生活大爆炸第九季双语台词对白剧本

Leonard...

莱纳德

I've got terrible news.

我有个天大的坏消息

What's going on?

怎么了

Before I tell you, perhaps I should soften the blow.

在我说之前或许需要给你点心里缓冲

You're face is pleasingly symmetrical.

你的脸对称得很讨喜

Just tell me.

你就说吧

A Swedish team of physicists

一个瑞典的物理学家团队

is trying to scoop our super-fluid vortex experiment.

想要抢先一步进行我们的超流体漩涡实验

Oh, well, that kind of stinks.

好吧这是有点恶心

"That kind of stinks"?

什么叫"有点恶心"

Why aren't you more upset?

你应该要更不爽啊

Did I soften the blow too much?

我刚才给你缓冲太多了吗

Because this here is more like a Picasso painting.

因为这副尊容更像是一幅毕加索的抽象画

What are we going to do?

那我们要怎么办

Perform the experiment immediately.

立刻进行实验

I'd love to, but we need liquid helium

我也想但我们需要液氦

and our shipment's on back order for a month.

而我们订的氦要晚一个月才到

A month? What? Are you kidding me?

什么一个月你跟我闹呢

That would have been a good time for you to soften the blow.

现在就很适合你给我做心里缓冲啊

That shirt brings out the blue in your eyes.

这T恤能衬托出你那深邃的蓝眸

Thank you. Aren't you sweet.

谢谢你嘴真甜

Let's go check to see if the university

我们去查查大学里

has any helium in reserve.

还有没有氦气存货吧

Did you know that I almost didn't wear this shirt today?

你知道我今天差点就不穿这件衣服吗

Hey, Barry, we're in trouble.

巴里我们碰到了麻烦

We need liquid helium--

我们需要液氦

does the department have any we can use?

系里有多余的可以让我们用吗

Sorry, there's a shortage.

抱歉这东西有些短缺

And what we do have I need for my quantum excitation study.

而仅有的存货我要拿来做量子激发研究

But you won't need much for that.

你那个实验不需要用多少啊

True, but if it's successful,

的确但如果成功了

I'm having a party with balloons.

我开派对要拿来灌气球啊

Come on, Barry, there's a Swedish team

别这样巴里有个瑞典团队

trying to run our experiment before us.

想抢先进行我们的实验

Can't you spare any?

你真不能匀一点给我们吗

Be honest-- if the shoe was on the other foot,

你们老实说如果今天换我碰到这情况

would you do this for me?

你们会愿意帮我吗

- Yes. - No chance.

-会 -不可能

What are you doing?

你帮倒忙呢

He said be honest, so I was honest.

他说老实说所以我老实说啊

Didn't your mother tell you? It's the best policy.

你母亲没教你吗诚实为上

So, what do you say?

所以你意下如何

Hell no.

下辈子吧

He could've softened the blow.

他可以给我们点缓冲再说的

翻译：爱搞笑钱德勒赛强迫症莫妮卡猫猫中之王别扭大菜

校对：爱搞笑钱德勒赛强迫症莫妮卡猫总监 YY猫

后期：灰灰是菇凉时间轴：风吹来的那片云

大

本蓝光版外挂字幕由风吹来的那片云用WEB版调轴

活

炸

爆

生

第九季第六集

Why do you need Kripke?

你们为啥需要找他要氦气

Can't you just go to Party City for helium?

你们不能直接去派对用品店买点吗

We'd have to go to every Party City in California.

我们得跑遍它们全加州的店才够

Sounds like you on Cinco de Mayo.

听起来就像5月5日节时的你啊

墨西哥节日庆祝某场战役的胜利在节日当日会有各种派对舞蹈等等

Hey, people were still talking about that party

我办的那个派对到5月7日

on siete de Mayo.

还有人赞不绝口呢

Leonard, if that Swedish team beats us,

莱纳德如果那个瑞典团队赢了我们

I will never be able to enjoy anything from their country again.

我此生都再也不愿享用那个国家的东西了

Which is a shame, because Swedish meatballs

那真挺可惜的因为瑞典的肉丸

are my favorite toothpick-delivered meatball.

