摩登家庭 第六季 Modern Family Season 6 第6集: Halloween 3 AwesomeLand

上映日期: 2,014

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧 / 家庭

导演: 贝丝·麦卡锡-米勒

演员: 艾德·奥尼尔 / 索菲娅·维加拉 / 朱丽·鲍温 / 泰·布利尔 / 杰西·泰勒·弗格森 / 艾瑞克·斯通斯崔特 / 里克·罗德里格兹 / 诺兰·古德 / 萨拉·海蓝德 / 阿芮尔·温特 / 奥布里·


台词
Look -- in the hallway!
快看 走廊里
It's a bird! It's a plane!
有只鸟 有架飞机
It's super-out-of-breath.
真是超上气不接下气啊
Happy Halloween to you, too.
也祝你万圣节快乐
I'm sorry. I'm just --
对不起 我只是
I'm really nervous about this closing argument today.
我很担心今天的结辩陈词
Is it because you've lost three cases in a row?
是因为你已经连输三个案子了吗
Whispering it doesn't make it any less painful.
这么小声说也不会减轻痛苦的
- Sorry. - Okay.
-抱歉 -好了
No, it's just that this case --
不是 是这个案子本身
It's so hard to hold the jury's attention.
很难维持陪审团的注意力
Well, do you want to run your argument by me?
你要跟我排练一遍你的陈词吗
- Could I? - Sure.
-可以吗 -当然
Um, okay.
Six years ago, Alger Equities
六年前 阿尔杰证券公司
took investments
从市政养老基金
from municipal pension funds and private investors
和个人投资者获得投资
and funneled all of that into offshore --
然后将这些资金全部投向海外...
And I've already lost you.
你已经没在听我说了
No. I was just thinking -- because it's Halloween,
不 我是在想今天正好是万圣节
what if you wore these in the courtroom?
你戴着这个出庭怎么样
Show the jury "Hey, I'm playful."
向陪审团显示"看 我这人很幽默"
Cam, I'm an attorney,
小卡 我是律师
not Bugs Bunny trying to hide on a train.
不是在火车上躲猫猫的兔八哥
I'm ready.
我准备好了
There's Waldo!
沃尔多来了
I think I'm gonna win the costume contest.
这次装扮服比赛我要赢了
Hey, now, honey, it's not important if you win.
亲爱的 赢不赢不重要
It's just for fun. Picture.
主要是好玩 来拍个照
But it's more fun if you win.
但如果赢了就更好玩了
No offense, Daddy.
无意冒犯 小爸
You know, Lily's been letting me know recently
莉莉最近一直在暗示我
that she's feeling neglected.
她觉得被冷落了
I think it's because of all my football stuff.
应该是因为我一心扑在橄榄球上
That's why I went all out on her costume.
所以我这次卯足劲儿装扮她
Look how incredibly accurate it is.
你看是不是一模一样
Where is that little guy?
那小家伙在哪儿呢
Come on. Come to me. Come on.
快点 快出现 快点
Here you -- here you go.
在...在这儿
儿童读物《寻找沃尔多》读者要在一副混乱的图中找出主人公沃尔多
No matter how long he stares at it,
无论他盯着沃尔多看多久
Cam cannot find Waldo.
小卡就是找不到他
It's crazy.
太不可思议了
O-once, he pointed to a barber pole,
有一次 他指着理发店外的旋转彩柱
and we just gave it to him.
我们就让他以为他找对了
Where is the little guy?
那小家伙在哪儿
He's right there.
就在这儿
How do you find it so...
你是怎么这么快找到...
Let's try these.
你试试这个
家 庭
摩 登
第六季 第五集
Okay.
好了
Boys, what do you think about my costume for tonight?
伙计们 你们觉得我今晚穿这身怎么样
You look dynamite, honey.
看起来好极了 亲爱的
Ay, thank you. I am Princess Fiona.
谢谢 我是菲欧娜公主
So does that make me a prince?
这样我要扮王子吗
Do I have to keep track of a crown all night?
我得一整晚都扶着个王冠吗
No, you're Shrek, the ogre.
不 你扮史瑞克 那头怪物
You mean that big green thing?
你是说那个绿怪物吗
Nah, I don't want to walk around all night
不 我才不想一整晚都戴着
with an ugly rubber mask.
丑兮兮的橡胶面具
No. You just need to paint your face green,
不用 你只要把脸涂成绿色
and that's it.
就可以了
You do this every time.
你每次都这样
You go as a princess. I have to go as some freak.
你自己扮成公主 我就得扮成个怪物
You're beauty, I'm the beast.
你当美女 我当野兽
You're Beyonce? I'm...that guy.
你当碧昂斯 我就是...那谁
Well, you never want to go shopping with me for costumes,
你又不跟我一起去买装扮服
so I get what I want,
所以我想买什么就买什么
and you are what comes with it.
