摩登家庭 第七季 Modern Family Season 7 第19集: Man Shouldn't Lie

上映日期: 2,015

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧

导演: James Alan Hensz

演员: 艾德·奥尼尔 / 索菲娅·维加拉 / 朱丽·鲍温 / 泰·布利尔 / 杰西·泰勒·弗格森 / 艾瑞克·斯通斯崔特 / 萨拉·海蓝德 / 阿芮尔·温特 / 诺兰·古德 / 里克·罗德里格兹 / 奥布里·


台词
That staycation beard's really taking shape, dad.
宅度假胡子非常有型啊 老爸
It's starting to trap food.
开始会黏吃的了
Yep.
是啊
It's gone from itchin' to bitchin'.
已经从痒变得难受了
And you're still rocking the sweats.
你还在穿这身运动服
Every day this week.
一周都没换
Same underwear?
内裤都不换吗
What underwear?
什么内裤
Hold that thought.
等下继续聊
Do I have to?
还要继续聊吗
Mayor's office. City of Phila-Dunphy-a.
菲城市长办公室
I'm sorry. I just got done.
抱歉 我刚下班
My computer crashed,
我的电脑坏了
and we got four pallets of hinges from Taiwan
共从台湾运来的四架板转轴
with faulty riveting.
铆接又出了问题
At least your story's riveting.
至少你的故事很吸引人[铆接]
It's clever. I'll tell you later.
好搞笑 等下给你解释
Hey, why is the minivan in the driveway?
为什么小货车停在咱家停车道上
You parked me in this morning.
你今天早上把我堵在里面了
I was running late for a meeting,
我那时候开会快迟到了
so I just took Haley's Corolla.
所以我就开了海莉的花冠去的
Fun.
好玩
It would be if it didn't smell like
要是闻起来不像
the inside of Bob Marley's laundry hamper.
鲍勃·马利的洗衣篮那就真还不错
Anyway, I've got a bunch more calls to make.
总之我还得再打好几个电话
I'm not gonna have time to cook tonight.
今天晚上没时间做饭了
We could go out.
我们可以去外面吃
There's that new restaurant -- Sliders.
新开了家餐馆叫滑板鞋
The gimmick is they built it on a slant,
噱头就是餐馆开在一个斜坡上
and the waiters all wear socks.
所有服务员都只穿袜子
That doesn't sound good at all.
听起来不怎么样啊
Can you just order something?
你能叫点外卖吗
Yeah, you got it.
好啊 没问题
Great.
太好了
What are you doing?
你在干嘛
Run away, little dog.
走开 小狗
Fine. Go around you.
好吧 我绕开就是了
You're not gonna move.
你不会走的
'Cause I'm not stopping for you.
因为我不会为你停车的
I'm stopping for you.
我会为你停车的
Damn.
该死
Move it!
快走啊
Seriously?
真不走吗
Don't forget you have to watch Joe while we have company.
别忘了客人来的时候 你要照看乔哦
Again?
又要吗
Yes, again.
对 又要
What is the problem?
有什么问题吗
He always wants to watch his show
他老想看他的节目
"Mystery Kidz," With a "Z."
《神秘孩纸》 是"纸"哦
It's insufferable.
太让人受不了了
Now you know what I felt
现在你明白
when I had to watch your favorite show.
我陪你看你最喜欢的节目时的感受了吧
"Masterpiece Theater"?
《经典剧场》吗
It was hosted by a creepy puppet.
节目主持人是一只可怕的木偶
That was Alan Cumming.
那是艾伦·卡明
Ay, Jay, you have to add two more chairs.
杰 你得再多搬两把椅子出来
For who?
给谁
It's us, the McClouds, and the Sharps.
我们俩 麦克克劳兹夫妇 夏普斯夫妇
I also invited my friend Dana and her husband, Reece.
我还请了我朋友戴娜和她丈夫瑞斯
Reece? Who's Reece?
瑞斯 瑞斯是谁
I just told you. Dana's husband.
我刚跟你说了啊 戴娜的老公
I met her at the PTA lunch,
我在家长教师联谊会午餐时认识她的
and she's the only woman in the anti-bullying campaign
她是反欺霸社团中唯一一个
that I don't want to punch in the face.
我不想揍的女人
Why would I want these people in my house
我为什么要请那俩人来我家里
messing up my poker game?
搅了我的扑克局
Maybe you'll meet new friends.
这样你就可以认识新朋友了啊
We've been over this before. I don't want any new friends.
我们以前就说过了啊 我不想认识什么新朋友
I have the exact-right number of friends.
我的朋友数量刚刚好
Jay, your friends have been around
杰 你的朋友都是
since before the movies could talk.
