生活大爆炸 第四季 The Big Bang Theory Season 4 第18集: 魔术小把戏 The Prestidigitation Approximation

上映日期: 2,010

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧

导演: 马克·森卓斯基

演员: 约翰尼·盖尔克奇 / 吉姆·帕森斯 / 凯莉·库柯 / 西蒙·赫尔伯格 / 昆瑙·内亚 / 马伊姆·拜力克 / Gregory Allen Gabroy / 梅丽莎·劳奇 / 阿尔蒂·曼 / 威尔·惠


台词
Morning.
早啊
Morning.
Sleep okay?
睡得好吗
Mm-hmm. Great.
挺好的
Hey, can I ask you something?
我能问你点儿事儿吗
Sure.
问吧
Last night, me wanting to try that stuff out
昨晚我想尝试《性爱宝典》
of the Kama Sutra,
里面的那招
was that fun for you or kinda racially insensitive?
你是觉得有意思呢 还是觉得有种族歧视
Yeah, just because you're in bed with an Indian woman,
就因为你和一位印度女人同床共枕
you think that gives you permission
你就觉得可以
to use crazy positions from an ancient Indian love manual?
使用古印度性爱手册里的狂野体位了吗
Hey, if you can find a book called
喂 你要是能找到一本
Weird Sex With White Boys, I'd be okay with that.
《与白人男孩儿的诡异性爱》 我也没意见
No, no, you have such beautiful eyes.
别戴 你的眼睛这么美
Have you ever thought about getting contacts?
你考虑过戴隐形眼镜吗
I tried in the seventh grade.
我七年级的时候试过
I could never get used to them.
总是戴不习惯
Oh, that's too bad.
真是可惜
Yeah, if I had contacts I would have been
对啊 要是我戴上隐形眼镜 我肯定就是
the coolest debate club president
史上最酷的被关在
ever to be stuffed into his own cello case.
自己大提琴箱里的辩论俱乐部主席了
If you had them on now,
你要是现在戴上
you could see what we're going to do next.
就能看见咱们接下来要做啥了
Th-that's okay. I can infer from context.
没 没关系的 我可以脑补的
Hey, Raj, wanna see a new magic trick I've been working on?
嗨 拉杰 想见识一下我最近练的小魔术吗
Howard, if I may interject here
霍华德 容我插句嘴
with a piece of friendly advice.
给你一条友情建议
Is working on magic tricks
难道你的人生
really how you want to spend your time?
就指着这些魔术小把戏了吗
Granted, you're just an engineer, but...
我知道你只是个工程师 但是
that doesn't mean you might not someday build a geegaw
这并不意味着你不会某天做出一个小把戏
or a thingamabob that may get you a "thank you"
或者小玩意儿能让别人在诺贝尔奖的
in someone else's Nobel Prize acceptance speech.
获奖演说里送你一句"感谢某人"呀
Is the trick making him disappear?
你这魔术能把他变没了吗
Sure, let's see it.
好吧 咱们看看吧
Here, shuffle these.
给 洗一下牌
Okay.
Now spread them out on the table face down.
正面朝下 摊在桌子上
Pick one, look at it.
挑一张 看一眼
Okay.
好的
Now remember your card, put it back in the deck.
记住这张牌 再把它放回去
Is it any wonder he doesn't have a doctorate?
知道为啥他拿不到博士学位了吧
Remind me, what's your birthday?
提醒我一下 你生日是哪天
October sixth.
10月6号
Okay, October is the tenth month.
好的 10月是第10个月份
So ten-- one plus zero is one, plus six is seven.
那么10 1加0等于1 1加6等于7
Turn over the seventh card.
翻开第7张牌
How about that!
我勒个去!
Is that your card?
是你选的那张牌吗
Yes, it is. Very cool!
对 没错 真厉害
It's not cool.
一点都不厉害
It's a childish trick designed
只是个简单的用来
to confuse and intrigue simpletons.
戏弄傻瓜的小把戏而已
How'd you do it?
你是咋弄的
A magician never reveals his secrets.
魔术师是不会透露他的秘密的
But surely a future Nobel Prize winner can figure it out.
但未来的诺奖得主肯定能搞明白的
Fine.
好啊
Give me a second.
