我爱上的人是奇葩第三季双语台词对白剧本

"Simon and Kitty stood before

"萨蒙和凯蒂站在

"Pauline's crumbling fieldstone marker.

波琳的碎石墓碑前

"Moments later, in a nearby crypt,

片刻过后在附近的一个地窖里

"Simon repeatedly plunged into Kitty,

萨蒙不停地进出凯蒂的身体

"The sounds of their passion

他们激情欢爱的声音

"Mixing with the wet summer air

与湿润的夏夜晚风

and the cicadas' desperate, deafening, doomed song."

以及夏蝉绝望喧扰又凄惨的歌声交织在了一起"

The end.

全书终

I inspired the ending!

结局是受我启发的哦

You should put in the part about pulling out

你应该描写一下他是体外射精的

so she doesn't have a ghost baby.

这样她才不会怀上鬼胎

Just kidding.

开玩笑的啦

- I think it's perfect. - I am so happy with it.

-我觉得这简直完美 -我非常满意

I mean, a theme that I hadn't planned on exploring

我原本没有打算探索的一个主题

was the fallacy of the very concept of the familial paradigm in art.

就是艺术中的家庭范式这一概念的谬误

I mean, the idea still persists

我是说这个观念仍然坚称

that family, somehow, automatically prescribes closeness.

家庭就必然地与亲密相关

Family is portrayed as a safe harbor, but nay,

家庭被描述成安全的港湾其实才不是

it is often the very Charybdis that yanks us to the fathoms.

它往往是神话里的女妖会把我们拖下水

- But not you, buddy. - ‭Not me.

-但你不会老兄 -我才不会

I am post-family.

我是个后家庭主义者

You are looking, finally, at a truly free man.

你眼前的这位终于成为了一个真正的自由人

Like Thoreau.

就像梭罗一样

Or the Unabomber.

或是大学炸弹客

美国数学家为对抗现代科技而举行了全国性的投放炸弹行动

So...

所以...

are we okay?

可以开始了吗

Oh, my God, do we really have to do thi...?

天呐我们真要做这...

Nope, nope, just checking.

不不只是问一下而已

Did you hear about this murder off Mulholland?

你有没有听说穆赫兰道上发生的一起谋杀案

What?

什么

It was four days ago.

就发生在4天之前

They found this girl.

他们发现了被害的女孩

And-- oh, that is gruesome!

而且...哦太可怕了

"Murder, She Tweeted"?

@女博主与谋杀案

典出经典剧集《女作家与谋杀案》

How do I not follow this account?

我怎么会没关注这个账号呢

碎尸让警方震惊

Her head was chopped off.

她的头被砍下

Her blood was drained?

鲜血流干

Bloody symbols on the rocks?

石头上有血迹画成的符号

Jimmy!

吉米

This happened right near our house.

这就在我们家附近

It could've been me!

受害者也可能会是我

- Can we go look? - No way!

-我们能去看看不 -没门

It sounds very scary.

听上去挺吓人的

Jimmy.

吉米

Please?

求你了

Please.

求求你

Please?

求你了啦

Fine!

好吧

You creepy, creepy murder girl.

你这个变态的凶案痴迷者

Yay!

好耶

They say, when a murder scene is fresh,

有人说如果凶杀刚发生不久

you can still smell the fear in the air.

你仍然可以在空气里嗅到恐惧的味道

And afterwards, we can swing by Echo Park and get paletas.

然后我们还可以绕道回声公园买点水果冰棒

翻译阿夏 TVyoung

■

翻译 Ethan-泽生

时间轴加森后期加森

校对 Ethan-泽生总监 Ethan-泽生

我爱上的人是奇葩第三季第十三集本季终

Anyway, the show's called Doug Loves Sketches,

总之节目的名字叫《道格爱喜剧》

and it's a full-time gig.

并且这是个全职工作

Like, this is what I'm doing for a living now.

现在这就是我的生计了

I'm a comedy writer.

我是名喜剧编剧

Can I get some salty black sauce for this egg rice?

