生活大爆炸第五季双语台词对白剧本

So, I got the craziest e-mail this morning.

我今天收到了一封超牛叉的邮件

I don't mean to burst your bubble, dude,

哥们儿不是我要泼你冷水

but those penile enlargement pills do not work.

但那些阴茎增大丸真心不管用啊

Believe me, I know.

相信我我懂的

The e-mail I got was from the office of Stephen Hawking.

那封邮件是来自史蒂芬·霍金的办公室

- You're kidding. - Why?

-不可能吧 -为啥

He's coming to the university for a couple weeks to lecture,

他要来我们学校讲几周的课

and he's looking for an engineer to help maintain

所以想找个工程师来帮他

the equipment on his wheelchair.

维护轮椅上的设备

That's amazing.

太赞了

You'll be like his pit crew.

你就是他的赛车维修员啊

A word of caution: I would not do

提醒你一下我可不会

your Stephen Hawking impression in front of him.

在他面前模仿他说话

You're right.

你说得对

I suppose that could be considered offensive.

我觉得这么做是挺没礼貌的

Boy, Sheldon's going to freak out.

伙计谢尔顿会疯掉的

Yeah, he worships Hawking.

是啊他特别崇拜霍金

I was actually thinking about bringing him along

我其实有考虑带他过去

when I go over there so he can meet the great man.

好让他见见自己的偶像

That's really nice of you, Howard.

你真是个大善人啊霍华德

It's no big deal.

举手之劳啦

Boy, a restraining order from Stephen Hawking.

天啊霍金也会去申请一张限制令的吧

It'll look so nice next to the ones he's already got

加上莱纳德·尼莫伊卡尔·萨根

三人依次为《星际迷航》史波克扮演者、著名天文学家美国漫画大师作品包括《蜘蛛侠》《神奇四侠》等

from Leonard Nimoy, Carl Sagan and Stan Lee.

和斯坦·李对他的限制令硕果累累呀

Leonard, do you recall when I said

莱纳德你还记得有一次我说

that I was going to revolutionize humanity's understanding

我将彻底改变人们对希格斯玻色子的理解

of the Higgs boson particle, and you said,

然后你说

"Sheldon, it's 2:00 a.m., get out of my bedroom"?

"谢尔顿现在是凌晨两点滚出我的卧室"吗

Like it was ten hours ago.

不就是今天凌晨吗

What about it?

怎么了

Well, I believe I've done it.

我觉得我成功了

And I'm only saying "believe" to sound modest,

我说"我觉得"只是为表谦虚

because, sweet Sam Houston, I did it.

因为感谢上帝我成功了

- Really? - That's incredible. Oh, here.

-真的假的 -太牛了给

Break out the math.

式子列给我们看看

Oh, okay, let me see this.

行我看看

All right, so this particle here

看这个粒子

is the boson moving forward in time.

是随时间演化的玻色子

Now, I was thinking...

我之前考虑的是...

Howard, you go ahead and eat.

霍华德你就先吃吧

This isn't going to make any sense to you.

你肯定一点儿都听不懂

Sheldon, I have a working understanding of physics.

谢尔顿我对物理还是懂不少的

Yeah, good for you, and don't stop working on it.

是吗很好继续努力

Are you still going to tell him

你还打算跟他说

- about you-know-who? - Yep.

-那个人的事吗 -说啊

Are you still going to introduce him?

那你还打算引见他吗

Not on your life.

这辈子都别想了

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本字幕由 YYeTs人人影视翻译制作更多美剧原创翻译请登陆 www.YYeTs.com

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翻译：MADD Tina 小蛮腰 Joanna

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后期：LL 时间轴：YY

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校对：奥列格赛苏菲猫总监：YY

生活大爆炸第五季第二十一集

Please, please, please,

求你了求你了求你了嘛

let me meet Hawking.

让我见见霍金吧

I told you, no.

我都说了不行了

But I said I'm sorry.

可我都道歉了

No, you said, "Would it help if I said I'm sorry?"

