摩登家庭 第六季 Modern Family Season 6 第11集: The day we almost died

上映日期: 2,014

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧 / 家庭

导演: 贝丝·麦卡锡-米勒

演员: 艾德·奥尼尔 / 索菲娅·维加拉 / 朱丽·鲍温 / 泰·布利尔 / 杰西·泰勒·弗格森 / 艾瑞克·斯通斯崔特 / 里克·罗德里格兹 / 诺兰·古德 / 萨拉·海蓝德 / 阿芮尔·温特 / 奥布里·


台词
It was an uneventful morning -- quiet.
那个早晨与往常无异 非常宁静
instead of saving every episode of "The bachelor,"
把每一集《单身汉》都保存下来
Why don't you just hit yourself
你干嘛不直接拿
on the head with a sledgehammer?!
大锤子砸你的头
Dad, turn down that song!
爸爸 音乐声调小点
* No can do *
*办不到*
The kids had a Friday off of school,
孩子们周五放假
so we picked up Manny
所以我们接上曼尼
and went to our favorite pancake place --
去我们最爱的薄饼店
Relaxing.
放松一下嘛
Mitchell, hi.
米奇尔 你好
What?!
什么
Oh, have him tell Cam
让他跟小卡说
I'll pick him up for racquetball in an hour.
我一小时后去接他打壁球
I can't even hear him it's so loud.
这么吵我根本听不见他说什么
- Can everybody just shut up?! - I hate it.
-大家都闭嘴好吗 -真讨厌
Sorry about that. Anyway...
很抱歉 总之
Hello.
你好
Hello. Is this Phil Dumpster?
你好 请问是菲尔·邓垃圾桶吗
What do you want, Gil?
干嘛 格尔
Got to be kidding me. Hang on.
没搞错吧 等等
I need you to send a gift to mom
我需要你代表我们两人
for her birthday from the both of us.
送一份生日礼物给妈妈
No, I did it last year.
不行 去年就是我送的
I know, and I need you to do it again.
我知道 但我要你再送一次
Look, I've got a conference call at 1:20.
听我说 1点20分我有个电话会议
Then Luke's tutor comes to the house,
之后卢克的家教要来家里
45 sales meeting,
45分有个销售会议
and I still got to get Alex to judo.
我还得送艾丽克斯去上柔道课
And yet you somehow found time to bitch at me.
但你还是挤出时间来找我无理取闹了
You really can have it all.
你还真是事业生活两不误啊
Honestly, just get her a stupid gift card,
说真的 随便给她买张礼品卡就行了
you big baby!
你个大号婴儿
Why does everything with him have be so dramatic?
为什么事情一碰到他就都这么麻烦
Why are we stopping?
我们为什么要停下来
家 庭
摩 登
第六季 第十一集
Hey. Oh. Perfect.
太好了
Okay, first you berate me on the phone,
你先是在电话里斥责我
Then you show up to my office and berate me in per--
现在又亲自来我办公室斥责我
Oh, w-what is this? I don't care for this.
这是什么情况 我不喜欢这样
We got in an accident.
我们出车祸了
Oh, my God!
天呐
We almost got in an accident.
我们差点出车祸了
That seems like a really important distinction.
这差很多好吗
There was this big truck,
一辆大卡车
and it barreled through a stop sign,
闯过停车标志
And it missed our car by inches.
差几英寸我们就撞上了
Oh, my God! And everyone's okay?
天呐 大家都没事吧
Yes, just very shaken up.
没事 只是都吓坏了
But, Mitchell, I am so sorry
但是 米奇尔 我真的很抱歉
that I yelled at you before.
刚才朝你大喊大叫
Look, I brought you the birthday card for mom,
我把送给老妈的生日贺卡带来了
- And you can sign it. - Okay. Thank you.
-你也签个名 -好 谢谢
"To our best friend."
给我们最好的朋友
That's a little sarcastic. It's her birthday.
有点讽刺啊 这是她的生日啊
No, I mean it.
不 我是真心的
Mitchell, I almost died.
米奇尔 我差点就死了
I want our mom to have a great birthday.
我希望给我们的老妈过个很棒的生日
Oh, and we're doing this again.
又来了
- Okay. Oh, god. - Yeah.
-好吧 天呐 -是啊
Hi. I'll be there in a sec, yeah.
你好 我一会儿就过去
Okay, my deposition got moved up.
我的取证会被提前了
That's great.
太好了
So I'll just have to move everything -- you know what?
我得把所有事情都改期
- I'm gonna eat in the car and then- - No, no, no, no, no.
-我得在车上吃饭 然后 -不不不
No, no, no. Give it, give it!
不不不 给我 给我
Do you know what I was doing right before I almost died?
你知道我差点死掉之前在做什么吗
Exactly what you're doing.
跟你现在做的一样
Humoring a relative?
纵容自己的亲人瞎胡闹吗
No, no, scheduling my life down to the last minute.