让我想想
You ever notice when he thinks real hard, it smells like bacon?
你有没有注意到 每次他认真思考时都会散发培根的味道
- Oh, hey! - Sorry! Oop!
-喂 -不好意思
Sorry! Pardon me!
抱歉 抱歉
Oh, I'm so sorry!
真不好意思
Oh, that was my fault.
都怪我
Check it out.
看吧
I just got contacts.
我戴隐形了
生活大爆炸第四季第十八集
One, two,
一 二
three, four, five.
三 四 五
No way.
不可能吧
That's your card, right?
这张牌就是你挑的 对吧
Seven of clubs!
草花7
That is amazing!
太神奇了
It's not amazing.
一点都不神奇
All magic tricks are merely a combination
魔术小把戏都离不开
of manipulation and misdirection
操纵和误导的窠臼
with the occasional dwarf in a box wiggling his feet.
有时候还会有侏儒藏在箱子里晃腿
Oh, really? So how did I do it?
哦 真的吗 那我是怎么做到的
I don't care how you did it.
我才不在乎你是怎么做到的
I have more important things to think about.
有更重要的问题等着我思考
Clearly, the cards are marked.
显然这些牌上都是有记号的
I thought you had more important things to think about.
我以为你在思考更重要的事儿呢
I do. You just happened
没错 你恰好
to have caught me on a break.
碰见我休息了
Oh, let me see those cards.
让我看看这些牌
Big deal. Not knowing
有啥大不了的 不知道
is part of the fun.
才有乐趣啊
"Not knowing is part of the fun."
"不知道才有乐趣啊"
Was that the motto of your community college?
这是你们社区大学的校训吗
Hey, guys, what do you think?
各位 你们觉得咋样
Priya took me clothes shopping.
普丽娅带我去买衣服了
Hey, you look great.
哇 看起来真不错
Good for you, Priya.
干得好 普丽娅
I could never get that stupid hoodie off him
我怎么样都没法让他不穿那件难看的帽衫
when we were...
在我俩还那啥的时候
Well, you look great.
额 你看起来好帅
Thank you.
多谢
Let's go hang everything up.
咱去把衣服都挂起来吧
Yeah, good.
嗯 好
New contacts.
新隐形眼镜
I should have done this years ago.
我该早几年戴的
So you finally getting used to them doing it on a daily basis?
这么说你终于习惯他俩每天都这样了
I'm not going out with him.
我已经不和他在一起了
He can sleep with whoever he wants.
他想跟谁上床都无所谓
Yeah, I was talking to Raj.
我在和拉杰说话呢
Oopsy.
啊哦
This deck is rigged in some fashion.
这副牌肯定做了手脚
Fine. Get another deck
好吧 换一副牌
and I'll do the trick with that.
我照样能变给你看
So you're saying this is a regulation deck?
你是说这是一副正常的牌吗
I'm saying believe in magic, you muggle.
我是说要相信魔法 你个麻瓜
You know, well, I'm happy Leonard's found someone.
我很高兴莱纳德找到了女友
Not that anybody asked.
虽然没人问起这个
How many Star Trek uniforms do you have?
你有多少件星际迷航的制服
Just two:
就两件
everyday and dress.
常服和礼服各一
Listen, we need to talk about something.
我们得谈谈
Oh, my God, you're breaking up with me!
天哪 你是要跟我分手
Why would you take me out shopping
为什么要带我去买衣服
and then break up with me? That is so cruel!
然后跟我分手 那太残忍了
Leonard, I'm not breaking up with you.
莱纳德 我不是要跟你分手
Oh, okay.
哦 好吧
So, what's up?
那你要谈什么
It's a little weird,
我就觉得怪怪的
your ex-girlfriend hanging out here all the time.
你前女友一天到晚在这玩
I know.
我知道
I usually never see my ex-girlfriends,
我通常跟前女友老死不相往来
unless their hard drives crash.
除非她们的硬盘崩溃
I'm just saying, how would you feel
我只是说 要是我整天
if I was hanging out with my ex-boyfriend?
跟前男友混在一块 你觉得怎样
Um, not great, I guess.
不怎么好 我想
But Penny and I are just friends.
但我和佩妮现在只是朋友
I don't care.
我不管
This is a woman you have slept with.
