极品老妈第五季双语台词对白剧本

Previously on Mom... ‭

《极品老妈》前情提要

I was thinking I could stay an extra night

我想我可以多留一晚

for the express purpose of taking you out.

为了明天带你出去约会

- I'd really like that. - ‭Oh, great.

-我很愿意 -太好了

Are you kidding me? You can't go out with Adam's brother.

你在开玩笑吗你不能和亚当的弟弟约会

And yet I've got my good bra on and I'm headed out the door.

但我依然穿了好胸罩正要出门

Yeah, but I actually have to get back home tomorrow.

但我明天其实得回家了

I'm gonna miss you.

我会想你的

You think we should try the long-distance thing?

你觉得我俩该试试异地恋吗

I'm game.

我愿意啊

But while I've got you here...

但既然你在我身边

现在...

You ready for your coffee, babe?

想喝咖啡了吗宝贝

No, thanks.

不用了谢谢

Starting today, I am giving it up.

从今天开始我戒了

Seriously?

真的吗

Coffee is your only source of water.

咖啡是你唯一摄取的水分

When did water become such a big thing?

水从什么时候变得这么重要了

Isn't it enough that I bathe in it?

我在水里洗澡难道还不够吗

Where did all this come from?

你为什么心血来潮

I read it on Facebook.

我在脸书上看到的

"Five Things You Should Give Up for a Happier Life."

"放弃五样东西过更快乐的生活"

Was number one Facebook?

第一样是脸书吗

Hey, how come you guys didn't wake me up for school?

你们为什么不叫我起床上学

'Cause you're not seven.

因为你不是七岁小孩

I wish I was. I liked living alone.

我希望我是我喜欢一个人住

You want a bagel?

你要百吉饼吗

Thanks, but all I need is coffee.

谢谢但我只需要咖啡

How sad to be so dependent. I remember those days.

依赖性那么强真可悲我记得那些日子

She gave up coffee 30 seconds ago.

她三十秒前刚戒了咖啡

Good for you.

好样的

You're a dead man.

你死定了

She's just kidding.

她只是在开玩笑

Help me.

救我

Oh, damn.

可恶

I just missed another phone call from Patrick.

我又没接到帕特里克的电话

How does this happen? I was holding my phone in my hand.

怎么会这样我手里一直拿着手机

Why do you hate love?

你为什么讨厌爱情

Why don't you stop playing phone tag

你何不别玩电话捉迷藏了

and just drive down to Santa Cruz to see him?

直接开车去圣克鲁兹见他

When? We have totally opposite schedules.

什么时候去啊我们日程完全不同

Relationships are torture.

恋爱就是折磨

Like waterboarding with sex.

就像用性爱令你窒息

That's the sort of comment that used to bother me

这种话以前会令我生气

when I was under the thumb of the brown god.

在我还受控于棕色之神时

This long-distance thing is just so frustrating.

异地恋真让人沮丧

I'm not sure Patrick and I can make it work.

我不确定帕特里克和我能坚持下去

For what it's worth, I hope you guys figure it out.

无论如何我希望你们能想到办法

Oh, my God, I just missed his call again!

天啊我又没接到他电话

How, how, how?!

怎么会

I'll see ya later.

回见

Boy, I do not miss dating, you know what I mean?

我一点不怀念约会懂我意思吗

Take a sip of your coffee and kiss me.

啜一口咖啡然后亲我

Hey, Patrick, sorry I missed your call, yet again.

帕特里克抱歉没接到你电话又一次

I dropped my phone in the fountain in front of the library.

我把手机掉进图书馆前的喷泉里了

I was making a wish.

我当时在许愿

Actually, I was wishing you would call me.

实际上我许的愿是希望你给我打电话

Ironic, right?

讽刺吧

Is it ironic?

讽刺吗

That's a word I should probably stay away from

在搞清楚这词真正的意思之前

until I figure out what it really means.

我最好别用它

Anyway, my phone still works, so...