是我最爱的用牙签插着吃的肉丸

If you need liquid helium so bad, I know a guy

如果你们真迫切需要液氦我认识个人

who can get you some, if you don't ask too many questions.

他能帮你们搞到前提是不许问太多问题

- Who is he? - Where does he work?

-他是何方神圣 -他在哪儿工作

How does he get the helium?

他怎么能搞到氦

How many questions are too many questions?

问多少问题才算是太多问题

Maybe he's not for you.

或许他不适合你们

Four questions. There answer's four.

四题答案是四题

Hey, you know who went out on a date the other night?

你知道之前谁晚上去约会了吗

Stuart.

斯图尔特

Oh, good for him.

那恭喜他啊

I thought so, too.

我也这么觉得

So is she, like, homeless, or framing him for a crime?

所以这妞是无家可归还是要栽赃陷害他

He's using some kind of dating app on his phone.

他在手机上装了一个约会软件

Oh, which one?

叫什么

Maybe we can get Amy to try it.

或许我们能让艾米也试试

I don't know.

不知道

Stuart, can you come in here?

斯图尔特你能过来一下吗

He tried to explain it to me.

他试着跟我解释过

It shows you pictures of people nearby,

上面会显示出附近的用户

you swipe them around, it looks kind of like a game.

你能左右滑动换人看看起来像个游戏

Oh, and if you lose the game, you have to go out with Stuart.

如果你游戏输了你就得跟斯图尔特约会

What's up?

找我干嘛

Can you show us that dating app?

你能给我们看看那个约会软件吗

Oh, yeah, sure.

可以啊行

This thing has changed my life.

这软件真是改变了我的人生

Wow. So how many girls have you met?

所以你约到了几个姑娘

Two.

2个

I probably don't need to mention

我想我不用多说

there's an entire number between that and zero.

2跟0之间相隔了"1"个世界吧

Well, so how does it work?

这软件怎么用

Uh, well, it-it shows me all

上面会显示出

the single women in a five-mile radius

方圆八公里内所有使用这软件的

who are using the app.

单身女子

If I like the way they look, I hit "Thumbs up."

如果我喜欢她们的长相那就点"赞"

If I don't, "Thumbs down."

如果不喜欢就点"烂"

Oh, what would make you give a girl a thumbs down?

那怎么样的情况会让你给姑娘点"烂"呢

First time it happens I will let you know.

首次发生时我会告诉你

Oh, hey. I just heard back from the liquid helium guy.

我收到那个氦气男的回信了

What's he say?

他怎么说

He's got what we need and can meet us tonight.

他有我们要的东西可以今晚交易

Oh, really?

是吗

You know I don't like buying things at night.

你知道我不喜欢晚上买东西

January 7, 2009.

2009年1月7日

I went to the Ralph's at 11:30pm to pick up

我晚上11点半去买

Cracklin' Oat Bran for the morning and what did I see?

隔天早餐要吃的燕麦片然后我看到了啥

The man restocking the cereal shelves.

在给早餐谷物架补货的店员

That's right. And what did he do?

没错他干嘛了

He handed you the box directly and called you Stretch.

他直接把早餐片递给了你然后叫你瘦竹竿

It's like it was yesterday.

伤心往事历历在目啊

Do you want liquid helium or not?

那你到底还想不想要液氦了

Of course I do.

我当然想要啊

I don't want that Swedish team scooping us.

我不想被那个瑞典团队捷足先登

Then I'm going to tell him we're in.

那我告诉他我们同意

Leonard, wait. This is highly unethical.

莱纳德等等这非常不道德

We're just bending the rules a little.

我们只是稍微变通一下

We have grant money to do the experiment,

我们有进行实验的拨款

so we're going to spend it on the helium we need.

所以我们拿这款项去买实验需要的氦

It's not like when Dr. Goldfarb

这又不像戈德法布博士

claimed he bought an electron microscope

对外声称自己买了一个电子显微镜

and he was really just keeping

而真相是他在

a Russian girl in an apartment in Van Nuys.

