So if a photon is directed through a plane
with two slits in it and either slit is observed,
it will not go through both slits.
If it's unobserved,it will.
However,if it's observed after it's left the plane
But before it hits its target,
it won't have gone through both slits.
Agreed. what's your point?
There's no point,I just think it's a good idea for a t-shirt.
-excuse me. -hang on.
One across is "aegean."
Eight down is "nabokov."
26 across is "mcm."
14 down is... move your finger...
"phylum" which makes 14 across "port-au-prince"
See,"papa doc's capitol idea," that's "port-au-prince."
你看 "Papa Doc"(海地总统绰号)提示了 所以是"太子港"
-can I help you? -yes.
Is this the high-iq sperm bank?
If you have to ask,maybe you shouldn't be here.
I think this is the place.
-fill these out. -thank you.
-we'll be right back. -take your time.
I'll just finish my crossword puzzle.
Leonard,I don't think I can do this.
What,are you kidding? you're a semi-pro.
No. we are committing genetic fraud.
There's no guarantee that our sperm
is going to generate high-iqOffspring.
Think about that. I have a sister with the same basic dna mix
Who hostesses at fuddruckers.
Sheldon,this was your idea.
A little extra money to get
fractional t-1 bandwidth in the apartment.
I know,and I do yearn for faster downloads.
But there's some poor woman
who's gonna pin her hopes on my sperm.
What if she winds up with a toddler who doesn't know if he should use
An integral or a differential to solve the area under a curve?
-i'm sure she'll still love him. -i wouldn't.
Well,what do you want to do?
What's the protocol for leaving?
I don't know... I've never reneged on a proffer of sperm before.
Let's try just walking out.
-bye. -bye. nice meeting you.
-再见 -再见 很高兴见到你
Are you still mad about the sperm bank?
You want to hear an interesting thing about stairs?
If the height of a single step is off by as little as two millimeters,
-most people will trip. -i don't care.
Two milli... that doesn't seem right.
No,it's true,I did a series of experiments when I was 12
不 是真的 我12岁时做过一系列试验
My father broke his clavicle.
Is that why they sent you to boarding school?
No. that was a result of my work with lasers.
Significant improvement over the old neighbor.
200-pound transvestite with a skin condition?
We don't mean to interrupt. we live across the hall.
We don't live together. I mean...
We live together,
But in separate,heterosexual bedrooms.
Guess I'm your new neighbor. penny.
-leonard. sheldon. -hi.
-我是里奥纳德 他是谢尔顿 -你好
Welcome to the building.
Thank you. maybe we can have coffee sometime.
-well... bye. -bye.
Should we have invited her for lunch?
No.We're gonna start season two of battlestar galactica.
We already watched the season two dvds.
Not with commentary.
I think we should be good neighbors
And invite her over,make her feel welcome.
We never invited louie-slash-louise over.
And that was wrong of us.
We need to widen our circle.
I have a very wide circle.
I have 212 friends on myspace.
Yes,and you've never met one of them.
That's the beauty of it.
I'm gonna invite her over.
We'll have a nice meal and... chat.
Chat? we don't chat. at least not offline.
聊天? 我们平时不聊天 至少下了网不聊
It's not difficult.
You just listen to what she says
And then you say something appropriate in response.
We brought home indian food.
I know that moving can be stressful,
And I find that when I'm undergoing stress,
That good food and company can have a comforting effect.
Also,curry is a natural laxative,and I don't have to tell you
还有 咖喱本身有通便功效 我想我不必再说
That,you know,a clean colon is just...
One less thing to worry about.
I'm no expert,but I believe in the context of a luncheon invitation,
You might want to skip the reference to bowel movements.
You're inviting me over to eat?
Oh,that's so nice. I'd love to.
So,what do you guys do for fun around here?
Today we tried masturbating for money.
By aBu 201705
天才也性感 第1季 第1集
Okay,make yourself at home.
This looks like some serious stuff.
-leonard,did you do this? -actually,that's my work.
-里奥纳德 这是你写的? -不 这是我的
Yeah. well,it's just some quantum mechanics
With a little string theory doodling around the edges.
That part there,that's just a joke.
It's a spoof of the born-oppenheimer approximation.
So you're like one of those beautiful mind genius guys.
-this is really impressive. -i have a board.
If you like boards,this is my board.
If by "holy smokes",you mean
A derivative restatement of the kind of stuff
You can find scribbled on the wall of any men's room at mit,sure.
-what? -come on.
Who hasn't seen this differential below "here I sit,broken-hearted"?
谁没看到那微分上面写着"我打住了 心碎了 算不下去了"
At least I didn't have to invent 26 dimensions
Just to make the math come out.
I didn't invent them. they're there.
-in what universe? -in all of them... that is the point.
Do you guys mind if I start?
That's where l sit.
So,sit next to me.
No... I sit there.
What's the difference?
-what's the difference? -here we go.
In the winter,that seat is close enough to the radiator
To remain warm,and yet not so close as to cause perspiration
In the summer,it's directly in the path of a cross-breeze
Created by opening windows there and there.
