- Rach, come on. - Come on.
- 瑞秋 别这样 - 快点
It's your birthday.
She's not as pretty as she was when she was 29.
Ms. Green wants to establish some ground rules before she comes out.
She would appreciate it if you didn't use the words "old" or "downhill"...
...or "They still look pretty damn good."
Rachel, come on out.
Monica made breakfast.
Chocolate chip pancakes.
We've got presents.
They all came from the list you handed out to us two weeks ago.
Well, can I keep the presents and still be 29?
Come on, Rach, look, turning 30 is not that big a deal.
Oh, really? Is that how you felt when you turned 30?
Why, God, why?
为什么 上帝 为什么？
We had a deal. Let the others grow old, not me.
我们讲好的了 让其他人变老 我不要
Oh, come on, you guys, is it just me? Am I overreacting?
No, Rach, it is not just you. My 30th birthday certainly wasn't that much fun.
不 不是只有你 我的30岁生日也不好过
We're all getting so old.
Why are you doing this to us?
Rach, you're in a great place in your life. You have an amazing job, good friends.
你的生活过得很好 你有很棒的工作 很好的朋友
Your roommate's a soap opera star.
Your character is in a coma.
I promised myself I wasn't gonna cry at this one.
I know my life's going pretty well, but I see so many people...
...who've accomplished so many of their goals by the time they're 30.
Yeah, but you shouldn't compare yourself to me.
- Come on, Phoebe. - You can do it.
- 来 菲比 - 你做得到的
Come on. There you go.
I did it. One mile on a Hippity Hop.
That's it. That's everything I wanted to do before I was 30.
Oh, except I wanted to patch things up with my sister.
And, girls, this thing is a godsend, if you know what I mean. Heh.
女人 这东西是上帝给的礼物 如果你懂我的意思
Come on, let's have some fun, huh? What do you want to do today?
Nothing. I don't want to do anything.
Doing nothing on your 30th is better than doing something stupid, like Ross.
在30岁生日时什么都不做 总比做笨事好 像罗斯一样
Hey, that was a practical purchase.
I needed that car for transportation.
Okay? I have a child.
How hot do I look in this, huh?
Ross, a sports car?
Wouldn't it be cheaper to just stuff a sock down there?
That's not what this is about, okay?
I am a sports car enthusiast.
- I've always been into cars. - What's the horsepower on this thing?
- 我一直都很喜欢车 - 它的马力多少？
I don't know, but look how shiny.
- I can't believe you bought this. - So can I have a ride, stud?
- 你竟然买了这台车 - 帅哥 载我一程吧？
Get ready for the smoothest ride of your life.
Okay, who's next?
You know what? I am gonna do something today.
I'm not just gonna sit around like some old lady.
I want to get something pierced.
Like my, uh, nose or my tongue or something.
像是鼻子 舌头 或是别的地方
Really? Because, you know, that hurts.
So what? You know, the way I see it...
Look, Rachel, I know what you're going through.
I'm totally freaked out about turning 25.
Get out of my apartment.
Rach, for what it's worth, I think that you're doing great.
I mean, let's face it, no one handles this well.
正视事实吧 没有人能真的 好好处理这件事
Heh. Least of all you.
Would you put that back on. Monica's gonna be here any minute.
But it hurts my Joey's apple.
Okay, for the last time, it's not named after each individual man.
You've done a wonderful job with this party, Chandler.
- Everything looks so lovely. - Oh, well, not as lovely as you.
- 每样东西都很美丽 - 没有像你这么美丽
I mean, I can't believe you would have a 30-year-old daughter.
And you, I can't believe you would have a tux that's 30 years old.
It's older than that. Ross was actually conceived right near this tuxedo.
Okay, everybody hide. I saw her. She's coming.
大家躲起来 我看到她了 她来了
Okay, okay. Everybody down. Everybody down.
好吧 好吧 大家蹲下…
Okay, everybody stay here. I will find out what's going on.
Hey, you got the door open.
Hey, are you drunk?
See, I was a little nervous about turning...
So the busboys took me out for some drinks.
Might want to puke on you later.
Okay, here's the thing. We have thrown a very formal surprise party for you.
All your friends are in there and your parents.
Oh, no. My parents have never seen me drunk.
哦 不 我父母从没看我醉过
Here's the thing. We'll get you some coffee and they will never know that you're drunk.