总之我的手机没坏

hit me back, as the kids say.

记得电我就像年轻人所说

Yikes.

妈呀

Oh, by the way, this is Christy.

顺便说句我是克丽丝蒂

I should've stopped at "Sorry I missed your call."

说完"抱歉没接到你电话"我就该住嘴了

Excuse me.

打扰了

Don't I know you from that time we slept together?

我们是不是以前睡过

Hi, Cooper.

你好库珀

Sorry, I've been meaning to catch up with you.

抱歉我一直想联系你来着

Oh, now's your chance. You mind if I sit?

现在是你的机会介意我坐这里吗

Kind of a bad time; I-I really got to study.

时机不太好我真得学习

Got it. I won't say a word.

明白了我一句话不说

"Bonjour.

你好

You are the hottest girl in the student center."

你是学生中心最性感的女孩

Cooper, seriously?

库珀你是认真的吗

It's not me. He has a mind of his own.

不怪我他有自己的思想

"And I cannot get you off of it."

而你在我脑子里挥之不去

Very funny.

非常搞笑

"I am not trying to be funny, I am trying to be sexy.

我没想搞笑我想表现得性感点

Hon, hon, hon."

哼哼哼

By being lame?

通过学蹩脚口音吗

"Oh, that depends.

那要看情况了

Is it working, mon petit ketchup packet?"

我成功了吗可爱的小番茄酱

"That was fantastique."

真是太爽了

It worked; knock it off.

成功了别学了

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极品老妈第五季第十集

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校对冰蓝

时间轴冰蓝

Oh, geez, you scared me!

天啊你吓到我了

I thought you gave up coffee.

你不是戒咖啡了吗

后期冰蓝

My head is pounding, my colon's in gridlock,

我头疼结肠堵塞

and I winged a butter plate at Adam, so I'm back on the bean.

我朝亚当丢了黄油盘所以我要复喝

总监冰蓝

Yeah, yeah, good for you.

好吧随你

I had sex with Cooper.

我和库珀做爱了

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I'm sorry, what?

你刚说什么

I know. I feel so guilty.

我知道我很内疚

Why?

为什么

Because I'm seeing someone.

因为我有男友了

Patrick? Oh, come on, you haven't even slept with him.

帕特里克吗拜托你甚至没和他睡过

Believe me, I want to,

相信我我想睡

but our genitals are never in the same ZIP Code.

但我们的生殖器从不在同一个邮区

And that's not gonna change anytime soon,

这点不会很快改变

so you're free to do whatever you want.

所以你可以做任何事

It's like prison. Nobody's married, nobody's gay.

就像在监狱里结婚无所谓搞基无所谓

Whoa, Mom.

妈妈

You actually made me feel better.

你真的让我感觉好些了

Thank you.

谢谢

You act like it's the first--

你表现得就像这是第一次...

You're welcome.

不客气

Ugh, please don't tell Adam.

求你别告诉亚当

Why would I tell him you're cheating on his brother?

我为什么要告诉他你绿了他弟弟

He would see it that way. I don't. Keep hugging.

他会那样想我不那样想继续抱

You never know how much you love something until you give it up.

只有在戒掉以后才知道你多爱某样东西

You realize you're talking to a table full of addicts?

你知道你在跟一桌子的瘾君子说话吧

I don't see the connection.

我看不到有什么联系

So, Christy, I'm confused.

克丽丝蒂我很疑惑

At your age, it's only gonna get worse.

你这年龄只会越来越迷糊

Are you and Cooper dating again?

你和库珀又开始约会了吗

No. It was just a one-time thing.

没有只是一夜情

Well, a two-time thing.

两夜情

I swung by on the way over here.

我过来的时候顺便去找了他

Oh, look at you having it all.

看看你享受一切

If you get a bladder infection, I'm gonna be so proud.

如果你染上了膀胱炎我会很骄傲的

So you like this boy.

