Ladies and gentlemen,
to announce this year's Oscar nominees...
Hello! Here I am, Mr. Peanutbutter.
大家好 我来了 花生酱先生
That's my name and I am here.
Okay, the nominees. Nominees for Oscar.
好了 提名者 奥斯卡提名者
Who are the nominees?
Well, as I used to say on Hollywoo Stars and Celebrities:
What Do They Know? Do They Know Things?
Let's Find Out,
let's find out.
For Best Actor, the nominees are:
Jurj Clooners for The Nazi Who Played Yahtzee.
Bread Poot for City of AIDS.
Colin Firth for First Things Firth:
The Colin Firth Story.
Michael Fassbender for... I want to say Bill Gates?
And BoJack Horseman for Secretariat.
BoJack, you just got nominated for an Oscar.
You're an Oscar nominee. How do you feel?
翻译: 小海绵 Sü匠看BJ作死 青椒 小早属马 圈圈
Why do I keep thinking things will make me happy?
What is wrong with me?
BoJack, don't do this.
Don't fetishize your own sadness.
Oh, God, I'm drowning.
- I feel like I'm drowning. - BoJack, listen.
-我感觉我要淹死了 -波杰克 听着
When I was 17, I snuck out to a fraternity party.
The roads were icy and I swerved into the lake.
I came to underwater.
It was dark and cold, and I didn't even know which way was up.
I thought for sure I was going to drown.
And then... I noticed...
when I opened my mouth, the air bubbles floated up,
and that's how I knew which way to swim.
That is a terrifying story.
BoJack, when you find yourself lost
and disoriented and underwater
and you don't know which way is up,
it's important to breathe.
I don't deserve this. I'm not a best actor.
Awards aren't about who's best, BoJack.
That's literally the only thing they're about.
No. All this means is that you're one of the special people.
I saw it the first time I met you.
You must have known it all your life.
And all your life, people told you that you were wrong,
that you weren't special, that you were just like everybody else.
But now, the special people are saying,
"You were right, BoJack. You were right."
"你是对的 波杰克 你是对的"
I was right. I am one of the special people.
- Yes. - What are we doing just sitting here?
I just got nominated for an Oscar.
We gotta party like it's 1982,
the year Prince released 1999.
BoJack, your complimentary Rolex is here.
BoJack, giant chocolate Oscar's here.
Famous DJ David Gu-etta is at the door.
Free Tesla's here, Boj.
They want to know if they can park it in your driveway.
No. Tell them I want my free Tesla
parked in my goddamn living room. I'm BoJack!
Yeah, now we're doing it! Look at us partying.
太爽了 我们在狂欢 看看咱们
BoJack, you got another delivery. Someone sent a... nerd?
波杰克 又有人送东西了 这次是 书呆子
You get a load of this chili cheese fountain?
Grab a handful of beans and go to town.
Hey, this is all really something.
But I actually just came because I heard about the nomination
and I wanted to make sure you're okay.
That's a funny way of saying congratulations.
But not funny "Ha-ha", more like funny Doonesbury.
I know how this kind of thing can sometimes send you spinning.
"Oh, God, why doesn't this make me happy?
Will anything make me happy?
I'm an empty husk." That kind of thing.
Well, thank you for that, but I'm actually doing great.
I direct your attention
to the aforementioned chili cheese fountain!
It's too bad I'm not managing your social campaign anymore,
because this party would make a great Snapchat story.
You are not gonna make me guilty about leaving Princess Carolyn.
I'm not here to make you feel guilty. Like I said--
Honestly, I don't even know what you're doing over there.
Tweeting for celebrities?
Well, actually, I don't--
When I met you, you were so cool and interesting--
You used to actually care about shit. What happened?
I don't know, BoJack. Maybe caring about shit got old.
我不知道 波杰克 也许理想和情怀落伍了
Maybe I'm tired of everyone yelling at me
and sending death threats to my house,
and all my friends thinking I'm annoying,
and getting in fights with my husband,
and seeing little refugee boys die in hospital bombings.
