What are you looking at?
A poster for that WWI movie I'm in. Check it out.
Wow! It looks really violent!
I know. I'm coming soon to a theater near you.
I'm in THX. I'm unsuitable for children!
- I cannot wait to see this. - It's generating Oscar buzz.
- 我等不及要看这个 - 它有拿下奥斯卡金像奖的希望
- I started that! - I thought I did!
- 是我开始的 - 我以为是我
I just talked to my agent...
...and the premiere is next week and you're all invited!
- Will we take a limo? - Sure!
- 我们要坐加长礼车吗 - 当然
I love taking limos when nobody died.
Well, I won't be able to come.
For those who haven't checked their calendars, today's my due date.
I want to thank you guys for how great you've been during this.
I couldn't have done it without you. I loved these last 9 months.
I'm looking forward to the next part...
...but I am really gonna miss being pregnant.
That's right. Still no baby.
Come on, people, make some room.
Uh, sweetie, maybe you'd be more comfortable here.
Like you haven't done enough.
I know you're miserable. I wish there was something I could do.
I wish I were a sea horse.
Because with sea horses, it's the male. They carry the babies.
And then also, um, I'd be far away in the sea.
I have never been so uncomfortable in my entire life.
I know. I remember toward the end
That's a great story. Tell it while you're getting me some iced tea.
Oh, God, get out! Get out, get out, get out!
天啊 滚出来 滚出来 滚出来
# So no one told you life was gonna be this way #
# 没有人告诉你活着有多累 #
# Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A. #
# 上班受罪 口袋空空 爱情变累赘 #
# It's like you're always stuck in second gear #
# 寂寞又潦倒 受气又受累 #
# When it hasn't been your day, #
# 日复一日 年复一年 #
# your week, your month, or even your year #
# 时运不济 活着受罪 #
# but I'll be there for you #
# 你我永不离弃 #
# 'Cause you're there for me too #
# 你我相偎相依 #
Hey, did you have the baby yet?
Do you want me to sit on you? Because I'll do it.
- What are you doing here? - They sent me home from work.
- 你这么早回这里做什么 - 公司要我回家
They said, "Start your maternity leave now. Just rest."
You know what? Screw them!
If they don't want me there, I'll hang out with you guys.
Or you could do volunteer work.
- Hello? - Joey, it's Estelle.
- 喂 - 乔伊 我是伊斯特
I was able to get you and one guest tickets to your premiere.
- You told me I could have six tickets. - I sold four on eBay.
- 你说我可以拿六张票 - 我把四张拿去网站拍卖了
You'll be sitting next to HotGuy372.
So that's it? I only get to bring one guest?
Yeah. What time do you want to pick me up?
You hear that? I only get one extra ticket.
So somehow I have to pick between you three and Ross.
- What about me? - You said you didn't want to go.
- 我呢 - 你说过你不想去
I would still like to be acknowledged.
- Because I'm pregnant, I'm invisible? - Definitely not invisible.
- 我怀孕了就变成隐形人 - 你绝不是隐形人
Ross didn't care enough to be here, so he's out.
- You snooze, you lose. - He's not snoozing. He's teaching class.
- 你打瞌睡你就输了 - 他没有打瞌睡 他在教书
Well, then somebody's snoozing.
And, Joey, not that this should, uh, affect you at all, but, um, if you pick me...
乔伊 我不是要你听我的 但如果你选了我…
...I was planning on wearing a sequin dress out down to here.
- I haven't seen this dress. - Star in a movie.
- 我还没有看过这套洋装 - 看过电影明星穿
Pick whoever you want. Listen to your heart. What does it tell you?
你想挑谁都可以 听你的心说话 它跟你说了什么
I think I want to take Chandler.
- You want to take me? - Yeah, I wish I could take everybody.
- 你要挑我 - 对 抱歉 我希望能带大家去
But Chandler's always supported my career.
He's paid for acting classes, headshots and stuff.
This will be my way of paying you back.
So you're never actually going to pay me back?
Just because he paid for your headshots, you're gonna take him?
I don't think you're comprehending just how slutty this dress is.
It's not just the stuff he paid for. It's everything, you know?
