On the other hand, some physicists are concerned
That if this supercollider actually works,
It'll create a black hole and swallow up the earth,
Ending life as we know it.
Pfft, what a bunch of crybabies.
No guts, no glory, man.
Hey, check it out.
The school of pharmacology is looking for volunteers.
"we are testing a new medication "for social anxiety, panic attacks,
Agoraphobia and obsessive compulsive disorder."
Why would they be looking for test subjects here?
I don't know, raj.
Maybe the comic book store doesn't have a bulletin board.
Shh, shh, hot girl in sheldon's office.
嘘 嘘 谢尔顿办公室有个靓妹
I followed her here from the parking lot.
Maybe she's his lawyer.
Well, she's free to examine my briefs.
Howard. I know, I'm disgusting.
-霍华德 -我知道 我很恶心
I should be punished... by her.
Oh, look, I did it again.
That should do it.
Thank you for coming by.
Oh, hey, buddy...
Sorry I'm late.
I'm working on a project that may take me up on the next space shuttle.
How can you be late?
I wasn't expecting you at all.
Nobody ever expects me.
Sometimes you just look and...
Bam! howard wolowitz.
Sheldon, are you gonna introduce us?
Oh, all right. uh, this is missy.
Missy, this is leonard and rajesh, and you've already met howard.
米茜 这是里奥纳德和拉杰 你已经见过霍华德了
It's nice to meet you.
You, too, as well, also.
你也是 也 也是
So, how do you two know each other?
Oh, he once spent nine months with my legs wrapped around his head.
She's my twin sister.
She thinks she's funny, but frankly, I've never been able to see it.
她以为自己很风趣 但说实话 我从来看不出
That's because you have no measurable sense of humor, shelly.
How exactly would one measure a sense of humor?
Well, I think you're delightfully droll.
Ooor, as the french say, tres drole. okay, so let me see if I got this.
-当然 就像法语中 "你真有趣" -看我记不记得住
Leonard, howard and...
里奥纳德 霍华德 还有...
I'm sorry, what was your name again?
By aBu 201705
天才也性感 第一季 第15集
So, missy, what brings you all the way from texas?
那么 米茜 你为什么从德州跑到这来?
Was it perhaps destiny? I think it was destiny.
My friend's s getting married at disneyland tomorrow night.
Destiny, thy name is anaheim.
And I had to drop off some papers for shelly to sign for my dad's estate.
The papers could've been mailed.
Mom just sent you here to spy on me, didn't she?
I guess that's why they call you a genius.
They call me a genius because I'm a genius.
Tell mom that I currently weigh 165 pounds
And that I'm having regular bowel movements.
Enjoy the wedding. good-bye.
If the wedding's not until tomorrow, why don't you stay with us tonight?
Oh, I don't think so.
Shelly doesn't like company.
Even as a little boy,
He'd send his imaginary friends home at the end of the day.
They were not friends.
They were imaginary colleagues.
Look, you're here.
We have plenty of room.
Come on, shelly. she's family.
别这样 谢利 她是家人啊
So what, I don't issue invitations to your mother.
Well, it would be nice not to have to drive to anaheim in rush hour.
And don't ever call me shelly.
So it's settled. You'll stay with us.
Yeah, I'll walk you to your car.
You're in structure 3, level c, right?
你车停在3区 c层 没错吧
What just happened?
We're eight years old and sheldon converts my
Easy bake oven to some kind of high-powered furnace.
I needed a place to fire ceramic
Semiconductor substrates for homemade integrated circuits.
He was trying to build some sort of
Armed robot to keep me out of his room.
Made necessary by her insistence on going into my room.
Anyway, I go to make those little corn muffins they give you.
There's a big flash.
Next thing you know my eyebrows are gone.
I had to go through the entire second
Grade with crooked eyebrows my mom drew on.
Is that what that was?
I just assumed that the second grade
Curriculum had rendered you quizzical.
Hey, leonard, you left your underwear in the dryer downstairs.
Those are not mine.
They have your little name label in them.
Yeah... no, I do... i...
I use those, uh, just to polish up my spearfishing equipment.
When I'm not crossbow hunting, I spearfish.
Uh, penny, this is sheldon's twin sister, missy.
潘妮 这是谢尔顿的孪生妹妹 米茜
Missy, this is our neighbor penny. don't look that much alike.
-米茜 这是我们的邻居潘妮 -你们看起来长得不像啊
Can I get a hallelujah?
