爱你，西蒙双语台词对白剧本

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翻译 Eunice 克里斯宁折不弯·学术男优

翻译辰星晓Reginamoon 吃冰棒

翻译青椒成功过完了六一苏葵

时间轴想念Gallifrey的Wholock 今

时间轴壬虚浪影 Avis Caroline

校对克里斯 Eunice

后期吉吉

BGM: The Oogum Boogum Song - Brenton Wood

总监 Somehacker 克里斯

I'm just like you.

我跟你一样

For the most part, my life is totally normal.

总体来说我的人生很平常

- Happy birthday. - No!

-生日快乐 -不是吧

My dad was the annoyingly handsome quarterback

我爸是帅气逼人的四分卫

who married the hot valedictorian.

他娶了性感的毕业生代表

And, no, they didn't peak in high school.

高中还不是他们的人生巅峰

I have a sister I actually like.

我有个我挺喜欢的妹妹

Not that I'd ever tell her that.

但我不会告诉她

And last year,

去年

and 200 episodes of Chopped ago...

在看完两百集《厨艺大战》前

she decided she wanted to be a chef.

她决定要当厨师

Which means we're pretty much all her test subjects now.

于是我们都成为了她的实验对象

Is it spicy, Jack?

很辣吗杰克

Gracious. Oh, my gosh.

天啊妈呀

And then there's my friends.

然后是我们的朋友们

Two of them, I've known since pretty much the beginning of time.

其中两个我从盘古开天辟地开始就认识了

- Or at least kindergarten. - No. No.

-或是至少从幼儿园开始 -不不

- Oh! Sorry! - Okay. How 'bout that?

-对不起 -看招

One of them, I just met a few months ago,

还有一个我只认识了几个月

but it feels like I've known her forever.

不过我感觉已经认识她一辈子了

We do everything friends do.

我们做朋友会一起做的事

We drink way too much iced coffee,

喝超多冰咖啡

watch bad '90s movies and hang out at Waffle House

看九零年代的烂片在松饼屋消磨时间

dreaming of college and gorging on carbs.

一边梦想大学时光一边狂吃

离毕业还有208天

So, like I said.

就像我说的

I'm just like you.

我跟你一样

I have a totally, perfectly normal life.

我的人生再平常不过

Except I have one huge-ass secret.

除了我有一个大秘密

Hey! Morning!

早上好

- Hey! - Sorry.

-好啊 -抱歉

I didn't realize you were masturbating.

我不知道你在打飞机

Yeah, very funny.

真幽默

Your sister's downstairs making some

你妹妹在楼下

la-di-da pancake thing she saw on Top Chef,

做从《顶级大厨》学来的花哨薄煎饼

so we should probably go eat that.

我们最好捧场去吃一下

Great. I'll be down in just a second.

很好我马上就下去

Okay. Right after you finish searching the internet for...

好的等你在网上搜完...

lingerie photos of Gigi Habib?

名模吉吉·哈逼波的内衣照

It's Hadid.

是哈迪德

Right. I didn't realize she was your girlfriend.

对哦我都不知道她是你女朋友

All right, finish up here.

好了快弄完

You got me.

算你厉害

- Morning, guys. - Simon, have a seat, honey.

-大家早 -西蒙快坐下

- Morning, Simon. - You gotta eat your breakfast.

-早安西蒙 -你得吃早餐

Please don't tell me

拜托你别说

that breakfast is the most important meal of the day

早餐是一天中最重要的一餐

because that is just so cliche. You're better than that.

实在太老套了你可没这么俗

I was gonna say breakfast lowers LDL cholesterol

我是要说早餐可以降低胆固醇

and prevents fluctuating glucose levels

避免血糖水平波动

that lead to type two diabetes.

预防2型糖尿病

Touche.

说得好

Nora. These are incredible.

诺拉这些太好吃了

Cornmeal pancakes with blackberry compote.

玉米粉博煎饼配黑莓蜜饯

But they're not crumbly enough.

但还不够松脆

Stop it. They're perfect.

别这样已经很完美了

Eat up, Bieber.

吃掉比伯

- See you, guys. - See you, Simon.

-再见了 -再见西蒙

Hey, honey. Be back by seven! It's TV night.

儿子七点前回来今晚一起看电视

Morning!

早上好

It's Simon! I live right here!

我是西蒙我住在这

I like your boots!

我喜欢你的靴子

Okay, bye!

再见

God damn.

该死

爱你西蒙

BGM: Rollercoaster - Bleachers

Had the craziest dream last night.

我昨晚做了个超疯狂的梦

Hey, Nick, you have the craziest dream every night.

尼克你每晚都做超疯狂的梦

You don't understand. I'm in this cave, right?

你不懂我在一个山洞里

Or maybe it's in outer space.

也可能是在外太空

David Beckham is there with these two contact lenses

大卫·贝克汉姆也在他拿着两副隐形眼镜

and then like, blue one or red one,

问我要蓝色的还是红色的

like he's a sexy Morpheus from Matrix.

仿佛他是《黑客帝国》里的性感睡神

And I don't know which one to pick.

我不知道该选哪副

I don't know what to do with these things.

我不知道要拿来干嘛

Oh, my God. Have you guys seen Creek Secrets today?

天啊你们今天看溪木镇树洞了吗

First of all, you are obsessed with that blog, so...

首先你太沉迷那个博客了

Okay, but apparently, Becca Peterson

好吧不过据说贝卡·彼得森

got caught giving Ryan O'Donovan an HJ in the pool.

被撞见在泳池帮瑞恩·奥多诺万撸管

That's the real reason they drained it.

这才是他们把池水排掉的真正原因

Man, our janitor needs a raise.

学校的清洁工需要涨工资

- Oh, my God. - And an HPV vaccine.

-我的天啊 -还需要打宫颈癌疫苗

Leah, I have this dream, right?

莉亚我做了个梦

Nick, we have a rule, remember?

尼克我不是说好了吗

No analyzing dreams before coffee.

喝了咖啡才准你分析梦境

Hi, could we get four iced coffees, please?

你好四杯冰咖啡谢谢

Oh, could you get Abby's with milk? She likes milk.

艾比那杯要加奶她喜欢牛奶

- One with milk. - What are you, her barista?

-一杯加奶 -怎么你是她的咖啡师吗

It's not hard to remember "with milk."

"加奶"又不难记住

Thank you.

谢谢

Oh, thank you. I am figuratively dying.

谢谢你我快死了

So, Abby, last night I dreamt

艾比我昨晚梦见

I put the wrong contacts in my eyes.

我放错隐形眼镜到眼睛里了

Another dream. You're like...

又做梦了你...

You're like the love child of Sigmund Freud and Cristiano Ronaldo.

你简直是弗洛伊德和球星C罗的私生子

- Oh, my God. - Thanks.

-天啊 -谢谢夸奖

Now, look. I can't see anything

在梦里我什么都看不见

and I'm stumbling around in this cave,

在山洞里跌跌撞撞

crashing into stuff, and then, I wake up.

撞到东西上然后我就醒了

- That's it? - Yeah.

-就这样 -嗯

Maybe it's something that you're not seeing clearly.

也许是因为现实中有些事你看不清

Like something that's, like, right in front of your face.

比如就在你面前的事

What am I not seeing?

我看不清什么

No idea.

不知道

BGM: Love Me - The 1975

We should be hot Pokemon for Halloween.

我们万圣节应该扮成性感的宠物小精灵

- Oh, yeah. - But I get to be slutty Charmander.

-对哦 -但我要扮骚版小火龙

Cool scarf, Ethan.

围巾不错伊森

Hope it doesn't get caught in your vagina.

希望别卡到你的阴道里

Great choice on the cargo pants, by the way.

对了你的工装裤选得很好

It looks like you got gangbanged by a T.J. Maxx.

看起来就像你被打折商场轮奸了

Whatever, fag.

随便了死基佬

Honestly, it's just not even a challenge anymore.

老实说已经变得毫无挑战性了

Dicks.

一群混蛋

Wish Ethan wouldn't make it so easy for them.

伊森不应该轻易放过他们

Yeah, well, at my old school,

是啊在我以前的学校

that would have been settled with a knife fight.

这种事会动刀子来解决

Good morning, Creekwood High!

早上好溪木镇高中

Come on, phones off!

快关掉手机

There's a whole world to look at!

有广阔世界等你们去看呢

You can look people in the eyes!

你们可以看着别人的眼睛

Yeah.

好了

Stop with the selfies. You're not all that.

别再自拍了你没多帅

- I'll see you guys at lunch. - Yeah.

-午餐见 -好

Simonay.

西蒙

Look at those new kicks, my brother.

瞧你的新球鞋兄弟

Where'd you get those? Where could I get a pair of those?

你在哪买的我去哪能买到

- I forget. Sorry. - You forget?

-我忘了抱歉 -你忘了

Come on, you gotta let me know the brand!

快点你得告诉我牌子

I want to be sneaker brothers.

我想跟你穿兄弟鞋

Oh, I see more phones! Who took your phones now?

我又看到更多手机谁没收了你们的手机

Me! Me! Me took your phones now! You can get 'em at my office!

我是我没收了你们手机到我办公室取回

I can't believe we have to be off book, in like, two weeks.

真不敢相信我们两周后要脱稿演出

Seriously, Sally Bowles never shuts the eff up.

说真的莎莉·鲍尔斯总逼逼个不停

Don't you wish you were talentless like me?

难道你不希望自己像我一样平庸吗

Here. Let me show you a thing or two.

来哥教你几招

Because then you could just be living the easy life

因为那样你就可以过得很轻松

as company member number eight.

当公司的无名小职员

Well, well, well...

哎哟哟

If it isn't my fellow thespians.

这不是我的同剧演员吗

Hey, Martin.

你好马丁

Hey, Spier. Hey, Abby.

好啊斯皮尔你好艾比

Hi.

你好

Excited to rehearse with you later.

很期待我们等会一起排练

Hey, uh, so, fun fact.

有个趣事

You know that Cabaret was actually based off

你知道《歌厅》其实改编自

a play called I Am Camera?

戏剧《我是摄影机》吗

Then I Am a Camera was based off

而《我是摄影机》改编自

this novel called Goodbye to Berlin.

一本叫《别了柏林》的小说

And Goodbye to Berlin was actually based off

《别了柏林》又改编自

Christopher Isherwood's early years in Berlin.

作者克里斯多福·伊舍伍早年在柏林的生活

That's awesome. I have homeroom.

好棒我要去教室了

Yeah. All right.

好吧

Well, I think she found that interesting.

我想她觉得那很有意思

Bye, Martin.

再见马丁

Bye, big boy.

再见大个子

Suraj! Now.

苏拉杰现在

Come on. You know the drill.

来吧你知道该怎么做

I've had an inspiration. How about The Affair?

我有个好主意看《情事》怎么样

No. No. We cannot watch The Affair as a family.

不行我们不能全家一起看《情事》

- Why not? - Because it's all about sex.

-为什么 -因为里面超多性爱镜头

Oh, well, God forbid we should watch people make love.

是啊上帝禁止我们看别人做爱

Oh, God.

老天

Oh, my God. You guys are so repressed.

天啊你们真压抑

Don't therapize us, okay? We are not your patients.

别给我们做心理治疗我们不是你的病人

- We're your family. - That's true.

-我们是你的家人 -没错

If you were my patients, you'd be much more well-adjusted.

如果你是我的病人你人缘会更好

- Oh. Nice therapy burn, baby. - Thank you.

-损得漂亮宝贝 -谢谢

- She got you. - You know what?

-她说中了 -对了

We didn't see last week's episode of The Bachelor.

我们没看上周那集真人秀《单身汉》

Yeah, how did that guy even become the bachelor?

对那家伙怎么会变成单身汉

Why?

为什么这么说

Well, he's clearly gay.

他很明显是基佬

- No, he's not. - Really?

-他才不是 -真的吗

- He's handsome. - That date,

-他那么帅 -那次约会

where he took the girl to the "Make your own perfume" place?

他带女生去调配专属香水的地方

Dad!

爸爸

- The producers plan those dates. - He is so fruity.

-约会都是制作人安排的 -他那么娘

He's so fruity.

他超娘的

He's a one-man pride parade. Are you kidding me?

他自己就是一出同志游行别开玩笑了

- He has more chemistry - Just stop it.

-他和男主持人的火花 -别说了

with Chris Harrison, than any of those girls.

比和其他女生还多

After this, I gotta show you something.

这里结束后我有东西要给你看

Okay? Let's watch The Americans.

好吗我们看《美国谍梦》

Every single episode, you here next to me.

每一集我们都一起看的

So your mother decided that we should make

你妈决定我们今年自己制作

each other anniversary presents this year.

给对方的结婚周年礼物

You know, so they came from the heart, or some crap.

这样礼物是发自内心的之类的屁话

Anyway, I decided to come up with this bad boy.

总之我决定做出这个礼物

Look at this.

你看

I present to you, a Jack Spier production.

为您呈现杰克·斯皮尔的作品

艾米丽和杰克20周年纪念日

Wait, wait.

等一下

Look at that!

你看

Oh, it's so good.

太棒了

Look at this. Wait, wait, wait.

看这个等等等等

Yup. Okay.

对好的

What are you...

你干什...

Look, this is your 20th anniversary,

听着这是你们20周年纪念日

so I'm gonna be super real with you right now.

所以我要对你说实话

This looks like a fourth grader made it.

这看起来像是四年级小学生做的

And not even the smartest fourth grader in the class.

还不是全班最聪明的四年级生

Just, like, a deeply average fourth grader.

只是个普通水平的四年级生

What are you talking about? This is amazing.

你在说什么这棒极了

I got fade-ins. I got dissolves.

我有淡入淡出效果

- This is beautiful. - Get up for a second.

-多好看啊 -起来一下

I'll help you. Trust me.

我帮你弄相信我

We can make this good. We just gotta put in...

我们能做得很好只需加入...

you know, some home video.

一些家庭录像

Maybe put in some better music.

或者加入些更好的音乐

"Better music"? This was huge when we were young.

"更好的音乐" 这首歌在我们年轻时可火了

Yeah. So was Bill Cosby.

演员比尔·科斯比当年也很火

BGM: Waterloo Sunset - The Kinks

Have you seen the new post?

你看到最新八卦了吗

No. What? Oh, my God.

没有是什么天啊

You know, I'm never getting back in that pool again.

我再也不会进那个游泳池了

Wait, no. About the closeted gay kid at school.

不是关于学校那个深柜学生

What?

什么

Yeah, it's on Creek Secrets.

