摩登家庭 第五季 Modern Family Season 5 第21集: Sleeper

上映日期: 2,013

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧 / 家庭

导演: 詹姆斯·R·巴格多纳斯

演员: 艾德·奥尼尔 / 索菲娅·维加拉 / 朱丽·鲍温 / 泰·布利尔 / 杰西·泰勒·弗格森 / 艾瑞克·斯通斯崔特 / 萨拉·海蓝德 / 诺兰·古德 / 里克·罗德里格兹 / 奥布里·安德森-埃蒙斯


台词
Yeah, honey, Mitchell helped me
没错 亲爱的 米奇尔帮我
pick up the shirt. You're gonna love it.
挑的衬衫 你会喜欢的
Oh, I wish I could pick you up some lip gloss
我也希望能帮你买唇膏
but we are already at the car.
但我们已经在车里了
Okay, bye, honey.
好吧 再见 亲爱的
Getting pretty good, huh?
弹得不错吧
Yeah, but you were always good.
是啊 你一向很厉害
I'm just glad you stuck with it.
我很高兴你坚持学下来了
Seriously?
你认真的吗
What?
怎么了
It's playing itself.
这琴自己在弹
I didn't know.
我又不知道
You honestly thought that I just became a piano virtuoso, dad?
你真的以为我突然成了钢琴大师吗 爸
You knew my whole life.
你看着我从小长到大
Have you ever seen me take a lesson?
你看过我学琴了吗
I thought maybe you were self-taught.
我以为你自学了呢
Oh, I'm sorry. You're right.
抱歉 你说得对
- Like when I taught myself to play the clarinet. - Exactly.
-就像我自学单簧管一样 -没错
I never played the clarinet.
我从没吹过单簧管
Can we drop it?
能别说了吗
Let's go get an ice cream.
我们去吃个冰淇淋吧
What about my lactose intolerance?
考虑过我乳糖不耐受吗
Oh, I'm not loving this game.
我不太喜欢这样纠缠下去
This sucks.
太糟糕了
[单核细胞增多症: 一种通过接吻传染的疾病]
My teacher gave me mononucleosis.
我老师给了我单核细胞增多症
As a parent, I feel I should ask about this.
作为父母 我觉得我有必要问清楚
Slow down. It's not like she gets that many tugs on the line.
别去阻止 她想吸引男人也不容易
It's for A.P. Bio.
是生物课作业
We have to write a report about a disease,
我们得写关于一种疾病的报告
and I got the worst one. This is a joke.
我拿到了最糟糕的题目 简直开玩笑
Actually, it's pretty serious.
其实那种病很严重
Back in college, I caught mono
上大学时 我从我室友林那里
from my roommate, Ling.
感染了单细胞增多症
Served us right for fooling around.
是我们鬼混应得的报应
Never share a flute, kids.
不要跟别人同吹一根长笛 孩子们
Hey, can you drop me off at the library?
你能载我到图书馆吗
Sorry. I'm meeting some friends at that coffee shop on lake.
抱歉 我要去湖边的咖啡馆见朋友
You mean the one next to the library?
你是说图书馆旁边那家吗
That's a library?
那是图书馆吗
I thought it was a church
我还以为那是某个
for a religion that didn't allow makeup.
不允许化妆的宗教的教堂呢
When is the washing machine gonna get fixed?
洗衣机什么时候才能修好啊
I'm wearing a swimsuit underneath my pants.
我裤子底下穿着泳裤呢
Everybody's gonna have clean clothes soon.
大家很快就能穿上干净的衣服了
The repair guy's supposed to come today
修理工应该今天早上十点
between 10:00 and 2:00.
到下午两点间过来
Oh! Honey, can you be here for that?
亲爱的 你能在家里等他吗
Can I sit around in an empty house and wait for someone?
我能坐在空荡荡的房子里等人吗
Baby, I'm a realtor.
亲爱的 我可是房产经纪人
I have a license for that.
有执照的 专门干这种事
You sure you don't mind?
你确定你不介意吗
Go. Run your errands.
去吧 忙你的吧
It'll give me a chance to get started on these dishes.
这样我正好可以开始洗这些盘子了
Oh, good. All right, come on, Luke.
很好 走吧 卢克
All right. See you guys later.
好 晚点见
Oh. More dishes than I thought.
盘子比我想象的多啊
That lasagna's gonna be a tough one.
那个千层面盘子一定很难洗
Somebody's gonna need a scrub brush.
有人需要一把硬毛刷了
Hello?
你好
What?
什么
No...way!
不...是吧
June 10, 1988.
1988年6月10日
Carla Concannon and I spent the afternoon
卡拉·康坎农和我在公共泳池里
frolicking at the public pool.
玩了一下午
Later, at her house, things got private
后来在她家里 我们开始做羞羞的事
while a 45 of Carly Simon's
那时还放着卡莉·西蒙的
"Nobody does it better" played.
《没人做得更好》的45转黑胶
It was my first time, her first time...
那是我第一次 也是她第一次...
with me.
跟我做那事儿
I always thought it'd be fun to own that 45.