Fraternal twins come from two separate eggs.
They are no more alike than any other siblings.
I've been accepted as a test subject for a
New miracle drug to overcome pathological shyness.
Oh, good for you, raj.
Yes, I'm very hopeful. hello, missy.
是 我有希望了 你好 米茜
They mentioned there may be side effects.
So, missy, have you ever met a man from the exotic subcontinent of india?
Well, there's dr. patel at our church.
Ah, yes, patel-- good man.
没错 帕特尔 他人不错
Do you like motorcycles?
'cause I ride a hog.
You have a two-cylinder scooter with a basket in the front.
You still have to wear a helmet.
Have you ever heard of the kama sutra?
The indian sex book.
In other words, if you "wonder, wonder who wrote the book of love,
So, sheldon's sister is pretty cute, huh?
I wasn't staring.
I didn't say you were. I just said she was cute.
Oh, eh... maybe, if you like women who are tall...
Sheldon, why are you ignoring your sister?
I'm not ignoring my sister. I'm ignoring all of you.
Oh, my, gherkins and...
Onion dip. it's onion dip.
We don't entertain much.
Do you enjoy pajamas?
Yeah, we indians invented them.
Yeah, well, my people invented circumcision.
Missy, I'm gonna go get my nails done.
Do you want to come?
God, yes. thanks.
太好了 我去 谢谢你
Bye, guys. bye, missy.
-大伙再见 -再见 米茜
Bye, missy, see you. good-bye, leonard.
-米茜 再见 -再见 里奥纳德
Oh, yeah, no, uh, bye, penny.
Okay, you two have to back off.
Why should I back off? you back off, dude.
我干吗要闪开 你闪开 伙计
Excuse me, this is my apartment, and she's my roommate's sister.
不好意思 这是我的房子 她是我室友的妹妹
So what? you've already got penny!
How do I have penny?
In what universe do I have penny?
So I can have penny?
Excuse me. can I interject something?
I'm ordering pizza online.
Is everyone okay with pepperoni?
Sheldon, can I talk to you in private?
Don't worry. I was going to order you cheese-less.
Thank you. it's okay.
Lactose intolerance is nothing to be embarrassed about.
I'm a fancy indian man.
We invented pajamas.
Hey, look at me. I don't have a foreskin.
Are you aware that your sister is an incredibly attractive woman?
She certainly has the symmetry and low
Body fat that western culture deems desirable.
It's noteworthy, at other points in history,
Heavier women were the standard for
Beauty because their girth suggested affluence.
That's fascinating, but...
I didn't say it was fascinating. I said it was noteworthy.
All right... noted.
But my point is that koothrappali and wolowitz,
They're hitting on your sister.
You know, I don't want to criticize your rhetorical style,
But we'd be a lot further along in this
Conversation if you'd begun with that thought.
That's great, but my...
What I'm saying is that we took quite an Unnecessary detour
from what I now understand to be your thesis.
You have to do something about it.
Because she's your sister.
Yes, we shared a uterus for nine months,
But since then we've pretty much gone our own separate ways.
Okay, uh, consider this...
With your father gone,
It is your responsibility to make sure that missy chooses a suitable mate.
I hadn't considered that.
We do share dna. uh-huh.
So there is the possibility, however remote,
That resting in her loins is the potential
For another individual as remarkable as myself.
And you owe it to yourself and to posterity to protect
The genetic integrity of your sister's future offspring.
If someone wants to get at missy's fallopian tubes,
They'll have to go through me.
I am shiva the destroyer!
I will have the woman.
I'm warning you I was judo champion at math camp.
All right, now that's enough juvenile squabbling.
I'm going to settle this right now.
Neither of you are good enough for my sister.
Who are you to decide that?
He's the man of his family.
You have to respect his wishes.
You're out, too, by the way. say what?
-顺便说一句 你也出局了 -你说什么?
It's nothing personal.
I'd just prefer if my future niece or nephew
Didn't become flatulent every time they ate an eskimo pie.
What are you so happy about?
It's the medication. I can't stop smiling.
That leonard's made me aware of how high the genetic stakes are,
We have to face the fact that none
Of you are suitable mates for my sister.
Leonard made you aware of that?
We all make mistakes. let's move on.
Excuse me, but I think you're missing a big opportunity here.
Everybody knows genetic diversity produces the strongest offspring.
Why not put a little mocha in the family latte?