- Really, you promise? - Yeah, I'll take care of it.
- 你确定？ - 我会处理好的
Okay, we have to do something about your breath.
What about your breath?
That's still yours.
Okay, now, remember, it's a surprise party.
So when you go in, act surprised.
- Okay. - Okay. Shh.
- 好吧 - 好吧 嘘
Okay, forward. Forward.
好 前进 前进
Okay, back... Stop!
Okay, for... Stop! Stop! Stop!
前… 停 停 停
Okay. Okay, here's what we're gonna do.
I'm gonna break into this minivan, put it in neutral.
You guys push it forward so Ross can drive out of the spot.
Okay? All right. Here we go.
Happy 30th birthday. Here.
It's for the child in you. And the woman.
Why do you keep saying that?
Because it's our 30th birthday.
Yeah, no, we're not 30. We're 31. Okay.
不 我们不是30 我们31岁了
Yeah, we're not 30. We're 31.
对 我们不是30 我们是31
Yuh-huh. That's what it says on my birth certificate.
You have your birth certificate?
Yeah, I got a big box of family stuff when my mom died.
我妈去世时 我拿到了 一箱子家庭文件
- Do you have my birth certificate? - No, I sold it to a Swedish runaway.
- 你有我的吗？ - 没有 我卖给了一个逃家的瑞典人
Oh, my God, we are 31.
I just lost a whole year of my life.
- Your middle name is Pamela? - Yes.
- 你的纪念名字是潘蜜拉？ - 对
Oh, I never knew mine. Do you remember what it is?
- That's my first name. - Right. Okay. Then, no.
- 那是我的正式名字 - 对 好吧 那我不知道
Look at that. We made it all the way across the room. You're doing great.
- What's going on? - Monica's a little drunk.
- 怎么回事？ - 摩妮卡有一点醉了
Yay, I love drunk Monica.
Oh, she's so much more fun than regular Monica.
She doesn't want her parents to know she's drunk.
Oh, all right, all right. Here's what we'll do.
好 好 我们这么做
I'll get twice as drunk as Monica and then no one's even gonna notice her.
Maybe that'll liven up this party.
Okay, will you just go help her get changed, please?
Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey.
照顾酒醉 裸体的女人 好像是乔伊的工作
- This one's from me. - Ah.
- 这是我的礼物 - 啊
It wasn't on your list, but hopefully you'll think it's really fun.
Always stick to the list.
No, no, no, I love it. Thank you.
不 不 我很喜欢 谢谢
Okay, open ours next. Open ours next.
Now that you're a couple, we don't get two presents from you?
For my last birthday, you gave me a hug.
- Okay, read the card, read the card. - Okay.
- 念卡片 念卡片 - 好吧
"Happy birthday, Grandma.
It's better to be over the hill...
...than buried under it.
All our love, Monica and Chandler." That's funny.
No, no, no, no. That was a joke.
不 不 只是一个玩笑
I know, I get it. It's funny.
我知道 我懂了 很好笑
No, because you're not a grandmother.
I know, because to be a grandmother, you have to be married and have children.
I don't have any of those things. That's why it's so funny.
All you had to do was buy the card.
Okay, you know what?
It was stupid to get upset about not having a husband and kids.
All I really needed was a plan.
See, I wanna have three kids.
Let me guess. And you want to have them all at the same time...
...and you want to have them for your brother. Ha, ha.
I should probably have the first of the three kids by the time I'm 35, right?
Which gives me five years.
So if I wanna have a kid when I'm 35, I don't have to get pregnant until I'm 34.
Which gives Prada four years to start making maternity clothes.
Oh, wait, but I do want to be married for a year before I get pregnant.
Really? That long?
Look all you want, it's happening.
So I don't have to get married until I'm 33.
That's three years. That's three whole years.
Oh, wait a minute though.
I'll need a year and a half to plan the wedding.
And I'd like to know the guy for like a year, year and a half...
...before we get engaged.
Which means I need to meet the guy by the time I'm 30.
Which is fine, because you just turned...
No, Ross. No, it is not fine.
不 罗斯 不 有问题
According to my plan, I should already be with the guy that I'm gonna marry.
Will you quit hogging it?
Oh, I'm telling you, it's like watching Bambi learn how to walk.
Mom and Dad are gonna be mad.
