摩登家庭 第八季 Modern Family Season 8 第6集: Grab It!

上映日期: 2,016

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧 / 家庭

导演: 克里斯·科赫

演员: 艾德·奥尼尔 / 索菲娅·维加拉 / 朱丽·鲍温 / 泰·布利尔 / 杰西·泰勒·弗格森 / 艾瑞克·斯通斯崔特 / 里克·罗德里格兹 / 诺兰·古德 / 萨拉·海蓝德 / 阿芮尔·温特 / 奥布里·


台词
Hey, baby brother!
好啊 宝贝弟弟
Let's not insult us both. How much do you need?
我们别侮辱彼此了 你要多少钱
Mom paid my car insurance this month,
妈妈帮我先付了这个月的汽车保险
and I told her I'd have it today --
我跟她说我今天会有钱...
- The number, the number. - $120.
-告诉我数字就好 -120元
Grandpa got me a job at his country club,
外公帮我在他的乡村俱乐部找了份工作
and I've been cleaning up in tips.
我赚小费赚翻了
I also like the way those guys talk.
我还喜欢这些人的霸气说话方式
There's actually an ethnic slur for Norwegians.
原来有专门对挪威人的种族蔑称呢
It's ice ers.
叫冰[哔]
Hey, buddy, they canceled my showing,
儿子 他们取消来看房
so I can drive you to work.
我可以开车载你去上班了
b 316 121 316 121 316 121 b 316 121 320 121 323 121 b 323 121 323 123 323 123 b b 311 122 317 114 317 114 b 317 114 317 114 317 114 b b b 317 105 316 107 314 112 b 313 112
m 71 60 b 71 0 161 0 161 60 b 161 120 71 120 71 60
m 20 0 l 209 0 b b b 11 228 0 218 0 209 l 0 20 b 0 11 11 0 20 0
That looks good. What is it?
看起来不错啊 是什么
原创翻译 双语字幕
仅供学习 禁止用于任何商业盈利行为更多影视更新请登陆www.ZiMuZu.tv
Lobster Thermidor from the country club.
乡村俱乐部的热月龙虾
There's also cherries jubilee in the fridge.
冰箱里还有"樱桃盛宴"甜点
翻译: 冰蓝 吃货丁小七 小泡椒
Look at us eating like rich people in the '50s.
瞧瞧我们 像50年代的富人在吃东西
翻译: 洗七里 MsFool
Hey, Mom! Have a good day at work.
好啊 妈妈 祝你今天工作顺利
Uh, I already did that. It's 3:30.
我已经上完班了 都三点半了
校对: 猛男俱乐部赛太公
How are you just waking up?
你怎么能现在才刚醒
I set my alarm for noon. I must have slept through it.
我把闹钟定在了中午 我肯定是睡过去了
时间轴: 三水
I was working late promoting a new club.
我工作得很晚 为一家新的酒吧宣传
Oh, by the way, here is the insurance money.
对了 这是汽车保险的钱
后期: 瓜瓜 总监: 怀念浓子的瓜瓜
- Thank you. - A lot of singles in there.
-谢谢 -里面有很多一元纸币啊
What exactly do you do at this club?
你到底在这个酒吧做什么"工作"
Oh, right.
对对对
'Cause I'm a stripper, Alex.
因为我是脱衣舞女 艾丽克斯
Oh, my God, do you really think I'm a stripper?
天啊 你们真觉得我是个脱衣舞女吗
- No. - No.
-不觉得 -不觉得
Okay, well, I'm off.
好了 我走了
I'm signing up for some business classes
我要去社区大学
at community college.
报名参加一些商务课
Business class, huh?
商务课啊
Sounds like somebody's been influenced
看来有人受到了影响啊
by living under the same roof
因为她和一个行业巨头
with a certain captain of industry.
住在同一个屋檐下
Thank you, honey, but none of my success
谢谢你 亲爱的 但要不是
would have been possible without your support as a homemaker.
有你照顾家并支持我 我也不可能成功
Sweetheart, while I'm very flattered
亲爱的 你突然对商业感兴趣了
by your sudden interest in business,
我真是觉得很荣幸
how about instead of another class, you get a job?
但你还是别再上课了 而是找份工作吧
Get your hands a little dirty, huh?
把手弄脏[亲自干活]吧
She could run her hands through her hair.
她可以用手抓抓头发
- That would do it. - I've already pre-registered.
-那就脏了 -我已经预注册了
Also, I signed us up for that book signing tonight.
我还报名了今晚的签售会
You still in?
你还来吗
Absolutely.
绝对的
Got my book right here.
我的书就在这
- Trying to make it look like you read it? - Amateur.
-想把这本书弄成你看过的样子吗 -外行
家 庭
摩 登
第八季 第六集
So, I don't really have a job title
我的工作没有职称
or even a set place to work,
也没有固定的工作地点
so I kind of just float around
所以我就转来转去
and make sure everyone has what they need.