能给我点酱油配这个鸡蛋饭吗

- Yeah. - Where's your food?

-当然 -你的早饭呢

Oh, I only have enough left for Jimmy.

剩下的只够给吉米吃了

Anyway, I'm super excited,

总之我超激动

but I'm also kind of nervous to tell Dorothy.

但我也有点忐忑不敢告诉多洛希

'Cause you're writing for an Internet show and nobody cares about that?

因为你在给一部无人问津的网剧写段子吗

She's been really low lately

她最近情绪特别低落

and this might hurt her feelings.

这可能会伤害到她

So what?

那又怎样

Brah, she's taking that "D" on the reg;

老兄她就是个挨操的骚货

it's her job to support you.

支持你是她的责任

You got to speak up and tell people what you want.

你得把你想要的大声说出来让大家知道

You are the master of your own destiny.

你就是自身命运的主宰

Don't be a martyr.

别做牺牲者

I was a martyr.

我以前就是个牺牲者

I almost martyred my husband,

我差点牺牲了我丈夫

but I didn't.

但我并没有

You're right, Lindsay.

你说得对琳赛

I should put myself first.

我应该把自己放在首位

So,

那么

can I have some of your breakfast sushi?

能让我吃块你的早餐寿司吗

Sorry, I licked it all already.

不好意思我都舔过了

This is gonna be so rad.

一定会超级刺激的

Maybe they marked where the body is

或许他们还标示了尸体的位置

and I can lie down in it

我能躺在那个轮廓线内

and experience her terror.

亲身体验到她的恐惧

Oh, my God, It's so ugly.

天呐太丑了

It looks like the fox in the Nine Inch Nails video

看上去就像是九寸钉的MV里那只

that's being eaten by ants.

被蚂蚁蚕食掉的狐狸

It looks like it should be screaming at an old lady

它就像在朝奇异双胞胎乐团的MV里

in an Aphex Twin video.

那个老妇人尖叫

Why is its face so swollen?

脸怎么会这么肿啊

Did Becca give birth directly over a beehive?

贝卡是在马蜂窝上生的孩子吗

Even at an illegal baby mill, they'd be like,

即使在非法的接生作坊他们也应该是

"Yeah, that's okay. We're good."

"没事儿我们挺好哒"

Oh, shitsticks!

我靠

Jimmy, Five-O!

吉米条子

Good spotting, Goose.

眼力不错呆子赶快跑

- Yeah? - 17 seconds. New record.

-怎么样 -17秒新纪录

Okay.

很好

Okay.

好了

Page one-- preliminary settlement offer.

第一页初步和解提议

You're supposed to write it on a piece of paper

你应该把它写在一张纸上

and slide it over.

然后进行滑动翻页

Watch.

瞧好了

Here's my initial offer.

这是我的初步提议

This is just a drawing of a cat.

你只是画了一只猫而已

It's just a starting point.

这只是个开始

It's called a negotiation.

这就叫"谈判"

Now, you go.

现在该你说了

My initial spousal support offer is $2,000.

关于配偶赡养费我初步开2000美元

Accepted!

接受

$2,000 a month, Lindsay.

2000美元一个月琳赛

I know, that's so much money.

我知道好多钱哦

I accept.

我接受

Negotiations are over.

谈判结束

You know, you have to pay for your own apartment.

你得自己付公寓的房租

Great. How much are apartments, like two hundo?

很好房租能有多少呢两百块吗

So, that's good.

不错啊

No, Lindsay.

不琳赛

It's bad.

很糟糕

It's really, really bad.

非常非常糟糕

I'm cucking you now.

现在是我对你不忠

I'm the hot wife.

我是性感人妻

I do not like this piece of paper.

我不喜欢这张纸

I'm finally getting what I want,

我终于得到自己想要的了

and what I want

我想要的

is to watch you burn.

就是看着你玩火自焚

‭Oh, yes.

没错

Burn!

燃烧

Okay. Page two-- 401K distributions.