你就得跟我配套
Well, this year, I'm getting my own costume,
今年 我要自己打扮一套
and it's gonna be tough and manly --
打扮得很健壮 充满男子汉气概
maybe a cowboy or a construction worker.
比如牛仔或者建筑工人
You know that
你知道
that's what Mitch and Cam wore last year, right?
米奇和小卡去年就是那样穿的吧
Damn it! I cut my finger!
该死 我切到我的手指了
Happy Halloween.
万圣节快乐
No, really -- I cut myself. Look!
我是说真的 我切到手指了 你看
That looks great.
很逼真啊
What'd you use to make the blood?
那血是用什么弄的
A knife. I'm actually hurt.
用刀 我真的受伤了
Great production value, sweetheart.
水平很高嘛 亲爱的
I'm impressed.
了不起
Can't believe I've got to go to work on Halloween.
难以置信万圣节我还得上班
This blows!
真讨厌
Don't worry.By the time you get home,
别担心 你回家的时候
[奇妙乐园]
AwesomeLand will be up and running.
奇妙乐园就已经投入运作了
Claire's busy with work this year,
克莱尔今年工作很忙
so I'm taking over the halloween duties.
所以由我来负责万圣节活动
My theme is AwesomeLand.
我的主题是奇妙乐园
Which includes anything Phil finds awesome.
包含一切菲尔觉得很奇妙的东西
It's a pretty big umbrella.
比如一把巨大的伞
Big, pretty umbrellas -- those are awesome.
巨大的美丽的伞 简直太奇妙了
Claire loves blood and guts and gore,
克莱尔喜欢血 内脏啊 暴力什么的
but who says Halloween has to be scary?
但谁说万圣节一定要这么吓人
Everybody but you.
除了你之外的所有人
This is killing her.
这简直要让她气死了
At least something's dying.
至少有什么要死掉了
Court is now in session.
现在开庭
Counselor, are you ready to deliver closing arguments?
律师 准备好做结辩陈词了吗
Yes, your honor.
是的 法官大人
Well, let's get --
那就开始
Wait. Where is Holly?
等等 奥利呢
Sorry, your honor. My bus was late.
抱歉 法官大人 我的公交车晚了
Counselor, proceed.
律师 开始吧
O-okay.
好的
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
各位陪审团成员
the details of this case are --
这件案子的细节
are complicated and technical,
复杂又充满专业术语
but they have a, uh, a tragic and profound effect on the victims.
但是对受害者有悲惨又深远的影响
Uh, the, um...
那个...
pensions were squandered, lives were destroyed,
养老金遭到滥用 生活被毁
and careers, once so promising,
曾经很有前途的职业
were now...ruined.
现在全完了
So, because of this marriage,
因为这段婚姻
you're basically third cousins with Shakira.
你基本上就是歌手夏奇拉的第三个表弟了
I mean, we don't get the free tickets,
我们没法拿到免费的演唱会门票
but it's fun.
但很好玩
Ay, dios mios. What is this?
天啊 这是什么
What's up, princess? I'm Prince Charming.
怎么了公主 我是白马王子
I can see that.
我能看出来
I got Joe a donkey costume,
我给乔准备了驴子装扮服
and I got Stella cat ears.
给斯黛拉准备了猫耳
I just hope she doesn't chase herself.
希望她不要追赶自己
Ah, I get it -- because she's a dog.
我懂 因为她是一只狗
I also found out that Princess Fiona
我还发现菲奥娜公主
is supposed to wear a tiara, so here you go.
应该戴皇冠 所以给你
They had a whole bucket full of 'em.
他们有一桶呢
I love it.
我好喜欢
Ay, and you look so handsome.
你看起来好帅
It's like those pictures of you in the navy.
像是你当海军时拍的照片上的样子
I have an idea.
我有个主意
Why don't we put Joe down for a nap
不如我们让乔睡个午觉
and then we go and take a nap,
然后我们也去休息会儿
but not the one we sleep --
但不是去睡...
I got it. I'm in.
我明白 我加入
Okay.
[奇妙乐园]
Hey. I thought you had a big meeting.
你今天不是要开重大会议吗
I do, but I left my cellphone here.
是啊 但我把手机忘在家里了
I need it to read at stoplights
我需要在红灯时用手机阅读
so I don't think about stuff.
这样就不会乱想了
I'm sorry, but that's ridiculous.
抱歉 这太荒唐了
Ohhh. Honey, I don't think that fits.
亲爱的 这好像不大合适
It fits in AwesomeLand.
在奇妙乐园里就很合适
It's a magic hat.
这是魔法帽
I'm gonna have this bunny jumping out of it.
我会让这只兔子从里面跳出来
You gonna put some blood on it,
你要在里面放点血吗
maybe dangle an eyeball?
也许掉出一个眼球
Who hurt you?
谁伤害了你啊
I'm kidding.
我开玩笑的
I know it's Jay and Dede.
我知道是杰和迪迪
Anyway, I got to go get my costume.
总之 我得去取装扮服了
Oh, for god's sake.
看在老天的份上
I kiss my mom hotter than that.