在"溪木镇树洞"上

Who do you think it is?

你觉得是谁

I bet it's that sophomore

我猜一定是

with the rimless glasses. I get a vibe.

戴无框眼镜那个高二生我有预感

Actually.

其实

Maybe it's Parker O'Malley.

说不定是帕克·奥马利

I've heard he's, like, obsessed with Les Mis.

我听说他超迷《悲惨世界》

Oh, gosh. Jeez. I gotta go.

天啊我得挂了

Bieber just took a dump on the floor.

比伯刚拉屎在地上了

Aw, Beebs.

小比

- Feed him some rice... - Can I call you back?

-喂它吃点米饭... -我等会打给你

"Sometimes, I feel like I'm stuck on a Ferris wheel.

"有时我觉得自己被困在摩天轮上

One minute I'm on top of the world,

前一分钟我还在世界之巅

and the next, I'm at rock bottom.

下一分钟我就跌入谷底

Over and over, all day long.

反反复复整天如此

Because a lot of my life is great,

因为大部分时候我的生活都很美好

but nobody knows I'm gay.

但没人知道我是同性恋

Blue."

小蓝"

回复邮件

选择用户名

透过我的窗口1@gmail.com[出自歌词]

主题你好

Blue. Okay.

小蓝好的

Dear Blue, I'm just like you.

亲爱的小蓝我跟你一样

For the most part, my life is totally normal.

总体来说我的人生很平常

My dad was the annoyingly handsome quarterback

我爸是帅气逼人的四分卫

who married the hot valedictorian.

他娶了性感的毕业生代表

And no, they didn't peak in high school.

高中还不是他们的人生巅峰

I have a sister I actually like.

我有个我挺喜欢的妹妹

Not that I'd ever tell her that.

但我不会告诉她

And then, there's my friends.

然后是我们的朋友们

We do everything friends do. We drink way too much...

我们做朋友会一起做的事喝超多...

So, like I said, I'm just like you.

就像我说的我跟你一样

I have a totally, perfectly normal life.

我的人生再平常不过

Except I have one huge-ass secret.

除了我有一个大秘密

Jacques.

雅克

发送

Hey. Morning.

早上好

欢迎你使用谷歌邮箱

Nothin'.

没回信

Math is what we're talking about.

我们在讨论的是数学

Can anyone answer for me how we find the value

有谁能回答如何得出黑板上

of "D-y by d-x" that I have written up on the board?

Dy除以Dx的值是多少

Does anyone want to... Yes! Simon.

有谁想... 好的西蒙

Can I go to the bathroom?

我能去洗手间吗

Sure, it's fine.

可以去吧

Thanks.

谢谢

没有新邮件

无法连接到邮箱

Simon. Simon.

西蒙西蒙

- Yeah. - Can I get some fries?

-是 -我能吃你的薯条吗

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

可以拿吧

I'm telling you, the Oakwood Tigers score so many goals

告诉你们奥克伍德猛虎队能进那么多球

because they shave their legs.

是因为他们有刮腿毛

Garrett, I'm not gonna shave my legs.

盖瑞特我是不会刮腿毛的

It makes their kicks more aerodynamic.

这能让他们踢球时阻力更小

We can just do extra burpees, man.

我们多做些立卧撑就行了

Whatever, Bram.

随便吧布拉姆

Guys, I just found a press-on nail in my salad.

我刚在我沙拉里发现一个美甲贴片

Debbie.

黛比

Why is there no cell reception at this school?

学校里怎么没有信号

I swear to God.

气死人

Simonay, Simonay.

西蒙呀西蒙

What are you doing? You can't text in the halls.

你在干什么走廊里禁止发短信

How many times have I told you that?

我说过多少次了

I can't have all my students tindering it up.

不能让学生们忙着上约炮软件

That's my department.

那是我的领域

Right.

对

It actually is.

还真的是呢

I got a really hot date on Tinder tonight.

我今晚要跟软件上认识的美女约会

She is cute!

她很可爱

"Ew! Vice principals can't go on dates. That's gross."

"副校长怎么能去约会好恶心"

We're people too, Simon.

我们也是普通人西蒙

We like to go out. We like to have a good time.

我们喜欢外出喜欢享乐

We like to have sex. That's not a big deal, right?

喜欢滚床单这没什么大不了

Yeah, no. No biggie at all.

是的没什么

Actually. You know, I totally see you as a person.

事实上我完全把你当普通人看待

- Thank you. I appreciate that. - Yeah.

-谢谢我很感激 -嗯

- Thank you very much. - You're welcome.

-非常感谢 -不客气

- Seriously. - Yeah. Yeah.

-真的 -嗯好

Could I just get my phone though?

但能把电话还给我吗

No. Unfortunately, I'm gonna have to keep it

不行先由我保管

until after play practice.

直到排练完音乐剧

But you will get your precious

但排练结束后

after play practice, okay? I promise.

就把你的宝贝还给你我保证

So how's play practice going?

音乐剧排练得怎么样了

- Great. Yeah, it's... - How's Ms. Albright?

-很好挺... -奥布莱特老师怎么样

She's good.

她挺好的

She's good? She doesn't like men.

她挺好她都不喜欢男人

Okay.

好吧

Those aren't actual claps. My hands are tired!

那不是真正的鼓掌我的手都累了

Okay! All right.

好吧

That was...

刚才的表现...

Cal, help me. That was...

卡尔帮帮我刚才...

That was a start?

刚才是个好开始

That was a start! Is what it was.

刚才是个好开始就是这样

That was a start.

是个好开始

You know, when Mr. Worth told me that no student,

沃斯老师告诉我所有学生

regardless of talent...

不管有没有天分

...was to be left out of my production, I had my doubts.

都得参演我的剧时我有过怀疑

Yes, I did.

是真的

Yeah.

是的

That's it. That's my whole speech.

就这样我说完了

Ms. Albright.

奥布莱特老师

Hi. That was the biggest train wreck

你好刚才那是我们舞台有史以来

our stage has ever seen.

最车祸的表演

And Rob and Brianne

而且罗伯和布里安娜

were practically dry humping the whole song.

整首歌都在干蹭

Oh, I saw.

我看到了

Save the kissing for the cast party. All right?

到庆功派对时再亲好吗

This is war. You're Nazis. Okay? More anger.

这是战争你们是纳粹再愤怒一点

Suraj, stop pretending that trumpet is your penis!

苏拉杰别再把小号当成你鸡鸡抚弄了

My boy.

好样的

It is a rental.

那是租来的

I was an extra in The Lion King,

我在《狮子王》当过临演

and this is where I am.

现在竟然沦落至此

Hey. What time is it?

现在几点

Ten minutes since the last time you asked. Go.

你十分钟前才问过走开

One! Two! Three! Four!

一二三四

I will kill you.

我要宰了你

- Mr. Worth. - Hey, what's up, my brother?

-沃斯老师 -还好吗老弟

Hey, just here for my phone.

我来取回我的手机

Oh, of course you are. Of course you are.

当然了当然了

How'd you enjoy being unplugged?

没手机的感觉如何

It was great.

非常棒

- Great, right? - Yeah.

-很棒对吧 -是的

This isn't life, man. This is plugged.

这不是生活这是沉迷手机

This is unplugged.

这是远离手机

Plugged. Unplugged.

沉迷远离

All right, Simon, I know that I'm hard on you. I really do.

西蒙我知道我对你很严厉确实如此

But it's only 'cause I really see myself in you.

但这都是因为我在你身上看到我的影子

Uh... You know, I don't know if I'd say that.

这我不太确定

No, I see it, it's obvious. It's obvious.

不我能看到非常明显

- I know there's a lot going on there, man. - Yup.

-我知道你有很多烦恼 -嗯

And I bet you got a lot of questions.

你一定有很多疑问

Is there something you wanna say to me?

你有什么想对我说的吗

- No. - You know my policy. What does it say?

-没有 -你知道我的政策是什么

- "Open door. Open ears." - "Open door. Open ears."

-"打开大门打开耳朵" -"打开大门打开耳朵"

There's nothing you want to say?

你没什么要说的吗

- Nope. - You sure?

-没有 -你确定吗

- Yeah. - Okay.

-确定 -好吧

- It's a great sign though. - Thank you.

-但这牌子很棒 -谢谢

Thank you. Now don't text and drive.

谢谢你开车时不要发短信

That's how my cat got murdered.

我的猫就是这样被撞死的

Okay.

好的

I'm just kidding. I don't have cats. I got asthma.

逗你的啦我没养猫我有哮喘

收到"蓝绿118"来信

A secret, huh?

秘密是吗

Is it the same as my secret?

跟我的秘密一样吗

If it is, when did you know?

如果是的话你何时知道的

Have you told anyone? Blue.

你告诉过别人吗小蓝

Okay.

行了

No, Blue. I haven't told anyone.

不小蓝我没告诉过任何人

And, honestly, I can't even really explain why.

老实说我也无法解释为什么

女孩想要基本享乐权利

女性权利也是人权

Deep down, I know my family would be fine with it.

我内心深处知道我家人不会介意

Hey, what rhymes with "Patriarchy"?

什么词跟"男权社会"押韵

打倒男权涩会

That says "Patriachy" though.

但上面写的是"男权涩会"

Oh, shit.

该死

My mom's about as liberal as they come.

我妈非常开明

And my dad isn't exactly the macho type.

我爸也不是大男子主义的人

I mean, Creekwood's resident out-gay kid

在溪木镇出柜的同性恋

seems to be doing just fine.

好像也过得挺好

When Ethan came out, no one even cared.

伊森出柜时根本没人在意

Guys, I have something to tell you.

我有件事要告诉你们

I'm gay.

我是同性恋

Wow, really? That's really great, Ethan.

真的吗太棒了伊森

Oh, my God. No way.

天啊不可能

Oh, my God, you are? I had no idea.

你居然是同志我完全没看出来

What a complete surprise!

实在太意外了

Too much, Claire.

太过了克莱尔

As for how I knew I was gay,

至于我如何得知自己是同性恋

it was a bunch of little things.

都是从许多小事中发现的

Like this one recurring dream

比如我反复做的

I kept having about Daniel Radcliffe.

关于丹尼尔·拉德克利夫的梦

And then proceeded to have every night for a month.

之后发展到有一个月每晚都做这个梦

I was obsessed with Panic! At the Disco.

我疯狂迷恋"Panic! At the Disco"乐队

I can't. He's so cute. He's so cute.

我受不了了他好帅太帅了

Come on, he's like Jesus and chocolate.

拜托他就像耶稣和巧克力一样

Just look at him.

你看他

Then I realized it really wasn't about the music.

后来意识到根本与他们的音乐无关

And then there was my first girlfriend.

之后我交了第一个女友

I think I'm falling in love with you.

我想我爱上你了

Wow. Thank you. Be right back.

谢谢你我去去就回

Wasn't my proudest moment.

那不是我最自豪的时刻

快来接我大家都在喝酒

妈妈天啊我这就赶来

How 'bout you? How did you know?

你呢你怎么知道的

Warmly, Jacques.

热情的雅克

Fondly, Jacques.

真诚的雅克

Jacques.

雅克

Jacques, don't worry.

雅克别担心

If your proudest moment happened in middle school,

如果你最自豪的时刻发生在中学时期

that would be pretty sad.

那挺可悲的

For me, I realized I liked guys

而我是在看《权力的游戏》时

watching Game of Thrones.

发现自己喜欢男人

My friends were all holding their breath

我的朋友都屏住呼吸

waiting to see the Dragon Princess's boobs.

等着看龙妈的奶子

I was crushing hard on Jon Snow.

我却迷恋琼恩·雪诺

Well, I've never told anyone

我从没告诉过别人

about my Daniel Radcliffe phase so now we're even.

我暗恋过丹尼尔·拉德克利夫我们扯平了

And for the record,

而且我要说

I think Jon Snow is an excellent choice for your sexual awakening.

琼恩·雪诺是很棒的性觉醒对象

So I guess, if I want to find you at school

看来如果我想在学校里找到你

I just have to look for the Game of Thrones fanatic.

寻找《权力的游戏》狂热粉丝就行了

I was just listening to that M83 song "Reunion,"

我刚刚在听M83乐队的《重聚》

and it made me think of you.

这首歌让我想起你

You'll probably think my music taste is lame.

你可能会觉得我的音乐品味很差

Kind of have the same taste as my Aunt Sally

我跟喜欢音乐剧歌曲的莎莉姑妈

who loves show tunes.

品味很雷同

Obviously, some of the things I've told you about myself

显然我跟你说的一些关于我的事

are things I've never talked about with anyone.

我从没跟别人聊过

There's something about you that makes me want to open up.

你很特别让我想对你敞开心扉

And that's slightly terrifying for me.

那让我有点害怕

So I've been thinking,

所以我在考虑

maybe I should be Jon Snow for Halloween.

也许万圣节我该扮成琼恩·雪诺

What about you? Who are you gonna be?

你呢你准备扮成谁

I'm not dressing up.

我不打算变装

For me, Halloween's all about the Oreos

对我来说万圣节的意义

with the orange frosting in the middle.

就是橙子味夹心奥利奥

Wow. Look at that smile. You're glowing, man.

瞧瞧那笑容你容光焕发呢

No.

没有

You are glowing. You look happy.

你在发光看起来很开心

Oh, just regular.

普通啦

- Oh, yeah? - Yeah.

-是吗 -嗯

Me too. I'm a little meh.

我也是还好而已

Why "meh"?

为什么"还好"

Oh, I had my big Tinder date last night. Oh, God.

我昨晚跟约炮软件认识那妹子去约会老天

She was not into it.

她不感兴趣

At. All.

毫无性趣

- Oh, come on. Too soon. - No.

-不是吧太早了 -不

The bell is a buzzkill.

这铃声真是扫兴

- See you, Mr. Worth. - All right.

-回见沃斯老师 -好吧

Well, thank you for your help, Fraulein.

谢谢你的帮忙小姐

You're welcome.

不客气

German accent for Cabaret. Yup. Take care, Ms. Bradley.

为《歌厅》练的德国口音保重布拉德利女士

Ladies.

女士们

Let's see what you got, interwebs.

看看有什么新鲜事互联网

Here are your burnt tots,

这是你的烤焦的马铃薯

because you have horrible taste.

因为你品味糟糕

Here's your green banana,

这是你的绿香蕉

because you like disgusting things.

因为你喜欢恶心的东西

Wow, you guys are weird.

你们真奇葩

Yup. They're practically Cantonese twins.

对他们就像广东双胞胎

- Siamese. - Yeah. Siamese.

