Hello. Thank you all for coming to the memorial service
for my father, Ronny Overly.
His friend Freddie will do the eulogy,
we'll toast, and then you will leave.
"Ronny Overly "was not only my coworker.
"He cherished his family,
"Especially his son, Jimmy.
"I remember when "I came out to visit Jimmy.
"This was supposed to be in the third person.
"Oh, well. Ha, ha. It's me, Ronny.
好吧 哈哈 是我 罗尼
"I wrote this in pen, so I might as well keep going.
"Freddie has to read whatever I say.
"My name is Freddie,
I'm not reading that.
"I did my best to love him, but he rejected me.
"I sent him presents, I visited,
"I Facebook-requested him.
"Anyway, I forgive him.
"Please scatter my ashes
"At the home of actor Tony Shalhoub,
"Whose movie Big Night you and I attended together.
I think it's "Shalhoub."
"Your sister just told me he's a Paki.
"After the movie, you turned to me and said,
'That's what I want to do, Daddy.
'I want to tell stories.'
"And I said, 'You can do anything You want, son.'
然后我说 你想做什么都可以 儿子
"And so, you became a writer.
"Anyway, I hope you ditch that depressed girl.
"And I hope Fi is wrong about Tony Shalhoub.
"Looking at his last name now,
"It does look suspicious.
Excuse me! Excuse me. We are not done.
打扰下 打扰下 还没完事呢
First of all, he is a liar!
I begged him to take me to Big Night
so that we could bond, but instead,
he went to D3: The Mighty Ducks,
and I watched Big Night alone.
Then his movie was shorter,
he forgot that I was with him, so he left without me.
For him to claim that he was rejected after 18 years
of constant rejection on his part is crazy!
I've prepared a list of heckles for the occasion.
Uh, "Dad, fortunately, your death wasn't too much of a shock,
"爸 幸运的是 你的死亡并不怎么令人震惊
considering you already look like
someone put a Manchester jersey
on the corpse of a drowned person."
"Dad, you always were a lady killer.
"You gave all three of my sisters genes
"For alcoholism, learning disabilities and morbid obesity."
I mean, we are talking about a guy who was so narcissistic
that he wrote his own eulogy!
Freddie, when did my dad find out he was dying?
He was diagnosed some time last year.
if, uh, you're gonna Instagram this,
be sure to, uh, hashtag "BenFoldsSightings,"
"BenFoldsIsEverywhere" And "BenFoldsMovesToLA."
If you do, I'll personally tell you
what Brick is really about.
Hey, thanks for playing.
You were really great.
Ben! Ben! Over here, Ben!
本 本 看这里 本
- Over here, Ben! - Sorry.
-看这里 本 -不好意思
Not an appropriate venue, bud.
Now, I'll take some pictures with you outside later.
Wasn't that the same guy
who asked for your autograph at the ice cream place?
What?! A paparazzi and an autograph reseller?
Okay, look, I moved to L.A. a couple months ago,
好吧 听着 我是几个月前搬来洛杉矶的
and, you know, everyone was so excited when Moby moved to town.
It was like, "Moby bought that house.
Oh, and Moby opened that restaurant."
Ben Folds moved to town? Bupkis.
it's my job now.
Well, this was fun. Hey, guys,
want to hit Big Wang's or something?
Get a couple drinks in me,
I might tell you what Brick's about.
Goddamn it. How'd that get out?
Oh, shit. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
该死的 不好意思 抱歉
You know, when we had that moment in the pub,
I thought to myself, "After 33 years,
I'm finally having a real moment with my father."
Can't believe what a fool I was.
There wasn't a shred of truth in that moment.
You were lying the whole time.
You were dying, you didn't say a word.
All you had to do was say, "Hey, Jimmy,
你只需要说 "嘿 吉米
"This might be the last time I get to see you.
Is there anything you'd like to say?"
despite decades of neglecting, withholding,
I could have had a modicum of closure.
I can hear you laughing at the world "Modicum" as I speak.
I'm getting my closure right now.
You do not get to affect me anymore!