确保所有人得到了需要的东西
4:00, Your Honor.
四点了 法官大人
Don't forget to take your medicine.
别忘了吃药
Well, all these powerful guys.
这都是有权有势的人
You can make connections here that'll last forever.
你可以在这里积累永恒的人脉
Not really.
也不行
We have a lot of turnover here.
这里经常有人去世
That flag outside has been at half-mast since April.
从四月以来 外面就一直在降半旗
That's why we have these.
所以才有这个
今晚 准会员鸡尾酒派对
Oh. How's that work?
这是怎么回事
You find a member to sponsor you,
你找个会员为你担保
come have some drinks with the committee,
过来跟委员会喝点酒
and they vote a few people in.
他们会投票选出一些新会员
Similar process to a secret cheer society I was in.
跟我曾加入的秘密拉拉队组织程序差不多
Skull and Pom-Poms.
骷髅头和拉拉队绒球
I've said too much already.
我已经泄露太多了
Are you thinking of joining?
你想加入吗
Both my partners are in clubs.
我的两个合作伙伴都在俱乐部里
They've drummed up a lot of business.
他们招徕了许多生意
Maybe I --
也许我...
Hey, there's Jay. Maybe he can --
那是杰 也许他可以
Jay. Jay!
杰 杰
Jay, Jay, Jay!
杰杰杰
Go, go, go!
快走
Jay, wait up!
杰 等等
I think someone's calling for you.
我觉得有人在叫你
I didn't hear anything. What's wrong with this cart?
我什么都没听见 这车怎么了
- You got the brakes on? Go! - Ow! Your spikes.
-你踩了刹车吗 快啊 -你的钉鞋
Hey, hey, hey! Cramps.
跑太快有点抽筋了
Luke and I just split a Beef Wellington
卢克和我刚一起吃了一块威灵顿牛排
and clams casino.
和卡西诺烧蛤
Um, I'm wondering if you'd, uh, sponsor me
我想知道你能否为我担保
for the new-members thing tonight.
让我参加今晚的新会员派对
Gee, I'd like to, but they got rules
天啊 我很乐意 但他们有规定
about relatives sponsoring new members, so --
亲戚不能为新会员担保 所以
No, they don't. I just did it.
他们没有 我就这样做了
Gee, they must have changed that.
天啊 他们肯定是改规定了
Oh, great, I'll see you tonight. What time should I be here?
真棒 今晚见 我该几点来
Oh, I think it starts about 9:30.
我想大概九点半开始吧
No, it'll be over by then. It starts at 7:00.
不 那时候就结束了 七点开始
They must have changed that, too.
他们肯定也改时间了
Thanks, Jay. See you at 7:00.
谢谢你 杰 七点见
Wait, that was Claire's husband, right?
等等 那是克莱尔的丈夫对吧
Yes, it was, Anders, you stupid ice
是的 安德斯 你个傻逼冰[哔]
I haven't had one night to myself in six months,
六个月来 我从来没机会独处一晚
but tonight, Manny's going to a party.
但今晚 曼尼要去参加派对
And if I can get Joe tired enough to go to sleep,
如果我能让乔累到睡觉
I can finally relax and take a long, nice bath.
我就终于可以放松 洗个长长的舒服澡了
I even have a wine glass that floats.
我还有一个能浮起来的酒杯
In case I fall asleep, nothing bad can happen.
就算我睡着了 也不会发生糟糕的事
Ohh. Okay, little reindeer,
好了 小驯鹿
we didn't get to the North Pole yet.
我们还没到北极呢
I'm tired of this game.
我不想玩这个游戏了
Well, we need to take this food to Santa Claus.
我们得把这食物送给圣诞老人
If not, he's gonna starve to death.
如果不送 他就会饿死
Which shirt for the party --
我该穿哪件参加派对
the canary or the daffodil?
淡黄色还是黄水仙色
We're not doing this again.
别又来了
I just did the herringbone or the tweed for your vest.
我刚帮你决定了背心是选人字呢还是粗花呢
Just pick one and go.
随便选一件然后去吧
Okay. Oh, well, this needs ironing.
好吧 这件需要熨烫
Okay, jump on.
好吧 上车
Rudolph, to the laundry room!
驯鹿鲁道夫 去洗衣房
I know it's just community theater,
我知道这只是社区剧场
but aren't opening nights so exciting?
但是首映夜真是令人激动啊
Yes, the cream of society
是啊 社会精英
- decked out in their finest flip-flops. - Mitchell.
-穿上最好看的人字拖 -米奇尔
Oh, my God, I can't believe it.
天啊 我真不敢相信
I haven't seen you since high school!
高中后我就没见过你了
Uh, yes, it's been years, huh, uh, T-T-Tammy.
是的 好多年了对吧 泰咪
Hey, let me know
如果你想
if you want to roll around under the bleachers again, doll.
