马男波杰克 第五季 BoJack Horseman Season 5 第3集: 计划性淘汰 Planned Obsolescence

上映日期: 2,018

语言: 英语

影片类型: 剧情 / 喜剧 / 动画

导演: 艾米·温弗瑞 / 安妮·沃克·法瑞尔

演员: 威尔·阿奈特 / 艾米·塞德丽丝 / 爱丽森·布里 / 亚伦·保尔 / 保罗·F·汤普金斯 / 斯蒂芬妮·比翠丝 / 周洪 / 吉恩·维尔皮克 / 拉米·马雷克


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原创翻译 双语字幕
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翻译 Lynn_宁 小酸奶
I think, the most important thing here
我觉得最重要的事
is that we're honest with each other and ourselves.
就是我们对彼此坦诚 对自己坦诚
翻译 青椒 克里斯托啊托
Do you agree?
你同意吗
Uh, yes?
同意吧
It says, here, you failed your last six health inspections.
这里说你前六次健康检查都不合格
校对 小酸奶
How are you still in business?
你怎么还在营业
I wanna say moxie? But possibly spunk.
我想说人格力量 但可能是勇气
时间轴 吃土少女 纸袋
I can't believe I fell asleep at your house.
我无法相信我在你家睡着了
These shoots are messing up my rhythm.
这些拍摄打乱了我的节奏
后期 吉吉
It's so weird waking up at 6:00 p.m.
下午6点起床真是太奇怪了
Don't worry. I'm not gonna
别担心 我是不会
make a habit of spending the night or day.
养成过夜或者一整天的习惯的
总监 小酸奶
I get it. We work together, we make sex together,
我明白 我们一起工作 一起做爱
we don't talk about feelings,
不谈感受
and yet sometimes a begrudging respect can blossom into--
有的时候强扭的瓜也
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app.YYeTs.com
人人影视官方客户端唯一下载渠道
- Nope. - "Blossoms into nothing"
-不 -"不甜"
is what I was gonna say.
我正想这么说
You cut me off, so you look stupid.
你打断了我 所以你看起来很蠢
Well, you look stupid when you sleep.
你睡觉的时候看起来才蠢
Look, I took some dumb pictures.
看 我照了些傻不拉几的照片
- All right. - Stupid. Real stupid.
-好吧 -蠢 真蠢
- You can delete some of these. - You have a weird eye.
-你可以删掉点 -你有一只奇怪的眼睛
- Obsessed much? - This is what it would look like
-着迷了吗 -如果尸体流口水的话
if corpses could drool.
就是这样
- Hi, excuse me, can I get The BoJack? - What is that?
-你好 我能来一份波杰克吗 -那是什么
It's an off-the-menu item for those in the know.
是提供给内行人的菜单上没有的东西
Obviously, I'm BoJack and I always order the BoJack sandwich.
显然我是波杰克 我总是点波杰克三明治
That's kooky.
好怪啊
Why would your name be a sandwich name?
为什么用你的名字命名三明治
Because I own this restaurant and I'm a celebrity.
因为我是这家饭店的老板 我还是个名人
So, are all sandwiches named after celebrities?
那所有的三明治都是以名人的名字命名的吗
Is chicken salad a celebrity?
鸡肉沙拉是名人吗
No, that's just a thing they put in the sandwich.
不 那只是他们放到三明治里的东西而已
That's not someone's name.
不是谁的名字
Can't it be both? My name is Pickles.
不能两者都是吗 我就叫小腌瓜啊
- What? - I'll have a burger.
-什么 -我要个汉堡
BoJack, I'm going to the can. Have fun with the waitress.
波杰克 我去厕所了 你们慢慢聊
It's me, Pickles, from before.
是我 小腌瓜 我们之前见过
- It's cool dating a celebrity. - Okay.
-和名人约会很酷 -好吧
I'm also dating a celebrity. Should we start a club?
我也在和名人约会 我们要创建个俱乐部吗
- I call vice president. - I'm not dating anyone.
-我当副总裁 -我没和任何人约会
And if I had to guess, I'd say neither are you.
如果让我猜的话 我会说你也没有
Guys in this town, especially celebrities,
城里的男人 尤其名人
are not exactly the settle-down type.
不是那种安定的人
That's why I hit the jackpot with my guy.
所以我遇到我那位可是中了大奖了
He doesn't have a problem committing.
他不怕承诺
In fact, he just got out of his third marriage.
实际上 他刚刚结束了他的第三段婚姻
A celebrity who just got divorced.
一位刚刚离婚的名人
Yeah. No way he'll break your heart.
是啊 他不会伤你的心的
Do you think Mr. Peanutbutter and I are moving too fast?
你觉得花生酱先生和我进展太快了吗
I don't know you or your relationship,
我不知道你或者你的感情
but I have been around the block a few times.
但是我经历过几次这样的情况
I was even on an ABC procedural,
甚至还上过ABC
called The Block, which aired a few times.
一个叫《套路》的节目 还播出了几次
The key is to have zero expectations,
关键就在于不抱任何期望
and then you'll never be disappointed.
这样你就不会失望
Yeah, zero expectations,
对啊 不抱期望
which also seems to be the mantra of this restaurant.
这似乎也是这家餐厅的口号
Thank you.