不光只因为他付了钱 他真的很支持我 你们知道吗
He read lines with me. He went with me on auditions.
Then he consoled me after I didn't get parts.
You always believed in me, man, even when I didn't.
I always knew you were gonna make it. I'm so proud of you.
Thanks, that means a lot to me.
Mon, maybe one of these guys wants to wear your dress.
- I'm gonna go shave. Ahem. - Yeah, well, I'm gonna go, uh, spit.
- 我得去刮胡子 - 对 我得去吐痰了
Ugh, I have to pee.
If I don't come out, it's because I've choked to death on the potpourri stink.
You hold her nose, I'll blow in her mouth and the kid'll just...
She's a week late. She's got to have it today.
她晚了一个星期 今天她一定会生 对吧
I don't know. I think it's still gonna be a while.
Hmm. Care to make it interesting?
- I bet you she'll have it tomorrow. - You're on.
- 我跟你赌她明天此时会生 - 没问题
- Okay, how much? - One hundred thousand dollars.
- 好吧 赌多少 - 10万
- How about 50 bucks? - I'll call Zurich and move some money.
- 50块如何 - 我会打电话到苏黎世请他们汇钱来
All right, whose turn is it to help me get up?
Ahem, no one's here.
This is exciting. So glamorous! People taking our picture. How do I look?
真是太刺激 太棒了 好多人帮我们拍照 我看起来如何
- A little tall. - What?
- 太高了一点 - 什么
Would you crouch down a bit so that I look taller?
It's just so glamorous.
Oh, hey, Mon? Rach is here.
And you're still pregnant.
I'm sorry. I know how uncomfortable you are.
- You know what? You look great. - Aw.
Yeah, like 50 bucks.
I have to go pee. Apparently this baby thinks my bladder is a squeeze toy.
我得去尿尿 很明显地这个宝宝 把我的膀胱当成玩具捏
Damn it. Here's your 50 bucks.
That's interesting that you lost. Now, I forget, do you like to lose?
你会输真的是太有趣了… 我忘了 你喜欢输吗
All right, stop it.
- Double or nothing she has it tomorrow. - Fine.
- 我们加倍来赌她明天会生 - 好吧
Until then, General Grant, why don't you set up camp right there?
在那之前 葛兰特将军 你为什么不在这里…扎营
- Rachel here? We have an appointment. - In the bathroom.
- 瑞秋在这里吗 我们得去看医生 - 在厕所里
- Rach, we gotta go. - In a minute!
- 瑞秋 我们得走了 - 马上好
People ask why we're not together. I just don't know what to tell them.
All right, all right, let's go.
Uh, do you want to go change first?
The doctor's keeping the office open late for us, but if you hurry...
- No, I'm fine. - You don't think that's inappropriate?
- 不 我很好 真的 - 你不觉那套衣服很不适当吗
- What? - Good God, man. Don't anger it.
- 什么 - 天啊 别火上加油
Ross, it is 100 degrees outside. For the first time in weeks, I am...
罗斯 外面有华氏一百度 这是几星期以来我第一次…
Fine. Whatever you want. You're the mommy.
好吧 随便你 你是妈咪
Uh-uh, pal! Don't call me "Mommy."
不 老兄 别叫我"妈味"
It's bad enough you call your own mother that.
I'm actually with her on this one.
I thought I knew who the enemy was...
Okay, this is it. This is my big fight scene coming up.
好吧 来了 我的打斗戏要开始了
I'm fighting for every man in the 82nd Ground Division.
- Ross? - Yeah?
- 罗斯 - 什么事
- Can I ask you something? - Uh-huh.
When Carol was pregnant with Ben...
...were you this irritating?
- Wow. - Excuse me?
- 喔 - 你说什么
Uh, nothing. You're just, uh...
You've been a little short with me lately. I'm not trying to irritate you.
Well, then, you must have a natural talent for it.
The doctor will be in soon. Why don't we not speak until then?
Seriously. Breathe louder, Ross. That's great.
说真的 呼吸大声一点 罗斯 那真的太棒了
We should ask the doctor if she even knows...
...how to deliver a baby that's half human, half pure evil!