不是 我在安排我人生中的每一分钟
I mean, look at this --
你看看这个
"Call New York office -- 4:17 p.m."
下午4点17分打电话给纽约办公室
Do you realize that everybody
你有没有发现除了我们两个
but us rounds up to the nearest five minutes?
大家都以5分钟为计算时间的最小单位
Today made me realize something, Mitchell.
米奇尔 今天的事情让我意识到
No, I don't want to
我不想当那种
be a 4:17 kind of person. Do you?
按分钟规划时间的人 你呢
Yes, I do.
我想
'cause that phone call needs to be done by 4:23
因为那通电话必须在4点23分前打完
so that I am not a dead man by 4:41.
否则到4点41分我就死定了
Give me my phone.
把手机还我
Nope. Nope. No. Give me -- Claire.
不不不 快给我 克莱尔
We're gonna do something together.
我们要一起去做点什么
Yes, take the rest of the day off.
来吧 今天请假吧
I can't do that.
办不到
Yes, you can. I did!
你可以的 我就请假了
Yeah, 'cause you work for your father.
是啊 因为你是给你老爸打工
No, no, no, we need this, Mitchell.
不不不 我们必须这么做 米奇尔
We really need this.
真的必须这样
Claire, I'm really swamped today, and I --
克莱尔 我今天真的很忙
Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease...
拜托拜托拜托拜托
Stop. Just go.
好了 快走吧
Pleeeeease can we slow down?
拜托拜托我们能滑慢点吗
You're chafing my wrist.
你快把我的手腕磨破了
Don't pretend you're not loving this.
别再装你不喜欢这样了
Okay. All right. I think I just skated through some pee.
好吧 我刚刚滑过一泡尿
C-can we go back now?
现在我们能回去了吗
No!
不行
No, because we are not appointment-making control freaks.
不 因为我们不是预约狂魔
We are having fun.
我们在找乐子呢
You are. I'm just doing what you're making me do.
你是在找乐子 我是被你逼的
Okay, okay, stop.
好吧 停下
No, no, no. No, no, no.
不不不不不
Let's go back, let's go back, let's go back.
我们回去吧 回去吧 回去吧
Why? Why do we have to go back now?
为什么 为什么非要现在回去
Why -- oh, I get it. I get it.
为什么 我明白了 明白了
You're still scared to skate through the underpass.
你还在怕从地下通道里滑过去是吧
What do you mean, "Still"?
什么叫"还在"
What do you mean, "scared"? What underpass?
什么叫"害怕" 什么地下通道
Mitchell, you were 11 years old,
米奇尔 你11岁时
and mom made me take you with me
妈妈让我带你一起
when I was skating with my friend Sophie King,
和我朋友索菲·金去玩轮滑
and you were terrified to go through the underpass
地下通道很黑 所以你害怕
'cause it was dark,
不敢过去
and you were sure it was filled with monsters,
你还说里面肯定都是怪物
so we ditched you.
所以我们把你甩掉了
I don't remember this at all.
我根本都不记得了
Yeah, I skated away and called you a big baby.
我边滑走边叫你"大号婴儿"
Sophie threw a rock at me
索菲朝我扔了块石头
and you yelled, "You're so gay."
你还吼我"你真像个基佬"
I did do that.
我是喊了
Oh, didn't I?
是不是
We used to use that word a lot.
我们原来老用那个词儿
You used to be able to call anything gay.
说谁都能用"基佬"
Do you ever miss that?
你怀念吗
No.
No.
That's hurtful.
那很伤人
Yeah.
是啊
I'm sorry, Mitchell.
对不起 米奇尔
You were scared,
你当时那么害怕
and I should've held your hand through the tunnel,
我应该拉紧你的手走过通道的
and I was -- I was not a good big sister.
我不是...一个好姐姐
I'm so sorry. Will you forgive me?
对不起 你能原谅我吗
- Yes, yes. - You do?
-原谅 -原谅了吗
- Yes! I forgive you. - I love you.
-原谅 我原谅你了 -我爱你
- Love you, too. - Love you!
-我也爱你 -爱你哦
Okay, okay. Okay.
好了
- Let's do this. - Yes, let's do this.
-我们滑起来 -对 我们滑
- Come on. - What? What's happening?
-过来 -什么 干什么
No, no, no, we're going -- we're going through the tunnel.
不是 我们要滑过通道
No. God, no. No, no, no.
不 老天爷啊 不要
Oh, no, you got to get over this.
不行 你得克服自己
- No! All right. - Okay. Just let yourself go.
-不 好吧 -好啦 你放松
- Just let it go. Just -- you know? - Yep. I'm good.
-就随它吧 -好 我可以的
Uh, yeah, you got to get past it.
对 你得穿过去
N-n-no. No, no! No! N-n-no! Claire, no!
不 不 不 不要 克莱尔
N-n-no! N-no!
不要啊
I felt bad when we got separated,
被分开那瞬间我挺抱歉的
but I knew that when he skated out
但我知道
the other side of that tunnel,
等他在通道另一端出来的时候
an emotional scar would've been healed.