不对你说的是"要是我道歉管用吗"

And you never answered me.

然后你都没回应我

So who owes whom an apology now?

瞧现在该道歉的是谁

Sheldon, you're a condescending jerk.

谢尔顿你是个傲慢的混蛋

Why on earth would I want to do something nice for you?

我干嘛要帮你这种人的忙呀

To go to Jewish heaven?

死后好上犹太天堂吗

犹太教圣经不包含基督教新约所展现的天堂地狱观

Jews don't have heaven.

犹太人没有天堂

Then to avoid Jewish hell?

那是为了避免下犹太地狱吗

Have you met my mother?

你见过我妈吗吧

I live in Jewish hell.

我不住地狱谁算住地狱

Howard, please.

霍华德求求你了

This is Stephen Hawking.

这可是史蒂芬·霍金啊

Perhaps my only intellectual equal.

也许是唯一一个智商和我相当的人

Oh, you can't be serious.

你别搞笑了

Try to put yourself in my place.

你设身处地地替我想想

Imagine you're the sole human being

假设你的星球都是狗狗

living on a planet populated with nothing but dogs.

而你是唯一一个人类

And then it turns out

然后突然发现

there's another human being.

这星球上还有一个人类

Hang on.

打住

Are you saying the rest of us are dogs?

你是说除了你俩其他人都是狗狗吗

Okay, I can see you're going to take this the wrong way.

好吧我就知道你会误解我的意思

Let me try again.

我换个说法吧

Imagine you're the sole human being

假设你的星球都是大猩猩

living on a planet populated with nothing but chimps.

而你是唯一一个人类

Get out of my lab.

滚出去

Oh, now they're so much smarter than dogs.

大猩猩比狗狗聪明多了

Have you seen them on those little bicycles?

你见过它们骑小自行车吗

Get out.

出去

How about dolphins?

那换成海豚好不

Out!

滚

So, come on, how was the first day with Hawking?

说吧跟霍金度过的第一天感觉如何

It was great.

超赞的

We talked about movies...

我们聊了电影

Oh...

神啊

I showed him some card tricks...

我给他变了几个扑克牌魔术

Oh!

神啊

He even let me read a couple pages from his new book.

他还让我给他念了几页他的新书

Oh!

神啊

Something got you down there, bunky?

什么事让你这么失望呀亲爱的

Howard, please, I'm begging you.

霍华德求求你了

Raj, you're our group historian.

拉杰你是咱们这帮人里记性最好的

Has Sheldon ever begged before?

谢尔顿以前求过人吗

Three times.

求过三次

He begged the Fox network not to cancel Firefly.

他求过福克斯电视网不要砍掉《萤火虫》

He begged the TNT network to cancel Babylon 5.

他求过TNT电视网砍掉《巴比伦五号》

And when he got food poisoning at the Rose Bowl Parade,

他在玫瑰碗橄榄球赛游行时食物中毒

he begged a deity he doesn't believe in

还求过一个他不信奉的神

to end his life quickly.

让他死得痛快

Do you understand how important Hawking is to me?

你知道霍金对我来说有多重要吗

When I was six years old,

我六岁的时候

I dressed up as him for Halloween.

万圣节扮的就是他

You're kidding.

开玩笑的吧

No, sir, no, I took my dad's desk chair,

绝对没有我拿了我爸的写字椅

attached a Speak & Spell to it

装上一个拼说语音学习机

and made my sister push me up and down the block

然后让我妹妹推我去街上

to trick or treat.

讨糖吃

Granted most people thought I was R2-D2,

大部分人都以为我在扮R2-D2

星球大战里的机器人

but still, I got a lot of candy.

但我还是讨到很多糖

You don't seem to be understanding

你好像不太懂

the English word "no."

英语的"NO"

Maybe a different language will help.

或者换其他语言比较好

Russian: nyet.

俄语 Nyet

Chinese: bu.

中文不

Japanese: iie.

日语いいえ

Klingon: qo'.