所以说你喜欢这男孩

No, I like Patrick.

不我喜欢帕特里克

I'm just having fun with Cooper.

我只是和库珀玩玩

Be careful, with your bladder and your heart.

当心你的膀胱和你的心

I'm fine.

我没事

Guys do this stuff all the time. Why can't I?

男人经常这样做我为什么不行

Because you can't be intimate without getting attached.

因为你一和人亲近难免动感情

Just 'cause I'm sober?

就因为我戒瘾了吗

No, because you're you.

不因为你是这样的人

I can do it, Bonnie can do it...

我能做到邦妮能做到

Can do it blindfolded, and have.

蒙着眼睛都能做到而且已经做过了

I'm doing it right now.

我现在就在做

He's an anesthesiologist. I feel nothing.

他是个麻醉科医师我没任何感觉

I'm sure he doesn't either.

我相信他也没感觉

- Where you headed? - Cooper's.

-你要去哪 -库珀家

Dressed like that?

穿成那样吗

That's the beauty of this thing.

这就是这件事的好处

It requires virtually no effort.

不用费任何力

I text two words: "You up?"

我发短信说起了吗

And bam, it's on.

然后就约上了

One time it auto-corrected to "Soup?" But it still happened.

有次被自动纠正成了"喝汤吗" 但依然约上了

Hey, where you off to?

你去哪

Uh... to the store.

超市

Not the close one, the one across town with the olive bar.

不是关的那家是城市另一边有橄榄专柜的那家

God, I love olives.

天啊我喜欢橄榄

Anyway, I might be a while.

总之我可能要花一段时间

Would you mind picking up some coffee?

介意顺便带点咖啡吗

Your mom's blowing through a bag a day.

你妈妈一天喝一整包

Sure.

当然

Well, as long as you're going... to the store...

既然你要去超市

...could you pick up some soup?

能顺便买点汤吗

Everybody loves a nice, hot, sexy bowl of soup.

人人都爱喝鲜香热腾性感的汤

Yeah, soup would be great.

是的汤挺好的

Got it.

知道了

Coffee and soup.

咖啡和汤

She's the best.

她最好了

My brother does not deserve her.

我弟弟配不上她

Aw, that's sweet.

真贴心

You should've told her that before she left.

你应该在她走之前对她说

Oh, my God, it gets better every time.

天啊一次比一次爽

Sure does.

当然了

I got to go.

我得走了

Wait. Wait.

等等

Why are you always in such a hurry to leave?

你为什么总急着走

Well, I'm busy, you're busy.

我忙你也忙

Busy, busy, busy.

忙忙忙

Yeah, but this is working, right?

但咱俩处得挺好的对吧

Works for me.

我觉得是

I'm free Tuesday at 5:00,

我周二五点有空

as long as I'm back in my car by 20 after.

只要我二十分钟后能回车上就好

Christy, come on.

克丽丝蒂拜托

This isn't just hooking up anymore.

这不再是约炮了

It isn't?

不是吗

No.

不是

I am totally falling in love with you.

我彻底爱上你了

Yup.

是的

♪ Falling in love with you. ♪

爱上你

But you're a 24-year-old guy.

但是你才24岁

24-year-old guys don't fall in love.

24岁的男人不会爱别人

My mom says I'm an old soul.

我妈妈说我有个老灵魂

Well, I am a much older soul.

我的灵魂比你老得多

And I have a lot of baggage.

而且我有很多负担

Lots and lots of baggage.

非常非常多的负担

Then let me help you carry it.

那让我帮你承担

Holy cow.

天啊

Cooper, look, I just don't have the same feelings for you.

库珀我只是对你没有同样的感觉

Well, now I'm a little embarrassed.

现在我有点尴尬了

I booped your nose and everything.

我还摸了你的鼻子什么的

I thought we were just gonna keep it casual,

我以为我们只是随便玩玩

you know, having a good time.

你知道的享受时光

You mean just sex?