一个心理伤疤会痊愈的
Mitchell?! Mitchell?
米奇尔 米奇尔
No! N-no! N-n-no! N-no!
不 不要啊 不要
Oh, my god! What happened? What happened?
天啊 怎么了 怎么了
- It w-- it was terrible! -Yes.
-太恐怖了 -然后呢
They took my wallet and my skates and my tie.
他们把我的钱包 轮滑鞋和领带都抢了
What -- what homeless person needs a tie?
一个流浪汉要领带干嘛使
Oh, my god. I am so sorry, Mitchell!
天啊 太对不起了 米奇尔
Okay, um... Can you give me my phone?
好了 能把我手机还给我吗
'cause I got to, you know, cancel my cards.
我得注销银行卡
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, god. I hope you have juice.
好 给 给你 希望还有电
That thing has been buzzing like crazy.
这一天震死我了
Oh, god! Okay. Okay.
天呐 好吧
My meeting's been pushed up.
我的会议被提前了
It's in 15 minutes.
15分钟后就要开始了
Okay, okay. Okay, okay.
好吧 好吧
Look at me. Look at me.
看着我 看着我
This is a test, and we don't sweat the small stuff.
这是个测试 我们不为小事忧心
- Just let it go. - Stop it! Stop it.
-就随它吧 -够了 停
I know you think you discovered the new you,
我知道你觉得找到了新自我
but you are controlling
但你在努力不去控制别人的时候
even when you're trying to not be controlling.
仍然是个彻头彻尾的控制狂
So j-- give me your skates.
所以 把轮滑鞋给我
What? Why?
什么 为什么
You've dragged me so far,
我被你拖了这么远
we're closer to my office than we are to the car.
现在我离办公室比离我们的车要近
Take 'em off!
脱鞋
He just wasn't ready.
他还是没准备好
But me?
但我呢
I had a message for the small stuff
我要让那些曾经掌控我生活的
that used to rule my life.
小事情知道我的讯息
Hey, Phil. Honey, how you holding up?
菲尔 亲爱的 你怎么样
Good.
很好
So, I'm at the beach -- long story.
我在沙滩这 长话短说
Anyway, I was hoping you wouldn't mind
你介不介意在家等着
waiting at the house for Luke's tutor.
卢克的家教来
Actually, I would mind. I'd mind quite a bit.
我介意 很介意
I'm kind of busy.
我这很忙
Okay, great.
好的 很好
Suck it, small stuff.
去死吧 鸡毛蒜皮的小事
Why are we stopping?
我们为什么停下
For many, a near-miss with death is a wake-up call.
对许多人来说 濒死体验是一种警钟
But when a man misses his own near-miss,
但当你差一点就没赶上差一点就死的体验
he truly sees what he's been missing.
才会真正醒悟自己错失了什么
No more putting my dreams on hold.
我的梦想经不起等待
卢克的遗愿清单曼妥思喷射器憋气超过五分钟造一个蝙蝠洞嚼更多的口香糖学法语克隆我自己
Five years ago, I made a bucket list.
五年前 我做了一个遗愿清单
It was time to start crossing things off.
是时候开始行动了
Scariest moment of my life.
人生恐怖瞬间之极
Oh, my gosh. I thought I lost you!
天啊 我还以为失去你了
But amazingly, something great came out of it.
但神奇的是 有好事发生了
I found out how my sister truly feels about me.
我知道姐姐对我的真感情了
Girls, are you sure?
姑娘们 真的吗
Positive. We'll walk home.
真的 我们走回家
We almost died.
我们差点就死了
Yeah.
是啊
A-about what you said in the car...
你在车里说的那句...
Please don't make fun of me right now.
拜托现在不要取笑我
No, I would never.
没 我永远不会取笑你的
It was actually really honest.
其实你说得好坦诚
And I need to stop taking shots at your intelligence.
我不该再挖苦你的智商了
You don't do it that often.
你也不是经常那样做
Well, you miss a lot of it.
因为很多次你都没听出来
There, I did it again.
看哪 我又那样做了
Did what?
做什么了
Uh, it doesn't matter.
无关紧要
I always considered you to be this self-absorbed person,
我一直认为你是很自私的人
but you're more substantial than that, aren't you?
不过其实你挺有深度的 是吧
Thank you.
谢谢你
You know what? I'm blowing off judo today.
这样吧 我今天不去学柔道了
Let's hang out.
我们一起玩
What should we do?
我们做什么好呢
Makeovers.
给你改变造型
Okay.
好吧
Great!
太好了
We're gonna walk right past my waxing place.
我们会路过我做蜜蜡脱毛的地方
Say goodbye to that gal stache.
跟你的女士小胡须说再见吧
If it were easy, everyone would be hot.
如果舒服的话 那所有人都是辣妹了
Yep, you know, I-it's not just my feet.
是 但不仅是高跟鞋让我的脚疼
It's from when I walked into the stop sign
是我不慎撞到了停车标志牌上面
because you wouldn't give me back my --
因为你不肯还给我...