再跟我去看台下面"滚"几圈 告诉我一声
That's weird -- I feel like I would've remembered her.
好奇怪 感觉我应该能记住她这样的啊
- Why was she wearing a name tag? - I don't know.
-她为什么要贴着名牌啊 -我不知道
Oh, there he is!
是你啊
Remember that time in band
还记得我们玩乐队的时候
when you dropped your flute in the gutter?
你把笛子掉进水沟那次吗
I'm sorry -- I never played the flute or anything --
抱歉 我从来没吹过长笛之类的
Ha! Old gutter flute.
老水沟吹笛手
Okay, what is going on?
好吧 这到底怎么回事
Why is everyone talking to me?
为什么所有人都在跟我说话
- I think they're just being friendly. - Cam, oh, my God.
-我猜他们只是表达善意 -小卡 天啊
Is -- is this one of those interactive theater experiences?
这是那种互动式剧院吗
Oh, do you mean where the audience participates
你是说那种观众参与其中的
and the line between performer and spectator
故意模糊表演者
is delightfully blurred?
和观众之间的界限的美好表演吗
Mitchell, we're at a high-school reunion!
米奇尔 这是一个高中同学会
Stop pretending, all right? You tricked me.
别装了 好吗 你已经骗到我了
- I did not. - You always trick me.
-我没有 -你老是骗我
Every time we leave the house,
我们每次出门
it's like a game of Three-card Monte.
都像是在跟诈欺师斗智斗勇
Interactive theater is fun.
互动式剧院很有意思
It's not fun. It's never fun.
没意思 一点意思都没有
It's the worst thing that can happen to human
这是人类在和平时期所能遇到的
during peace time.
最糟糕的事
Okay, you know what, Mitchell?
好吧 米奇尔
Please, I'm on the board,
拜托 我是管理层的人
and I couldn't not bring my husband
别人的亲密爱人都开心出席
while everyone else's significant other
我怎么能不把我丈夫
is happy to be here.
带来呢
It's interactive?
所以这是互动剧院吗
You son of a bitch.
你个贱逼
There's a quote for your poster.
那句可以上你们的宣传海报
- Front door open. - Ay, no!
-前门开了 -不是吧
Please. Who?! Who?!
拜托 是谁 是谁
Ay, what the hell are you doing here?
你到底还在这里干什么
I had the most humiliating experience of my entire life.
我刚经历了人生中最尴尬的事
I may never leave this house again.
我可能永远都不要走出这个家了
Okay, you're just tired.
好了 你只是累了
I'm gonna make you an espresso, and you go back.
我给你倒杯咖啡 你就可以再战了
No, I can't go back there.
不 我不能再去了
Did you get in trouble again for adjusting the lighting?
你又因为调节灯光惹麻烦了吗
You're still young.
你还年轻
You can take a bright bulb.
光线亮一点没关系
I was flirting with Ava Morris,
我本来在逗艾娃·莫里斯开心
and I walked into a coffee table
结果小腿胫骨狠狠地撞上了
and hit my shin really hard
一张咖啡桌
and started crying in front of everyone.
然后在所有人面前哭出来了
Bad enough -- but then I noticed
已经够惨了吧 然后我发现
I spilled my drink on my crotch area,
我不小心洒了点饮料在裤裆处
creating a very incriminating stain.
那画面被人看见我就玩完了
I ran to the bathroom and started drying it with a towel,
所以我冲去洗手间想拿毛巾擦干
but the door swung open,
结果门开了
and I was viewed by my classmates
然后全班同学都看到了
vigorously attending to my groin.
我猛擦自己"腹部下方"的样子
Oh, and did I mention the picture of Ava's grandmother
我刚有提到艾娃祖母穿着比基尼滑水的照片
water skiing in a bikini that was directly in my eyeline?
当时刚好挂在我眼前的方位吗
That happens to everyone sometimes.
这种事谁都碰到过
You're gonna be fine once you drink --
只要你喝点咖啡就没...
Ay, no!
Hi, Mama! Hi, Mama! Hi, Mama!
妈妈 妈妈 妈妈
In the workplace, we women have been told
在工作场所 我们女性被要求
to suppress it, contain it, ignore it.
容忍 谦让 无视
Well, you know what I say?
你知道我怎么说吗
- Grab it! - Grab it.
-抓住机会 -抓住机会
Alex is not my most expressive child,
艾丽克斯不是我们家最擅长表达的孩子
but when she enrolled in a business class
但当她去上了一门商科课程
and then signed up for a lecture series
然后听了一系列名为
called "Meet the She-E-O,"
"直面女总裁"的讲座之后
it was pretty clear to me what she was trying to say --
我就很清楚地了解她的意思了
"I admire you, Mom."
"我崇拜你 妈妈"
- So, what do you think? - Quiet.
-所以你怎么看 -安静
- I think -- - Stop talking.
-我觉得... -别说话
I mean, sure, it was tough --
我知道 这很不容易
raising three kids and running a business.
