生活大爆炸 第五季 The Big Bang Theory Season 5 第2集: 虫害假说 The Infestation Hypothesis

上映日期: 2,011

语言: 英语

影片类型: 喜剧

导演: 马克·森卓斯基

演员: 约翰尼·盖尔克奇 / 吉姆·帕森斯 / 凯莉·库柯 / 西蒙·赫尔伯格 / 昆瑙·内亚 / 马伊姆·拜力克 / 阿尔蒂·曼 / 梅丽莎·劳奇


台词
What are you doing?
你干嘛呢
Oh, uh, Priya's calling in a few minutes on Skype,
普丽娅一会要跟我用Skype视频
and we are gonna have a dinner date.
我们准备共进晚餐
It's 8 o'clock in the morning in Mumbai.
现在是孟买时间早上八点
How can she have dinner?
她怎么就吃起晚饭来了
Fine, whatever.
好吧 随你怎么说
Priya will be having breakfast.
那普丽娅就吃早餐好了
All right, so technically it's not a dinner date.
好吧 所以严格来讲你们俩不是共进晚餐
I suppose you could call it a, uh, dinfast date.
也许你勉强可以把这称为共进早晚餐
But if you did, you'd open yourself
不过你要是真这么叫的话
to peer-based mocking, such as,
你肯定会被别人笑死 人家肯定会说
"Hey, Leonard, how was your dinfast with Priya last night?"
莱纳德 你昨晚跟普丽娅的早晚餐吃的好吗
That doesn't sound like mocking.
听起来不像是在笑话我呀
You didn't let me finish.
我还没说完呢
Dinfast.
早晚餐
Are those soy-based candles?
那是大豆蜡的蜡烛吗
I don't know. Why?
不知道 怎么了
Paraffin candles may contain carcinogens.
石蜡蜡烛可能含有致癌物
Unless lung cancer is the ambiance
当然啦 你要是想吃顿早晚餐
you were going for at your dinfast.
还搭上肺癌的话 我也不拦你
Dinfast.
早晚餐
Listen, I don't want to be rude,
我不想无礼
but Priya's gonna be calling any minute, so...
可是普丽娅随时都会打来
Oh, yes, Priya.
对哦 普丽娅
Leonard, you know I make a point of
莱纳德 你知道我从来
never interfering in your personal affairs.
都不干涉你的私事
Yes, I've always admired that about you.
没错 我也一直很欣赏你这点
As well you should.
那是当然
But I'm going to make an exception here.
但是我这次要破例了
Oh, good.
又来了
Priya has moved back to India to pursue her law career.
普丽娅回印度去发展自己的法律事业
Instead of desperately trying
你与其花这些时间绝望地挣扎
to keep this intercontinental relationship alive,
费劲心思地保持这段跨洲恋情
you could use that time to take up a hobby.
你还不如找点别的兴趣爱好呢
A hobby?
兴趣爱好
Yes.
没错
I read recently about a fellow in Kansas
我最近得知堪萨斯州一个家伙
with an enormous ball of twine.
拿麻绳团了一个巨大的球
I bet you could give him a run for his money.
我认为你可以跟他一比高下
You know, some people might say that it's great
你知道吗 有些人可能会说
that we're trying to make things work long distance.
我们俩保持这种异地恋是精神可嘉的事
They'd say things like,
他们会说
"Love is stronger than the miles between you".
爱情不会被你们俩之间的距离所打败
When I rise to power, those people will be sterilized.
等有一天我掌权了 我肯定会灭掉这帮人
You video-chat with Amy all the time.
你也整天跟艾米视频呀
How is this different?
咱俩干的事有什么不同
Don't you like Amy?
你不喜欢艾米吗
Of course I like Amy.
我当然喜欢艾米啦
Well, there's the difference.
可我不喜欢普丽娅呀
Excuse me, that's Priya.
不好意思 普丽娅打来了
Hi, Leonard.
莱纳德
Hey, honey.
亲爱的
I miss you.