Okay, fine. I'll give you back your man-goggles. Here.
好吧 把你的眼镜还给你 拿着
I just thought we might run into
我只是以为回家的路上
some cute boys on the way home,
我们可能会遇到几个帅哥
but it's probably best we didn't.
不过 幸好没有遇到
That's a pretty angry lip you got there.
你的嘴唇又红又肿
Really?
真的吗
Does everybody's get this red?
别人都会这么红吗
Well, you had quite a bit of growth.
你的汗毛太多了
I was gonna have that lady take a crack at your arms,
我本来还想让那个女人处理一下你的胳膊
but she had already sweat through her apron.
不过她的围裙都被汗湿透了
Oh, my gosh!
天呐
I already have 100 likes on my picture of my new nails.
我新指甲的照片已经得到一百个赞了
Um, FYI, I'm -- I'm sort of in the background there,
告诉你一声 照片背景里好像有我
screaming mid-wax.
脱毛时尖叫的样子
400 people liked this photo.
四百个人对此照片点赞
I was not one of them.
我不是其中之一
My art teacher
我的美术老师
made a pithy "Blue period" comment,
留了个关于"蓝调时期"的短评
蓝调时期: 毕加索在这个时期作品以蓝色为主人物头发 眉毛 眼睛皆蓝
and my top prom prospect
而我的头号候选舞会舞伴
suddenly found a girlfriend in Canada.
突然找了个加拿大女朋友
Do you think I could get my sneakers back?
你能不能把运动鞋还给我
Ohh, I threw them away with the rest of your clothes
你去试衣服的时候
when you were in the changing room.
我把你的鞋和衣服都扔了
I thought about saving them for the housekeeper,
我本来想把它们送给管家的
but I couldn't remember if she had a son.
可我不记得她是不是有儿子
Look, I've tried really hard to put up with a lot since...
听着 我已经很努力地在忍受你...
What's going on?
怎么了
Oh, I just had so much fun with you!
跟你在一起真开心
We don't do this enough.
我们一起玩的机会太少了
I just wish there was something that you could teach me.
真希望有什么可以让你教我的
Wait, what about your judo stuff?
等等 你教我柔道怎么样
Uh you're not interested in that.
你不会感兴趣的
No! No! I am! Come on!
才不是 我有兴趣 来嘛
Karate-chop me or something!
来个斜劈还是什么的
That is not --
那不是...
Okay. All right.
好吧 我教你
Let's just do one simple move.
我们先做一个简单的动作
Okay.
好的
Now, this won't wrinkle my top, will it?
不会弄皱我的上衣吧
That was actually fun!
这可太有意思了
Show me one more time.
再教我一次
Oh, no!
Oh, my gosh. I thought I lost you again.
天呐 我以为又失去你了呢
Wait, wait, wait. Back up. Again?
等等 倒回去 又是怎么回事
Oh, yeah, when we almost got killed,
是啊 差点出车祸的时候
I thought I lost my phone.
我以为把手机摔坏了
It was really scary.
那可真恐怖
Mentos-pramp-climb, test number two.
曼妥思喷射器 第二次测试
Lesson learned -- when pressure builds to dangerous levels,
经验教训 当压力达到危险等级
it must be released.
必须得到释放
Is your lip getting better or your face getting redder?
是你的嘴好些了 还是你的脸变红了
Just gonna pop into the family room.
我去客厅啦
What the hell was that?!
你在搞什么
Oh, I'm just getting started!
这才刚刚开始呢
Why do you have to be such a silly --
为什么你要这样傻...
Haley, stop!
海莉 住手
Mom!
妈妈
Phil, honey.
菲尔 亲爱的
I was already on edge.
我本来就心情沉重
The day before, I was with my mom at the park
前一天 我和妈妈在公园
when some guy on a bike swiped her phone.
有个骑自行车的人抢走了她的手机
He must have been a criminal mastermind.
他一定是个惯犯
He struck the one second she wasn't
只那一秒她没在给乔拍照
taking pictures of Joe.
就被他抓住了
The worst part is, I saw him grab it.
最糟的是 我眼看着他抢走手机
I had a chance to do something
我本来有机会做点什么
and be a hero to my mom, but I froze.
在妈妈面前做个英雄的 可我僵住了
What would you have done,
你会怎么做
made him the subject of a satirical cartoon?
使他成为讽刺漫画的主角吗
Hey! Uh, they've taken down presidents.
那些漫画曾扳倒过总统
Now, can you just support me here?
你能不能支持我一下
There are only so many moments a son has a chance to --
并没有多少机会可以让儿子为...
Very mature.
真成熟
Pick a fight then tune me out?
挑起事端 然后又不理我了吗
It's not bothering me. Stop it!
我才不在乎 停下
Dad, turn down that song!
爸爸 音乐声调小点
*No can do.*
*办不到*
You sure, Manny?
你确定吗 曼尼
Positive. I-I'll walk home.
