我爱上的人是奇葩第三季双语台词对白剧本

闹钟

乔治·萧伯纳

"George Bernard Shaw."

乔治·萧伯纳

拼词游戏

Jimbo, you made me breakfast in bed?

吉宝你给我做了床上早餐吗

Yeah, right. What have you done to merit breakfast now?

是啊你是积了什么德能吃上早餐

Well, at least you brought me a mimosa.

你好歹还给我弄了杯含羞草鸡尾酒

Uh, no, that's my backup. It's stronger.

不那是我的醒脑酒比较烈

You might observe,

你可能发觉了

"Jimmy, how zoetic and vital you seem today."

"吉米你今天真是朝气蓬勃"

"How observant, G-dog,"

"观察力挺好小格子"

I might respond.

我可能会回答

For today, I build my tree house!

因为今天我要建造我的树屋

You see, during Vernon's podcast...

在做弗南的播客时

During what now?

什么玩意儿来着

I learned that my father's voice

我明白了在我全部的人生中

has been in my head my entire life.

我父亲的声音一直萦绕在我的脑中

Dude, I have the same thing, but with my mom's voice.

兄弟我也是不过是我妈的声音

- It's like she's constant... - Yeah, as I was saying about myself,

-就跟她总是... -对啊我自己也常说

ever since the funeral, that voice has been slowly subsiding.

葬礼之后那个声音就在慢慢减弱

It is my hope that the final nail in that tree house

我希望建完那个树屋后

will be the final nail in the coffin that is my father's influence.

我父亲的影响力能彻底消失

R.I.P., dickhead.

安息吧傻逼

I'm telling you, Gretchen,

我跟你说格雷琴

now that I have been de-fathered,

由于我现在没了爹

my world is positively pregnant with possibilities.

我的世界蕴满了可能性

Great, but isn't it your job to finish your book?

很好但你的工作不是把书写完吗

Is it?

是吗

I don't know anymore.

我已经不知道了

I guess I can't talk.

我还是别说话了

I'm reading goddamn self-help.

我在读该死的自助书

专注的内心

Oh, yes, that's sure to solve your myriad problems.

是啊一定能解决你那一大堆问题

My therapist recommended it.

我的心理医生推荐的

It's about mindfulness,

讲的是专注

- which is about being completely-- - ‭No!

-要完全... -不听

I think you'd actually like therapy.

我觉得你会喜欢心理治疗

It's really helpful to look at your life from a different perspective.

从不同的角度看待人生真的很有帮助

Like when they stood on the desks in Dead Poets Society.

就像《死亡诗社》里他们站在桌子上时

Didn't that one kid shoot himself?

那个小孩不是开枪自杀了吗

Like I'm learning

我在搞明白

how because of my mom's impossibly high expectations,

我妈妈不切实际的过高期待

I can never turn my brain off.

是怎么让我一刻不得安宁的

I am really opening the trunk and seeing what's inside.

我在努力打开脑子[后备箱]搞清楚里面有什么

Don't you mean the hood?

你应该是想说引擎盖吧

Your trunk's just cartons of Mexican cigarettes,

你的后备箱里只有烟盒子

old Halloween wigs

老旧的万圣节假发

and five bags of clothes you never donated to Goodwill.

以及五大包从没捐出去的衣服

I really need to get a handle on this mindfulness shit.

我真的需要掌握专注这玩意儿

I am doing the work.

我在努力

I'm evolving, Jimmy.

我在进化吉米

I just don't want you to get left behind.

我只是不希望你被抛在后面

I think I'll manage.

我觉得我可以凑合

Anyway, look.

话说看

Blueprints!

设计图

Do not touch with your syrup

别用你那沾满糖浆

and-God-knows-what-else-since you-don't-wash-your-legs hands.

天知道你摸过什么的爪子来碰毕竟你不洗腿

Look at us!

瞧瞧我们

You're changing careers to building tree houses.

你要改变职业方向去建树屋

I'm exploring the roots of my mental illness.

我在探索我心理不正常的根源

Hey, before we change too much, you want to knock one out?

在我们改变太多之前来一发呗

Sure.