我一直想要拥有那张45转黑胶唱片
When the record store finally called that morning,
当那天早上唱片店终于给我打来电话
I ran right down so I wouldn't miss the repairman.
我立马跑了过去 以免错过修理工
I had to have it.
我必须拥有那张唱片
It was the chance to relive
这是我重温
those magical 3 minutes and 42 seconds,
那神奇的3分42秒的机会
which was also the length of the song.
这也正是那首歌的长度
But then it dawned on me --
但我突然间想到
I was cheating on my wife
我心想着那些
with the red-hot memory of another woman.
跟别的女人的热烈回忆是对我老婆不忠
I could not let Claire find out.
我不能让克莱尔发现
I had to destroy the evidence.
我得销毁证据
Luckily, I'm cool under pressure.
还好 我在重压之下依然冷静
What?! No!
什么 不
When did he...?
他什么时候
Come on!
不是吧
There were a couple of snags,
尽管障碍重重
but I think I covered my tracks pretty well.
但我觉得我隐藏得很不错
家 庭
摩 登
第五季 第二十一集
I'm so sorry it took so long to get you these clothes.
很抱歉这么久才把这些衣服拿给你
I left them in the back of my car
我把它们落在车后座了
and completely forgot about them.
而且完全忘了
Sounds familiar.
听着好耳熟
I was in the pharmacy for three minutes.
我才进药店三分钟
You had a cracked window and a juice box.
车窗开了一道缝 还给你留了果汁
Let's retire that story.
别再说那件事了
Can I wear this for the family photo?
我能穿这件拍全家福吗
Oh, honey, that's adorable, but, you know,
亲爱的 这件衣服很可爱 但是
Gloria wants us in jeans and a black T-shirt --
歌洛莉亚要我们穿牛仔裤配黑T恤
Classic and casual.
经典又随性
And then maybe afterwards, we can stop by
也许拍完照后 我们可以顺便
and change the scenery in a high-school play.
去帮高中话剧表演换布景
That is a really cute dress.
这条裙子真的很可爱
Oh, yeah, thank you. Just got it yesterday.
是啊 谢谢 昨天刚买的
Really?
真的吗
It reminds me of something I gave you six months ago.
让我想起了我六个月前给你的东西
Do you ever put her in the girls' hand-me-downs?
你让她穿过二手衣服吗
- Oh, yeah. All the time. - Really?
-有啊 一直都有 -真的吗
Because if my girls' old clothes aren't to your taste,
因为如果你不喜欢我女儿们的衣服
I could always just... give them to somebody else!
我也可以...给别人啊
Okay, calm down, Claire.
冷静点 克莱尔
Your voice is getting to that pitch that disturbs our cat.
你的声音高得都快吵到我家的猫了
Oh, my God.
我的天呐
You will not believe what dad just said.
你们肯定不敢相信老爸说了什么
So, we're at the mall, right?
我们在商场里
And there's a piano there. I sit down behind it.
那里有架钢琴 我坐在旁边的椅子上
- I start... - Come on, Mitchell.
-我开始 -拜托 米奇尔
He's just not wired for compliments.
他就是不太会表扬人
I'm sure your playing was great.
我相信你一定弹得很好
I don't play the piano. I've never taken a lesson.
我根本不会弹钢琴 我从来没学过
- Are you sure? - Oh, my god.
-你确定吗 -天呐
My own family doesn't even know me.
我自己的家人都不了解我
Mitchell, please. Don't be so sensitive.
米奇尔 拜托 别这么敏感
You don't see me pitching a fit
你看我都没有因为
because Cam is too much of a snob
小卡这么势利不愿接受我们的
to use our hand-me-downs.
二手衣服而生气发火
Sn-- I'm sorry -- snob?
势 抱歉 势利
I will have you know I come from simple farm folk.
我告诉你 我来自质朴的农村家庭
There is permanent dirt underneath
手指甲里永远有在土地里
these fingernails from working the soil.
劳作时留下的泥土
Really?
真的吗
I had no idea that re-potting your orchids
我还不知道给兰花换盆
counted as "Working the soil."
也算是在土地里劳作呢
Okay, they're in soil, are--
兰花是种在土里的
You know what? I don't want to talk about this.
知道吗 我不想讨论这事了
I don't need to listen to this.
我没必要听这些
I'm gonna go out and get some air.
我要出去透透气
I know the feeling.
我知道那种感觉
Retire it. Seriously.
别再提了 真的
Does Joe look a little pale to you?
你看乔是不是有点脸色苍白
This whole country looks pale to me.
这个国家的人在我看来都脸色苍白
I think he needs a little color for tonight's photograph.
今晚就要拍照了 我觉得他脸上应该多点颜色
What do you think is the minimum age for a spray tanning?
你觉得使用美黑喷雾的最小年龄是多大
Now that Joe is here
既然乔出生了
and that his head is finally normal-shaped,
他的头也终于是正常大小了
I decided to take a new family portrait.
我决定照一张新的全家福
Hola!
好啊
How did it go at the mall?
购物怎么样
Bought a shirt, angered my son --
买了一件衬衫 惹怒了我儿子
another successful outing.
又是一次成功的外出
Ooh. I've been wanting to do this.
