摩登家庭 第七季 Modern Family Season 7 第7集: Phil的超性感房屋 Phil's Sexy, Sexy House

上映日期: 2,015

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧

导演: James Alan Hensz

演员: 艾德·奥尼尔 / 索菲娅·维加拉 / 朱丽·鲍温 / 泰·布利尔 / 杰西·泰勒·弗格森 / 艾瑞克·斯通斯崔特 / 萨拉·海蓝德 / 阿芮尔·温特 / 诺兰·古德 / 里克·罗德里格兹 / 奥布里·


台词
Well, I'm off.
我要走了
While I do love our tradition
我很喜欢我们周六
of still getting together on Saturday for thanksgiving leftovers,
依旧要聚在一起吃感恩节剩菜的传统
maybe next time we can order a turkey
也许下次我们可以买一只
that doesn't have its own event horizon.
没有视界[黑洞边界]的火鸡
Oh, well, who cares?
谁在乎
I know it's totally gonna slay them
反正要是在我的天体物理俱乐部里
in my astrophysics club.
大家肯定都会笑死的[爱上的]
First time anyone in that club gets slayed.
有人爱上那种俱乐部的成员才怪呢
Let me give you a hug goodbye.
让我跟你拥抱道别吧
I cannot believe that you're already going to college.
难以相信你居然已经上大学了
It seems like yesterday when you were a little girl
感觉昨天你还只是个学习大学课程的
reading at college level.
小姑娘而已
Check you out!
瞧瞧啊
Thanks.
谢谢
I have a hot study partner coming over, so --
我有个超性感的自习搭档要过来 所以...
What are you making, my little chef?
你在做什么呀 我的小厨子
I'm making pasghetti!
我在做利大意面
美国小朋友最爱说错的词
You are adorable.
你真可爱
I remember when I had everyone in the palm of my hand
我还记得当年我用"利大意面"这种三脚猫招数
with a two-foot putt like "Pasghetti."
博取所有大人欢心的风采
We both know you know how to say it.
咱俩都清楚你知道这个词怎么说
Hey, guys, thanks again for helping me to get that listing.
两位 再次感谢你们帮我收拾那栋待售房
Cyril's house.
西里尔的房子
- Pretty sexy, huh? - Ridonk.
-很性感吧 -必须呀
This place makes the playboy mansion
那地方让花花公子豪宅
look like an old folks' home.
像个老头子的家一样
Which I guess it kind of is now.
现在好像是的
Infinity pool, killer views,
超大泳池 超赞视野
state-of-the-art game room, home theater...
最高端的游戏厅 家庭影院
Plus that four-person shower.
再加上那个四人淋浴
Did you know that's where Cyril met his new husband?
你知道西里尔就是在那里认识他的新丈夫的吗
Even the security code's sexy.
连安全码都很性感
Literally. It spells out "Sexy" on the keypad.
真的 按键上写着"性感"
Even I think that's trying too hard,
连我都觉得那有点太拼了吧
and at this point, I'm mostly body spray.
我一般最多用用香体喷雾
And that master bathtub alone has been in four rap videos
单是那个超大浴缸就在四个饶舌视频中出现过
plus a murder re-creation on a "Dateline" special
还有《日界线》特别节目的一个谋杀重演出现过
called "Rub-a-dub Dead."
剧集名叫《按摩到死》
When I was younger,
我小的时候
I was a little embarrassed
我爸是房地产中介的事情
my dad was just a real-estate agent.
让我有点小尴尬
But as I got older, I realized,
但我长大了一点之后 我意识到
Hey, he may not have the coolest job in the world,
他的工作可能不是世界上最酷的
But he puts food on the table
但是他养活了我们
and has access to a bunch of empty houses
而且他还坐拥很多空房子
I can sneak into."
让我能偷偷溜进去
Wow. Nice pool at the three-bedroom in Hillgrove.
希尔格罗夫三居室带的游泳池好赞啊
Well, looky here,
瞧啊
one of my kids showing interest in the family biz.
终于有个孩子对咱们的家庭产业有兴趣了
Oh, I don't know if I'm smart enough for that.
不知道我够不够聪明来干这活
You have to remember so much stuff,
得背这么多东西
like when anyone's gonna be there.
比如什么人什么时候看房
That's what the datebook's for.
日程表就是用来做这个的
Plus you have to remember
而且你还得记住
all of those lock-box combinations.
那么些组合密码
I just use a very special birthday.
我用的都是一个非常特别的生日
Houdini's.
胡迪尼的生日
I left my watch by Cyril's tub.