-是暹罗 -对暹罗

Yeah, agree to disagree.

对求同存异吧

I don't think that's one of those things

我觉得这不是那种

where you can agree to disagree.

可以求同存异的事

It's just right.

这样就是对的

To each his own.

对个人来说

Oreos.

奥利奥

Man, I love those.

天啊我太爱了

Halloween ones are the best, right?

万圣节限量版是最棒的对吧

Yeah.

嗯

Er, so, guys, I have great news.

各位我有个好消息

My aunt's boyfriend just took off

我姨妈的男友开着她的车

with her car and all her jewelry.

拿着她的珠宝跑路了

Bram, that's terrible news!

布拉姆这太糟了

I know, but it's like,

我知道但是

the third time it's happened to her.

这差不多在她身上发生第三次了

She has really bad taste in men.

她对男人品味很差

Anyways, my mom is going down to Orlando to deal with it

总之我妈要去奥兰多处理这件事

which means I get to throw a Halloween party.

也就是说我能办场万圣节派对了

Awesome!

太棒了

Nice!

好

Thank you, Bram's dumb-ass aunt!

谢谢你布拉姆的蠢姨妈

All right, this is gonna be epic, you guys.

伙计们肯定会很棒的

I can bring my karaoke machine.

我可以带上我的K歌机

All right, hey, guys, Halloween party Friday night!

好了伙计们周五晚万圣节派对

Friday night, Halloween party, okay? Bram's house!

周五晚万圣节派对在布拉姆家

You really set this in motion, man.

你真搞起来了

I know, right?

对啊

- Hey, little guy. - Me?

-小家伙 -我

Halloween party. Friday night. Bram's house. Be there.

万圣节派对周五晚布拉姆家记得来

You're gonna freak him out, man.

你会把他吓坏的

I know. He's, like, nine years old.

我知道他看上去也就九岁

Very relieved that we're in agreement on Oreos.

我们都喜欢奥利奥真是让我松了口气

That would have been a deal-breaker for me.

不然我可能会因为这件事跟你闹掰

On a totally different, non-cookie related note...

但抛开饼干不谈

is it weird that I have no idea what you look like,

我完全不知道你长什么样子但却一直

but I can't stop thinking about kissing you.

忍不住想亲你还真是奇怪

Simon. Simon.

西蒙西蒙

Eyes on your own test.

眼睛别乱看

Don't stop on my account, Rob and Brianne.

别因为我停下罗伯和布里安娜

That's the most action I've seen in weeks.

这是我这几周见到的最精彩的动作场面了

What do we got here? Ah!

你们在做什么哇

When we're done, it's gonna look

等我们完成这看上去将像

like a real German sex club. Don't ask me how I know.

真正的德国性俱乐部别问我怎么知道的

Hey! Hey! The spray paint is for painting,

喷漆是用来作画的

not for huffing.

不是用来闻的

You don't want to get good at that.

你不会想擅长那个的

Okay, do you guys think I should dye my hair grey

好了你们觉得我该把头发染灰

- to play Fraulein Schneider? - Sure.

-来演施耐德小姐吗 -当然

Really? But my hair is kind of like my thing.

真的但我的头发算是我的标志

I'm gonna go get a soda.

我去买个汽水

Do you want anything?

你需要带点什么吗

No.

不用

You disgust me.

你让我恶心

Simon!

西蒙

- Hey, Martin. - Buddy.

-马丁 -兄弟

Hey, um, I used the computer in the library right after you.

我之前在你后面用了图书馆的电脑

Okay.

好的

Well, I went to Gmail, and it pulled up your account.

我打开邮箱是你的账户

And I, uh, read some of your emails.

我看了一部分你的邮件

I know I probably shouldn't've,

我知道我不该看

but they were, like, right there.

但它们就在我眼前

So you'll be interested to know my brother's gay.

你会对我哥哥是同性恋感兴趣的

No. Martin, that wouldn't interest me to know.

不马丁我没兴趣知道

Okay. Don't worry. I won't show anyone.

好吧别担心我不会给别人看的

Show anyone what?

给别人看什么

Did you print my emails or something?

你把我的邮件打印出来了吗

Oh, no, no.

不没有

I screenshot them.

我截图了

- You screenshotted my emails? - Mm-hmm. Yeah.

-你截图了我的邮件 -对

Let me talk to you for a second.

我来跟你谈谈

- Oh, Ms. Bradley. - Hello, Martin.

-布拉德利女士 -你好马丁

- Did you feather your hair? - No.

-你打薄头发了吗 -没

Looking good.

看上去不错

This is a good section.

这排书不错

Jeez.

天啊

Now, why the hell did you screenshot my emails?

你为什么要截图我的电邮

Ah, well, you and Abby Susso are good friends. Right?

你和艾比·苏索是好朋友对吧

Yeah. We know each other.

对我们认识

What does that have to do with anything?

这跟其他事有什么关系

Well, I need you to help me talk with her...

我需要你帮我跟她搭话

and hang out with her and stuff, you know?

跟她一起玩之类的

Why would I help you do that?

我为什么要帮你

Are you blackmailing me?

你在威胁我吗

Oh, shh! Okay. Don't be so dramatic here, Simon.

别这么戏剧化西蒙

Sup, Tyler?

你好泰勒

What's up, Tyler? Is that a Patagonia?

你好啊泰勒是巴塔哥尼亚的外套吗

Nice. I just like her.

不错我只是喜欢她

And I think that you could help me.

我觉得你能帮我

Yeah, what if I say no, Martin?

是吗如果我拒绝呢马丁

I mean, what are you gonna do?

你打算怎么办

You gonna tell the whole school that I'm...

你打算告诉全学校我是...

You're gonna leak my emails?

你打算泄露我的邮件吗

You're gonna post 'em on CreekSecrets?

你打算发到溪木镇树洞上吗

I just think that we're in a position here,

我只是觉得以我们现在的状况

where we could help each other out is all.

可以互相提供帮助

So think about it.

考虑一下吧

Good talk.

聊得真愉快

You know, I never thought of a pepper

我以前从没把辣椒

as being a vegetable...

当成蔬菜

...but it makes perfect sense.

但完全说得通

I like the cilantro. A little Mexican flair, huh?

我喜欢香菜有点墨西哥菜的意思

Very creative, kiddo.

非常有创意孩子

You hate the peppers. Don't you?

你讨厌辣椒是吗

No. The peppers are great.

不辣椒很棒

I'm just gonna get some air.

我出去透透气

Jacques, I have to get something off my chest.

雅克有些话我必须得说

The other day, you asked me

那天你问我

what I was wearing for Halloween

万圣节打算穿什么

and I said I wasn't dressing up.

我说我不打算装扮

I lied. Truth is,

我撒谎了实话是

I didn't want you to know what I was wearing

我不想让你知道我穿什么

because I don't want you to know who I am.

因为我不想让你知道我是谁

Right now, these emails,

此时此刻这些邮件

they feel like this totally safe place.

就感觉像安全的避风港一样

I'm just not ready for my whole world to change.

我还没准备好颠覆自己的世界

I hope you understand.

希望你能理解

Yes, Blue. I understand.

好的小蓝我理解

Okay, if you want me to help you with Abby,

如果你想让我帮你撮合你和艾比

you cannot eat that.

你不能吃那个

So you're gonna help me?

这么说你打算帮我

Yeah.

对

Simon, that is fantastic news.

西蒙那太好了

I really think that Abby and I are meant to be together.

我真认为我和艾比是天生一对

Really? Do you?

真的吗

It's not all about looks, Simon.

外表并不决定一切西蒙

Okay. So you're banking on your great,

所以你在指望

blackmaily personality to get the job done?

用你那了不得的敲诈型人格搞定吗

- Where are we going? - Your place.

-我们要去哪 -你家

We're gonna see if you have anything

我们来看看你到底有没有

that doesn't scream, "Punch me."

什么东西让人不想给你一拳

Actually, I've got swim lessons.

事实上我有游泳课

Cancel it!

取消掉

Okay, I just have to call my mom first.

好吧但我得先给我妈打电话

She has to approve everybody that comes in the house.

领别人回家得先经过她同意

All right. Here we go.

好了快来

All right. And here we are.

好了我们到了

This is where the magic happens.

这里就是魔法发生的地方

Ooh. Correction.

纠正一下

This is where the magic happens.

这里才是魔术[魔法]发生的地方

I've been dabbling in close-up illusions.

我最近在尝试近距离幻觉魔术

Does Abby like magic?

艾比喜欢魔术吗

No. Martin, I don't think she does like magic.

不马丁我觉得她不喜欢魔术

But, um, there's a really thin line

但是和某人一起笑

between laughing with someone, and laughing at someone.

与嘲笑某人只是一线之间

And you are that line.

而你就是那条线

So, if you want Abby to like you,

如果你想让艾比喜欢你

what you have to do is you have to

你需要做的就是

make her see you as more of a...

让她看到你...

As sexy Martin!

性感的一面

Yeah! Yeah, I could be sexy.

对没错我能性感

You like dudes. Tell me.

你喜欢男人告诉我

What part of me do you find the hottest?

你觉得我哪部分最性感

- No. I'm not doing this. - No. Come on.

-不我不要 -快点

No, Martin. I don't want to answer that.

不马丁我不想回答

Look, if you said my shoulders

听着如果你说是我的肩膀

I would dress to accentuate. You know?

我就突出展示一下

You know what? Here's your first tip.

知道吗给你第一条建议

Ripped.

线条不错

Girls, they don't want to read your clothes.

女孩们不想读你衣服上的字

我才不鸟你

I think you're wrong about that one.

我觉得你错了

How many of these do you have?

你到底有多少这种衣服

Please, just stop! Hey! Stop!

停下快停下

Look, I don't want your help in changing me.

我不想让你帮忙改变我

I want your help in getting Abby to like me for me.

我想让你帮忙让艾比爱上本来的我

Look. Um...

听着

there's a party this Saturday. At Bram's.

这周六有个派对在布拉姆家

Do you want to go with my friends and I?

你想跟我和我朋友一起去吗

Yes!

想

Yes! So simple.

当然想太简单了

Must be why they call you Simple Simon.

一定是因为这样大家才叫你头脑"简单"西蒙

Nobody calls me that, Martin.

没人这么叫我马丁

Hey, uh, do you want to, like, sleep over?

你想留下过夜吗

Nope.

不想

Oh, hello.

你好

Hey, what's up?

你们好

- Nice, right? - Nick.

-不错吧 -尼克

Good?

不错吧

This is, like, a new level of laziness, even for you.

即便是你这也算懒出新高度了

What do you mean? I'm Cristiano Ronaldo.

什么意思我扮的C罗

And you couldn't even be bothered

你连把背上纸条的颜色涂满

to fill in the letters on the back?

都懒得弄吗

No, come on. Give me that.

不过来给我

You are a bully.

你真是恶霸

Hey. Don't talk about Yoko that way, man.

别这么跟洋子说话

Because if you do, you're out of the band.

如果你这样你就滚出乐团吧

Who are you guys supposed to be?

你们扮的是谁

John Lennon and Yoko Ono.

约翰·列侬和小野洋子

Oh! I thought she was the girl from The Ring,

我以为她是《午夜凶铃》里的那个女孩

and you were Jesus.

你是耶稣呢

Jesus? No. Why would Jesus be wearing a white suit?

耶稣不耶稣为什么穿白西装

I don't know. You tell me.

不知道你来告诉我啊

You're the one who decided to dress up like fancy Jesus.

是你打算把自己扮成精致耶稣的

Oh, my God. Okay. Come here.

天啊好了过来

- Turn around. - I'm here.

-转过身 -我在这呢

- Turn around. - Okay.

-转过去 -好了

- Okay. - Is it good?

-好了 -好看吗

- Way better. - Is it?

-强多了 -真的

Yeah. Now, we need to do something about this hair.

对现在我们得处理下这个鸡窝头了

Maybe slick it back?

梳到后面怎么样

It doesn't do that. It doesn't slick back.

不行它不往后倒

Wonder Woman in the hizzy!

神奇女侠驾到

I made up a catchphrase,

我编了个口号

'cause Wonder Woman doesn't have one.

因为神奇女侠自己没有

"Hizzy" Means house.

那个词的意思是房子

- Right. Yeah. - Yeah.

-对 -当然

Oh, Abby, you look amazing.

艾比你看上去棒极了

Thank you!

谢谢

Yeah. You look awesome.

你看上去棒极了

I'm gonna go make those frozen pizzas.

我去弄那些冷冻披萨

All right.

好

Yeah, I'll help.

我去帮忙

That's a nice costume, for real.

这行头真不错真的

Thank you. What? Cristiano Ronaldo!

谢谢你是... C罗

Do you remember when we went to school

你记得我们以前上学时

dressed as Charlie's Angels?

扮成霹雳娇娃吗

Oh, my God, yes.

天啊记得

And Nick's balls fell out of his booty shorts

然后尼克的蛋蛋从小短裤漏出来

when he, like, dropped down to do the gun pose?

就在我们蹲下做招牌动作的时候

Mm. Do you miss trick-or-treating?

你怀念去讨糖吃吗

What, you mean instead of, like, going to loud parties

你是说不喜欢现在参加热闹的派对

pretending to like the taste of beer

假装喜欢啤酒的味道

and feeling too self-conscious to dance?

感到太扭捏没办法跳舞吗

I don't know why you feel self-conscious.

我不知道你为什么感到扭捏

I mean, you are very clearly

你显然是

the coolest person at our school.

学校里最酷的人了

I'm pretty sure you're the only one who feels that way.

我很确定只有你这么觉得

But thank you.

但是谢了

Who's that?

那是谁

I invited Martin.

我邀请了马丁

- Martin Addison? - Why?

-马丁·艾迪森 -为什么

Is this a Make-A-Wish situation?

是要帮他完成愿望吗

No, he's cool.

不他挺好的

Oh, looking sharp.

看上去不错

- Guys. - What are you supposed to be?

-伙计们 -你扮的是谁

Isn't it obvious?

难道不是很明显吗

指受潜意识影响而出现的错误

Ah! I'm a Freudian slip.

我是弗洛伊德衬裙[错误]

Abby. Wonder Woman.

艾比神奇女侠

Just pick a song already.

快选一首歌

Hey, Nick, uh, can you not rush me?

尼克你能别催我吗

Honestly, I can't choose. There's so many.

老实说我选不了太多了

That's like Netflix.

就像网飞一样

You know, trying to pick a film on Netflix.