我一直想这样做
Quick -- what's the ring around an angel's head?
快回答 天使头上那个环是什么
- What? - Halo!
-什么 -好啊[光环]
You did the angel one!
你说了天使那个梗
Ordinarily, I'd be delighted,
一般情况下我会很高兴
but this isn't gonna be one of our fun chats.
但这次聊天不会有趣了
You mean like that time you called me
你是说像你看见小型飞船时
when you saw that blimp?
给我打电话的那次吗
It was so low, they waved back.
它飞得好低 上面的人都冲我挥手了呢
I'd done a pretty good job
我做得很好
eliminating all traces of that record,
清除了那张唱片的一切痕迹
but there was still one loose end.
但是还有一个问题
You know, earlier today,
今天早些时候
when we ran into each other on the street?
我们在街上碰见了
I didn't see you. You didn't see me.
我没看见你 你也没看见我
Okay, so you're saying
你这是说
whatever either one of us might have been doing
不管我们中的一个在干什么
will remain forever --
这将永远...
I didn't see you. You didn't see me.
我没看见你 你也没看见我
Just to be c-- hello?
说清... 喂
Jay's so cool. He gets it.
杰真酷 他明白
I didn't know what he was talking about,
我不知道他在说些什么
but I needed him to keep his trap shut.
但我得让他闭嘴
You see, lately, I may have been dabbling
最近 我可能在忙活
in something that... strong, virile men like me
像我这样强壮的爷们儿
aren't supposed to be dabbling in.
不该忙活的事
And it wouldn't exactly fit my image
这不符合我的形象
if people found out I was considering entering...
如果人们发现我打算
a certain adorable dog in a dog show.
带一只可爱的小狗参加狗展
爱心宠物狗
Gloria thought I was out getting my tires rotated.
歌洛莉亚觉得我是出去轮换车胎了
Actually, I was buying Stella a decorative show collar --
其实 我是在给斯黛拉买装饰领结
you know, just in case.
以防万一嘛
I figure if she looks beautiful,
我想着如果她看起来很漂亮
she'll feel beautiful.
就会更自信
Guess who we ran into at the library.
猜猜我们在图书馆碰上了谁
How would I know? I was here the whole time.
我怎么知道 我一直都在这里
Sanjay Patel. He's got Crohn's disease.
桑杰·帕特尔 他拿到了克罗恩氏病
- No! - I know. So lucky.
-不是吧 -就是啊 太走运了
He's totally going to win that science scholarship.
他绝对会获得科学奖学金的
He should use it to find a cure for baldness,
他该用这笔钱来治秃头
'cause that kid is 16 with a comb-over.
因为他都16岁了 还用梳发盖秃头
That's it!
就这样
I'm just gonna pick a new topic.
我得选个新主题
I want a disease that everyone in the school
我要一种学校里所有人
is going to talk about.
都会讨论的疾病
All right!
好吧
Why are you standing there?
你站在这里干什么
'Cause I missed you. I love you so much.
因为我好想你 我好爱你
Oh, wow. Love you, too.
我也爱你
How'd it go with the repair guy?
修理工修得怎么样了
The repair guy came, but I missed him.
修理工来了 但我错过了他
"Why? What were you doing?"
"为什么 你在干什么"
"Listening to a record."
"听唱片"
"What record?" "It's not important."
"什么唱片" "不重要"
"Phil!"
"菲尔"
"The soundtrack to my first sexual experience
"我第一次滚床单时的背景音乐
that I think about from time to time.
我时不时就会想起那个经历
Honey, where are you going?! Don't take the kids!"
亲爱的 你要去哪 别带走孩子们"
He didn't show up.
他没来
What?! That is so annoying!
什么 太过分了
I know. Put away your groceries.
就是啊 放下你的杂物
I'll call him and reschedule.
我打电话给他重新安排
No, no, no, no, no. You are too nice.
不行 你太善良了
I am calling.
我去打电话
I am not resting till I get to the bottom of this.
不弄清真相我绝不善罢甘休
It's no big deal.
没什么大不了的
It's not the first time I've been stood up by some guy.
这又不是我第一次被男人放鸽子了
Oh, listen to your words, Phil.
听听你自己在说什么 菲尔
Yep. Yep.
是啊 是啊
She called me a snob, Mitchell.
她说我是势利眼 米奇尔
I'm -- oh, I'm sorry if I don't rush
真抱歉 我没有热心地把莉莉
to throw Lily in every bargain-bin rag
塞进克莱尔扔给我们的
Claire tosses our way.
廉价衣服里
You're not really shedding the "Snob" tag with that.
你这样说还是很势利眼啊
Look, why don't we just put Lily
为了今晚的拍照
in one of Alex's shirts for the picture tonight?
不如我们让莉莉穿上艾丽克斯的衬衫吧
She'll see right through that.
她会看穿的
No, you're thinking of Haley's shirts.
不 你想的是海莉的衬衫
No, I mean it'll look ke we're doing it
不 我是说我们这样做看起来
just because she brought it up.
就像是因为她提到了这事
Well, I know. That's why I'm looking for a photo
我知道 所以我在找一张莉莉穿着
of Lily in a hand-me-down to show Claire,
别人的旧衣服的照片给卡莱尔看
but I-I can't seem to find one.