我的手表落在了西里尔的浴缸边上
I'm usually extra careful not to leave any trace
我一向格外谨慎 不会在老爸的这些房子
that I was at one of my dad's houses,
留下我去过的痕迹
But this tub has 16 pulsating jets,
但是这个浴缸有16个脉冲射流
and the whole floor vibrates
整个缸底都震动着
with something called "Swedish Release".
给人进行瑞典爽身按摩
It took me 20 minutes to find my car in the driveway.
爽得我花了20分钟才找到我的车
I'm so sorry, grandpa.
我很抱歉 外公
I have to go do this thing for work.
我得去工作了
- Thanks. - Hold on.
-谢谢 -等等
No one leaves this house without a bag of meat.
每个人走之前都要拿一袋肉
Bye, honey.
再见 亲爱的
Can you believe how conscientious
你能相信我们的小姑娘现在
our little girl has become?
这么认真工作吗
Racing off to work on a Saturday.
周六还赶去上班
There's a 30% chance she thinks it's friday,
当然有30%的可能是因为她以为今天是周五
But still.
但还是很认真啦
Are you still mad at me?
你还在生我气吗
I lost my cool on Phil last night.
我昨天冲菲尔发脾气了
But in my defense, I had been traveling all day,
但我要解释一下 我昨天奔波了一天
and we had different ideas
结果我们对
about how we were gonna spend the evening.
如何度过夜晚产生了分歧
Get in here right now.
快点进来
Get in this tub, you dirty girl.
快到浴缸里来 你这坏姑娘
Oh, honey, that is so sweet,
亲爱的 你太贴心了
but I've been up since 5:00 a.m.
但我今早5点就起床一直忙到现在
Don't overthink it, babe. Just take the plunge.
别想太多 宝贝 快跳进来吧
Oh, good, you're back.
太好了 你回来了
Could you grab the underwater camera?
你能把水下摄像机拿过来吗
You're bathing with them now?
你在跟它们一起洗吗
They waddled into the garage and got oil on them.
它们跑到了车库 浑身是油
And then when they were in here by themselves,
后来它们自己过来的时候
all they wanted to do was horse around, so...
就是想在这里胡闹 所以...
I spent the morning in Berkeley
我今早跑去伯克利
and the afternoon in Portland.
下午去波特兰
I deserve to feel clean again.
我有权洗个澡干净清爽一下
But now the nice, soothing tub
但现在这个舒适放松
that I've been dreaming about all day
我幻想了一整天的浴缸
is filled with feathers and motor oil and probably bird flu.
到处都是羽毛 机油还很有可能有禽流感
So, no. No. You just sit tight,
所以算了 你坐好了
and I will use the hose in the backyard.
我去用后院里的水管
Could you still grab the camera?
那你还能把摄像机拿过来吗
Okay. I was harsh.
好吧 我是凶了点
But the flight back from Portland was rough.
但从波特兰回来的航班真的太辛苦了
The overheads were packed with foldable bikes,
我头顶的隔板上放着折叠自行车
and I was sitting next to a guy using a typewriter.
我还跟一个用打字机的家伙坐在一起
Still, Phil is really holding on to this one.
不过 菲尔就是不肯原谅我
Well, Phil's mad at me.
菲尔在生我的气
Come here, little girl.
过来 小姑娘
Let me give you a hug.
我来抱抱你
You're not shy with those hugs today, are you?
你今儿个可真舍得自己的拥抱啊
- Oh, and come here. - Oh, me too?
-过来吧 -还有我吗
I don't know what it is,
我不知道怎么回事
But I get so emotional around the holidays.
不过一到节日我的情绪就容易激动
家 庭
摩 登
第七季 第七集
Oh, God.
天哪
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
不 不 不 不 不
Mr. Dunphy? Is that you?
邓菲先生 是你吗
Haley?
海莉
Andy, wh-- uh, what are you doing here?
安迪 你来这里干什么
Setting up for an open house tomorrow.
布置一下明天的参观日
What are you d--
你来这里干...
Splish, splash, who was taking a bath?!
我滴个水神啊 谁用了浴缸
Me.
I snuck over last night, but the faucet leaked,
我昨晚偷偷溜进来 但是水龙头漏水
and I guess I was so mellowed out
我猜我是太过放松了
I forgot to drain the tub.
我忘了把水放干
That's pretty darn mellowed out.
你这放松得真彻底啊
Were you burning incense?
你还熏香了吗
Uh, yep. Sure was. Okay.
是啊 当然了
Well, I'll lay some towels down. You drain the tub.
我去铺几条毛巾 你把浴缸放干
Is it stuck?
堵住了吗
No, I'm checking my makeup in the reflection.
没有 我在倒影里看我的妆花了没
Yes, it's stuck.
当然是堵住了啊
Here. Let me help.
来吧 我来帮你
No, no. I can get it.