养大三个孩子 还要兼顾事业
But when the chance to be She-E-O arose,
不过当我有机会成为女总裁时
I had only one thought.
我只有一个想法
Grab it. Grab it. Grab it. Grab it.
抓住机会 抓住机会 抓住机会
I get it. I grabbed it.
我懂了 我抓住机会了
I will move my seat.
你再这样我换座位了
A mother knows how to read between the lines.
一个母亲知道怎样读出孩子的潜台词
Alex's mouth may have said, "You're embarrassing me."
艾丽克斯嘴里说着"你这样让我很尴尬"
But her heart was saying, "You're inspiring me."
但心里一定在说"你激励了我"
"Leave me alone."
"让我自己待着"
"Show me the way."
"请给我指引"
"Are you still talking?"
"你还没说完吗"
"Never stop rocking."
"请永远这么牛逼"
Okay, first question.
好吧 第一个问题
Ah, right up front.
前面这位
- Hi. - Hi.
-你好 -你好
Hi, I'm Alex.
你好 我是艾丽克斯
Long-time reader, first-time grabber.
长期粉丝 但第一次抓住机会
Anyway, I'm a biochemistry major and CalTech,
总之 我在加州理工读生化专业
but your book got me thinking about a business career.
但你的书让我对商科产生兴趣
And now I'm considering double-majoring,
所以我现在在考虑双专业
but is that taking on a little too much?
但这样是不是负担太重
Alex, look at me.
艾丽克斯 看着我
If you can think it, you can grab it.
你能想到 就能抓到
Aah! Oh, my God!
天哪
You're my hero, Nancy. Thank you.
你是我的英雄 南希 谢谢
Who's next?
下一位
- I've got a -- - just a quick comment.
-我有个... -我就简单说一句
Um, I also raised three children,
我也抚养了三个孩子
and I am the She-E-O of a large company.
同时是一间大公司的女总裁
And I got to say,
我得说
it's like looking a mirror, Nancy.
看到你就像看我自己 南希
That's great. What's the company?
真棒 是哪间公司
Pritchett's Closets and Blinds.
普利切特衣橱及窗帘公司
You sell closets and blinds?
你们卖橱柜和窗帘吗
I could understand shutters and blinds or closets and...
一般不是卖百叶窗和窗帘 或者橱柜和...
We're good, Nancy.
我们公司生意很好 南希
What I wanted to talk about was how on page 1 of your book,
我想说的是 在你书的第一页
you say you had hard time not bringing your work home.
你为什么会说很难不把工作带回家做呢
That was just a joke.
那只是个玩笑
As you remember, my business was started in my garage.
你应该记得 我的事业起始于我自己的车库
So, you know how it's not just family time that matters.
所以你知道重要的不只是跟家人一起的时间
It's quality family time.
而是高质量的家人共处时光
I agree.
我同意
That's why I home-school all three of my children.
这就是我对孩子实施在家教育的原因
The conference table in our boardroom
其实我们董事会的会议桌
actually rests on their play structure.
就在他们的游乐设施旁边
What am I saying? Stand up, kids?
我在说什么呢 站起来 孩子们
So, three daddies?
仨个不同爸爸 是吗
You sound insane!
你听上去像个疯子
All right.
好啦
Hey, Pritch, isn't that your gay son?
普里契特 那不是你的同性恋儿子么
Son-in-law.
女婿
You've got a gay son-in-law, too?
你的女婿也是同性恋吗
I'm not doing this dance with you guys again.
我不要再随你们起舞了
I don't know what I was worried about.
我不知道自己在担心什么
All I had to do was let Phil be Phil.
我只需要让菲尔做自己就行
He'd never get past the vote.
他不可能通过投票的
Fortunately, clueless boobs are one group
幸运的是 即使是最高法院
the Supreme Court can't force us to let in.
也无法强迫我们让蠢蛋入会
So, tell us about yourself, Phil.
跟我们说说你的事 菲尔
Well, uh, you and I have something in common, actually.
事实上 我们有一些共同点
We're both Congressmen.
我们都是议员
Go on, with that, Phil.
继续说 菲尔
You're in the state congress,
你在州议会
and I was in the Junior Tumbling Congress.
而我曾参加过低年级翻筋斗大赛[议会]
I was in Tumbling Congress.
我也参加过翻筋斗大赛
You trampoline?
你玩蹦床吗
I'm on my tramp like three nights a week!
我一周有三晚都在玩蹦床[骚货]
The rest of the time, I'm -- I'm with my wife.
剩余的几晚 我都在玩我的娇妻
So, I go back to the seller with an all-cash no-contingency offer
我带着全现款且无额外条件的报价找到那卖家
that'd pay off both his mortgages
我的报价不仅够他还清房贷
and leave enough after capital gains
而且他的资本收益
to put a down payment on a condo.
还足够付一间公寓的首付款
I give him an hour or I'm pulling the offer.