好了第2页养老保险分配

Uh, hi. Uh, Edgar Quintero.

你好我是埃德加·坤塔罗

- I have a meeting with Doug. - Oh, sure.

-我和道格约好了见面 -好的

Have a seat, Mr. Benson will be right with you.

请坐本森先生马上会见你

Oh, uh, hey.

对了

What happened to the other assistant?

之前那个助理呢

She died.

她死了

Mugging in broad daylight.

光天化日之下抢劫

Fortunately, the guy she mugged is gonna be fine.

幸运的是她抢的那个人没有大碍

It's a joke.

开玩笑的

It was stomach cancer. She went quick.

是胃癌她死得很突然

Hey, can I ask you a question?

我能问你个问题吗

Do you like your job?

你喜欢你的工作吗

It's pretty great.

非常棒

It really suits my lifestyle.

很符合我的生活方式

I just sit around all day, answer some calls.

就整天闲坐着接接电话

You're supposed to throw away your personal food at the end of the week,

你应该在一周后把没吃完的食物都扔掉

but a lot of people don't.

但很多人都不会扔

Gwen might be done with that açaí bowl,

格温也许不会再吃甜品碗了

but Dutch isn't.

但达奇可不会

Well, would you ever give up your job for a relationship?

你会为了一段感情放弃自己的工作吗

Well, that is completely out of the blue.

这问题可真是太突然了

Edgar.

埃德加

- Come on in. - Thanks.

-进来 -谢了

What's up?

还好吗

Uh, listen, Doug.

是这样道格

I can't do the show.

我没法做这个喜剧了

- My girlfriend... - Sloppy-blowjob Dorothy?

-我女朋友... -口交贱女多洛希吗

W-What? Um...

什什么...

A-Anyway, she's...

总之她...

she's been going through a really tough time,

她在经历一个很艰难的时期

and I feel like my having this opportunity

我觉得我得到这次机会

is making her feel worse.

会让她更不好受

I see. Well, I'll be sad to see you go.

明白你退出我会很惋惜的

Dutch, can you get me UTA?

达奇帮我联系下联合人才公司

I need some lower level writer résumés.

我需要一些低水平编剧的简历

I don't know, maybe I'm making a mistake.

我也说不好也许这是错误的决定

I'm supposed to be supporting her, but really, by quitting,

我应该支持她但如果真的退出

I'm not standing up for my needs,

我就没有维护我的需求

which is ultimately bad for our relationship.

这最终对我们的感情也很不好

So, maybe I shouldn't quit.

所以我或许不该退出

Oh, cool!

很好

So, you just came into my office to not quit.

所以你来我办公室就是说不想退出的

That's a pretty good use of my time.

真是完全"没有"浪费我的时间啊

So now I get to go to your house with a sandwich

所以现在我该拿个三明治去你家

and be like, "I don't want this sandwich."

然后说"我不想要这个三明治了"

But then say, "I want this sandwich," And then explain why?

接着说"我想要这个三明治" 然后解释缘由

- So, I get to do that now? - Sure.

-所以我可以这么做了吗 -当然

That's actually a really great bit.

那其实是个很不错的桥段

Get a camera, shoot it over the weekend.

找个摄像机在周末把它拍了

I'll get Andy Richter to play the sandwich

我会让安迪·瑞切特出演三明治

and I'll see you on Monday.

我们周一见吧

All right.

好的

Cool.

很好

All right, man.

好了伙计

I just e-mailed Doug my letter of resignation.

我刚把辞职信发给道格了

- What? - I'm willing to try this with you, dude.

-什么 -我愿意和你试一试哥们

I really don't think I'm gay,

我不觉得我是同性恋

but is my life so perfect

但真是因为我的生活太完美

that I can afford to be closed off?

足以让我一直思想封闭吗

And when you think about it,

其实仔细想想

homosexuality really suits my lifestyle--

同性恋真心符合我的生活方式

sitting around,

闲坐着

- chugging cold ones, playing vids...- What? No. ‭

-喝喝啤酒打打游戏 -什么不

Assume you got to suck a dick once in a while, but whatever.