在加州范奈司的金屋藏"金丝猫"

Was she helping him with his research?

那女孩帮他做研究吗

Sure.

"当然"

So, are we doing this?

我们到底要不要买

Okay, but where does he get the helium?

好吧可他的氦是从哪里弄来的

Remember? Don't ask too many questions?

还记得吗不许多问

Uh, but this is violating university code.

但这有违我们大学的校规

A little, but...

稍微有点但...

if I may quote Einstein,

爱因斯坦曾说过

"The pursuit of science calls us

"追求科学需要我们

to ignore the rules set by man."

抛开一切规章制度"

All right, do it.

好吧买吧

Tell him we're in.

告诉他我们同意见面

Done.

好了

I can't find that quote on the Internet.

我在网上查不到爱因斯坦那句话

Did you make that up?

是不是你瞎编的

Before I answer,

在回答之前

may I just say your skin has never looked better.

我得先说你的皮肤也太好了吧

Aren't you just made of sugar.

你的嘴呀跟抹了蜜一样

I'm not sure how I feel about this.

我不确定对此该作何感想

Oh, come on, just let him put the app on your phone.

放心就让他把软件装你手机上吧

Yeah, Stuart got two dates with it.

对啊斯尔图特约到了两个妞呢

One of which would've ended in sex had she not said no.

其中一个要没拒绝我早发展到床上了

Okay, all set.

好了装好了

Okay, let me see.

让我看看

Nope, nope,

不行不行

nope...

不行

Oh, he's cute!

这个帅气

Doesn't a teardrop tattoo

泪滴图案的纹身

mean he murdered someone?

不是代表他曾杀过人吗

And he's sad about it.

他对此感到痛心啊

Hey, I thought you were gonna be out late?

我以为你很晚才会回来呢

If you wanted me to stay out later,

如果你想让我晚点回家

you should've given me more spending money.

就应该给我多点零花钱啊

What are you guys up to?

你们在干什么

We put Amy on a dating app,

我们帮艾米注册了约会软件

and we're seeing what's out there.

现在在看上面都有什么人

Oh, fun! Let me see.

有意思让我看看

Uh, no...

不行

no, uh, definitely not.

不行绝对不行

What was wrong with that guy?

这人哪里不好了

Uh, he's Indian.

他是印度人

We've already got one of those.

我们已经有一个阿三哥了

Ooh, we should find a nice Latino.

我们应该找一个拉丁帅哥

It really round us out.

让我们这个小团体更完美

Hey, I want to try.

我想试试

Uh, excuse me, c-can I have my phone back?

不好意思能把手机还给我吗

Hang on, I'm trying to find you the next great love of your life.

等等我在帮你寻找下一位挚爱呢

The man who will father your children.

你未来孩子的父亲

Okay, yes or no on white guy with dreadlocks?

好了脏辫雷鬼头的白人怎么样

看起来乱七八糟几百年没洗的辫子头

That must be him.

那一定是他

Oh, of course.

肯定啦

An nondescript, white panel van.

一辆没有标识的全白面包车

You may be familiar with it from the sentence:

以下这句话你可能会听着耳熟

"Their bodies were found

"他们的尸体

in a nondescript, white panel van."

是在一辆没有标识的全白面包车内找到"

What's up?

你们好

Uh, I'm Leonard.

我是莱纳德

- This is my friend-- - I'm Skippy.

-这位是我的朋友 -叫我兽主甘

Skippy Cavanaugh.

兽主甘·卡瓦诺

Great.

好

You got the cash?

钱带来了吗

Uh, yeah, uh, right here.

带来了在这里呢

Wait, hold on, hold on.

等等且慢且慢

How do we know that you're not gonna

我们怎么知道

take the money and drive away?

你不会拿了钱就跑

What ya doing, Skippy?

你这是干嘛兽主甘

Exactly what 1970s television crime dramas have taught us.

这是跟70年代的罪案连续剧学的

You give us the helium first.

你先把氦给我们

Oh, how do I know you're not gonna

我怎么知道你们会不会收了货

drive away without paying me?