我亲我妈都比那有激情
He does. I seen it.
是的 我见过
Our new neighbors,
我们的新邻居
medical-marijuana retailer Ronnie and his wife, Amber,
医用大麻零售商罗尼和他老婆安布尔
moved in two months ago, and --
两个月前搬了过来
It's been a week and a half.
才一周半啦
Dear god. Really?
天啊 真的吗
Yeah.
是啊
I don't get it.
我不明白
What's scary about a giant cupcake?
一个巨型纸杯蛋糕有什么吓人的
We're not doing scary this year.
今年我们不玩吓人的
Well, heads up --
提醒一下
we're doing crap-your-pants scary on account of the contest,
我们要举行吓出屎来的恐怖比赛
so I just hope we don't offend you over here in candy land.
希望不会冒犯到糖果乐园的你们
What contest?
什么比赛
Oh, it's something we started in the old neighborhood.
这是我们在之前的社区组织的比赛
If you're into it, you, uh, chip in 20 bucks,
如果你想加入 就交20块
and scariest house on the street wins the pot.
街上最吓人的房子获得奖金[大麻]
Not actual pot.
不是真的大麻啦
I'd have to see a prescription for that.
我需要处方才能给你拿
Wait. You're not a cop --
等等 你不是警察...
No, for the 12th time, I'm not a cop.
我都说了12次了 我不是警察
Well, you are not gonna offend me
你们的装饰
with your little decorations.
不会冒犯到我
Please know that this... is Phil.
要知道这一切都是菲尔搞的
When I'm in charge, it's terrifying.
要我来负责 一切都会很可怕的
I'll bet you give all the other soccer moms
我相信你会别着一个写着"呸"的胸针
a good scare with that pin that says "Boo."
把别的"孩奴"妈妈吓一跳
You are so lucky that I have to go to work today,
你真走运我今天要去上班
or I would show you scary.
否则我会让你见识一下什么叫吓人
I would win your little contest.
我会赢得你的小比赛
You don't know what you're up against.
你不知道你的对手有多强大
We don't let preggos or people with heart trouble
我们不会让孕妇或者有心脏病的人
past our front gate.
经过我家大门
Couple years ago,
几年前
we scared a man Into the hospital almost to death.
我们吓得一个人进了医院 他差点吓死
Well, since you got an excuse, princess,
既然你有借口 公主
looks like my winning streak will carry on.
看来我的连胜纪录会保持
Might even win at the old house, too.
也许我们家的老房子也能赢呢
We left that place pretty scary.
那地方挺吓人的
I'm meeting a friend for coffee.
我要去跟一个朋友喝咖啡
No, you're not. No.
不行
You're helping me take this all down.
你要帮我把这些都弄倒
Everything goes.
全都拿开
Everything except the bunny.
除了兔子
I have plans for the bunny.
我对兔子有安排
Okay! On three, say "Argh!"
好了 数到三 说"啊"
- Argh One, two, three! - Argh Argh!
-一 二 三 -啊
Oh, that's great.
太棒了
Thank you. And how are you two related?
谢谢 你俩是什么关系
Uh, you know what -- gay or straight,
知道吗 不管是异性恋还是同性恋
there's no wrong way to make a family, so...
都可以组建家庭 所以...
Okay, down, girl.
好了 别激动
I meant, how are your costumes related?
我是说 你俩扮演的角色有什么关系
It's a parent/child costume contest.
这是亲子装扮服比赛
It is?
是吗
It was all clearly stated on the flier.
传单上都写得清清楚楚了
There was a flier?
还有传单吗
I gave it to you, daddy!
我给你看了 大爸
I knew your costume was all wrong!
我就知道你的装扮服都搞错了
O-okay, hey, don't panic.
好吧 别慌张
There's plenty of time before the parade.
游行之前还有很多时间
Is there another character in "Where's Waldo?"
《寻找沃尔多》里面还有什么人物
Wizard Whitebeard.
白胡子巫师
Okay! Well, that'll be fun!
那就扮这个了 会很有意思的
I haven't gone out with a Whitebeard
我上次跟白胡子一起出去玩
since I took my cousin Sally to the prom.
还是带我表妹莎莉去舞会的时候
All right, I'll be back as soon as I can.
好了 我尽快回来
Lily, explain daddy's joke.
莉莉 解释一下大爸的梗
I loved having hair, and I knew how to use it.
我喜欢有头发 我知道怎么物尽其用
I'd walk up to a pretty girl
我可以走到美女面前
and run my hand through my hair.
捋一下头发
Score a touchdown, whip the helmet off,
停下摩托车 摘掉头盔
run my hand through my hair.
捋一下头发
People say clothes make the man,
有人说人靠衣装
but that makes no sense.
其实根本不是这回事
What makes the man is a nice head of hair.
男人的精髓在于一头浓密的靓发
Damn it! It's like a phantom limb!
该死 感觉好像我的头发还在一样
[地狱疯人院]
No. No!