不用不用 我可以的
Here. Okay.
来吧 好了
Oh, my god.
天哪
Relax, I'm okay.
放松 我没事
No. Isn't this the tub from the Lil Wayne video?
不 这不是李尔·韦恩视频里的浴缸吗
美国饶舌歌手
I put our clothes in the dryer.
我把我们的衣服放进烘干机了
I made an executive decision --
我做了个行政决策
Went with the Irish mountain dryer sheets.
选了爱尔兰山干燥片
What does an Irish mountain smell like?
爱尔兰山闻起来是什么样的
We'll find out in 30, 35 minutes.
30到35分钟后就知道了[模仿爱尔兰口音]
Hey, uh, don't tell my dad I was here, okay?
别告诉我爸我来过好吗
I suppose I could do you that wee favor.
这种小忙应该没问题[模仿爱尔兰口音]
Do me a second favor...
能再帮我一个忙吗
Yeah, I don't love it, either.
我也不喜欢这个口音
Hey, why were you
你为什么要
taking a bath over here, anyway?
来这里泡澡呢
Oh, I just wanted a few hours to myself.
我只是想要一点私人时间
You know, I live in my parents' basement,
我住在父母家的地下室里
I broke up with Dylan,
跟迪兰分手了
I was depressed about how much I ate at Thanksgiving...
还因为感恩节吃得太多心情抑郁
You broke up with Dylan, huh?
你跟迪兰分手了啊
Yeah. Actually, it was the day
是啊 实际上就是在
that we saw you and Beth at that movie.
我们在电影院看到你和贝丝那天
You guys seemed so great together
你们在一起的感觉特别好
I guess I just thought, "I want that."
我当时就想着 我也想要那样
I am pretty lucky.
我挺幸运的
But for what it's worth,
不过坦白讲
Beth and I are not perfect.
贝丝和我并不完美
Things come up when you plan a wedding.
筹划婚礼的时候问题就暴露出来了
Really? There's such a thing as Mormon drama?
真的有种叫"摩门教剧"的东西吗
There was when Beth's uncle found out
贝丝的叔叔发现我们在接待处
we're serving coffee at the reception.
为客人供应咖啡之后就有了
Plus, she doesn't want me to have a bachelor party.
另外 她不想让我办单身派对
At all?
完全不行吗
It is one night before the rest of your life.
这是你余生之前的最后一晚
- You should do it up. - That's what I said.
-你应该办的 -我也是这么说的
Well, to my mirror, but you're right.
对着镜子里的自己说的 不过你说得对
I deserve one adventure before I settle down.
我应该在安稳下来之前来一场冒险
Look what you did. Here.
你瞧你做了什么 在这
Well, yeah, I mean, you got to do something fun.
你确实该做点有趣的事
Um... maybe you try and fix it.
要不你试试看调好它
Yeah. It should be simple enough.
好吧 应该很简单
O...kay... I did not mean to do that.
好吧 我说的不是这个意思
Um, maybe try this one?
要不试一下这个
Maybe we shouldn't touch any more buttons.
我们最好别再乱按按键了
Right.
是啊
Uh... what were we talking about?
我们刚说到什么来着
Having an adventure.
新的冒险
Oh, God, is that my dad?
天哪 是我爸吗
'tis a fine kettle of fish we're in!
这下糟糕了
Get in the laundry room!
进洗衣间
and sad news from the zoo,
动物园传来坏消息
Chuffa the panda has suffered a m--
熊猫春发患上了...
动物园悲剧
Stop touching stuff!
不要乱碰
Well, you're not shy with those hugs today, are you?
你今儿个可真舍得自己的拥抱啊
I don't know what it is,
我不知道怎么回事
but I get so emotional around the holidays.
不过一到节日我的情绪就容易激动
- Oh, I get it. - I really do.
-我知道了 -我说真的
- I love you. - I love you too.
-我爱你 -我也爱你
Gloria.
歌洛莉亚
So, this year,
所以说今年
we're surprising the family with a trip to Miami.
我们要用迈阿密之行给全家一个惊喜
The travel company needs everybody's driver's license
旅游公司需要所有人的驾照
to book the flight.
好订机票
That's where "sticky fingers" here
这就是为什么我们需要
comes in handy.
这位"妙手空空"了
Everybody has a bad cousin
所有人都有一个坏表亲
that teaches you a few things.
教会你一些事
Like how to smoke, how to pick-pocket,
比如怎么抽烟 怎么偷东西
how to hot-wire a car,
没有钥匙怎么启动车
how to put tacks on your shoe
怎样通过在鞋子里放大头针
when you want to throw off a-a lie-detector test.
改变测谎试验的结果
Which cousin was this?
这是哪一个表亲
I am the cousin.
