We're here to say goodbye. We're off to Ohio.
Oh, right, your adoption interview.
Yep. We'll meet the lady who could be carrying our baby.
I can't believe it. When you come back, you'll have a baby. That is so weird.
And so incorrect.
She's only a couple months pregnant.
She liked our application, who knows if she'll like us.
Oh, come on, she's gonna love you guys.
Oh, thank you. But we're trying not to get our hopes up.
A lot could still get in our way.
She could decide against adoption, like another couple better.
What are you gonna name it?
I could develop a condition in which I talk and talk, and no one hears a word.
But just think, okay? What if everything goes right?
What if this woman does pick you guys?
Oh, my God. She's gonna pick us!
So we're standing firm on "not getting our hopes up"?
No. I know things could still go wrong, but if they don't...
不 我知道可能出错 但顺利的话…
...if this works out, we're gonna have a baby. A baby!
- Yes. But... - Oh, my God. It's gonna work!
- 对 但是… - 天啊 一定会成功
We're gonna make it work!
I'm gonna be a mommy and you're gonna be a daddy!
All right, I'll see you suckers. I'm gonna go get me a baby!
好 各位再见 我要当妈去了
Oh, screw it. I'm gonna be a daddy!
Hey, who's Phoebe with?
I wanna say, "Someone I'm gonna have sex with."
- So, uh, who's your friend? - Oh, that's Sarah.
- 你朋友是谁？ - 那是莎拉
No. Don't you get any ideas.
I'm not setting you up with any more of my friends.
- Why? Why? - Because you'll date her once...
- 为什么？ - 因为你只会和她约会一次
...sleep with her, then forget she exists.
Oh! Name one friend of yours I did that with.
- Mandy. - Mandy, huh? Uh...
- 曼蒂 - 曼蒂是吗？
Really hot blond, big boobs?
- No. - Might be why I don't remember her, huh?
- 不是 - 难怪我记不得
Do you think I'm someone else?
Okay, look, I may not have treated your friends well in the past.
But I have grown up a lot. Really. Honest. Rach?
但我成熟了 真的 对吗 瑞秋？
Yeah, believe it or not, it's true.
对 信不信由你 是真的
I mean, when Joey and I were together...
...he was wonderful. He was thoughtful and mature.
And for the one week that we went out...
...he didn't sleep with anybody else.
- Fine, I'll give you her number. - Okay. Thank you.
- 好吧 我给你她的号码 - 谢谢
And I promise you I will not forget this one.
- Mandy. - Sarah!
- 曼蒂 - 是莎拉
- Hey. - Hey, guys, I need some fashion advice.
- 嗨 - 各位 我需要时尚顾问
How does this look?
Well, it's... It's a little low. Pick it up a little.
Now throw it away.
Come on! This looks good.
Ross, please trust me. I buy 30 fashion magazines a month.
罗斯 相信我 我每个月读三十本时尚杂志
Now, I don't know who's running for president or who that NATO guy is...
...but I do know that you have to get far away from that hat.
I have this date tomorrow night, and I have to look cool.
If you want fashion help, Rachel and I are going shopping tomorrow.
- You're welcome to come with us. - Really? That would be great.
- 你可以一起来 - 真的？那太好了
Uh, I mean, I have to do something.
She kind of teased me about how I dress.
I can see why. Nice shirt. Ha, ha.
You're wearing the same shirt.
Stupid Gap on every corner!
Make yourselves comfortable, and I'll be back with Erica.
- Are you okay? - Yeah, it's just weird, you know?
- 你没事吧？ - 我很好 只是怪怪的
It's like, uh, "Hi, I'm Chandler. May I have the human growing inside you?"
You're gonna be great.
Monica? Chandler? I'd like you to meet Erica.
- Hi. - Hi. It is so, so nice to meet you.
- 嗨 - 嗨 很高兴认识你
- Hi. - Thank you for agreeing to see us.
- 嗨 - 谢谢你和我们见面
- Hi. - I'll let you get acquainted.
- 嗨 - 我让你们好好聊聊
- Okay. - So it's Monica and Chandler?
- 好 - 你们是摩妮卡和钱德？
I only know you as "File CRW33815-D."