她曾跟你上过床
If you want her around,
要是你仍想她在眼前晃
then I have to wonder if maybe you're not ready to move on.
那我不得不认为你仍对她旧情难忘
No, no-no-no, I'm ready!
不 不不 我忘了
I gave up the gift of sight for you.
我都为了你宁愿目不能视
If that's not moving on, what is?
这还不算忘了旧情 算什么
You need to cut the cord with Penny.
我想让你跟佩妮彻底断了
Oh... okay.
哦 好的
You don't sound very confident.
你好像不是很有信心
No, no, I'm confident.
不 不 我很有信心
Its not like I'm unfamiliar with the "get lost" conversation.
我很清楚什么叫"我要跟你一刀两断"
Although, this will be the first time I'll be the one saying it.
虽然 这是第一次我跟人这么说
Thank you.
谢谢你
- I appreciate it. - Sure.
-我很感激 -应该的
Oh, God, you smell so good.
天哪 你真香
Of course, that could just be
当然 也有可能是
my other senses getting stronger.
我其他感官更加灵敏了
Hypothetically, if I had access
假设 我能弄到
(《星际迷航》角色 女性)
to a Lieutenant Uhura uniform, would you wear it?
一件乌胡拉中尉的制服 你会穿吗
Leonard, it's a source of great pain to me and my family
莱纳德 这是我和我家人莫大的痛苦
that my brother has that outfit in his wardrobe.
因为我哥衣柜居然有这一套行头
Can we not discuss it?
能不讨论这个吗
I'm sorry. Never mind.
抱歉 别介意
And was your card the jack of diamonds?
你之前拿的牌就是方块J吗
Oh, unbelievable!
难以置信
Know how he did it yet?
知道他怎么做到的了吗
Aw, he has the same look my little nephew gets
嗷 他跟我小侄子一个表情
when he can't figure out how I got his nose.
他想不通为何我鼻子跟他一样时就这样
You know, I have some remedial magic tricks
我还有几个治愈系的小魔术
that might be more your speed.
可能更适合你
Like, ooh, look!
比如 快看
The pencil's rubber!
看这铅笔上的橡皮
Hey, I think I know how you did the card trick.
我想我知道你怎么变的了
Oh, please, if I don't know, you don't know.
拜托 我都不明白 你怎么可能知道
That's axiomatic.
这是不言自明的
Come here.
我说给你听
You're right.
还真给你说对了
Not too bad for someone
对一个不知道什么叫
who doesn't know what "axiomatic" means.
"不言自明"的人来说 还真不赖
What happened with the contacts?
你的隐形眼镜呢
One of them's upstairs.
一个在楼上
The other one sort of slipped back into my skull.
另一个好像已经跑脑袋里了
Hey, is that one of the new shirts Priya got you?
这是普丽娅给你买的新衬衫吗
Yeah.
You don't wanna wash that.
可不能这么洗
- No? - No, that's silk.
-不能吗 -不能 这是丝织品
Seriously, what would you do without me?
老实说 没有我你可怎么办哦
Yeah.
是啊
You know, I gotta tell you, I think
我不得不说 我觉得
- you got a real winner with Priya. - Yeah, me, too.
-你找上普丽娅真是太幸运了 -我也这么想
She seems really sweet.
她真是太可爱了
Believe me, you do not want to take that for granted.
相信我 你可不能觉得理所当然
There are a lot of bitches out there.
外面可有大堆大堆的婊子
Yeah, bitches are the worst.
是啊 找个婊子可就太糟了
All right, I'll see you later.
好了 回见
Uh, Penny, there's something I have to tell you.
佩妮 我有事想跟你说
What?
什么
Okay, uh, how do I put this?
好吧 怎么说呢
Um... are you familiar with Darwin's observation
你了解达尔文在加拉帕戈斯群岛
of the finches in the Galapagos Islands?
考察雀类时的观察法吗
Did they make a movie about it?
有拍电影出来吗
No.
没有
Then no.
那我不了解
All right, well, anyway, Darwin observed that when two groups
好吧 达尔文观察到当两组雀类
of finches competed over the same food source,
去竞争同一种食物来源
eventually one of them would evolve a different beak shape
最终 其中一种会进化出不同的鸟嘴
so they could feed on something else.
从而能以别的东西为食
Okay.