谢谢
马男波杰克第五季 第三集
She looks dead.
她好像死了
But I'm not a doctor, I'm a sassy cop.
但我不是个医生 我是个时髦女警
Poor girl had dreams.
可怜的姑娘曾怀揣梦想
And there's nothing more precious than dreams.
没有什么比梦想更珍贵的了
Philbert takes a drag of his cigarette,
费尔伯特抽了口烟
then kneels down to inspect the corpse.
然后跪下检查尸体
Cut!
BoJack, you said the stage directions again.
波杰克 你又把舞台说明说出来了
Sorry. My brain is kinda muddled. It's these night shoots.
抱歉 我的脑子有点乱 都是夜拍闹的
I think it works.
我觉得可以
John Philbert doesn't play by the rules.
约翰·费尔伯特就不按规矩
He says his stage directions out loud.
他把他的舞台说明大声说出来
It's confusing, which means the show is daring and smart.
很令人困惑 但这也意味着表演大胆而聪明
Hey, wanna go check out craft services?
想看看配餐吗
How could whatever you're listening to be more fun
不管你在听什么东西
than hearing me rant about the fruit spread?
怎么会比听我抱怨果酱更有趣呢
Is your rant honeydew related?
你抱怨的和哈密瓜有关吗
It's in the honeydew area,
在哈密瓜区
but the specifics are what keep it fresh each time.
但每次都有新细节 新说法
现在是什么时候
- Are you ready to go? - Yeah.
-你准备好了吗 -好了
Sorry, I didn't realize how late it got.
抱歉 我没意识到已经这么晚了
If only there was an easy way
要是有个简单的方法
to keep track of what time it is right now.
能注意到现在的时间就好了
- I'll go change. - No, keep your suit on.
-我去换衣服 -不 就穿西装吧
My parents are gonna be impressed I'm dating an executive.
我父母会因为你是高管而留下个好印象的
Cool! I've never impressed parents before.
酷 我从来没给父母留下过好印象
I believe that.
我相信
Listen, I haven't told my family I'm asexual,
我没告诉过我家人我性冷淡
so it might be best if, for tonight,
所以也许今晚最好
we just pretend we're sexually active.
我们假装我们是性活跃者
I mean, it's a family dinner.
家庭聚餐
What are the odds they're going
他们问我们的性生活的概率
to ask questions about our sexuality, right?
能有多大 对吧
Right...
对...
Right.
对啊
Yeah...
是...
Yeah.
是啊
Slow down. Slow down.
慢点 慢点
- Stop. Stop. Stop. We're here. - Mr. Peanutbutter?
-停 停 停 到了 -花生酱先生
Am I Steve Carell taking a dramatic role
我是接了《阳光小美女》里
in Little Miss Sunshine,
角色的史蒂夫·卡瑞尔
and you are the American public
而你是只知道他
that only knows him for his comedic work?
喜剧作品的美国公众吗
Because... surprise!
因为...惊喜
Oh, my God. Are you the umlaut
天啊 你就是
in Chloë Sevigny's name, right now?
科洛·塞维尼名字中的变音吗
Because I don't know why you're here, but I'm glad you are.
因为我不知道你为什么在这 但我很高兴你在
As Courteney Cox said
正如柯特妮·考克斯
when she discovered a rotting corpse in the woods
在熟女镇附近的森林发现了
near the Cougar Town set,
一具腐烂的尸体的时候说的
"Good God, I hope you're not busy."
"上帝啊 我希望你现在有空"
- What? - This is a thinker.
-什么 -这个梗要想一下
- You'll get it later. - Okay.
-你一会儿会懂的 -好吧
I have a very fun plan for tonight.
今晚有很有趣的安排
I just heard that they're going to
我听说他们打算
blow up the International Space Station.
把国际空间站炸掉
Oh, my God. Blow it up? Why?
天哪 炸掉 为什么啊
No one knows why space people do things.
太空领域的东西谁说得清楚
But I thought we could road trip out to the desert
不过我觉得我们可以去一趟沙漠
and witness the explosion in all her glory.
然后看一下爆炸有多绚丽
That sounds amazing!
听起来好棒啊
I'm so glad you're as excited as I am, and not mad at me
你这么开心真好 而且没有因为我给你
for trying to surprise you with something nice.
准备了很棒的惊喜而生气
Yeah! But... are we moving too fast?
当然 不过 我们是不是进展太快了
A wise lady, in the bathroom, told me some stuff.
我之前在厕所遇到一位女士跟我说的
Ooh, she sounds smart. Better listen.
她听起来很聪明 听她的话吧
I think her name was Hamburger.
她的名字好像叫汉堡
Maybe we should wait, some days, before going on another date.
也许我们应该等等 几天之后再约会
Okay. If that's how you feel, you stay here and do nothing,
好 既然如此 那你留在这里无所事事吧
and I'll go have this amazing,
而我一个人去享受
once-in-a-lifetime experience all by myself.
这场一辈子只能看一次的奇观
It does sound cool. I could also drive to the desert.
听起来确实很有趣 也许我会自己开车去
If we're both going, we might as well carpool.
既然我们都打算去 不如拼个车
That's smart! But just to be clear, we're slowing things down.