我只知道你们是 CRW 33815一D号
That's what our friends call us.
Gosh, you know, you're just such an amazing couple. It's...
...kind of intimidating.
Oh, ha, ha. I don't know about that.
Are you kidding me? I mean, it's enough that you're a doctor.
But on top of it, you're married to a reverend?
- I don't think that's exactly... - Let her finish, doctor.
- 这好像不是… - 让她说完 医生
Oh, my friend Sarah had a great time last night.
- Yeah. - Yeah, so you gonna call this one back?
- 是啊 - 那你要打电话给她吗？
What are you talking about? Sarah's great.
Oh, really? You wanna know what your "great" friend did?
We were out to dinner, okay?
We were getting along, having a really nice time.
I was thinking she was really cool.
And then, out of nowhere...
That's why you won't go out with her again?
So she took some fries. Big deal.
Hey, look, it's not about a few fries.
It's about what the fries represent.
- What? - All food!
- 什么意义？ - 所有的食物
I can't believe I set you up with such a monster!
Hey, hey, hey, look, I take a girl out...
...she can order whatever she wants. The more the better, all right?
她想点什么都行 吃越多越好 懂吗？
Just don't order a garden salad and then eat my food!
That's a good way to lose some fingers.
Oh, thank God you're here.
- Listen to this. - What?
- 听听看 - 怎么了？
Joey and my friend are out last night, having dinner, and she reaches over...
...and takes a few of his fries... - Oh, no!
- 拿了几根他的薯条 - 不
- Mm-hm. - What?
- 嗯 - 什么？
You know about the plate thing?
Oh, yeah, yeah. No, Joey doesn't share food.
I mean, just last week we were having breakfast...
...and he had a couple grapes on his plate.
- You wouldn't let her have a grape? - Oh, no, not me.
- 你不让她吃葡萄？ - 不是我
Joey doesn't share food!
Well, I still think that is a stupid reason not to call someone again.
You are calling her, okay?
And if you need to, then just get an extra plate of fries for the table.
A sharing buffer. Yeah.
Yeah, I'll order some extra fries. Maybe a plate of onion rings.
好 我多点一盘薯条 或一盘洋葱圈
And a shrimp cocktail.
Uh-huh. And some Buffalo wings.
Maybe... Maybe an individual pizza, huh?
And some mozzarella sticks.
What were we talking about?
Wow, this place is awesome.
We should just go. I'm not gonna find anything here.
This stuff is ridiculous.
Oh, this place is great!
Rach, come on, I'm not gonna wear any of this. Nothing silver.
瑞秋 我不要穿这些 我讨厌银色
- Wha...? - Okay, nothing with hair.
- 为什么？ - 我也不要有毛的
- And nothing with padlocks on it! - Aw.
- 有锁的也不行 - 啊
Ross, look. Look, I know that some of this stuff is out there.
But, I mean, come on, look at this. Look at this sweater.
I mean, this is just beautiful.
Wow, this is really soft.
Three hundred and fifty dollars?
Down from 700. You're saving like 200 bucks.
Both logic and math are taking a serious hit today.
Hey, check this out. It's totally you.
Wow. Actually, this looks pretty good.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
- 是啊 - 是啊
"Boys will be boys"?
- What? They will be! - All right.
- 什么？本来就是 - 对
- That's it, I'm getting out of here. - No, Ross, wait, come on.
- 够了 我要走了 - 不 罗斯你等等
There's other stuff here. There's some nice shirts, these nice pants.
Huh. Actually, these might look pretty good on me.
Yes, they will. You know what you should do? Go take a walk.
I know your size, and I'm gonna pick out some really good stuff for you.
- Really? - Yes.
- 真的？ - 对
I know what looks sexy on guys.
Just wear what I suggest, and she is gonna go nuts for you.
So you're saying, uh...
...if I wear these pants, I might be getting into hers?
Why do men keep talking to me like this?
So the fact that I'm a doctor and my wife's a reverend...
...that's important to you?
Yeah. I read some great applications...
...but I thought, "Who better than a minister to raise a child?"
Plus, I thought the baby would be in good hands with a doctor.
Reverend, can I ask? Does the Bible say anything about adoption?