我好想你
Oh, I miss you, too.
我也好想你
I miss the old days when your romantic partners
我怀念以前爱情伴侣们
could be returned to the video store.
能退回录像店的日子
Thanks for letting me stay here
谢谢你让我待在这
while Leonard Skypes with his girlfriend.
这样我就不用看着莱纳德跟他女朋友视频了
Oh, it's no problem.
小意思
It's actually kind of nice.
这种感觉还挺不错的呢
You reading, me reading.
你在看书 我也在看书
We're like an old married couple.
咱俩就像一对老夫老妻似的
If we were an old married couple,
咱俩要真是老夫老妻的话
the wife would serve iced tea and snickerdoodles.
妻子这个时候就会端上冻柠茶和曲奇饼了
I don't have iced tea and snickerdoodles.
我家没有冻柠茶和曲奇饼
A good wife would go to the store.
尽职的妻子就会去商店买
I want a divorce.
我要离婚
Good. On the way to see the lawyer,
很好 你去找律师的路上
pick up some tea and cookies.
别忘了买点冻柠茶和曲奇饼
I must say, I am enjoying your new chair.
我还真得说 我挺喜欢你这张新椅子的
It's great, isn't it?
舒服吧
It is.
没错
Aligns the lumbar,
符合腰椎曲线
cradles the coccyx, balances the buttocks.
支撑住了尾骨 还平衡了臀部
This is a chair worthy of the name.
这椅子还真对得起它的名字
What name?
什么名字
Chair.
椅子呀
Oh, all right, well, I'm glad you like it.
好吧 你喜欢就好
I mean, I still can't get over the fact
我还是想不通
someone just threw it away.
怎么有人就忍心把它给扔了呢
What?
你说什么
Yeah, it was just sitting on the street.
就是说呀 这椅子就被丢在路上
I paid a homeless guy ten bucks to help me get it up here.
我给了个流浪汉十块钱 让他帮我把这张椅子搬上来的
Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
哦天呐 哦天呐
What is wrong?
你怎么啦
I've been sitting in garbage!
我刚坐在垃圾上了
Sheldon, take it easy.
谢尔顿 淡定嘛
You take it easy! I need to use your shower.
你去淡定吧 我得去趟浴室
I went into this marriage with so much hope.
我当年结婚的时候还是太过乐观了
There's a wet Band-Aid on the shower floor!
浴室地板上有张湿创口贴
本字幕由 YYeTs人人影视 翻译制作更多美剧原创翻译 请登陆 www.YYeTs.com
翻译:MADD 小蛮腰 海因里希 米小勒 Joanna
后期:孤帆 时间轴:珍珍 YY
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生活大爆炸 第五季第二集
This is fun.
真有意思
I've never used a hydraulic thermoforming press before.
我还从来没用过热成型液压机呢
Pretty sweet, huh?
很赞吧
This little baby set the university back 175 grand.
这个小玩意儿花了学校十七万五千刀
That's three minutes.
三分钟到了
- Shall we see what we got? -Hang on
-让我们看看成果如何 -马上好
Oh, yeah.
哦也
This is one good-looking panini.
这真是个有型的三明治
Hand me the tuna melt.
把金枪鱼三明治给我
- Yep. - Thank you.
-给 -多谢
How's it going with the long-distance love affair?
你那跨国异地恋怎么样啦
Not easy, but we're making it work.
不容易啊 但我俩正在努力
When you say "Making it work," does that include doing the cyber nasty?
你这句"正在努力"包不包括玩些线上耍流氓啊
What?
什么
You know, the virtual pickle tickle.
你懂的 就是虚拟的很黄很暴力的那种啊
The digital... bow-chicka-bow-bow.
数字化的嘿嘿咻咻
Come on, dude. This is my sister you're talking about.
拜托 伙计 你在说我妹啊
Hey, Leonard jiggling his junk at her
喂 对你来说
through a webcam has got to be easier for you to deal with
莱纳德在摄像头里对着她抖那货
than him actually touching her with it.