我给他一小时 否则我就撤回报价
I love this story. It's like a western.
我喜欢这故事 就像西部片一样
It was a nightmare.
真是场噩梦
Tumbling stories, bad jokes, and they ate it up!
翻筋斗往事 烂笑话 他们居然照单全收了
I'd say they were being polite,
要我说他们只是客套一下
but I've personally seen two of those guys
但我曾亲眼见过其中两个狠人
hit pedestrians and not even slow down!
开车撞倒了行人时 减速都不减速呢
No, true story! True story.
不 真人真事 真人真事
One second.
失陪一下
These guys are great.
这些人赞爆了
Listen.
听着
You need one more move to drive this home, and I'm thinking,
你还差一股劲把气氛炒到最热 而我在想
what does Phil bring to the party no else does?
菲尔如何把派对炒热到前无古人后无来者
Magic.
魔术
Are you sure? I'm a little rusty.
你确定吗 我有点生疏了
My money's on you.
我看好你
Go big, then go home.
大秀一场 然后滚蛋
- Sounded like you said -- - Hey, everybody!
-听上去像是你... -大家注意下
Phil's gonna do a little magic trick for you.
菲尔要给你们表演几个魔术
Okay, uh...
好吧
This one is for all of the lawyers in the room
这个魔术献给这里所有的律师
because you're so good at making our money...
因为你们可擅长将我们的钱...
disappear.
给变没了
Oh, hold on.
稍等
Congressman Morley, enough with the taxes.
莫里议员 别再提纳税了
You don't see us making you pay...
你也没见我们逼你
through the nose.
付大钱[从鼻孔]
Okay, hold on. Nobody move, I got this!
等等 大家别动 我能搞定
Who am I kidding? I can't fall asleep.
我骗谁呢 我睡不着觉的
Every car alarm, every whistle of the wind
每声汽车警报 以及那窸窣的风声
sounds like people laughing at me.
听上去都像有人在嘲笑我
It's all in your imagination.
这些都是你的臆想
I just want to Netflix and Mom.
我只想付费电视上看看《极品老妈》
Manny, you don't understand.
曼尼 你不明白
An hour ago, I had made the perfect tub!
一小时前 我放了一缸的完美的热水
Yeah, thanks again for that, but it didn't help.
再次向你表示感谢 但没啥帮助
Sugar! I love sugar!
糖果 我爱糖果
Okay, that is it!
好了 够了
You don't want to go to sleep!
你小子不想去睡觉
And you don't want to go to the party!
而你小子不想去参加派对
- Then I'm canceling the nighttime! - Mom?
-那我这就取消今晚的时光 -妈妈
You heard me. It's tomorrow.
你听见了 已经到明天了
We're going to school. Wait for me in the car.
我们这就去学校 到车上等我
Hey, Jay.
你好 杰
If you get this, please come --
如果你听到留言 求你快...
No one can help you now!
现在没人能帮你了
Yo, looks like everyone made it.
看上去大家都来了
But where's Vlad?
但弗拉德在哪
The exchange student from Latvia?
那个拉脱维亚的交换生吗
I haven't seen him.
我没见到他
I'd love to catch up with that dreamboat.
我真想再见见那个美男
So much has happened since high school.
高中毕业后发生太多的事了
Alcoholism.
酗酒
I tried to find happiness in the bottom of a bottle.
我试图从酒瓶底寻找幸福
A shattering depiction of human suffering.
对人生苦痛惊天地泣鬼神的描述
But enough about how I felt.
但还不足以描述我的感受
I just keep remembering how Vlad and I
我依旧记得我和弗拉德
had the best time in high school.
在高中共度的快乐时光
For some of us, that was the last best time.
对我们中某些人来说 却是最后的快乐时光
Vietnam.
越南战争
What time period was all this taking place?
这高中时代是发生在哪个年代啊
It didn't make any sense.
完全说不通
The way things ended with me and Vlad,
我和弗拉德分手的那些事
it still haunts me.
至今令我心有余悸
A lot of things haunt me.
很多事也都还令我心有余悸
It was the night of the prom.
那是毕业舞会的夜晚
Car accident.
出车祸
The roads were very icy.
路面上结满了冰
- Car accident. - You don't know.
-出车祸嘛 -不知道别瞎说
Through the mist, I saw the truck's headlights.
透过迷雾 我看见了卡车的车头灯
When I came to, the doctor told me we'd been in a horrible
当我醒来 医生告诉我我经历了一场惨烈的
- car accident! - Car accident.
-车祸 -车祸
Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
大姐你有没有搞错
Mitchell, this is the theater. Have some respect.
米奇尔 这里是剧院 放尊重点
All you have to do is sit there and be quiet.
你只需要乖乖坐着别出声
Tammy, you are never gonna believe who's here.
泰咪 你绝不会相信谁来了
- Who? - Vlad.
-是谁 -弗拉德
Oh, my God, where?