It's exhausting and I can't do it. If that makes me a bad person,
我精疲力尽 我放弃了 如果我因此变成坏人
then I'm sorry that I'm not the "Cool, interesting girl."
I never said you were a bad person. I just said it's not you.
And you know it's not you.
Oh, and this party is you? Who are all these people?
- These are my friends. - Name one of them.
- Tes-ley. - You're just looking at the Tesla.
I don't know why it's so hard for you to believe
that I could be happy.
I'm not like you, okay?
I don't fetishize my own sadness.
- I don't fetishize my own sadness. - Sure.
You don't know anything about me.
I know that you can tweet for a living
in a house in Beverly Hills that your husband bought,
or you can think you're better than everyone,
but you can't do both.
I don't think I'm better than everyone.
And again, I say, sure.
You know what's gonna happen?
You're gonna win that Oscar, and you're gonna go up on that stage
and give your little speech, and then you're gonna go home.
And you're gonna be so miserable, you'll want to kill yourself.
And you're gonna have nobody left to stop you.
No one's gonna be there when I kill myself?
Listen to that chanting, Diane.
The chanting don't lie.
There's going to be plenty of people around when I kill myself.
Tell your readers that BoJack was sleeping.
He didn't even know they were announced today.
Okay. Goodbye, Heather.
好了 再见 希瑟
- Hey, Ana, can I ask you something? - Of course, darling.
-安娜 我能问你个问题吗 -当然 亲爱的
- So, if I win the Oscar-- - "When" You win the Oscar.
Right. But after that, what's gonna happen to us?
好吧 但获奖之后呢 我们怎么办
- What do you mean? - What we have.
It's more than just an Oscar campaign, right?
- I need to go. - What?
There's work to be done.
We got the nomination, but now, the real battle begins.
Enjoy your party. Stop worrying about the future.
Come on, buddy! Come on!
醒醒 兄弟 醒醒
- Mr. Peanutbutter! - Thank God you're okay.
Better than okay. I'm wonderful.
Thanks to you, you wonderful man.
When you said my name this morning, you changed my life.
- About that-- - Hey, did you see Erica here?
She was looking for you earlier, with her good eye.
Her other eye was looking to the stars.
BoJack, I need to talk to you.
Yeah? What's going on, buddy?
好啊 说什么 兄弟
Well, I've got good news and I've got bad news.
Raven on a wire. A gloomy portent, precariously perched.
电线上的乌鸦 似不祥之兆 不安地栖息在上
And, as the sun sets, so does it spread its deathly shadow
across the just and unjust of the outdoor seating area
of the California Pizza Kitchen.
And what better way to view such disquieting omens
than through these gorgeous floor-to-ceiling windows?
Yeah. Wow! They really make regular windows look like shit.
没错 哇 这么一比普通窗户简直掉价
I can't look out the window while lying on the floor?
No, thank you, regular window!
不是哟 谢谢 普通窗户
Tell me a little about your company.
Well, it started as a safe space for women.
Then, it became a safe space for women and men.
Now, it's more of a safe-ish space for women...
and a really safe space for men to look at women...
while also being driven around by them.
- Wow, something for everyone. - Demand is skyrocketing.
-好棒 可以各取所需 -市场需求暴增啊
That's why we need a bigger office space.
You come to work, clock in,
you put sugar in your coffee,
and watch it slowly disappear into nothingness.
But the sugar doesn't know why. Sugar didn't ask to be born.
He recently found out that his brother's sick.
I'm so sorry, but you know what else is sick?
These hardwood floors.
Did you hear that, Mr. Peanutbutter?
Losing BoJack was a blow. There's no way to sugarcoat it,
even if I were generally good at sugarcoating things,
You know, I wish cats really did have nine lives.
It would make me feel better about
how much I'm screwing up this one.
You're not screwing up your life.
Sometimes I feel like, if I could start everything over,
knowing what I know now, I'd do it all right this time.
But other times I think...