不行 不行
This doesn't look real at all.
这一点都不像真的
Alex, where's that blood
艾丽克斯 你早上
you were using this morning on your finger?
涂在手指上的血是哪儿来的
Running through my veins, keeping me alive.
在我血管里流着呢 好让我活着
Here comes dad.
老爸回来了
He's gonna be all like,
他肯定会喊
"No! What did you do?!
不 你们干了什么
Where's AwesomeLand?!"
奇妙乐园哪去了
No! What did you do?! Where's AwesomeLand?!
不 你们干了什么 奇妙乐园哪去了
Are you from the future?
你是来自未来的人吗
Phil, honey, honey,
菲尔 亲爱的 亲爱的
w-we've had a little change of plans.
计划有一点小小的改变
Why?
为什么
What are you even doing here?
你怎么在这
Shouldn't you be at work?
不是要上班吗
That obnoxious Ronnie was worried
那个超讨人厌的罗尼
that I wouldn't be able to handle his decorations,
觉得我的装饰比不过他
'cause he's trying to win
因为他想赢
this "Scariest house on the street" contest,
"这条街最可怕的房子"比赛
and I was like, "Not only can I handle your decorations.
我就说 老娘不仅要装饰得比你好
I'm gonna win that contest."
还要赢得比赛
So welcome to the insane asylum from hell.
所以 欢迎来到地狱疯人院
That's what it feels like.
我现在的感觉就像在地狱
Come on. It's gonna be fun.
来嘛 很好玩的
The kids are gonna be deranged mental patients,
孩子们扮精神错乱的病人
and -- and I am going to be a sadistic nurse,
我来当虐待狂护士
and you are a demented doctor.
你就是神经病医生
20 years of "No,"
20年来你都不同意
but for this, you'll dress like a nurse?!
为了这破比赛 你就愿意穿护士装了吗
Um, no.
恶心
Of course the woman is the nurse and the man is the doctor.
女的就该当护士 男的就该当医生
That kind of thinking -- that's what's scary.
这种重男轻女的思想 才可怕
Tap out. It's a holiday.
别说了 节日都被糟蹋了
You know, I put a lot of time and energy into my thing,
我花了那么多时间和精力来装饰
but you just shut it all down to prove something
你就这样全给毁了 就为向我们不熟
to people that we barely know and don't even like!
甚至根本不喜欢的人证明自己
Phil, Ronnie made fun of Awesomeland.
菲尔 罗尼取笑了你的奇妙乐园
He called it "Candy Land".
他叫它"糖果乐园"
So?
那又怎样
Stupidville? Dumbburgh?
傻瓜镇 蠢蛋村
Who cares what he thinks?!
谁管他怎么想
Maybe someday you'll care what I think.
你什么时候在乎一下我的想法
Phil...
菲尔
Well -- honey, look!
宝贝 看
I kept your bunny!
你的兔子我还留着
Nibbles!
小啃啃你怎么了
Made it in the nick of time.
终于赶上了
All right, let's get this parade started
趁我还是四千岁
while I'm still just 4,000 years old.
让游行开始吧
You do know the parade's not till after school, right?
你知道游行要放学后才开始吧
What? No!
什么 我不知道
I can't stay that long. I have football practice.
我待不了那么久 我有球队训练
Oh, my god. I have to tell Lily.
我的天 我得去告诉莉莉
She's gonna be devastated.
她肯定会很伤心
Oh, no.
哦不
Where's Waldo?
沃尔多在哪里
Since when has the parade been after school?
游行什么时候变成放学后才开始了
Since always. It was on the flier.
一直都是 传单上写了
How big was this flier?
单子有多大
Oh, so this is how we call each other now?
现在我们改用视频聊天了吗
Mitchell, I have a costume emergency.
米奇尔 我出了个装扮服状况
Just wear it with confidence,
自信地穿上吧
Cam. I'm sure you look great.
小卡 你穿着会很帅的
No, I can't find Lily!
不是 我找不到莉莉了
Oh, okay, found her -- by the trash can,
找到了 在垃圾桶边
next to the big kid dressed like a hobo.
旁边有个穿得像流浪汉的大个子小朋友
Oh, you did it.
还好你找到了
I don't -- I don't think that's a kid.
那个好像不是小朋友
I should probably tell a grown-up.
我得找个大人说一下
Well, you have no idea what's happening here.
你真无法想像这里的状况
The stenographer is dressed like a spider.
速记员穿得像蜘蛛
I cannot get anyone to listen to anything I'm --
所有人都没在听我陈述
Mitchell, I can't.
米奇尔 回头说
Lily?
莉莉
Honey, listen.
宝贝 听我说
Daddy can't stay for the parade.
大爸参加不了游行了
But you promised!
你答应过我的
No, I know I did, but it starts later than I thought,
我知道 可是游行开始得太晚
and I have to get to...
我必须去
Football practice! It's fine! Just go!
橄榄球训练 行 你走吧
No, Lily! Wait!