克林贡语 qo'

Binary coded Ascii:0110111001101111.

二进制ASCII码 0110111001101111

- It's actually 01100111. - No!

-应该是01100111 -不行

I'm not asking for me,

我不是为自己求你

I'm asking for Hawking.

我是为了霍金求你

Let me try gangsta: Hells naw.

试试黑帮用语去你丫的

Okay, look, how about this?

好吧要不这样

Just give him my paper on the Higgs boson.

把我的希格斯粒子论文给他

If he sees the incredible breakthrough I've made,

如果他看出我所做的伟大突破

he'll reach out to me.

他会主动联系我

What if he doesn't?

要是他不联系你呢

He will; he's really smart.

他会的他可聪明了

That's an interesting idea.

这个主意有意思

Why don't you give me a minute

要不你给我几分钟

to talk it over with my friends?

让我跟我的朋友商量一下

- How do I do that? - You walk away.

-我要怎么做 -赶紧消失

Walking away.

我这就闪

You do realize you own his ass right now.

你要知道你现在就是他的老大

I do.

我知道

You can make him do anything you want.

你可以把他当狗使唤

Yeah, I know, I'm just trying to figure out

我知道我只是在想

how much I want to punish him.

我要把他整得多惨

Well, don't be too mean.

别太过分意思一下

Hey, fellas,

伙计们

I'm thinking about making some freshly brewed iced tea

我想泡点清新冰茶

if anyone would like some.

有谁想喝呀

I wouldn't mind a glass.

我不介意来一杯

I wasn't talking to you.

我没跟你说话

Bring him to his bony knees.

整到他求爷爷告奶奶

Sheldon, come on back.

小谢子回来吧

Yes, yes.

来了来了

What did you decide?

您意下如何

I'll give your paper to Professor Hawking.

我可以把你的论文给霍金教授

Great, thank you!

太好了谢谢

Oh, that's terrific!

真是太好了

But in exchange, I'd like you to do a few things for me.

但是你要为我做几件事作为交换

What kinds of things?

什么事

Are you familiar with the 12 labors of Hercules?

你听说过赫拉克勒斯的十二伟业吗

希腊神话中赫拉因错杀自己孩子而受诅咒为消除罪业他要为敌人完成十二项任务

Of course.

当然

You should be so lucky.

那你走运了

All right.

好了

What would you like me to do first?

你要我先做什么

Well, I thought I'd start you off

我觉得我就先让你

by polishing my belt buckles.

给我擦皮带扣吧

By all means.

没问题

When I was a boy, I would polish my Mee-Maw's silver.

小时候我会帮我奶奶擦银器

And she would entertain me with stories

她就会给我讲

about growing up in Oklahoma.

她在俄州长大的故事

Interesting woman.

有趣的女人

She once killed a prairie dog with a gravy boat.

有一次她用肉汁盘子打死了一只土拨鼠

That's nice.

真厉害

That's a lot of belt buckles.

好多皮带扣啊

Funny thing is,I only have one belt.

有趣的是我只有一条皮带

Anyway, I'll let you get started.

好了我不妨碍你开工了

Oh, by the way,

顺便说一下

the little marks, uh,that look like water spots--

上面可能有些看似水渍的点

I tend to stand too close to the urinal, so...

我小便时习惯靠便盆太近所以

...what you're seeing there is splash back.

你看到的那些是溅回来的

You make sissy on your belt buckles?

你把尿尿在皮带扣上吗

Mee-Maw's forks never had that.

奶奶的叉子上绝对没有

Here is a black light to check them.

给你个紫外光灯照尿渍吧

And for your own peace of mind,

再给你提个醒

you might not want to shine that around the rest of the room.

最好不要用它来照我的房间哦

紫外光灯还可以识别能够发出自然荧光的精液和其他体液

Sheldon, these look great.

谢尔顿擦得好干净啊

They're like magnificent little crowns

它们就像华丽的小皇冠

to hang over my magnificent little jewels.