It says, "Do it."
"And behold, she did adopt unto them a baby.
And it was good."
- Wow. - Yeah, wow.
- 哇 - 是啊 哇
I was wondering... You both have such serious jobs.
Would you have time to take care of a baby and your flock?
Oh, no, my flock? My flock is good.
Yeah. My flock pretty much takes care of themselves by this point.
It's a good flock. Flock, flock, flock.
But being a doctor, that must take up a lot of time.
Not for me it doesn't.
So how's everything going in here?
We're great. I think I may have asked all my questions.
Good. Do you have questions for Erica?
Yeah, actually. So you read a file that you liked...
...and then you gave the agency the serial number and they contacted us?
Oh, yes. Our system ensures total anonymity.
- We're very proud of it. - You should be.
- 我们深感为仿 - 应该的
You're really on top of stuff.
Well, then if there's nothing else, then the two of us should talk.
- I don't think we have to. - We don't?
- 我们不用谈了 - 不用？
Yeah, when I read about you two, I was pretty sure I wanted you...
对 我看到你们的档案时 就确定要选你们…
...but I just thought we should meet face to face.
I've made my decision.
Oh, my God, this is great.
This is so great. Did you hear that?
- Thank you. Thank you so much. Oh. - Ha, ha.
- 谢谢 真的很感谢你 - 哈哈
Oh. You are so going to heaven!
- Oh, we got some really great stuff. - Yeah.
- 我们买了很多好东西 - 对
Yeah, but I'm not sure about some of the bras I got.
Oh, really? Do you wanna try some of them on for me?
Wait, are we in Joey's imagination?
Oh, no. I took one of Ross' bags by mistake.
And one of mine is missing.
Ross probably has it. You'll get it from him later.
So, what do you think?
I think we're not wearing the same shirt anymore.
Yeah. Yeah, Rachel picked it out for me.
She told me to trust her, and you know what? I'm glad I did.
她要我相信她 你知道吗？ 还好我听她的
I turned quite a few heads on my way over here.
Dude, I really don't think you should be wearing that.
Somebody's afraid of a little competition with the ladies?
Looks like someone is the ladies!
You're just jealous because you couldn't pull this off.
Yeah. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a date.
See? All eyes on me!
- We are not signing those papers. - Why not?
- 我们不能签收养文件 - 为什么？
It's wrong. They made a mistake. They think we're somebody else.
God works in mysterious ways.
You have gotta stop.
But she liked us.
She likes Doctor Chandler and Reverend Monica.
If you think about it, I'm kind of like a reverend.
I mean, as a chef, I serve God by feeding the hungry and poor.
Your veal chop is 34.95.
Come on, I just... I think we've been given an opportunity.
拜托 我只是… 我认为这是个机会
The mistake's already made. They're writing up the papers now.
But we're not the ones she chose.
How can you feel okay about this?
We may not be who she thinks we are...
...but no one will ever love that baby more than us.
- I know. - I mean, who knows...
- 我知道 - 我是说谁知道…
...how long it's gonna take for someone else to give us a baby?
What if no one ever picks us?
Please. We are so close.
Monica, I want a baby too.
But this woman is giving away her child.
She deserves to know who it's going to.
Okay. You're right.
So we'll tell the truth.
And who knows, you know? Maybe she'll like us for us.
Oh, why couldn't I have been a reverend?
Garden salad for the lady.
- Oh, that looks great. Good ordering. - Ha-ha-ha.
- 很好吃的感觉 点得好 - 哈哈
Seafood platter for the gentleman, and extra fries.
- Enjoy. - Ha, ha.
- 请享用 - 哈哈
Mm. Those fries look delicious.
- Oh, I didn't know you liked french fries. - Ha, ha.
- 我不知道你喜欢吃薯条 - 哈哈
Help yourself. What's mine is yours.
Oh. Wow, are those stuffed clams?
Yes, they are my stuffed clams.
How about those fries, though, huh?
- They are delicious. Ha-ha-ha. - Yeah.
- 很好吃 - 对
You are beautiful, you know that?
Now look what you did!
What? What is the matter with you?
I don't like it when people take food off of my plate, okay?