别走 莉莉 等等我
[校车]
Well, she's gone forever.
这下我又找不到她了
Gloria, what happened to my hair?
歌洛莉亚 我头发去哪了
Ay, no. Please. I cannot have this conversation again.
拜托 咱们不说这行不
Yes, Jay, time is cruel.
是的 杰 时间就是杀猪刀
My Prince Charming wig -- it's gone.
我扮白马王子的假发 不见了
Okay, what do you think --
你们觉得哪个好
Handsome Hawaiian or sexy Scotsman?
帅气夏威夷人还是性感苏格兰人
I can't do this right now.
现在没时间跟你说
Come on, Jay --
拜托 杰
this is my farewell tour
这可是我最后一次
of trick-or-treating in the neighborhood.
在邻里间玩"不给糖就捣乱"
I have to go out strong.
我的造型必须要很抢眼
Or should I just do what people are expecting?
还是我应该扮成别人所期待的那样呢
Stay home 'cause you're 20?
别去要糖吃 因为你已经二十岁了
Jay, please don't be mean to Manny.
杰 不要对曼尼这么刻薄
Maybe Stella took your wig
可能是斯黛拉把你的假发
and buried it in the yard.
叼到后院埋起来了
I saw her playing with it earlier.
之前我看到她在玩那个
What? Why didn't you take it from her?
什么 你为什么不把它抢过来
I don't understand your relationship with her.
我不了解你们之间的关系
You let her lick your feet.
你还让她舔你的脚
Who is that possibly hurting?
那有什么关系
What am I gonna do now?
我现在该怎么办
Prince Charming had hair!
白马王子是有头发的
Please. We don't really know that for sure.
得了吧 这事我们又不能确定
There weren't cameras back then.
那个时候又没有照相机
Maybe he had to be charming because he was bald.
也许就是因为他光头才必须要更迷人呢
You really think it's appropriate
你觉得把你未成年女儿
to be strapping your teenage daughter to a gurney?
绑在医用轮床上合适吗
If we win, it is.
只要能赢就行
I may have to take a pee break soon.
待会我要去厕所
Ooh. Here. Use this bedpan.
在这 用这个便盆
I'm kidding. That's gross.
我开玩笑的 那多恶心
I put candy in it. Here.
我把糖放在里面 拿着
Luke.
卢克
Luke!
卢克
I think I fell asleep.
我刚才好像睡着了
This thing is like a Temple Grandin hug.
这玩意就像自闭症专家发明的拥抱机器
Haley, sweetie, uh, gown's on backwards.
海莉宝贝 衣服穿反了
Oh, no. It's cuter this way.
没有 这样更可爱
Sexy people go crazy, too, you know.
性感的人也会发疯 知道吗
Read a People magazine.
去看看《人物》杂质上的报道
Phil.
菲尔
You're not even gonna try on your doctor costume?
你连试都不试一下你的医生服装吗
Nope.
是的
But we're gonna win.
但我们要赢了
Doesn't that make you happy?
这难道不会让你感到高兴吗
Do I look happy?
我看起来像高兴吗
You got a problem, lady.
你有麻烦了 女士
This obsessive need to be dark and scary --
这种暗黑恐怖的偏执感
you can't even stop yourself.
你自己根本都停不下来了
I can stop whenever I want.
我什么时候想停 就会停
Well, I'm not getting sucked in.
我无法融入这种气氛
I'm having the Halloween that I wanted.
我要过自己想过的万圣节
What is all this?
这些都是什么
Is this supposed to be funny?
这是要表现得很滑稽吗
No, it's supposed to be scary.
不 应该是很可怕
No, it's supposed to be awesome.
不 应该是很奇妙
You know, I could tell that you guys
知道吗 其实我看得出来
didn't love us moving in next door.
你们并不喜欢我们搬过来
Maybe 'cause Ronnie deals pot
可能因为罗尼是卖大麻的
or maybe 'cause of my confederate-flag bikini.
也可能因为我的星条旗比基尼
I don't know, but --
我不知道 但是
But I thought we were becomin' friends.
但是我以为我们在慢慢成为朋友
I was gonna propose a joint Thanksgiving, but...
我还准备邀请你们一起过感恩节 可是
This is really low.
这招简直太低级了
No, honey, it's okay.
不 亲爱的 没事的
No, it's not okay, Ronnie!
不 怎么会没事 罗尼
It's rude and it's cruel!
这太无礼 也太残忍了
I wish we had our old house
真希望我们的老房子还在
so we could drive it away
这样就能马上把家开走
as far as possible!
开得越远越好[房车]
Oh, my goodness. What was that?
天哪 这是演的哪一出
Amber gets touchy about this stuff.
安布尔对这事很敏感
Uh, she --
她...
she spent six months in a cuckoo farm in Nevada.
她在内华达州的一间疯人院待过半年
I'm sorry. She gets mad when I say that.
对不起 我这样说她会生气的
It was in Utah.
是在犹他州
Oh, my god.