但我好像找不到
By the way, I'm barely in any of these.
顺便说一句 这些照片里基本都没我
Mitchell, are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting?
米奇尔 你的建议是我想的那样吗
Yes! Sometimes I feel like this family looks right past --
是啊 有时我觉得我们家不关注...
You're suggesting that we stage a photograph.
你在建议我们筹划拍一组照片
Put Lily in some hand-me-downs.
给莉莉穿上旧衣服
Make it look like it's from the past --
让照片看起来像是以前照的
Christmas, say -- just to prove Claire wrong.
比如说圣诞节 来证明克莱尔错了
Simplicity itself.
简单易行
That's not remotely what I'm saying --
那根本不是我的意思...
Mitchell, don't second-guess yourself.
米奇尔 不要怀疑自己了
It's simplicity itself.
这简单易行
Yes, once again, I would like to speak to a supervisor.
是啊 再说一次 我想和主管谈谈
Listen, if my husband said nobody came, nobody came.
如果我丈夫说没人来 那就是没人来
Dad, it's your move.
爸爸 该你走了
No, I think I should just play it cool for now.
不 我想我现在应该保持冷静
I'm so sorry.
对不起
Score!
搞定了
I got a disease that's rare and fun
我找到了一个既稀有又有趣的疾病
-- narcolepsy.
嗜睡症
The company swears that the driver was here at 10:00.
公司发誓说司机十点来过这里
They're putting him through to me right now.
他们在叫司机接我电话
I'm gonna chip away at his story.
我要驳倒他的说法
Let's see how you get out of this.
看看你怎么脱身吧
I'm thinking.
我在思考啊
It's a neurological condition
这是一种精神病
where people under extreme stress actually fall asleep.
病人会在极端压力下睡着
It's like a way for the brain to escape.
就像大脑的一种逃脱方式
I bet he was doing something he shouldn't have.
我打赌他做了什么不该做的事情
I'm just gonna let him keep talking till he makes a mistake.
我就让他一直说到露出破绽为止
Everybody makes mistakes.
每个人都会犯错
And the noose tightens.
套索收紧
Why were my headphones in the couch?
我的耳机怎么跑到沙发上去了
Oh, good. You do keep GPS logs on all your drivers.
很好 你们留有所有司机的定位记录
There's no way out.
逃不出去了
Let me just write down your name.
我先把你的名字记下来
Hey, does anybody need a receipt from Flipside Records?
谁还需要这张反面唱片店的收据吗
Damn it!
去他的
I didn't even see that!
我连这个都没看见
I see you're registered for tonight's show.
我看到你报名了今晚的表演
First one, huh?
第一个上场是吧
Yeah.
是的
I'm not sure I'm comfortable
大庭广众之下
with that whole prancing-in-a-circle thing
在一个圈里蹦蹦跳跳这种事
in front of everybody.
我觉得不太舒服
Can someone else run her through her routine?
能找别人带她完成表演吗
It has to be the owner.
必须是主人亲自带
I suppose that's the best. We have a rapport.
我想这是最好的 我俩有默契
All right. See you at 5:00.
好的 五点见
5:00.
五点
Uh, I got a family thing at 5:00.
我五点时家里有点儿事情
Do these things tend to start on time?
这种活动一般会准时开始吗
Of course. It's not a cat show.
当然了 这又不是猫咪表演
Well, I better speed it along. Come on.
好吧 我最好快去快回 走吧
I can't believe mom made me take you here.
我真不敢相信妈妈让我带你来这里
This is my only black shirt,
这是我唯一的一件黑色衬衫
and mom needs me to wash it.
妈妈让我洗干净
It's only when I see the less fortunate
只有当我看到穷人时
that I realize how lucky my clothes are.
我才意识到我的衣服有多幸运
All the machines are taken. We're gonna have to wait.
洗衣机都被占用了 我们只能等着了
Oh, I am not spending any more time
我才不要在这无聊的日光灯下
in fluorescent lighting than I have to.
浪费更多时间
You're gonna sneak your shirt in with someone else's load --
去把你的衬衫塞到别人的衣服里
Like that guy's. Go that way.
比如那个男的 走这边
I'll distract him.
我去分散他的注意力
Excuse me.
不好意思
Haley?
海莉
Oh, my god. Kevin.
我的天 凯文
It's "Keith."
我的名字是基思
You really don't remember
你真的不记得
the guy you abandoned at Coachella?
你在科切拉音乐节上抛弃的男生了吗
I didn't abandon you. I-I texted you.
我没抛弃你 我给你发信息了
That deejay put me in a trance.
那个DJ简直把我催眠了
Yeah. It's -- it's almost
是嘛 有点儿像是
like you were using me for tickets.
你为了要门票而利用我
Oh. That's crazy.
怎么可能
Can you get those again?
你还能再弄到那个票吗
Or was that just, like, a one-time thing with your uncle?
还是你叔叔只能帮那一次忙
It was a one-time thing.
只有那一次
Okay, so, good seeing you.
好吧 那么 很高兴见到你
Yeah.
好吧
- Remind me never to date you. - You wish.