是的 我走回家
- We almost died. - Yeah.
-我们差点死了 -是啊
White.
白人
Yes, I'm sure.
是的 我确定
Why is it so hard for you to imagine
有那么难想象犯罪的是白人吗
that a criminal can be white when most of the --
就算大多数罪犯都是...
Ah, the bicycle.
你说单车的颜色啊
Yes, yes, it was white.
是的 是白色
I thought your phone got stolen?
你手机不是被偷了吗
This is Joe's phone.
这是乔的手机
This is why the terrorists hate us.
所以恐怖分子才痛恨我们
The universe is cold and unfeeling.
整个世界冰冷无情
The only constant is chaos.
唯一不变的只有混乱
Was that place out of chocolate-chip pancakes again?
巧克力薄饼又卖光了吗
We were all almost killed by a truck.
我们差点被卡车撞死
Ay Dios mio! Are you okay, papi?
我的天啊 你没事吧 宝贝
This was all Phil's fault, wasn't it?
都是菲尔的错对吧
He's always blaring that damn new wave music!
他老是听那种该死的新潮音乐
No. He swerved to avoid it.
不 他急转弯避开了
Saved my life.
救了我的命
But the game of life is rigged.
不过生命无法自主
Death always win.
死亡不可避免
Okay, I know what you need right now --
好了 我知道你现在需要什么
A trip to the ice-cream shop.
去冰淇淋店
He doesn't need ice cream.
他不需要冰淇淋
He needs to talk about what just happened to him.
他要讲讲刚才发生的事
Well, I could go for some ice cream.
我可以去吃点冰淇淋的
I know how to fix my son.
我知道怎么安慰我儿子
So, this is fixed.
就这么安慰吗
Go around.
绕过去
Normally, I'd be avoiding these cracks
平时为了尊重你
out of respect of your back, Mom,
我都尽量避免这样的时刻
But after today, it seems pointless.
可过了今天好像都没有意义了
That's it. Get in.
够了 上车
No, Jay, he's afraid!
不要 杰 他害怕
It's only gonna get worse.
这样只会更糟
In. Trust me.
上车 相信我
Five minutes in here, he'll be happy as a clam.
上车五分钟他就会春光灿烂了
Aah! Mama!
妈妈呀
Calm down.
冷静
This was a bad idea.
这主意很烂
Hop out.
下车
Good for you, Jay. It has to be when he is ready.
这就对了 杰 要等他准备好
- Nope. He's driving. - What?
-不 他来开 -什么
What? I-I can't.
什么 我做不到
You're doing it now.
你给我开
Jesus, take the wheel.
神啊 开车吧
He's terrified to be in the back.
他坐后面就够害怕的了
Now you're gonna put him in the front seat
现在你要让他坐前座
so that he can kill all of us?!
这样他就能把我们都弄死了
Can you not make this fear worse?
你能别火上浇油了吗
I watched Dede coddle Mitchell
我看过米奇尔怕黑的时候
when he was afraid of the dark.
迪迪是怎么过分呵护他的
Till he was seven, he'd only blink one eye at a time --
他到七岁还是眨眼每次只眨一边
gave a lot of girls a very wrong idea.
害得不少女生误会了
Manny, you don't want to do this right?
曼尼 你不想这么做对吧
No, I really don't.
不 我不想
Okay, papi, you know what? Let's switch.
好的 宝贝 要不我们换吧
I'm going to drive.
我来开
I've got a bombshell, mom.
妈妈 我很怕[我有个美人儿]
Ay, papi, thank you, but this is a very weird thing
宝贝 多谢 但是我们这个姿势
to say when we're in this position.
说这种话太诡异了
No, I've decided I'm never driving.
不 我决定永远不开车了
No way.
不行
You there. You there.
你坐这 你坐那
We're doing this my way.
按我说的做
Ah, yeah, 'cause it's your way
每次都是要么按你说的做
or the highway.
要么就滚蛋[上高速]
Oh, God. Not the highway.
天啊 不要上高速
You always want me to be his dad.
你一直让我像个父亲一样教导他
Well, I'm being his dad.
我这不是在做吗
Oh, uh, I-I'm really scared, Jay.
我真的好怕 杰
This is what we're fixing.
这就是我们要解决的问题
Look, when I was a kid,
我还是个孩子的时候
I lived by a big, scary black lake.
住在一个巨大的吓人的黑色湖旁
I always thought there monsters in there and whatnot.
我一直觉得湖里有怪兽
One night, my dad dragged me out of bed
一天晚上 我爸把我拉下床
and tossed me right in that cold water.
然后直接把我踹进湖里
I was never scared of that lake again.
然后我就再也不怕那个湖了
Now, give it some gas.
踩油门吧
Mma! Aah!
妈妈啊
That's another habit I wouldn't mind breaking,
这个喊妈妈的习惯也要改一下
but, you know, right now we...have to...
不过我们现在必须要
Oh, what am I doing?
我在干什么呢
I hated my dad for that.