挂在我坚挺的小宝贝上

How'd you get them so shiny?

你怎么擦得这么亮

Oh, I-I buffed them with Turtle Wax.

我给它们上了一层防水蜡

The man down at Pep Boys says from now on,

汽车用品店里的伙计说

the urine should just bead up and roll right off.

以后溅上去的尿液会直接流下去

Way to go the extra mile.

干得漂亮

Your Mee-Maw would be proud.

你奶奶会骄傲的

My Mee-Maw must never know of this.

我奶奶绝对不可以知道这件事

Now will you give Professor Hawking my paper?

现在能把我的论文给霍金教授看了吧

Oh, my dear boy, no.

小乖乖当然不可以

Okay.

好了

Next,

接下来

this is a sexy French maid costume

这是我买给伯纳黛特的

I bought for Bernadette.

性感法国女佣装

I thought it might spice things up

我原以为这既能增加情趣

and get her to dust my room at the same time,

又能让她帮我打扫房间

but I was wrong and really wrong.

可我错了大错特错

And you want me to return it for you?

所以你想让我把它退回去吗

No, no, no, mon petit cherie.

不不不我的小可爱[法语]

What are you all staring at?

你们看什么看

You ever seen a man try to get a meeting

没见过为了见斯蒂芬·霍金

with Stephen Hawking before?

牺牲色相的男人吗

It's not Saturday night.

今天不是周六呀

Why are you doing your laundry?

你怎么跑来洗衣服了

This is not my laundry.

这不是我的衣服

Wow, are these Amy's?

这是艾米的吗

Kind of trashy -- good for her.

挺狂野的不错不错

Those are Howard's.

那是霍华德的

Why are you washing

你为什么要替霍华德

Howard's man panties?

洗他的男士小内内呢

Because if I don't,

因为要是我不洗的话

he won't give my paper to Stephen Hawking.

他就不把我的论文拿给斯蒂芬·霍金看

He's a famous physicist.

斯蒂芬·霍金是个著名的物理学家

I know, he's the wheelchair dude who invented time.

我知道那个坐着轮椅发明了时间的家伙

That's close enough.

差不多吧

I don't understand,

我不懂

why doesn't Howard just introduce you to the guy?

为什么霍华德不直接把你介绍给那人呢

Because he's punishing me for being a "condescending jerk".

他要惩罚我这个"傲慢的混蛋"

You don't think I'm condescending, do you?

你不会也觉得我傲慢吧

Well, kind of...

有点吧

Oh, I'm sorry,condescending means...

抱歉 "傲慢"的意思是...

I know what it means.

我懂好不好

And yes, you love correcting people

没错你超喜欢纠正别人

and putting them down.

让人自惭形秽

Au contraire.

正相反

When I correct people I am raising them up.

当我纠正别人时我是让他们更进一步

You should know, I do it for you more than anyone.

你应该最懂了你可是深得我恩惠

Come on, you do it to feel superior.

拜托你只是给自己带来优越感

I see that twinkle in your eye

每次有人犯语法错误

when someone says "who" instead of "whom"

或是把月亮当作行星时

or thinks the moon is a planet.

我都能看到你两眼放光

《堂·吉诃德》Don Quixote 音似驴子诃德Donkey Hotay

Or Don Quixote is a book about a donkey named Hotay.

或是有人以为《堂·吉诃德》是在写驴子诃德

See, there it is,

看见没

there's that twinkle.

你两眼又放光了

Well, I can't help it. That's an involuntary twinkle.

没办法我完全是下意识两眼放光

What do you want me to tell you, Sheldon?

那你想我怎么说谢尔顿

I want you to tell me

我想听你说

that Howard is being mean to me for no reason.

霍华德就是想无故欺负我

Fine, Howard is being mean to you for no reason.

好吧霍华德就是想无故欺负你

I knew it.

我就知道

What's the matter?

怎么了

Every time I spend the night,

我每次在你家过夜

your mom slaps me on the behind says, "Go get 'em."