-提醒我千万别跟你约会 -想得美
Please. I could totally get you.
拜托 我肯定能追到你
Like to see you try.
我倒想看你试试呢
All right, Lily, can you come in here, please?
好了 莉莉 你能过来吗
It's Christmas already?
已经到圣诞节了吗
Probably should have prepped her.
也许应该提前跟她说一声的
Okay, no, it's not actually Christmas.
行了 不 这不是真正的圣诞节
We're just gonna take a fun photo.
我们只要拍一张好玩的照片
Which I am going to be in because I am a member of the --
而且我得在照片里因为我属于这个...
Where is my stocking?
我的长筒袜呢
Oh, relax.
淡定
It's not in the shot, and neither are you.
它不在照片里 你也不在
Here -- I want you to take the picture from right over here.
拿着 你在这里拍这张照片
This way. Okay, great.
这边 行 很好
Lily, I want you to put this on
莉莉 你去换上这身衣服
and then stand in front of the tree, and we'll pop a shot off.
然后站在树前面 我们把照片一次搞定
Ooh! Look at all the pretty presents!
快看这些漂亮的礼物
Those are just empty boxes.
那些都是空盒子
You're killing me!
你要气死我了
I don't know which one it is!
我不知道是哪一个
I didn't see him put it in!
我没看见他放衣服进去
Wait! I think I found it.
等等 我想我找到了
He's coming!
他来了
What?! No!
什么 不
What are you doing?
你在干什么
Uh, I-I saw that your laundry was done,
我 我看见你的衣服洗好了
and I was gonna fold it for you to make us even
我想帮你叠好 这样我们就能把
for what you thought that I did that I didn't do.
你觉得我做了但其实我没做的事情扯平了
Even?
扯平
I held your popcorn for eight hours
我拿着你的爆米花
waiting for you to come back.
等了你八个小时
I walked all the parking areas twice,
我把整个停车场转了两遍
checked every medical tent.
查看了所有的医用帐篷
By the time I got back to my car,
等我回来的时候
it had been broken into and the battery was gone.
我的车被砸了 电池被偷走
I had to trade my festival pass
我不得不用我的音乐节门票
for a ride home in a horse trailer.
换一辆马拖车送我回家
But...
可是
Looks like someone got a concert t-shirt.
看来某人拿到音乐会的纪念衫啦
Dad, is there anything bothering you
爸爸 有什么事情让你烦心
that might be causing -- I don't know --
导致你 也许是
major psychological stress?
严重的心理压力吗
No. I've been acting normally, haven't I?
没有 我一直表现得很正常 不是吗
Did something happen earlier today?
今天早些时候发生什么了吗
Uh, nothing at all.
什么都没有
Because you seem a little tense.
因为你看上去有点儿紧张
What? No, I don't! Stop badgering me!
什么 不 我没有 不要纠缠我
I love your mom! Let's listen to some music.
我爱你妈妈 我们听音乐吧
Boy, the way you cook things up sometimes,
天啊 你有时候编故事的方式
it's a little --
有点儿...
- Dad! - What?!
-爸 -什么
You fell asleep!
你睡着了
It's like the fifth time today.
已经是今天第五次了
I think it has something to do with that guy
我觉得这跟没来修洗衣机的
not showing up to fix the washing machine.
那个人有关
Well, that's not exactly what happened.
事情不完全是这样的
You snuck out to buy
你溜出去在反面唱片店
"Nobody Does It Better" from Flipside Records,
买《没人做得更好》这首歌时
and he showed up?
他来了是吗
That's more exactly what happened.
差不多是这样了
How do you know all this?
你是怎么知道这些的
I've been watching you all day.
我观察你一整天了
I think the guilt from that has been causing you to fall asleep.
我觉得由此产生的愧疚感让你昏昏欲睡
So you know about Carla?
那你知道卡拉的事了?
I do now.
现在知道了
- Dad! - What is happening?!
-爸爸 -到底怎么回事啊
I was skeptical about the jeans and t-shirt,
我原本还对穿牛仔裤和T恤衫表示怀疑
but I like it.
但我挺喜欢的
Any chance the photographer could fire off a couple solo shots?
摄影师能给我单独照几张吗
Look at the bottom of Joe's face.
看看乔的下半边脸
What happened? Did you leave him in the sun?
怎么回事 你把他留在太阳下面了吗
No, I took him out for five minutes
没有 我带他出去呆了五分钟
to give him a little color.
好让他脸上有点颜色
I must have not closed the visor all the way down.
我肯定忘了把遮阳罩全部放下来了
Why is it so important to you that he has color?
他的肤色对你来说那么重要吗
Because we're sending this picture
因为我们要把照片
to our family in Colombia,
寄给哥伦比亚的家人
and I have a son that doesn't even look Colombian.
但我有个完全不像哥伦比亚人的儿子
Now they're gonna look at this picture,
到时候他们看到照片
and they're gonna think that I am a terrible mother,
肯定会觉得我这个当妈的不称职
that I can't even take care of my own child.
居然连自己的小孩都照顾不好
I think your reputation is set.
你的名声早就臭了
I can still do this with my arm
我现在还能做这个动作
'cause I slept in the sink till I was 3.