我讨厌我爸那样对我
I ended up scared of him, not the lake.
最后我怕的不是湖 变成他了
Manny, - it's okay.
曼尼 没事
Over there! On the bike!
那边 骑车那个
The white guy that stole my phone!
是偷我手机的那个白人
I don't see anyone.
我没看到有人
Yes! He just turned the corner!
就是他 他刚拐弯
The phone burglar! He's getting away!
偷手机贼 他要逃走了
Not this time.
这一次不会了
Up there to the left!
前面左转
I don't see anyone!
我什么人都没看到
I didn't see anyone either. I made it up.
我也没看到 我乱说的
I am not going to
我可不要
drive my son around until he's 40.
到了儿子40岁时还得开车载他
The only thing stronger than Manny's fear
唯一能战胜曼尼的恐惧的
is his need to protect his mama.
是他保护他的妈妈的愿望
Oh, no! He got away!
不 他跑了
But you did very good, Manny.
但是你做得很不错
That was a frickin' rush!
我刚刚开得超快
But we're not giving up. We're gonna find that guy.
但我不会放弃 我们会抓到那个人的
No!
Are you sure about this?
你确定要这样吗
Just go. I'm walking home.
你们走吧 我走路回家
I can't even hear him, it's so loud.
我听不见他说话 太吵了
Can everybody just shut up?!
你们能闭嘴吗
- Hello. - Hello. Is this Phil Dumpster?
-你好 -请问是菲尔·邓垃圾桶吗
What do you want, Gil?
干嘛 格尔
Got to be kidding me. Hang on.
没搞错吧 等等
Is that your hot wife I hear?
是你的极品娇妻在说话吗
Hey, is she still taking those yoga classes?
她还在上那些瑜伽课吗
Hanging up.
我要挂了
W-w-wait. Wait. Real quick.
等等 就说一句话
The listing at 225 Cedar Street,it's mine now.
锡达街225号的房子归我管了
Poach有"窃取"和"水煮"两个意思poached egg: 水煮蛋
You poached my listing?
你居然偷了我的房子
Poached it, seasoned it,
不仅偷了 还给它调了味
and covered it in Thorpe-andaise sauce, my friend.
顺便加了索普蛋白酱呢 哥们
You should thank me, dumpy.
你该谢谢我 傻邓
You're back in second place
你又退居二线了
with your favorite view...
不过你还能看到美景
my sweet behind.
那就是我的后背
Why does everything with him have to be so dramatic?
为什么事情一碰到他就都这么麻烦
Why are we stopping?
我们为什么要停下来
Oh, my God! I thought I lost you.
天呐 我以为我失去你了
What's to tell?
能说什么呢
A truck runs a stop sign, I avoid it,
卡车开过了停车标示 我避开了卡车
everyone walks away, bing, bang, no boom.
大家都走开了 有惊无险
- There was a truck! - That was crazy!
-那可是辆卡车 -太吓人了
Everybody calm down. Calm down. Let's not overreact.
大家都冷静一下 别激动
- What?! - Dad!
-你说什么 -老爸
- We were almost just killed! - Yes!
-我们差点就死了 -是啊
Exactly. Almost, which means we're all just fine.
没错 差点 也就是说我们都没事
You aren't the least bit upset?
你就没有一点点后怕吗
It's gonna take more than that to ruin a morning
今天早上我吃的华夫饼上有奶油笑脸
that started with a whipped-cream smile on my waffle.
要毁掉这样美好的早晨可没这么容易
Okay, it may have affected me a little,
其实我是受了点影响
but sometimes it's hard to know what you're feeling.
但有时要明白自己的感受并不容易
Mostly, I was thinking about racquetball later
我当时在想之后的壁球训练
and hopefully giving Cam a nice spanking.
我要给小卡狠狠来一招
Fair warning, may be working out some anger issues
说明一下 今早的壁球训练
on the racquetball court this morning.
我可能要发泄一下情绪
- Don't ask. - Sounds good.
-别问原因 -没问题
So, we're getting our new dryer delivered.
我们新买的烘干机到了
It's supposed to be eggshell,
应该是蛋壳白色的
but, oh, it's not eggshell, it's white.
但送来的不是蛋壳白 是纯白色
Anyway, I'm laying into the delivery driver,
我当时正在跟送货员吵架
and Mitchell strolls in and says, "Oh, it's fine,"
结果米奇尔插进来说"没关系"
and then offers him a piece of his banana loaf.
还给送货员一块香蕉面包
I heard that.
真是气人
Just once, I would like
哪怕一次也好 我希望
Mitchell to take my side.
米奇尔站在我这边
I am constantly strolling in and saving him
每次我都会替他说话
like a little princess in the tower.
就像拯救困在塔中的公主
Sometimes I'd like to be the princess.
有时候我也想当公主
- Six of one, right? - What?
-怎样都是一样 对吧 -什么
Why are, why are we stopping?
我们为什么在这里停
I'm-I'm very confused, Phillip.