可能时不时得舔个鸡巴不过也无所谓

I've put weirder things in my mouth.

我含过更奇葩的东西

I-I-I was talking about me and my girlfriend.

我说的是我和我女朋友

What?

什么

Oh, no!

糟了

I just told Doug Benson I quit

我刚告诉道格·本森我不干了

and to kiss my gay ass!

还叫他舔我的基佬屁股

He's been nothing but nice to me!

他一直对我很好啊

Why do I keep doing this?

我为什么总是这样

Hey-hey, Doug.

听我说道格

What the hell is going on?

这他妈怎么回事

- It was-- I'm not gay. - Are you kidding?

-这...我不是同性恋 -开玩笑吗

I mean, I might be gay, but I'm not-- I don't think I am.

我是说我可能是同性恋但我...我应该不是

I can't get an Uber to pick me up.

叫不到优步车来接我了

- I think my rating's too low. - What's yours?

-应该是我的评分太低了 -你的呢

Oh, bad. Apparently, they don't like it

很糟显然他们不喜欢

when you call multiple companies

你同时叫多个公司的司机

and make them race to pick you up.

叫他们比赛看谁最先到

Becca's gonna be the worst mom.

贝卡将是最糟糕的妈妈

You can tell just by looking at a kid,

你只需要看看孩子

if they have good or bad parents.

就能知道他们的爸妈是好是坏

Well, how?

怎么看出

Okay.

好吧

See that kid-- black dress socks,

看那个孩子黑丝袜那个

stained shirt?

脏兮兮的T恤

His parents don't give a shit.

他的父母一点都不关心他

Now, that one with the perfect fade, pressed shirt, he's totally hot.

再看那个发型完美衬衫平整帅呆了

His parents care a shit ton.

他父母肯定相当关心他

When I'm a mom, my kid is gonna look fly as hell

我要是当妈妈我的孩子一定时髦炸了

'cause I'm gonna care the shit out of that kid.

因为我会关心死那个孩子

That kid's not that hot.

那孩子没多帅

Now, that kid,

再看那个孩子

he's tanned a perfect bronze,

晒了一身完美的古铜色

his bod is banging.

身材超棒

He doesn't even have a six-pack.

他连6块腹肌都没有

Check out midriff.

看那个露腰的

Oh! That ass!

哇这美臀

Like it was carved out of marble. ‭

仿佛是大理石雕琢出的

I think you two should leave.

我觉得你们两个该走了

- How dare you? - ‭Who even becomes a third-grade teacher anyhow?

-好大胆子 -什么人才会去当三年级老师啊

This has nothing to do with you.

这和你没有一点关系

Oh, I'm not nurturing enough to be a Kindergarten teacher,

我不够关怀孩子当不了幼儿园老师

This is between us and the urchins.

这是我们和孩子间的事

but I can quite master compound sentences.

但我对复合句相当了解

Why don't you just go back to your job, you old cow?

何不继续做你的事去你这个老母牛

Where do I belong?

我属于哪里

提醒加丝蒂娜·乔丹刚刚抵达伊顿代尔洛杉矶下午1:06

Hey, my therapist is at Edendale.

我的心理医生在伊顿代尔呢

Want to come watch me yell at her?

想不想去看我吼她

You mean, instead of going to the murder place?

你是说不去犯罪现场了

Oh, hell no. On the way.

当然不是顺路去看

I just need you to see how awesome I've gotten at heckling her.

我就是想让你看看我在黑她时有多棒

I found out she has diabetes--

我发现她有糖尿病

really opened things up,

真是茅塞顿开

high-ass sugar-having bitch.

高血糖的婊子

Huh, then we'll stop by the house and pick up the car.

那我们顺便回下房子把车取上

Can you at least give me some money up-front to get started?

你能不能至少先给我点钱让我起步

Please.

拜托了

Did you just actually open up a bank app and deposit it

你刚刚是打开银行应用把钱存了

or did you just take a photo of it?