我就是那个表亲
Bye.
再见
Phil, honey, remember those gutter covers
菲尔 还记得我们一年前
that we ordered like a year ago?
订的水槽盖吗
Good news.
好消息
They shipped!
他们终于发货了
That's exciting.
真棒
Please kill me if I ever find gutter covers exciting.
如果我哪天为水槽盖激动你一定要杀了我
I know. That marriage is staler
我知道 婚姻变得比名模聚会上
than a box of cupcakes at a supermodel retreat.
那一盒纸杯蛋糕还要无味
Oh, hay, Phil!
菲尔
Thank you again for coming!
再次感谢你能来
It was our pleasure. You're always so...
我们的荣幸 你一直都这么
generous to have us!
慷慨地款待我们
Ay, I'm sorry. I didn't wanted to tickle you.
抱歉 我没想挠你痒
It's just that I love how this fabric feel.
只不过我很喜欢这种布料的感觉
What is the name of this material?
这种材料叫什么名字
Uh...jeans.
牛仔裤料
Oh, and they feel so tight, huh?
它们摸起来还特别紧
Oh, a little holiday trick.
节日专用窍门
Keeps me from eating too much.
能让我少吃点
I think you're too tense.
你太紧张了
What the hell is going --
到底发生了什么...
- Hey, hon. - Yeah?
-亲爱的 -什么事
We didn't get much of a chance to talk today.
我们今天还没有什么机会聊天
How are you?
你好吗
Not great.
不怎么好
But, honestly, I don't want to bore you.
实话说 我不想烦你
Oh, well, at least start the story.
那你至少说给我听听
Okay. Um, well, I got back from Portland,
好吧 我从波特兰回来时
and Phil was in the bathtub with all the ducks,
菲尔和鸭子们一同泡在浴缸里
and I just completely lost it.
我完全爆发了
And, yes, I've apologized...
是的 我道过歉了
but he's really not letting go of it this time.
可他这次完全不肯原谅我
I -- you're so strong!
你真有力气
Work's taking up a lot of your time, isn't it?
工作占去了你大部分时间 对吧
You're taking his side on this?
你这次站在他那边吗
I've been you on this.
我跟你是一样的
When I was bogged down with work,
我在工作上遇到麻烦的时候
your mother and I fought all the time.
经常跟你妈吵架
I mean, maybe not about ducks. I'm not a weirdo.
也许不是因为鸭子 我没那么奇怪
But maybe he's mad at you because you're not around.
但也许他生气是因为你不在身边
But I only took like two trips.
可我只出了两次差
Just 'cause you're around doesn't mean you're around.
也许你人在心不在
That's one of those loopy things mom would say.
老妈就喜欢说这种绕来绕去的话
I used to pretend that I didn't understand it, too,
我以前也假装听不懂
but I did.
但我其实懂的
Why not just make some time for each other?
为什么不多花点时间陪陪彼此
Maybe you're right.
也许你说得对
Maybe I'll take him for a weekend up north, huh?
也许我应该找个周末带他到外面玩玩
- What do you think? - Sure.
-你怎么看 -挺好的
Yeah. Or leave him.
或者抛弃他
You're still attractive. Worked great for me.
你还是挺有魅力的 我觉得挺好
I am still in shock about
我还在感叹
the deal we got on those ice-cube trays.
那些冰块模子怎么能这么便宜
I know. It's like we pulled off the great tray robbery.
对啊 感觉像是不要钱随便拿
You know, it says we're supposed to
上面说我们可以直接
throw them in the dishwasher,
丢进洗碗机
but I'm just gonna give them a rinse.
但我还是打算手洗
Oh, you are so bad!
你真是太坏了
You know, since we got all of our errands done early
既然我们该做的都做完了
and we do have a little extra time on our hands...
现在两个人都有时间
and Lily's at a sleepover.
莉莉又去朋友家睡了
Just -- right there. A little to the right.
就是那里 往右边一点
Right -- yeah. Perfect. Now turn.
好了 非常棒 放手
I have been wanting to flip that mattress for months.
我想给床垫翻个儿想好久了
I know. It feels good to get stuff done.
就是啊 把事情做完的感觉真好
- Yeah, it does! - Yes!
-是啊 -真好
So, other than Lily,
除了莉莉
we have no real reason to be alive, right?
我们也没有什么活着的理由了吧
Oh, God, is that my dad?
天哪 是我爸吗
Get in the laundry room!
去洗衣间
And sad news from the zoo,
动物园传来坏消息
Chuffa the panda has suffered a m--
熊猫春发患上了...
动物园悲剧
Stop touching stuff!
别乱碰
Are you sure we should be doing this?
你确定我们能这么做吗
Mitchell, we just high-fived over flipping a mattress.