机智 不过说清楚一点 我们要放慢速度
It's not a date.
这不是约会
Exactly.
没错
Is this that mysterious, brown hors d'oeuvre
这是我上周在马克·麦格拉斯家
I ate at Mark McGrath's pool party, last week?
泳池派对时吃的那道开胃小菜吗
Because... oh, boy. Not a date.
因为...天 这不是约会
"滑鸡兄弟"
...and finally, Carnegie.
最后是卡耐基
Thus, concludes the two-item list of acceptable melons.
这就是两种可以接受的哈密瓜
Always with the earbuds.
总戴着耳机
What are you listening to?
你在听什么
Hey! No...
What is this?
这是什么
- This is so corny. - It's not corny.
-好老套啊 -不老套
I mean, it's technically a musical about corn,
严格来说的确是讲玉米[时髦]的音乐剧
but it's actually sophisticated.
但其实还挺有品位的
Wait a second. Are you... into musicals?
等等 难道你喜欢音乐剧吗
I sense you'll make this a thing.
我感觉你不会放过这件事了
Well, well, well, the stone-hearted cynic,
瞧一瞧看一看 铁石心肠的批判家
who thinks feelings are for suckers,
认为情感是失败者才会有的
has a secret soft spot for sappy musicals.
结果居然喜欢多愁善感的音乐剧
- Okay. - When you say, "Okay,"
-好吧 -你说"好吧"
do you mean okay like "Correct," Or okay like "OK-lahoma"?
意思是"正确"呢 还是"奥克拉荷马"
- *Oklahoma* - All right.
-*奥克拉荷马* -好吧
Step-ball-change, step-ball-change,
往后退两步 再退两步
shuffle off to Buffalo, and big finish.
张开双臂 再来个收尾姿势
BoJack, watch out!
波杰克 小心
God damn it!
该死的
Once again, my life has been worsened
我的人生再一次因为音乐剧
by a brush with musical theater.
而走向了更低的低谷
您已离开洛杉矶镇"梦工厂"您已进入圣贝纳迪诺镇"噩梦工厂"
Driver, can you put on something less romantic?
司机师傅 能放点不太浪漫的吗
I have a podcast about the space station explosion.
有个广播是关于太空站爆炸的
Oh, good idea! Nothing is less romantic than learning.
好主意 最不浪漫的就是学习了
From Girlcroosh, I'm Diane Nguyen
来自女生最赞网 我是戴安·阮
and this is the Crooshcast.
这里是最赞电台
My ex-wife has a podcast. This is probably weird for you.
我前妻有个电台 你应该会觉得尴尬吧
No, it would only be weird
不会的 如果我们在约会
if we were on a date, but we're not, so...
那才会尴尬 但这不是约会
I'm here with Laika, the first woman in space.
我今天请到了莱卡 太空第一位女性
Laika, why are we blowing up the space station?
莱卡 为什么我们要炸掉空间站
On International Space Station, everything ten years old.
在国际空间站上 一切都用了十年了
All phone chargers is for original iPhone.
手机充电器都是给第一版苹果手机用的
Hotcha! I make jokes.
开玩笑 我逗你的
But is always designed to go exploded.
但空间站的设定就是要爆炸的
Is called "Planned obsolescence."
这叫"计划性报废"
Planned obsolescence.
计划性报废
Sounds like a good description of my last marriage.
就像在描述我的上一段婚姻
- Well, that's probably enough of this. - No. Leave it on.
-听得差不多了吧 -别 放着吧
Now he's dating a girl about 20 years younger than him.
他跟在一个小他20岁的女孩交往
Honestly, she's the one I feel bad for.
说实话 我比较同情她
Why does she feel bad for me?
为什么她要同情我
We should put on something else!
我们应该换个频道听
You got it.
没问题
Coming up, we got a brand-new single from Twenty-One Pilots.
接下来 是二十一飞行员的最新单曲
Ew, back to the podcast.
还是继续听电台吧
- Todd is the president of ad sales. - Mm, look at you.
-陶德是广告销售部总监 -这么厉害
- And he went to a really good college. - I did?
-而且还上了一所好大学 -是吗
That's very impressive.
真是了不起
I'm afraid we don't know a lot about the world of big business.
不好意思 我们对大型产业并不熟悉
As I'm sure Yolanda has told you,
尤兰达应该跟你讲过
I'm but a humble, best-selling, erotic novelist
我是一名谦虚的畅销色情小说家
《腰围》《深度》作者另一力作
and my wife is a world-famous, adult, film star,
而我妻子是一名全球知名的成人影星
and Yolanda's identical twin sister, Mindy,
尤兰达的双胞胎姐姐 明迪
is a sex advice columnist.
是一名性爱建议专栏作者
Yolanda told me all of that.
尤兰达都跟我讲过
That's all really great information,
这些信息都很棒
that I was already privy to.
而且我已经提前知道了
Well, the important thing is that Yolanda is happy
重要的事情在于尤兰达很开心
and she's finally found a man, woman,
而且终于找到了一个男人 女人
or object to have sex with.
或者物品来做爱了
Todd is very accomplished at sexual intercourse.
陶德非常擅长性爱行为
Aren't you, Todd?
是吧 陶德
Yeah, I'm the best at the sex. Hooba, hooba.