- Hi, Dr. Long. How are you? - Hello.
- 朗医生 你好吗 - 你好
You're nice to her.
- We'll do a quick check. - Okay.
- 我很快帮你检查一下 - 好的
- Eight days late, huh? - Yeah.
- 已经迟了八天吗 - 对
You must be getting uncomfortable.
You're 80 percent effaced. You're on your way. It still could last a while.
宝宝已经下降了八成 就快了 但你可能还得等上一阵子
- There are ways to help things along. - Do them!
- 如果你很急 有些方式可以帮助你 - 那就做吧
Actually, they're things you can do. Home remedies.
In my experience, I've found some are very effective.
- Well, we are ready to try anything. - There's an herbal tea you can drink.
- 我们愿意尝试任何事 - 好 你可以喝一种药草茶
You can take some castor oil. There's spicy foods.
We will do all of those.
- Taking a long walk. - Good. Done.
- 散很久的步 - 很好 没问题
And there's the one that's proved most effective: sex.
You've got to be kidding me.
Good job, Joe! Well done! Top-notch!
演的好 乔伊 太棒了 一流的
- You liked it'? You really liked it? - Oh, yeah!
- 你真的喜欢吗 - 喜欢
- Well, which part exactly? - The whole thing! Here we go!
- 你喜欢哪个部分 - 全部 我们走吧
No, no, no. Give me some specifics.
I loved the specifics. The specifics were the best part.
Hey, what about the scene with the kangaroo? Did you like that part?
I was surprised to see a kangaroo in a World War I epic.
There was no kangaroo! They didn't take any of my suggestions!
- Thanks for coming. See you later. - Don't go. I'm so sorry.
- 谢谢你来看 回头见 - 别走了 我很抱歉
Look, this guy fell asleep! He fell asleep too! Be mad at him!
听着 这家伙睡着了 他也睡着了 生他的气啊
Or call an ambulance!
What did the doctor say? Any news on when the baby will come?
No. She gave us ideas on how to induce labor.
We tried them all.
We went for a walk, uh, we tried tea, castor oil, spicy food. Nothing worked.
我们去散步 喝了茶 吃篦麻子油跟辣的食物 通通没用
There is one thing we didn't try.
But someone thinks that that will open up a can of worms.
If it's gonna help bring the baby here, today...
...I think you should do it.
- It's sex. - Do it!
- 我们得做爱 - 就做啊
- Monica. - It's been a really long time for you.
- 摩妮卡 - 你们很久没做爱了
I mean, women have needs. Do it. Get yours.
我是说女人也有需要 快去吧 满足你的需要
Oh, I don't know about that.
I think if the two of you had sex, the repercussions would be catastrophic.
All right, let's be practical.
If Ross isn't willing, he's not the only guy you can have sex with.
You could borrow Chandler. Chandler is good.
Monica, what is the matter with you?
- I just want the baby to be born today. - Why today?
- 我只是希望宝宝能在今天出生 - 为什么一定要今天
I bet Phoebe that you're gonna have the baby, and I don't want to lose again.
What? While she's been going through this hell, you've been making money?
什么 她这么痛苦 你却在赢钱
You're betting on your friend staying in this misery?
- I'll take that bet. - What?
- 我要赌 - 什么
I'm miserable. I may as well make some money out of it.
Can I get some of that action?
I'm betting against all of you?
I really feel like tomorrow it's gonna happen.
Hey, Sleeping Beauty.
Where have you been? I want to talk to you. I still feel bad.
你跑到哪里去了 我想跟你谈一谈 我还是很难过
Oh, no. Were you upset? Did you lose sleep?
不 你很难过 你睡不着吗
The reason I came over is to settle things between us.
I wanted to pay you back with the premiere, but you missed it.
- So how much do I owe you? - What?
- 好 我欠你多少钱 - 什么
- I don't want to owe you anything. - You don't owe me.
- 说个数字 我不想欠你 - 你什么都不欠我
- I don't want your... - Ah, ah, ah. We're doing this!
- 我不要你的… - 我们得这么做
You got me my first headshots. How much?
- I don't know, uh, $500. - Okay, $500. What else?