你是说只有性吗

Exactly.

完全对

I assumed we were on the same page.

我还以为我们想法一致

Well, we were not.

才不是

So, just to be clear, Tuesday at 5:00 not happening?

我问清楚周二五点没戏了吗

Bonnie, Bonnie, wake up. Bonnie.

邦妮邦妮醒醒

It's sleepy time.

该睡觉了

I'll throw you one in the morning.

我明早再跟你做

Bonnie. Bonnie.

邦妮邦妮

Okay, fine, but it's not gonna be the Fourth of July.

好吧但你不会爽到的

I don't want to have sex.

我不想做爱

Why not? What's wrong with me?

为什么不我哪里不好了

I'm worried about Christy; she never came home from the store.

我担心克丽丝蒂她还没从超市回来

Yeah.

是啊

Well, she takes forever.

她要花很长时间的

She walks down every aisle, she talks to people,

要逛每一个通道跟人聊天

then she has to find someone tall

然后还得找个高个子

to get stuff off the top shelf. It's a circus.

帮她拿货架最上层的东西简直是耍杂技

Why am I more worried about your kid than you are?

我为什么比你更关心你的孩子

God, now you sound like the lady from Child Services.

天啊你就像是儿童服务处的那个女人

- What if she got in an accident? - I think you're overreacting.

-如果她出事故了呢 -我觉得你反应过度了

I think you're underreacting. I'm gonna call the police.

我觉得你心太大了我要报警

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

等等

Plunkett family rule number one: no cops, ever.

普兰科特家庭规则第一条永远不叫条子

What is wrong with you?

你什么毛病啊

You know what? You're right.

知道吗你说得对

I'm gonna text her.

我要给她发短信

Oh. She actually texted me.

她其实给我发短信了

Uh, "Ran into Wendy. She's having a crisis.

碰到了温蒂她遇上了危机

What else is new? Be home late."

每天都这样我晚点回来

Huh. Well, that made me horny. How 'bout you?

老娘反正是饥渴了你呢

Oh, hey, you're still up.

你还没睡啊

Yeah. How's Wendy?

是啊温蒂怎么样

Wendy?

温蒂

Yeah, your mom said she was having a crisis.

是啊你妈妈说她遇上了危机

Oh, yes. Wendy's crisis.

对温蒂的危机

So bad.

非常糟糕

We ate your soup and drank your coffee.

我们喝了你的汤和咖啡

Sorry to hear that. What's wrong?

很遗憾听到这事出什么事了

Ugh, I can't really talk about it.

我不能说

It's an A.A. Thing. It's a lady thing.

匿名互助会的秘密女人的秘密

It's an A.A. Lady thing.

匿名互助会女人的秘密

Got it.

知道了

Well, glad you made it home safe.

很高兴你平安回家了

I was a little worried.

我有些担心

Thanks.

谢谢

Night.

晚安

Night.

晚安

Oh, damn it.

该死

Adam, I lied.

亚当我撒谎了

I wasn't with Wendy.

我没和温蒂在一起

I was with a guy.

而是和一个男人

A guy?

一个男人

A guy who isn't your brother.

那男人不是你弟弟

Yeah, I've been seeing Patrick,

我在和帕特里克交往

but I've also been doing this other thing, and...

但我脚踏两条船了

...I guess I'm kind of embarrassed.

我想我有些羞愧

Okay.

好吧

Well, um, not proud of it, but...

我不为你骄傲但是

there's a part of me that's...

我内心深处

kind of laughing at my brother right now.

现在在嘲笑我弟弟

Tempted to call him up and rub his nose in it.

很想打电话吵醒他揭他的伤疤

You can't.

不行

I won't. I-I won't.

我不会的

Good, 'cause I really like him.

很好因为我真的很喜欢他

I made a mess, didn't I?

我搞砸了对吧

Like a dog after he ate a can of chili.

就像是吃了一罐辣椒的狗狗

My dog did that once.