就像在网飞上选一部电影

I'm like... "Am I in an Apatow mood,

我就说 "我是想看贾德·阿帕图

两人均为好莱坞知名导演

or am I in a Billy Wilder mood?" You know?

还是比利·怀尔德

Ooh, play Drake. Yes.

放公鸭的歌

Uh, no. Drake is, like, super played out at this point.

不他的歌现在放超没劲

You can't play out a rap god. Doesn't happen.

说唱天王的歌怎么会没劲不可能

Impossible. First of all, he's not a rap god.

不可能首先他不是说唱天王

And second of all, I'm looking for some Beyoncé.

第二我在找碧昂斯的歌

I just can't find "Lemonade."

就是找不到《柠檬水》了

Hey. Here's an interesting question.

我有个有趣的问题

I love Beyoncé.

我喜欢碧昂斯

What makes you guys feel nostalgic?

什么东西会让你们怀旧

I mean, I think everybody kinda likes Beyoncé.

我觉得每个人或多或少都喜欢她

Grape soda makes me feel very nostalgic.

葡萄汽水会让我感觉很怀旧

- What are you talking about? - What makes you feel nostalgic?

-你在说什么 -什么东西会让你怀旧

Hey, Abby.

艾比

I bet you're gonna have the best costume tonight.

我敢说今晚你的行头最棒

- Thanks. - Nah, you're welcome.

-谢谢 -不客气

What the hell, Spier?

搞什么斯皮尔

Hey, why is Nick still flirting with Abby?

为什么尼克还在和艾比调情

I don't know, Martin.

我不知道马丁

Maybe you shouldn't have worn a dress.

也许你不该穿裙子来

You look like a drag queen

你看上去像个变装皇后

rolled around in magnetic poetry.

还围了一条磁体诗

Hey, Abby!

艾比

Whenever you need a refill of your drink,

你什么时候需要续杯

I'll be your designated bartender.

我就是你的专属酒保

So don't worry.

别担心

Okay. Hey, Chloe, come here!

克洛伊过来

Hey. John Lennon?

约翰·列侬

- Yeah. You got it. - Nice.

-对猜对了 -不赖

And, um, Nick...

尼克

- You're Nick. - No. No. I'm Ronaldo.

-你扮的自己 -不不我是C罗

- Oh. My bad. - Obviously.

-我的错 -很明显

Who are you supposed to be?

你扮的是谁

Oh. Uh... I am post-presidency Barack Obama.

我是总统任期结束的奥巴马

So I'm just chillin' in Hawaii, drinking Mai Tais,

在夏威夷度假喝鸡尾酒

writing memoirs

写回忆录

and hoping Trump doesn't destroy my legacy.

希望特朗普别把我的功绩毁于一旦

That's awesome.

太棒了

Thanks. Now let's go to the bar. Come on.

谢了我们去吧台吧快来

No, Garrett, no.

盖瑞特别这样

All right, we should have a little toast.

好了我们应该敬一杯

No, thanks. I'm driving.

不了谢谢我要开车

And Simon doesn't really drink.

西蒙不怎么喝酒

No, I drink. It's cool. I drink.

不我喝酒没关系我喝

- All right, that's my man. - Really?

-这才是我的兄弟 -真的吗

You wouldn't even have a glass

莉亚的家宴上

of Manischewitz at Leah's Seder.

你都不肯喝一杯葡萄酒

It's Halloween, man. It's a special occasion.

这可是万圣节是特殊场合

True that.

没错

Cheers.

干杯

You okay?

你还好吧

BGM: Never Fall in Love - Jack Antonoff/MØ

Abby is the hottest Wonder Woman I have ever seen.

艾比是我见过的最性感的神奇女侠

The shit that I would let her do to me with that lasso.

我愿意让她拿套索对我用那招

Oh, I know, man.

我知道

Just, like, tie me up with that thing.

把我捆绑起来之类的

You're not into Abby, are you?

你没喜欢上艾比吧

No, no, no.

不不

I mean, it's not like I... She's cute...

我又不... 她是很可爱

...but she's just not really my type.

但她不算是我的菜

Not because she's black. I love black women.

不是因为她是黑人我喜欢黑人女生

Not like, you know, I have a thing for black women,

但不是对黑种女人有特殊癖好

I just love all women.

我只是喜欢所有女人

- I'm gonna go ask her out. - What? No.

-我要约她出来 -什么不行

- No? No? - No.

-不行 -不行

- You can't ask Abby out. - Why not?

-你不能约她出来 -为什么

Because. She didn't tell you about Jonathan?

因为... 她没跟你说乔纳森的事吗

She didn't tell you about that?

她没跟你说

- No. - He's older.

-没有 -他比你大

In college.

大学生

He's really experienced.

经验丰富

You know I've only had sex once, right?

你知道我只做过一次爱吧

I know that.

我知道

You know, it's like no one tells you

没人告诉过你

how dark everything is

一切是多么黑暗

and how slippery everything gets, and, you know,

到处都滑溜溜的

the parts you think are the right parts

你以为是正确的部位

are actually the wrong parts and...

其实是错的然后...

All right, I'm gonna go eat my feelings away.

好了我要吃点东西冷静下

- Man, I'm sorry... - No, it's okay. Don't worry about it.

-我很抱歉 -不没关系别放心上

- Hey, Simon! - Hey.

-西蒙 -你好

Hey, you wanna play Beirut?

想玩啤酒兵乓吗

Yeah. Sure.

好啊

We just need two more people.

我们还需要两个人

How about you and me, and then, um...

不如你和我再加上...

I insist.

我坚持

Abby and Martin?

艾比和马丁

- Okay, cool. - Hey, Martin.

-好 -马丁

- Yeah. - Abby.

-什么事 -艾比

Let's play Beirut.

我们来玩啤酒兵乓

- No, I don't... - Yeah. Let's do it.

-我不... -来吧

Come on, let's go. It'll be fun. It'll be fun.

快点会很有趣的肯定的

Good old competition.

经典的比赛

- Ready? - Yeah, I'm ready.

-准备好了 -好了

Beirut. Right?

啤酒乒乓对吧

Yes!

对

Okay. Have you ever played Beirut before?

你以前玩过吗

Uh, totally. Yeah.

当然

Great. All right, so, two reracks, no blowing

好两次重设机会不许吹

and two balls in the cup means

两球投进同一杯意味着

that you have to take three, okay?

你得喝三杯懂了吗

Okay. Cool.

好的

I thought we were talking about a different game.

我以为我们说的是另一个游戏

We'll just explain as we go. Okay?

我们边玩边解释好吗

- Yeah. - Okay. Got it.

-好 -没问题

Ready? Maybe you should take these...

准备好了吗也许你该把眼镜...

- You'll see better. Right? - Good idea. Yeah.

-这样看得更清楚 -好主意

- All you. - Raindrop!

-看你了 -来了

Here we go, all right. You got this one.

开始了你投中了

Oh, is that... This is mine to drink?

我要喝掉吗

God.

天啊

All right.

好了

Chug! Chug! Chug!

干干干

Do we need a handshake? Is that...

我们需要握手吗

You get one of these in

你能投中一个

and we can totally have a handshake.

我们完全可以握个手

Fly it away. Fly it away.

来吧放马过来

Chug, chug, chug.

干干干

- Sweet! - All right.

-太棒了 -好了

Hey, Bram. It's me, Jacques.

布拉姆是我雅克

Hey, Bram. I'm Jacques.

布拉姆我是雅克

Hey, Barack. It's me, Jacques.

巴拉克是我雅克

Why did I pick Jacques?

我为什么选这个破名字

I'm sorry, I thought this was the bathroom.

不好意思我以为这是洗手间

Sorry.

抱歉

Hey, Martin, not now, man. All right?

马丁现在不是时候

I've had a big night.

我今晚很不顺

Really? Really?

你不是吧你在逗我吗

I'm sorry.

对不起

Come on!

拜托

- What are you doing? - I don't know.

-你在干什么 -我不知道

Are you serious?

你是认真的吗

Okay, come on. We gotta get you home.

好了得赶紧送你回家了

- Look, we're so close! - Oh, my God!

-看马上到了 -天啊

Wait, what?

怎么了

- Dude, my parents are still up. - Oh, God.

-我爸妈还没睡 -天啊

Okay, you know what... Come on.

好了快点

I need you to think of something really sad...

我需要你想一些很悲伤的事

Like, the documentary about how all the whales

比如讲述鲸鱼们痛恨

hate living at SeaWorld.

在海洋世界生活的纪录片

Too sad!

真悲伤

God. Okay, then just, you know what,

天啊好吧这样

don't say anything at all...

什么都别说

And we'll ditch the barf shirt till tomorrow.

我们把沾上呕吐物的衣服扔了明天再说

Okay.

好的

Si?

小西

Just as little as possible,

尽量别说话

say as little as possible.

说得越少越好

So how does that work?

后来怎么样

I know, I remember when I went to...

我记得当我们...

Guys!

伙计们

Come talk to us.

跟我们聊聊

- How was the party? - It was really fun.

-派对怎么样 -很好玩

- Was it? - Yeah.

-是吗 -对

Aces.

棒极了

Well. Thanks for letting me stay over.

谢谢你们让我来过夜

You've been staying over 10 years.

你都待了十多年了

You don't have to thank us.

不用谢我们

Yeah, thanks.

也对谢了

Stop.

别捣乱

John Lennon was wearing a woman's sweater.

约翰·列侬穿着女装毛衣

And he's drunk.

而且他喝醉了

- Definitely. - So how do we feel about that?

-肯定的 -所以我们该作何感想

Well, he didn't drive drunk,

他没有酒驾

and he's home before curfew, so...

而且在门禁之前回家了

Good. That's what I thought we thought.

很好我们就该这么想

Yeah, that's what we think, right?

是的我们就是这么想的对吧

- Yeah. We're good parents. - Yeah, we're good parents.

-是我们是称职的父母 -对我们是称职的父母

Right?

对吧

BGM: Sink In - Amy Shark

The room stopped spinning.

屋子终于不转了

Do you ever feel weird?

你有没有觉得很奇怪

- Weird? - Yeah.

-奇怪 -是的

Sometimes I feel like I'm always on the outside.

有时候我觉得自己一直是个局外人

What do you mean?

什么意思

Like tonight, you know...

就像今晚你知道的

I was at that party, and it was fun, but...

在派对的时候我玩得很开心但是

it kinda felt like I was watching it

感觉像是我在很远的地方

from across the room.

看着那一切

I don't know, there's this invisible line

我不知道像是有一条隐形的线

that I have to cross

我需要跨越过去

to really be a part of everything

才能真正参与进来

and I just, I can't ever cross it.

但我就是跨不过去

I feel that way sometimes, too.

我有时候也有这种感觉

Not tonight you didn't.

你今晚就没有

Yeah, I was trying something.

是的我在尝试一些东西

Yeah, sometimes I think it'd be so much easier

有时候我觉得当一个只要喝几杯酒

to be one of these people who can just take a few shots

就能在身边随便抓个人上床的人

and then hook up with whoever's closest.

会容易很多

Yeah, I guess I'm just unlucky.

我猜我就是运气不太好

Unlucky?

运气不太好

Why?

为什么

Because I'm not a casual person.

因为我不是个随便的人

What kind of person are you?

那你是怎样的人

I think I'm the kind of person

我觉得我

who is destined to care so much about one person,

天生注定会特别在乎对方

it nearly kills me.

这让我备受煎熬

Me too.

我也是

It's getting late.

挺晚了

Si?

小西

Yeah?

怎么了

Good night.

晚安

Good night.

晚安

Dear Blue,

亲爱的小蓝

so one of my friends likes the other,

我一个朋友喜欢我另一个朋友

and he has no idea. I guess we all have secrets.

而他毫不知情我想我们都有秘密吧

Anyway, I've been thinking about

总之我一直在想

why I haven't come out yet.

我为什么还没出柜

Maybe it's because it doesn't seem fair

可能是我觉得这样不公平

that only gay people have to come out.

只有同性恋才需要出柜

Why is straight the default?

为什么异性恋就是默认的性取向

I have something I need to tell you.

我想告诉你们一件事

Mom, there's something I have to tell you.

妈我要告诉你一件事

Can we talk?

我们能谈谈吗

Yeah.

好啊

I'm straight.

我是异性恋

I'm straight.

我是异性恋

I'm sorry, Mom, it's true.

抱歉妈妈是真的

I like girls.

我喜欢女孩

I like men.

我喜欢男人

You get that from your daddy's side.

你这是遗传了你爸爸

I'm in love with Nick.

我爱上了尼克

I feel like I've been raising a stranger.

我感觉自己养了一个陌生人

Yes, absolutely, you have.

是啊确实是的

I'm heterosexual.

我是异性恋

Oh, God. Help me, Jesus. Please.

老天爷帮帮我我的天求你了

Or maybe it's because I can't be sure

或许是因为我无法确定

this whole "Being gay" thing is forever.

我会一直都是同性恋

Or maybe it's that there's not that much of high school left

也可能是高中的时光所剩不多了

and part of me wants to hold on to

我有点想保持

who I've always been just a little longer.

我现在的身份更久一点

And then, when I go to college in Los Angeles,

然后等我去洛杉矶上大学后

I'll be gay and proud, I promise.

我会成为一名自豪的同性恋我保证

BGM: I Wanna Dance With Somebody - Whitney Houston

Yeah, maybe not that gay.

好吧或许没到那么基

I'm not sure who I'm promising.

我不知道我在向谁承诺

I'll keep ruminating.

我会继续思考的

Love, Jacques.

爱你的雅克

发送

你的邮件已发送

爱你的雅克

你的邮件已发送

Shit!

糟了

So, yeah, after swimming with dolphins,

在和海豚游泳之后

we fly to Saint Martin for New Year's.

我们会飞去圣马丁跨年

Anybody else, Christmas in the Caribbean?

还有谁圣诞节去加勒比海吗

Staying here.

就待在这儿

We have a classic Spier tradition

我们斯皮尔家族在圣诞夜

of French toast on Christmas Eve.

有吃法式吐司的传统

I'm going to an unheated vacation house

我要去一个荒郊野岭

in the middle of nowhere.

还没有暖气的地方

As is our bleak family tradition.

这是我们家庭阴冷的传统

Oh, man.

天啊

You okay?

你还好吧

Yeah, that's a paper cut.

被纸割到了

Overdramatic.

太夸张了吧

Simon, do you know where the bandages are?

西蒙你知道创口贴在哪吗

Yeah. They're just in the supply closet.

知道就在储物柜里

Okay, do you mind showing me?