还是单纯地拍了张照片

What are you talking about?

你在说什么

Did you observe people using e-check deposit

你是不是看过别人用电子支票存款

and now, as a result,

结果现在

think you can just take a photo

你觉得你只需要拍个照片

and it magically goes into your bank account?

钱就会神奇地进入你的银行账户

Oh, my God.

我的天啊

This is so freeing.

真是太解脱了

I can finally say it.

我终于可以说出来了

You are so stupid!

你真是蠢爆了

Why does no one talk about how dumb she is?

怎么没人谈论她有多蠢呢

She's like the dumbest person on the planet!

她简直是这个星球上最愚蠢的人

50 years ago,

50年前

she would be sterilized for the good of evolution.

为了人类进化考虑她会被绝育的

‭I'm not so stupid that I couldn't get you

我也不算太蠢吧毕竟我成功地让你

to let me bone another guy in front of you

同意我当着你的面跟别的男人上床

and make you think it was for our marriage.

并让你坚信那是为了我们的婚姻

Get out!

滚出去

Out!

滚出

Uh, excuse you.

借过

Look who's here!

瞧瞧谁来了

Remember?

还记得吗

That talking baby movie?

那部会说话的宝宝的电影

Look Who's Here?

《瞧瞧谁来了》

Well, I'll tell you who's here.

我来告诉你们是谁来了

Tallulah.

塔卢拉

It's me, you turkeys.

是我哦你们这些没用的家伙

I'm ready, Vernon.

我准备好了弗南

I'm ready to start a new life in Méjico

我准备好去墨西哥开始新生活了

and find a woman who really loves me.

找到一个真正爱我的女人

What?

什么

Oh. Nah,

不

I hadn't met the baby when I said that.

我当时说这话的时候还没见过孩子

I love her so goddamn much, nerd.

我太爱她了呆子

Plus, I can't leave her with Bec.

再说我不能让她跟贝卡一起过

She will JonBenet her fo' sho',

她绝对会把女儿害死的

or leave her on a bench at the Marina del Rey Rosé Fest

或把她丢在玛丽安德尔湾玫瑰节的长椅上

or some shit.

或其他乱七八糟的事

You're really giving up those big naturals?

你真要放弃那对天然的大奶子吗

Tallulah.

塔卢拉

Uh, sorry, Paul.

抱歉保罗

You're not part of this family anymore.

你已经不属于这个大家庭了

You know, when I was in high school,

我念高中的时候

you wouldn't have existed to me.

你这种人在我眼中完全是不存在的

Now, we can just return to that natural state of things.

现在我们又可以回到那种自然状态了

Vernon?

弗南

Just go.

快走吧

Get out of here, nerd.

滚吧呆子

- But... - Go on.

-但是 -快走吧

Get!

拿着滚

Gretchen!

格雷琴

Found you again, dummy,

又找到你了笨蛋

just followed the trail of insulin needles.

通过追寻胰岛素注射针就能找到你

I pictured her so much taller and more muscular.

我想象中的她要比这高很多也更健壮

You told them about me?

你跟他们说了我吗

You're not allowed to talk about me.

你是不能谈论我的

I'm so glad you came.

我真高兴你来了

I Foursquared it, just hoping you'd see.

我故意发布定位信息希望你能看到

Oh, hey, hey.

对了

Do-- do that thing where you call me names.

快表演一下你骂我的样子

‭Ooh, yes, yes, yes.

对对对快来

Like...

比如

titty-sucking bitch?

舔奶子的贱人

Oh, I am going to miss that, Gretchen.

我一定会很怀念这个的格雷琴

Actually, I'm--

实际上我...

I'm leaving town.

我要离开这里了

My boyfriend got into the dramaturgy program at the University of Iowa.

我男朋友申请到了爱荷华大学的剧作理论课程

So, I feel like I need to support him in that.

我觉得我需要去支持他

He doesn't even have a car.

他连车都没有

He uses Justina's credit card when he buys her presents.