米奇尔 我们刚刚为了翻床垫而击掌庆祝
That's way sadder than Phil and Claire's gutter covers.
那比菲尔和克莱尔为水槽盖激动可悲多了
Plus, Cyril won't care.
再说了 西里尔不会在意的
It's not like he hasn't had his fun in our place.
他在我们家玩得不是挺开心的吗
- What? When? - At your birthday party.
-啥 什么时候 -在你生日派对上
He and Gregory were in the bathroom for like an hour.
他和格雷戈里在浴室里待了一个小时
Oh, no. That's 'cause Gregory lost a contact lens.
别想歪 那是因为格雷戈里的隐形眼镜掉了
Okay, you're adorable.
好吧 你呆得太可爱了
All right, now, I'm gonna go make some cocktails,
好了 我现在要去调点鸡尾酒
and then when that sun goes down...
然后等到太阳下山
you and I can get cozy in the hot tub, okay?
我们就到热水浴缸里放松放松 怎么样
Ohh, I like the sound of that.
好像很赞
I'm gonna put on some mood music, huh?
我放点有情调的音乐 好吗
Hey, Cam, don't they have a remote
小卡 他们这儿没有能控制整间房的
- that controls everything? - Yeah, I think so.
-遥控器吗 -有的吧
You know where he keeps that?
你知道他放在哪儿吗
Well, ours is always getting buried in the couch.
反正我们俩的经常陷在沙发缝里
Oh, here it is.
找到了
Ooh, I like this song.
我爱这首歌
Would you like a show to go with it?
你想看我伴舞一曲吗
- Mitchell! - Who's Mitchell?
-米奇尔 -那是谁
I'm Magic Mitch.
我是魔力米奇
Welder by day...
白天我是焊接工人
stripper by choice.
业余时间我是脱衣舞男
My unwed sister is seven months pregnant.
我未婚的姐姐怀着七个月的身子
My mother has some uterine issues
我母亲得了妇科病
not covered by medicare.
医保却不给报销
But if you want to make it rain, I will --
如果你愿意慷慨解囊 我会献上...
Mitchell! Sweetie, are you okay?
米奇尔 亲爱的 你没事吧
Yeah, I'm fine.
我没事
How's the lamp? Is it okay? Does it work?
灯呢 没坏吧 还能亮吗
- It's fine. See? - Okay.
-好着呢 你看 -那就好
All right, now, come on. Let's get back on track.
好了 来吧 做正经事要紧
- Yes. - I'll go get the cocktails.
-是的 -我这就去调酒
You make yourself comfortable.
你请随意
I sure will.
必须的
Maybe something a little more lively?
换首欢快点的歌
同志浪漫喜剧电影
It's not "Adam and Steve", damn it.
这又不是《亚当和史蒂夫》 该死的
Corpses as far as the eye can see.
极目所见 尸体遍野
What you don't know about your ice-cube tray
你若不了解你家的冰块模子
could kill you.
也许会害死你
Maybe the first station.
也许是第一个
Oh, what's happening?
什么情况
Geez.
我的天
Don't worry about Claire.
别担心克莱尔会怎么样了
You've got me all afternoon.
我整个下午[的时间]都是你的
Honey, remember those gutter covers
亲爱的 你还记得一年前
that we ordered like a year ago?
我们订的那批水槽盖吗
Good news. They shipped!
好消息 他们终于发货了
That's exciting.
真棒
Claire's been working a lot lately,
克莱尔最近工作都很忙
and it's been...great.
这样真是挺棒的
It's given me a lot more time for "Battle Beasts of Gar",
这样我多出很多时间打《格尔斗兽》
this massive online role-playing game.
一款大型的角色扮演网游
And with Cyril's state-of-the-art gaming system,
而且自从用了西里尔的顶尖游戏系统
I've been able to take my half-dwarf, half-ox fire mage --
我就能把我那半矮人半公牛的火法师
PyroMiniYak --
喷火小牦牛[脑残]
to a whole new level.
刷到更高的级别
Level three!
第三级
Our guild, thugsquad,
我们那个阵营 暴徒战队
has been trying to plan a raid against our arch-rival guild,
一直在策划突袭我们的死敌阵营
led by the ruthless SexyBeast,
他们的头儿是残忍的性感小兽
and I got a text saying it was finally happening.
然后我收到通知 我们终于要发动突袭
That is, if I could get Claire
但前提是我必须得搞定克莱尔
to be okay with me disappearing for a few hours.
让她容我消失几个小时
Phil, honey, I want to apologize.
菲尔 亲爱的 我想跟你道个歉
For what? You haven't -
为啥要道歉 你又没有
been around at all. I know.