总要好过他当着她的面拿那货戳她吧
There's no junk jiggling.
我没那么猥琐
We just talk.
我们就是聊天而已
Are you sane?
你疯了吧
With high-speed Internet, you have at your fingertips
有了高速互联网 你的指尖下
the greatest advancement in the field of sex
就是继小手帕之后性爱领域的
注: 小手帕是撸sir之友
since the invention of the washcloth.
最伟大的进步啊
I can't do that.
我不能那么做
Well, if you don't,
好吧 你要是不这么做
you're gonna lose Priya to some fancy guy in a turban
你就是把普丽娅拱手让给某个
who grew up with Kama Sutra coloring books.
从小看《印度爱经》插图版长大的头巾男了
How can you be so racist?
你怎么能这么种族歧视呢
Oh, come on, tell me I'm wrong.
拜托 我哪句说错了
Oh, Leonard, good.
莱纳德 很好
There you are.
找到你了
I need you to check my head for chair lice.
我需要你来检查我头上有没有虱子
I did it last night, I'm not doing it again.
我昨晚查过了 我不能再犯傻了
Just his head, right?
没检查别的地儿 对吧
I don't want to talk about it.
我不想聊这事儿
You didn't catch bugs from Penny's chair.
佩妮椅子上的虫子没跑到你身上
Yes, I did.
不对 有虫子
And now they're cavorting at the base of my hair follicles
现在它们在我的发根毛囊里欢呼雀跃
like dancing hippies at the Redwood National Forest.
就像在红木国家森林公园里跳舞
Sheldon, you do this all the time.
谢尔顿 你老是这样
You fixate on some crazy idea
你总是纠结于某个傻乎乎的想法
and then blow it way out of proportion.
然后无限制地放大
Name one time I've ever done that.
请举一个例子
How about when you put GPS trackers in your garbage
比如上次你把GPS追踪器放进垃圾桶里
because you were convinced North Korean spies
就因为你坚信朝鲜间谍
were stealing your doodles?
在偷你的草稿纸
The chicken nuggets you were sure were human nuggets.
还有你坚信是人肉做的鸡块
The strangely-shaped cloud that was following you around town.
还有那朵奇形怪状的在城里老跟踪你的云
The time you put on my shirt by mistake
还有那次你错穿了我的T恤
and were convinced you'd started growing again.
还以为自己又开始长个儿了
I said, "Name one."
我说的是 "举一个例子"
You really need to work on your listening skills.
你的听力真得练练了
Penny.
佩妮
Penny. Penny.
佩妮 佩妮
Yello.
乃好[你好]
You need to remove that chair from the building.
你得把那个椅子从楼里搬出去
It's a health hazard.
它是个卫生隐患
Okay, relax. I took off the slipcovers,
好吧 淡定吧 我把家具套给拆下来
had them dry-cleaned and then fumigated the cushions.
送去干洗了 坐垫也熏蒸消毒了
Really?
真的吗
Yeah. It's cleaner than my couch.
必须的 它现在比我的沙发还干净
Found half a Hot Pocket in there.
我还在里面找到了半个鸡蛋灌饼呢
It certainly looks okay.
看起来还不错
Has a strong toxic chemical smell.
有一股强烈的有毒化学药剂味
That's reassuring.
真让人安心啊
Why don't you give it a try, Sheldon?
坐上去试试呗 谢尔顿
All right.
好吧
It is a comfortable chair.
这椅子挺舒服
Why don't you just admit you overreacted?
你为啥不承认你之前反应过激了呢
No, thank you.
不必了 多谢
It's like living with a Chihuahua.
简直像跟个吉娃娃一起住一样
Penny. Penny. Penny.
佩妮 佩妮 佩妮
What's up, buttercup?
有事吗 小毛孩
You have to get rid of the chair.
你必须把那椅子扔了
Nope.
Penny. Penny. Penny.
佩妮 佩妮 佩妮
What's the word, hummingbird?