我不喜欢别人吃我 盘子上的东西 行吗？
But you said, "What's mine is yours."
Well, I didn't mean it!
Fine. Sorry, I didn't think it was that big a deal.
No, I'm sorry. I...
不是 抱歉 我…
I'm overreacting, okay? It's just, when it comes to food, I...
...have certain rules...
...okay? I mean...
...there are things you do, and, you know, things that you don't do.
Wow, this place looks great.
Oh, you are gonna love it. And I'm so glad we're finally doing this.
- Me too. - Here.
- 我也是 - 我帮你
I really am sorry about, you know, before.
And I wanna make sure you know I really do like you.
Sure, just not as much as clams.
Well, stuffed clams, ha, ha...
- Chocolate torte for the lady. - Mm.
- 小姐的巧克力果仁蛋糕 - 嗯
Cheesecake for the gentleman.
Uh, excuse me, sir. There seems to be some sort of red crap on my cheesecake.
抱歉 我的蛋糕上 好像有红红的怪东西
Oh. Yes, that's a raspberry coulis.
I'm so stupid ordering cheesecake, trying to be healthy.
- I'll just have what she's having. - I'm sorry, sir.
- 我来一份她点的好了 - 抱歉 先生
- That was our last piece. - Mm.
- 那是最后一片 - 额
This is work. I should call in. Can you excuse me?
公司打来的 我得回电 失陪一下好吗？
Oh, yeah, sure. No problem.
What are you doing? I thought you don't share food?
- Coulis? - Ha, ha.
- 水果酱？ - 哈哈
No. If I can't have your clams, you can't have my dessert.
不 我不能吃你的蛤蜊 你也别想碰我的甜点
This is a two-way street.
Now this all better be here when I come back.
Yeah, of course. I can control myself. Ha-ha-ha. Yeah.
Stop staring at me!
Just a tiny little... Ha, ha.
I'm not even sorry.
So these are the preliminary forms for an open adoption. Uh...
There's a lot to go over, but I'll explain as we go through.
- Is that a picture? - Yeah.
- 那是照片吗？ - 对
It's a sonogram they took of the baby last week.
I thought you might wanna see it.
Look, before we sign anything, we really have to talk.
We're not who you think we are.
- I don't understand. - The agency must have made a mistake.
- 我不了解 - 认养机关一定搞错了
My wife is not a reverend, and I'm not a doctor.
- What? - That's impossible.
- 什么？ - 这不可能
I could perform an operation on you and prove it if you'd like.
Um, I have to check your file. Excuse me.
Our names really are Monica and Chandler. We're from New York.
Yeah, but the important thing to know about us...
...is how much we would care for this little baby.
So you lied to me before?
Well, we "bore false witness."
See? I could be a reverend.
I can't believe this.
But we were hoping that since we told you the truth...
...that you still might consider... - Giving you my baby?
你依旧会考虑… - 把宝宝给你们？
You think I'd give you my child after this?
You don't have to decide now. If you look at our file...
I don't wanna look at your file. This is over.
I have nothing to say to you.
Look, you have every reason to be upset. We did lie.
But only because we've been waiting and trying to have a baby for so long.
And we don't know how long it's gonna be before we get another chance.
Why don't you ask the reverend to pray on it?
Just consider us. Ask them to see our file.
Our last name's Bing.
My wife's a chef and I'm in advertising.
I actually liked you guys.
But it doesn't matter. What you did was wrong.
But you did like us.
My wife's an incredible woman.
She is loving, and devoted and caring.
And don't tell her I said this, but the woman's always right.
I love my wife more than anything in this world.
It kills me that I can't give her a baby.
I really want a kid.
And when that day finally comes, I'll learn how to be a good dad.
...she's already there.
She's a mother...
...without a baby.
You still want that baby?
God bless you, Chandler Bing!
Turns out this sweater is made for a woman.
So why are you still wearing it?
- Hey, so how was your date? - Ugh.
- 你的约会还顺利吗？ - 额
Well, looks like it's just the two of us tonight, huh, buddy?
Yeah. And you know what? We could do a lot worse.
- Yeah. - Yeah. Ha-ha-ha.
- 没错 - 没错
Joey doesn't share food!