我不明白 菲利普
Trust me, this house is gonna sell at Thorpe speed.
相信我 这房子会以索普光速卖出的
Hey, guys.
你们好
- Oh, hey, Phil. - I guess you heard. I'm sorry.
-菲尔 -看来你知道了 抱歉
Oh, no, it happens all the time.
没关系 这事时有发生
I just stopped by to give you guys a little care package
我就是过来给你们一点良心建议
to show you there's no hard feelings.
以证明我完全没有介怀
Class act, Dung beetle.
非常有绅士风度 邓菲虫
Here's the Malpractice Attorney
这是专攻不法行为案件的律师的名片
most of his clients have used after he's ripped them off.
大部分他的客户受到伤害后都找这个律师
You will be losing some sleep,
你们可能会失眠
but these have always helped my wife.
这种药总能帮我妻子入睡
And this priest is retired,
这个神父已经退休了
but I think he still does exorcisms,
但他应该还在主持驱魔活动
which you'll need after today.
今天过后你们会需要的
- Listen, Phil—- - It's okay.
-菲尔 -没关系的
It's sad, really, to see a once-mediocre realtor
看见一个曾经中庸的地产经纪堕落如此
reduced to this.
也挺让人伤心的
Gil, please, let's keep this civil.
格尔 别这样 好好说话
Oh, by the way, if you ever speak disrespectfully again
还有 如果你再对我老婆出言不敬
about my wife, I'll kill you.
我会杀了你
Sorry. That sounded like a joke.
抱歉 我说得好像这是个玩笑
I will actually kill you.
我真的会杀了你
Anyhow, when you guys wake up
总之 如果你们能清醒过来
硫磺的味道通常被和邪恶的事联系在一起
and smell the sulfur,
闻到硫磺的味道
here's a list of other realtors,
这是其它地产经纪的名单
and if you need me, I'll be in the office at 9:00,
如果想找我 我九点上班
10:00. I have the dentist.
还是十点吧 我要去看牙医
Where did that come from?
这是怎么回事
Life's too short to be ruled by fear.
人生苦短 不能被恐惧操控
What do you say
公主 我们去
we get you the right dryer, princess?
把你想要的那台烘干机要来怎样
Oh, my.
天呐
I mean, Phil is usually just so...
菲尔平常很...
but then he was just, like, so...
但那天他很...
and then he got even more...
接着还变得更...
There's nothing I can do.
我无能为力
- I can't go for that. - No can do.
-我不接受 -办不到
Cameron here bought an eggshell dryer.
卡梅隆买了一台蛋壳白的烘干机
Not white, not oatmeal,
不是纯白 不是燕麦色
not Swiss-coffee,
不是瑞士咖啡白
not baby-powder, not bone.
不是爽身粉白 也不是骨白
Eggshell. Look, Rob, is it?
是蛋壳白 你叫罗伯是吧[抢劫]
That's interesting.
这名字真有趣
Here's how this is going down--
接下来是这样
we don't leave without that eggshell dryer.
没有蛋壳白的烘干机我们不会走
Not swan-feather, not chester-pig-white.
不是天鹅羽毛白 不是切斯特猪白
I think we've covered the colors.
颜色已经说得够清楚了
I sell houses to people every day
我每天都卖房子给不同的人
who ask me where they should buy their dryer.
他们会问我去哪买烘干机比较好
I don't think you want me giving them any static.
你不希望我告诉他们哪家不能去吧
I may have one in the back.
后面可能还有一台
But it takes two guys to load the truck,
但要两个人把它从车上搬下来
and it's just me today.
今天这里只有我一人
Is it?
是吗
It was right about then
就在那电光火石的一瞬
that a question started nagging at me.
我的心头涌上一个问题
Is Phil sexy?
菲尔性感吗
You feel like doing something a little crazy with me?
你想跟我做点疯狂的事吗
What? No. What? No.
什么 不想 什么 不想
Hey, honey.
你好啊 亲爱的
Phil, honey, how you holding up?
菲尔 亲爱的 你还好吗
Good.
挺好的
I'm at the beach -- long story.
我在沙滩 说来话长
I was hoping you wouldn't mind
我希望你不介意
waiting at the house for Luke's tutor.
在家等着卢克的补习老师
Actually, I would mind. I'd mind quite a bit.
实际上 我挺介意的 我做不到啊
- I'm kind of busy. - Okay.
-我挺忙的 -好吧
Cam, there's something that Claire would never approve of
小卡 有件事是克莱尔永远不会允许的
that I've always wanted to do.
但却是我一直都想做的
Always?
一直吗
We're gonna want to put a blanket down on that backseat.
我们要在后车座上铺块毛毯
This was a huge mistake.
这是个巨大的错误
I am jammed in the backseat with a hairy Peruvian biter.
我跟一只多毛的秘鲁神兽被困在后车座
It's spring break '92 all over again!
简直是92年的春假情景重演
Well, speed bump coming up. Hold the leash taut.
前方有减速带 把绳子拉紧一点
It's supposed to keep her calm.