因为我在水池里一直睡到三岁
Ha-lo!
你好
People are here. I'll deal with Joe.
人已经来了 我来照顾乔
- Okay. - Come on, buddy.
-好吧 -来吧 小宝贝
Ohh. Come on.
起来咯
Hola. Claire is on her way.
好啊 克莱尔还在路上
Dad, you have to confess to mom.
爸 你得向妈妈坦白
Clearing your conscience is the only way to make this stop.
消除愧疚感是唯一能解救你的办法
Really?
真的吗
I hope so, or else I have to rewrite the whole end of my paper.
希望如此 不然我就得重写论文结论了
Just the two of you? Where's the rest?
怎么只有你们俩 其他人呢
I had hoped to get this picture thing wrapped up by 5:00!
我还想着五点前把照片的事解决掉呢
They're all coming separately.
他们会各自过来
Cam, do me a favor -- call Mitchell and light a fire under him.
小卡 帮个忙 打电话催一下米奇尔
I'm right here, dad.
我就在这儿呢 爸
Oh. Good. I didn't see you come in.
好吧 我没看到你进来
You opened the door for me.
是你帮我开的门
You thanked me for bringing a bottle of Chardonnay.
你还感谢我带了瓶雪当利酒过来
Doesn't sound like me.
听起来不像我
Hey, guys. We're here.
各位 我们到了
Finally. Let's do this.
终于来了 快开始吧
Luke, where's your black shirt?
卢克你的黑T恤呢
Right here. I'll get changed.
就在这儿 我去换上
All right. Shake a leg.
好吧 快一点
- Hey, sweetie. - Hi!
-你好 亲爱的 -你好
Hey, Lily, be careful.
莉莉 小心点
Don't get anything on that beautiful outfit.
别弄脏了这么漂亮的衣服
Recognize it? Look familiar?
看到没有 是不是很眼熟
Yes, I do, but I hardly think
我看到了 但我不觉得
that putting her in one of Alex's hand-me-downs
你们在我发完火之后再给她穿
proves anything after I pitched a fit.
艾丽克斯的旧衣服能证明什么
Well, first of all, I think it's really healthy
首先 我认为你敢于承认
that you do admit it was a fit.
自己发了火真的很不错
But if you need further proof,
但如果你还需要别的证明
I'm sure I could find a photograph over here.
我肯定还能找到照片
Sure. Go ahead.
没问题 找吧
No me.
没我
No me.
没我
No me.
没我
Ah. There we are.Christmas morning last year.
找到了 去年圣诞节早上
Oh, my god.
天啊
Oh, it's Alex's old pajamas!
是艾丽克斯的旧睡衣
I'm so sorry. I owe you an apology.
对不起 我该向你道歉
Sometimes I can be really --
有些时候我可能太
What's that?
那是什么
Uh, the calendar opened to december,
挂历是十二月
the half-eaten cookies for Santa Claus,
给圣诞老人的饼干被吃了一半
the nibbled-on carrots for reindeer? I don't know.
给驯鹿的胡萝卜被啃过 哪里有问题
No, that looks like last month's Vanity Fair.
那不是上个月的《名利场》杂志吗
Oh, well, you know, every month's "Young hollywood."
好莱坞的造型不就那么几种
Mm, and didn't Lily just lose that tooth?
莉莉那颗牙不是刚掉的吗
Nope, it's still there. It's just dirty.
不 牙还在 就是弄脏了
Christmas-morning chocolates.
圣诞节早晨吃的巧克力
Uh, and I am quite sure that's a reflection of Mitchell
我很确定这个是米奇尔
in the clothes he was wearing this morning.
穿着今早那套衣服的身影
Oh, yay, I finally made it into a picture.
我终于出现在照片里了
Just couldn't change, could you?
你真是本性难移啊 是吧
You are a snob.
你是个势利眼
- Okay, you know what... - You're a snob.
-你知道吗 -你是个势利眼
...it hardly takes a snob to recognize
就算不是势利眼也看得出
- the clothes you put your children in... - Snob!
-你给你的孩子们买的衣服 -势利眼
are uninspired at best.
顶多也就称得上普通
- Claire,Cam, enough! - Oh, really?!
-克莱尔 小卡 够了 -真的吗
Everybody in this family has good taste.
这家里每个人的品味都很棒
It's just different.
只不过各不相同
It's causing too many fights.
这已经引发了太多争执
That's why today I just put everybody
所以我今天才要求
in a simple T-shirt-and-jeans outfit.
大家都穿简单的T恤和牛仔裤
Mm. There's a new rule from now on --
现在开始定一条新家规
nobody gives clothes to anyone else's children.
谁也不能再给别人的小孩衣服
Well, I think that's probably for the best.
我觉得这是最好的解决方案
Thank god I don't have to spend one more of Joe's birthdays
感谢上帝乔这次生日我不用
with a funny smile on my face.
再那样尴尬地笑了
Thank you, Cam. He loves it.
谢谢你小卡 他很喜欢
Twinsies!
双胞胎哟
Okay, everybody, it's picture time.
好了 各位 要照相了
Where's Luke?