从默片时代过来的了
I don't think it's the worst idea
我觉得开始找一些备胎
to start getting some backups.
也不失为一个好主意
家 庭
摩 登
第七季 第十九集
Hey, Daddy, what's a lowest common denominator?
老爸 什么是最小公分母[特征人群]啊
- Reality TV. - That's hilarious,
-真人秀 -好好笑
but I've got a quiz tomorrow.
但我明天要考试了
What is that noise?
什么声音
Let me remind you that it's been weeks
我提醒你一下 已经有好几周
since we've had a tenant up there.
楼上没人租了
So you rented it to a rock band?
所以你就租给一个摇滚乐队
A Christian rock band.
一个基督教摇滚乐队
Oh, good. Okay, so they're noisy and judge-y.
这下好了 所以他们又吵又爱评论人
Shame on you and your narrow, big-city attitude.
你和你这种狭隘的城市优越感太不要脸了
I've known many accepting people of faith.
我也认识很多有信仰的开明人士
And I've been chased into a lake.
我被传教士追到了一片湖里
So I guess we're both entitled to our opinion.
所以我们都有权维持自己的观点
No!
Absolutely not.
绝对不行
Come in.
This is Mitchell, and the music sounds great.
这是米奇尔 音乐太棒了
Just wondering if you could turn it down a-a skosh.
就是想问问你们有没有可能稍微小点声
Yeah, of course. We're sorry.
当然可以 很抱歉
Just giving the guy upstairs a taste of our new song.
只是想给楼上的哥们感受一下我们的新歌
He means God.
他是说上帝
Really? There's no third floor I don't know about?
是吗 真的没有我不知道的三楼吗
We love the place, by the way.
顺便提一嘴 我们很喜欢这里
It's just scrumptious.
真的非常漂亮
Good! Good!
很好 很好
So, you guys are a Christian rock band?
所以你们是基督教摇滚乐队是吧
Water to Wine. Yeah, that's us.
化水为酒乐队 没错 就是我们
Well, I hope you're not expecting
我希望你们不会把
to bring all your groupies back here.
你们的粉丝们都带来这里吧
Don't worry.
别担心
The Soldiers of the Lamb Church
羔羊教堂的士兵
forbids premarital relations.
禁止婚前关系
Of course. But I can think of a few ladies
当然 但是我也能想到几个
I wouldn't mind multiplying with
在我们长老给过祝福后
after our elders give us their blessings.
我愿意与她生小孩的姑娘
I heard that.
我听到了哦
We love girls!
我们爱姑娘
As long as you guys are here, I need an outsider's opinion.
正巧你们来了 我需要点外人的意见
I'm working on a song,
我在写一首歌
but these guys think it's too soft.
但是这些家伙觉得这歌太温柔了
Do you mind?
介意听一下吗
Lay it on us, bro.
来吧 兄弟
*Hiding for so long*
*隐藏已久*
*The real me, I don't belong*
*不属于我的真实自我*
*I'm not myself, I never was*
*我不是自己 从未曾是*
*I cry at night and all because*
*我在黑夜哭泣 都因为*
*I'm trapped on a secret path*
*我困在一条秘密的小路中*
*I need a holy bath*
*我需要圣浴*
*To wash away the sins I hide*
*洗刷我隐藏的罪孽*
*To douse the fire I feel inside*
*浇熄我内心深处的小火焰*
Aw, dang it, Dex, you're bumming me out!
该死 戴克斯 你这样我很不爽
Calm down, Coop.
冷静 库普
Just 'cause we're in the city
我们进了城
doesn't mean we got to talk like it.
不代表我们就能随心所欲说话
I'm so sorry.
我很抱歉
You know what, Dex, I like that song.
你知道吗 戴克斯 我喜欢这首歌
Yeah. What's the title?
是啊 歌名是什么
I call it "A Cry for Help."
我叫它《求助》
- Did you hear that? -Yeah, I'm standing right here.
-你听到了吗 -当然 我就在这呢
You're back again?
你又回来了吗
Missed you, too.
我也想你了
Sanjay's home this weekend.
桑杰这周末回家了
It's kind of a big day for us -- our first anniversary.
今天是我们一个重要的日子 一周年纪念日
Look what I got him.
看看我给他准备了什么
It's a hadrosaur metacarpal
这是一支鸭嘴龙掌骨
for his dinosaur bone collection.
他喜欢收集恐龙骨头
Too much?
太过了吗
Well, what's the equivalent gift if you guys were normal?
如果你们都是正常人这是什么等级的礼物
Like, a Starbucks card or a Rolex?