不给钱就跑啊

Guess I'm not the only one

看来我不是唯一一个

who watches '70s television crime dramas.

会看70年代罪案连续剧的人

Look, you can trust us.

听着你可以信任我们

We're respected scientists.

我们是受人尊敬的科学家

Well, he is.

他是

I'm a wedding planner,

我是一名婚礼策划师

who can't find love himself.

然而自己却找不到真爱

It's ironic, but the point is

虽然很讽刺但重点是

we can't trust you.

我们无法信任你

You're a sketchy character in a parking garage.

你只是个在停车场的鬼祟男

Yeah, well, from my perspective,

没错在我看来

that's how you two appear to me.

你们俩也是鬼祟男

Well, I never thought of it like that.

我从未这样想过

Boy, frame of reference will just sneak up on you, won't it?

天啊参照系让人措手不及

My friend does make a decent point about the money.

我朋友对钱的担心不无道理

I don't feel comfortable just handing it over up front.

我也觉得先给钱不妥

Ah-ah-ah, no money, no helium.

不给钱不给氦

Seems we're at a, uh, stalemate.

看来我们陷入了"逼和"的局面

Not technically.

严格来说不算

In chess, a stalemate refers to a situation

在国际象棋中 "逼和"指的局面是

in which there are no remaining moves.

无棋可动无路可走

Uh, you have plenty of moves available.

你还有很多条路可以选

You could beat us up and steal the money.

你可以揍扁我们然后把钱拿走

You could kill us, you know.

你也可以杀了我们

Really, you're only limited by your imagination.

你只是被自己的想象力限制了

All these years, I've been using "stalemate,"

这么多年来虽然我嘴上说"逼和"

when I really mean "impasse."

但我真正要表达的是"僵局"

I feel foolish.

我感觉自己好傻

I don't think it matters if this is a stalemate

这都不重要不管这是"逼和"

or an impasse or a Mexican standoff.

"僵局"或是"墨西哥对峙"

意为对峙多方为了个人利益而不愿放下武器率先让步的局面

What are we gonna do here?

我们现在应该怎么办

Oh, whoa, whoa, how can it be a Mexican standoff?

等等这怎么能算"墨西哥对峙"呢

Everybody knows you need three sides for that.

谁都知道这种情况得有三方对峙

Not necessarily.

不一定

Uh, many argue the essence of a Mexican standoff

很多人争论"墨西哥对峙"的本质在于

is that no one can walk away from the conflict

就是没人能够全身而退

without incurring harm.

却毫发无伤

Hmm, I don't follow.

我没听明白

Let me give you an example.

我给你举个例子吧

Earlier today,

今天早些时候

I decoded the headers on your e-mail,

我破解了你电邮的标头隐藏资讯

and I know that your name is Kenneth Fitzgerald.

我知道你的名字叫肯尼斯·菲兹杰拉德

From that, I figured out where you live and where you work.

然后我找出了你的住址和工作地点

Now, to make this a Mexican standoff,

现在要把情况变成"墨西哥对峙"

I would say something like, uh,

我会说些类似这样的话

"You give us the helium or I'll turn you in to the authorities."

"给我氦气不然我就去当局告发你"

Is that a threat?

你这是在威胁我吗

Yeah, exactly. See, you're getting it.

没错看你开始懂了嘛

Yeah, well, I know where you work, all right?

好呀我也知道你们在哪里工作

And if you mess with me, I'll report you,

如果你们想整我我就举报你

then I'll pound your asses into the ground.

然后我会把你俩揍得亲娘都认不出

Perfect! Now we really are in a Mexican standoff.

太棒了现在这才叫"墨西哥对峙"

Is this one of those times

是不是又到了那种

where I've won the battle but lost the war?

我赢了战役却输了战争的局面

Afraid so, Skippy.

恐怕是哦兽主甘

I told you we shouldn't go shopping at night.

我就说咱们不该晚上出来买东西

All right, let's all just calm down.

好了大家都冷静一下

Nobody wants to report anybody.

谁都不想举报谁

No, I don't like this. I'm out.

我不喜欢跟你们做买卖我要走了

No, no, no. Wait, don't go.