他给加丝蒂娜买礼物的时候刷的还是她的卡

Okay, shut up, you guys. He's on a path.

好了你们都闭嘴吧他在慢慢变好

You're choosing your boyfriend over your career?

你为了男朋友放弃了自己的事业吗

Oh, that's a terrible example for women.

那对女人而言真是个反面教材

And diabetics!

对糖尿病患者也是一样

She's amazing.

她简直太赞了

Can I have her?

能把她让给我吗

No! Look, we can still do Skype sessions, right?

不行我们还是可以视频聊天的

Iowa has got the Internet, I think.

我觉得爱荷华州应该有互联网

Okay.

好吧

I'm gonna show you my titties, though,

不过我会给你看我的奶子的

and then you're gonna try to suck on them through the screen.

然后你要试着隔着屏幕给我舔奶

Oh, my God.

天啊

When you first came to me, you were out of touch,

你最初来找我的时候简直是最特立独行的奇葩

even with your most rudimentary behavioral patterns,

尽管你有着最发育不全的行为模式

but you have done the work

但是你付出了那些努力

and you have grown so much.

你成长了很多

And I'm proud of you.

我为你骄傲

Bitch.

贱人

Bitch to you, too, Gretchen.

你也是个贱人格雷琴

你会成功的!

拿下艾美奖! 金球奖也不是问题!

你就是个明星!

你很逗!

So, Doug Benson offered me a full-time staff job

道格·本森向我提供了一份全职工作

and I wasn't gonna take it

我本来不想接受的

because I didn't want you to feel bad,

因为我不希望你难过

but instead, I decided to keep it,

不过我最终还是决定去干这份工作

because I'm becoming a real person,

因为我正在变成一个真实的人

which in turn,

顺理成章地

will make me a better partner for you.

我也会成为你更好的伴侣

Isn't that great?

那很好不是吗

Uh, slow down.

慢着

He offered you a staff job

他给你提供一份工作

and you were gonna turn it down because of me?

你原本打算为了我而放弃的吗

‭But I didn't.

但我没那么做

And now, I can support you while things are tough.

现在在艰难的日子里我可以支撑你了

What?

怎么了

I'm not gonna make it.

我是不会成功的

What?

什么

Why would you say that?

你为什么这么说

Because I'm not, Edgar.

因为我就是不行埃德加

I'm not, okay? Face it.

我就是不行面对现实吧

And the mere fact that you were even thinking of turning down

你因为同情我而打算放弃

this amazing gig because you feel sorry for me

这份出色的工作光是这件事

means you don't love me.

就说明你并不爱我

You pity me. That's not love.

你是同情我那不是爱

I don't want that.

我不想要那样

I'm moving back to Jacksonville, Edgar.

我要搬回杰克逊维尔了埃德加

N-No. What?

不要什么

No, uh, then-then--

不那么...

then I'll come with you.

我也跟你一起去

I-I love Texas--

我爱德州

the barbecues, rodeos, South By.

烤肉马术大赛西南偏南艺术节

No, Florida.

不那地方在佛州

Oh, God.

天啊

Oh, no. That's way worse.

不好那要糟糕得多

Look, I don't want you to martyr yourself for me.

听着我不希望你为了我而牺牲自己

I want you to stay here and have your dream.

我希望你留在这里实现你的梦想

But what about your dream?

那你的梦想怎么办

Not everybody gets their dream.

并非每个人都能实现自己的梦想

Hey, if you know anybody

对了如果你认识谁

who wants to take over my lease, will you let me know?

想续租我的房子能告诉我一声吗

Thank you

谢谢你

for being a wonderful boyfriend.

是个这么出色的男友

‭I'm sorry.

对不起

I failed.

我失败了

- You've had enough? - Who's hungry?

-你喝饱了吗 -谁饿了啊

- You've had enough? - Who's hungry?

-你喝饱了吗 -谁饿了啊

No? ‭Who's hungry?

没有吗谁饿了啊

Not hungry? ‭

不饿吗

So, um...