好啊

Eh, you can start. I'll catch up.

你先来段前戏我马上跟进

翻译大叔酱 TVyoung 洗七里

■

翻译梅菜扣肉泽生

时间轴阿包加森后期加森

校对 Ethan-泽生总监 Ethan-泽生

我爱上的人是奇葩第三季第十集

Let's do this.

我们开始吧

‭Nothing can slow me down,

没有什么能使我放慢脚步

but who says that eating on the run...

但谁说上班路上赶着吃饭...

What is going on?

这是怎么了

You have been blowing up all morning.

你一整个早上都不停地有消息进来

High Times tweeted my Dr. Weed video,

网红麻神转发了我那个《大麻医生》的视频

and now I'm getting all these annoying tweets from stoners.

现在那些瘾君子给我发了好多烦人的消息

I don't want to be a pot person.

我可不想做一个大麻男

You make videos with a character called "Dr. Weed,"

你用一个叫大麻医生的人物拍原创视频

and you smoke all day, every day.

你还成天抽大麻每天抽

Listen, Dorothy,

听着多洛希

I stopped taking my meds.

我停药了

- What? You went off your meds and you didn't tell me? ‭- Yeah.

-什么你停药了却没告诉我 -对

I didn't want to, you know, declare anything

我不想过早地宣布什么

until I saw how it worked, and listen,

我得先看到效果才行听着

a lot of vets are using weed to help with their PTSD.

很多老兵都用大麻治疗自己的创伤后应激障碍

I mean, sure, I might take a little longer to do some things.

的确我可能做事要慢一些

Like this morning, I laughed for 15 minutes

比如今早因为浴室的水龙头神似人脸

because the bathroom faucet kind of looks like a face.

我就足足笑了15分钟

But I feel...

但我...

really good.

感觉很好

Better than I have in...

很久都没...

forever.

从未这么好过

Okay, well, then good.

好吧那行

I am so glad that you finally found something that works.

我很高兴你终于找到了有用的办法

And if you do turn into a lazy pothead,

要是你真成了懒惰的瘾君子

then you can always be my house husband.

你可以一直做我的家庭主夫

Speaking of which, let's do this.

说到这个我们开始吧

Nothing can slow me down,

没什么能放慢我的脚步

but who says that eating on the run has to be boring?

但谁说上班路上赶着吃饭一定得无聊

With Snack Hacker Snacker Boxes,

有了零食小餐盒

I get my daily recommended allowance of fun.

我每天都能快乐一下

Will you knock it off and eat your goddamn nachos like a person!

你能消停会儿吗吃个玉米片也得有个人样

What's wrong with you?

你是有什么毛病啊

My therapist said I have to practice mindfulness,

我的心理医生说我得练习专注

so I am focusing on the flavor of the food,

所以我在专心感受食物的味道

the mouth feel, the swallowing,

质感吞咽感

the reflecting... on my swallowing.

对于我的吞咽的思考

Jesus Christ, it's like trying to eat an area rug.

苍天啊简直跟吃地毯一样

Eating slow?

慢慢吃

But less food in mouth.

每次少塞点进嘴里

Did you know that things your parents did when you were a kid

你知道吗你的小时候父母的行为

can affect you as an adult?

会对成年的你产生影响

What?! You mean time travel?

什么你是说时间旅行吗

Everything was a competition with my mom--

我妈凡事都喜欢和别人攀比

grades, tennis, who had a lower BMI, even television.

成绩网球谁体重指数低甚至电视

During Wheel,

看《幸运之轮》时

she'd make me solve the puzzle before the contestants.

她会让我抢在选手之前解出谜题

All this time, I thought my mom was scary but dope.

一直以来我认为我妈很凶但人很棒

Turns out she wasn't dope at all.

事实证明她一点也不棒

So she's not dope.

所以她不棒

This morning I realized my entire life,

今早我意识到我这一生

I've had my mom's judgey voice in my head.

脑海里都萦绕着我妈的批评声

If I don't learn to replace it with something else mo' better,

如果我不学着用更好的事物取代

I am screwed.

我就毁了

Hot! Hot!

烫烫

Hot.

烫

Wait.