好吧
So what do you think we can learn from that behavior
你觉得我们可以从该行为中学到什么
that we can apply to our own lives?
可以运用于自己生活中的
Uh, a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush?
一鸟在手 胜过二鸟在林?
Sure, that has birds in it.
当然 这话里也有鸟
It's fun talking to you, Leonard; I always learn stuff.
跟你说话真有趣 莱纳德 总学得到东西
I'm sorry, but I'm gonna count that.
抱歉 那就算你答应了
Do you really have to wear that in bed?
你睡觉的时候一定要戴这玩意吗
Yeah. The doctor didn't want me to rub my eye during the night.
对呀 医生怕我睡着之后揉眼睛
It was either this or one of those giant neck cones.
不戴这个 就要戴那种超大的锥形颈圈
So did you get to talk to Penny?
你跟佩妮谈过了吗
Oh, yes. Indeed, I did.
谈了 真的 谈了
And?
结果呢
She completely understood everything I said.
她毫无保留地欣然接受了
Case closed.
妥妥儿的
Was she upset?
她生气了吗
Maybe, but that's not my problem.
也许吧 不过与我无关
She's not my girlfriend, you are.
她不是我女朋友 你才是
I hope you weren't cruel to her.
不要对她太残忍
Is the autumn cruel for letting the flowers die,
那让繁花凋零的到底是秋天的残忍
or is that just nature's way?
还是自然法则呢
Leonard? Leonard? Leonard?
莱纳德 莱纳德 莱纳德
What?!
干嘛
I think I figured out Wolowitz's magic trick,
我参透沃罗威茨的小魔术了
and I need you to pick a card.
我需要你来选一张牌
I am not opening that door, Sheldon!
我不会给你开门的 谢尔顿
As you wish.
如你所愿
Pick a card, put it back,
选一张牌 放回去
and prepare to be amazed.
接下来就是见证奇迹的时刻
Did you pick one?
选好了吗
Yep.
好了
Is this your card?
这是你选的牌吗
Nope.
不是
Drat.
我去
Is this your card?
这张呢
No.
不是
I'll be right back.
我去去就回
Pick a card, Sheldon.
选一张牌 谢尔顿
Now look at it, and put it back in the deck.
瞟一眼 然后放回去
Now do you remember your card?
记住牌面了吗
Of course I do, I have an eidetic memory.
搞笑呢吧 哥的记忆力不是讲笑的
My apologies.
我的错
Now shuffle the cards.
现在洗一下牌
Shuffling.
接着洗
Wait here.
等我一下
Processing image, cross-referencing...
图像处理 交叉引证
Whatcha doin'?
忙什么呢
I'm reverse engineering Wolowitz's magic trick.
我在对沃罗威茨的小魔术进行逆向分析
What's up with the infrared cameras?
红外摄像机能派上什么用场
I'm measuring residual heat levels on the playing cards
通过对扑克牌余热等级的测量
to determine which one's been touched.
可以确定哪张牌被摸过了
By the way,
顺便提醒一下
if you hope to have children,
如果你打算要小宝宝的话
I suggest you switch from briefs to boxers.
我建议你把三角小内内换成四角的
Your testicles look a tad warm.
你的蛋蛋看上去温度略高
Holy crap, are you connected
我勒个去 别告诉我你进入了
to the Oak Ridge National Laboratory?
国立橡树岭研究所的系统
Yes. I'm using their Cray supercomputer
没错 我正在用他们的克雷超级电脑
to analyze shuffling patterns.
分析洗牌的模式
Sheldon, that computer is used for national defense.
谢尔顿 那台电脑是供国防部使用的
Hacking into it is a federal crime.
黑进去相当于刑事犯罪
Relax, we're not under attack right now.
别紧张 现在又没人跟咱们打仗
Okay, I'm leaving before the black helicopters get here.
趁军方直升机没来之前我先出去躲躲
And is this my card?
这张会是我的牌吗
Rats!
大爷的
I wonder if Howard used a radioactive tracer.
我怀疑霍华德用了放射性指示剂
Where am I going to find uranium-235 this time of night?
这么晚了我上哪弄铀-235去啊
Come on, CraigsList.
给力吧 Craigslist
(Craigslist 一个网上大型免费分类广告网站)
Is it racist that I took you to an Indian restaurant?