In principle, you have a point.
But as a practical matter,
Need I remind you that it takes experimental
Pharmaceuticals to simply enable you to speak to the opposite sex.
I think you're focusing entirely too much on the drugs.
Is it 'cause I'm jewish?
'cause I'd kill my rabbi with a pork chop to be with your sister.
This has nothing to do with religion.
This has to do with the fact that you're a tiny,
Tiny man who still lives with his mother.
Sheldon, you are really being unreasonable.
Here, eat this cheese without farting and you can sleep with my sister.
来 吃了这片芝士能不放屁 你就可以和我妹上床
Shelly, can I speak to you for a minute?
Why does everyone suddenly want to talk to me alone?
Usually nobody wants to be alone with me.
We all make mistakes. let's move on.
Okay, I'm not even going to ask why you're pimping me out for cheese.
But since when do you care at all about who I sleep with?
Well, truthfully, I've never given it any thought,
But it has been pointed out to me that you carry dna of great potential.
What on earth are you talking about?
You see, I'm a superior genetic mutation, uh,
An improvement on the existing mediocre stock.
And what do you mean, "mediocre stock"?
But residing within you, is the potential for another me.
Perhaps even taller, smarter, and less prone to freckling, a sheldon 2.0,
一个可能更高 更聪明 雀斑更少的 谢尔顿2.0
I am not saying that I should be the sole decider of who you mate with.
If you're not attracted to the suitor,
Then the likelihood of conception will be reduced.
You have got to be kidding me.
Frequent coitus dramatically increases the odds of fertilization.
Okay, shelly, sit down.
好了 谢利 坐下
Now I've lived my whole life dealing with the fact that my twin
Brother is, as mom puts it, "one of god's special, little people."
I always thought I was more like a cuckoo bird.
A superior creature whose egg is placed in the nest of ordinary birds.
Of course, the newly hatched cuckoo eats all the food,
Leaving the ordinary siblings to starve to death.
Luckily for you, that's where the metaphor ended.
I thought it ended at "cuckoo."
If you want to start acting like a brother who cares about me,
But you try one time to tell me who I should be sleeping with,
And you and I are going to go round and
Round the way we did when we were little.
I have an alternate proposal. go on.
We will place them in cryogenic storage.
I will find an appropriate sperm donor for your eggs,
Have them fertilized and implanted in you.
That way, everybody wins.
Missy can date whoever she wants.
Look, we have to settle this.
Sheldon's sister is hiding at penny's because
We've all been hitting on her at the same time.
She needed privacy to call her grandmother who's apparently very sick.
Oh, and then I believe she has to wash her hair.
Oh, you poor, deluded bastard.
Don't start with me, dude.
You want to go again? let's go.
If we're going to fight over missy, let's do it the right way.
You want some more?
Come on, come on! get up!
Stay down, bitch!
Yeah! natural selection at work.
I weep for humanity.
Excuse me while I go tell missy the good news.
Hey, leonard. oh, hi, penny.
-好啊 里奥纳德 -好啊 潘妮
Listen, that guy mike that you were dating, is that still going on?
对了 你约会的那个对象麦克 现在还好着吗
Uh, pretty much. why?
Nothing, just catching up.
By the way, may I speak to missy, please?
Hi, leonard. what's up?
好啊 里奥纳德 什么事
Well, since you're leaving tomorrow,
I was wondering if you'd like to go to dinner with me.
Oh. do you have other plans or...?
Enjoy the rest of your evening.
Um, here's something we didn't anticipate.
What do you want, howard?
I'm fine. thanks for asking.
I've come to call on missy.
The amazing howard.
Then you are in for a treat.
Behold, an ordinary cane.
Is your medication wearing off?
Well, hi, cutie pie.
I was hoping you'd show up.
We had a dog who made a noise like that.
Had to put him down.
Any news you want me to pass along to mom?
She might be interested to know that I have refocused my research
From bosonic string theory to heterotic string theory.
Yeah, I'll just tell her you say "hey."
Okay, well, it was pleasant seeing you,
Other than that business with my testicles.
I want you to know I'm very proud of you.
Yep, I'm always bragging to my friends about my brother,
The rocket scientist.
You tell people I'm a rocket scientist?
I'm a theoretical physicist.
What's the difference?
What's the difference?!
Why don't you just tell them that
I'm a toll-taker at the golden gate bridge?!
Rocket scientist. how humiliating.