我爱上的人是奇葩第三季双语台词对白剧本

So you remember Jimmy, right?

你还记得吉米吧

‭Oh, my God. Gretchen.

我的天格雷琴

Tough titties, it's a free country.

不如意事多着呢这是个自由国度

Anyway, I have to have this really sucky conversation with him

总之我得和他进行一场非常糟糕的谈话

and I don't want to at all.

但我根本不想进行

Your appointment isn't until next week.

你的预约是在下周

You cannot just show up places.

你不能就这么出现

Well then, stop Foursquaring yourself every time you leave the house,

那就别每次出门时都发自己的地点定位

like the Mayor of Thirsty Town.

跟"饥渴镇"的求操镇长一样

Also, stop using Foursquare like the Mayor of 2011.

还有别跟"过时镇长"一样用"足迹"定位发布

Okay. So you need something from Jimmy.

好吧你需要从吉米那里得到某种东西

Yeah. I need his dad to have seen a cardiologist!

是啊我需要他爸生前去看心脏科医生

snap.

真犀利

He died?

他死了吗

- I'm so sorry. When? - ‭Okay.

-我很遗憾什么时候 -好吧

So here's the part where you feel like total dog shit.

接下来这部分一定会让你愧疚无比

Remember you made me open my mail?

你还记得你让我拆邮件吧

Well I did. And boom.

我就拆了然后被炸一脸

There's his dad's obit.

我看到他爸的讣告

And I'm like, "Well, shit! How am I supposed to tell him?"

我就想 "妈的我要怎么告诉他啊"

So how am I supposed to tell him?

所以我要怎么告诉他

- You haven't told him? ‭- No! I couldn't!

-你还没告诉他吗 -没有我没法儿说

He was so stoked about selling his book.

他刚卖出新书简直高兴得不得了

And then I got busy and forgot for a couple days.

我也忙就忘了几天

But then, I was gonna tell him,

但我刚要告诉他

and I got preoccupied by this iguana on Instagram

又被这只鬣蜥蜴戳中笑点

who is just so over it.

一脸冷漠真是太搞笑了

It's gonna suck so bad.

到时候一定会特别糟糕

I get it. It's tough.

我懂的这很艰难

The idea of seeing Jimmy in pain...

想着看到吉米陷入痛苦...

Jimmy? No, this is gonna suck for me.

吉米不到时候对我而言会变得糟糕

We've been having hella fun lately.

我们最近特别愉快

Boning like crazy.

一有机会就打炮

I tricked him into giving me backrubs,

我骗他给我挠背

saying that it made me horny.

说那会让我性致盎然

Jokes on you, dummy. I'm horny already.

被骗了吧小傻瓜我本来就性致盎然了

Here's an idea: what if I just never tell him?

我有个想法要是我永远都不告诉他怎么样

I-I don't like to tell my patients what to do,

我不喜欢对我的病人指手画脚

but Jesus Christ, you have to tell Jimmy his father died.

可是老天爷你得告诉吉米他父亲的死讯

What if he cries,

要是他哭了怎么办

and I see the sad little boy inside?

让我看到他内心深处伤心的小男孩

I don't want to tell him.

我不想告诉他

I know. And I've met Jimmy--

我知道我见过吉米

that sounds disgusting-- but you have to.

那听上去好恶心但你必须告诉他

Fine.

好吧

I suppose you want me to pay you now.

我想我现在该付你钱了

Ugh, you owe me a five spot.

你欠我5块

翻译大叔酱 TVyoung@TVyoung

■

翻译洗七里阿夏泽生

时间轴阿包后期加森

校对 Ethan-泽生总监 Ethan-泽生

我爱上的人是奇葩第三季第三集

Right. Remember,

好记住

the look we're going for is jocund but...

我们想要的形象是欢乐而又...

profoundly tormented. Okay?

饱经沧桑的懂吗

Uh, what's going on, Jimbo?

在做什么呢吉宝

Jacket photo. It's a bit early.

拍宣传照虽然有点早了

But I'm planning on going full D'Onofrio

但我计划着只要预付款打过来了

once the advance money comes in.

各方面宣传工作都要开展起来

Can you take a little break?

你能稍微休息下吗

God, no, woman!

老天不行娘们儿

There's too much to do,

有这么多事要做

now that the starting gun on the Grand Prix has sounded,

大奖赛的枪声已经响起

the instant that I take my foot off the proverbial gas to celebrate,

我将脚从那油门上松开跑去庆祝的一瞬间

shall materialize five other writers in my side mirror

就有5个作家在高速公路上等着

just ready to pass me on the Autobahn

从旁边超了我

that is the publishing industry...

出版业就是这么竞争残酷

to clumsily mix European race car metaphors.

虽然拿欧洲车赛来作比不是很恰当

As a veteran writer girlfriend now,

作为一名资深作家女友

you know that the work is never-ending.

你该明白这份工作永无止境

But you spent the last few months drinking

但过去几个月你都在喝酒

and jerking it to the Lane Bryant shoe catalog.

对着女鞋产品目录打飞机

If I have to explain this one more time:

我再解释一遍

it's all writing.

那都是在创作

Um, I'll be quick. ‭

我速战速决

- Listen, Jimmy... - No, I'm sorry.

