摩登家庭 第十季 Modern Family Season 10 第9集: Putting Down Roots

上映日期: 2,018

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧 / 家庭

导演: 盖尔·曼库索 / 斯蒂文·莱维坦

演员: 艾德·奥尼尔 / 索菲娅·维加拉 / 朱丽·鲍温 / 泰·布利尔 / 杰西·泰勒·弗格森 / 艾瑞克·斯通斯崔特 / 萨拉·海蓝德 / 阿芮尔·温特 / 诺兰·古德 / 里克·罗德里格兹 / 奥布里·


台词
What the hell?
搞什么鬼
Oh, my God. He brought Mom's old car?
我的天 他把妈的旧车也拖来了
You know, that thing was perfect for Dede --
要知道 那玩意再适合迪迪不过了
loud, pulled way to the left,
又吵 又偏左[派]
and constantly broke down in public.
还总在公共场合抽风
My ex-wife, Dede, died two months ago,
我前妻迪迪两个月前去世了
and her husband, Jerry, drove down with a bunch of junk
她丈夫杰瑞把她想留给我们的破烂
she wanted us to have.
都拉了过来
I always liked Jerry.
我一直很喜欢杰瑞
Then why did you always look at him funny?
那你为什么总用奇怪的眼神看他
Because I knew what he was in for.
因为我知道他所要面临的悲惨命运
Same way I look at the footage of those people
我看人们登上泰坦尼克号的录像时
boarding the Titanic.
也是那种眼神
Jay, this is for you.
杰 这是给你的
Oh, God. Is that her?
老天爷 那是她的灰吗
No, no, no. Apparently this is a jar of sand
不不不 这是你们度蜜月时
from your honeymoon in Miami Beach.
从迈阿密海滩带回的沙子
Oh, yeah. We stayed at the Fontainebleau.
是啊 当时我们住在枫丹白露酒店
‭Guess who we took an elevator with?
猜猜我们在电梯里遇到了谁
Jackie Gleason.
杰基·格利森[演员]
I told him we were the honeymooners,
我告诉他我们才在《蜜月期》
and, as a joke, he threatened to punch Dede to the moon.
他开玩笑威胁要把迪迪揍到月亮上去
Why is that funny?
笑点在哪
Well, that's my point. It wasn't right.
我就是这个意思 哪里好笑
Claire, your mom wanted you to have her old sports car.
克莱尔 你妈想把她的旧跑车留给你
Oh, great.
太好了
And Mitchell, you get to keep her jewelry.
米奇尔 她的珠宝给你
Oh, so Claire gets a car,
这么说克莱尔得到了跑车
and I get a, uh, box of turquoise.
而我得到了一盒子绿松石
Want to trade?
你想交换吗
No. No, it's fine.
不 这样挺好的
I have a preteen girl at home,
我家有个"不到十三岁的少女"
and she likes to play dress-up.
"她"喜欢玩扮装游戏
And, you know, Lily might like it, too.
再说 莉莉或许也会喜欢
Mitchell and Claire, Dede wanted you two to decide
米奇尔 克莱尔 迪迪想让你俩决定
who gets to keep her.
谁把她带回家
Sorry, Jay. She left you out of this one.
抱歉 杰 她没把你包括在内
No worries, Jerr. I'm good with the sand.
别担心 杰瑞 我有沙子就够了
Hang on. Uh, what do you mean, "Gets to keep her"?
等等 你说"把她带回家"是什么意思
That's Dede.
那就是迪迪
We had her ashes organically fused with the root ball.
我们把她的骨灰和根垛有机融合在一起了
That is so Mom.
太像老妈的风格了
I know. Setting up one last thing for us to fight over,
是啊 最后还要留样东西让我们争
because neither of us want that tree.
因为我们谁都不想要那棵树
Because both of us want the tree.
因为我们都想要那棵树
What?
什么
That was easy.
轻松解决
家 庭
摩 登
第十季 第九集
Oh, cool.
Look. Nana left us her old toy box from her house.
看 外婆把她家的旧玩具箱留给我们了
Aww, bless her hoarding heart.
保佑她那颗有囤积症的心
Remember how I used to hide in here
还记得我过去总躲在这里
and pop out like a scary monster?
像吓人的怪物一样跳出来吗
I had so much promise back then.
那时的我未来还一片大好
A stick horse that vibrates?
能震动的棍马
I never got the point.
我一直搞不懂用意
I don't know,
我说不好
but I remember spending hours riding on it.
但我记得过去一"骑"就是好久
Same.
我也是
Oh. Lookie here, Alex.
快看这个 艾丽克斯
The source of your greatest shame --
你最大屈辱的根源
the puzzle that I solved but you never did.
我能解开但你解不开的积木拼图
Who cares?
谁在乎
We were just dumb kids.