我的狗就吃过

We had to burn the carpet...

我们得烧掉地毯

I hope you don't think less of me.

希望你不会看不起我

Christy, your life is your life, but I got to tell you,

克丽丝蒂你的生活我管不着但我得告诉你

all this lying and sneaking around,

你这样撒谎偷偷摸摸的

it doesn't sound like you.

不像是你

Sounds more like your mom.

更像你妈妈

Oh, my God, that's the worst thing you could say.

天啊这是你说的最可怕的话

I'm sorry. I just mean you're better than she is.

抱歉我只是说你比她要好

She knows. I told her.

她知道我跟她说过

So...

那么

who is this guy who's not my brother?

这个不是我弟弟的男人是谁

Just someone from school.

学校的同学

It was supposed to be casual.

本该只是炮友的

My attempt at being a dude.

我打算当个渣男

But then he went and screwed it up by having feelings for me.

然后他搞砸了这一切因为他对我有了感情

Hold on. Did you set up the ground rules?

等等你定了基本规则吗

No, I just assumed we were on the same page.

没有我就以为我们想法一致

Ooh, rookie mistake.

低级错误

Listen, if you're gonna act like a dude,

如果你要表现得像是个渣男

you got to set up the rules.

你就得定规则

You got to say things like "I'm not looking for a relationship,

你得说这种话我不想谈恋爱

"I'm not built for a relationship,

我不适合谈恋爱

I'm not a relationship kind of guy," That type of nonsense.

我不是谈恋爱的那种人那种鬼话

Oh, you're right.

你说得对

Guys do say that.

男人的确这么说

Guess I never really heard it because at that point

我想我从来都没听到过因为那时候

I'm always thinking, "I can change you,

我总是在想我可以改变你

I can change you, I can change you."

我可以改变你我可以改变你

When will women learn they can't change men?

女人什么时候才会学到她们无法改变男人

Says the man who put a ring on my mom's finger

说这话的人给我妈妈戴上了戒指

and now listens to Adele.

现在都听阿黛尔的歌了

Son of a bitch.

王八蛋

Okay, how does this sound?

好吧这怎么样

"Dear Cooper..."

亲爱的库珀

Bad.

不好

It's a text, not a letter from camp.

就是条短信不是军营里写的信

Don't send anything.

什么都没发

But I need him to forgive me.

但我需要他原谅我

How many times have you apologized?

你道歉了多少次

Four...

四次

teen.

十四次

Did you try an Edible Arrangement?

你试过送水果吗

She's apologizing for an "Edible arrangement."

她在为"睡过"而道歉

I am wasted on all of you.

你们真是浪费了老娘的段子

It's horrible.

太可怕了

I can't eat, can't sleep.

我没法吃东西睡不着

This is what I was worried about.

这就是我担心的

You developed feelings.

你产生了感情

Oh, I get it.

我懂了

"Edible."

睡过啊

Cooper developed the stupid feelings.

是库珀产生了愚蠢的感情

I was the dude.

我是渣男啊

If you were really the dude, you wouldn't care.

如果你真是渣男你就不会在乎

You would ride off on your motorcycle

你会开着摩托车

and go shoot pool, maybe a bear.

去打台球也许去射杀熊

I'm not even listening to her anymore.

我拒绝听她说话

Honey, you're just gonna have to live with the fact

亲爱的你得接受这一事实

that there's somebody out there who doesn't like you.

有人不喜欢你

"Doesn't like you"? He hates her guts.

不喜欢你他恨死她了

And FYI, he's not alone.

顺便说一句不止他一个

I'm just saying

我只是说

that it's not fair for you to continue hurting him

你继续伤害他只为了让自己心里好受

just to make yourself feel better.

这样不公平

She's so wise.

她真明智

And yet she thought a purple velour tracksuit

但她觉得紫色丝绒运动服

was a good idea.

是个好主意

Fine.

好吧

I'll leave Cooper alone.