别别等一下不要走

Just let me explain.

请听我解释

We're physicists, and we're trying to prove a hypothesis

我们是物理学家我们只是想证明

that we've been working on for over a year.

一个我们研究了一年的假设而已

Really? What's the hypothesis?

真的吗什么假设

Space-time can be interpreted as

时空可以用

the surface of an n-dimensional superfluid.

一个N维超流体的表面来解释

Could be, could be.

有可能哦有可能

Go on.

说下去

Okay, but now there's this Swedish team that read our paper

现在有一个瑞典团队读了我们的论文

and they're trying to beat us to our own discovery.

想抢先我们一步获得实验成果

We really need this helium.

所以我们真的很需要这罐氦气

And I'm sorry I lied about

抱歉我之前撒谎

being a wedding planner who can't find love.

说我自己是没人爱的婚礼策划师

Although I am currently single, if you know anybody.

不过我现在的确是单身你有人可以介绍给我吗

Here's the money. Can we do this?

钱给你买卖能继续吗

Okay.

好吧

It's a shame about those scientists ripping you off.

那些占你们便宜的科学家实在太不要脸了

I expected a higher ethical standard

我还以为瑞典的朋友们

from our friends in Sweden.

道德标准会更高呢

It's actually pretty common in our field.

这事在我们学术界其实挺常见的

Not much you can do about it.

我们也拿他们没办法

Well, for the right amount of money,

如果你们出的价够高

if you know where they live,

又知道他们的住址

there's, uh, plenty we could do about it.

我倒是知道好多种对付他们的"办法"

Did you hear that, Leonard?

听到了吗莱纳德

There's plenty we could do about it.

我们有好多种对付他们的办法呢

Do you have a card?

你有名片吗

Okay, here we go.

好了出来啦

Now everyone can see.

现在大家都能看到了

All right.

好的

Where do we stand on cross-eyed Mike?

大家觉得斗鸡眼麦克如何啊

You know he won't be looking at other girls.

好歹他不能乱瞟看别的姑娘了

Unless they're sitting on the end of his nose.

除非她们坐在他鼻头上

Okay, okay, okay. Thumbs down.

好好好按"烂"

Next.

下一个

Ew, check out his tiny teeth.

看看他那一嘴小牙齿

He looks like a man-dolphin.

他好像一只人形海豚

Wait, if he's good in bed, she can throw him a fish.

如果他床技超群你可以丢一条小鱼作奖励

I love you, Amy.

我爱你艾米

Okay, I'm starting to feel guilty.

我开始有罪恶感了

Aren't we being a little mean?

我们是不是太毒舌了啊

That's a fair point.

你说得对

We wouldn't make fun of someone like this to their face.

我们肯定不会当着本人的面这么取笑他

Look, it's Stuart!

看是斯图尔特

You may want to leave the room.

你最好回避一下吧

Right this way, Uncle Harvey.

这边请哈维叔叔

Will you stop with that already?

你能不能别装了

I'm trying not to attract attention.

我这是在避免引人注意

And tipping his hat to the cleaning lady didn't do that?

你让他向清洁女工脱帽致意还不够引人注意吗

She said, "Buenas noches." What was he supposed to do?

她说了"晚安"[西语] 我叔叔还能怎么做

Let's just start the experiment.

我们还是赶紧开始实验吧

Leonard, we should probably have our story straight

莱纳德我们应该把故事编圆了

in case we get caught.

以防到时被抓住

We're not getting caught.

我们不会被抓的

Well, you can't be sure of that.

你又不能保证这一点

What if the helium dealer rats us out?

万一卖氦气的人出卖我们呢

What if Kripke asks where we got it?

万一克里普奇问起这氦气的来历呢

What if the university checks my family tree

万一学校查了我的家谱

and finds out I don't have an Uncle Harvey?

发现我根本就没有一个哈维叔叔怎么办

The dealer doesn't care, Kripke has no authority over us,

卖家没这么无聊克里普奇又管不着我们

and you being related to a metal container

而你和金属罐子有亲属关系

would explain a lot.

反而更能解释你的种种

Help me hook this up.