好的要不你带我去找找

Be right back.

就回来

He's like a nurse, this man.

他就像个护士

Okay, I don't actually have a paper cut.

我其实没被纸割伤

I know that, Martin. You're a very bad actor.

我知道马丁你太不会演戏了

What, you think this is funny?

你觉得很搞笑吗

Simon, look, I don't wanna have to

西蒙我也不想

leak your emails, all right? But I will.

泄漏你的邮件但我还是会的

Look, you cannot bring Blue into this, okay?

听着你不能把小蓝掺和进来

If he found out that my emails got leaked,

要是他发现我的邮件被泄漏了

he'd get totally freaked, all right?

他会抓狂的

He'd never talk to me again.

他再也不会跟我说话了

Yeah, probably not, you know?

或许不会

The Internet's a freaky place to meet people.

网络可不是什么交朋友的好地方

- Fun movie! Freak. - Freaky Friday.

-有趣的电影《怪诞》 -《怪诞星期五》

- That's a fun movie! - Freaky, freak, freaky.

-那电影真好笑 -真古怪真古怪

Yeah, freaky-deaky Dutch!

是啊奇怪的荷兰人

You guys are weird.

你们太奇怪了

I need a Band-Aid. Those programs are a bitch.

我需要个创口贴这些项目太麻烦了

Yo. Martin was having trouble running his lines

马丁背台词遇到了点困难

and we were thinking we could go

我们在想我们可以

to Waffle House and go over 'em.

去松饼屋过一下台词

- Really? - Yeah.

-真的吗 -是啊

That would be great.

那就太好了

I'm insky.

我没问题

- Good work, Spier. - Go to hell, Martin.

-干得好斯皮尔 -去死吧马丁

Jacques, if I were a betting man,

雅克如果让我猜的话

I'd say you were drunk emailing me

我觉得你昨晚给我发邮件的时候

during that last letter.

肯定喝醉了

Don't worry. I liked it.

别担心我挺喜欢的

As for coming out, I know what you mean

至于出柜我明白你说的

about wanting to wait till college.

等到上大学再出柜是什么意思

But our emails have inspired me.

但我们之间的通信鼓舞了我

I'm going to tell my family. So thanks, Jacques.

我要向我家人出柜了谢谢你雅克

Love, Blue.

爱你的小蓝

松饼屋

Madame.

女士

Simon...

西蒙

How the thespians rehearse, right?

演员就是这样排练的对吧

Guys.

你们好啊

What can I get you?

你们需要什么吗

Lyle! You guys know Lyle? We have Latin together.

莱尔你们认识莱尔吗我们一起上拉丁文课

I don't think so.

好像不认识

How's it going?

你好

Actually, we had Bio together last year?

其实我们去年一起上的生物课

- Really? - It's Simon, right?

-真的吗 -你是西蒙对吧

Yeah. Yeah, sorry, I don't, um...

是的抱歉我不...

It's okay. It was like a big class,

没关系那节课人很多

and I have a good memory for faces.

而且我比较擅长记别人的长相

What can I get you guys?

你们想要来点什么

Well, we plan on being here for a while.

我们打算在这待一会

So, we're gonna start off small and go larger.

所以我们先来点小菜然后再点别的

Probably get some bacon first, some sausage. I'd say...

要不先来点培根和香肠吧

"You're right. I'm much too strange and extraordinary.

"你说得对我太奇怪太优秀了

Much! And much too distracting!"

非常非常勾魂"

And you never did any acting at your old school?

你在之前的那个学校没有表演过吗

No. Can we get back to...

没有我们能回到...

And yet, you're from D.C., right?

你来自华盛顿特区对吧

Yeah. Can you give me my next cue, though?

是的你能提示我下一句台词吗

So why did you move here?

你为什么搬过来

Because my parents got divorced

因为我爸妈离婚了

and my aunt found us an apartment in her building.

我姑妈在她那栋楼里为我们找了间公寓

Why'd they get divorced?

他们为什么离婚了

Why does it matter, Martin?

这有什么关系马丁

Are you writing a book about girls

你在写一本关于华盛顿

from a broken home in D.C.?

离异家庭女孩的书吗

So?

所以呢

I thought that my dad

我原以为我爸爸

was the greatest person on the planet.

是全世界最伟大的人

But it turns out that he's just a sad, tired loser

但结果他只是个可悲的失败者

who hates his job, drinks way too much beer,

他讨厌他的工作疯狂酗酒

and cheats on his wife.

还背叛了他的妻子

To make up for all the stuff that I just mentioned, so...

为了弥补我刚提到的那些事情

Well, I'm sorry to hear that.

很遗憾听到这些

Yeah.

没事

You deserve the father that you thought you had.

你值得拥有理想的父亲

You know what, Abby?

你知道吗艾比

You deserve a goddamn superhero.

你值得拥有一个超级大英雄

Okay, thank you. Let's get back to the...

好吧谢了我们回到...

Say it.

说出来

What?

说什么

I wanna hear you say

我想听你说

"I, Abby Susso, am an incredible young woman

"我艾比·苏索是个很棒的女孩

and deserve a goddamn superhero."

值得拥有一个超级英雄"

I'm not gonna say that, Martin.

我不会说的马丁

Okay. Well, um...

好吧

I won't stop until you say it.

你不说我就不停

Okay.

好吧

- What are you... - Excuse me.

-你要做什么 -不好意思

- Waffle House patrons! - Martin. Martin, stop.

-松饼屋的顾客们 -马丁马丁下来

- Pardon the interruption. - Martin.

-抱歉打扰下 -马丁

I would just like to say that Abby Susso here

我想说这位艾比·苏索

is an incredible young woman.

是个很棒的女孩

Martin, please.

马丁求你

- And deserves a goddamn superhero. - Okay, okay...

-而且值得拥有一个超级英雄 -好了

That's right. Abby Susso!

对艾比·苏索

Abby Susso is an incredible young woman!

艾比·苏索是位很棒的女孩

I'm Abby Susso!

我是艾比·苏索

Incredible young woman, and deserves...

是位很棒的女孩而且值得拥有...

- A goddamn superhero. - A goddamn superhero.

-一位超级英雄 -一位超级英雄

- A goddamn superhero! - A goddamn superhero!

-一位超级英雄 -一位超级英雄

A goddamn superhero!

一位超级英雄

Yeah.

太棒了

All right.

好样的

Breakthrough. Yeah.

大突破

Okay, you can all go back to your meals. Thank you.

大家可以继续用餐了谢谢

Please sit down. Please.

求你坐下来求你了

Well, let's get back to...

我们回到...

- my entrance into your song. - I'm gonna take five.

-我在你的歌出场那段 -我休息五分钟

"The Kit Kat Klub proudly presents...

"猫女郎夜总会隆重有请...

I'll be right back.

我马上就回来

...A beautiful woman coming straight from England.

一位来自英国的漂亮女士

Sally Bowles, everybody."

各位莎莉·鲍尔斯"

Were you in Bio when they did that identifying leaves test?

做树叶识别测试那节生物课你在吗

Yes. And Joel Winslow ate that poison ivy.

是的乔尔·温斯洛吃了毒葛

Because Doug Fogerty told him it was pot.

因为道格·福格蒂告诉他那是大麻

- Right. - Poor Joel.

-对的 -可怜的乔尔

I think he just wants to be liked 'cause...

我觉得他只是想被大家喜欢

you ever notice that he has extra pens in his backpack?

你有没有注意到他书包里总会多备一支笔

Like, you know, he's just waiting for the day

好像他就等着哪一天

that someone comes up to ask him for a pen?

某人走上去找他借笔

And then he can be that guy to give 'em a pen.

然后他就能借别人笔了

You see everything, don't you, Simon?

你洞察一切啊西蒙

I don't know.

我也不确定

But Simon means "The one who hears"

但是"西蒙"的意思是"聆听万物"

and Spier means "The one who sees"

而"斯皮尔"意思是"洞察一切"

so you put that all together

把这些放到一起

and pretty sure that means I was just destined

就知道那意味着我注定

to be up in everybody's business.

要掺和所有人的事

I've gotta get back inside

我得回去了

and scrub down some waffle irons.

要清洗烤华夫饼机

- Duty calls. - Indeed.

-公务在身 -没错

I'll see you in there.

里面见

Yeah, I'll see ya.

回见

So my dad's flying in tonight for Hanukkah.

我爸今晚坐飞机来过光明节

If you are thinking,

如果你在想

"But Hanukkah isn't for another month!"

离光明节还有一个月呢

Well, you are correct.

你是正确的

Welcome to navigating divorced parents.

欢迎来到周旋于离异父母的世界

Take holidays where you can get them.

珍惜每一次过节的机会

And my dad's staying at the same crappy motel as always.

我爸一如既往住在那个糟糕的汽车旅馆

We'll do all our horribly awkward traditions.

我们会做所有可怕又尴尬的传统项目

We'll light the menorah and I'll silently pray

我会点亮烛台然后暗自祈祷

that the sprinklers don't go off.

不要触发烟雾报警器

That's happened twice before.

这事之前发生过两次了

Would you believe I'm considering doubling down

你能相信我正在考虑冒更大的险

and turning this whole awkward mess into a coming out thing?

借由这尴尬混乱局面出柜吗

Do you think I'm crazy?

你觉得我是疯了吗

No, Blue, I don't think you're crazy.

不小蓝我不认为你疯了

I think you're crazy brave.

我认为你非常勇敢

Honestly, Martin used to annoy the crap out of me.

老实说马丁过去总是惹我生气

But he's actually kind of a cool person.

但他其实挺酷的

I've been meaning to ask you about your parents.

我一直想问你关于你父母的事情

I just didn't wanna say anything

刚才在餐厅的时候

when we were actually in the restaurant.

我并不想多说什么

I wasn't sure if you wanted to talk about it.

不确定你是否想谈这些

Yeah. No, I don't mention it a lot

是啊我不经常提起这些

because it kind of messes with my image.

因为会破坏我的形象

What kind of image?

什么形象

The girl who is excited

一个非常期待在学校

to start a new school senior year.

开始新高三生活的女孩

Girl whose life didn't just end,

一个生活并没有在三个月前

like, three months ago,

就结束的女孩

who's angry and sad all the time.

一个一直以来都悲愤交加的女孩

Girl who still believes in love.

一个始终相信爱情的女孩

Come on. You still believe in love.

得了吧你一定还相信爱情

Maybe.

也许吧

Have you ever been in love?

你曾经爱过吗

I think so.

我想是的

Abby.

艾比

Yeah?

怎么了

I'm gay.

我是同性恋

You can't tell anyone though.

但你不能告诉任何人

Nobody really knows,

没有人知道

and I don't really want people to find out.

我也不想让别人发现这件事

I won't. I promise.

我不会说的我保证

Okay.

好的

You surprised?

你很意外吗

No.

没有

- So you knew? - No.

-所以你早就知道了 -没有

But you're not surprised?

但你并不感到意外

Do you want me to be surprised?

你希望我感到意外吗

I don't know.

我不知道

Okay. Well, I love you.

好吧我爱你

So...

所以

Love you, too.

我也爱你

There's no one behind us.

我们后面没有人

You don't have to put your blinker on.

你不需要打左转向灯

- Okay, just being safe. - Yeah.

-好吧只想安全第一 -好吧

Dear Blue, I hope it goes okay with your dad.

亲爱的小蓝我希望你和你爸一切进展顺利

Whatever happens, you inspired me.

无论发生什么你激励了我

I came out to my friend tonight.

我今晚向朋友出柜了

I never would have done that without you.

没有你我永远也做不到

Maybe we should ride this bravery train

也许我们应该坐上这趟勇敢号列车

and reveal our identities.

揭开我们真正的身份

I'm dying to know who you are. Love, Jacques.

我急切想知道你是谁爱你的雅克

I told my dad.

我告诉了我爸

It was insanely awkward. But also, kind of fine.

超级尴尬但也还好

And you got it backwards.

而且你搞反了

It's you who inspires me.

是你激励了我

But I'm sorry,

但很抱歉

I'm just not ready for us to know each other's identities.

我还没有准备好知道彼此的身份

Love, Blue.

爱你的小蓝

- What are you doing? - I'm a fry shark!

-你在干什么 -我是薯条鲨鱼

- That is good. - You're a good fry shark.

-好美味 -你是条不错的薯条鲨鱼

- Thank you, thank you. - I like that.

-谢谢谢谢 -我喜欢这个

I didn't even know you were coming near.

我都不知道你在靠近我

You know what day it is?

你知道今天是什么日子吗

- What day is it? - Must be Friday!

-什么日子 -一定是周五

I guess I'm being loved, right? Right?

我猜我是被爱的不是吗

- Yeah. - Excuse me.

-是的 -失陪一下

What do you get when you get black and Jewish?

黑人和犹太人的混合体是什么

- What? - Bluish.

-是什么 -蓝色[发音相似]

That's mean.

这样说太过分啦

Simon?

西蒙

Since when does Abby find Martin so goddamn funny?

艾比什么时候开始觉得马丁有趣了

Yeah, it's crazy.

我知道太疯狂了

You know, this is stupid.

这太蠢了

I'm just gonna tell her that I like her.

我打算直接告诉她我喜欢她

And I've been thinking the whole sexual experience thing,

而且我一直在想性经验

it's not that big of a deal.

并没那么重要

And, actually, I've been practicing, right?

事实上我一直在练习你知道吗

I got this thing online.

我从网上搞来这个东西

It's really cool. It's called a pocket puss...

超级酷叫做便携阴道

Abby likes Martin.

艾比喜欢马丁

She told me herself.

她告诉我的

- But he's Martin. - I know.

-但那可是马丁 -我知道

Look, I don't care.

我不在乎

- I'm gonna try. - Wait, wait.

-我要去搏一把 -等等

What about Leah?

那莉亚怎么办

What about Leah?

莉亚怎么了

Dude.

兄弟

- Leah's in love with you. - No, she's not.

-莉亚爱上你了 -不她没有

Are you kidding me?

你在逗我吗

I mean, come on. The way she looks at you

得了吧她看你的眼神

and how she's been all jealous ever since Abby's been around?

以及自从艾比出现后她的那股醋意

And she blushes every time you come into the room.

每次你出现她都会脸红

Look, you and Abby...

听着你和艾比

it's never gonna happen.

永远不会有结果的

But you and Leah...

但是你和莉亚

I mean, you could be incredible together.

你俩有可能是天作之合

What's up?

你好吗

So I have something to tell you.

我有件事要告诉你

Nick just asked me to get dinner before the homecoming game.