卢克呢
Right here.
在这儿呢
Honey, what are you wearing? Is that a girl's shirt?
宝贝 你穿的是什么 女生的T恤吗
I guess I grabbed the wrong one from the laundromat.
我貌似在洗衣房拿错了
If I'm being honest, I don't hate the way it fits.
不过坦白讲我不讨厌这种贴身感
It must be that guy's girlfriend's shirt.
肯定是那家伙的女友的衣服
Is it bad that that makes him
要是我说这样让对他更有兴趣了
more interesting to me?
是不是不太好
Yes. Stay away.
是的 离他远点
Don't worry about Luke. We'll stick him in the back row.
不用担心卢克 我们可以让他站到后排
Not everyone can look their best in the picture.
不是所有人都能被拍得好看的
Joe's ready.
乔准备好了
What did you do to him?
你对他做了什么
You want him to look more Colombian.
你想让他看起来更像哥伦比亚人
What's more Colombian than the Colombian flag?
没有比哥伦比亚国旗更合适的了
He's perfect.
太完美了
Not a banner day for my male heirs.
今天对我的儿子们来说不是个好日子
Claire, you're in the back.
克莱尔 你站到后面去
Phil, you're behind Claire. No rabbit ears.
菲尔 你站克莱尔后面 别乱比手势
I don't want you messing around behind Claire's back.
我不希望你在克莱尔背后玩什么花样
Cameron, Lily, come on in.
卡梅隆 莉莉 快来
It's picture time.
要照相了
Honey.
亲爱的
There's something I need to tell you.
我有点事想跟你说
Uh, you know how you can treasure
你知道人都会有一些
special moments in your past
想要珍惜的过去
that in no way diminish the special moments in your present?
但绝不会因此影响现在的幸福
Yeah, sweetheart, it's called having a memory.
没错 亲爱的 那叫做回忆
Okay, I wouldn't mind a friendlier tone as I move through this.
希望我坦白的时候你态度能好一点
What did you do?
你做了什么
Up, up, up, up, ah!
快 快 快
No, that's the wrong way, sweetheart.
走错方向了 宝贝
What fell out of Lily's pocket?
莉莉的口袋里掉了什么出来
Is that a diamond ring?
那是钻戒吗
Huh. That'll go great with your shirt.
跟你的T恤肯定很配
It looks real.
看上去是真的
It is real.
是真的
A small occlusion, but very good color.
有点小瑕疵但是颜色很正
This is Claire's.
是克莱尔的
No.
不是
Claire's got her's on.
克莱尔的戴在她手上呢
Ay, Phil, please, you cannot tell the difference
菲尔 得了吧 你完全无法区分
between this beautiful, but a small, diamond
这颗美丽但有点小的钻石
and that chunk of glass
和那一大块的玻璃仿制品
that should have made her finger fall off weeks ago.
那玩意儿几周前就该把她的手指勒断了
I feel like I am getting you in trouble.
我感觉我好像给你惹祸上身了
Picture time!
拍照啦
What's happening?
怎么回事
Okay, don't be mad.
好吧 你先别生气
Um, I lost my real ring a few months ago,
我几个月前把我的真戒指弄丢了
and I just realized it must have fallen
我刚刚才意识到那肯定是掉进了
in the box of clothes I gave to Lily.
我送给莉莉的那一箱衣服里
Why'd you take it off?
你为什么要把戒指取下来
Well, I got pulled over,
我开车被警察拦下了
and I wanted to flirt my way out of the ticket
我想跟他调调情 让他免开罚单
by pretending I was single
于是假装我是单身
And it worked, and I kind of liked it.
那方法起作用了 我还挺喜欢的
And then I felt so guilty about liking it
然后我对这种喜欢产生了深深的愧疚感
that I just wanted to erase the whole thing.
于是我想把这全部的记忆都抹除掉
So you lied?
所以你撒谎了吗
Yes. I lied. I'm sorry.
是的 我撒谎了 我很抱歉
Does that make me a terrible person?
那是不是说明我是个很糟糕的人
No, no. Are you kidding me?
不 不会 你在开玩笑吗
We've been married for a long time.
我们已经结婚很久了
Of course we're gonna have our little secrets.
我们各自都有点小秘密也是很自然的嘛
The important thing...
重要的是
...is that we know the difference
我们心里很清楚
between a harmless indulgence...
无害的放纵
and a real indiscreet--
和真正放荡的区别
Gloria?
歌洛莉亚
- Left. - Thank you.
-左边那枚 -谢谢
Okay, it's picture time!
好了 该拍照了
Everybody, hury up.
大家都快点
Get in your positions.
赶快就位
All right?
都好了吗
All right, I think that everyone is here.
很好 大家应该都到齐了
Okay, ready?
准备好了吗
And smile!
笑一个
Are you kidding me?
开什么玩笑啊
Nobody noticed I wasn't here.
没有一个人注意到我不在
What does it take with you people?!
你们是怎么回事啊
Ay, Joe, my baby, are you okay?
乔 我的宝贝 你还好吧
Yeah, yeah, maybe -- maybe that -- that's what it takes
好吧 好吧 或许只有那样
for you to pay attention to me --
你们才会注意到我
Throw a temper tantrum like -- like Joe.