帮我把它接起来

What?

怎么了

- Well, did you see this sticker? - What is it?

-你看到这个贴纸了吗 -怎么了

It's partially torn off, but the segment that remains reads:

虽然掉了一大半不过剩下部分还依稀可见

"Property of" and the letter "U."

专属财产和一个U字

It's probably USC or UCLA.

可能是南加大或加州大学洛杉矶分校吧

Yeah, but what if it's "Property of U.S. Government"?

但万一指的是美国[U.S.]政府专属财产怎么办

There's a national helium reserve in Amarillo, Texas.

德州的阿马里洛就有一个国家氦气保护区

If this was stolen from there,

如果这个是从那里偷的

we're accessories to a federal crime.

我们就犯下了联邦重罪

Let's not jump to conclusions.

别这么快就下结论

A lot of things start with "U."

U可以指好多东西呢

That's true.

你说得对

There's the U.S. Air Force,

可以指美国空军

U.S. Department of Defense, U.S. Navy,

美国国防部美国海军

"You" And I are going to jail.

还可以指你和我一起吃牢饭

Listen, we can do the experiment as planned

听着我们可以按计划做完实验

and beat the Swedish team to the punch,

让瑞典人哭着回家找妈妈

or we can kiss our dreams good-bye

或者我们可以和科研梦吻别

because we were to afraid to break a few rules.

因为我们不敢违反一点小规则

Ma'am.

女士您好

Okay, does everyone remember the rules?

好了大家都记住规则了吗

If he's shirtless, one sip.

如果他没穿衣服喝一口

Posing with a pet, two sips.

带着宠物摆姿势喝两口

Pet and shirtless, chug like it's your job.

带宠物又没穿衣服猛灌

And pull!

开始

I have that same underwear!

这条内裤我也有

Chug!

灌

Mm, Amy, you're getting a text.

艾米你收到条短信

Oh, um, give me that.

给我

"I had a great time last night."

"昨晚玩得很愉快"

戴夫昨晚过得很愉快

No, no, st-stop reading that.

停停停都别看了

- Who's Dave? - I...

-谁是戴夫 -我...

You went on a date last night?

你昨晚上去约会了

Are you seeing someone?

你在跟谁交往吗

No, it-it's not like that.

没有不是那样的

"And I'd love to take you out again"?

"我很乐意再约你出来玩"

- Amy! - What?

-艾米 -什么

- Can't believe it. - Oh, my God.

-难以置信啊 -我的神啊

Okay, it's like that.

好吧就是那样

Thank you for coming back.

感谢你能回来

Yeah, well, normally I wouldn't,

没事通常情况下我不会的

but my daughter's having a sleepover, and there's only

可我女儿跟她的朋友们今晚在我家住

so much screaming and Katy Perry a man can take.

尖叫加水果姐姐已经超越我的承受极限了

美国知名女歌手歌曲大多唱女性自强自尊颇受小女孩到青少年女性喜欢

Anyway, if you could just give us our money back,

总之把钱还给我们

you can have your helium and we'll be on our way.

你拿走你的氦气我们马上走

Yeah, well, is there something wrong with it?

好它有什么问题吗

No, nothing. We just changed our mind.

没有我们只是改变主意了

He has glasses and I'm a know-it-all;

他是四眼田鸡我是自以为是的瘦竹竿

we are not built for prison.

我俩不适合蹲监狱

Yeah, I hear you.

也是有道理

Well, you're good guys, so I'll, uh...

你们俩是好人所以我...

I'll take the helium off your hands.

我会把氦气拿走

Thank you.

谢谢你

But you ain't getting your money back.

但是钱不能还给你们

You're taking advantage of us?

你是想占我俩便宜吗

We clarified nomenclature together.

我们不是一起弄清过语义吗

Look, I enjoy semantic digressions as much as the next guy,

虽然我跟普通人一样都爱听语义教学

but, uh, this is business.

可是在商言商嘛

You know what?

算了

It's fine. Keep the money.

就这样吧钱你留着

We just want to be done with this.