带你来印度餐厅算是种族歧视吗
It's okay, I like Indian food.
没关系 我喜欢印度菜
Or as you probably call it back home, "food."
或者你可以宾至如归地称它为"菜"
Why didn't you wear your contacts?
你为什么不戴隐形眼镜了
Don't you like them?
不喜欢吗
No, no, I do.
不 不 我喜欢
It's just I knew I was having curry tonight
只是我知道今晚要吃咖喱
and I only want one part of my body to burn at a time.
一个部位的灼痛就够我应付的了
You know...
知道吗
...my company offered me a position here in Los Angeles.
公司向我提供了一个职位 就在洛杉矶
Does that mean you'd relocate here permanently?
那意味着你会在这里定居了吗
Maybe. What do you think?
也许吧 你觉得怎样
I love it.
双手赞成
That's great!
太棒了
Hi!
吃着呢
Hi! Just hang on.
等我一下
Small world.
世界真小啊
You did talk to her, didn't you?
你根本没跟她谈过对吧
Of course, I did. I talked and talked and talked.
当然谈了 我跟她谈啊谈啊谈啊的
Hey! Look at Leonard in his fancy-ass grownup clothes.
莱纳德 瞧你这一身像模像样的成年人打扮
Way to go, Priya. For once, he doesn't look
有你的 普丽娅 这是他第一次
like a mannequin in the boys' department.
打扮得不像男孩服装部的模特
Hey, did he
他有没有告诉你
tell you I saved the silk shirt?
我挽救了那件真丝衬衫
No, he did not.
没有啊
He was gonna throw it in the washing machine
他当时正准备把它扔进洗衣机
with his Spiderman underwear.
和他的蜘蛛侠小内内一起洗呢
That's our Lenny, huh?
这就是咱家莱尼哈
Yes, that's our Lenny.
对 这就是咱家莱尼
So how's the food here?
这里的东西好吃吗
Oh, wow, that is really, really good.
这个真的非常非常好吃
Oh, I'm sorry. You guys are on a date.
抱歉 你们俩约着会呢
We can hang out anytime. Have fun.
咱们有空再聚 吃好喝好
Bye. Good night.
拜拜 晚安
Oh, that's, hot, hot, hot, hot!
辣死了 辣死了 辣死了
Whoo! I really sneaks up on ya, huh?
是不是有被我盯梢的感觉
All right, I gotta go.
好了 我消失
It is pretty spicy.
这个真的很辣
Oh, I've been meaning to tell you,
我一直想告诉你来着
I figured out your magic trick.
你的小魔术我弄明白了
Really?
真的吗
Oh, yes.
那当然
In fact, I improved upon it.
而且我还进行了改进
I'd love to see that.
我很期待啊
How about you, Raj?
你呢 拉杰
Beefaroni and a show?
边吃牛肉通心粉 边看表演
How do you turn that down?
怎么可能拒绝呢
All right.
看好咯
Pick a card.
选张牌
Okay.
好的
Bippity-boppity-boo.
天灵灵地灵灵 扑克牌快显灵
What's with the wand and the beep?
你拿根小黑棒 哔一下是什么意思
The wand is called showmanship,
小黑棒是用来凸显我的表演能力
and the beep is none of your business.
那哔的一声则不关你事
Oh! Excuse me.
抱歉
I'm getting a text message
我刚收到一则
completely unrelated to this magic trick.
跟这魔术没半点关系的短信
Oh, look, my dry cleaning's ready.
我的衣服干洗完了
And your card was the five of spades.
你手里那张牌是黑桃5
Ta-da.
看吧
These cards have barcodes on them.
这些牌上有条形码
The wand is a reader.
那根小黑棒是读码器
It's transmitting to your phone.
能把信息传送到你手机上
I said, "ta-da."
我刚说了 "看吧"
Show's over.
看完就得了
That's pathetic.
这也太悲剧了
Let me show you how a real magician does it.
哥给你演示一下 真正的魔术师是怎么做的
Raj, take a card.
拉杰 选张牌
Don't let me see it.
不要让我看见
Okay.
好的
Three of clubs.
梅花3
Son of a gun,
真他妈给力
you're blowing my mind!
大师果然是大师
Bippity-boppity-boo-yah!