当时我们都是蠢小孩
Uh, no.
We were dumb kids,
我们才是蠢小孩
and you were the genius.
而你是小天才
That must eat away at you.
那肯定让你寝食难安吧
Please.
拜托
I'm top of my class at a prestigious university,
我是名牌大学的尖子生
and I co-invented a technology
我和别人共同发明了一种
that has applications to astrophysics and medicine.
应用于天体物理学和医学的技术
And give me that damn puzzle!
把那该死的积木拼图给我
Oh, my God, it's Lulu!
我的天 是露露
She was my favorite toy.
她曾是我最喜欢的玩具
I guess I-I just really miss Nana.
我猜我只是很想念外婆
Also I'm pregnant.
我还怀孕了
Dylan and I haven't told anyone
迪兰和我还没告诉任何人
because I'm still trying to get my head around it,
因为我还在努力接受这个事实
but holding Lulu made it so real.
可抱着露露让一切变得那么真实
I'm gonna have an actual baby.
我就要有一个活生生的宝宝了
Aah, I'm so stressed!
我压力好大
I wish it was the '50s
我真希望现在还是五十年代
when it was still healthy to drink and smoke
那时人们还认为怀孕时喝酒抽烟
when you're pregnant.
不会不健康
I cannot wait to restore this baby.
我等不及翻新这台宝贝了
My high school bully had one.
高中时欺负我的恶霸就有一台
You'd be surprised how fast this thing can go.
你肯定想不到这车能跑多快
No problem catching up with a kid on a bike
能轻松追上骑着单车
who left school 10 minutes early.
提前十分钟离校逃跑的孩子
I don't know if I want another
我不确定我希望车库里
half-finished project rusting away in the garage.
又多一件慢慢生锈的半成品
The only reason I stopped working on robot lawnmower
我放弃机器割草机的唯一原因
was 'cause he started getting too smart.
是因为它开始变得太聪明了
Come on, honey. Let's keep it.
别这样 亲爱的 我们留着吧
It reminds me of how crazy my mom could be.
它让我想起我妈能有多疯狂
I mean, what mother has a car like this?
什么样的老妈会有这样的车
How's this? We take it for one drive.
这样如何 我们开出去兜一圈
If you're not smiling by the time we come back,
假如回来时你脸上没有笑容
we get rid of it.
我们就不要了
- One drive? - ‭One drive.
-只兜一圈 -只兜一圈
- One drive. - ‭One drive.
-只兜一圈 -只兜一圈
Ugh, she used to double-buckle me and Mitchell
她过去总把我和米奇尔
into the front seat.
一起绑在副驾
Between that and the homemade electric blankets,
再加上她自制的电热毯
it's a wonder we're still alive.
我俩还活着简直是奇迹
What's with the plumber?
怎么请了水管工
Did Joe flush his Aquaman down the toilet again?
乔又把海王玩具冲下马桶了吗
No. When my cousins left,
不 我那些亲戚离开时
they said that the hot water in the guest bedroom was not working.
告诉我客房没有热水
The plumber just said that there's nothing wrong.
水管工刚才说一切正常
Someone turned it off.
是有人把热水关了
Probably Joe.
八成是乔
So, what are we thinking?
我们要怎么罚他
No play dates for a week?
一周不准约小朋友来家玩
I know it was you.
我知道是你关的
You wanted them gone, and you froze them out.
你想让他们走 就把他们冻走了
I'm admitting nothing,
我不承认有做过
but you said one cousin would be here for one day,
但你说你的一个亲戚会来这里住一天
and there were three here for a week.
结果三个人在这里住了一周
I never said that.
我才没说过
Why is Jerry still here?
为什么杰瑞还在这
I know. Something must be wrong.
是啊 肯定出什么事了
He's sitting in the car like a sad little man.
他像个受伤的小老头一样坐在车里
We have to go and invite him in.
我们得让他进来坐坐
No, no, no, no. He'll move off eventually.
别 别 别 他总会走的
Glor-- Street sweeping is Thursday.
歌洛... 周四的街道清扫会扫走他的
Jerry, is everything okay?
杰瑞 你还好吗
Yeah, does your truck need a push?
你的车需要人帮忙推一把吗
It's the darnedest thing.
这就是最该死的地方
I can't seem to drive away.
我好像开不走了
Dropping off Dede's stuff was the last check on the ol' list.
放下迪迪的东西是要做的最后一件事
Heck if I'm now feeling pretty lost.
我现在很迷茫[迷路]
Yeah, I get it. Listen, you just drive down this street,
我懂 你沿这条街往前开
turn right, and you'll hit the freeway.
右转 就到高速路了
Jerry, just come inside.
杰瑞 进来坐坐吧
No, I couldn't.
不了 我不用了
Yeah, got to love a man with pride.