是啊 我的活儿超好 "妙鸡妙鸡"
Are you trying to say "Hubba, hubba"?
你是想说"妙极妙极"吗
You know, Todd, I have a bit of a reputation, myself.
其实 陶德 我的活儿也是有口皆碑的
Okay, we should be hitting the road.
好了 我们该走了
Oh, but you must stay for erotic dessert.
你们得留下来吃色情甜点呀
You know, I saw the erotic dessert in the kitchen.
其实 我在厨房里看到了色情甜点
Who knew you could make such a realistic anus out of marzipan?
谁能想到杏仁蛋白糖能做得那么像肛门
You can thank my husband. He posed for the baker.
这要感谢我老公 他给糕点师当了模特
Wow, you know, it really puts the "Um" in "Yum."
厉害了 真的是让"好吃"多了点呻吟
I insist you spend the night and make love in my home.
我坚持邀请你们留下来在我家做爱
I can't think of a reason,
我想不出有任何理由
you wouldn't want to have sex in your parents' house.
会让你不想在你爸妈家做爱
Unless, you don't enjoy sex.
除非 性爱不能让你快乐
No! Of course we'll spend the night, and... fornicate.
不 我们当然愿意住下来 做爱
Hey, I got a suggestion for
关于你坦白的场景
that scene where you make your big confession.
我有一条小建议
- Oh, yeah? - I was thinking you could maybe confess...
-是吗 -我觉得你可以用歌曲的形式
*...in song!*
*来坦白*
Whoa, hey!
怎么了
BoJack, shut up and get in here.
波杰克 你给我闭上嘴进来
Okay, look at that! Found an emotion.
好啊 你看看 终于有情感反应了
I'm gonna tell you something very personal.
我要告诉你一件非常私人的事
When I was a little girl,
小时候
my mom took me to see A Kernel of Truth on Broadway.
我妈妈带我去百老汇看了真理之核
It wasn't a big hit.
那剧不太火
Yeah, I know. I Googled the reviews so I could mock you.
我知道 我刚谷歌了剧评来嘲讽你
That Frank Rich could be a real frank bitch, am I right?
那个弗兰克·里奇简直是弗兰克离奇 对吧
Well, I was six and it blew my mind.
但当时我才六岁 它令我神魂颠倒
I spent my childhood dreaming of,
我整个童年都在幻想
one day, getting to sing on Broadway.
有一天我能在百老汇放声歌唱
But, I guess, I wasn't good enough.
但我想我就是不够好吧
So now I get steady TV work, which is fine, and I'm fine,
所以现在我在电视台有一份稳定工作也挺好的
but I still listen to that musical
但我还是会听音乐剧
because it reminds me of a time when I was less jaded,
因为它会让我想到曾经我没有这么疲惫时
when I believed I could do anything,
还相信我有无限潜能
and that makes me feel good.
而这种想法能让我感觉好一点
Oh, my God, Gina.
天啊 吉娜
I-I didn't realize how much this musical meant to you.
我没想到音乐剧对你来说那么重要
And that... that's even funnier!
而且这样不就更有意思了吗
Oh, come on!
别这样
You know if this were reversed, you'd be giving me shit.
如果角色对调 你肯定会更狠地嘲笑我
Hey, Gina, I'm sorry. I was just teasing. I was... It was...
吉娜 我很抱歉 我只是在逗你
Gina, come out of the bathroom.
吉娜 从厕所出来
Gina? Oh, right.
吉娜 对哦
So, he make for you room, that you always have dream of,
所以他为你打造了你梦寐以求的房间
and this is why you leave? Seems like overreaction.
因为这事你就跑了 感觉有点反应过度
Oh, thank you!
谢谢你
Okay, we're gonna take a break.
好吧 先休息一会
I'm getting kinda hungry.
我有点饿了
We could stop at a restaurant, but that's kind of a date thing.
可以找家餐厅停一下 但那样好像约会似的
Well, fast food doesn't count, right?
但快餐不算吧
- Look, there's a KFC at the next exit. - Perfect.
-你看 那里有家KFC -太棒了
Welcome to KFC, which stands for Kiki's French Cuisine.
欢迎来到KFC 全称为凯琪法国菜
I'm not sure I want to wear the pajamas your dad gave me.
我不确定我喜欢你爸爸给我的这件睡衣
I'm sorry you have to deal with all this.
很抱歉 事情变成这样
Is it just me or was your sister flirting with me?
是我想多了还是你的妹妹真的在挑逗我
Ugh, when we were in high school,
我们还上高中的时候
I was still trying to figure out my sexuality,
我还在试着搞清楚自己的性取向
so, I dressed as Mindy, and tried to seduce her boyfriend.
所以我打扮成了明迪去勾引她的男朋友
I quickly realized I wasn't into it,
很快我就意识到了我不感兴趣
but Mindy found out, and now that I have a boyfriend,
但明迪发现了这件事 现在我有男朋友了
she probably wants to have sex with you
她大概想和你上个床
to get revenge. Typical sister stuff.
来报复我吧 姐妹之间都这样
I thought sisters were doing it for themselves.
我以为姐妹[修女]都是自己解决的
I mean, what does she need me for?
我的意思是 她需要我干什么呢
Todd, can you help me move some furniture?