天灵灵地灵灵 大师给你来显灵
That does it. I'm getting uranium.
我受够了 我要去搞点铀
You ever gonna tell him?
你打算告诉他吗
Maybe. When it stops being fun.
或许吧 等哪天玩腻了再说
So never.
那就是永远也不说咯
Oh, hey, I was just on my way to work.
我刚准备去上班
Oh, okay, its not important.
没事 这事不重要
It can wait.
以后再说吧
No, it's all right. Walk me down.
没关系 边下楼边说吧
So, what's up?
什么事
Uh, I kind of have a problem
我遇到一个难题
I was hoping you could help me with.
希望你能帮我解决
Sure, anything.
当然 尽管说吧
Move out.
搬出去
What?
什么
Not far.
不用搬太远
Hey, if you ever wanna start a family,
如果你想组建家庭
La Canada has some great schools.
拉肯纳达那边有一些不错的学校[美国加州]
Okay, I'm not moving anywhere.
够了 我哪儿也不去
What the hell is this all about?
这到底是因为什么
Why does it have to be about anything?
为什么就一定要有原因吗
Can't a fella ask his buddy to relocate,
一个人请求他的伙伴搬家
no questions asked?
就不能毫无疑问地走吗
Oh, for God's sake, Leonard,
看在上帝的份上 莱纳德
this is about Priya, isn't it?
这是因为普丽娅 对吗
She doesn't want me hanging out with you.
她不想我老跟你一起玩
Yes. There, I said it.
对 就是这句 我终于说出口了
Okay, look.
好吧 听着
I happen to like your girlfriend.
我碰巧喜欢你的女朋友
And she likes you.
她也喜欢你
No, she doesn't.
不 她不喜欢我
Not really, no.
是不怎么喜欢
It doesn't matter. Look, I promise from now on
没关系 我保证从今以后
I will keep my distance from you.
我会跟你保持距离
Well, now, hold on.
呃 先等等
What kind of distance are we talking about?
你说的距离是指哪种
Because we are neighbors.
因为我们是邻居
I mean, I can hear the toilet flush in your apartment.
我可是那种能听见你公寓马桶冲水声的邻居
You can hear my toilet flush?
你还能听见我的马桶冲水声
I don't listen for it, but it's nice to know
我不是故意去听 不过很高兴知道
everything's okay with your plumbing.
你的排水管道一切都好
The building's plumbing.
还有这栋楼的排水管道
Leonard, I get it.
莱纳德 我懂的
You're in a new relationship now.
你现在处于一段新的恋爱
And I'm happy for you.
我为你感到高兴
So why don't we just shake hands and part friends?
为什么我们不能握个手 好聚好散呢
Well, now hold on.
呃 先等等
How about this?
这样如何
How about we still hang out, but on the down-low?
我们还可以一起玩 不过是地下的
Are you really that kind of guy?
你真的是那种人吗
No.
不是
I actually felt kinda silly just saying "on the down-low."
其实当我说出"地下"这词儿的时候 我觉得有点犯傻
Good-bye, Leonard.
再见 莱纳德
Penny, wait.
佩妮 等等
Damn contacts.
去你的隐形眼镜
Incoming.
他来了
- Hi! - Hey!
-嗨 -嘿
Hello.
你们好
Why so glum, chum?
为什么这么闷闷不乐 哥们儿
Apparently, you can't hack into a government supercomputer
显然 你不能在美国国家安全局
and then try to buy uranium
给你妈妈打小报告的情况下
without the Department of Homeland Security tattling
入侵政府的超级电脑
to your mother.
还试图在上面买铀
Oh, that's too bad.
这真是太糟糕了
Figure out the magic trick yet?
想明白这魔术的原理了吗
Figure out the magic trick yet?
想明白这狗屁魔术的原理了吗
Want me to tell you how to do it?
要我来告诉你怎么做到的吗
No.
不用
I'll show you one more time.
哥再给你耍一次
Raj?
拉杰
Hang on.
慢着
This time do it with me,
这次由我来抽牌
so I can make sure there's no monkey business.
这样我才能确保其中没有猫腻
All right.
好的
- Two of hearts. - I hate you.
-红桃2 -我恨你
Yeah, he's gonna win the Nobel Prize.
这样下去 诺贝尔奖非他莫属