等等

No, no, no, no!

别别别

That's what you get for disrespecting nachos.

这就是你不尊重玉米片的后果

Okay, so here's your pie flight,

好了这是您的派拼盘

double cream lemon, Kahlúa cream cheese and chocolate satin.

双倍柠檬奶油甘露乳酪巧克力脆皮

Aw, I'm eating for two for the last time.

这是我最后一嘴管两个人的肚子了

Well, you had a good run.

你已经很成功了

- You ready, lady? - ‭Yup.

-准备好了吗小姐 -好了

Let's go get this abobo.

去堕胎吧

Dad?

爸

Dad?

爸

He's gone.

他不在了

Yes!

太好了

A toast to my triumph,

为我的胜利举杯

my creation completed after an honest day of manual labor,

经过一天的辛勤劳作我的作品终于完成了

like the people.

就像劳动人民

Like men.

就像男子汉

Thank you Herr Hammer.

谢谢你锤子先生

I could not have done it without you.

没有你的帮助我肯定无法完成

I'll meet you below for a celebratory Pilsner shortly.

等会儿我们在下面喝啤酒庆祝

Madame Level,

水平尺夫人

you have been integral to my success,

我的成功和你密不可分

from your green liquid to your bubble.

感谢你的绿色液体和气泡

A bientot.

回见

Senor... Drilly.

电钻先生

I counted on you most of all.

我对你的依赖是最大的

Go.

去吧

Enjoy a Campari on me.

喝杯金巴利酒我请客

Ciao, amigo.

再见朋友

Oh, man, so many of the girls that I coach are here.

天啊好多姑娘都是我指导过的

It's like if you dig the student,

如果你喜欢某个学生

you're really gonna love the master, right?

那也一定会喜欢其老师对吧

You're gonna kill it.

你肯定很出色的

Hey, Dorothy.

你好多洛希

You signed in for "Cute Yoga Girl,"

你报名的是"可爱的瑜伽女孩"

but I think we got our wires crossed with your agent.

但我们可能和你的经纪人没沟通好

We were actually excited to see you for "Overworked Mom."

我们其实想看你演"过度操劳的母亲"

Oh, okay. Great.

可以很好

Awesome. We have a bathrobe you can just put on.

太好了你可以穿这个浴袍

- Yeah. - ‭Excellent.

-好的 -好极了

Are you sure this is okay?

你确定这样行吗

You practiced the other one.

你练习的是另一个角色

Edgar, this kind of stuff happens all the time.

埃德加这种事时有发生

It's part of the biz.

干这行就是这样

Okay, I'm gonna go in the bathroom

好了我要去一下洗手间

and rub off some of this under eye concealer

把我的下眼部遮瑕霜抹掉

so I look super beat.

那样会看着很劳累

Fuck.

操

Do you need more weed?

你需要更多大麻吗

- You're Dr. Weed, right? - Yeah.

-你是大麻医生对吧 -是

I'm Doug Benson.

我是道格·本森

Oh, yeah, the, uh... the pot comedy guy.

对哦那个做大麻喜剧的

Among other things, but sure, that's the brand.

我还有其他作品但没错就是这个牌子

Edgar Quintero.

我是埃德加·坤塔罗

Super funny vids, man.

超搞笑的视频伙计

You should swing by my "Office" sometime.

你有时间可以来我办公室坐坐

I've got a project I think you might be interested in.

我有个项目你应该会感兴趣

Yeah. That... that would be great.

好啊那真是太好了

So, what are you auditioning for?

你是来试镜什么角色的

Oh, I just nailed the role of "Sleepy Dad."

我刚刚拿下了"瞌睡的爸爸"这个角色

Do you have a diagnosis for my character?

你对我的角色有什么诊断吗

My diagnosis is...

我的诊断是...

you need more sleep.

你需要更多睡眠

Just kidding.

逗你的

You need more weed!

你需要更多大麻

I thought that was going to be the diagnosis.

我就觉得诊断结果会是这个

Why do cats get to have all the good tongues?

为什么猫咪的舌头那么好使

You sure you're okay if I don't go in with you?

你确定我不陪你进去没问题吧

- I really have to do this meditation app. - Sure.