As you all know, things have been rough,
and, unfortunately, we have to scale back our staff.
- Mainly, you. - Are you firing me?
In a sense, yes.
But, in another sense, I'm promoting you
to a position of finding a job somewhere else.
Yeah. I don't think I ever thanked you
for giving me this job in the first place.
It was an honor to work with you.
You were the worst social media coordinator
this company ever had.
Are you sure you need surgery? Can't you get a second opinion?
You know there's only one doctor on the Peninsula.
I could ask him twice if it'd make you feel better.
Nothing could make me feel better right now.
Not even an amazing career opportunity.
Hold on, I'm getting another call.
I've got to take this.
It could be an amazing career opportunity. Hello?
Mr. Peanutbutter, this is Shep Von Trapp,
awards show producer,
with a career opportunity
This isn't a great time, Shep. Could you call back?
我现在不太方便 谢普 你可以稍后打来吗
The Oscar nomination announcement is in seven days
and we don't have a host.
Sadly, Jimmy Fallon just broke his face.
What? Halloween in January? What a crazy concept!
什么 一月的万圣节 多么疯狂的点子
I can't believe it!
I mean, what is this? Barry Gibb would be like...
我是说 这是什么鬼 巴里·吉布会唱
No. First, I gotta get a selfie with this thing.
等等 首先 我要跟这家店来张自拍
I'm Jimmy Fallon--
Und you are our first choice
after our first "First choice" got hit by a bus.
You're our second "First choice." What do you say?
Ooh, a job like that?
You want a fully present presenter to present.
And I don't know if I've got the pep in my step
to take that show where it needs to go, you know?
I've got a real pepless step, Shep.
Okay, well, let me know, because if you don't want to do it,
好吧 想通了告诉我 因为如果你拒绝
we'll probably just post
the list of nominees online or something.
It's really not that big of a deal.
Hey, sorry about that. Just got a call from the Oscars.
- They want me to host-- - They want you to host the Oscars?
But I don't think I have it in me right now.
Are you kidding? You gotta take that gig.
- Really? - Mr. Peanutbutter...
What did Nana Peanutbutter always say?
"Always take every opportunity that comes your way
because opportunities are like sneezes from God,
and when God sneezes, you can't say 'God bless you' to God,
so instead you have to take the opportunity.
I'm cold. Will you pass me that blanket?"
Boy, that old gal had something for everything, didn't she?
I know you're worried about me,
but sitting around the house worrying isn't going to help anyone.
Okay, but you'll call me when you get out of the surgery, right?
好 那你手术结束后立刻打给我 好吗
I'm not gonna let my phone leave my sight.
Of course. And now, I've got something new to live for.
My little brother, telling the whole world who got an Oscar!
We are minutes away. Shep, release the envelope.
还有几分钟了 谢普 出信封吧
Copy that. Releasing the envelope.
Are you ready, Brother Pricewater?
Of course, Brother Housecoopers.
Mr. Peanutbutter, we'd like to invite you to the stage.
It's here! The golden envelope.
Okay. Oh, my phone. What should I do with it, Todd?
好吧 我的手机 我的手机该怎么办 陶德
- Maybe you should hold it. - Uh-huh.
- No, I'll take it with me. - All right.
-不行 我带走吧 -好
- No, you hold it. - Sure thing, yeah.
-不行 你拿着 -没问题
- No, put it in my jacket pocket. - Right here. Okay.
-不行 放我口袋里 -好嘞 放这儿
Oh, no, it's a fake pocket. Tricked again!
该死 是个假口袋 又被骗了
Todd, it's ringing. This is it.
陶德 电话响了 要出结果了
Oh, no, my phone!
Oh, no, I kicked it, right through that doorway into the hallway!
完了 我不小心踢到 直接踢进了走廊
Now, other people are kicking it
and it's sliding across the floor!
- Okay, this is getting absurd. - Let's get that phone!
Mr. Peanutbutter, you have been invited to the stage!