尼克约我在返校日比赛前去吃晚餐

Okay.

好吧

No, like, Si, he was like...

你没明白小西他...

He came up to me and he's like,

他走到我面前然后问我

"Do you wanna go get dinner?"

"想一起吃晚餐吗"

All right, and I was like,

然后我说

"Sure, are Abby and Simon in?" And he was like

"没问题艾比和西蒙也来吗" 然后他说

"I was thinking it could just be the two of us. Like, a date."

"我在想也许就我们两个人去约会"

That's amazing.

这太棒了

It is?

是吗

Yeah.

当然了

Leah, come on.

莉亚别装了

I know you're into him.

我知道你喜欢他

What?

什么

All that stuff that you were talking

布拉姆的派对结束后那晚

about the night after Bram's party,

你说的那些话

about, you know, being so into one person

关于深爱着某人时

that it almost kills you.

那种备受煎熬的感受

You were talking about Nick.

你是在说尼克

So you think I should go out with him?

所以你觉得我应该答应他

Yes. Yes.

是的没错

Okay.

好吧

- Yeah? - Yeah!

-真的吗 -是的

I promise you, you're not gonna regret it.

我保证你不会后悔的

It's gonna be great!

一切都会很棒的

Let's pull out your claws, Grizzlies!

伸出你们的爪子吧灰熊们

Simon, that Almont QB is insanely hot.

西蒙那个叫阿尔蒙特的四分卫太性感了

We can talk about stuff like this now, you know.

我们现在可以谈论这些事情了

Yeah, I still don't know if I really quite figured out how.

好吧我还是没太搞明白怎么聊

- Seriously? - Yeah.

-真的吗 -是的

We gotta practice. All right. Simon.

我们得练习西蒙

- Yeah? - Do you think

-什么事 -你认为

that quarterback is lookin' fine in those hot pants?

那个穿紧身裤的四分卫性感吗

He's lookin' pretty fine.

他看上去很性感

No. No. No.

不不不是这样

Fine! Good. Put your body into it.

性感很好扭动你的身体

Fine!

性感

That was really good.

刚才那次非常棒

- That was so good. - Thanks.

-真的很好 -谢谢

Check it out. It's the Waffle House guy.

快看那是在松饼屋打工的那个人

Yeah.

没错

- Lyle? - I don't know. Could be.

-是莱尔吗 -我不知道有可能

- I don't know. - Do you think he's...

-我真的不知道 -你觉得他是

I don't know.

我不知道

Okay, well, you should talk to him.

好吧你应该和他谈谈

I'm gonna go get a coffee.

我去买杯咖啡

Look, you are fine!

听着你很性感

You got this.

你能行的

If it isn't my favorite waiter.

这不是我最爱的服务生吗

There he is. The guy who sees everything.

他在这呢洞察一切的人

Yeah.

是啊

I wouldn't have taken you for a homecoming guy.

我没想到你会来看返校节比赛

Just here for the coffee.

我只是来喝咖啡的

Of course. Yeah, it's all about the cappuccinos

当然了你只在乎卡布奇诺

and camaraderie for this guy.

和同志情谊

I'm glad you're here.

我很高兴你来了

You are?

真的吗

Yeah.

是的

'Cause I wanted to ask you something.

因为我有事想问你

I was gonna ask you the other day

本来我那天就打算问你

and then I was, like, too chickenshit.

但我太胆怯了

What's Abby's deal?

艾比是什么情况

I know you and her hang out a lot.

我知道你和她经常一起玩

Are the two of you like a thing, or...

你俩是一对吗还是

No.

不

No, uh, we're just friends.

不我们只是朋友

I could never be just friends with someone that hot.

我绝对没法跟如此性感的人只做朋友

Yeah!

我知道

Every day is a struggle.

每一天都充满挣扎

I gotta go. I'll see ya.

我得走了回见

Hey! You!

站住说你呢

Little birdie told me you're into bears!

有只小鸟告诉我你喜欢熊

Dude! It's me!

兄弟是我

I'm the Creekwood bear.

我是吉祥物溪木熊

Of course, you are.

你当然是了

Thank you.

谢谢

Not a compliment.

这不是赞美

I figured out my next move with Abby.

我知道下一步该怎么追艾比了

Great, that's good for you, Martin.

棒极了这是好事马丁

I just wanted to run it by you real quick.

我只是想听听你的意见

No, Martin, look.

不马丁

I've been helping you for weeks

我已经帮你好几周了

and I am sick and tired of helping you mess with my friends' lives.

我受够了帮你搅合我朋友的生活

So why don't you just do that shit that you did at Waffle House?

你为何不故伎重演松饼屋的那一套呢

That went great.

那次进展得很顺利

So you're saying I should go for it?

所以你认为我该大胆去做吗

It's kind of a big gesture.

稍微有点兴师动众哦

Go big or go home! Right, Martin?

不鸣则已一鸣惊人不是吗马丁

Go big or go home.

不鸣则已一鸣惊人

I like that. Thanks for the pep talk, man!

我喜欢谢谢你为我打气兄弟

Gotta get amped up.

要兴奋起来了

Come on!

加油

We're gonna take ya!

我们会打败你们的

Ethan!

伊森

I didn't know you like football.

原来你还喜欢橄榄球

He's just here to check out the packages.

他只是来看球员的裆部

Didn't your mother ever tell you

你妈妈没教你吗

not to grab your micropenis in public?

不要当众摸你的迷你小鸡鸡

Could we get some hummus for that baby carrot?

能拿点鹰嘴豆酱吗胡萝卜得蘸着吃

Shut up, man.

别说了

- Hey, guys. - What's up? Hey.

-你们好呀 -来啦

- How was dinner? - It was good.

-晚餐怎么样 -挺好的

Yeah, uh, we got soup dumplings.

我们吃了灌汤饺

That dumpling place I told you about?

是我给你推荐的那家店吗

Yeah.

对

You know, maybe you could go with Martin.

也许你可以跟马丁一起去

Why would I go with Martin?

我为什么要跟马丁一起去

Please stand for the national anthem.

全体起立唱国歌

This goes out to all the refugees.

谨此向所有难民致敬

And my vocal coach, Monica Lewis.

感谢我的声乐指导莫妮卡·路易斯

What the hell are you doing?

你到底要干什么

Sorry. Hi.

抱歉大家好

Hi, everyone. Uh, sorry to interrupt.

你们好抱歉打断大家

Why are we interrupting the national anthem?

为什么要打断国歌

But I have something to say...

我有话要说

that's a little more important than the national anthem.

我的话比国歌要稍微重要一点

No offense, America.

无意冒犯美国

Abigail Katherine Susso...

艾比盖尔·凯瑟琳·苏索

when you transferred to Creekwood High School,

你转来溪木镇高中

just a short three and a half months ago,

是短短的三个半月前

you not only transferred into a new school,

你不仅走进了一所新学校

you transferred your way into a new heart

也走进了一颗心

belonging to me. My heart. Right here.

就是我的心在这里

And whether it was being your partner in pong,

不管是当你的啤酒乒乓玩伴

or your Waffle House warrior,

还是你的松饼屋战士

I have cherished...

我都很珍惜...

the 135,300 minutes that we've spent together.

跟你在一起的135300分钟

Oh, I'm sorry.

抱歉

135,301 minutes.

是135301分钟

And I know that you're this smart, talented

我知道你如此聪慧有才

perfect creature.

堪称完美

And, uh, I'm just a sweaty schlub

而我只是个穿着熊服

in a bear costume.

浑身汗渍的傻瓜

But like old Bogie used to say,

但就像那首歌唱的一样

it's a "Crazy mixed-up world."

"这世界多姿多彩"

So, Abby,

所以艾比

without further ado...

言归正传

will you go out with me?

你愿意跟我约会吗

She's too hot for you, assface!

她那么性感你配不上傻逼

Excuse me. Sorry.

抱歉借过

Just say yes. Say yes.

答应他吧答应他

Martin...

马丁

I am so sorry.

真的对不起

I don't feel that way about you.

我对你没那种感觉

You don't?

真的吗

No.

对

But I really like hanging out with you

但我很喜欢和你一起玩

and I don't know, maybe we could still be friends, you know?

也许我们以后还可以做朋友

Are those doves?

那些是鸽子吗

No, no, hey, hey! Suraj!

不要等等苏拉杰

Hey! No, no! She said no! No, don't.

别放了她拒绝了不要

Yo, I thought you said she liked him.

你不是说她喜欢他吗

Not the ceremonious dove launch I was hoping for.

这不是我想看到的飞鸽仪式

But still uplifting to free some birds.

不过能放飞它们还是挺开心的

Yeah.

是啊

Okay, uh...

好了

Enjoy the game.

享受比赛吧

Nice try, Martin! And way to go, Martin!

你做得好马丁非常厉害

You gave it a shot! Right?

最起码努力过了对吧

That was terrible.

太糟糕了

Don't worry, people will get over it in a few weeks.

别担心几周后大家就会忘记了

小伙失恋了我笑得停不下来

猛熊出击

史诗级失败

This is Donald J. Trump.

我是唐纳德·特朗普

Martin Addison can't come to the phone right now.

马丁·艾迪森现在不方便接电话

Hey, Martin, it's Simon. Again.

马丁是我西蒙

Um, look, I wanna make sure you're doing all right.

我只是想看看你现在还好吗

I know it's been tough since, uh...

我知道你现在心里不好受

Well, you know since when. Um, listen. Just...

毕竟发生了那样的事听我说

Just give me a call back, okay?

给我回个电话吧好吗

I just wanna make sure you're okay.

我想知道你是否还好

Hey! What you doin' in there?

你在里面干什么呢

Really?

搞什么

I need you to help me decorate. Untangle these for me, will ya?

来帮我一起装饰先解开这个

This is not cool. I'll be down in a minute, okay?

你这样不好我马上下去

- What's not cool? - I'll be down in a minute.

-怎么不好 -我这就下去

The fact that you're on a ladder next to my room!

你不该踩着梯子站在我窗外

I can still clearly see you.

我还能看见你

All right, there you go. Okay. Merry Christmas.

这下看不见了好吧圣诞快乐

Jacques,

雅克

I'm drinking eggnog and packing

我在喝蛋奶酒收拾行李

to go to my dad's cabin on Lake Rabun.

准备去我爸在雷本湖的小屋住

I'm pretty sure there's a photo of it

我确定在"荒山野岭"的维基主页上

on the Wikipedia page for "Middle of nowhere."

肯定有那里的照片

Middle of nowhere.

荒山野岭

I'm going to an unheated vacation house

我要去荒山野岭的度假屋了

in the middle of nowhere.

而且还没暖气

Oh, shit.

我操

There's barely electricity

那里几乎没有电

and definitely no cell service

而且绝对没有手机信号

so this will be my last email for a while.

所以短期内这是我最后一封邮件了

It should be a real rite of passage.

绝对是此生难忘的成年礼

A dad and his gay son pretending they like

父亲和基佬儿子假装喜欢钓鱼

to fish and trying to find things to talk about.

努力找话题尬聊

It's gonna to be an excruciating two weeks

这两周没有你绝对会很难熬

without you, Jacques. Love, Blue.

雅克爱你的小蓝

Sounds like you're gonna need some good music.

听起来你很需要一些好音乐

So I'm sending a list of the seven best

我给你发一张歌单

Christmas songs of all time.

史上最赞的七首圣诞曲目

Of course it includes David Bowie's

当然包括大卫·鲍伊的

"Little Drummer Boy,"

《小鼓手》

and Smokey Robinson & The Miracles'

以及斯摩基·罗宾逊和奇迹乐队的

"Christmas Everyday,"

《每天都是圣诞节》

but the number one song you're gonna need,

但你最需要的一首歌是

and trust me, I know this sounds

相信我虽然这话听起来

a little bit twee...

有点矫情...

BGM: Someday at Christmas - Jackson 5

莉亚

Si, have you seen it?

小西你看了吗

Seen what?

看什么

CreekSecrets.

溪木镇树洞

You need to look at your computer right away.

你赶紧去电脑上看

Dear fellow Creekwood students,

亲爱的溪木镇同学们

Simon Spier has a secret male pen pal.

西蒙·斯皮尔有一位神秘男笔友

Because he's gay.

因为他是同性恋

Interested parties may contact him directly

感兴趣的人请直接联系他

to discuss arrangements for butt sex.

沟通肛交性爱的具体细节

Ladies need not apply.

女士们不必申请

We should all probably be talking about this

我们应该多聊聊这个

instead of Martin Addison's homecoming debacle

别再说马丁·艾迪森返校节大崩溃了

which was actually kind of sweet,

其实仔细想想他的举动

and romantic, if you think about it.

还是挺甜蜜和浪漫的

Sincerely, Anonymous.

佚名

Si, have you read it?

小西你看了吗

I can't talk right now.

先不说了

- No. Si, wait! - I gotta go.

-不要小西等等 -我先挂了

Si?

小西

I saw it.

我看了

I already reported it. They're gonna take it down.

我已经举报了他们会删除的

It's too late. No, there's people who've already seen it, so...

太晚了已经有人看过了

it doesn't really matter.

无所谓了

It's true.

是真的

I'm gay.

我是同性恋

So what are you gonna do?

你打算怎么办

I don't know.

不知道

You could deny it.

你可以否认

Why the hell would I deny it, Nora?

我为什么要否认诺拉

I'm not ashamed of it.

我并不以此为耻

You've just never really said anything.

但你一直什么都没说

So what?

那又如何

What does that have to do with anything?

我什么都没说跟这事有关系吗

What the hell are you talking about?

你到底在说什么啊

Sorry.

对不起

I know you're going off the grid

我知道你现在不能上网

and you won't see this until you're back,

可能回来之后才会看到

but something's happened.

但发生了一些事

You're gonna find out who I am.

你会知道我的身份

And someone posted our emails.

有人发了我们的邮件截图

Please don't freak out. Please, Blue.

你别害怕求你了小蓝

I need you to promise me you won't disappear.

我想请你保证不会消失

艾比: 西蒙请打给我我爱你尼克: 哥们一起散个步吗莉亚: 请打给我拜托

索菲: 爱你西蒙打给我艾比: 西蒙请打给我我爱你尼克: 哥们一起散个步吗莉亚: 请打给我拜托

Mum, let me open my present.

妈我要开礼物

Honey, I'm trying to tell you you need to shave.

亲爱的我是想说你得刮胡子了

Does that mean you're gonna keep cooking?

那你是同意继续做饭了吗

Yeah, of course. I can make dinner tonight, too.