是星巴克礼品卡还是劳力士
Kind of like a really nice microscope.
大概相当于一架很棒的显微镜吧
You're not helping.
说了也白说
I thought the gift for a first nerd anniversary was inhaler.
我还以为书呆子的周年纪念应该是呼吸器
Where's your dad?
你们老爸呢
Upstairs. Why?
在楼上 怎么了
You got us a dog?!
你给我们买了狗
No, no! It's a stray,
不 它只是迷路了
and we are not keeping him.
我们不会留下它的
Be quiet.
安静点
Your dad cannot know he's here.
别让你们老爸知道
If he sees him, he'll get all attached,
他要是看到一定会喜欢上它
and there's no getting rid of it.
我们就不可能把它送走了
Oh, it'll be like Luke all over again.
就跟卢克一样
At least they were married when they had me.
至少他们有我的时候已经结婚了
You ruined mom's life.
你毁了妈妈的生活
Stop. I am now very happy I have all of you.
停 我现在很高兴有你们
But I just can't take care of another living creature.
可是我没办法再多照顾一个生物了
Then why'd you bring it home?
那你为什么还带它回家
I couldn't leave it in the street.
我没法把它留在街上
Claire, is that you?
克莱尔 是你吗
Take care of it.
照顾好它
I'm not gonna kill a dog.
我不会把狗狗养死的
Hide it in your room.
把它藏进你房间
Is that what I think it is?
是像我想的一样吗
Uh, no.
不是
Yeah, pizza's here.
没错 披萨到了
How you doing?
你好
What was that?
你们干嘛呢
I'm the pizza monster!
我是披萨怪
It's this new character I'm doing.
这是我的新角色
I love it. I really love it.
我喜欢 我真的很喜欢
I didn't really love it.
我其实不怎么喜欢
It felt a little close to my Chicken Pot Pirate.
感觉跟我的"鸡锅海盗"有点像
It's a mystery.
那是个不解之谜
Who's that?
那是谁
Noni. She can be invisible.
诺尼 可以隐身
Who's that?
那又是谁
Gogo.
勾勾
He can jump off of buildings.
他能跳下高楼
This is the most unrealistic show I've ever seen.
这是我看过最不现实的节目
Who's that?
那又是谁
Yes, great. I will open the gate.
是 太好了 我现在开大门
Reece. Probably can't even work a gate.
瑞斯 可能连修门都不会
Maybe you'll like him.
你可能会喜欢他
He's the Kings' dentist.
他是国王的牙医
Well, hoity-toity. I'm the emperor's closet maker.
那我还是皇帝的橱柜制造商呢
冰球规则允许打架 运动员也因此经常缺牙烂嘴
The L.A. Kings hockey team.
洛杉矶国王冰球队
Kings' dentist. Why does he say it like that?
国王的牙医 为什么他要这么说
What, is he trying to be all fancy?
因为这样听起来很酷炫吗
He didn't say anything. I said it.
他什么都没说 是我说的
- Hello. - Hi.
-你好 -你好
Dana, Reece, this is my husband, Jay.
戴娜 瑞斯 这是我先生杰
- Hi, Reece. How are you? - Hey, Jay.
-你好 瑞斯 -你好 杰
Dana, come with me to the kitchen
戴娜 跟我来厨房吧
while the boys get to know each other.
让男生们互相了解一下
All right.
Did you hear they're thinking
你听说了吗
of eliminating cursive at the school?
他们在考虑在学校里禁脏话
All of it, or just the "F" Word?
所有脏话 还是艹字头那个
I brought you some Scotch.
我给你带了瓶威士忌
That's quite a bottle. Thank you.
这瓶是好酒 谢谢
Gloria tells me you're the Kings' dentist.
歌洛莉亚跟我说你是国王队的牙医
Well, when you say it like that, it sounds so hoity-toity.
你提到这个的态度感觉好拽
Why don't we crack that open?
不如把酒开了吧
And do you have any Cohiba Robustos?
你这有古巴高希霸罗拔图雪茄吗
Oh, I wish, but, you know, they're impossible to find.
我也想有 可是这牌子基本找不到了
Well, look at that.
瞧瞧看
I just found two.
我刚找到两支
Okay, the guy wasn't all bad,
好吧 这人还挺不错的
but I couldn't let Gloria know
可我不能让歌洛莉亚知道
or it would open the door for a whole bunch of new things
不然她就会开始逼我去做一大堆
I don't want to do --
我不想做的事
Trendy restaurants,
比如试新餐厅
movies about how women feel about crap.
关于女性一些无聊事情感觉的电影
And who needs it?