- 我不知道 五百块 - 好吧 五百块 还有呢
Then there was the second set. The infamous "booger" headshots.
Okay, so that's another 500. That's 500 and 500. That's...
好吧 再加五百块 五百加五百是…
- You want a calculator? - Please.
- 你需要计算机吗 - 谢谢
All right, what else?
Well, uh, there's acting classes, stage-combat classes, tap classes...
还有表演课 舞台打斗课 踢踏舞课…
Which we're still keeping under our hats.
That dialect coach who helped you with a Southern accent.
Which, after 20 hours of lessons, still came out Jamaican.
What the hell are you talking about?
The South will rise again, man.
- Yes, money well-spent. - Yeah.
- 对 那笔钱花得很值得 - 对
Okay, what else? Rent.
好吧 还有呢 房租
Uh, two, three years of rent, utilities, food...
两 三年的房租杂文费 伙食费…
Okay, so I'm writing you a check for...
So you fell asleep during my movie. Big deal, right?
你看我的电影看到睡着了 没什么大不了的 对吧
How do you clear this thing?
Finish your enchilada.
Ross, we've tried all the spicy food. It's not working.
罗斯 我们试过所有的辣食物 根本没用
Okay, here, have one of these peppers.
好吧 拿去 吃根辣椒
Oh, God. So hot. Oh, my God.
天啊 好辣 我的天啊
By the way, you don't want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.
I am feeling nothing.
Speaking of hot, watching you do that...
...really makes me want to have sex with you.
- Stop it. - Come on! Why are we wasting time?
- 另闹了 - 快点 我们为什么要浪费时间
We know it's gonna work. It's doctor-recommended.
I'm sorry. But we have to have some boundaries. My God, I'm dying.
抱歉 但我们有言在先 天啊 我快辣死了
We've done it before. We'll do it again.
得了吧 我们以前做过 可以再做一次
It'll be a nice way to bookend the pregnancy.
I'm not gonna make love to you so you'll go into labor.
Make love'? What are you, a girl?
Always a great way to get into a man's pants.
You'll be performing a service. Think of me as a ketchup bottle.
Sometimes, you have to bang on the end of it to get it to come out.
I love when you talk dirty to me.
Oh, I know it. You're right. That's not sexy.
我知道 你说的对 那一点都不性感
Oh, I seem to have dropped my fork.
Let me just bend over and get it.
Okay, enough. This is not going to happen.
好吧 够了 这是不可能发生的
Come on, Ross. I'm miserable here.
来吧 罗斯 我真的很难受
Come on, you started this, now you finish it!
来吧 这是你惹出来的 你得结束它
Come on, wuss. Make love to me.
快点 懦夫 跟我做爱
- You know what? - What?
- 你知道吗 - 什么
What now, Ross, you're not gonna talk?
怎么了 罗斯 你不想谈吗
How on earth will you ever annoy me?
Oh, wait a minute, I know.
You'd think the jalapeno would clear up your sinuses, but no!
That's not enough... What are you doing?
I'm getting that baby out of you!
- Oh, God! - I know.
- 天啊 - 我知道
I think my water just broke.
Okay, I got the pillow. Uh, I got the bag.
好吧 我拿了枕头 还有包包
- You got the keys? - I got the keys. Okay.
- 你拿了钥匙吗 - 我拿了
We're having a baby.
I didn't, uh, have time to read this part of the books, but do we have time...?
- Not so much. - Okay, let's go.
- 我们的时间不多 - 好吧 我们走吧
- Two hundred. - Thank you.
- 两百 - 谢谢
That's it. I don't care when the baby comes. No more betting.
够了 我不在乎宝宝何时出生 我不要赌了
I guess we could bet one more time.
- Is Rachel having the baby? - How did you know that?
- 瑞秋要生了吗 - 你怎么知道
- Joey! Chandler! It's time! - They're at the coffee house.
- 乔伊 钱德 时间到了 - 他们在咖啡厅
You know everything!
Wait. I bet you the baby is over 7 pounds.
I bet you it has hair! I bet you it's a girl.
- We know it's a girl. - I'll give you really good odds.
- 我们知道她要生女儿 - 我给你很高的赔率