天啊 他在哪里
Out there.
就在那
There he is. That's Vlad.
就是他 他就是弗拉德
I swear I didn't know they were gonna pick you.
我发誓我不知道他们为啥选你
They probably assumed you were fun
他们可能觉得你会比较逗
because you were with me. They didn't know.
因为你是和我一起的 他们太傻太天真
Vlad, come up here.
弗拉德 快上台来
Move your country ass. I'm -- I'm leaving.
挪开你的乡下大屁股 我要走人了
No, no.
不 不
Just go up there, hug Tammy,
你就上台去拥抱一下泰咪
and wait for the surprise ending.
然后等着惊喜结局就好
I don't care about the surprise ending!
我才不在乎什么惊喜结局
You go be Vlad.
你上去演弗拉德去
I can't be Vlad because I am the surprise ending.
我不能演弗拉德 因为我就是那个惊喜结局
- What? - And it's a show-stopper.
-什么 -那将是令观众掌声不断的表演
I've been rehearsing for weeks.
我已经排练好几周了
Now, just stop being selfish and get up there.
你别这么自私了 快上台去吧
Just do it!
你就上去吧
We all want to get out of here!
我们都想快点完事走人
Vlad.
弗拉德
I didn't know how, I didn't know when,
我也不知道是何时 用什么招
but I was gonna get him.
但我知道此仇不报非君子
Vladdie, sweetie, you're here.
弗拉迪宝贝 亲爱的 你来了
Oh, you're really here.
你真的来了
Not okay.
自重
Oh, what a happy ending.
多圆满的结局啊
I'll say.
我也"圆满"了
Okay, okay.
行了行了
That-That is your gum.
你的口香糖都跑我嘴里来了
What a great reunion.
多棒的同学会啊
Yeah, everybody made it.
是啊 所有人都来了
Almost everybody.
几乎所有人
Hello, students!
同学们好
Janitor Joe!
校工老乔
Or should I say farewell?
或者我该说同学们永别了
All of a sudden, I knew how.
突然间我有了复仇的灵感
Hello again, students.
同学们 又见面了
Or should I say farewell?
或者我该说 永别了
And I knew when.
此时不报 更待何时
Wait, wait, does-does anybody else see his ghost right now?
等等 大家都看到他的鬼魂了吗
What?
什么
Yeah, who could forget
是啊 有谁能忘记
how he courageously showed up to our 25th
他鼓起勇气来参加我们25周年的同学会
and then-and then died in front of all of us.
然后死在我们所有人面前的情景
No, I'm about to die right now.
不 我现在刚要死
Mm-hmm, in fact, I-I remember his death
其实我还记得 他临死时
went a little something like-like this.
大概是这样的
I've lived a long life.
我度过了漫长的一生
Mitchell, what are you doing?
米奇尔 你在干什么
Many friends.
结交了那么多朋友
Oh, my beautiful Bess.
我美丽的妻子贝丝
Even took a trip to Washington, D.C.,
甚至还去了华盛顿特区
and had my picture made with the Congressman.
让我的照片跟议员大人合影
Never had any children, of course.
但当然我膝下无子
Which is why it was so important that I made it here tonight.
所以今晚来参加同学会对我如此重要
To see each of you.
来见见你们所有人
You are my children!
你们都是我的孩子
And I want to leave you with this one last thing.
我想最后再留给你们这样一句诗
- Do not go gentle -- - Do not go gentle into that good night.
-不要温和地 -不要温和地走进那个良夜
英国诗人狄兰·托马斯的代表作
Rage!
要怒斥
Rage
怒斥
against the dying of the light!
光明的消逝
And I don't feel good either.
我也感觉身体不太舒服
Yeah, good save.
救场救得"好"
Find anything on "Grab It" lady?
扒到那个"抓住机会"女士的丑事了吗
"Nancy Decker lawsuit" -- nope.
"南希·德克尔法律纠纷" 无结果
"Nancy Decker nose job" -- nope.
"南希·德克尔鼻子整形" 无结果
"Nancy Decker kills..." -- Oh!
"南希·德克尔杀..." 有了
"...at CEO comedy night."
"...在总裁喜剧之夜大杀四方"
Hello, we're here.
你们好 我们来了
Gloria?
歌洛莉亚
Haley, you remember that day
海莉 你还记得那天
when you said that if I ever needed a nanny,
你说无论什么时候我需要保姆
you would love to take care of Joe?
你都愿意帮我照看乔吗
- Well, here you go. - No, no.
-人给你 -不不
You can keep him for as long as you want.
想留几年随便你
Thank you.
谢了
Uh, no, uh, that doesn't really sound like me,
不 那话听起来不像我说的
plus I have a 9-to-5 job now, so bye.
再说我现在的工作是晚九朝五 再见
Please take me with you.
求你把我也带走吧
What's going on?
这是什么情况
Mama's crazy.
妈妈疯了
I am not crazy!