露过面 没错
I know, and I want to make it up to you.
的确如此 所以我想补偿你
It was very hurtful.
我挺伤心的
Yeah. It's just sometimes I get so caught up in work
肯定的 只是我有时候真的工作太忙了
that even when I am around, I'm not around.
所以就算我出现在这里 也是心不在焉
So well put.
说得真好
I don't want to beat you up about that.
完全无法反驳
It's healing time now.
其实我的心情有好转
You know, what I'd love
我想下午去西里尔家
is a few hours at cyril's house this afternoon.
待个几小时
With me?
要我陪你一起去吗
Actually...
其实吧
I was thinking about that
我是想去玩
role-playing thing I'm into?
我喜欢的那个角色扮演游戏
Phil and I have, on occasion,
我和菲尔时不时会
adopted various alter-egos to spice up our marriage.
玩几次角色扮演来为我们的婚姻增添情调
Cyril's house does sound
西里尔家听上去确实
kind of perfect for some romance.
适合做点浪漫的事
And I like that Phil wants to move past this, so...
而且菲尔愿意翻篇我也挺高兴的 那就...
Did you have a particular genre in mind
你有给今天下午的游戏
for this afternoon's game?
想好什么主题风格吗
Yes. Medieval fantasy.
有 中世纪幻想
Great.
很好
Thank you.
非常感谢
Oh, SexyBeast, you are gonna get so spanked.
性感小兽 等着被打屁屁吧
Refrigerator.
冰箱
No, say "Fridger-frater."
不对 应该是"箱冰"
But it's refrigerator.
但那就是冰箱
I need you to focus, kid.
集中点注意力 小屁孩
Fridger-frater -- where we keep the sammiches.
那是"箱冰" 我们放"三门治"的地方
People seem delighted by Joe. Whatever.
大家好像都很喜欢乔 随便了
But I had that fetching study partner coming over,
但是我那位很漂亮的自习搭档要来我家
and I realized I could use Joe's by-the-numbers cuteness
然后我发现可以利用乔的呆萌
to my amorous advantage.
来助我施展多情的魅力
Even for me, that was a lot of Manny.
就连我都觉得这话太"曼尼特色"了
But it's sandwich.
但是那叫三明治
It's like you're not even trying.
你到底有没有在听
Okay, that's probably her.
好了 应该是她到了
L-look, just be cute, okay? For my sake.
你就表现得可爱一点好吗 给我点面子
It's like when guys use puppies to attract girls.
就和男生用小狗狗吸引女生一样
- Hi, Manny. - Uh, Olive. Please come in.
-你好 曼尼 -奥莉薇 请进
That's my little brother, Joe.
那是我弟弟 乔
Don't mind his little pot there.
别介意他的那些小锅小碗
Hey, what do you have in there again?
你的锅里有啥来着
Some kind of pasta dish?
有意大利面吗
Are you a doggie?
你是小狗狗吗
Yeah, he's always doing adorable stuff like that
是的 他经常做这些萌萌的动作
'cause I'm his hero.
因为他很崇拜我
I love that.
真有爱
Are you a good doggie or a bad doggie?
你是好狗狗还是坏狗狗呢
Oh, scary!
好可怕噢
- Adorable. - I know.
-好可爱 -对啊
Uh, so should we head up?
那个 我们开始学习吧
Oh, my god! Get it off me!
我的天 把他拉开
Uh...no! Joe! Joe!
不 乔 快下来乔
Joe, let go!
乔 松手
- What are you doing? - He's biting me! Do something!
-你在干嘛 -他在咬我 快帮帮我
No! Bad Joe!
不能这样 坏蛋乔
- Bad Joe! - That's just making him bite me harder!
-小坏蛋 -你这样他咬得更凶
A person is not a sammich, Joe!
别把人当成"三门治" 乔
Joe, what are you doing?
乔 你在干嘛
Joe, let go!
乔 放手
Did you know Phil was gonna be here?
你知道菲尔会来这儿吗
No. I-I wear a T-shirt in the pool.
不知道 我在泳池都要穿T恤
Do you think I want him to see me in the middle of this?
你觉得我会想让他看到我们现在这样吗
Go. Go.
走 走
Well, we only have one six-pack.
我们只有一箱六罐装的啤酒
So, in a way, it's good all the girls said no.
所以其实那些女孩不来是好事
What are you doing here?
你在这里干嘛
Oh, um, my S.A.T. prep group
那个 我的高考备考小组
needed a quiet place to study.
需要找个安静的地方学习
You ain't studying acting.
你们学的又不是表演
Okay. We don't have time for this.
行了 我们没空
- Your father -- - Everybody freeze!
-你爸 -- -所有人都不许动
Taekwondo!