谁需要那些啊
As if this week wasn't bad enough,
如果这周还不够惨的话
now my hardware supplier in Brussels is flip-flopping.
我们在布鲁塞尔的硬件供应商又变卦了
Sounds like you're dealing with a real Belgian waffle.
看来你最近吉卦不怎么多啊
Is that a dog?
那是狗叫吗
What? No.
什么 不是
That sounds like a dog.
听起来像狗叫
You will do anything
为了不听我说话
to avoid hearing me talk about work, won't you?
你什么事情都做得出来 对吗
I'm -- I'm just gonna go cool off downstairs. Yep.
我要下楼冷静一下
Honey?
亲爱的
She is right.
她说的没错
Sometimes I don't listen.
有时候我不想听她说话
That's what she said, right? I don't listen?
她是这么说的对吧 我不听她说话
Did you get out?
你怎么出来了
Oh, come on, now.
快过来
Honey?
亲爱的
Sweetheart?
甜心
I am so sorry.
我很抱歉
It's fine, Phil, really. Just go back to bed.
没关系 菲尔 你回去睡吧
I just... need some time to myself.
我只是需要一点时间静一静
Y-You know I cry when you cry.
你一哭我也想哭了
I'll be upstairs.
我会上楼的
You okay?
你没事吧
It's just -- It's been a lot.
只是 最近太多事了
I love you.
我爱你
Hey, Dex. How are you?
戴克斯 你好吗
You okay?
你没事吧
Yeah, I was just admiring your garden.
我没事 在欣赏你们的花园而已
Hey, come on in.
快进来吧
So, uh, where is the rest of the gang?
其他人呢
Oh, they're out on a prayer jog.
参加祷告晨跑了
It's not really my thing.
我不太喜欢
Is -- Is that something that happens a lot
会经常发生吗
where -- where you feel different?
你觉得自己格格不入的情况
Hi, Dex.
你好吗 德克斯
Hey, Mitchell.
米奇尔
Can I have you help me over here for just a second?
能不能过来帮我个忙 很快就好
Uh, okay.
好吧
What are you doing?
你在干什么
He was clearly reaching out.
他明摆着想寻求帮助
He was admiring our garden.
他在欣赏我们的花园
Nobody admires our garden.
没人会欣赏我们的花园
It's a dead cactus with a grocery bag stuck to it.
里面只有颗粘着购物袋的死仙人掌
What is going on with you?
你怎么回事
You're the one who never wants
你不是一直不想
to get involved in people's lives.
掺和别人的生活吗
Don't you see?
你看不出来吗
He feels trapped by those guys.
他觉得被那些人困住了
Oh, the big, bad Bible thumpers?
那些借《圣经》的名义干涉别人生活的坏蛋吗
Here we go again.
又来了
I'm just saying you could read his song
我只是说可以把他的歌
"A Cry for Help"
《求助》
as a cry for help.
解读成是求助
Mitchell, I'm sorry you got chased into a lake,
米奇尔 你被传教士逼到湖里去了
but some of the kindest, most loving,
我认识的一些最善良最有爱
generous people I've ever known were churchgoers.
最慷慨的人都是信教的
Just...
我就...
Come --
别...
Hey, Dex, do you mind if I make a personal observation?
戴克斯 我能不能发表一下个人见解
If it's about my hips, blame my mother.
如果是想说我的翘臀 怪我妈咯
No, no.
不 不
It's -- It's about the song that you sang yesterday.
是关于你昨天唱的歌
It seemed like you were trying to express something --
你似乎是想表达
some feelings you might be having
你的感受
that you think might not be met with approval
而这些感受似乎
from your..."community."
没有被你们的"小团体"认可
Or it's just a song.
或者就只是首歌
Has nothing to do with his personal situation.
跟他自身情况毫无关联
No, it does.
不 是有关联的
I'm -- I'm sorry. Your pain is real.
不好意思 你的痛是真真切切的
I just feel so guilty.
我只是觉得好有负罪感
I know people will be disappointed.
我知道大家会很失望
No, no, don't feel guilty.
别 别 不要有负罪感
Look, the first step is to say it out loud.
听着 第一步就是要大声说出来
I don't want to be a drummer.
我不想当鼓手
Okay, now say the other thing.
好 继续说
I don't want to be in a band anymore.
我不想再呆在乐队里了
I miss home.
我好想家
I miss my girlfriend.
好想我的女友
- I'm sorry. Whoa. What? - I'm sorry. Your what?
-抱歉 什么 -抱歉 你的什么
It's like a weight has been lifted.
感觉心里一下释然了
Thank you so much, guys.
太感谢你们了
You know, I was just gonna stay inside today,
我今天本想呆在里面的
but I'm really glad I came out.
