No, see, the liquid-metal terminators were created
不 你想 液态金属终结者
In the future by skynet,
And skynet was developed by miles dyson,
But that future no longer exists
Due to dyson's death in terminator 2.
Okay,read only this.
Assuming all the good terminators
Were originally evil terminators created by skynet
But then reprogrammed by the future john connor,
Why would skynet, an artificial computer intelligence,
Bother to create a petite, hot, 17-year-old killer robot?
Skynet is kinky?
Artificial intelligences do not have teen fetishes.
All right. Wait! they use it to...
好吧 等等 其实他们是想用它...
What the hell is that?
I don't know, but if cats could sing...
They'd hate it, too.
Hi! where you going?
We just had to mail some letters and...
Throw away some chicken.
You'll never guess what just happened.
As a scientist, I reach conclusions
Based on observation and experimentation...
Although as I'm saying this,
It occurs to me you may have been employing
A rhetorical device rendering my response moot.
Believe it or not, personal growth.
All right, remember when I auditioned for that workshop
Production of rent, but I didn't get it
And I couldn't figure out why.
I have a conclusion based on an observation.
Well, the girl they picked to play mimi--
She dropped out, and they asked me to replace her.
Congratulations. what a lucky break.
It's not that big a deal, just a one-night showcase,
But they invite a lot of casting people and agents.
So, you never know.
I think I know. no, you don't.
-我想我知道 -不 你不知道
It's this friday night at 8:00. you guys want to come?
Friday we are attending a symposium
On molecular positronium.
I think that's a week from tuesday,at 6:00.
No, it's this friday.
Well, I gotta get to rehearsal.
See you guys. see ya.
-再见了 伙计们 -再见
You just lied to penny.
Yes, I did. and you did it
-是 我撒了谎 -而且你表现得
So casually-- no rapid breathing,
No increase in perspiration...
So, lack of a physiological response while lying
Is characteristic of a violent sociopath.
Sheldon, are you worried about your safety?
No, I imagine if you were going to kill me,
You'd have done it a long time ago.
By aBu 201705
天才也性感 第一季 第10集
I need to speak to you.
It's 2:00 in the morning!
I highly doubt that.
Are you still out there?
You're right; it can wait until morning.
What, what, what, what, what?
什么 什么 什么 什么 什么
I clearly woke you up in the middle of a rem cycle.
You're in no state of mind to talk.
Sheldon, what is it?
I'm uncomfortable having been included in your lie to penny.
What was I supposed to say?
You could have told her the truth.
That would have hurt her feelings.
Is that a relevant factor?
Then I suppose you could've agreed to go.
And what would I have said afterwards?
I would suggest something to be a fact of
Singing is neither an appropriate vocation
Nor avocation for you, and if you disagree,
I'd recommend you have a cat scan
To look for a tumor pressing
On the cognitive processing centers of your brain.
I couldn't say that.
I would have to say, "you were terrific
And I can't wait to hear you sing again."
That's the social protocol.
It's what you do when you have a friend
Who's proud of something they really suck at.
I was not aware of that.
Well, now you are. oh.
All right. leonard?
When we played chess earlier,
You were terrific, and I can't wait to play you again.
This would be so much easier
If I were a violent sociopath.
I was analyzing our lie, and I believe we're in danger
Of penny seeing through the ruse.
Simple, If she were to log onto
Click on "upcoming events," scroll down to "seminars,"
Download the pdf schedule,
And look for the seminar on molecular positronium,
Our pants are metaphorically on fire.
Well, sir, my trousers will not be igniting today.
好吧 先生 我今天不会让火烧到我屁股的
Do you have any idea what time it is?
My watch is linked to the atomic clock
In boulder, colorado.
It's accurate to one-tenth of a second.
But as I'm saying this, it occurs to me
That, once again, your question may have been rhetorical.
Remember how leonard told you
We couldn't come to your performance
Because we were attending a symposium
On molecular positronium?
I remember "symposium."
Yes. well... he lied.
And I'm feeling very uncomfortable about it.
Well, imagine how I'm feeling.
I'm sorry, this really isn't my strong suit.
You told her I lied?
Why would you tell her I lied?
I'm sorry, I'm not seeing the help.
She was going to see through your lie eventually,
So I told her that you were lying to protect me.