*Mr. Peanutbutter's House*
*Who's that dog?*
*Knick-knack, paddy-whack Give a dog a bone*
*Trying to catch a...*
Oh, there it goes. Oh!
Sorry. If you could just-- My phone!
I'm coming to get you!
*He's a dirty dog*
*He's just trying to do his job*
Come on, phone. Just stop!
- *Who's that dog?* - *Mr. Peanutbutter*
*Knick-knack, paddy-whack Give a dog a bone*
*Who's that dog?*
- Hello? - Mr. Peanutbutter.
I just, um... I wanted to give you a chance to say goodbye...
- Oh, no. -...to my twisted spleen.
Because it was successfully removed from my body!
Oh, my God, that's incredible!
Now, get out there and announce those Oscars!
Nominations. You got it, buddy.
Okay. Now, where's the... the...
Uh-oh. Could've sworn it was right here.
There you are. You need to get on stage.
Yes, just as soon as you give me that backup envelope,
please and por favor.
What back-up envelope? There is no back-up envelope.
That was a test and you passed.
Wunderbar. Now, let's get you out there.
太好了[德语] 行了 快上台吧
Yes, gotta get out there, on to the stage,
没问题 要出去了 然后上台
to announce the nominations.
Just as soon as I-- Oh, my God, is that Bradley Cooper?
只要我... 天哪 那是布莱德利·库珀吗
Bradley Cooper? We love him for some reason.
- Where? - Let's go, Todd.
-在哪里 -走吧 陶德
- Oh, God, what do we do? - It's okay.
-天哪 我们该怎么办 -没事的
We just need to come up with all the nominees ourselves.
But I haven't even seen all the movies.
Todd, nobody has. That's not how they give out awards.
陶德 没人看过 他们颁奖都不看影片的
- But-- - Time for talk is over.
Now's the time for action.
And by "Action," I mean talking about these 24 categories
until we've settled on a list of nominees.
You need to tell me right now, are you in or out?
Well, when you put it that way,
I guess you can call me high-waisted denim,
because, right now, I am very in.
What did you think of Frieda Pinto?
Are you kidding me? Anybody could do what she did.
"Don't take my baby. I'll give you all my Bitcoins!"
Okay, for Best Picture, what about Avatar?
That was a good movie.
True, but did that come out this year?
I feel like I just saw it.
Well, there's no way to know for sure.
Let's just throw it on the list.
Ooh, do we have Daniel Day-Lewis down for anything?
Good catch! I'll add him.
Okay. We need one more nominee for Best Actor.
Oh, what about BoJack?
His performance in Secretariat was as thoughtful and self-aware
as we've ever seen him.
- Besides, he's our friend. - Is he?
-再说 他是我们的朋友 -是吗
I am surprised to hear you say that, Todd Chavez.
Let's dig into that. We have time.
I don't think we do.
You're supposed to be announcing these, like, now.
There is always time to talk about our feelings.
As my Nana Peanutbutter used to say,
"There's always time to talk about feelings,
because feelings are the ceilings of our hearts,
and a leaky feeling ceiling leads to a flood of blood.
And I'm cold. Will you pass me that blanket?"
Well, I guess I'm just tired of BoJack walking all over everybody
and still getting everything he wants.
I think the important thing to remember here
is that BoJack is a damaged individual,
struggling against a sea of demons,
many self-created, but still all too real.
Getting this nomination from the two friends he loves the most--
you and also me-- would really mean a lot to him.
But did you really think he was that good in the movie?
Oh, I haven't seen it. It seemed long.
And the final nominee for Best Picture is Avatar.
Well, those are all the nominations.
I will not be taking any questions.
Goodbye. I must go.
I gotta say, we picked some top-notch noms.
Boy, was I glad when we got out of that theater, though.
I know. So many questions.
"Oh, what the hell happened?
Why were you reading off that napkin? Why are you guys running?"
They have their nominees. What more could they want?
You know what's crazy? We saved the day today,
and no one will ever even know.
Mr. Peanutbutter, we know what you did.
So, the good news is, my brother's surgery was a success.