-我必须试试这个冥想软件 -没问题

I'll go in alone. They know me.

我自己去他们认识我

Great, so, you'll be out in

很好所以你只需在里面

- 40, 45 minutes. - ‭40, 45 minutes.

-40到45分钟 -40到45分钟

保罗: 干嘛呢

保罗:我续签了你的护照我还把你的车收回来了又把油箱的弹珠都取出来了

我真是为你高兴到月亮上去了

保罗:不过严格来说月球不存在"上面"因为太空中没有明确的方向

保罗:我老板刚吼了我因为我在开会时发太多信息

保罗:糟了我打这段时他又瞪了我一眼到此为止回头聊

And another thing, Jillian, you are--

还有件事吉利安你...

- Who are you texting? - Can you hear him?

-你在给谁发信息 -你听到他了吗

He's yelling at me right now.

他正在吼我呢

Why can't I stop texting? I guess I just miss you so much.

我为什么不停发信息我可能是太想你了

- Bye! - Give me that phone. Give...

-拜拜 -把手机给我给我...

Difficult decision, huh?

艰难的决定是吧

Yeah.

是啊

Would you like to chat?

你想聊聊吗

Maybe I can help you figure out some of your troubles.

也许我可以帮你排解一些问题

Thanks.

谢谢

So, what's bothering you?

所以你的烦恼是

婴儿杀手

Well... it started when...

说起来一切都始于...

All right. Let's do this shit.

好了开始吧

During this meditation

在这次冥想过程中

we will focus on being...

我们要全力做到...

Mindful.

专注

Mindful,

专注

Where you are not in the past,

你不是活在过去

not in the future,

不是活在未来

- but in... - Present.

-而是活在 -当下

...The present.

活在当下

Easy. Next.

太容易下一句

Clear your mind and focus on your...

让头脑变得清醒注意力集中于...

Breathing.

呼吸

Surroundings.

周围的环境

Shit.

操

And your breathing.

和你的呼吸

Yes! Suck it, lady.

没错吃屎吧婆娘

Notice the rise and fall of your chest.

注意你胸腔的起伏

Notice the rise...

注意起伏...

Oh, God, so boring, I want to kill myself.

我的天无聊到我想自杀

Eject, eject, eject.

不听不听王八念经

Edgar?

埃德加

Edgar!

埃德加

Where the hell is he?

他死哪儿去了

Sure, when I'm trying to have sex in my kitchen,

是啊当我想在厨房来一炮的时候

he's constantly underfoot, but now...

他总是阴魂不散而现在呢

Trees.

树啊

Trees.

树啊

What if Pauline Two...

如果波琳2号...

No, I am not writing today.

不我今天不要写作

No, no, Malcolm!

不不要马尔科姆

Shut up!

闭嘴

Characters, stop speaking through me.

各位角色别再通过我来说话了

Oh, my God, chapter 12. I could have Simon

天啊第12章我可以让萨蒙

jump up on the speakers at the oasis set at Glastonbury.

跳到格拉斯顿伯里音乐节绿洲舞台的话筒边讲话

No, I am.... not-not doing this!

不我...我不要这样

Oh, Simon, you brilliant, horny bastard.

萨蒙你个机智的淫荡小混蛋

Suck it, Dad, I'm still a writer.

滚蛋吧爸我还是个作家

Oh, no, not today.

不今天不行

So then I heated up the condom in the microwave

然后我用微波炉加热了避孕套

and I got a turkey baster.

然后我拿了根火鸡吸油管

Wait, I need you to back up.

等等倒退回去一点

Okay, so I wanted a popsicle...

好吧我当时想吃冰棒

Lindsay, do not let those pro-life assholes

琳赛别让这些反堕胎混蛋

talk you out of your legal right!

劝你放弃你的法定权利

It's okay.

没事的

I was already having second thoughts before this nice lady came over.

在这位好心的女士出现前我已经犹豫了

What, why?

什么为什么

If Paul and I get divorced,

如果保罗和我离婚了

I'm not gonna have a family anymore.

我就没有家庭了

Family.

家庭啊

Name one family that's just one person.