所以 为了保护我 我告诉她你撒了谎
Ohh... I'm getting a bad feeling.
I'm sorry, I'm really not very good at this.
Penny now believes that, on friday night,
We're going to participate
In my cousin leopold's drug intervention.
Your cousin leopold.
Who most people call leo, but he also answers to lee.
Remember that. it's important.
Details, leonard-- the success
Or failure of our deceitful enterprise
Turns on details.
Do you have a cousin leopold? no.
I think you'd call him lee.
I already told her a lie.
Why replace it with a different lie?
Well, first of all, your lie was laughably transparent,
Where mine is exquisitely convoluted.
While you were sleeping,
I was weaving an un-unravelable web.
If she googles "leopold houston,"
She'll find a facebook page,
An online blog depicting his descent into drug use
And a desperate yet hopeful listing on eharmony.com.
Okay, why would I go
To a drug intervention for your cousin?
Ah! because it's in long beach, and I don't drive.
We're going to long beach?
No, of course not. there's no cousin leo.
不 当然不 根本就没有表弟里奥
There's no intervention.
We just leave the house on friday night and we return
In the wee hours, emotionally wrung out,
From the work of convincing leo to go back into rehab.
He goes back into rehab?
Yes, but, he can relapse if penny
没错 并且 要是潘妮再邀请我们听她唱歌
Ever invites us to hear her sing again.
You still told her I lied.
For a noble purpose-- to spare me
The social embarrassment
Of having a drug-addled first cousin--
Which I'm assuming is embarrassing, yes?
How am I supposed to remember all of this?
Oh, that's the best part. you don't have to.
See, I told penny that you would be embarrassed
If you knew that she found out that you had lied,
So she's agreed to operate
As if the original lie is still in force.
So she's expecting me to lie about going
To a symposium in pasadena,
When, in actuality, we're pretending
To go to a drug intervention in long beach.
Wow, look at you, all ready for your showcase.
You look great. thanks.
I just wanted to come by and wish you guys luck
With your... symposium.
You know, I got to tell you, a lot of friends
Would let their friend go alone,
But that's not who you are.
You are the kind of guy who stands by a friend
When... when he has a symposium to go to.
I don't know what to say.
It's okay, leonard.
Oh, okay, all right, good.
哦 好的 不错
Oh, boy, group hug. uh-uh.
Well, penny is on her way to perform
In a one-night showcase production of rent,
Which we are unable to attend, because we're going
To a symposium on molecular positronium
Given by dr. emil farmanfarmian.
Wait a minute-- farmanfarmian is speaking
And you're bogarting the symposium?
Howard, I'm sorr... we-we...
No, no, you're quark-blocking us.
不 不 你们保密到连夸克都透不过
I don't know what to say.
Howard, listen... no, it's okay.
-霍华德 听着... -不 没关系
It's your millennium falcon.
You and chewbacca do whatever you want to do.
Me and princess leia here
Will find some other way to spend the evening.
Howard, wait. wai...
Sheldon, I think we should tell them.
I don't see a problem with that.
There's no symposium.
Leonard lied to me. isn't that right, leonard?
里奥纳德跟我撒了谎 是不是 里奥纳德?
I don't know what to say!
Look, leonard is helping sheldon through a family crisis.
He made up the whole story about the symposium
With dr. farman... farmian...
...because he didn't want sheldon to be embarrassed.
And there is nothing to be embarrassed about, okay?
Every family in america has a relative
Holed up in a garage somewhere huffing paint thinner.
No, I'm lost, too.
I think she skipped a step.
Sheldon's cousin leo escaped rehab,
And he's in a motel 8 in long beach.
The whole family's going out for an intervention.
Leonard is driving sheldon down there
To help him through this, because he's such a good man.
Oh, another hug? thank you.
All right, you guys, good luck.
好了 朋友们 祝你们好运
So, road trip to long beach.
No. we're not going to long beach.
Because sheldon doesn't have
A drug-addicted cousin leopold.
I've always wanted to go to long beach.
It's a very nice community.
The queen mary is docked there.
Once the largest ocean liner in the world,
It's now a hotel and restaurant,
Where they host a surprisingly gripping
Murder mystery dinner.
Sounds fun. I'm game.
Leonard gets nauseous unless he sits in front,
And even then, it's iffy.