想叽歪啥呀 小蜂鸟
For your safety, please wait in my apartment
为你安全考量 请到我们那等着
as I call the authorities so they may remove the chair of death.
让我报警请他们搬走这死亡之椅
No.
不要
Penny! Penny! Penny!
佩妮 佩妮 佩妮
What's the gist, physicist?
有何指示 小物理学家
Under my authority as a self-appointed member
作为本街道疾控中心
of the Centers for Disease Control street team...
自封的一员 我宣布
...these premises are condemned.
此房屋应报废
As a man with a keen sense of style,
作为有着敏锐时尚感的达人
I must tell you, that chair does not work with the room.
我必须说 那椅子跟你家一点都不配
Penny!
佩妮
Penny!
佩妮
Penny.
佩妮
So, here we are.
好了
Back in bed together.
我们一起回房上床了
Yep, here we are.
是的 一起上床了
Okay, so I-I guess I'll just jump right in.
好了 那我来直入主题吧
All right.
好的
Uh, you're a naughty girl.
呃 你是个淘气的坏女孩
And-And, uh, I-I want to punish you with my love?
我 我 要 要用爱来鞭挞你
What?
搞毛啊
Not good?
不好吗
That's terrible. Try again.
太可怕了 再来
Okay.
好的
Uh, uh, you're... not naughty.
你...你一点都不淘气
Uh, you're-you're-you're dirty.
你 你是下流
You're...
你是...
You're a-a dirty girl?
你是下流的坏女孩
Oh, yes.
Yes, I am.
对 下流之极
Yeah, yeah. Uh, okay.
好好 我摸懂门道了
You're a, you're a...
你 你是个...
You're a-a dirty...
你是一个 一个下流
disgusting...
淫秽
revolting girl.
叛逆的女孩
God, Leonard, stop talking.
天啊 莱纳德 求你闭嘴吧
Why don't you just give me five minutes?
不然等我五分钟先
I'll Google how to do this. I'll call you right back.
我谷歌一下流程 马上打回给你
Shh-shh-shh. Just be quiet and do what I tell you.
嘘嘘嘘 你闭嘴听我命令行事
Okay, like usual. Good.
好吧 一如既往 真好
Take off your shirt.
脱掉上衣
All rightie. Shirt coming off.
好的 脱掉我的小上衣
Ta-da! Man nipples.
哇啦 男士小咪咪哦
- I said be quiet.- Yes, ma'am.
-我说了闭嘴 -是 长官
Now take off your shorts.
现在脱掉你的短裤
Taking shorts off.
小裤衩 脱掉
There we go.
好了
Naked, naked, naked!
赤裸裸 光溜溜 滑嫩嫩
Wonderful.
好极了
Now I'll take off my clothes.
现在轮到我脱了
Cool.
Here I am, baby.
你看 宝贝
You miss these?
你想它们了吗
Oh, damn it!
靠 见鬼
Oh, Leonard! Already?!
哦 莱纳德 这就缴械了?!
No, no! No-no-no!
不 不 不是这样的
The screen froze.
我屏幕不动了
It's probably just buffering
可能还在缓冲
Just give it a second.
你稍等等嘛
Fine.
好吧
So, how are your mom and dad?
你父母还好吗
Yeah, I really don't want to talk about my parents now.
我现在真的不想谈论我父母
Yeah. Sure, sure.
好的 当然当然
If your video's frozen,
如果你的视频卡住了
try resetting the TCP/IP stack.
试着重新设置下TCP/IP堆栈
I didn't even think of that. Thanks.
我怎么没想到 谢了
You're welcome. Please let me know when
不客气 但请一定通知一声
you and your girlfriend are done
等你和你的女友
hogging the bandwidth for your self-abuse.
不再占着带宽撸管
Netflix:世界上最大的在线影片租赁提供商
I'm trying to stream a movie on Netflix in here.
我打算要在Netflix上看部电影呢
Five, six, seven, eight.