世上哪有只有一个人的家庭

Suddenly Susan.

《出乎意料的苏珊》

Listen, I know

听着我知道

that becoming a real human being is a scary thing,

变成一个真正的人类是很可怕的事

but I'll help you.

但我会帮你的

I got your back always.

我始终挺你

Thanks, Gretch.

谢谢你格雷琴

All right.

好了

I'm ready.

我准备好了

Bam, nice try, terrorists.

砰失败了吧恐怖分子

Another victory for women's rights.

女权再次获得了胜利

Actually, I was gonna tell her to do it.

实际上我原本是要劝她去堕胎的

In my book, there are extenuating circumstances --

在我的原则里有些情有可原的堕胎情况

rape, incest and...

强奸乱伦...

whatever this is.

以及这种奇葩情况

DB国际股份有限公司

Mr. Benson will see you now.

本森先生现在可以见您了

No, no.

不行不行

No.

不行

I'm walking away from the table.

我要走人了

I'll call you from the chopper.

我上了直升机再打给你

Sorry, I had to handle that

不好意思我得在

before the European markets closed.

欧洲市场收盘前搞定那一单

This-um-this place isn't what I was expecting.

这地方和我想象中的不太一样

Listen, I was looking at my third quarter staffing budget

听着我刚审查过我第三季度的雇员预算

and I'd like to offer you a few days

我在为位智地图制作节目

punch up on a show I'm doing for WAZE.

我想请你来写几天段子

The GPS app? Isn't that dangerous?

那个导航应用吗那样不危险吗

You'd think so,

你第一反应可能是这样

but no, the show's only gonna play at stop lights and in traffic.

但实则不然节目只在红灯和塞车时播放

So, what do you think you should be paid?

那么你理想中的薪水是多少

$300?

300美元

- Done. - Yes!

-没问题 -太好了

Yes.

太好了

Hey, you want to, uh...

对了你想不想...

light up and celebrate?

抽一口庆祝一下

Edgar, this is a place of business.

埃德加这里是办公场所

Thank you.

谢谢你

You okay?

你还好吗

What are you thinking about?

你在想什么

Pie.

馅饼

You're thinking about what you're eating right now?

你在想你正在吃的东西吗

Of course. If I'm eating pie,

当然我在吃馅饼

I'm thinking pie.

我就在想馅饼

If I have a fork in my mouth,

如果叉子伸进嘴里了

I'm thinking fork.

我就在想叉子

You just had an abortion,

你刚刚去堕了胎

you're divorcing your husband,

你要和你老公离婚了

and you're literally only thinking about

而你现在唯一在想的

what's happening in this moment?

真的只是此时此刻正在发生的事吗

Guess so.

我想是的

Strawtini.

草莓马提尼

You might be some kind of secret mindfulness guru.

你搞不好是个隐秘的专注大师

I'm gonna take notes.

我要记点笔记

Just, uh, speak your thoughts out, okay?

就把你的想法都说出来好吗

Strawtini.

草莓马提尼

Chew, chew,

嚼嚼

chew, little fart.

嚼小屁

Waitress is coming over.

服务员过来了

Here she is. Hi.

她来了你好

- Can I get you anything else? - Talking to me.

-你们还需要点什么吗 -跟我说话

Talking to me.

跟我说话

My turn to talk.

轮到我说话了

Neck mole,

脖子痣

boobs.

奶子

Bye, waitress.

再见服务员

I miss her.

我想她了

Gretchen's still here.

格雷琴还在

Hi, Gretchen.

你好格雷琴

Baby ears.

婴儿耳

Ooh, a hang nail.

有根倒刺

Pie again.

再吃馅饼

I had such a productive day.

我今天的成果太丰硕了

I just made $80 cleaning out

我替比弗利山庄的

this rich old lady's closet in Beverly Hills.

富人老太太清理衣柜赚了80美元

Awesome.

好极了

I have good news, too.

我也有好消息

Ooh, did Jimmy make you buy more of those

吉米又让你买了更多

disgusting candies that I like?

我喜欢的那种恶心糖果吗

Rum Christophers?

朗姆糖吗

No.