It faces the television at an angle
That is neither direct,thus discouraging conversation,
Nor so far wide as to create a parallax distortion.
I could go on,but I think I've made my point.
Do you want me to move?
-well... -just sit somewhere else.
We don't have a lot of company over.
That's not true. koothrappali and wolowitz come over all the time.
-yes i know,but... -tuesday night,
-是 我知道 但... -星期二晚上
We played klingon boggle till 1:00 a.m.
-don't say we don't have company. -sorry.
-that has negative social implications. -i said I'm sorry!
Yeah. it's like regular boggle,but...
是的 就是普通的拼字游戏 只不过...
That's probably enough about us. so,tell us about you.
I'm a sagittarius,
Which probably tells you way more than you need to know.
Yes. it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion
That the sun's apparent position
Relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth
Somehow affects your personality.
Participate in the what?
I think what sheldon's trying to say
Is that sagittarius wouldn't have been our first guess.
Yeah,a lot of people think I'm a water sign.
Okay,let's see,what else.
I'm a vegetarian. except for fish.
And the occasional steak. I love steak!
Leonard can't process corn.
Well... do you have some sort of a job?
Yeah. I'm a waitress at the cheesecake factory.
I love cheesecake.
I don't eat it... I just think it's a good idea.
Anyways,I'm also writing a screenplay.
It's about this sensitive girl who comes to l.a. from lincoln,nebraska,
To be an actress and winds up a waitress at the cheesecake factory.
So,it's based on your life.
No,I'm from omaha.
If that was movie,I would go see it.
Okay,let's see,what else...
Guess that's about it.
That's the story of penny.
Until I fell in love with a jerk!
God,you know,4 years I lived with him.
上帝 你知道吗 我和他同居了4年
4 years... that's like as long as high school.
It took you 4 years to get through high school?
It just... I can't believe I trusted him.
Should I say something? I feel like I should say something.
You? no,you'll only make it worse.
你? 算了 你只会越帮越忙
You want to know the most pathetic part?
Even though I hate his lying,cheating guts...
No,it's not crazy. it's a...
不 不是的 这只是...
Paradoxes are part of nature. think about light.
If you look at huygens,light is a wave,
As confirmed by the double-slit experiments,
But then along comes albert einstein
And discovers that light behaves like particles,too.
Well,I didn't make it worse.
I'm so sorry. I'm such a mess.
On top of everything else,I'm all gross from moving
And my stupid shower doesn't even work.
Our shower works.
Really? would it be totally weird if I used it?
It's right down the hall.
You guys are really sweet.
Well,this is an interesting development.
It has been some time since we've had a woman
Take her clothes off in our apartment.
That's not true. remember at thanksgiving,
My grandmother with alzheimer's had that episode?
Point taken. it has been some time
Since we've had a woman take her clothes off,
After which we didn't want to rip our eyes out.
The worst part was watching her carve that turkey.
So what exactly are you trying to accomplish here?
That woman is not going to have sex with you.
I'm not trying to have sex with her.
Good. then you won't be disappointed.
What makes you think she wouldn't have sex with me?
I'm a male and she's a female.
Yes,but not of the same species.
I'm not going to engage in hypotheticals here.
I'm just trying to be a good neighbor.
That's not to say that if a carnal relationship were to develop,
That I wouldn't participate.
Do you think this possibility will be helped or hindered
When she discovers your luke skywalker no-more-tears shampoo?
It's darth vader shampoo.
Luke skywalker's the conditioner.
-wait till you see this. -it's fantastic,unbelievable.
-先看这个 -太强了 难以置信
It's a stephen hawking lecture from mit in 1974.
This isn't a good time.
It's before he became a creepy computer voice.
-that's great. you guys have to go. -why?
-不错 可你们现在必须得走 -为什么
It's just not a good time.
Leonard has a lady over.
Yeah,right... your grandmother back in town?
No. And she's not a lady. she's just a new neighbor.
不是 她不是什么女士 她是新来的邻居
Hang on,there really is a lady here?
And you want us out because you're anticipating coitus?
I'm not anticipating coitus.
So she's available for coitus?
Can we please just stop saying "coitus"?
Technically,that would be"coitus interruptus. "
Hey,is there a trick to getting it to switch from tub to shower...?
Hi. sorry. hello.
Howard wolowitz,caltech department of applied physics.
You may be familiar with some of my work.
It's currently orbiting jupiter's largest moon
Taking high-resolution digital photographs.
Penny. I work at the cheesecake factory.
I'll show you the trick with the shower.
"Bonne douche" Bonne douche.
It's french for "good shower. "
It's a sentiment I can express in six languages.
Save it for your blog,howard.
All right,there it goes. it sticks. I'm sorry.
好了 没问题了 是卡住了 不好意思
-okay,thanks. -you're welcome.
-好的 谢谢 -不用谢
You're just gonna to step right... okay,I'll...
你只要站在... 好吧 我...
-hey,leonard? -the hair products are sheldon's.