陶德 你能帮我搬些家具吗
My husband has a hernia.
我丈夫有疝气
Yeah, no, I noticed in the marzipan.
之前看到杏仁糖的时候我就发现了
So, what, uh, furniture do you want me to--
所以 你想让我帮忙搬什么家
Oh, no! Your garment fell.
不 你的衣服滑下来了
This must be so embarrassing for you.
这肯定让你感到十分难堪吧
Just as I suspected. You're not sexual at all.
和我怀疑的一样 你根本毫无性欲
Like, heck I'm not.
废话 我当然没有了
Any ordinary man would be madly aroused
任何正常的男人肯定都会被这玉体
by the body that starred in
撩拨得神魂颠倒
every single porn version of a John Hughes movie:
它出演了约翰·休斯所有电影的黄色改编版
Sixteen Cans, Titty in Pink...
《十六只玉臀》 《红粉酥胸》
The Breakfast Chub, Homo Bone...
《勃起俱乐部》 《基佬当家》
- I gotta go. - Cum Kind of Wonderful,
-我得走了 -还有《爽不可言》
Penis Bueller Gets Off, Planes, Trains and Autoerotic-mobiles.
《春天不是上床天》 《患难见丁丁》
When the cock crows midnight,
当公鸡唱响午夜时
meet me under the old willow tree in the backyard for sex.
在后院的老柳树下等我一起来一炮
Zoinks!
溜了
Okay, quick update.
和你汇报一下新情报
Mindy wants to meet me for backyard sex at midnight,
明迪想午夜时分在后院和我来一炮
and your mother knows I'm asexual.
你妈妈知道了我是无性恋
She showed me her boobs.
她给我展示了她的大波
Please tell me you said, "Ahh-ooga!"
告诉我你回了她一句"天啊"
Oh, I didn't!
我没有
Oh, no! She'll disown me!
完了 她会和我断绝关系的
We gotta convince her you're super horny.
我们得让她相信其实你性欲十足
- How? - If Mindy told my mom
-怎么做 -如果明迪告诉我妈妈
that you made a pass at her,
你和她搞了
that would prove you're not asexual.
那就能证明你不是无性恋
Here's the plan. We'll wait until the cock crows midnight.
计划是这样 我们等到公鸡唱响午夜的时候
Who is this cock?
这公鸡到底是什么
When she's at the backyard,
当她去后院的时候
I'll sneak in her room and wear her clothes.
我就溜进她的房间穿上她的衣服
I'll pretend I'm Mindy and tell my mother you made a pass at me.
我会假扮成明迪告诉我妈妈你挑逗我
Okay, this sounds a little complicated,
好吧 这听着有点复杂
but I think I can handle exactly this amount of complication
但我觉得我能完美应对这个难度的情况
as long as things don't become one bit more complicated.
只要事情不再变得更复杂
滑鸡兄弟
Hey, I'm sorry I made fun of your dream.
抱歉 我拿你的梦想开玩笑了
It's okay. Just don't tell anyone about it.
没关系 只要你别和别人说
Good news: too late. I talked to Flip and Princess Carolyn
太迟了 我已经告诉弗利普和卡洛琳公主
about how you're into this Broadway crap...
你有多喜欢百老汇那些玩意儿了
- What? - ...and they said maybe you can sing
-什么 -然后他们说或许你可以
in the nightclub episode. Can you believe it?
在夜店那集里献唱 你能相信吗
- Oh, my God. - It's your big break, and I helped!
-我的天啊 -这是我帮你实现的一大突破
I don't want help. Why would you do that?
我不需要你帮我 你为什么要这么做
I know you don't want me doing nice things
我知道你不想让我对你太温柔
because I'm not your boyfriend,
因为我不是你男朋友
and you're a sentient wall of spikes,
而你就是一堆成精了的倒刺
but they want to hear you sing at the next break.
但他们希望等下休息的时候能听你唱两句
Here's a song!
听听这首歌
*Hell, no!*
*打死你我也不干*
Gina, this is your dream,
吉娜 这是你的梦想
and there's nothing more precious than dreams.
没有什么比梦想更珍贵了
It doesn't work that way.
事情不是这样来的
You're used to being the star,
你当大明星当习惯了
so good things always happen to you.
所以好事总会发生在你身上
I'm not the star.
我不是明星
I'm the third on the call sheet for Murder Hospital,
我在《血腥医院》和《谁请了猴子护理员》的
or Who Called the Monkey Paramedics.
通告表上才排到第三顺位
And maybe if I'm lucky, when I'm 60,
而如果我足够幸运 等我60的时候
I can get a juicy season arc on the right cable show
我能在对的节目高潮剧情里跑个龙套
where everyone goes, "Who's this 60-year-old woman?
然后大家都会惊叹"这个60岁女人是谁
She came out of nowhere." Then I win an Emmy in a movie
她从哪冒出来的" 然后我会因为
where I play Benjamin Bratt's mother.
出演了本杰明·布拉特的母亲得一座艾美奖
Gina, I know, but what I'm saying is, what if you are the star?
我懂 但我的意思是万一你就是明星呢
- I'm not. - But what if you are?
-我不是 -但万一你是呢
If you don't try, you'll never know.