跆拳道
Eyes on those blood bats! Let's burn 'em down fast!
盯紧那些血蝙蝠 速度烧光它们
Come on, Madskillz87!
疯技87 拜托给点力
You're supposed to be on spell interrupt!
你要干扰他们施放魔咒
Do not let those casters get off any more frost traps!
别再让那些术士躲过寒霜陷阱了
Lisa, looks like it's you and me on the lava demon.
丽萨 看来岩浆恶魔这能靠你跟我对付了
Hang tight!
挺住
Powder!
药粉
Let's send them back to hell in time for Madskillz
为了疯技 迅速把他们遣回地狱去
to make it to his oboe lesson!
别误了他的双簧管课
- And I thought my dad was embarrassing. - Shut up.
-我之前还觉得我爸让我丢脸了 -闭嘴
Okay, let's go. Let's go.
好了 我们走
Hello?
有人吗
Is anybody here?
有人在吗
Drop it!
放下[武器]
Ohh, gettin' right to it.
直奔主题啊
I like it.
我喜欢
Please, sir, have pity.
求你了 先生 发发慈悲[模仿英国口音]
It's true I'm just a common thief,
我真的只是个普通的小贼
but if you have mercy,
但如果你肯大发慈悲
- I'll make it worth your while -- - Oh, yes.
-我会好好补偿你的 -是的
What medieval creature is this?
这个中世纪的生物是什么
Half-man, half-robot... welder?
半人类半机器的电焊工吗
If you come out now, you simpering coward,
如果你现在出来 你这个满脸假笑的懦夫
maybe I'll show you a little mercy.
也许我会对你发点慈悲的
Please don't hurt me! It was her idea!
请别伤害我 都是她的主意
I'm the one who wanted to go slow!
我本不想进展这么快的
- Reuben? - Oh, Alex!
-罗本 -艾丽克斯
- Claire? - Reuben again?
-克莱尔 -怎么又是罗本
He wore a batman cape to the first day of high school!
高中开学第一天他披着蝙蝠侠披风
You're really judging me right now
你真的想现在指责我的选择吗
when you look like a hooker at comic-con?
你穿得就像漫画大会上的妓女
Yes, this was a miscalculation on my part,
是的 我在理解上出了些问题
- and I will be getting my coat... - Claire,
-我这就去拿我的外套 -克莱尔
- what is going on? - ...and getting out of here as soon as I -
-怎么回事 -尽快离开这里 我...
Luke?
卢克
Is that beer behind your back?
你后面藏的是啤酒吗
Get out here! You are so grounded!
快出来 你被禁足了
Mrs. Dunphy, do you ever tutor?
邓菲夫人 你当家教吗
Dude!
老兄
I'm just gonna grab my razor scooter and bounce.
我把我的滑板车一拿就赶紧撤了
- Happy birth-- - Happy birth--
-生日快... -生日快...
No, you know it's no one's birthday.
得了 你们知道今天谁也不过生日
You're probably here for the same reason as those two.
你们来这的原因估计跟那二位一样
Well, technically, this is your fault,
严格来讲 这是你们的错
because we were afraid our marriage
因为我们担心我们的婚姻
was getting as boring as yours.
会像你们的一样越来越沉闷
Though based on her outfit,
不过从她的着装来看
we need to work a little harder.
我们得再努把力了
You should all be ashamed of yourselves.
你们都应该为自己的行为感到惭愧
I'm the only one authorized to be here.
我才是唯一一个有权到这来的人
By sneaking in, you've disrespected me,
你们偷偷潜入 既不尊重我
and violated the trust between me, my clients,
也破坏了客户对我的信任
and this sexy, sexy house.
更亵渎了这所风情万种的房子
No. No!
不 不
Great. Now Lisa's dead.
好极了 丽萨死了
I want everybody out of here right now!
我要你们马上离开这里
Well, at least we have our house to ourselves still.
至少我们还有自己的房子
Does magic Mitch have another set him in?
魔力米奇还有别的招式吗
Yeah. His grandma's built-up shoe isn't gonna pay for itself.
当然 没两下子怎么买他奶奶的术后特制鞋
Okay, we need to work on your sexy patter.
好吧 你的风骚姿势还得练练
Off the lamp. Off the lamp.
快下来吧
Okay, before you get any stupid ideas,
好吧 以免你产生什么愚蠢的想法
Reuben and I broke in here
我告诉你 罗本和我到这来
so I could help him with his math.
是为了帮他补习数学
Good luck getting through to that guy.
给那家伙补习可真是辛苦你了
He's clueless.
他笨得要死
- Honey. - Yes?
-亲爱的 -什么事
I'm sorry. That -- that little outburst
对不起 刚才我情绪那么激动
was mainly directed at them.