我们只想赶紧脱手

No problem, but I am gonna have to charge you

没问题但我得跟你们收点

a small helium restocking fee.

氦气退货费

I don't understand.

我不懂了

He wants more money.

他想再要钱

Well, it better not be more than a thousand dollars;

那最好别超过一千美金

that's all I've got on me.

我身上就这么多了

That's exactly how much it is.

正好就是那数

Finally,

终于

something breaks our way.

有个顺利的事了

I can't believe you're seeing someone

不敢相信你居然在跟人约会

and we don't even know about it.

而我们什么都不知道

Yeah, why wouldn't you tell us?

对你为什么不告诉我们呢

Because it's new and weird

因为这事才开始又很奇怪

and I'm just trying to figure it all out.

我自己还在摸索阶段

And I knew if I told you guys

而且我知道如果告诉了你们

I had been out with a few people

我已经跟几个人约过会了

that you'd get way too excited about it.

你们肯定会表现得太过兴奋

A few people?

还几个人

- What?! - Amy!

-什么 -艾米

So, are we allowed to ask how it's going?

所以我们能问问进展如何吗

It's going fine.

还行

It's mostly just been meeting people for coffee.

基本就是跟人见面喝个咖啡

Wha...?!

什么

I thought we were all...

我以为我们每次都要...

Never mind.

当我没说

I-I thought you weren't ready to start seeing people.

我以为你还没准备好跟别人约会呢

Well, I don't have much experience dating,

我没什么约会经验

so I decided it would be good for me

所以觉得多出去见见世面

to, you know, get out there a little.

对我来说是好事

Well, good for you.

挺好的

Thank you.

谢谢你

And how many guys have you gone out with?

你已经约过几个人了

Please be less than two.

拜托不要超过2个

- Three. - Damn it.

-3个 -靠

Well, the Swedes might beat us,

虽然我们可能会被瑞典人打败

but at least we won't get gang-noogied in prison.

可起码不用在监狱里被人"头皮转转功"

1990年的家庭搞笑犯罪电影

Is Ernest Goes to Jail the only prison movie you've seen?

监狱电影你是只看过《监狱宝贝蛋》吗

It scared me straight, Leonard.

那电影把宝宝我吓乖了莱纳德

Hey, I've been thinking.

我想了想

I was being petty.

是我太小气了

You can have my helium.

你们可以用我的氦气

Thank you, Barry.

谢谢你巴里

But you have to add my name to your paper.

但你们的论文得加上我的名字

That's preposterous.

太荒谬了

I don't know, seems fair.

我觉得挺公平的

You can't do it without me.

没我你们也做不成实验

Can you give us a minute?

给我们一分钟

Take your time.

慢慢商量

I'll walk out backwards for dramatic effect.

为了做效果我会慢慢倒退出去

I don't like being extorted like this.

我不喜欢这样被敲诈

Especially by him of all people.

尤其还是被他

Me neither, but what other choice do we have?

我也不喜欢可我们别无选择

I promise this is the last time.

我保证这是最后一次

It's says right here on the Wikipedia

维基百科上写着呢

"A Mexican standoff is a confrontation between

"墨西哥对峙是由至少三方

at least three parties."

相对而立的结果"

How can you trust Wikipedia

你怎么敢信维基百科

if they use "between" to refer to three parties?

他们居然用"相对而立"形容三方

They should've used "among," right?

它们应该用三足鼎立对不对

Or "amongst," if they were feeling whimsically archaic.

或者鼎分三足如果他们想带点古风古韵

All right, enough with the chitchat.

好了别聊这些闲话了

Are we gonna watch Ernest Goes to Jail or not?

我们到底还看不看《监狱宝贝蛋》了

Absolutely.

当然了

But don't be surprised if this movie sets you

但如果这部片子把你吓到从此老实做人

on the straight and narrow.

你可别太吃惊

I am open to change.

我这人乐于改变

生活大爆炸 第九季 The Big Bang Theory Season 9 第6集: 液氮短缺 The Helium Insufficiency

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生活大爆炸第九季 The Big Bang Theory Season 9 第6集: 液氮短缺 The Helium Insufficiency