你不试一下的话就永远不会知道了
You'll spend the rest of your life
你的余生都会在思考
wondering if you could have made it or not.
你是否本可以大红大紫中度过
Is that what you want? Always the Bratt's mom and never Da Brat?
这就是你想要的吗 永远演布拉特的妈妈
Okay.
好吧
- Yeah? - Yeah.
-对吧 -对吧
- Just... so I don't have to wonder, right? - Exactly.
-这样我就不会一直纠结了吧 -没错
I'm gonna go get ready. This is dumb, but thank you, BoJack.
我得准备一下 好蠢 但谢谢 波杰克
You know, this is actually really freeing.
你知道吗 这其实还挺放松的
I feel like, I can say
我觉得好像我可以随便讲
all the things I would never say on a date.
一些约会的时候不能讲的话
Like that I've never seen The Wire, and I don't think I'm gonna.
比如我从没看过《火线》而且也不打算看
Well, I'd never tell a date that I get the New York Times,
我也不会告诉约会对象我订《纽约时报》
but I only read the style section and throw the rest away.
但只读穿搭专栏 剩下的就扔了
I don't have or want children,
我没有也不想要孩子
but I silently judge every parent that I see in public.
但我会偷偷批判在公共场所见到的家长
I sleep with a chew toy from when I was a kid.
我还和小时候用的磨牙玩具一起睡
I still have feelings for Diannnne.
我对戴安还有感觉
Oh. That's much less fun than the other things.
这听着没其他那些那么有意思
Uh, listen--
听着
Let's just finish our meal and go see the explosion.
我们赶快吃完这顿饭一起去看大爆炸吧
*It's midnight!*
*现在是午夜啦*
And I'm the cock.
我就是那只公鸡
Here I come.
我来啦
Okay.
好啦
Mrs. Buenaventura!
布埃纳文图拉太太
I was trying to understand how someone could be like you,
我想试着了解一下正常人怎么会变成你这样
so I did a little research.
所以我查了点资料
Did you know a computer can do more than just find porn?
你知道电脑居然不只可以用来找黄片来看吗
I use my laptop to flatten pie dough.
我都是用电脑来压平做派的面团的
This concept of asexuality intrigues me.
无性恋这个概念激起了我的好奇心
I've grown tired of the whole world
这个世界都把我当成泄欲物品
thinking of me as a sex object.
而我倍感厌倦
For once in my life I would like to
人生中我第一次想要
have a close, intimate experience
有一次亲近私密
that has nothing to do with sex.
与性无关的体验
Asexualize me like one of your French girls, Todd.
使我像法国娃娃一样无欲无求吧 陶德
Gulp!
I can't believe he didn't show up. Only makes me want him more.
不敢相信他居然没来 这让我更想要他了
Mom, are you there? It's me, Mindy.
妈妈 你在吗 是我 明迪
You can tell because I'm dressed like a slut, as usual.
你能认出来是我因为我一如既往的像个婊子
Mindy, come down here. I have a question only you can answer.
明迪你下来 我有一个只有你能回答的问题
Oh, okay.
好吧
If you really want to be asexual,
如果你真的想变成无性恋的话
first, you have to put on every piece of clothing you own.
第一步 你需要把你所有的衣服都穿上
That's how we make sure we don't look sexy.
我们都是这样确保自己看起来不性感
So, leave me and go do that.
所以呢 离我远点 去穿衣服吧
Very well, but I'll be back to not have sex with you.
好的 但我还会回来继续不和你上床的
Ooh, I'm getting less excited just thinking about it.
一想到就觉得更不兴奋了
Hooba, hooba.
妙鸡妙鸡
I need some advice, Mindy.
我需要一点建议 明迪
That's me. I'm definitely Mindy.
问我就对了 我绝对是明迪
So you keep saying.
你一直在重复这一点
Look, I'd like to give your sister Yolanda this.
你看 我想把这个给你姐姐尤兰达
The last barrel
用你太奶奶的
of your great grandmother's secret recipe personal lubricant.
私人秘方调制出来的最后一桶润滑剂
As you know, when a Buenaventura is about to make love
如你所知 布埃纳文图拉家的人即将
for the first time in our home,
第一次在家里做爱时
we always give them a barrel of the family lube.
我们总会给他们一桶祖传润滑剂的
Uh, well...
那个
Antique lube of this purity is worth at least $100,000.
这么纯的古董润滑剂至少值十万
Ah-ooga!
天哪
Hello, baby, it's me, your girlfriend Yolanda.
你好啊宝贝 是我 你的女朋友尤兰达
I came to ravage you.
我来蹂躏你了
There's something different about you,
你有点不一样
but I can't put my finger on it.
但我说不出来是哪一点
Todd, take off your pants and get in bed.
陶德 快脱掉裤子上床
Wait. What?
等等 你说什么
My dad is about to give us very expensive lube
我爸爸马上要来给咱们送超贵的润滑剂
just for having sex in this house.
用来让我们在这间房子里做爱
And which sister are you?
你是姐妹俩中的哪一个
What the hell are you doing in here?
你来这里干什么
Todd, tell Mindy to get her ass out of here, so we can get nasty.
陶德 让明迪滚出去 我们要做点脏脏的
I'm Yolanda. Get away from my boyfriend!