对 要爱戴有尊严的男人
That's the thing that'll serve you well on the freeway.
那颗自豪的心送你快乐上高速
Just come inside, I'll make you something to eat,
进来吧 我给你做点吃的
and you can stay as long as you want.
你想待多久就待多久
Right, Jay?
是吧 杰
One of these days, Gloria.
总有一天 歌洛莉亚
One of these days what?
总有一天干嘛
Nothing. Just one of these days.
没什么 我就随口一说
All right. Where should we put Mom?
好了 我们把妈妈放在哪里好呢
Uh, not too close to the window.
不能离窗户太近
Don't want to spend the next 20 years whispering.
不想以后二十年为了不让她听到小声说话
Okay, so, your mom can be a tree,
好 这么说 你妈可以是棵树
but when I told you my Uncle Honus
但是我跟你说我的叔叔霍纳斯
fell into a thresher and the next spring,
跌进打谷机 结果来年春天
an owl appered with his exact face
一只长得和他一模一样猫头鹰带着他的
and pocket watch, you poo-pooed it.
怀表出现的时候 你嗤之以鼻
Why are you being so difficult?
你为什么非要为难我
Because when we first got together,
因为我们最初在一起的时候
you promised that someday we would move back
你答应我有一天我们会搬回
to my family farm, and every year,
我们家的农场 但是每一年
the someday gets kicked further down the road
这所谓的终有一天都被抛在脑后
like a nosy census taker.
像爱管闲事的人口普查员被嫌弃一样
And -- And once you plant your mom here,
而且 一旦你把你妈种在这里
we're never gonna leave.
我们就永远别想走了
That's crazy.
这么说有点过
And I-I-I don't think you want to talk
而且我 我觉得你应该不想
about promises we made back then.
跟我扯到我们以前做过的承诺吧
What are you suggesting?
你什么意思
- I've kept every promise I've made. - ‭Really?
-我说到的都做到了 -真的吗
You promised me a rose a month for the rest of my life,
你答应过在我余生的每个月送我一枝玫瑰
so I guess I dropped dead 15 years ago.
所以我估计这么算我已经死了十五年了
I read an article that said it was environmentally ins--
我读了一篇文章说这样对环境...
I've never seen you read an article.
我就没见你看过书
Also, you said you'd finally watch "E.T.",
还有 你说你一定会看《E.T》
my all-time favorite movie.
我有史以来的最爱电影
Oh, it just seems so stupid.
那个电影太蠢了
What am I caring about?
有什么好看的
A wrinkly puppet with a Christmas light
一个皱巴巴的木偶
at the end of his creepy finger?
吓人的指尖还长着圣诞彩灯
And really? Me saying I would watch
真要这么比吗 我说我会看
some pandering sap-fest is the same
什么感人热泪电影和你答应我有一天
as you saying I would someday be reunited with my family?
我能和家人重聚能一样吗
A promise is a promise.
承诺就是承诺
I couldn't agree more.
太同意了
I couldn't agree more.
简直不能更同意
So, anyway, you haven't missed much around here.
所以 你基本没错过多少好戏
I'm sorry to be such a burden.
抱歉给你们添麻烦
It's just I don't know how to move on.
我不知道怎么从这件事走出来
I've been going through incense like crazy.
我一直在拼命烧香
Oh, poor man.
可怜人
Here. Eat something.
来 吃点东西
I know you're a vegetarian, so I made you tomato soup.
我知道你吃素 所以我做了番茄汤
That looks pretty good. You have any left over for me?
看起来很好吃 有没有给我剩一点
Aw, I threw it out.
我扔了
I know that you don't like things staying around too long.
我知道你不喜欢任何东西待太久
She's mad at me.
她在生我的气
Her family overstayed their welcome,
她的亲戚待得太久了 我不欢迎他们
and I turned off the hot water,
就把热水停了
took a few bulbs out of the room.
还把房间里的灯泡卸了几个
You know how it is when you're married.
你懂的 婚后生活
Dede and I never had a cross word.
迪迪和我从没拌过嘴
What?
真的假的
That is not possible.
那不可能
Yep. If things ever got heated,
是真的 如果气氛开始紧张
I'd come up behind her,
我就走到她身后
put my hands on her neck...
把我的手缠绕到她脖子上
I'm with you so far.
这想法我也有过
...then massage her and tell her she was right.
然后给她按摩 跟她说她是对的
But what if she wasn't right?
但是如果是她的错呢
That's ego talking.
那只是自尊心作祟
In Buddhism, we believe it's better to conquer yourself
在佛教里 我们相信战胜自己
than win a thousand battles.
要比赢一千场战役好得多
That's why Nepal is always crushing it at the Olympics.
怪不得尼泊尔每次奥运都"大获全胜"
Jay, an enlightened man would go over there
杰 明智的男人会走过去
and say, "Gloria, I love and respect you,
说"歌洛莉亚 我爱你并且尊重你"
so of course I love and respect your family.