还好出来了
He doesn't get to say that.
他才不是想说那些
Oh, hey, Joe.
Uh, there's a new "Mystery Kidz" on.
现在在播新一集《神秘孩纸》
No, thanks.
我不看了 谢谢
"No, thanks"?
"我不看了 谢谢"
Aren't you curious who stole Poco's magic wings?
你难道不好奇谁偷了普可的魔法翅膀吗
Not really.
没什么兴趣
But everyone's a suspect.
可是每个人都有嫌疑
The watchmaker hates Poco,
钟表匠讨厌普可
and Mayor Pudding would do anything to stay in office.
布丁市长会不惜一切手段留任
How could you not want to see what happens?
你怎么会不想看接下来发生了什么呢
Hello?
Uh, yes. Hold on.
对 等等
Jay, it's Reece.
杰 是瑞斯
You see, Gloria?
你看 歌洛莉亚
Now he's calling me.
现在他开始给我打电话了
This is what I was afraid of.
我怕的就是这个
He called.
他打电话来了
My new friend called.
我的新朋友打电话了
He's taking me to a hockey game.
要带我去看冰球比赛
Great.
太棒了
Now I'm stuck going to some boring charity event with Reece.
现在我非得跟瑞斯去一个什么无聊的慈善活动
You see what your mom got me into?
你看你妈给我惹的好事
Jay, come on. Keep an open mind.
杰 别这样 开明点
All we're saying is give Reece a chance.
我们只是觉得要给瑞斯一个机会
Rex.
雷克斯
Scooby.
史都比
Clifford.
克利福德
What are you doing?
你在干吗
Trying to figure out his name.
猜它的名字
What about Dad?
你考虑过老爸吗
Here, Dad.
给 老爸
Nope.
不是
You do not need to figure out his name
不用猜他的名字
because we're going to put these fliers up,
因为我们要去贴启示
寻主启示
and someone's gonna call.
就会有人打电话来了
What happened to the dinosaur bone I got for Sanjay?
我给桑杰的恐龙化石呢
I saw Snoop...
我看到史努比
burying something in the backyard.
在后院埋东西
And you didn't do anything?
你什么都没做吗
I opened the door for him.
我帮它开了门
That bone lasted 65 million years,
那块化石有6500万年的历史
and it can't even last one day in this house?!
在这个家居然撑不过一天
- Claire. - Oh, my God, your father!
-克莱尔 -我的天 你爸来了
The dog -- outside! Outside! Outside!
狗 带出去 出去
Yeah, honey?
怎么了 亲爱的
Sweetheart, about last night.
甜心 昨晚的事
Because I didn't listen with these two ears...
我没用这俩耳朵认真听你说话
Yes.
I want to apologize with these tu-lips.
我想用这些郁金香[俩嘴唇]道歉
Oh, that is very -- That's so sweet of you.
太... 你太好了
Thank you, baby.
谢谢你 宝贝
Great. Oh, is that a tortilla chip right there?
太好了 那是玉米片渣吗
Yeah --
就那
Hola, amigo from yesterday.
你好吗 昨天的朋友
You're not gonna eat that, are you?
你不会要吃吧
No, that would be disgusting.
才不 多恶心
What are these?
这是啥
Oh, that's a -- It's a...
那个是 是
It's a protein snack.
蛋白质零食
You don't have to eat that if you don't like it.
不喜欢的话就别吃了
No.
不会
I like it. Good.
我喜欢 好吃
It's -- It's liver-y.
有肝味[活力]
You take such good care of us.
你太会照顾我们了
Thanks, honey.
谢谢 亲爱的
We should get those flowers in a a vase.
我们应该把花放到花瓶里
No, Phil.
不 菲尔
Not that vase.
别用那个花瓶
Look at me!
看着我
Really look at me.
好好看着我
I feel like I am.
我觉得我在看啊
You're just not getting it, are you?
你还是不明白 对吧
I'm sorry. I need some alone time.
对不起 我想一个人待会
Sorry for knocking on your door so persistently,
抱歉一直敲你家门
but we can't find Dex,
可我们找不到戴克斯了
and all his matching luggage is gone.
他的行李也不见了
Do you have any idea where he is?
你们知道他去哪了吗
I don-- I don't know, Mitchell.
我... 我不知道 米奇尔
Weren't you the last person to talk to him?
最后跟他说话的是你吧
And we haven't got much time.
我们的时间不多了
If we don't have a drummer,
要是我们没有鼓手
we're gonna have to cancel the gig.
就得被迫取消演出
Well, the Lord works in mysterious ways.
我主行事 凡人莫测
- Don't even... - I...