你妈都会拍我屁股说"妹子上吧"

It's not her fault.

这不能怪她

She's getting hormone replacement therapy.

她正在接受激素替代疗法

Makes her crazy horny.

导致她相当饥渴

Check this out, I got Sheldon to wear the Frenchmaid's costume.

看我让谢尔顿穿那套法国女佣装哦

Oh, my God, that's terrible.

天啊这也太过分了吧

Hey, I gave you first crack at it.

拜托是你穿过一次说不要的

Why are you doing that?

你为什么要这么做

You're being mean to him.

你这是在欺负他

He's mean to me all the time.

是他整天欺负我

You've heard him tease me about not having a doctorate.

你也见过他取笑我没有博士学位

If you don't want to get teased about that,

如果你不想没博士学位被人取笑

get a doctorate.

那就去考一个呀

I have one; they're great.

我有一个感觉超棒呢

Oh, come on, the man torments me.

拜托这个家伙一直在折磨我

I'm just letting him have a little taste of his own medicine.

我只不过用其人之道还治其人之身而已

It's not the same thing.

这不一样

Sheldon doesn't know when he's being mean

谢尔顿意识不到自己的刻薄

because the part of his brain that should know

因为他控制这部分情感的大脑

is getting a wedgie from the rest of his brain.

被大脑其它部分给挤扁了

Fine, I'll just make him do a couple more things,

好吧我让他再多干几件事

then I'll stop.

就收手

No, you have to stop now.

不你现在就得收手

Bernadette, I want to remind you,

伯纳黛特提醒你一下

you promised to take me dress shopping tomorrow!

你答应过明天陪我去买裙子的哦

Oh, damn.

该死

I'm sorry, I can't make it,

对不起我明天有事去不了了

but Sheldon's going to go with you!

但是谢尔顿会陪你去的

And that's the last thing you do to him.

这是你让他做的最后一件事了

Sheldon!

谢尔顿

I need your help!

帮我一下

What is it now, Mrs. Wolowitz?

又怎么了沃罗威茨太太

It's this dress!

这裙子有问题

When I put my front in, my back pops out!

我把胸塞进去屁股就露出来了

When I put my back in,my front pops out!

我把屁股塞进去胸就又露出来了

It's like trying to keep two dogs in a bathtub!

简直是一山容不下二虎呀

What do you want me to do?

你想让我做什么

We're gonna have to work as a team!

我们应该携手合作

Get in here, grab a handful,and start stuffing!

进来大把抓着动手塞啊

I'm not sure how to do this.

我不太确定该怎么做呢

It's easy, just pretend you're putting away a sleeping bag.

很简单就像把用完的睡袋给塞回去

Sleeping bags don't usually sweat this much, but okay.

睡袋不会出这么多汗不过好吧

Now zip me up.

帮我拉上拉链

Oh, if we squeeze you any tighter,

再继续挤下去

you may turn into a diamond.

你就能变成钻石了

钻石的形成需要高压推挤

You're right, who am I kidding?

你说得对我骗谁呢

You should have seen me when I was young, Sheldon.

你真该见见我年轻的时候谢尔顿

The fellas used to line up

追我的小伙们

and bring me boxes of candy.

排着队给我送糖

Why did I eat it all?!

我干嘛嘴贱全吃光啊

Would you hold me?

可以抱我一下吗

Oh... no, you know, I'm not really the holding kind of...

我我不是那种会抱别人的...

Oh, guys, I just remembered.

哦差点忘了

I got your ome Hawking souvenirs.

我给你们带了几个霍金纪念品

What are these?

是什么

Gears and springs from his wheelchair.

他轮椅上的齿轮和弹簧

Pretty cool, huh?

酷吧

Wow, that's amazing.

太棒了

I made an adjustment on the motor drive

我给他的轮椅制动机做了调整

and when I was putting it back together

之后要装回去时

I could not for the life of me figure out where they went.

却想不起这几个零件是装哪的了

I did it.