所以毋庸置疑我也爱你的家人且尊重他们
I am sorry."
对不起"
But it was all her fault.
但是都是她的错
She wouldn't admit it, but she told me
她不愿意承认 但是她跟我说的就是
one person was staying with us for one day.
一个亲戚来这待一天
That's her text, but what was her subtext?
这是她的原话[短信] 但是她言下之意是什么
Jerry, you're a genius.
杰瑞 你真是个天才
She sent me a text.
她给我发过短信
I have the proof.
我有证据
Gloria?
歌洛莉亚
- What? - Right here.
-干嘛 -看这里
You don't have to walk over here.
你不用走过来
I can read your giant font from across the room.
你字体那么大我从房间那头都能看见
"Jay, don't call the police when you come home.
"杰 回家之后不要报警
It's my cousin.
家里的是我亲戚
He's staying with us for one day."
他要跟我们住一天"
Let me see.
我看看
Walk me through that Buddhist nonsense again.
再跟我捋一遍那个佛教的胡说八道
Fun, huh? Feel that wind and smell that air.
有意思吧 享受着耳边风吹和清新空气
Yeah, it's so bumpy.
是啊 这车太颠簸了
Sports suspension. Nothing between me and the road
那是运动化悬挂系统 我和路之间毫无阻碍
except my knuckle-less gloves.
除了我的露关节手套
Why do you even have those?
你为什么会有这玩意
Oh, a quirk of the Dunphys.
这是邓菲家族的怪癖
My fingers get cold, but my knuckles get hot.
我的手指怕冷 但我的指关节怕热
Check it out!
快看啊
There's an 8-track player. I love it.
有能放八首歌的音响 我超喜欢的
Let's crank something.
我们来听歌吧
Never heard of this band -- Head Cleaner.
没听说过这支乐队 "磁头清洁带"
Yeah, why don't we just listen to whatever's in there?
里面有什么我们就听什么吧
Oh, my God.
老天啊
- Oh, this takes me back. - Yeah, I love it.
-这首歌让我回到了从前 -是啊 我好爱
♪ Get your motor goin' ♪
♪ 发动汽车 ♪
♪ Heading for the doorway ♪
♪ 朝门口驰骋而去 ♪
♪ Cooking an adventure ♪
♪ 烹煮一场冒险 ♪
♪ And then we make that doorway ♪
♪ 然后朝门口驰骋而去 ♪
So fun!
好好玩
You're smiling. You love the car.
你笑了 你喜欢这辆车
Ah, I just remembered something.
我刚想起件事
What? Tell me.
什么事 告诉我
It's a -- It's a thing from high school.
是我高中时的事
Come on. There are no secrets on the open road.
快说嘛 大路上没有秘密
I just remembered that I lost my virginity in this car.
我刚想起我在这辆车上破的处
What's that now?
你说什么来着
Yeah, my boyfriend snuck the car out at night
我男朋友晚上偷偷把车开出来
and then, you know...
然后 你懂的
♪ He found the doorway ♪
♪ 他找到了"门口" ♪
Oh, my knuckles are overheating.
我的指关节热到不行了
This isn't bothering you, is it, Phil?
你很在意这件事 是吗 菲尔
I mean, you told me about your first time.
你也告诉过我你的第一次啊
I told you about that to explain why I hate bees so much.
我是为了解释我为何讨厌蜜蜂才说的
Let's just not talk about this anymore.
我们别再讨论这事了
Okay.
好吧
♪ Born to be wild ♪
♪ 天生狂野 ♪
This is the song that was playing, isn't it?
当时播的就是这首歌 对吧
It's one of them.
是其中一首
I'm gonna fix lunch. Want some?
我去做午饭 你们要吃吗
You're eating lunch?
你居然要吃午饭
Is there some new Internet challenge I'm not aware of?
是不是有什么我不知道的新网络挑战
And why is your doll in bandages?
还有 你的娃娃为什么绑了绷带
You know me. I always loved playing doctor.
你知道我的 我小时候就很爱玩医生游戏
The truth is, I accidentally ran her over
其实我不小心开车碾过她
and ripped her arm off, which might have been fine
把她胳膊扯断了 本来也没什么
if that was the only baby-mangling issue I had today.
但可惜那并不是我今日唯一一次要害死婴儿
Oh, my God!
天啊
Oh, my God.
天啊
I'm not cut out to be a mother.
我不是当妈的料
Then again, a real baby is easier than a doll, right?
但话说回头 真正的婴儿比娃娃好照顾 对吧
Like, a real baby would let you know
真正的婴儿着火了
if it was on fire.
会让大人知道
Oh, God, why are you crying?