没有

I got offered a job,

我得到一份工作

writing for Doug Benson's new show.

替道格·本森的新节目当编剧

Wait, what?

等等什么

- Really? ? - Yeah.

-真的吗 -是啊

You got a job writing comedy for a TV show?

你得到一份替喜剧电视节目写剧本的工作吗

Yeah. I mean, it's a short-term gig

是啊不过是份短期工作

a-and there are a ton of liability waivers I have to sign,

我还得签数不清的免责协议

but still.

不过依然很不错

That's-- you know that I know Doug, right?

你知道我是认识道格的对吧

Did you tell him that we're dating?

你跟他说了我们在恋爱吗

No, I didn't know you knew him.

没有我不知道你认识他啊

Oh, yeah, for years.

当然认识好多年了

Like, way back when he was doing his show at the theater,

可以追溯到他当年做话剧的时候

I used to bring him waters.

我经常给他端茶倒水呢

I can't believe that you didn't know

我真不敢相信你竟然不知道

that I know Doug.

我认识道格

You totally should've told him.

你绝对应该告诉他的

He would have lost his mind.

他一定震惊得说不出话

Anyway, congratulations.

总之恭喜了

That is so cool that he's giving you this opportunity.

他肯给你这个机会真是太好了

I... I mean,

我我觉得...

I thought you didn't want to be a pot guy.

我还以为你不想当大麻男呢

I don't.

我的确不想

But now I'm a pot guy with a J-O-B.

但现在我是个有工作的大麻男

Can you believe it?

你敢相信吗

I'm a comedy writer!

我是个喜剧编剧了

- I totally can't. - And...

-我完全不敢相信 -并且...

I couldn't...have ever done it... without you, teach.

如果没有你我是不可能做到的老师

How about I go upstairs

不如我上楼去

and I...

然后...

whip us up some of my famous breakfast soup dumplings?

做一些我最拿手的早餐汤饺

Ooh, I love that.

我好喜欢

I'll be right up.

我一会儿就上来

Everything looks so different from up here.

从这上面看一切都好不一样

Walk.

走路

Couch.

沙发

Remote.

遥控器

Uh-huh, there is a "J."

J字母出现了

If you can solve the puzzle right now...

如果你能现在破解谜题...

Wheel.

《幸运之轮》

There is a jackpot of nearly $10,000

除了你现在所获得的奖金

in addition to the money you have.

还能获得近一万美元的奖励哦

If not, you have to either

如果破解不了你要么

buy a vowel or spin the wheel.

买个元音字母要么转轮盘

- I'll solve the puzzle. - Go ahead.

-我想破解谜题 -开始吧

"I Have The Wine" By Johnny Cash.

约翰尼·卡什的歌曲《我有红酒》

Oh, my God, you are so...

天啊你真是...

That is not correct.

回答不正确

Nope, just watch.

不对继续淡定地看

Jason.

杰森

Wheel. B.

轮盘 B

Breathe.

呼吸

"L," Please.

请给我L字母

Yes, two "L's."

好的两个L

Pick up that gift tag...

拿起那个礼物标志...

Notice...

注意到

the rise...and fall of your chest.

胸腔的起伏

Good news.

好消息

I'm hella mindful now.

我现在很专注

Why are you covered in yard?

你怎么浑身都是泥土

I did what you said.

我照你说的做了

I looked at my life from an outside perspective.

我以外部视角看了看我的生活

Yeah. Doesn't it feel great?

好吧感觉很棒不是吗

No, it was terrifying.

不是很吓人

I didn't recognize any of it.

我完全不认识了

What?

什么

I don't recognize my life.

我不认识我的生活了

I don't know whether I made any of the right decisions.

我不知道我的每一个决定是否正确

Everything could be wrong.

一切都可能是错的

Everything?

一切吗

Everything.

一切

It's "I Walk the Line."

正确答案是《一往无前》

我爱上的人是奇葩 第三季 You're the Worst Season 3 第10集: 和我说话 Talking to Me, Talking to Me

台词

我爱上的人是奇葩第三季 You're the Worst Season 3 第10集: 和我说话 Talking to Me, Talking to Me