五 六 七 八
*Tall and tan and young and lovely *
*高挑 黝黑 年轻 可爱*
*The girl from Ipanema goes walking*
*来自依帕内玛的女孩翩翩而来*
*And when she passes, each one she passes goes... *
*当她走过时 每个遇见的人都...*
Amy? Amy? Amy?
艾米 艾米 艾米
*Oh... *
*哦...*
You are aware that your ritualistic knocking behavior is
你应该注意到你习惯的敲门行为
symptomatic of obsessive-compulsive disorder.
是一种强迫症紊乱的表象
Is not.
这不是
Is not, is not.
不是 不是
Denial. Denial, denial. Come in.
抵赖抵赖你就抵赖吧 请进
Thank you.
谢谢
Would you like to hear me play a bossa nova standard on the harp?
你想听我用竖琴弹奏波萨诺伐舞曲吗
No.
不想
How about the theme song
要不然我换首
to the classic television show Diff'rent Strokes?
经典电视剧《Diff'rent冲程》的主题曲吧
* Now the world don't move to the beat...*
* 如今的世界已经不再跟着节奏走... *
No.
不想
Well, that's every song I know. What's up?
好吧 我就会这么几首了 什么事
You're good friends with Penny, right?
你和佩妮是好朋友对吧
Best friends, besties,
好朋友 闺蜜
BFFs, peas in a pod,
永远的好友 亲如同胞姐妹
sisters who would share traveling pants.
亲得可以穿一条裤子
Go on.
你继续
I was hoping she might listen to you
我是希望她可以听听你的意见
about the dangers of owning unhygienic furniture.
知道把不干净家具带回家的危险
For general educational purposes,
你这是作为一般教育用途
or has she acquired a bar stool dipped in cholera?
还是她顺了个浸在霍乱病毒中的酒吧凳回来
Cholera is water-borne.
霍乱是饮水传染的
- You're mocking me. - Yes, I am.
-你这是在嘲笑我 -没错
Penny has dragged a chair in off the street
佩妮从大街上拿回了个椅子
whose unknown provenance jeopardizes the health and welfare
这种出处不详的椅子 会危害我们楼里
of every resident in our building.
每位住户的健康和幸福的
Sheldon, just because you have a focus on
谢尔顿 不能就因为你
cleanliness bordering on the psychotic
有神经病一样的洁癖
doesn't mean I have to participate.
我也得被你拉下水吧
All right, name your price.
好吧 你出个价
Kiss me where I've never been kissed before.
亲我从未被人亲过的地方
You mean like Salt Lake City?
你是说类似盐湖城的地方吗
Never mind. I'll talk to Penny.
算了 我会跟佩妮说的
Thank you.
谢谢
Will you listen to me play my harp now?
那现在听我演奏竖琴好吗
No. I dislike the sound of the harp.
不要 我不喜欢竖琴的声音
Its overuse in classic television sitcoms
竖琴在经典电视情景喜剧中的过度使用
always makes me think I'm going to
每每让我觉得
experience an episode from my past.
我过去的噩梦又再度上演了
I'm sorry, Mommy. Don't be mad at me.
对不起 妈咪 别生我的气
Don't do that!
别弹了
I don't know about this, Howard.
我不懂的 霍华德
What? You're having trouble with the long-distance lovemaking.
什么 你对远程做爱有障碍吗
This is your answer.
这就是你的法宝
There are two interfaces that simulate a human mouth.
上面有两个端口能刺激嘴部
You have one, Priya has one in India.
你这配一个 在印度的普莉娅配一个
When you move your lips and tongue on yours,
你只要移动你的嘴唇和舌头
it transmits exactly what you're doing to hers.
就能传输信号 感觉像是你真的在吻她
See? Internet kissing.
看见没 网络亲吻
Give it a try.
来试试
I don't think so.
还是算了
I'll try it.
我来试试
Like this?
像这样吗
Almost. Really get your tongue in there.
差不多 把你的舌头伸进去
to activate the motion sensor.
激活感应器
Like this?