老天 你为什么在哭
Did you just win the weirdest beauty pageant ever?
你是不是刚赢下最古怪的选美比赛
Promises kept, Mitchell -- 180 months of roses,
我遵守承诺了 米奇尔 180个月的玫瑰
and I just watched the most beautiful love story
以及我刚看了男孩和外星人之间的
between boy and alien.
最美好的爱情故事
Why can't the world have the hearts of children?
世人为何就不能拥有孩童般的心呢
You know, I think the thing that touched me the most
我想最令我感动的部分是
was how we were really rooting for E.T. to find
我们全力支持ET找到
his way home.
回家的路
I bet you were pretty thrilled
你不小心发现"回家"这个巧合
to stumble upon that coincidence.
一定很激动吧
I didn't hate it.
我是不讨厌啦
Anyway, I'm all caught up in the promises department.
总之 我的承诺都兑现了
Your serve.
轮到你了
Cam, I just started at the D.A.'s office.
小卡 我刚开始到地检署上班
I -- I can't move anytime soon.
短期内不能搬家
Plus, what about Lily's school?
再说 莉莉上学怎么办
They have schools in Grasshopper.
我老家也有学校啊
Do they?
真的有吗
- Plus, Lily has so many friends here. - Does she?
-再说 莉莉在这里有很多朋友 -真的有吗
Did I hear my name?
你们在讲我吗
What are you two yentas gabbing about?
你们俩八婆在瞎聊什么呢
We were just talking about
我们刚在讨论
moving to Grandma and Grandpa's farm
搬去爷爷奶奶的农场
in -- in the heart of Tornado Alley.
就在龙卷风多发地区的中心
Oh, God. Cam -- Cam. Look, she's clearly terrified.
天啊 小卡 你看 她都吓坏了
Yeah, well, don't worry, sweetie,
好吧 别担心 亲爱的
because it's already been determined.
因为这事已经定下了
We're staying here forever,
我们这辈子都留在这里
because other daddy is planting dead Nana in the backyard.
因为另一个爸爸要把去世的奶奶种到后院里
I'm out.
我不玩了
Okay, it was my mother's last wish
让其中一个孩子接收她的骨灰
that one of us take her, and Claire doesn't want her.
是我妈妈的遗愿 而克莱尔不想要她
What do you want me to do?
你想让我怎么做
Well, what do you want me to do?
那你想让我怎么做
The farm has been in my family for 100 years.
那个农场已经在我家族手中百年了
You know, I'm next in line, and you know Daddy.
下一个继承人是我 你也知道我爸的
H-He's slowing down.
他身体大不如前了
Your mother just sent us a video of him
你妈刚给我们发了他赢得
winning a log-rolling contest.
水上踩滚木比赛的视频
Only in his age group, and he was so spent the next day,
他参加的是老年组 而且第二天他累坏了
he slept through his first rooster crow
公鸡第一次打鸣他都没醒来
and his snooze rooster crow.
叫赖床的打鸣他也没醒
Just admit it -- you have no intention
你就承认吧 你根本没打算
of keeping your promise of moving to Missouri.
遵守承诺 搬去密苏里州
You know what? You're right.
其实 你说得对
I -- I can't ever imagine myself living on that farm. I'm sorry.
我永远无法想象自己住在那个农场里 抱歉
Well, there it is.
你说出来了
I'm just glad E.T. didn't land at your house.
我真庆幸ET不是降落在你家里
Okay, don't give me that look.
别用那种眼神看我
You'll get to go back to Missouri
你以后会回密苏里州的
when your mom gets released from pris-- uh, princess camp.
等你妈从监... 公主营回来
You're really hitting the gum pretty hard, aren't you?
你口香糖嚼得很凶嘛 是不是
How do I do this? Do I -- Do I just push down?
我该怎么做 就这么压下去吗
I don't know.
我不知道啊
Nope.
不行
I got off to a slow start,
我一开始不太顺利
but eventually I -- I found my rhythm.
但最终我找到了自己的节奏
And -- And once I broke that sprinkler line,
而且 在我弄断洒水器的管子后
the -- the water did most of the digging for me.
漏出来的水基本帮我把坑挖好了
All right, let's go. Just one last pull.
来吧 再拉一下就行了
Ah! Ah, okay, that's my ankle.
压到脚踝了
‭I'm stuck.
我卡住了
Cal, so, what I'm gonna need you to do is go insi--
卡尔 我要你进去...
Cal. Cal!
卡尔 卡尔
What? What is it, boy?
什么 你说什么 孩子
Mitchell?
米奇尔
H-He's in trouble?
他遇到麻烦了
Trapped in a hole? Show me.
困在洞里了 快带我去
- Oh, my God, you're cheating. - ‭No.
-天啊 你在作弊 -我没有
You're looking at ways to solve the puzzle.