我才没疯
I just canceled the night.
我不过是取消了这个夜晚
Manny, maybe you could help out here.
曼尼 你给我解释一下吧
Mom's upset because Joe won't go to sleep
老妈发飙是因为乔不肯去睡觉
and I won't go back to a party.
我又不肯回到某个派对上
You won't go back to a party? Why?
你不肯回到派对上 为什么
I suffered an unfortunate series of embarrassing incidents.
我不幸遭遇了一连串尴尬事件
I just want a wine bath and to go to sleep.
我只想喝点小酒泡个澡去睡觉
Listen up, Manny.
听我说 曼尼
Of course you want to run away
在经历了那个派对上发生的事以后
from whatever happened back that party.
也难怪你想逃跑
Anybody would.
任何人都会想逃
But that just guarantees that it sticks with you forever.
但那样这些糗事就保证会跟着你到永远了
But if you march back in there
但如果你昂首阔步回到派对上
and you own it,
不以为耻反以为荣
you let those people know that you're better than them,
你让那些乌合之众明白你比他们强
and you will be a legend.
你就会是传奇人物了
- Okay. - Yeah.
-好 -没错
"Okay"?
"好"
You, get on the couch, go to sleep.
你 躺沙发上睡觉去
But I'm not tired.
可我不困啊
Don't care. Five, four, three...
我才不管 5 4 3
Okay, I'm going!
好吧 我去睡
- Two... - "Okay, I'm going"?
-2 -"好吧 我去睡"
I spend hours trying, and then you just come one --
我努力了好几个小时 而你上来就
The only thing I did was not be their mother.
我做的不过是不做他们的老妈
Look, I don't get it either, but for some reason...
这其中的道理我也不懂 但出于某种原因
the kids respond better to other adults.
孩子们都比较愿意听其他大人的话
Yeah, but that's not fair.
是啊 但那太不公平了
Well, most of being a parent isn't fair.
为人父母大部分时候都没有公平可言
Right now, Alex is obsessed
现在艾丽克斯迷上了
with some CEO business woman author
一个什么CEO商业女强人作家
who's basically an older-looking version of me.
她基本上就是个看起来老一点版本的我
We're the same age, by the way.
顺带一提我和她同龄
You know that Alex look up to you, right?
你知道艾丽克斯很崇拜你 对吧
Not by anything she says, no.
从她对我说的话里还真听不出来
Yeah, they never say it.
他们从不说出口
I guess they think
我猜他们认为
that they're giving the parents too much power.
说出口会让父母有太多掌控权了
They find little ways to express it.
他们像掉饼干渣一样用些小细节展示出来
Being a mom is like being a model.
当孩子妈就像当模特一样
You have to learn how to live on crumbs.
得习惯舔着那一点饼干渣过日子
Hi, honey.
宝贝你回来了
Right.
好吧
Honey, I'm so sorry about the way I was tonight.
宝贝 我为我今晚的行为道歉
It's okay.
没关系的
I actually got to go backstage and meet Nancy.
我还因此得到机会去后台见南希呢
She invited a few of us out for coffee.
她请我们几个去喝咖啡
Oh, fun.
挺好玩的
Yeah, no, uh, not fun, actually.
对 不 其实不好玩
All she did was talk about herself.
她一直在那聊她自己
It really just seemed like she wanted an audience.
好像她其实只是需要听众
And when the check came, you know what she didn't do?
当账单送过来的时候 你猜她没做什么
Grab it.
抓住它
Sorry.
对不起
Joe's sleeping in the couch.
乔在沙发上睡觉
Can he stay here? Okay, thank you so much.
他能待在这吗 好的 太感谢了
Well, I mean, the night wasn't a total waste.
但今晚也不是完全没有收获
After she left, I sat there thinking,
她走了之后 我坐在那想
"Why am I taking a business course anyway?"
"我为什么要选一门商务课"
I should go out in the world and do something.
世界那么大 我该去做点什么
So I saw a help-wanted sign in the coffee shop
所以我看到了咖啡馆里的招聘启示
and got a job as a barista.
然后得到了一份咖啡师的工作
Really?
真的吗
Yeah, I start tomorrow.
真的 明天开始
I'm excited.
我很兴奋
I just thought, why not get out there
我刚还在想 为什么不出去
and get my hands a little dirty, you know?
把手弄脏[亲自干活]
Good night.
晚安
Good night.
晚安
Sauna over here.
桑拿在这
Hot tub that way.
浴缸在那里
Legend has it that the holes
传说单人淋浴隔间
in the individual shower partitions
里面的洞
were cigar holders.
是用来当雪茄架的
也可以是性交用的寻欢洞
At least that's the story we're sticking to.
至少这是我们对外坚持的说法
Follow me, folks.
跟我来 伙计们
Ever been in here, Jay?
来过这吗 杰
This looks like a good place
这里看上去是个
to sweat out some Peach Melba.