话说...

is that formula only for babies,

那个配方牛奶只有宝宝能喝

or can hungry big boys get in on it, too?

还是饥饿的大男孩也能喝

Don't you listen to him.

你可千万别听他的

Can I talk to you for a minute?

我能跟你谈谈吗

‭You got her?

你抱住了吗

- I got her. - ‭Careful, careful.

-我抱稳了 -当心当心

Hi, Tallulah.

嗨塔卢拉

- Who wants the blues? - No, no.

-谁想听蓝调啊 -不不要

No one wants that.

没人想听

♪ Weird poop in my diaper ♪

♪尿片里有着奇形怪状的屎♪

Just change her, for God's sakes.

快去给她换尿布吧天啊

♪Spit-up on my chin.♪

♪下巴上挂着呕吐物♪

Can I live at your house again?

我能再去你家住一段时间吗

You mean, until a week from now when you change your mind

你是说一周后你就会改变主意

and decide to move back in with SpongeNerd SquareFace?

又搬回去跟无敌大饼脸超级大呆子一起住吗

It's over for real this time.

这次是真正结束了

He called me stupid.

他竟然骂我蠢

Can you believe that?

你敢相信吗

What? No!

什么不是吗

You? What...?

你还蠢不是吧...

I know. ‭

我也觉得

Well, I just don't know

我只是不确定

if we have the ability to house another baby,

我们是否有足够的能力再收留一个婴儿

you know, even if it is being raised

哪怕它是由一个

by a financially disadvantaged single mother.

经济状况差劲的单亲妈妈抚养长大

There's no baby.

没有什么婴儿

It'll just be me.

只有我一个人

Well, you would have to be Tallulah's full-time nanny.

那你必须当塔卢拉的全职保姆了

Josefina quit because Vernon kept shooting Nerf darts at her

何塞菲娜辞职了因为弗南总趁她打扫卫生时

while she vacuums. ‭

向她发射儿童飞镖

Yes! My kid just dropped a major duke!

好棒我家孩子刚刚拉了一大泡屎

Don't worry, Beck, I got this.

别担心贝卡我可以的

‭I have to admit,

我必须承认

part of me is jealous.

我有一点点嫉妒

It's gonna be at least 18 years

至少要18年后

before I can divorce Vernon,

我才能跟弗南离婚

cut my hair off,

剪掉我的头发

get a golden retriever,

养一只金毛猎犬

wear chunky knits,

穿厚重的毛衣

and just redo my kitchen.

重新装修我的厨房

Over and over, forever.

一遍又一遍永远进行下去

If I were you, I would revel in my freedom.

如果我是你我一定会在自由里狂欢

- Yeah. ‭- Babe,

-没错 -宝贝

- can I get a little help up here? - Freedom.

-能来帮帮我吗 -自由

Babe, baby, babe, help me! Babe, help me!

宝贝宝贝帮帮我快帮帮我

You know, so I realized I can't live with Becca.

我意识到我不能跟贝卡一起住

I need freedom.

我需要自由

Hey, are you sure she's gone?

你确定她已经走了吗

I'm sorry. ‭

我很遗憾

I liked that rando.

我还挺喜欢那姑娘的

I know.

我知道

This is so weird.

这真的好怪啊

I'm still not even sure what exactly happened.

我还是不太确定究竟发生了什么

I never understand anything that happens to me.

我从来就没搞明白过发生在我身上的任何事

Are you okay?

你没事吧

I think, once she said it,

我觉得一旦她说了出来

part of me wanted her to go.

我内心确实有一丝希望她离开

She was kind of bumming me out.

她让我很烦恼和失望

How horrible is that of me?

我真是个糟糕的人对吧

I mean, it's not supposed to work like that.

不该是那样的啊

Right?

对吧

And then it does.

但确实就是这样

Are you gonna be okay here?

你一个人住这里真的可以吗

Even though I'm alone and broke

尽管我孤身一人经济困难

and live in the poorest apartment in the world...

住在全世界最穷酸的公寓里

- I feel good. ‭- Good!