当然今晚的晚餐我也可以做

- Awesome. - What's this for?

-棒 -这是干什么的

This one, Sherlock. There you go.

这个大神探给你

What is it?

是什么

Bluetooth headphones.

蓝牙耳机

- Do you like the black? - Oh, I love it.

-你喜欢黑色吗 -特别喜欢

Because I didn't know if you liked...

我不确定你会不会喜欢...

This is great.

挺好的

- They have other colors. - He said he likes it.

-还有其他颜色 -他说很喜欢

- No, I love it. - Okay. I have the receipt.

-我很喜欢 -收据还留着呢

He's good.

挺好的

Actually, I did want to talk to you guys about something.

其实我确实有话想跟你们说

What is it?

什么事

Uh, well...

是这样...

Let me guess...

我猜猜

you got somebody pregnant.

你把人家肚子搞大了

No, you're pregnant.

不是你怀孕了

- Yeah. Yeah, I'm pregnant. - I knew it.

-对我怀孕了 -我就知道

- He's got that glow about him, baby. - Honey.

-他整个人都容光焕发的 -别闹了

No. Uh...

不是...

I'm gay.

我是同性恋

Honey.

宝贝

And I don't want you guys to think anything different.

我不希望你们有什么其他想法

I'm still me.

我还是我

Of course you are.

这是当然

- Oh, Simon. - Yeah.

-西蒙 -对

So you're gay?

你是同性恋吗

Which one of your old girlfriends turned ya?

是哪个前女友把你掰弯的

Was it the one with the big eyebrow...

是不是那个眉毛很粗的...

- Jack. - Jesus Christ.

-杰克 -有完没完

Dad, can you ever shut the hell up?

爸你就不能消停会儿吗

I'm kidding.

我开玩笑的

- It's not funny. - I'm kidding, Nora.

-不好笑 -我开个玩笑而已诺拉

Just open up your gift. Please.

你好好拆礼物吧

It's okay, honey.

没关系亲爱的

- Nora, I got you this. - Simon.

-诺拉我给你买了这个 -西蒙

That's for you. No, that's for you.

给你的就是给你的

That's from me.

我买来送你的

It's a Cuisinart.

是食品加工机

I love it. Thank you, Simon.

我很喜欢谢谢西蒙

Dear Blue, happy New Year.

亲爱的小蓝新年快乐

如何打扮得像个同志

I haven't heard from you,

一直没有你的消息

so I'm going to assume it's because you have no service.

我猜是因为你没有信号

I came out to my entire family on Christmas.

我在圣诞节当天在家人面前出柜了

It didn't go great.

并不顺利

And I've been avoiding my friends

整个圣诞假期由于各种原因

the whole break for all sorts of reasons.

我一直在躲我所有的朋友

Change is exhausting.

改变令我身心俱疲

I feel like there's nowhere to hide

我觉得身边一切新事物

from all the newness of everything.

让我无处可藏

Except here. With you.

除了在这里跟你在一起

Please write to me.

请给我回信吧

As soon as you get even one bar of service.

等你哪怕只有一格信号的时候

Breakfast burrito?

早餐卷饼来一个吗

Thanks.

谢了

Hey, Si.

小西

Come sit down.

来坐下吧

I'm gonna be late.

我要迟到了

Hey, guys.

早上好

Hey, Simon, we need to talk.

西蒙我们得聊聊

So Abby and I hung out on New Year's Eve, and...

我和艾比一起过了除夕夜现在...

you see, now we're together.

我们在一起了

That's awesome. That's great.

太好了恭喜你们

Yeah, it is.

确实很好

But then we got to talking about why it took so long.

但之后我们聊了聊为什么拖了这么久

Why did you tell Nick

你为什么和尼克说

that I have a boyfriend in college named Jonathan?

我有个读大学的男朋友乔纳森

Why'd you make that up?

你为什么要编这个谎话

Look, Martin...

听着马丁他...

he was the one who wrote that CreekSecrets post about me.

就是那个在溪木镇树洞发帖说我的那个人

He screenshotted my emails

他偷拍了我的邮件

and he's been using them to blackmail me for months.

然后用这事勒索我好几个月了

What does that have to do with us, Simon?

这事和我们有什么关系西蒙

He told me that if I didn't help him get with Abby,

他说如果我不帮他泡艾比

he'd out me.

他就替我出柜

And I...

然后我...

That's why I had to keep you guys apart.

这就是我把你俩分开的原因

So you made up a bunch of lies.

所以说你编造了一堆谎言

And that's why you convinced me to go on that date with Leah?

这就是你说服我和莉亚约会的原因吗

You know, to keep me away from Abby?

就为了让我远离艾比吗

So, wait. Running lines at Waffle House

等等去松饼屋对台词

and beer pong at Bram's,

以及布拉姆家的乒乓啤酒

all of that was just to pawn me off on Martin?

那一切都只是为了把我推给马丁吗

I'm not a piece of meat, Simon.

我不是块肉西蒙

You know how hard it was for me to start over.

你知道对我而言重新开始是有多难

I trusted you.

我信任你

Hey, come on, Leah. I'll take you to school.

来吧莉亚我们一起走

Leah. Leah, please.

莉亚莉亚拜托了

Listen, listen.

听我说听我说

I know I messed up, okay?

我知道我搞砸了好吗

But I knew you were in love with Nick.

但我知道你喜欢尼克

- And I thought that maybe... - Just stop it!

-然后我以为也许... -别说了

You know what? You are insanely stupid, Simon.

你猜怎么着你真是蠢得没边了西蒙

I was never in love with Nick. I was in love with you!

我从来没有喜欢过尼克我喜欢的是你

Look...

听着...

We're... We're us.

我们...我们是我们啊

Yeah, well...

是啊...

Sorry.

抱歉

I've been trying to tell you.

我一直想告诉你

That night I slept over,

我去你家住的那晚

I was trying to tell you.

我本来想告诉你的

You wanna know the funniest part?

你想知道最搞笑的是什么吗

It's that all these years, you being so picky with girls,

这么多年来你一直对女生很挑剔

I thought that maybe it was because you might like me, too.

我就以为也许那是因为你也喜欢我

And then, you know, you told me

然后你告诉我

I should go out with Nick

我应该和尼克约会

and I realized you were just never gonna see me that way.

我才意识到你永远也不会对我有那种感觉

I can deal with you being gay, Si.

我可以接受你是同性恋小西

But you set me up to get my heart broken

但你骗了我让我心碎

when you thought I was in love with Nick

就因为你以为我喜欢尼克

and that just makes you cruel.

这就真的太残忍了

You all right?

你还好吗

Hanging in there.

还撑得住

Uh, for the record,

声明一下

when I was saying that we have a lot in common, you know,

我说我俩有很多共同点的时候

I wasn't really... That's not what I was talking about.

我不是... 我想说的不是那个意思

Gotcha.

明白

Just FYI, just for the record.

就和你说一声声明一下

- Okay, great. Thanks. - All right.

-好的棒极了谢谢 -好吧

Hey, Jackie.

你好啊洁姬

Did you date me because you think I look like a guy?

你和我约会是因为你觉得我像个男的吗

No. No, I actually broke up with you

不实际上是我和你分手

because you don't look like a guy.

就是因为你不像个男的

Oh, okay. Thanks.

好吧谢了

Welcome.

不客气

Yeah! Hey, Creekwood!

大家好啊溪木镇

This one's for you, Spier.

这是献给你的斯皮尔

Hey, Ethan.

你好啊伊森

You like that, don't you, Spier?

你喜欢这个是不是斯皮尔

Oh, yeah, Ethan, Simon likey.

噢耶伊森西蒙喜欢

You have something you wanna say to me?

你们有什么想对我说的吗

I said do you have something to say to me?

我说你们有什么想对我说的吗

- I'll take it from here. - Hey, Ms. Albright.

-我来解决 -奥布莱特老师

Don't "Hey, Ms. Albright" me.

别跟我来这一套

We're not friends.

我们不是朋友

You're not gonna braid my hair or paint my nails.

你不会有机会给我编辫子或者涂指甲

Get your ass off the table now!

马上从桌子上滚下来

You sweaty, hormonal virgins.

你们两个汗津津的激素过剩的处男

You know what? You're about to be suspended for so long,

你猜怎么着你俩要被停课很长一段时间了

that by the time it's over,

等你们重获自由的时候

you're gonna be the fat, bald, unhappily married

你俩都会变成又肥又秃婚姻不幸

wildly mediocre nobodies you're destined to become.

极度平庸的无名之辈这是你们命中注定的

You can't talk to us like that.

你不能这样和我们说话

Actually, I can, 'cause I just did.

实际上我可以因为我刚刚就这么说了

And you know why?

知道为什么吗

Because you're just those two assholes

因为你们是在全校面前

that did that shitty thing in front of the whole school.

做出这种破事的两个混蛋

And guess what?

你们猜怎么着

Nobody feels sorry for those assholes, especially me.

没人会同情这种混蛋尤其是我

Now, walk. Mr. Worth's office now.

快走吧去沃斯老师办公室

Bye.

拜

That's mine now.

这玩意是我的了

I'mma sell it. Get my tubes tied.

我会卖掉它换钱去做结扎

Why does Mr. Worth have to talk to us?

为什么沃斯老师要找我们谈话

I mean, can't we just let this shit go?

就不能让这破事过去吗

Hey, I'm sorry, Ethan.

对不起伊森

None of this ever happened when just you were out.

只有你一个人出了柜的时候这些都没发生过

You know what they say, one gay's a snooze,

俗话说得好一个同性恋没什么

two's a hilarious hate crime.

两个就是搞笑的仇恨犯罪了

You could've told me you were gay.

你本可以告诉我你是同志的

I guess I didn't think we had very much in common.

我猜我之前不觉得我们有什么共同点吧

You're telling me, Simon.

可不是嘛西蒙

It's not like your all-hoodie wardrobe rocks my world.

你的兜帽衫衣品可没有震动我的世界

I don't know.

我也说不好

Maybe I was jealous.

也许我是嫉妒

You've been out since you were 16.

你16岁就出柜了

It always seemed so easy for you.

一直感觉你轻而易举就做到了

Easy?

轻而易举

Are you kidding me?

你在逗我吗

My mom still tells my grandparents

每周日我们去我祖父母家吃晚饭时

about all the girls I'm dating

我妈还会和他们讲

when we go over to their house for dinner, every Sunday.

我"约会"的那些女孩子周周如此

She says it's 'cause they're old and religious,

她说这是因为他们很老了又信教

and it's just easier that way.

这样会轻松一些

I don't know, maybe that's true.

我也不知道也许真是这样吧

But you should hear her voice when she talks about the girls.

但你真该听听她谈论那些女生时的声音

All right, boys, come on in.

好了小子们进来吧

Come on.

来吧

All right, just stand right here.

好了站在这里

Get up.

起来

Okay, these gentlemen have something

好了这两位男士有些话

that they would like to say to you.

想对你们说

- We're sorry. - Our bad.

-对不起 -是我们的错

That's right. 'Cause at Creekwood High,

没错因为在溪木镇高中

what do we believe in?

我们的宗旨是什么

Tolerance.

包容

And "tolerance" means we respect

"包容"意味着我们尊重

Simon and Ethan's choice to be boyfriends.

西蒙和伊森做情侣的选择

- We are not boyfriends. - Yeah. No.

-我们不是情侣 -没错

Hey, whatever you wanna call it,

随你们怎么说

it's fine with me. Seriously.

我都接受的真的

We call it "Two people

我们称之为"两个

that are not at all romantically involved."

完全没有恋爱关系的人"

Yeah, I get it. Keepin' it casual, man.

嗯我明白随意点

I can dig, seriously.

我能理解真的

Oh. Simon. Hey, can we talk?

西蒙我们能谈谈吗

I don't have anything to say to you.

我没什么好对你说的

Please, please. I just wanted to say that I was sorry, okay?

拜托了拜托了我只是想说我很抱歉

I didn't know or think

我之前不知道或者说没想到

that people still did shit like that.

大家还会做这种恶心事

And I got in a lot of shit for Homecoming,

返校日我出了个大洋相

and I wanted everyone to focus on something else, you know?

然后我希望大家能把注意力转移到其他事情上

I just didn't think it was gonna be a big thing.

我没想到这事会闹这么大

I don't care if you didn't think that my coming out

我不在乎你是否知道我出柜这件事

was gonna be a big thing, Martin.

会闹得这么大马丁

Look, you don't get to decide that.

听着你无权做这个决定

I'm supposed to be the one that decides

我才是那个应该决定

when and where, and how and who knows and how I get to say it.

何时何地如何向谁出柜的人

That's supposed to be my thing!

那本应该是我的权利

And you took that away from me.

但你却夺走了它

So, well, can you please just get the fuck away from me?

所以能不能请你滚远点

I saw the posts. I know who you are.

我看到了那条帖子我知道你是谁了

Jacques a Dit.

"雅克说"

游戏名

That's what they call Simon Says in France.

法语版的"西蒙说"

Very clever.

很机智

I'm sorry, Simon. I can't do this anymore.

抱歉西蒙我不能继续了

- Please, Blue. - I'm so sorry.

-求你了小蓝 -真的很抱歉

You can't leave me alone. Everything's falling apart.

你不能抛下我一切都分崩离析了

发往该账户的邮件已被永久拒收

永久

I mean, I haven't even talked to her.

我都没和她说上话

I haven't even seen her at school.

也没在学校里看到她

Anyway, I guess I'll see you in class, right?

不管怎样我们课上见吧

- Yeah, totally. - Okay.

-没问题 -好的

Later.

晚点见

- Hey. - Hey, Simon.

-你好 -你好西蒙

Is it you?

是你吗

Are you Blue?

你是小蓝吗

No. No, it's not me. Sorry.

不不是我抱歉

I know you've had a crazy couple days.

我知道过去几天很疯狂

You wanna talk about it?

你想聊聊吗

No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked.

不抱歉我不该问的

- No, don't worry. - Sorry for bothering you.

-不没事的 -抱歉打扰你了

Did you know?

你早就知道了吗

I knew you had a secret.

我知道你有个秘密

I mean, when you were little, you were so carefree.

你小时候是如此的无忧无虑

But these last few years, more and more...

但过去几年你越来越...

it's almost like I could feel you holding your breath.

我几乎能感受到你在屏着呼吸

I wanted to ask you about it, but I...

我想问你的但我...

didn't wanna pry.

我不想刺探你

Maybe I made a mistake.

也许我做错了

No. No, Mom, you...

不不妈妈你...

You didn't make a mistake.