吃完甜点后 出场大汗的减肥好地方
What did you do?
你干了什么
I'm stuck.
我卡住了
I think there's a wet towel wedged underneath the door.
我觉得门缝里卡了一条湿毛巾
Could you pull on it?
你能把它拉出来吗
Is this gonna happen all the time now?
以后要整天这样了吗
Me babysitting you every minute of the day?
我是不是得无时无刻照看你
It won't budge.
它根本不动
Oh, wait, I think I found the emergency button.
等等 我觉得我找到了紧急按钮
No, no! Okay!
不不 好吧
Jay, I'm trying not to panic.
杰 我已经努力不发慌了
Stand back -- I'm gonna throw
后退 我要拿一块紧急安全石
one of these emergency rocks through the glass!
砸穿这块玻璃了
That's hot!
好烫
I'm texting the front desk.
我在给前台发短信
Listen, Phil, I can't do this.
听着 菲尔 我做不到
You're leaving me here?!
你要离开我了吗
No, I can't have you at this club!
不 我不能忍受你在这个俱乐部
This is my place, damn it.
这是我的地盘 见鬼
No!
I'm sorry, Phil.
对不起 菲尔
Can't you find another club?
你不能另找一个俱乐部吗
I mean, look at my life.
看看我的生活
I mean, I built my house,
我建好了自己的房子
and before I even lived in it, I got married.
还没等我住进去 我就结婚了
And that's fantastic.
是挺棒的
And then I have my study,
然后我有了自己的书房
where I can close the door and have a glass of Scotch.
在那我可以关上门喝一杯苏格兰威士忌
And now it's Joe's room, and that's fantastic.
而现在那是乔的房间 也挺好的
But this is the only place I have left
但这里是我仅剩的唯一的
that I don't have to share with my family.
不用和家人分享的空间
I don't want to be that guy, but did you send that text yet?
我不想当打断你的白痴 但你发出信息了吗
The one place I feel special --
唯一我觉得特别的地方
they call me "Ace" and "Jay Boy" and "Pritch."
他们喊我王牌或者杰哥或者普里契
I'm not comfortable other places, okay?
我在别的地方都没在这里痛快 好吗
But you -- you fit in everywhere.
而你 你在哪都能融入
The whole world is your club!
整个世界都是你的俱乐部
But I have this place!
但我只有这个地方
You get that, right?
你懂了吧
Maintenance arrived one minute later
维护人员一分钟后就到了
and packed him in ice from the seafood bar,
用海鲜吧里的冰块把他包了起来
and he was as good as new.
然后他就完好如初了
How you feeling?
你觉得怎么样
Better.
好点了
Jay, I was thinking about what you said before.
杰 我在想你刚刚说的话
It was so honest and sensitive.
如此真诚 敏感
And vulnerable.
和脆弱
Hey.
No one needs to know about that.
这件事天知地知你知我知
Anyway, this is your club.
不管怎样 这是你的俱乐部
I'm -- I'm dropping out.
我退出吧
Well, you deserve it just as much as I do.
不 你和我一样理应享受这一切
It's fine.
没事的
I can't let you give all this up.
我不能让你放弃这一切
For God's sake, there's the club chair
拜托 俱乐部里有
Fatty Arbuckle anxiously awaited his verdict.
胖子阿巴寇坐着焦急地等待裁决的椅子
阿巴寇是好莱坞默片时代喜剧明星 被指控强奸致人死亡审判三年后无罪释放
Jay, I mean it.
杰 我是真心的
Well, at least let me give you something in return.
好吧 至少让我送你些什么作为补偿
You name it.
你说吧
Really?
真的吗
- Yeah. - Well...
-对 -那么
I don't like how happy you look right now.
我不喜欢你现在超级开心的样子
This is living, huh?
这才是活着 不是吗
How long do we have this thing for?
我们得在这待多久
Only three hours.
只有三个小时
You saw the sign.
你看到标志了吗
Every bounce counts!
每一跳都有价值
Yes!
太棒了
Get you some! Get it!
跳起来 跳啊
The way things ended with me and Vlad, it always haunted me.
我和弗拉德分手的那些事还令我心有余悸
Cam wasn't wrong about this.
小卡没说错
We paid for the whole seat,
我们买了全票
but we're only using the edge of it.
但只看懂了它的边角
You know, I only owe you so much.
你知道吗 我只欠你这么多
You don't get an unlimited number of these.
我对你的补偿也是有限的
Tammy, you are never gonna believe who's here.
泰咪 你绝不会相信谁在这里
- Who? - Vlad.
-谁 -弗拉德
Oh, my God, where?
我的天 在哪
Out there.
在那里
I think might duck out early.
我觉得我得早点溜了
There he is. That's Vlad.
他在那 他就是弗拉德
Lucky!
太幸运了
Vlad! Vlad! Vlad! Vlad! Vlad!
弗拉德 弗拉德 弗拉德