天哪
We -- we had no idea. I swear.
我们真的不知道 我发誓
I-it's cool.
没关系
I'll just...give her a box of Cap'n Crunch
我会给她一盒嘎吱船长麦片
and set her in front of the fish tank.
再把她放到鱼缸前面
That seems to calm her down.
那会让她平静下来
- Okay. - Okay.
-好吧 -好吧
We have to shut it down. We got to shut it down.
我们得清理掉这些 我们得清理掉这些
Now, when she said "Joint thanksgiving,"
她说"感恩节一起过"[大麻烟卷感恩节]
do you think that she meant --
你觉得她是不是指...
- No. - Okay.
-不是 -好吧
Each of these companies
每一间公司
funneled unreported funds into the same account.
都把未上报的资金存入同一个账户
Now, I believe this chart makes clear
我相信这张图表可以使这个
the intricate web of deceit.
复杂骗局的网络清晰化
Okay, I heard it.
好的 我听到了
I'm -- I'm gonna rephrase that.
我 我重新叙述一遍
These companies conspired
这些公司密谋
to defraud numerous innocent people,
欺骗众多的无辜民众
not to mention the Internal Revenue Service.
还有国内收入署
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
对不起 对不起
Your honor, may we approach?
法官阁下 可以上前吗
If you must.
如果你一定需要的话
You see what's happening here, right?
你看到这里发生了什么 对吧
You're losing your fifth case in a row?
你连续输五场官司了
Fourth. And --
四场
Who said -- am I losing?
谁说的 我要输了吗
Um, I just feel that the -- the jury
我认为 陪审团
might be a little bit distracted by, um...you know.
会被那个分散注意力 你知道的
Please let the record show that counsel is nodding his head
记录员请记录下来 辩方律师
towards the court stenographer, Holly.
朝法庭速记员奥利点头
Your honor, opposing counsel's
法官阁下 辩方律师是想抓住
grasping at straws
最后一棵救命稻草
because he's losing again.
因为他又要输了
Oh, come on! Come on!
拜托 拜托
She's dressed like a giant spider!
她穿得像个大蜘蛛
I need the jury to focus on the details of this case,
我需要陪审团集中注意力到案情上
not some ridiculous costume.
而不是这身奇装异服
I'm sorry. You're probably a very nice person.
抱歉 你可能是个很好的人
Very well.
好吧
Holly, would you please remove the costume?
奥利 你能把装扮去掉吗
Thank you.
谢谢
Ladies and gentlemen, I apologize for the delay.
女士们先生们 很抱歉要延时了
At the request of counsel,
根据律师要求
the court stenographer will now remove the costume.
法庭速记员将脱去装扮
That redhead's no fun.
这个红头发真扫兴
They hate you.
他们讨厌你
A-as I was saying, um,
根据我之前所说
these companies stole from countless innocent people,
这些公司窃取了无数无辜民众的钱
and, you know,
各位知道
if someone had dipped into my nest egg like that, uh...
如果有人像那样伸手掏我的蛋
I'd be awful grouchy.
我肯定会怒不可遏
Number four.
连输第四场
Here you go.
给你
What are you supposed to be?
你扮的是什么[你本来应该怎样]
Born into another family.
生在别人家里
She is Tess McGill,
她扮的是苔丝·麦克吉尔
feminist heroine from te 1980s classic
八十年代经典《打工女郎》里的
"Working Girl".
女权主义者
You should check it out sometime.
有机会要去看看哦
In a few years.
过几年吧
There is some light vacuuming in underpants.
有用吸尘器吸小鸡鸡的镜头
Keep up the good work!
继续努力
How's it going here?
这边情况如何
I look stupid!
我看起来很蠢
These puppies are making it impossible
这些小狗狗让我没法
for me to stay mad at you.
再生你的气
Stupid, adorable puppies.
愚蠢又可爱的狗狗们
Welcome to AwesomeLand,
欢迎来到奇妙乐园
where the only thing to fear is fun itself.
这里你唯一需要害怕的是乐趣本身
Claire, I know this isn't the Halloween you wanted,
克莱尔 我知道这不是你想要的万圣节
but can you try to sell it?
可你能至少做个样子吗
I'm sorry, honey.
对不起 亲爱的
I got mad at you and I upset Amber,
我冲你发火 还伤害了安布尔
and all because Ronnie called me a soccer mom.
就因为罗尼叫我"孩奴"
What is wrong with me?
我是什么毛病
Nothing.
你没病
I hate it when people assume things about me
我也很讨厌别人胡乱下一些
that aren't true --
错误的结论
Like because I'm pretty, I'm stuck-up.
比如因为我漂亮 我就一定很傲慢
When people do that to me, I'm just like,
要是有人那么对我 我就会说
"Shut up, troll. Why am I even talking to you?"
闭嘴 混蛋 我为什么要跟你说话
I do not like being pigeonholed.
我不喜欢被人分类
It's obvious, mom --
很明显 妈妈
You use Halloween as a way to show people you have edge.