-等等 里奥纳德 -洗头的那些东西都是谢尔顿的
Can I ask you a favor?
Sure,you can ask me a favor. I would do you a favor for you.
当然 你可以让我帮你忙 我可以帮你个忙
It's okay if you say no.
I'll probably say yes.
It's just not the kind of thing you ask a guy you just met.
I really think we should examine the chain of causality here.
-must we? -event a...
A beautiful woman stands naked in our shower.
Event b... we drive halfway across town to retrieve a television set
From the aforementioned woman's ex-boyfriend.
Query... on what plane of existence
Is there even a semi-rational link between these events?
She asked me to do her a favor,sheldon.
Yes,well,that may be the proximal cause of our journey,
But we both know it only exists in contradistinction
To the higher level distal cause.
-which is? -you think with your penis.
That's a biological impossibility. and you didn't have to come.
从生理上说这是不可能的 还有 你可以不用跟来啊
Right,I could have stayed behind and watch wolowitz try to hit on penny
In russian,arabic and farsi.
用俄语 阿拉伯语 波斯语
Why can't she get her own tv?
Come on,you know how it is with breakups.
No,I don't... and neither do you.
I broke up with joyce kim.
You did not break up with joyce kim. she defected to north korea.
To mend her broken heart.
This situation is much less complicated.
There's some kind of dispute between penny and her ex-boyfriend
As to who gets custody of the tv.
She just wanted to avoid having a scene with him.
-so we get to have a scene with him? -no,there's not going to be a scene.
-所以我们去和他大吵大闹 -不 我们不用和他去吵的
There's two of us and one of him.
Leonard,the two of us can't even carry a tv.
So,you guys work with leonard and sheldon at the university?
I'm sorry,do you speak english?
He speaks english. he just can't speak to women.
He's kind of a nerd.
I'll do the talking.
-yeah? -hi,I'm leonard,this is sheldon.
-谁? -你好 我是里奥纳德 这是谢尔顿
-hello. -what did I just--
-we're here to pick up penny's tv. -get lost.
Okay,thanks for you time.
We're not going to give up just like that.
Leonard,the tv's in the building.
We've been denied access to the building,ergo,we are done.
我们已经被阻止进入大楼了 因此 我们没戏了
Excuse me. if I were to give up on the first little hitch,
I never would have identified the fingerprints of string theory
In the aftermath of the big bang.
My apologies. what's your plan?
It's just a privilege to watch your mind at work.
Come on,we have a combined iq of 360.
We should be able to figure out how to get into a stupid building.
What do you think their combined iq is?
Just grab the door!
I'll do the talking.
Good thinking. I'll just be the muscle.
I'm leonard,this is sheldon.
From the intercom.
How the hell did you get in the building?
Tell him about our iq.
-my mom bought me those pants. -i'm sorry.
You're going to have to call her.
Sheldon,I am so sorry I dragged you through this.
谢尔顿 拖你下水了 真的很抱歉
It's okay. it wasn't my first pantsing and it won't be my last.
没关系 这不是我的第一条裤子 也不会是最后一条
And you were right about my motives.
I was hoping to establish a relationship with penny
That might have someday led to sex.
Well,you got me out of my pants.
Anyway,I've learned my lesson.
She's out of my league,I'm done with her.
Got my work,one day I'll win the nobel prize
And then I'll die alone.
Don't think like that. you're not going to die alone.
Thank you,sheldon. you're a good friend.
谢谢 谢尔顿 你真是好朋友
And you're certainly not going to win a nobel prize.
This is one of my favorite places to kick back after a quest.
They have a great house ale.
Yeah,I've had him since level ten.
His name is buttons.
Anyway,if you had your own game character
We could hang out,maybe go on a quest.
That sounds interesting.
You'll think about it?
I don't think I'll be able to stop thinking about it.
My god,what happened?
Well,your ex-boyfriend sends his regards
And I think the rest is fairly self-explanatory.
I'm so sorry. I really thought if you guys went instead of me
He wouldn't be such an ass.
No,it was a valid hypothesis.
That was a valid...? what is happening to you?
Really,thank you so much for going and trying,you're just...
真的 你们这么努力 这么帮忙 真是太谢谢了
You're so terrific. really.
Why don't you put some clothes on,
I'll get my purse,and dinner is on me,okay?
我去拿我的包 晚饭我请 好吗?
-really? great. -thank you.
-真的? 好啊 -谢谢
You're not done with her,are you?
Are babies will be smart and beautiful.
Not to mention imaginary.
-is thai food okay with you,penny? -sure.
-潘妮 你觉得泰国菜如何 -可以啊
We can't have thai food,
-we had indian for lunch. -so?
-they're both curry-based cuisines. -so?
It would be gastronomically redundant.
I can see we're going to have to spell out everything for this girl.
Turn left on lake street and head up to colorado.
I know a wonderful little sushi bar that has karaoke.
That sounds like fun.
baby don't get hook up on me
baby don't get hook up on me
I don't know what your odds are in the world as a whole,
But as far as the population of this car goes,