我做到了

Had to go to three clothing stores,

跑了整整三个服装店

but we finally found a dress that could envelop your mother.

总算找到一件能"装"进你妈的衣服了

I should have sent you

我应该提醒你

to the custom car cover place in Altadena.

去阿尔塔迪纳的特制车罩店去买的

They have her pattern on file.

他们有我妈的资料

Humorous.

真幽默

Now will you please present my paper to Professor Hawking?

现在能把我的论文给霍金教授看了吧

I don't know.

我不知道

Oh, for heaven's sake.

老天啊

I did your laundry, I pee-pee-proofed your belt buckles,

衣服帮你洗了你的皮带扣还上了防尿层

I, I even sprained my wrist

我为了帮你妈抬高胸部

helping your mother lift her bosom.

我还把手腕扭伤了

All right, Sheldon,

好了谢尔顿

there's only one thing left I want you to do.

你再帮我做最后一个任务

Don't worry, it's an easy one.

别担心这个超简单

Okay.

好吧

Give me a compliment.

夸夸我

Fine.

好吧

You have very tiny hands.

你的手超小

No... about my job.

不是夸我的工作

I want you to tell me I'm good at what I do.

夸我工作干得出色

You're obviously good at what you do.

你明显干得很出色啊

Well, then why are you always ripping on me?

那你为什么老是挖苦我

Oh, I understand the confusion.

我理解你的困惑

I have never said that you are not good at what you do.

我从未说过你工作不称职

It's just that what you do is not worth doing.

我是说你的工作没价值

It's nicer than anything he's ever said to me.

这话可比他对我说的好听多了

I'd take it and run.

要我一定会接受

Thank you, Sheldon.

谢谢你谢尔顿

Now will you give my paper to Hawking?

现在能把我的论文给霍金看了吧

Sorry, I can't.

抱歉不能

What, why not?

什么为什么

I gave it to him three days ago.

我三天前就给他了

He was really impressed.

他说了那论文很棒

He wants to meet you.

他想见你

All right, then.

那好吧

Thank you, Howard.

谢谢你霍华德

Please let Professor Hawking know

请你转告霍金教授

that I'm available at his earliest convenience.

他什么时间想见我我都有空

I thought he might be a little more excited.

我还以为他会更兴奋呢

Give it a second.

稍安勿躁

Professor Hawking,

霍金教授

it's an honor and a privilege to meet you, sir.

能见到您真是太荣幸了先生

I know.

我知道

I want to thank you for taking time to see me.

感谢您抽出时间见我

My pleasure.

我的荣幸

I enjoyed reading your paper very much.

我很喜欢你的论文

You clearly have a brilliant mind.

你的确是聪明绝顶

I know.

我知道

Your thesis that the Higgs boson is a black hole

你那关于希格斯玻色子是个黑洞

accelerating backwards through time is fascinating.

且能加速时间反演的理论很厉害

Thank you.

谢谢

It just-- it came to me one morning in the shower.

是我有天早上洗澡时突然想到的

That's nice.

挺好啊

Too bad it's wrong.

可惜是错误的

What do you mean wrong?

你什么意思

You made an arithmetic mistake on page two.

第二页上有地方运算错误了

It was quite the boner.

愚蠢的错误

No, no... that can't be right.

不那不可能

I-I don't make arithmetic mistakes.

我不可能会运算错误啊

Are you saying I do?

那你是说我有吗

Oh, no,

不是

no, no, of course not.

当然不是

It's just, I was thinking...

我只是在想

Oh, gosh, golly,I made a boo-boo,

天哪我真的错了

and I gave it to Stephen Hawking.

我还把它呈给了史蒂芬·霍金

Great, another fainter.

老天又一个晕倒粉

生活大爆炸 第五季 The Big Bang Theory Season 5 第21集: 霍金现身 The Hawking Excitation

台词

生活大爆炸第五季 The Big Bang Theory Season 5 第21集: 霍金现身 The Hawking Excitation