像这样吗
Close. Really French it.
差不多了 要法式舌吻
Better?
好点了吗
Yeah, you got it, you got it.
对 就这样 太正点了
I'm impressed. This is very lifelike.
我震精了 这感觉太逼真了
Whoa! You just bit my tongue!
擦 你居然咬我舌头
I-I nibbled. I was being playful.
轻咬而已 我只想多点情趣
Why do you have to make everything weird?
你干嘛要把一切都搞得这么猥琐
Sorry.
抱歉
Better?
好点了吗
Oh, yeah.
正点
Pretty cool, huh?
很不错哈
Probably would cost, like, 200 bucks in a store.
商店里买的话没准要两百块
I do appreciate a bargain.
是很划算
This entire ensemble once belonged to my dead grandmother.
我去世的奶奶以前有一套这种家具
You're kidding.
不是吧
Everything except bra and panties.
除了内衣内裤什么都分享了
维多利亚的秘密 内衣品牌
And they're a leopard-spotted secret I share with Victoria.
这可是我和维多利亚之间的独家小秘密哟
And now me.
而现在是和我了
I just have one question about the chair.
对这沙发椅我只有一个问题
And what's that?
什么
Aren't you worried about it being unhygienic?
你就不担心这个不卫生吗
No, it's completely fine...
不 完全没有...
Hmm. I get it.
我懂了
Sheldon sent you.
是谢尔顿
He put you up to this.
是他让你来找我
- No, he didn't. - Really?
-不 他没有 -真的吗
Yes, he did. He absolutely did.
是的 他有 就是他
My God, Amy, that's really crappy of you.
天啊 艾米 你太不够朋友了
It is?
真的吗
Yeah! Letting Sheldon use you to manipulate me?
当然 你让谢尔顿利用你来操控我
I thought you were my friend.
我还以为我们是朋友
No, I am your friend. Please don't be mad at me.
不 我们是朋友 请别生我气
I can't even believe this.
我简直难以置信
You know, maybe you should just go.
你最好还是走吧
No! No, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
不 对不起 真的很对不起
I take it all back!
我把刚才的话都收回
Look! I'm, uh, I'm sitting in your chair.
看 我坐在你的沙发椅上
There's nothing wrong with it.
完全没问题
It's a great chair.
这椅子棒极了
Please let me continue to be part of your world.
求你别把我踢出你的生活
What's wrong?
怎么了
Something in the chair's biting my tushy.
椅子里有什么东西在咬我的臀部
It's not important. Ow!
但这无所谓
Wait. Get up, get up!
快站起来
Swear you won't tell Sheldon what happened!
发誓你不会把这事告诉谢尔顿
I swear!
我发誓
Can I tell my doctor? I'm probably gonna need shots!
我能告诉我医生吗 我觉得我得去打针
Yeah, sure!
当然可以
Oh, hey, babe, I think I figured this thing out.
宝贝儿 我觉得我已经懂了
Oh, Leonard, listen...
莱纳德 先听我说
No, you listen!
不 你给我听好
You're my woman,
你是我的妞
and I'm gonna make you feel things you have never felt before.
我要给你前所未有的快感
Leonard...
莱纳德
That's right, say my name...
就是这样 用力叫出我的名字
and beg me for more, 'cause...
求我 求我再快点
I'm gonna give it to you.
我会努力让你达到巅峰
My parents are here.
我父母在旁边
Hello, Leonard...
你好 莱纳德
if I may also say your name.
我也能咬牙切齿用力喊你的名字吗
Check it out. Free chair.
看呀 从天而降的沙发椅
Yeah.
可不是
Hey, you know, if this was in Sheldon and Leonard's apartment,
要是谢尔顿和莱纳德的公寓里有个沙发椅
I wouldn't wind up sitting on the floor all the time.
我就不用老是坐在地板上了
On three?
来吗
- Three! - Three!
-一二三 -抬
What kind of idiot throws away
哪个二货舍得扔掉这么好的沙发椅哟