And the bad news is, you're not nominated for an Oscar.
And the other good news is...
...that each breath is a gift
and it is a joy to live.
- What? - We are so lucky we get to be alive.
- No, before that. - Oh, I didn't tell you.
-不 前面那句 -我忘记告诉你了
- My brother's been sick. - No, I don't care about your brother.
First of all, manners.
Second of all, I think if you met him,
you'd actually really hit it off.
Imagine me but with less "in your face" cool guy attitude.
Did you say I'm not nominated for an Oscar?
A lot of people are mighty steamed,
but I feel like what everyone's overlooking here is,
I got most of the categories dead-on.
That's pretty amazing,
and I am not getting enough credit for that.
Did you know that Avatar came out in 2009?
- I'm not nominated for an Oscar. - No.
But you know what they say. "It's an honor just to be nominated."
So, I'm just like everybody else.
I know you're upset, but whatever you do,
please don't get mad at Todd.
Why would I get mad at Todd?
Exactly. This is totally my fault.
- He didn't even want to nominate you. - What?
With the gift of hindsight,
I see now how that might have made you even more upset.
But I realized something today,
when my brother called from the hospital,
and I think it's gonna make you feel a lot better.
- What? What is it? - None of this matters.
Okay, I'll see you later, buddy.
好了 回头见 老兄
As a partner in the company,
I am prepared to forgo my salary for the next three months,
but even then, we're going to need some sort of miracle.
What are we doing? What was the point of any of this?
I wasted everyone's time for six months.
Soon, I'll get some offer from one of the big five agencies
that I can't say no to,
and I'll go back to being another cog
in the giant Play-Doh spaghetti maker that is this industry.
- Is that the best I can hope for? - Not necessarily.
Although, there is one thing I should probably mention.
What is it, Judah?
Maybe this is an opportunity
to live one of your other eight lives.
It's been a pleasure working with you, Judah.
I found it to be an above average experience.
Please forgive me for getting emotional.
Rye, wheat, or sourdough?
Can I get it on stale?
And then, he said, I fetishize my own sadness.
What did you think was gonna happen? Why did you go there?
- Did you ask for water? - No.
They're not supposed to give us water unless we ask.
Don't they know there's a drought?
You want to send the water back?
No, I want the water. I just...
不 我想喝水 我只是...
I went to BoJack's house to congratulate him.
I'm not trying to pick fights.
Well, you don't have to see him at all if you don't want to.
It's not like you work for him anymore.
Is he right? Am I a bad person?
Who cares what he thinks?
Why do you have this weird fixation with him?
I do not have a fixation, Roxy. I worry about him.
我没有依恋他 洛克希 我只是担心他
Okay. And last year?
When you came back from Cordovia and needed a place to crash?
Oh, you could have stayed with me, or any of your other friends,
but you went right to his house.
Did you ever ask yourself why?
They're filling everyone's glasses. This is insane.
Oh, my God. What do you care?
Hey, excuse me? Excuse me?
Do you know you're breaking the law by giving everybody water?
It's okay. I want the water.
Yeah, we all want water. That's not the point.
没错 我们都想要水 问题不在这
In the state of California, it is illegal for a restaurant
to serve people water before they ask for it.
There is a drought.
Sit down! We're thirsty!
You know, this is what's wrong with society.
Nobody thinks about the world outside themselves.
So, how you doing? You still working at that place?
- Hello? - Hi, Ralph. It's Princess Carolyn.
-喂 -拉尔夫 我是卡洛琳公主
Oh, my God, Princess Carolyn,
I never thought I'd hear from you again.
I might have some free time coming up.
I was wondering if you might want to get a drink.
Okay. So, the night I met you after I said goodbye,
好 对了 我们相识然后分开后那晚
the craziest thing happened.
I was walking back to my car, when all of a sudden,
...tripped on a cobblestone, twisted her ankle,
- and tumbled into my arms. - What?
Turns out, she was a ballerina,
and she didn't speak a word of English.