你没做错

Being gay is your thing.

身为同性恋是你的事

There are parts of it you have to go through alone.

这其中有一部分你必须独自经历

I hate that.

我恨这一点

As soon as you came out, you said, "Mom, I'm still me."

你一出柜就说"妈妈我依旧是我"

I need you to hear this.

听好了

You are still you, Simon.

你依旧是你西蒙

And you are still the same son who I love to tease,

你依旧是那个我喜欢戏弄的儿子

and who your father depends on for just about everything.

也依旧是那个你爸爸依赖的儿子

And you're the same brother

也依旧是那个

who always compliments his sister on her food,

不管妹妹做什么都说好吃的哥哥

even when it sucks.

即便实际上很难吃

But you get to exhale now, Simon.

但你现在可以呼吸了西蒙

You get to be more you than you have been...

你可以成为比一直以来的你...

in a very long time.

都更真实的自己

You deserve everything you want.

你理应享受你想要的一切

My boy.

宝贝儿子

Hey, Leah.

你好呀莉亚

- Hey. - What's up?

-你好 -最近怎样

What are you doing?

你在干什么呢

Just going for a run, you know.

准备去跑跑步而已

- Daily ritual. - Yeah, you've never done that.

-日常锻炼 -得了你以前从来没跑过

Have too.

必须跑跑了

But you're wearing jeans.

但你还穿着牛仔裤

They're my running jeans.

这是我的跑步专用牛仔裤

Simon, you're about to pass out.

西蒙你都要晕倒了

Okay, fine. I'm not going for a run.

好吧我不是要去跑步

Hey, Leah. Please, listen.

莉亚求你了听我说

Look, I know, okay?

听着我知道好吗

You didn't want anyone to know you're gay.

你不希望别人知道你是同志

No, that wasn't just it.

不不止是这个原因

I fell in love with someone.

我爱上了一个人

That guy in the emails...

邮件里那个...

I love him.

我爱他

And I knew that if Martin leaked our emails,

我知道如果马丁泄露了我们的邮件

it'd scare him off.

他就会被吓跑

I'm sorry.

对不起

I know what I did was messed up.

我知道我的所作所为很过分

You're my best friend.

你是我最好的朋友

If I'm your best friend,

如果我是你最好的朋友

then why did you come out to Abby and not me?

那你为什么选择对艾比出柜而不是对我

Think it was easier.

觉得那样容易些

I've known Abby for six months,

我和艾比只认识了六个月

and I've known you for 13 years.

但我和你认识了13年了

And I knew that if I told you,

我知道如果我告诉你了

that everything was gonna be different.

一切都会不一样了

I really wanted things to stay the same.

我真的很希望一切照旧

Tell me about this guy you love.

跟我说说那个你喜欢的男生

- You sure? - Yeah.

-你确定吗 -确定

It'll help me kill off Hetero Simon in my mind.

这能帮我消灭我对直男西蒙的念想

- You don't have to kill him off. - He's dead, Si.

-也不必消灭吧 -他已经死了小西

Hacking him up with a mental machete as we speak.

我们边聊我边用意念弯刀攻击他

All right. Fair enough.

好吧行吧

So, I call him Blue.

我叫他小蓝

Hey, Si.

小西

Yeah?

什么事

How long have you known?

你知道多久了

Like, I really started to get it when I was around...

我真正开始觉察到是我在...

thirteen?

13岁的时候

Four years? Four years of...

四年了四年间

eating dinner together,

一起吃晚餐

four years of going to movies together.

四年间一起看电影

Four years of walking Bieber together.

四年间一起遛比伯

I'm sorry.

对不起

I shouldn't have missed it.

我不该毫无察觉的

No. Hey, no, Dad.

不是的不是这样爸

All those stupid jokes...

所有那些白痴玩笑

Well, I know you didn't mean 'em.

我知道你不是故意的

It doesn't matter. I shouldn't have missed it.

这不重要我不该毫无察觉的

But...

但...

in case the message got lost somewhere I just...

我怕你还不清楚我...

I just want you to know that I love you.

我只是希望你知道我爱你

And I'm really proud of you.

你真的让我很骄傲

I wouldn't change anything about you.

我不愿让你改变一丝一毫

Hey. Shit, Dad.

好了爸

Hey, stop crying.

别哭了

I'm trying. I'm trying.

我在努力我在努力

Oh, God.

天啊

Come here.

过来

How's that video for Mom coming?

给妈妈准备的那个视频怎么样了

- Good. - Good, good.

-挺好的 -好好

Good.

那就好

You don't know how to export it, do you?

你不知道怎么拷贝出来对吧

Can you help me with that, please?

能帮下我吗

Yeah.

行

- Okay. - Let's go.

-好吧 -走吧

I thought maybe we could sign up for Grindr together.

我觉得或许我们可以在基达上注册个账号

You don't know what Grindr is, do you?

你不知道基达是干什么的对吗

It's Facebook for gay people.

就是同性恋人群的脸书

Not what it is.

并不是

Ladies and gentlemen,

女士们先生们

I present to you 20 years of bliss.

接下来我要为大家展示20年来的幸福生活

BGM: Shine A Light - BANNERS

Did you guys do this?

是你们做的吗

Simon and I did it, yeah.

西蒙和我做的

- I just helped. - It was mostly me.

-我只是帮了把手 -主要是我的功劳

Yeah, right.

可不是

Really? Really?

真要这样吗

I can't believe you did this.

不敢相信你做了这个视频

I panicked and bought you a watch.

我慌了给你买了块手表

That's okay.

没关系

You can give me somethin' later

你等会可以给我样

that I can't get in the store.

我在商店里买不到的东西

That's really gross.

太恶心了

- Oh, guys, just look. - Sorry, just pay attention.

-好好看 -抱歉认真看

Just look at baby Bieber!

看看宝宝比伯

He was so cute!

它太可爱了

Just look at our baby!

看看我们的宝贝

Dear students of Creekwood High School,

亲爱的溪木镇高中的同学们

As anyone with a half-decent data plan already knows,

所有能上网的人都已经能知道了

a recent post on this very website

这个网站最近有帖子

declared that I was gay.

宣布我是同性恋

The delivery left something to be desired,

虽然这篇稿子不尽如人意

but the message is true.

但内容是真实的

I am... gay.

我确实是同性恋

For a long time, I was killing myself to hide that fact.

很久以来隐瞒这个事实让我备受折磨

I had all these reasons.

我为自己找了各种借口

It was unfair that only gay people had to come out.

只有同性恋需要出柜很不公平

I was sick of change.

我讨厌改变

But the truth is I was just scared.

但事实是我只是害怕了

Come on, Garrett. Let's go!

快加勒特快来

At first I thought it was just a gay thing.

起初我觉得这只是同性恋的烦恼

But then I realized, no matter what,

但后来我明白了不管怎样

announcing who you are to the world is pretty terrifying

向世界宣布自己的身份都非常可怕

because what if the world doesn't like you?

因为万一这个世界不喜欢你怎么办

So, I did whatever I could to keep my secret.

所以我尽可能地保守着自己的秘密

I hurt the best, most important people.

我伤害了我最爱的对我最重要的人

And I want them to know that I'm sorry.

我希望他们知道我很抱歉

I am done being scared.

我已经受够了担惊受怕

I'm done living in a world where I don't get to be who I am.

我受够了活在一个不能做自己的世界中

I deserve a great love story.

我值得拥有一段美妙的爱情故事

Disclaimer, this is about to get romantic as eff,

免责声明接下来的一段十分浪漫

so anyone adverse to gratuitous feelings

所以如果你对这些感情没兴趣

kindly click over to the BuzzFeed quiz

请移步Buzzfeed去做休闲小测试

or resume the porn you paused to read this.

或继续观看你为阅读本文而暂停的黄片

Did you even use the ladder?

这梯子你用上了吗

This guy that I love once wrote

我爱的这个人写道

that he felt like he was stuck on a Ferris wheel.

他觉得他就像被困在了摩天轮上

On top of the world one minute,

前一分钟还在世界之巅

at rock bottom the next.

下一分钟就跌入谷底

That's how I feel now.

我现在也是这种感觉

I couldn't ask for more amazing friends,

我有着世界上最好的朋友

a more understanding family.

最善解人意的家人

But it would all be so much better

但如果有人能和我分享这些

if I had someone to share it with.

就更加完美了

So, Blue...

所以小蓝...

I might not know your name or what you look like.

我可能不知道你叫什么或长什么样子

But I know who you are.

但我知道你是谁

I know you're funny and thoughtful.

我知道你风趣而体贴

That you choose your words carefully

你说的话总是经过深思熟虑

and that they're always perfect.

每个词都恰如其分

And I know that you've been pretending for so long

我知道你已经伪装了太久

it's hard to believe you can stop.

很难做出改变

I get it.

我明白

Like I told you at the very beginning,

就像我一开始对你说的那样

I'm just like you.

我和你一样

- Hi, Simon. - What's up?

-你好西蒙 -好

So, Blue...

所以小蓝...

after the play, Friday at 10:00,

演出后周五十点

you know where I'll be.

你知道我会在哪

No pressure for you to show up, but I hope you do.

我不勉强非要你出现但我希望你会

Because you deserve a great love story too.

因为你也值得拥有一段伟大的爱情故事

Love, Simon.

爱你的西蒙

消息已发布

Okay. They're not paying me enough for this.

好吧这么点工资还得处理这种事

- Hi - Oh, my God.

-你好 -天呐

- Oh, my God! - You were amazing.

-天呐 -你太出色了

I'm not even kidding.

我是真心的

- You were, like, insane. - Thank you!

-你简直太惊艳了 -谢谢

- What's up? - Baby!

-你好啊 -宝贝

Yeah. Yeah.

好好

- Hey, Simon. - Hey.

-你好西蒙 -你好

Do you wanna go to the carnival with us tonight?

今晚你想和我们一起去参加嘉年华吗

Yes.

想

- Yeah? - Yeah!

-好吗 -好

Get in here, Leah!

过来抱抱莉亚

The love!

爱死你了

Thank you.

谢谢

BGM: Wings - HAERTS

We'll be right here.

我们在这等你

- Go get him. - All right.

-去把他拿下 -好

- Yes! - Woo! Yeah!

-棒 -太棒了

Go, Simon!

加油西蒙

Spier, Spier, Spier!

斯皮尔斯皮尔斯皮尔

That should last a while.

这应该能让我坐上几圈了

Oh, my God, look.

老天快看

I bet he's waiting for the other gay kid.

他肯定是在等另一个同性恋小孩

Where's Dana? She'll love this.

德娜呢她会喜欢这场好戏的

You got this, buddy. Proud of you.

你能行的伙计为你骄傲

- Yeah, buddy! - Yeah!

-加油兄弟 -加油

You got it! Woo!

你可以的

This is it.

就是这样

We love you, Simon!

我们爱你西蒙

Yo. Can you just... Come on, no.

你能... 拜托了别这样

Okay. That's your last ride ticket, buddy.

好吧你最后一张票用完了兄弟

Wait. Wait!

等等

Simon, it's me.

西蒙是我

I'm Blue. I love you.

我就是小蓝我爱你

- No, you're not. - No, I'm not. I just...

-不你不是 -对我不是我只是

This is so brutal.

这太残忍了

Here. I'll tell you what.

来这样吧

I got a couple... How much is it?

我这有... 多少钱

- It's four tickets, four bucks. - Perfect. Okay. There you go.

-四张票四块钱 -好的好了给你

Last one's on me.

我请你坐最后一圈

Got it.

坚持住

Last call for the Ferris wheel!

摩天轮马上启程了

Oh, no, I can't watch. I can't watch this, babe. No.

不我看不下去了我看不下去了不

This is awful.

太惨了

- Okay, Dora. - Wait, wait.

-好了朵拉 -等等

Can I sit there?

我能坐这吗

I was kind of waiting for somebody.

我在等别人

Yeah, I know.

我知道

It's Bram!

是布拉姆

It's you.

是你

It's me.

是我

But that night at the party...

但那晚聚会上

Yeah. I was drunk and confused.

是的我喝高了不清醒了

And it ended, like, a minute after you saw us.

你一看到我们我就马上清醒了

And you're Jewish.

你是犹太人

Yeah.

对

Which is cool.

挺好的

And I'm black too.

我还是个黑人

And gay.

还是同性恋

It's kind of crazy, huh?

不可思议吧

I didn't think you'd come.

我还以为你不会来

Me neither.

我也是

Until I was walking towards you, I didn't think I had it in me.

朝你走来之前我都以为自己没这个勇气

Are you disappointed that it's me?

是我你失望吗

No.

不

离毕业还有17天

Have you seen CreekSecrets?

你看了溪木镇树洞了没

There are six new confessions, all signed.

有六篇新的告白全都有署名

Listen to this.

听听这个

"My parents didn't come and see me in Cabaret.

"我父母没来看我《歌厅》的表演

They hate that I wanna be an actor.

他们不支持我当演员

I don't know if they'll ever be proud of me.

我不知道他们会不会为我骄傲

Taylor Metternich."

泰勒·梅特涅"

You're a trendsetter, Spier.

你引领潮流了斯皮尔

Now, come on, get in the car. We need to go.

快上车吧我们要走了

- Good morning! - Ah, there he is!

-早上好 -他来了

- Morning, Simon. - Top of the morning, kid.

-早上好西蒙 -早安孩子

What's this?

这是什么

- Nora's specialty. - Mm, coconut?

-诺拉的招牌菜 -椰子吗

- Yeah. - You look good.

-对了 -你看上去不错

- Have a good day, honey. - You too.

-祝今天愉快亲爱的 -你也是

- Is it good? - It's delicious.

-好吃吗 -很好吃

- I'll see you guys. - What, you're not gonna eat?

-再见 -怎么你不吃吗

Bye, Simon.

再见西蒙

BGM: Wild Heart - Bleachers

- Mornin'. - Mornin', buddy.

-早上好 -早上好兄弟

- Good morning. - Hey! How you doin', Leah?

-早上好 -你好吗莉亚

Pretty good. Pretty good.

挺好的挺好的

- Morning. - Morning.

-早上好 -早上好

Everybody in?

都齐了吗

- Yes. - Oh, yeah.

-齐了 -齐了

All right, it's too beautiful a day,

好吧今天天气真好

so I think I'm gonna actually take us on a little adventure.

所以我想带大家去一趟小小的冒险之旅

Yes!

太好了

That's exactly what I need!

我正想呢

Yeah, adventure!

太棒了冒险

爱你，西蒙 Love, Simon

台词