-打住... -我...
Aah, this is devastating.
真是毁灭性打击
If we don't play, we won't get paid,
如果我们不演出 就拿不到报酬
and we don't have enough money to get home.
也就没有足够的钱回家了
Hey, you don't know what Dex is going through.
你们不明白戴克斯正在经历什么
One hath to be true to the way one was born.
人务须遵从本性
Okay, you can't just add "Hath"
得了 你不能随便加个"务须"
and pretend it was in the Bible.
就假装是《圣经》里的话
Well, I guess we better call the venue and cancel the gig.
我想我们得打电话给音乐厅取消演出了
Oh, boy, well, you know.
天啊 好了 你懂的
I could be your drummer.
我可以做你们的鼓手
Oh, God, here we go.
上帝啊 又来了
Really? You play?
真的吗 你会打鼓
Swear to G-dash-D.
我对上面那位发誓
Just play me a few bars. I can pick it up, follow along.
来几段音乐试试 我能跟上节奏
Mr. Cameron, thank you so much.
卡梅伦先生 太感谢你了
You kind of remind me of another special someone
你让我想起某个重要的人
who made a pretty big sacrifice to save us.
他曾为我们做出重大牺牲
Please, do not compare me to your...
拜托 别把我比作你的...
Mr. Bernie Kaufman, our manager.
是伯尼·考夫曼先生 我们的经纪人
He burnt down his shoe store to pay for our first demo.
他烧了他的鞋店[骗保险]赞助我们首张唱片小样
what are you doing?
你在干嘛呢
Oh, God, you take the dog,
天啊 你快把狗抱走
and I'll clean this up, okay?
我把这收拾干净 好吗
Okay.
Honey, I got some vase options.
亲爱的 我找了几个备选花瓶
What happened?
怎么回事
what do you think happened?
你觉得是怎么回事
I think she saw those flowers as the shallow
我觉得她认为送花道歉
transparent gesture they were
是种肤浅的行为
and shredded them to pieces in a justifiable rage.
她有理由一气之下把它们撕烂
Yep.
没错
What have I done to upset her so much?
我做了什么事让她这么生气
Maybe you should look in a mirror
也许你照照镜子
and ask yourself that question.
就能回答自己的问题了
Sweet Teen Wolf, what have I become?
我的老天啊 瞧我变成什么人了
You see that guy?
看见那家伙了吗
I have done so much work on his mouth
我在他的牙上下了不少功夫
that he's paid for the hot tub on my boat.
花费足够付我船上的热水浴缸
Did Kopitar just wave to you?
科皮塔刚才是跟你招手吗
It's the least he can do.
那可不
I'm taking him out fishing this weekend in Catalina.
这周末我要带他去卡特琳娜钓鱼
Hey, hey, do you want to come?
你想来吗
Oh, my God, I'd love to go.
天啊 我当然很愿意去
- Oh, but... - What?
-不过... -怎么了
Last night, before you got there,
昨晚你来之前
Gloria and I got in a big to-do
歌洛莉亚和我大吵了一架
about me not needing new friends.
因为我不想认识新朋友
And now you don't want to admit you were wrong.
现在你不愿意承认自己错了
Wow, do you get me.
你真懂我
Well, it's supposed to be perfect whale-watching weather,
这会儿应该是观赏鲸鱼的好天气
and, uh, oh, yeah,
还有 对了
Gretzky's coming, too.
格雷斯基也会来
The Great One?
有名的那个吗
Not at sharing the binoculars, he isn't.
他不跟人分享望远镜 这点倒臭名昭著
It's killing me I can't go!
真要命 我去不了
Well, here's a crazy idea.
我有个疯狂的主意
Why don't you tell your wife the truth
你干嘛不对你妻子实话实话
and admit you were wrong?
承认你错了
You don't get me like I thought you did.
你没我想的那么懂我
Or...?
要不然呢
Fine. I'll level with her.
好吧 我会跟她说实话的
What is going on?
你是怎么回事啊
Ohh, good, you're not Dad.
太好了 不是老爸
So, how'd it go with Sanjay?
你和桑杰进展得怎么样
Did he remember your anniversary?
他记得你们的纪念日吗
You tell me.
你说呢
After I gave him the fossil,
我把化石送给他之后
he gave me this for romantic weekends up at Stanford.
他给了我这只箱子作为斯坦福浪漫周末的礼物
It looks kind of used.
看起来像是二手货
Do you think it's possible he forgot
你觉得有没有可能他忘了
and just grabbed the first thing that he's...
只是随手拿了一件东西...
Shut up! He loves me!
闭嘴 他爱我的
I can't believe i haven't gotten a single call.