你通过万圣节来告诉大家你也是很犀利的
It's like accountants who buy a harley.
就像会计师买了台哈雷机车
She's right.
她说得对
Being scary is my motorcycle.
扮恐怖就是我那部机车
That's my Tess.
这才是我的苔丝
I knew my farewell tour would be emotional,
我的告别之旅可能带了太多情绪
but at least I can say I did it my way.
但至少我做能说自己做到了我想做的
You've said that four times.
你已经说了四遍了
You know he had other songs?
你知道他别的歌吗
Nice costume. Ben Franklin, right?
妆化得不错 是富兰克林吧
What? No! Prince Charming.
你开什么玩笑 这是白马王子
Oh. Sorry.
好吧
I guess I just picture Prince Charming with hair.
我以为白马王子是有头发的
We all do, but I lost my wig,
我也这么认为 但是我的假发丢了
And I don't have any, so...
我头发也掉光了
Well, you know, there are
好吧 其实有些
some pretty effective solutions for that.
好方法是可以治谢顶的
- Talking about hair plugs? - Yeah.
-你在说植发 -对啊
Take some from the side and the back, right?
从两边和脑勺取一点移到头顶
You think that would work for me?
你觉得那对我有用吗
It could.
应该会
But you might want a second opinion from an actual doctor.
但是你最好咨询一下真正的医生
Excuse me.
打扰一下
Did you just ask that fake doctor about hair plugs?
你刚才和这个装医生的讨论植发吗
No! You know how you struggle with the language.
没有 你知道你的英文不太好
- Jay. - Damn it, Gloria.
-杰 -该死 歌洛莉亚
I miss having a head full of hair.
我很怀念有头发的日子
And don't act like you don't miss it, too.
还有不要表现得好像你不希望我有头发
When we got married,
我们结婚的时候
you had four more hairs than you do now.
你就比现在多了四根头发
This is not a surprise to me.
你这个样子我一点都不吃惊
What about today? Hmm? Earlier?
那今天早些时候呢
When we were not napping?
我们没在打盹的时候
When you were a little extra-enthusiastic?
当你性致高昂的时候
Because you were enthusiastic.
那是因为你兴致高
You went out and bought costumes for all of us,
你给我们所有人买了万圣节装扮
you were singing.
你还在唱歌
For once, you were not like, "I don't want to do this.
至少这次你没有说"我才没兴趣呢"
"I just want to sit at home, watch golf,
我只想在家里边看高尔夫球
And eat my 10-layer dip."
边吃我的墨西哥式十层开胃菜
Just five. Five layers.
五层 只有五层
One layer is enough, Jay.
一层就足够了 杰
I loved that you were having fun with us.
我超爱你和我们一起玩
A happy husband --
一个快乐的老公
that's what is sexy to me.
对我来说才是最性感的
So you don't think I look like Ben Franklin?
所以你不觉得我像富兰克林吗
Oh, yes! That's who it is!
对了 原来是他
The man from the $100 bill -- my favorite!
一百美金钞票上那个男人 我的最爱
All right, Happy Halloween.
好吧 万圣节快乐
That's your costume? A big nose?
那就是你的万圣节装扮吗 一个大鼻子
All right, you know, cool it.
听着 别说那么多废话
I've had a rough day.
我今天过得很惨
You think you're the first SpongeBob I've seen?
你以为你是我今天见的第一个海绵宝宝吗
I'm missing Halloween.
要错过万圣节的欢乐了
All right, honey, if daddy's not home in five minutes,
亲 如果大爸五分钟之内不回来的话
I will take you trick-or-treating, okay?
我就带你去要糖好不
Okay! I made it!
我回来了
Football practice ran late, sweetie.
橄榄球训练延时了 亲爱的
Just give me two minutes. I'm so sorry.
再给我两分钟 我很抱歉
Whatever.
随便
I bet all the full-size candy bars are gone.
我敢说套装糖果肯定都发光了
- Lily. - Nope, nope.
-莉莉 -不 不
She has every right, Mitchell.
她有权生气 米奇尔
You know, I've let football consume my life,
我让橄榄球吞噬了我的生活
And I fumbled what's most valuable to me,
我疏漏了对我而言最宝贵的东西
And now I'm stuck!
现在 我卡住了
Can somebody please help me?
能不能来个人帮帮我啊
- Don't help him! - Oh, enough, you two!
-别去帮他 -够了 你们两个
It's like "August: osage county" Up in here.
简直跟《八月: 奥色治郡》电影里一样混乱
- All right, you -- - Where's my head?
-好了 你得... -我的头呢
It's right here. Stop. Just calm down. Okay.
就在这儿 等一下 冷静 好吗
You need to let yourself off the hook, all right?
你别再自责不已了 好吗
You didn't abandon her playing craps.
你又不是抛弃她 自己去玩了
You had to go to work.
你是要去工作
He's always working.
他只顾着工作
No, he's --
不 他...