So, I rushed her to the hospital,
and long story short, we eloped.
I moved to Russia,
and I'm totally messing with you. None of that's true.
- What? - I would love to see you again.
I think about you all the time.
- Really? - Yeah. How about this Saturday?
-真的吗 -当然 这周六如何
No, it's just me, giant chocolate Oscar guy.
不 是我 送巨型奥斯卡巧克力的
I'm here to pick up the giant chocolate Oscar.
My boss really wants our product
to only be seen with real Oscar nominees.
You know, to maintain the integrity of the giant chocolate Oscar.
I don't care. Take it.
You've reached Ana Spanakopita.
How did you get this number? Explain yourself.
Ana, this is the fourth time I've called.
Please call me back. I need you.
Ana, please. This is BoJack, by the way. Horseman.
安娜 求你了 对了 我是马男波杰克
Todd! Where you been?
- Oh, hi. - You were in Ojai?
-哦 嗨 -你去奥哈伊了
No, I was just saying hi.
Well, why not go to Ojai, huh?
You and me? I could use an escape, couldn't you?
你和我 我刚好需要逃避一下 你呢
It's not really a good time.
Todd, I need this.
You're my best friend and I need you.
Don't leave me now. Don't be like everybody else.
I'm not leaving you. I just--
Besides, I think you owe me, right?
再说了 是你欠我的 对吧
After what you did?
- What I did? - Come on, Todd. I know.
-我做了什么 -别装了 陶德 我知道了
- Mr. Peanutbutter told me everything. - Everything?
Even told you, when I was a kid,
I used to bang on my butt like a bongo drum
- when I got out of the bath? - What?
? Todd-o, me and Todd-o ?
? Bath time come Make Todd shiny and clean ?
Mm, no, not-not about that.
So, he didn't tell you everything.
Did he tell you about the time I counted to a million?
One, two, three, four, five, six--
- No, stop. - But I was just getting to the good part!
-没有 别数了 -但是精彩的部分才开始呢
He told me you didn't want to nominate me for an Oscar.
- Oh, that. - What the hell, man?
-那个啊 -怎么回事 伙计
After everything I've done for you?
What are you talking about?
Oh, I don't know. Letting you live here for free for six years?
indulging you in your little projects and adventures
and stories about how you used to bang on your butt
I let you turn my house
into your company's headquarters for the last month.
Yeah, but that's not because you're my friend.
That's because you felt bad about Emily.
You know about Emily?
I think I know. Why? What do you think I know?
我认为我知道 怎么 你认为我知道什么
I mean, I know what I think,
but I don't know if the thing
that I think is the thing that you think I know.
- You know? - So, you know I had sex with Emily.
You had sex with Emily?!
- Well, what did you think? - I don't know! Not that!
-你以为呢 -我不知道 反正不是那个
I just knew something sketchy happened.
I thought maybe you gave her one of your weird monologues
about how sad you are,
and it bummed her out!
Todd, I'm sorry, all right? I screwed up.
陶德 对不起 我搞砸了
I know I screwed up. I don't know why-- -
Oh, great! Of course! Here it comes!
You can't keep doing this!
You can't keep doing shitty things,
and then feel bad about yourself
like that makes it okay!
You need to be better!
I know. And I'm sorry, okay?
I was drunk, and there was all this pressure
with the Oscar campaign.
- But now-- Now that it's over, I-- - No! No, BoJack, just stop.
-但是现在都结束了 -不 波杰克 别说了
You are all the things that are wrong with you.
It's not the alcohol, or the drugs,
or any of the shitty things that happened to you in your career,
or when you were a kid.
All right? It's you.
Fuck, man. What else is there to say?
*Back in the '90s I was in a very famous TV show*
*I'm BoJack the Horseman*
*BoJack the Horseman don't act like you don't know*
*And I'm trying to hold on to my past*
*It's been so long I don't think I'm gonna last*
*I guess I'll just try and make you understand*
*That I'm more horse than a man*
*Or I'm more man than a horse*