我才是尤兰达 你离我男朋友远点
Don't listen to her, Todd.
别听她的 陶德
I'm clearly Yolanda because I'm dressed like a dumb loser.
很明显我是尤兰达 因为我穿的就像个废物
I'm so confused. I'm Todd, right?
我已经被搞糊涂了 我是陶德吧
Maybe, this'll clear things up.
或许这样能让状况清楚一点
Mindy's the one who's about to die!
等会死的人就是明迪
Oh, dear, I'm too late.
天啊 我来晚了
They're already having sex. They don't need the lube.
他们已经开始做爱了 他们不需要润滑剂了
That hurts!
好疼啊
Or maybe they do need the lube.
或许他们还需要润滑剂
Can't see me now, world.
世界 你看不见我了吧
Angelica, as I jizz and breathe, what the hell are you wearing?
安吉莉卡 你这穿的都是什么东西
- Oh, no! The lube! - Oh, dear!
-不 润滑剂 -天啊
That's too slippery!
这太滑了
Oh, my God!
我的天
Oh, no! Our grandma's sexily spinning in her grave.
哦不 我们的奶奶在她墓里做性感回旋呢
Todd, you gotta save the lube!
陶德 你得救救润滑剂
Just plug the hole with your erect penis!
快用你勃起的丁丁堵住那个洞
What? No.
什么 不
It's the only thing that'll fit the hole perfectly.
只有那个能完美的堵住它
There has to be another way.
肯定还有别的办法
Surely it's erect since
它肯定已经勃起了吧
you've been just having sex with my daughter,
因为你刚刚还在和我的女儿一起做爱呢
so unless you've been deceiving me,
所以除非你们一直
this whole time, in my own home,
在我自己家里骗我
there's no logical reason,
你没有什么符合逻辑的理由
for you, not to whip out your erect penis
来拒绝掏出你勃起的丁丁
and plug the damn hole!
然后给我堵住那个洞
Todd, the lube!
陶德 润滑剂
I'm gonna try my big toe. That's the penis of the foot.
我要试试我的大脚趾 这是脚的丁丁
Oh, God, be careful!
天啊 小心点
- Look out! - No! Whoa!
-小心 -不
I can't look!
我不敢看了
No!
不要啊
Before I start, just to give some context
在我开始之前 我要先交代一下背景
because the song doesn't make sense if...
因为不然这首歌的含义就没办法
Okay, so, it's 1712,
好吧 总之 时间是在1712年
and American colonist
美国殖民者
Sybilla Masters is perfecting her invention.
西比拉·马斯特斯正在完善她的发明
Can we lose the liner notes and get to the singing?
能不能省去介绍 直接开始唱歌
I'm a producer.
我是一名制片人
I can't just sit around having conversations, all day.
我不能坐在这里整天聊天
Oh, yeah, sorry. Of course.
好的 对不起 当然了
*We love our corn and we need our corn*
*我们爱我们的玉米 我们需要我们的玉米*
*But for goodness sake I could just break it in pieces*
*但是上帝啊 我可以掰成一粒一粒*
*Would it be all right If I solved our plight?*
*如果我解决困境 是否会变好*
*Maybe if I could find my old journals*
*也许如果我能找到我的旧日记*
*They'll help me to grind new kernels*
*就能帮我磨出新的谷子*
*Aw, shucks!*
*该死*
*I have the willpower to create this mill tower*
*我有决心建造这个磨坊*
*We'll be quite a pair though I'll be my own scarecrow*
*我们会在一起 尽管我是我的稻草人*
*It's not just a phase*
*这不只是形容*
*This female inventor craze*
*这疯狂的女发明家*
*If it takes years or days*
*就算要花好几天好几年*
*I'm gonna solve this maize*
*我也要解决这困境[玉米]*
*'Cause I was boooooorn*
*因为我就是*
*For the cooooooooooorn*
*为玉米而生*
I'm sorry. I'm gonna go.
对不起 我先走了
Thank you. And I'm sorry. And... I'm sorry.
谢谢 对不起 以及...对不起
Okay, I'm just gonna say it. That was weird.
好吧 我就直说了 太尴尬了
You know what, she was nervous, and--
你知道吗 她很紧张 然后...
BoJack,
波杰克
I don't know what kind of power games you two are playing,
我不知道你们俩在玩什么权力游戏
but keep it in the bedroom.
但是别闹到卧室以外
That was just mean, to her and to us.
那对她 对我们都太残忍了
No. I thought she'd be good. I was trying to do a nice thing.
不 我以为她会很棒 我是想做点好事
And I would like to be judged solely on my intentions this time.
这次要乖的话就怪我好了
Interloper! You ruined our family heirloom.
你这个不速之客毁了我们的传家宝
I'm sorryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy...
对不起起起起起
That's for trying to trick Todd
这是为你想骗陶德
into having sex with you!
和你做爱
And that's for having sex with my boyfriend in high school!
这是为你在高中和我男友做爱
I never had sex with him!
我从来没有和他做过爱
Yes, you did! The whole school knew about it.
你有 整个学校都知道了
No, I didn't.
不 我没有
I was going to, but I ran away because I'm asexuaaaaaaaaal!
我本来想做 但我逃走了 因为我性冷淡
经过了一番漫长又互相尊重的谈话
You know, it felt good to finally tell them.