你明显在看拼图攻略啊
How'd you do it, you pea-brain?
那不然你怎么拼得出 你这蠢货
What is wrong with me?
我怎么回事
Maybe Dr. Johnson is right.
也许约翰逊博士说得对
Maybe I don't have what it takes to live on Mars.
我真的没有住到火星上的心理素质
Stop! Stop.
住手 住手
It's not you.
不是你的错
After I solved the puzzle,
我拼完拼图后
I wanted to make sure you couldn't,
我想让你拼不起来
so I broke a few pieces,
所以我拆了几片
glued some others together.
跟其它的粘在一起
It can't be solved.
你不可能拼起来的
I've had nightmares over that puzzle!
我都因为这破拼图做噩梦了
I cried about it in therapy!
心理治疗时还因为这个哭了
Stop! Not the hair! You're gonna fizz it.
不 别碰头发 发型都搞乱了
Hey, what the hell? Break it up.
怎么回事 松手啊
Luke's not playing fair.
卢克玩黑的
Yeah, well, you make him feel dumb,
是啊 你让他觉得自己很笨
and he acts like it doesn't bother him,
他还表现出毫不在意的样子
but it does. And, Luke,
但他真的在意 还有卢克
you know better than to mess with someone so uptight.
这么耍一个焦虑的人可不像你啊
What do we always say?
我们怎么说的来着
Don't break Alex. She's our safety net.
不许玩坏艾丽克斯 她是我们的人生保障
Now, you both need to calm down.
现在 你俩都冷静点
Luke, walk it off.
卢克 走开冷静一下
Oh, no.
糟糕
Where's Lulu?
露露在哪儿
Wh--
The doll?
娃娃吗
Who cares?
谁在乎啊
Haley, what's going on with you today?
海莉 你今天怎么回事
Are you okay?
你还好吗
Okay, um...
好吧
So, no one else knows, especially Mom and Dad,
别人都不知道 特别是老爸老妈
so you can't tell anybody, but...
你不能告诉任何人
I'm pregnant.
我怀孕了
You're pregnant?
你怀孕了
Damn it, Luke!
靠 卢克
Guys, don't look at me like that, okay?
拜托 你们别这样看我好吗
You must think I'm some irresponsible idiot, don't you?
你们肯定觉得我是不负责任的蠢货吧
Um, uh, it's a -- Wow, that's --
这个 有点
You got -- That's a lot to process.
你怀 信息量好大
I...
D-Do you know who's the --
你知道孩子爸爸是...
It's Dylan's.
是迪兰
Oh. What a joyous --
这样很好啊
Oh, save it.
省省吧
He's been great, actually.
他其实表现得很好
I'm the disaster. I mean, look at Lulu.
我才一团糟 你看露露
I'm gonna be a horrible mother.
我一定会是个糟糕的母亲
Okay, first, it's just a doll.
首先 这只是个娃娃
And you've been taking care of us our whole lives.
而且我们从小其实就一直受你照顾啊
Yeah. Remember how you used to pick out
对啊 记不记得以前你总帮我挑
my first day of school outfit so I wouldn't get beat up?
我的开学日服装 免得我挨揍
Or how you'd hold the book
还有我给自己读睡前故事时
while I read myself a bedtime story?
你总是帮我撑着书
And you're still doing it.
你现在还是啊
You just swooped in and handled our fight like a pro.
还有你刚刚跑过来 轻而易举阻止了我们打架
And you're understanding and loving and a total badass.
你这么善解人意 又有爱心 还霸气四射
She's right.
她说得对
You're the kind of person that can patch things up
你总是能够平息矛盾
if, say, Alex ever found out
比如 如果艾丽克斯发现
that I re-arranged the stickers on her Rubik's Cube.
我修改了她的魔方上的贴纸
You son of a --
你这个混...
Aah! Hair, hair! Haley, help!
头发 头发 海莉救我
Oh. Well, I'm smiling,
好吧 我都乐开花了
so I guess we're keeping the car.
我想这辆车可以留下来了
No, you know what? You're right.
不 你知道吗 你说得对
It's not safe, and it's just gonna take up space.
这车不安全 只会占地儿
Honey, did I say something wrong?
亲爱的 我说错什么
Are you feeling bad?
让你不舒服了吗
Well, I-I guess if I'm being honest,
我想说实话
I'm a-a little worried that every time I get in the car,
我有点担心我一坐进这车里头
I'll picture you and, uh...
我就会想象你和...
Todd.
陶德
- Todd? - ‭Todd.
-陶德 -陶德
Todd was the name of my bully.
以前霸凌我的人也叫陶德
It's getting realer.
感觉更真实了
I mean, how would you feel
要是换作是你
about driving around in the sweet ride
开一辆我在里面失去第一次的豪车
I lost my virginity in?