Maybe I'm a little drunk.
Hey. Are those crab cakes?
Did I not tell you to come straight to me when more crab cakes were ready?
I want to make love to you right here, right now.
I really wish that you wouldn't.
All you have to do is just get through a little bit more, okay?
Then we can put you in bed, okay? Just smile and don't talk to anyone.
Speech, speech. Let's hear from the birthday girl, huh?
演讲 演讲 寿星演讲
Don't you see, everybody's looking at me.
The plan's working.
I didn't even have to take off my top yet.
Speech. Come on, speech.
Hey, Chandler, you can't keep your hands off her for one second.
Oh, I think it's nice.
I think it's necessary.
I wanna thank you all for coming.
My family and my friends.
I'd really like to say that I'm, um...
You know what I'd really like to say?
That's right, Mom and Dad.
没错 爸 妈
Your little "Harmomica" is hammered.
And guess what? I've been drunk before.
And I've smoked a cigarette.
But you know what? You know what?
It's all okay. It's okay, because I turned 30 today.
没关系 没关系 因为我今天满30岁了
And I can do anything I want.
Because I am a grownup.
- Okay, quick. Help me get this off. - Yeah.
- 好 快 替我脱掉 - 耶
I lost a whole year.
I can't believe it. This is so unfair.
Come on, Pheebs, it'll be okay.
How would you feel if you found out you were 31?
That's not gonna happen, you know, because we have a new deal.
Plus, it totally ruined my schedule.
I haven't done any of the things I wanted to do by the time I was 31.
- Like what? - Like, okay...
- 像什么？ - 像…
...I haven't met any Portuguese people.
I haven't had the perfect kiss.
And I haven't been to sniper school.
Phoebe, why don't we go upstairs and have some birthday cake?
No, I just feel like being by myself for a while, all right? I'll see you guys later.
我只想一个人静一下 待会见 谢谢
Hey, you know what, you guys? I think I'm gonna go walk her home.
- Oh, man. - What?
- 老天 - 怎么？
He's gonna eat the cake.
Maybe that's one you can cross off your list.
Oh, and plus, I'm one-sixteenth Portuguese.
Okay, is everybody clear? We're gonna pick it up...
All we need is teamwork, okay? We're gonna lift the car...
...and slide it out.
- Ross, I really don't think this... - Lift...
- 罗斯我真的不觉得这…- 抬起来…
- Okay, here we go. - All right, everyone.
- 好 开始吧 - 好 大伙儿
- Hey, Joey... - Oh, come on, Rach, my turn just started.
- 嘿 乔伊… - 别这样 瑞秋 才刚轮到我
Actually, I just want to talk to Tag.
Oh, okay. Hey, can I ride this outside?
哦 好 嘿 我可以到外面溜吗？
- Whatever, okay? I'm not your mother. - Okay.
- 随便 我不是你妈 - 好吧
- Not in the street! - Yeah.
- 不要到街上 - 耶
- How you doing, you feeling any better? - Yeah, I'm doing okay. I'm, um...
- 有没有觉得好一点？ - 有 我很好 我…
- Let's talk. - Okay.
- 我们谈谈 - 好吧
- Um... - What's up?
- 额… - 什么事？
You're such a great guy, and we have so much fun together.
- But I... - Wait.
- 可是我… - 等一下
I think I see where you're going.
But before you say anything else, can I just say one more thing?
And a, uh, good example of the fun I was referring to.
Uh, but, heh, I think I'm past the point where I can, you know, just have fun.
Rachel, don't do this. This is just because you're turning 30.
瑞秋 不要这样 这只是因为你30岁了
But you're just a kid. I mean, you're 25.
- Twenty-four, actually. - Oh, God.
- 其实是24岁 - 老天
You know what I wish? I wish you were six years older.
Well, actually, if I'm wishing for stuff, I actually wish I was six years younger.
- Me too. - Yeah. I'm sorry.
- 我也是 - 是啊 对不起
Hey, how'd it go?
If I only want two kids, can I keep him for another year?
You did the right thing.
I don't like this anymore.
Well, here we are. Just a bunch of 30-year-olds.
Wow, do you realize in 10 years we're gonna be 40?
Why, God? Why are you doing this to us?
Yes. My baby's finally free.
Start it up. Let's go.
You wanna buy a car?