Wait, are we... really going to long beach?!
Let it go, sheldon.
The murderer was the first mate
Whether it makes sense to you or not.
No, that's the least of our worries.
I've been doing some research on addiction--
Both the biochemical and behavioral aspects--
And I think there's a problem
With the current version of our lie.
What are you talking about?
It's fine-- she bought it; it's over.
无所谓了 她相信了 都结束了
Sadly, it's not.
Substance abuse is a lifelong struggle,
But beyond that, I have realized that the leo I described
Would not have agreed to go to rehab.
Because leo's a middle child.
There is no leo!
How can you say that?
You didn't read the bio, did you?
He's not just a middle child,
He is the quintessential middle child--
From a broken home, to boot.
Psychologically speaking, the attention he gets by rebelling,
Even to the point of self-destruction,
Is more emotionally valuable than the help he would get at rehab.
I've got a solution.
Great. what is it?
I've hesitated to point this out,
But I must now remind you that we
Are in our current predicament because of your initial
And totally inadequate deceit.
I'm just trying to clean up after your mess.
We'll talk in the morning.
I am sheldon's cousin leo.
Sheldon does not have a cousin leo.
I'm originally from... denton, texas,
But I was a navy brat, so I was
Brought up on a variety of military bases around the world.
As a result, I've often felt like an outsider--
Never really fitting in,
Which is probably the reason for my substance abuse problem.
Excuse me, we just went over this.
As the quintessential middle child, your addiction
Is rooted in your unmet need for attention.
Oh, sheldon, are we really going to go with pop psychology?
For your information, this is all based on solid research.
Just stick with the character profile I wrote for you.
Sheldon? I'm sorry.
Leonard, this is toby loobenfeld.
He's a research assistant
In the particle physics lab,
But he also minored in theater at mit.
It was more of a double major, actually.
Theater and physics.
You can guess which one my bourgeois parents
You see, while leo would not have gone into rehab,
It is completely plauible that we would have talked him
Into leaving the motel and coming home with us.
Oh... sheldon, how about this
As my motivation-- when I was 14 years old,
I was abused in the philippines by a clubfooted navy chaplain.
No. we're going with middle child
And a genetic predisposition to inadequate serotonin production.
Swell. how do I play genetic predisposition?
Subtextually, of course.
Just have fun with it.
Hi. how did the intervention go?
Unfortunately, we weren't able to convince him to go to rehab.
Oh. well, based on what you told me, I am not surprised.
But we did convince him to leave the motel.
Leo. this is penny,
Our friend and neighbor.
How are you feeling?
Let me ask you something, penny.
Have you ever woken up in a fleabag motel
Covered in your own vomit,
Next to a transsexual prostitute?
Then don't ask me how I'm feeling.
Why don't you tell me about your showcase last night.
Oh. it was okay, I guess.
It wasn't a big turnout,
But they both really seemed to like it.
There were only two people there?
By the end, yeah.
Damn you, chaplain harrigan!
I'm... I'm sorry?
The subic bay naval station.
A young boy on the cusp of manhood.
His only companions,
Mongrel dogs and malarial mosquitoes.
Desperate and alone,
He reached out to a man who promised to introduce him
To a merciful, loving god,
But who instead introduced him
To a gin-pickled tongue shoved down his adolescent throat.
What choice did he have but to drink,
Shoot and snort his pain away?
Don't forget his genetic predisposition towards addiction.
That's never been proven. there have been studies.
Not double-blind studies.
How could there be a double-blind study?
Who would be the control group?
As you can see, detoxing can get pretty ugly.
Let's give them some privacy.
Hey, do you want to come over to my place, have coffee?
I have a video of me singing last night.
Do you want to see it?
Gee, why wouldn't i?
This is even better than you coming to the showcase,
Because now I get to watch you watch me.
Funny how things work out.
...but he loved the companionship
And the wisdom that his own father failed to provide.
Your parents made the right decision.
I cannot work like this.
Just sitting on a couch watching tv with a woman.
Not being drunk or, or high
Or wondering if you're a dude down there.
Leo, you are a very sweet, really funny guy.
You're going to do okay.
One day at a time, penny.
One day at a time.
How long is he going to stay here?
He's a homeless drug addict, leonard.
Where is he going to go?
Boy, you have a lot to learn about lying.