会是什么感觉
Do you really think you can track down
你觉得你真能找到那辆
the ox cart from the Renaissance fair?
文艺复兴主题市集上的牛车吗
I only got to second base in the ox cart.
我在牛车上只进行到二垒
If it makes you uncomfortable, we can sell the car.
如果你觉得不舒服 我们就把车卖掉
- Really? - ‭Yeah.
-真的吗 -当然
Thank you.
谢谢
But for what it's worth,
但无论如何
I don't want to keep it
我不想留这辆车
because I had so much great sex in it.
不是因为我在这里车震爽翻过好多次
- So much? - ‭No, it's because of what happened the next day.
-好多次 -不 是因为第二天发生的事
My mom,
我老妈
ugh, she found the condom wrapper under the seat,
她在车座底下发现了避孕套包装袋
and it must have freaked her out.
她一定很震惊
But instead of shaming me
但是她没有羞辱我
or -- or embarrassing me with some long, awful lecture,
或者给我好好上一课 让我丢脸
she was cool.
她非常酷
She wanted to make sure that I was okay with everything
她只想确认我一切都好
and that it had all been a good experience.
还有那经历也是美好的
But...
但是
That must be why she wanted me to have the car.
这一定是她想让我留着这辆车的原因
That talk meant as much to my mom as it did to me.
那段对话对她和我都很有意义
That's incredibly sweet,
她好贴心啊
and, if it means that much to you, you should keep it.
如果这车真的对你那么重要 你应该留下来
But I doubt I'll ever feel comfortable in it.
但我不知道自己会不会舒服
We can fix that.
这个好办
I like where this is going.
看样子好像不错哦
I'm gonna make you the best sex I ever had in this car.
我要给你我在这里体验过的最棒的车震
That's a lot of pressure. Let's aim for top three.
这样压力太大了 目标前三就好
Gloria. I have something to say.
歌洛莉亚 我有话要说
My approach cost me a phone and a second visit from the plumber,
我的办法浪费了我一部手机 水管工也来了两次
so I decided to try Jerry's advice
所以我决定尝试杰瑞的建议
and give Gloria a heartfelt, sincere apology.
向歌洛莉亚由衷真诚地道歉
How hard could that be to fake?
假装谁不会啊
I was wrong to chase off your cousins.
我不该赶走你的亲戚
I'm sorry that I didn't...
对不起 我没有...
take your feelings into consideration.
也考虑到你的心情
You deserve to be respected.
你应该受到尊重
What I should've said was I love you,
我当时应该说的是我爱你
so I love your family.
所以我也爱你的家庭
Please forgive me for my rude behavior.
请原谅我的无礼之举
Jay, this is all I ever wanted.
杰 我一直就只想要这个而已
For you to come to me like this,
由你主动来对我这样
it means the world to me.
对我真的意义非凡
I'm sorry.
我也很对不起
I should've been more forward about my cousin's visit.
我当时也应该更坦白我亲戚要来的事情
And I was wrong for crushing your cellphone.
也很对不起砸了你的手机
Can you ever forgive me?
你能原谅我吗
Well, it may take a little while, but sure,
或许需要点时间 但这还用说吗
I guess I can.
我当然会原谅你
You know what I'm going to do?
你知道我接下来要怎么做吗
I'm gonna go to that butcher shop that you like.
我要去你喜欢的那家肉店
And, if Jerry doesn't mind,
然后如果杰瑞不介意的话
I'm gonna buy you a beautiful steak for dinner.
我也要给你买一块上好牛排当晚饭
Hey, it's your house. You do what's best for you.
你的家 你怎么方便怎么来
Come to my house, I'm going to be nude.
如果来我家 我能穿多少穿多"少"
We're never going to go to your house, Jerry.
我们永远都不会去你家 杰瑞
Did you hear that, Stella?
你听到了吗 斯黛拉
We're gonna have a steak.
我们有牛排吃啦
Jerry, you're a genius.
杰瑞 你真是个天才
- This is life-changing. - What did I tell you?
-简直改变人生啊 -我怎么跟你说的
I wish I had tried this years ago.
真希望我当年就开始这么做
This would've made my life with Dede downright tolerable.
这样我当年跟迪迪的生活就能勉强熬过去了
Who knows?
谁知道呢
Maybe we even could've been happy.
说不定我们还能有快乐人生
I'm glad you think so.
很庆幸你能这么想
But I'm not the one you need to tell.
但这话跟我说不合适吧
Hey, Dede, it's me, Jay. Just wondering how you're doing.
迪迪 是我 杰 就想跟你问声好
Dad?
Uh, it's Saturday here.
我们这里是周六
You're not leaving a voicemail.
你又不是在语音留言
From the heart.
用心交流
What I wanted to say is
我想跟你说的是
I could've handled a lot of things better in our relationship.