He is not always working, Lily.
他并没有只顾着工作啊 莉莉
Exhibit "A" -- your shirt,
证物A 你的上衣
which he stayed up all night sewing
他可是熬夜缝了一晚上
so that you would have the perfect costume.
才让你穿上这完美的装扮服
Exhibit "B" --
证物B
Those glasses--two hours on eBay.
你的眼镜 他在易趣网上淘了两小时
Exhibit "C" -- your satchel.
证物C 你的小背包
Daddy's man purse from college
那是二爸读大学时用的挎包
that he had to dig through 10 boxes to find,
他翻了10个杂物箱才找到的
because daddy hid it from him.
因为二爸藏着不想让他找到
But he didn't read the flier!
但他没看那个传单啊
I never read it
我没有看
Because I never saw it!
是因为我根本没见到
- You didn't see the flier? - No!
-你没见到那张传单吗 -没有
Maybe that's because you never got it.
或许是因为你根本没收到
I submit to you...the flier...
我来向你呈上 那张传单
which never made it onto the refrigerator,
根本没被贴到冰箱上
where you are supposed to put things,
你本该把重要文件都贴在那里的
because it wa-a-a-s....
因为它...
It...was...
它...在...
Yes.
找到
Lily, your daddy may have missed the parade,
莉莉 你大爸或许错过了游行
but he was all over Halloween.
但他真是为万圣节用尽了心思
I rest my case.
我的陈述终止
I'm sorry, daddy.
对不起 大爸
I'm sorry, too.
我也该说对不起
I got my win.
我成功胜诉
Trials would be a whole lot easier
如果陪审团里都是
if juries were made up of
像莉莉这样的7岁小女孩
7-year-old girls, like Lily.
那庭审就简单多了
And Cam.
或者像小卡那样的
I know it's not the point,
我知道那不是重点
but we totally would've won.
但我们原本肯定会赢的
Might want to leave that out of your apology.
你在道歉时最好别提这句
Howdy!
你们好啊
Hey, Ronnie. What's up?
嘿 罗尼 你还好吗
Ronnie, hi. Um, I was looking for Amber.
罗尼 我在找安布尔呢
Oh, she's inside.
她在里面呢
No, I ain't!
不 我不在
Knock it off, Amber!
别闹了 安布尔
Amber, hi.
安布尔 你好
Um, listen, I wanted to apologize.
听着 我想道个歉
I had no idea about your history,
我之前完全不知道你过去的经历
and I was being insensitive,
我太不懂得照顾你的情绪了
so I was hoping we could start over.
所以我希望我们能重新和睦相处
That's really sweet.
真的好温暖人心啊
Almost makes me feel bad for making the whole thing up.
都让我为编造那事感到愧疚了
What?!
什么
Trick!
骗到啦
She never been to a nuthouse.
她根本没被关进过疯人院
No!
不是吧
Yeah, I ain't crazy.
是啊 我才没疯呢
I mean, I've been to rehab a few times,
我倒是进过几次戒毒所
but that was just for paid vacation.
但那最多算是薪资照拿的度假
You lied just to make me feel bad?
你撒谎 就是为了让我感到愧疚吗
No, no -- we lied
不不 我们撒谎
so that we could win with our zombie house o' whores!
那样我们的"僵尸妓女屋"就能获胜了
That is so messed up.
真是太没有下限了
Did you say "Whores," Or --
你刚刚说的是"妓女"还是...
No, no. It ain't messed up.
不不 那可不叫没下限
The saying is "Trick or treat."
本来的说法就是"不给糖就捣蛋"
This is the trick part.
我们这玩的就是"捣蛋"
Our yard's full o' dead whores.
我们的院子里都是死妓女
You got a santa.
你的院子里却是圣诞老人
Yep -- "Whores." I heard it again.
好吧 我听清了 是妓女
Why are we not talking about this?
我们何不谈谈这个呢
There will come a day when you will pay for this.
总有一天 你们会为此付出代价的
You won't know when,
你们不知道是什么时候
and you won't know how,
也不知道是什么方式
but you will feel it.
但你们会亲身感受到的
That chick is scary.
那个小妞好吓人
Thank you.
谢谢
You have no idea.
你完全无法想象
You know, they just make it impossible to find him.
厂家故意画的让你找不到他
It's cruel and inappropriate.
那很残忍 也很不合适
It just sets children up to fail,
那让孩子们注定只能失败
and it destroys their self-esteem.
那会摧毁他们的自尊心
- Right there. - Is he there?
-就在那儿 -在吗
Is -- where --
在哪儿呢
Where did she point? Where did she p--
她刚刚指的哪儿 指的哪儿啊
Now I look like Rod Stewart.
现在我看上去像歌手罗德·斯图尔特了
Thanks a lot.
谢你了啊
I have a head for business and a bod for sin.
我有着商业的头脑 诱人犯罪的身体
Yes, you do.
是啊 没错
Ew! This is a common area!
真恶心 这可是公共区域呢