像乔一样发一下脾气
I could just throw a big...temper tantrum that --
我也可以大发 雷霆
Or if I make a mess of everything and...
把一切都弄得一团糟
I feel like that was aimed at me.
我觉得你刚刚的火是冲着我发的
You want to talk about it?
你想谈谈这事吗
Or I could just play some piano.
不如我去弹弹钢琴消消火吧
So I'm in the ballpark.
看来被我猜中了
Look.
听着
If it seems sometimes like we don't notice you,
如果你有时候觉得我们没注意到你的存在
maybe that is because we are focused...
那或许是因为我们正集中心思
...on our own stupid problems,
处理我们各自愚蠢的问题
And you're so steady.
你这人向来很稳重
Oh, you mean boring.
你是说我很无趣吧
- No. - Yeah.
-不是的 -就是的
Calm.
冷静
Because you live your life
因为你是按照你想要的方式
the way you want to.
在过自己的生活
In fact, you inspired me recently.
实际上 你最近也激励了我
Oh, how so?
怎么说
Fine.
好吧
I've been going through this thing lately.
我最近经历了一些事
It all started when I noticed
一切都开始于我注意到
a group of guys in the corner in the park.
有一群男人喜欢聚在公园的角落里
And, uh, honestly, when I first found out what they were doing,
老实说 我最开始知晓他们在做什么时
I thought it was kind of weird,
我觉得那很怪
but I found I kept thinking about it.
但后来我发现我不停想着这事
And I thought I'd give it a whirl.
我觉得我该去尝试一下
Ok-- okay. Go on.
好吧 继续
I think you know where I'm going with this,
我觉得你应该能猜到接下来会怎样
but one of the older guys showed me the ropes.
但是其中一个比我年长的家伙领我进了圈
Next thing I know,
不知不觉地
I'm hanging out at that park in that corner every day
我每天都会去那个公园的那个角落
and loving it.
并且很喜欢那种感觉
But I must have also got some shame about it
但我一定对此感到有些羞耻
because it feels good
因为我在做那事儿的时候
when I'm doing it, but...
真的感觉很爽 但是
Is that me now?
那还是我吗
A guy with a show dog.
带狗表演的男人
There it is!
原来是这个啊
Okay, see, I-I knew what it wasn't.
好吧 我知道你不是去公园搞基
I just wasn't sure what it was.
我就是不知道你到底在干什么事儿
In fact, there's a show right now,
实际上 现在就有一场表演
But...ah, I'm not gonna go.
但是 我不去了
No, no. D--
不 不 爸
- I could tell this is important to you. - No.
-我可以看出来这事对你很重要 -不
You -- you should go. You should go.
你该去 你该去
I don't want to sneak out,
我不想偷溜出去
and I don't want people to know about it.
我也不想其他人知道这事儿
Dad.
A wise man once told me,
一个睿智的人曾经跟我说过
"I don't get it,
"我不理解这个
but if that's who you are,
但如果那就是真实的你
Don't you dare be ashamed of it."
千万别为此觉得羞耻"
I did handle that kind of well.
我当时对待那事的态度真是很好
Yeah, yeah, well...
是呀 是啦 好吧
And it wasn't easy.
那对我来说可不易
I just never pictured my kid a lawyer.
我从没想过我儿子会成为一名律师
It's scary to let people see the real you,
让人们见到真实的你是很可怕的一件事
even when those people are your own family.
即使是面对你最亲的家人亦是如此
But aren't they the ones we should be least worried about,
但其实我们最不该担心他们的态度
the ones who will love us without judging,
因为他们是不带偏见爱我们的人
who forgive our faults
他们会原谅我们的过错
and celebrate our imperfections?
庆祝我们的不完美
Maybe even encourage us
甚至会鼓励我们
to let our true selves shine through?
尽情展现真实的自己
Wait, wait. Hang on. Wait, wait.
等等 稍等一下
Okay.
好了
I think you look beautiful.
我觉得你看上去好漂亮
I look old.
我看上去好老
All my cousins are going to see this.
我所有的表亲都会看到的
Click the button that makes my wrinkles go away.
点击一下那个按钮 把我的皱纹都修掉
- What happened? - Nothing.
-出什么事了 -没什么
It's not nothing. You're limping!
才不是没事呢 你都成跛子了
Were you trying to do the Russian dance again?
你是不是又尝试跳俄式舞蹈来着
It was just something stupid I was trying out,
就是我在尝试的很愚蠢的举动
and I don't even know why,
我也不知道为什么这样
since it's basically impossible.
那几乎是不可能的
Gloria. Gloria! Check it out.
歌洛莉亚 歌洛莉亚 快看
Is this not the cutest thing you've ever seen?
这一定是你见过的最萌的事吧
She did that on her first try.
它第一次尝试就成功了
He loves it, too.
他也好喜欢
Oh, oh, sure. Rub it in, Joe.
算你狠 乔 继续戳我痛处吧
Attagirl!
真棒
Here she comes this way!
它往我这边来了
Now she is just showing off.
现在它就有点儿炫耀的意思了
Both way.
我也是的