那样可以让它保持镇静
I got lucky. I don't think this one's a spitter.
我挺走运的 这家伙不喜欢吐口水
uh, I spoke too soon.
我话说太早了
You think? That's it. Pull over.
你这样觉得吗 真是够了 快停车
You know, Phil, I wanted to support you on this.
菲尔 我也想支持你的
I'm a firm believer in livestock in the home,
我坚决支持在家里养牲畜
But you are out of control.
但你实在是太失控了
No, I'm in control -- more than ever.
不 一切完全在我掌控之中
And if me getting what I want
如果我为了让自己称心如意
inconveniences people a little,
而给别人稍微带来了一点点麻烦
then so be it.
随便吧
Uh, she's nervous.
它紧张了
The guy said you should let her suck on your hair.
饲养员说你该让它舔你的头发
Okay, that is it. I am done.
好了 够了 我不干了
Enough of this ridiculousness.
一切的荒唐到此为止
And thank you, Phil,
谢你了啊 菲尔
For making me appreciate Mitchell.
因为你让我意识到了米奇尔的好
He may have his faults,
他或许是有一些缺点
but at least he's not a crazy person.
但至少他不是个疯子
Phil, honey.
菲尔 亲爱的
Yes, Claire.
在呢 克莱尔
I got an alpaca -- again.
我又搞了匹草泥马回家
And there's nothing you can say about it.
你不能发表任何不满的意见
I'm not saying anything. What's the problem?
我不会发表任何意见的 有什么问题啊
Mom, dad!
妈 爸
There is a camel in the living room!
客厅里有头骆驼
It's not a c--
那不是骆...
- I-I just can't. - Okay.
-我做不到 -好了
I see you've all met Jolene two.
看来你们都见过乔琳2号了吧
Sadly, the original Jolene
不幸的是 你妈强迫我
that your mother made me return
退回去的那头乔琳
was cruelly adopted by a children's hospital.
被一家儿童医院残忍地收养了
You see, something hit me this morning
今早那辆卡车没有把我撞死
when that truck didn't hit me this morning --
但却把我的脑子撞开了窍
I have not been in control of my own life.
我一直都没有真正掌控自己的人生
But those days are done.
但那种日子到此为止了
Well, I guess I'm not in control of everything, am I?
看来我真是无法掌控任何事啊 是吧
funny, isn't it?
真有意思 不是吗
You can try and try, but in the blink of an eye...
你可以用尽全力尝试 但是在眨眼之间
you can lose everything that matters to you.
你可能就会失去对你重要的一切
Dad, are you okay?
爸 你还好吧
Don't you all see what's going on here?
你们还不明白现在的情况吗
Dad really wanted that milk.
老爸真的很想喝那杯牛奶
I almost lost you guys today -- all of you.
我今天差点就失去了你们所有人
Just like that.
就是那样
Aw, daddy.
爹地
Oh, honey.
亲爱的
You spent the whole day trying to control everything,
你一整天都在试图掌控一切
and I spent the entire day trying not to,
我这一整天却在试图不去掌控任何事
and neither way worked, did it?
但两种方法都没奏效 不是吗
Nope.
是没有
I may fight you on this,
我或许会跟你唱反调
but I'm gonna need you to make me get rid of Jolene two.
但我需要你强迫我把乔琳2号也退回去
- She's a biter. - I know.
-它很凶悍 -我知道
As soon as we're done with this hug.
不过要等我们先拥抱完才行
Hey, whatever this is,
嘿 不管你们在干什么
I need to get in on it.
我都必须参与一下
I almost died today.
我今天差点死了
- Grandpa. - Daddy.
-外公 -爸
Aw, dad.
爸啊
Come here.
快过来
Come here, you.
都过来
Learn how to drive, lady!
去驾校学学开车啊 婆娘
I will get to the meeting when I get there.
等我准备好了再去开会
I looked death in the face today.
我今天和死神擦肩而过
Hel-- hello. Yes, I would like to leave a message.
喂 好的 我想留个言
My husband ordered an eggshell dryer --
我丈夫之前预定了一台蛋壳色烘干机
Not talc, not parchment
不是爽身粉 不是羊皮纸
-- eggshell.
是蛋壳色的
You're home early. What happened to you?
你今天回来要早些啊 这是怎么了
Doesn't matter.
那不重要
So, I called that appliance store,
我打电话给那个家电卖场了
And I demanded that
我要求他们务必
you get the dryer that you wanted.
把你想要的那台烘干机送到
Oh, well, it must've worked
你的强硬态度一定奏效了
because they're taking away the wrong one right now.
因为他们现在正把那台发错货的搬走呢
Anything for you, princess.
愿意随时为你效劳 小公主
Who's this guy? Get over here, sexy.
我都不认识你了 快过来 性感帅哥
If you want to see sexy, I just...
如果你想见识下什么叫性感 我...
What is all over you?
你身上是什么啊
Well, now you are.
现在应该是你的鼻涕吧