-我还是感觉很愉快 -好极了

I'll be by in the morning to help you...

我明早过来帮你...

- spruce this place up. - Thanks, Edgar.

-把这地方收拾整理一下 -谢了埃德加

I'll buy you a pizza...

我请你吃披萨

Oh, wait. I just remembered

等等我刚突然想起来

I don't have any money. Can you bring me a pizza?

我其实没有钱你能给我买份披萨吗

No.

不行

Good boy.

好样的

Jimmy!

吉米

Jimmy!

吉米

Oh, my God,

天啊

it's so scary!

好吓人

Jimmy!

吉米

What does it mean?

这是什么意思啊

Jimmy...

吉米

I want to touch it. Can I touch it?

我好想摸摸我能摸摸吗

Oh, Jimmy, I'm gonna touch it.

吉米我要摸了

Jimmy!

吉米

Jimmy!

吉米

What are you doing?

你在干什么呢

The world is absolutely lousy with people,

这个世界充满了人

and I hate them all.

我憎恶所有的人

I hate everyone...

我讨厌每一个人

but you.

除了你

Yeah. I hate everyone else, too.

没错我也讨厌其他所有人

Now, let's look for clues.

我们开始寻找线索吧

You did something really horrible for us.

你做了对我们而言非常可怕的事

You went to therapy, and for me you did this.

你去接受心理治疗了而且你是为了我这么做的

And thus, you deserve as grand a gesture in return.

因此你值得获得一个大大的回报

And since I am 100% psychologically sound

鉴于我的心理是100%健全的

and do not need therapy of any kind...

也绝不需要任何的心理治疗

Gretchen,

格雷琴

extraordinary, confounding Gretchen,

超凡绝伦复杂多变的格雷琴

she who emits more energy than a dying galaxy,

比一个即将消亡的星系能释放出更多的能量

despite not washing her legs,

尽管不洗腿

together we transcend the...

我们一起超越了...

mundanity down there.

下面那些世俗的人类

Separate, it shall eventually consume us

如果分开那只会吞噬我们的力量

and turn us as mundane as them,

把我们变成跟他们一样世俗的存在

and to allow that to happen simply because we were scared

就因为我们害怕就允许那种情况发生

would be a criminal act.

简直是在犯罪

Wait, but the murder...?

等等那个谋杀案...

I made it up.

是我编造的

The article? The Twitter account?

那篇报道那个推特账号

Me.

是我伪造的

The D.U.I. checkpoint?

那个酒驾检查点

Oh, no. That was real. No, we were way lucky on that one.

不那个是真的不过算我们走运躲过去了

Jimmy,

吉米

yeah, n... Wait.

我愿意等等

You haven't actually asked yet. I am not doing that again.

你还没正式问我呢我可不要又像上次那样

Will you marry me?

你愿意嫁给我吗

Yes!

我愿意

You made a murder for me!

你为我制造了一个谋杀案

Hey, uh, you ever

对了你有没有过

boned down during the Hollywood Bowl fireworks?

在好莱坞露天剧场焰火表演下做爱的经历

I mean, of course.

当然有啦

Yeah, me, too, but not as an engaged person.

我也有过但是可没以订婚人士的身份干过

I'll get us a hoodie from the car to lie on.

我去拿个引擎盖来躺在上面干

Hurry back.

快点回来哦

This fits, you know?

这很合适你知道吗

You lost your dad, but...

你失去了你爸但是...

you gained me.

你得到了我

We're a family.

我们是一家人了

That's pretty cool, right?

那挺酷的对吧

We're no longer just

我们不再是

whatever we were.

曾经的我们了

We're no longer... just us.

我们也不再是单独的自我了

We're a family now.

我们现在是一家人了

我爱上的人是奇葩 第三季 You're the Worst Season 3 第13集: 不再让你孤单 No Longer Just Us

台词

我爱上的人是奇葩第三季 You're the Worst Season 3 第13集: 不再让你孤单 No Longer Just Us