我不烦库珀了

Good.

很好

Now, who else hates me?

还有谁恨我啊

Greg at the Thursday night meeting.

周四晚互助会的格雷格

Who's Greg?

格雷格是谁

The guy you always call Scott.

你总是叫他斯考特

Oh, my God, Scott hates me?

天啊斯考特恨我吗

Oh, God, when do you graduate?

天啊你什么时候毕业啊

Look, I know I already said I was sorry,

我知道我已经道歉了

but I just need you to know that I'm really, really sorry.

但我只是想告诉你我真的很抱歉

I just don't get it, Christy.

我只是不懂克丽丝蒂

I mean, it would be one thing if there was another guy.

如果有第三者那就是另一回事了

Ooh, there is!

有的

There's totally another guy.

绝对有第三者

Does that help?

那有所慰藉吗

Not as much as I hoped.

没我希望的多

What I mean is if I was able to actually see him,

我的意思是如果我能见到他

I wouldn't have needed you.

我就不会需要你了

Oops, that came out a little harsh.

哎呀说出来有些无情

Everything you say comes out a little harsh.

你说的每句话都有些无情

I just mean that it's a long-distance thing,

我的意思是我们是异地恋

and I was frustrated because it was so complicated

我很沮丧因为那很复杂

and you were so easy.

而你又那么容易搞定

Your apology is making me want to kill myself.

你的道歉让我想自杀

That's not what I want.

我不想那样

Okay, then what do you want?

那你想怎么样

I guess I want to be with the other guy.

我大概想和另一个人在一起

Then go.

那就去吧

"Okay. Well, perhaps you will take comfort

好吧也许你会觉得这话慰藉

"In the fact that I will die long before you.

我会比你先死

Au revoir."

再见

Marjorie said moderation is key,

玛乔丽说适度是关键

so I'm just gonna have one cup of coffee a day.

所以我每天就喝一杯咖啡

I can live with that.

我能忍受

You must have been a fun drunk.

你肯定是个搞笑的酒鬼

I had a small but fervent cult following.

我有几个忠心的狂热信徒追随

Wow. Christy's driving down to Santa Cruz to see Patrick.

克丽丝蒂开车去圣克鲁兹见帕特里克了

She said she's either gonna make it work or get her heart broken.

她说要么修复感情要么心碎

I can't believe she's that crazy about my brother.

难以置信她这么爱我弟弟

He's kind of a tool.

他可是个傻子

We are so lucky to have each other.

我们能拥有彼此真是太幸运了

Yeah, we are. And, hey, you don't ever

是啊你永远不用

have to worry about me cheating on you.

担心我出轨

I wasn't, but go on.

我没担心但你继续说

I mean, juggling girlfriends,

同时谈几个女友

trying to remember which lie you told who, sneaking around.

努力记住你跟谁撒过什么谎偷偷摸摸

Being with you is so much less trouble.

跟你在一起麻烦少多了

Look at you, writing your vows already.

瞧瞧你已经在写婚誓了

No, no, you know what I meant.

不你明白我的意思

I do. And you know if you ever did cheat on me,

是的你知道如果你敢出轨

I would take the wheels off your chair

我就把你轮椅的轮子卸下来

and leave you in the woods.

把你丢在森林里

I do.

我知道

It's just kind of wonderful that Christy is racing down the highway

克丽丝蒂在路上疾驰风吹拂着她的头发

wind in her hair, all in the name of love.

这一切都是为了爱这真是太棒了

*I'm so excited*

*我十分激动*

*And I just can't hide it*

*无法掩饰*

*And I know, I know, I know, I know I know I want you, want you*

*我知道我想要你想要你*

未完待续

极品老妈 第五季 Mom Season 5 第10集: 熊与膀胱炎 A Bear and a Bladder Infection

台词

极品老妈第五季 Mom Season 5 第10集: 熊与膀胱炎 A Bear and a Bladder Infection