真不敢相信连一个电话都没有
I must have put up a thousand fliers.
我已经贴出无数启示了
Hey, guys.
大伙好啊
Honey.
亲爱的
-Claire. -Yeah.
-克莱尔 -在
I want to talk to you.
我想跟你谈谈
I am so sorry.
我真的很抱歉
I don't listen.
我不听你说话
I try to solve problems with flowers.
光想靠送花解决问题
I do unflattering impressions of you for my friends.
还在朋友面前捏造你的负面形象
And worst of all, I let myself go.
最糟糕的是 我放任自己
So I shaved and put on a suit.
所以我刮了胡子 换了衣服
Oh, honey.
亲爱的
What's that?
那是什么
What?
什么
Oh, my God. You packed a suitcase.
天啊 你收拾了行李
You need some time away.
你要离开一段时间
I guess all this was...
我想我做这一切都...
too little, too late.
太不够了 也太迟了
Well, not the spray tan. That was too much, too long.
但不包括美黑 做得时间太长 也太黑
I think the nozzle was broken.
我觉得那个喷嘴坏了
You're getting this all wrong, and it's all my fault.
你全都理解错了 都是我不好
Okay, look,
好吧 听着
I have been trying to distract you, yes,
我一直拼命躲着你 没错
but because I have been thinking about what was good for me
可那是因为我一直在想着对我有好处的事
and not what might be good for you.
而不是可能会对你有好处的事
So I have no idea
我不知道
if we're ever gonna find out who his real owner is,
我们能不能找到它真正的主人
but if we don't, you can keep him.
如果找不到的话 你可以养着它
Why would I want the Tanksley's dog?
我为什么要养唐克斯里家的狗
What?
你说什么
This is Buddy.
这是巴迪
You know the Tanksley's over on Clifton?
你不知道唐克斯一家搬去克里夫顿了吗
I sold them their house.
我卖掉了他们的房子
Oh, thank God.
谢天谢地
But if you're open to me getting a pet...
不过如果你同意我养宠物的话
Yeah. Of course. Get a dog.
当然同意 养只狗吧
No, I don't want a dog.
不 我不想养狗
I want a cockatoo to take Rollerblading.
我想养只凤头鹦鹉带去滑旱冰
How cool would that be sitting on my shoulder
想象一下 有只凤头鹦鹉站在我肩膀上
my half shirt flapping in the wind?
我的衬衫迎风飘动 那得多酷啊
You're not getting a bird.
你不能养鸟
- Are you serious? - Yeah.
-你是认真的吗 -是
People that have birds
那些养鸟的人
and walk around with them on their shoulders --
让鸟站在他们肩膀上到处走
They look ridiculous.
他们看起来太可笑了
It's obviously a desperate cry for attention.
那完全是为了吸引别人的注意而用力过度
Okay.
好吧
Now I need some time to myself.
现在轮到我需要时间静静了
What are you doing?
你在看什么
Nothing.
没什么
You're watching "Mystery Kidz."
你在看《神秘孩纸》
You said you didn't want to.
你不是说不想看吗
Not with you. You ask too many questions.
是不想跟你一起看 你问题太多了
That's rude.
你这么说很过分
I was only watching as a courtesy.
我可是出于礼貌才看的
What just happened?
刚发生什么了
Wait, who's that?
等等 那是谁
Gloria.
歌洛莉亚
How was the charity event?
慈善会怎么样
I have to talk to you about something.
我有话跟你说
What?
怎么了
I owe you an apology.
我要跟你说声对不起
I have to go to Cleveland this weekend
我这周末要去克利夫兰
for my Aunt Bea's funeral.
参加一个姑妈的葬礼
Nice old lady.
很慈祥的一个老太太
Fell off a cliff.
她从悬崖上摔下去了
I'll -- I'll go with you. I'll start packing right now.
我和你一起去 我马上去收拾行李
No, no, no. You stay here with Joe and Manny.
不 你跟乔和曼尼留在这儿
I'll send you a snow globe.
我会寄个雪花玻璃球给你
Hey, did we have an extra pair of binoculars?
我们有多余的望远镜吗
I saw a weird bird outside.
我看到外面有只奇怪的鸟
Stop with the lies.
别再撒谎了
I really don't understand men.
我真搞不懂男人
Why can't you just admit that you were wrong?
你就不能直接承认你错了吗
It's not a weakness.
这又不是缺点
It's a strength,
这是个优点
and I would love you and respect you more.
我会因此更爱你 更尊重你
Fine.
好吧
I like Reece, and I want to go away with him.
我喜欢瑞斯 我想和他出去玩[私奔]
I knew it!