在我们的感情中 我有很多事可以做得更好
I guess I wasn't a very good partner.
我想我当年不是什么好伴侣
I dug in a lot.
常常惹你
I never thought of things from your point of view.
也从没站在你的角度想事情
I guess I always needed to get my own way.
可能我总是只想到满足自己
Anyway, you were a good woman,
总之 你是个好女人
and we had some fun times,
我们也有过一些欢乐时光
especially in the sack.
尤其是床上
Never had a problem there.
"床事"从未有过问题
Careful. That's my wife you're talking to.
谨言慎行 你是在跟我的老婆说话
- Oh, sorry, Jerr, yeah. - ‭Okay.
-抱歉 杰瑞 - 好啦
I hope you grow up into a nice, big tree,
我希望你能够成长为一棵健壮大树
a-and I hope you don't get any of those beetles
也希望你不会染上虫害
that are killing everything.
会弄死植物的那种
And when you settle in in a little while,
等以后你在这落地生根了
maybe I'll bring Joe over and he can climb you.
或许我会带乔来爬你
Mm. ‭Amen.
阿门
You done?
你说完了吗
Yeah, I think so.
应该吧
Mind if I say a word?
不介意我说两句吧
She's all yours.
把她交给你了
Jay was a big man.
杰是个大气男人
He apologized to his wife.
他跟他的老婆道歉了
And do you know what she did?
你知道她怎么做了吗
She apologized back!
她也道歉回去了
Did you ever do that even once?!
你有跟我道歉过一次吗
I apologized to you a thousand times,
我跟你道歉过上千次吧
and you let me just eat it.
而你只让我自己憋着火
Well, I'm tired of telling you you're always right,
我受够跟你说你永远都是对的了
'cause guess what?
因为你猜怎么着
That dolphin did not recognize you.
那只海豚压根就认不得你
Your haikus had too many syllables.
你的俳句有太多音节了
And trust me, vegans do need deodorant!
还有相信我 素食者也需要用止汗除臭剂
All right. Come on.
好啦 走吧
Come on, kid. Let me buy you a nice steak.
来吧 小家伙 让哥请你吃上好牛排
Yeah.
Hey. Here.
来 给
I-I want you to eat something.
我想你吃点东西
Be careful.
小心
Thank you for taking such good care of me,
谢谢你对我这么无微不至
even when you're mad.
哪怕你心里不高兴
No. My gosh, I am not mad.
没 天啊 我没有不高兴
And I shouldn't have pushed.
我也不该逼你的
I-I'm sorry, but, you know, if we learn one thing today,
对不起 但如果我们今天学到一件事
it's that you couldn't survive on a farm.
那就是你不可能在农村里活下来
I'll be fine,
我会没事的
- because I'll be with you. - What?
-因为我会有你的陪伴 -什么
I guess w-when I look at things from your point of view,
我想... 当我用你的角度看这事
I -- I made a promise.
我的确做出了承诺
When your dad needs you to take over the farm,
如果你爸爸真的需要你接手一切
I'm in.
我愿意加入
Mitchell, that means so much to me,
米奇尔 你这话对我意义重大
and you're gonna love it.
你也会喜欢那一切的
The fresh air, and there's no traffic.
清新空气 也没有恼人车潮
Oh, and with a second lawyer in town,
等镇上有你这第二个律师
we could reopen the courthouse.
我们就能重开法院了
H-Have you ever milked a goat?
你给羊挤过奶吗
Have you ever had fresh milk right from the spigot?
你有试过从牛奶罐直接喝刚挤的牛奶吗
Oh, unbelievable.
好喝到不行
You do have to be careful of snakes and mice and rats.
但你也得小心蛇虫鼠蚁
There's a ton of field mice.
那里有巨多田鼠
They scare me. One ran up my sleeve one time when I was a kid.
我很怕 小时候有一只沿着我的袖子爬上来了
This car is smaller than I remember. I think I'm just less flexible?
这车比我印象中小 可能我没那么灵活了
I think I threw out my lap.
我大腿好像抽筋了
We were um... just cleaning out the garage.
我们刚才... 只是在清理车库
Nice try, we heard everything.
少来 我们全听到了
Although around the finish line,
不过在快"结束"的时候
we kind of lose track of who's who.
我们有点不确定哪个声音是谁了
I can't believe Mom caught you having sex in the car again.
真不敢相信妈又抓到你在车上做爱
You are calling the tree Mom?
你叫那棵树妈吗
Okay.
行吧
So listen, after some reflextion,
听我说 在经过一番讨论后
we decided that she might be be off here.
我们觉得她在你这里会比较好
Before you say no.
在你拒绝之前...
I would actually like that.
我也想要这样
Hey! What was those screeching in the garage?
车库里的叫声是怎么回事
Are the raccoons back?
浣熊又回来了嘛
Damn it!