主要是针对他们的
Whatever misunderstanding led to this,
不管是什么误会让你这样
I'm... happy about.
我都很开心
I thought you were upset
我以为你不开心
because we hadn't spent any time together.
是因为我们最近很少有时间在一起
And then you said you wanted some role-playing fun...
而你又说想要玩角色扮演...
Really?
真的吗
Honey, I know you've been working really hard lately,
亲爱的 我知道你最近工作很辛苦
and I-I appreciate any time I can get with you.
我很珍惜我们在一起的时光
- So you're not mad at me? - Silence, Elvin harlot.
-所以你没生我的气吗 -安静 埃尔文的妓女
Ohh, sorry, my lord.
对不起 大人
Didn't mean to offend.
小女子无意冒犯
But you have, craven wench.
但我生气了 懦弱的姑娘
And I shall mete out punishment as --
而我将要惩罚你...
I can hear you guys giggling.
我能听见你们在偷笑
At least I have a girlfriend!
起码我还有女朋友
All clear.
都走了
Well, that was crazy.
刚才真是惊悚
My ticker hasn't gotten a workout that good
自从叠杯决赛后
since I made the finals of that cup-stacking competition.
我的心脏就再没经受过这么大的考验
Hey, should I take these robes upstairs?
我是不是该把浴袍拿到楼上去
I'm gonna pop mine in the washer.
我把我的这件拿回去洗吧
I've got about three pounds of tension sweat in here.
上面大概能有三磅的冷汗了
I, uh...
我...
I feel kind of bad about before.
之前的事我觉得有些抱歉
Don't. We didn't do anything.
不必 我们也没做什么
I know. It just felt like something could've...
我知道 只是我觉得如果...
- If everybody hadn't... - Yeah.
-如果他们没... -是啊
You know what it is.
你知道是什么原因吗
- It's the house. - It's the house!
-都怪这房子 -都怪这房子
I mean, the fireplace, the music...
那壁炉 还有音乐...
The crazy couch-bed.
抽风的沙发床
Anyone could've gotten swept up.
任何人都会性奋起来的
- Anyone. - Anyone. Yeah.
-任何人 -任何人 是啊
Well, I should get going.
我该走了
Yeah. Totally.
是啊 没错
I mean, it was a fun afternoon, though.
不管怎么样 这个下午过得很愉快
I wanted one crazy adventure before I got married,
结婚前我一直想来一次疯狂的冒险
and I got one.
而我得到了
Good. It was fun.
那就好 的确很愉快
I'll see you later.
回见
Yep.
好的
What's Joe doing in Stella's cage?
乔在斯黛拉的笼子里干什么
He knows what he did.
他清楚自己做了什么坏事
Go on, boy! Get!
出来 孩子 出来
Jay!
So, I was thinking,
我在想
since Miami's only a few hours away from Colombia,
既然迈阿密离哥伦比亚只有几小时的路程
why don't we have my relatives fly to Miami
为什么不让我的亲戚飞到迈阿密去
so that the whole family can be together?
这样所有人就都能在一起了
Gloria, I love your family. I do.
歌洛莉亚 我爱你的家人 真的
- But -- - This is so typical.
-可是 -你总是这样
We do everything for your family,
为你的家人我们可以做任何事
but when it comes to my side of the family, then --
但轮到我的家人时 你就...
- We're not going to Miami. - What?
-我们不去迈阿密了 -什么
I bought everybody plane tickets to Colombia.
我为所有人买了去哥伦比亚的机票
Ay, Jay!
That's not what you were supposed to do!
你不应该这样做的
I think you mean "You shouldn't have,"
我想你的意思是"你不必这样做的"
and you're probably right.
也许你是对的
No! I mean you shouldn't have been nice about this at all!
不 我的意思是你不该这么善解人意的
You were supposed to say,
你应该说
"Why can't we see your family some other time?"
"为什么不能换个时间见你的家人呢"
and I would say, "Like when?"
而我会说 "什么时候"
and then you would say, "Is never an option?"
而你会说 "有什么好选的"
and I would say, "That's so mean, Jay Pritchett!"
而我会说 "怎么能这样说话 杰·普里契特"
and then you would say,
然后你会说
"Is there a way that I can make it up to you, Gloria?"
"就没什么能补偿你的方法吗 歌洛莉亚"
and then I would say, "How about if..."
然后我会说 "不如..."
If what?
不如什么
Oh, no.
不是吧
Hola! Hola! Hola!
你们好啊
Yeah. Come in, come in.
好啊 快进来
Does this feel like a short visit to you or a long one?
你觉得会是短暂小住还是长期驻扎
The pregnant one brought a stroller.
怀孕的那个把婴儿车都带上了 你觉得呢