终于告诉他们了感觉真好
I was surprised how cool they were with it.
我很惊讶他们竟然这么镇定
Yeah, I kind of forgot that despite our differences,
我都忘了就算我们不一样
they're family and they love me.
他们还是我的家人 他们爱我
So, I guess all that sneaking around was completely pointless.
那我猜那么鬼鬼祟祟根本没有意义了
Hey, you're right! What a silly waste of time.
你说得对 真是浪费时间
- Hey, can I ask you something? - Of course.
-我能问你点事吗 -当然了
Why did you tell your family I went to college?
你为什么要告诉你的家人上过大学
Oh, I don't know, I guess I just wanted you to seem impressive.
我不知道 我可能只是想让你看上去很棒
Impressive to who?
谁觉得很棒
Todd... To whom.
陶德 让谁觉得
- Yolanda, we need to break up. - What?
-尤兰达 分手吧 -什么
The only thing we have in common is that we're asexual.
我们唯一的共同点就是都是性冷淡
I'm sure there's a guy out there for you,
肯定还有合适你的人
whom's smart and accomplished
他既聪明又事业有成
- and whom went to college-- - And also doesn't want to have sex?
-还上过大学 -还也不想做爱吗
Yeah. Probably.
可能吧
- But what if there isn't? - Well, then let's make a deal.
-万一没有呢 -那我们约定
How about if neither of us
如果我们俩
meet anybody else by the time we're a hundred,
在100岁时都没有遇到意中人
we give this another shot?
我们就再在一起试试
When we're a hundred? I don't know.
等我们100岁 我不知道
Are you gonna steal my dentures
你会偷走我的假牙
and use them to build some sort of motorized nutcracker,
做成自动胡桃钳
but then the nutcracker's AI becomes self-aware
但是胡桃钳的人工智能察觉了
and leads all the other dentures
于是带领着其他的假牙
in the nursing home in a toothy revolt?
到疗养院进行牙齿起义吗
I wanna say no, but probably yes.
我想说不会的 但可能真的会
Well, then, I guess I'll see you when we're a hundred.
那我猜我们就一百岁时见吧
Come on, you're shivering.
拜托 你在发抖
- Please, just take the blanket. - No, I'm okay.
-盖一条毯子吧 -不 我没事
Are you the type of war dramatized in The Hunt for Red October?
你是《猎杀红色十月》中所描述的战争吗
Because you're cold.
因为你很冷哦
That one doesn't even make sense. How do you hunt a month?
这笑话完全没道理 你怎么猎杀一个月呢
I know that it was really hard to hear
我知道我在餐厅说的话
what I said in the restaurant,
可能很伤人
but... I want you to know everything about me,
但是 我希望你了解我的一切
even the hard stuff.
就算是不想为人了解的
I get it. This is a bad time for you to start a relationship.
我明白 现在不是你的开始新感情的好时机
Of course it's a bad time!
这当然不是好时机了
I just signed divorce papers.
我刚签了离婚协议书
But I can't control when I meet someone special.
但是我控制不住合适会遇到特别的人
So, what am I supposed to do,
那我该怎么做
just pretend I don't want to see you every night?
假装我没有每晚都想见你吗
But what if I'm like the space station?
但万一我就像那个空间站呢
After a while, you get bored of me
过一阵子 你腻烦我了
and replace me with someone new.
就找个新的替代我
Look, I don't know the future.
我不知道未来会怎样
This could end in heartbreak for both of us.
最后我们俩可能都会落得心碎的下场
I mean, most relationships do.
很多感情都这样
And if I'm honest, it's not usually me that gets bored.
老实说 一般腻烦的人都不是我
But I'd like to see where it goes because... I like you.
但我希望看看走下去会怎样 因为我喜欢你
And we have fun together.
我们一起很开心
And every time we see each other, I like you a little more.
我们每一次见面 我都会更喜欢你
Hey, am I Taylor swift's grudge against Katy Perry, right now?
我现在是泰勒·斯威夫特对凯蒂·派瑞的恨吗
Because even though it makes no sense,
因为就算完全没道理
I want to be held for a superlong time.
我还是想永远这样走下去
《真理之核》录音删除
- Hey, Gina. - Hi.
-吉娜 -你好
Look, I'm sorry. I thought--
我很抱歉 我以为
Hey, from now on, let's just stick to the original rules
从现在起 我们还是遵守原来的规则
- and not get in each other's business. - Yes, of course.
-不要干涉对方的事 -好的 没问题
- I'm sorry. I didn't even-- - For the record, you were right.
-对不起 我没... -顺便你说得对
If I didn't sing there, I would have spent the rest of my life
如果我没去唱 我这辈子都不会知道
not knowing if I ever could have made it or not.
我自己能不能行
Now I know. So, good.
现在我知道了 所以没事
You had a bad audition. It doesn't mean that everything--
那只是一场糟糕的试镜 不代表一切...
I said it's fine.
我说了没事
You did your good deed, so, you can feel good about yourself.
你做了好事 你可以自我感觉很良好
I'm going to bed.
我要上床了
If you want to have sex with me, you can.
如果你想做爱 可以
Otherwise, I'll see you in the morning.
不然的话就明早见吧
O-Okay.
好的