我就知道
I was right, and you were wrong!
我是对的 你是错的
From now on, we're gonna do new things all the time.
从现在开始 我们要不断尝试新事物
Tomorrow we're going to an Ethiopian restaurant,
明天我们去埃塞俄比亚餐厅吃饭
and then we're gonna watch a movie
然后去看部电影
about a love letter that arrived 30 years late
那电影讲述了一封迟到30年的情书
and changed the life of two women.
改变了两个女人一生的故事
Can I bring Reece?
我能带上瑞斯吗
No!
不行
今夜演出化水为酒乐队
Hey, everyone, let's gather for the preshow prayer.
大家好 我们来一起做表演前祷告吧
Kind of like Madonna and her backup dancers.
就像麦当娜和她的伴舞们一样
Mr. Mitchell, would you like to join us?
米奇尔先生 你想和我们一起吗
Oh, I'm good. Thank you.
不用了 谢谢
All right.
好的
Heavenly Father,
仁慈的上帝
we ask that you make this show super-amazing for all of our fans,
请保佑我们的粉丝万分喜爱今晚的演出
and we pray for Dex.
我们还要为戴克斯祈祷
Lord, please guide him.
上帝 请引导他
Give him strength.
给他力量
And let him know that we love and accept him no matter what.
让他知道无论如何我们都爱他 接受他
Mitchell, did you hear that?
米奇尔 你听到了吗
Hey, you know what? Let me in there.
我要加入祷告
I have been a little judgmental, haven't I?
我以前有些武断 对吗
So...
所以
Go ahead.
请继续
- Amen. - Amen.
-阿门 -阿门
Let's do this.
我们上台吧
- Break a leg! - Thank you!
-祝你们好运 -谢谢
Here.
给你
What's this?
这是什么
If the mood strikes you,
如果你有兴致
why don't you join us onstage,
何不跟我们一起上台
make some joyful noise?
制造些欢快的声音
Ladies and gentlemen, Water to Wine!
女士们先生们 有请化水为酒乐队
One, two, three, four.
一 二 三 四
*The world may be flat*
*世界也许是平的*
*But it's always changin'*
*但它总在变化*
*So many sins from topics that are rangin' *
*言语中罪恶在蔓延*
*Devil's done with breakfast, and his evil is ragin' *
*魔鬼用毕早餐 恶性在肆虐*
*Which is why. Which is why*
*这就是为什么 这就是为什么*
*Which is why. Which is why*
*这就是为什么 这就是为什么*
*Man shouldn't lie*
*人们不该撒谎*
*Man shouldn't lie*
*人们不该撒谎*
*Man shouldn't lie with another man*
*人们不该对他人撒谎*
*Man shouldn't lie*
*人们不该撒谎*
*Man shouldn't lie*
*人们不该撒谎*
*Man shouldn't lie with another man*
*人们不该对他人撒谎*
*There's a party in hell*
*地狱中在开派对*
*And the drinks are always flowing*
*酒一直在流淌*
*I think we all know the kind of people that are going*
*我想我们认识所有参加派对的人*
*Man shouldn't lie*
*人们不该撒谎*
*Man shouldn't lie*
*人们不该撒谎*
*Man shouldn't lie with another man*
*人们不该对他人撒谎*
*Unless they really love each other*
*除非他们相爱*
*Man shouldn't lie*
*人们不该撒谎*
*Man shouldn't lie*
*人们不该撒谎*
*Man shouldn't lie with another man*
*人们不该对他人撒谎*
*The Jesus I know loves everyone*
*我所认识的耶稣博爱世人*
*Even if you're gay or straight*
*不管你是直是弯*
*Doesn't matter about your sexuality-y-y*
*不在乎你性取向如何*
I'm just saying that maybe,
我只是说也许
before you join the French resistance,
法国革命之前
you walk the 15 feet to your neighbor's house
一个人才可以走十几米去邻居家
and ask her did she get your damn love letter.
问问她是否收到过自己的一封情书
For someone that says
某些人说了
that they don't want to talk about the movie,
不想谈论电影
that's all you seem to be talking about.
但你刚刚谈的不是电影是什么
I think it's better
至少那电影
than putting this yellow mush in my mouth.
要比把这坨黄黄的糊塞进嘴里强
Yeah, maybe if you opened up your mind,
如果你能摒弃成见
you would see that this is actually delicious.
你会发现其实这些很美味
It was disgusting,
其实难吃极了
But I can never let Jay know that he is right.
但我不能让杰知道他是对的
The food is terrible and if I'm being honest,
食物难吃极了 但老实说
the movie sort of stays with me.
电影我还挺喜欢的