-听着吉米 -不不好意思

Look, this is gonna be a very long, arduous--

听着在我身边这会是一场冗长艰巨的旅程

yet certainly rewarding-- journey for you, at my side,

但你在我身边一定会收获颇丰

so before the madness begins,

所以在一切的疯狂开始之前

as a pre-ward, I want to take you on a restorative trip.

我想先带你来一场治愈旅行

Like a cruise?

游轮航行吗

Can we go on a cruise?

我们能去享受游轮航行吗

That's my dream vacation!

那简直是我的梦想假日

My parents always thought it was tacky.

我爹妈总觉得这样太没教养

Okay. Well, if your idea of paradise

好吧如果你梦想中的天堂

is succumbing to Norovirus on a floating red state,

就是在漂浮着的人山上死于诺如病毒

then sure!

那就去吧

There-there is a water slide and-and a musical revue

有水滑梯和音乐剧

and if the grown-ups are busy gambling,

如果大人们忙着赌博

you hang out with the other kids and just color!

我们就跟其他孩子一起玩到处画画

Okay, I need to get back to my shoot.

好吧我得继续拍照片了

I have a liquid brunch with my editor,

我和我的编辑要去喝早午餐酒

so we can plan marketing strategies.

制定一下营销策略

Sounds fun!

听上去真好玩

Gretchen.

格雷琴

Every mimosa is a chore.

每滴酒都是一项任务

Okay? Every sip is a brick in a literary wall

懂吗我每喝一口酒都是在给文学之墙的

- that I'm painting... - ‭Got it. Yay! Cruise!

-一块砖上漆 -懂了真棒游轮

Okay, back to work. Props.

行了继续工作吧道具拿过来

Ooh, you hungry?

你饿吗

I could eat.

我还能吃

- May I help you? - We're with the network.

-有什么需要帮助吗 -我们是电视网的

So, how's your gimpy husband?

你的伤残老公怎么样了

Poor Paul. He's off the couch,

可怜的保罗他下沙发了

but his wound keeps getting reinfected somehow.

但他的伤口貌似一直在感染

I poked around there with my fingers,

我用指头来回戳了

and couldn't find anything.

没有发现什么

I feel guilty because of how much he suffered.

我为他的痛苦感到内疚

And because you stabbed him on purpose.

以及你故意捅了他

I didn't want to kill him, I just snapped.

我没想杀他我只是冲动了一下

I knew it!

我就知道

Lindser! Oh, my God,

琳子我的天

I thought I was scared of you

你那次在提华纳冲警察大吼

that time you yelled at that cop in Tijuana.

就让我十分害怕了

You should be scared.

你理应害怕

And it was so easy.

而且真的超容易

I was just like...

我就好像...

Poking some cheese.

戳奶酪一样

Poking some cheese?

戳奶酪

It's spooky.

很诡异

Afterwards, I kept telling myself I didn't do it,

过后我一直告诉自己不是我干的

until I actually believed it.

直到我自己都信了

Like how Oprah can eat bread now.

就像欧普拉能吃面包了一样

You don't love Paul.

你不爱保罗

That was true for Old Lindsay.

那对"旧琳赛"来说没错

New Lindsay can put any thought in her brain.

"新琳赛"可以装载任何思想

Like that upside down movie with Juno and the dreidel

像那部天旋地转的电影有"朱诺"还有陀螺

热门电影《盗梦空间》

and Tom Hardy with the tight pants. ‭

以及穿紧身裤的汤姆·哈迪

If I can incept myself I didn't stab Paul,

假如我能植入"我没捅保罗"的思想

maybe I can incept myself into loving him.

没准我也能植入"我爱他"的思想

How are things with the Jim-dogs?

你和吉米那家伙怎么样了

Oh, suck-balls. His pops croaked.

一塌糊涂他老爸翘辫子了

- So what's the probs? - I haven't told him yet.

-所以问题在哪 -我还没告诉他

And now my therapist is making me.

现在我的心理医生强迫我告诉他

You can't tell him, Gretch!

你不能告诉他格雷琴

The second those words come out of your mouth,

你说出这些话的一瞬间

you are no longer Jimmy's fun sex hole.

你就不再是吉米的有趣性伙伴了

You're the guys at the beginning of Saving Private Ryan

你就变成了《拯救大兵瑞恩》开头那个

who make the moms fall down.

给士兵家属报丧的信使了

You're right!

你说的太对了

That titty-sucking bitch is trying to

那吸奶的贱人这是想

straight "Lemonade" My relationship.

直接榨干我的感情

- What do I do? - ‭Get some other sucker to tell him.

-我该怎么办 -找个"替死鬼"告诉他

Colby! Travis!

科尔比崔维斯

You two know the policy on roughhousing.

你们知道不许打闹的规定

I don't care if you are best friends.

我不管你们是不是最好的朋友

Ten more minutes and I'm coming in there!

再闹十分钟我就进去了

As I was saying, we've got a killer special.

我刚刚说了我们这里有吐血特惠

$49 for three yoga sessions, or three Pilates sessions.

49美元三次瑜伽课或三次普拉提课

We also have a cutting-edge new lineup

我们还有最新潮系列的

of the hottest new hybrid workouts.

时下最火爆的混合健身

Piloxing: Pilates and boxing,

"普拉击" 普拉提加搏击

yogitsu: yoga and jujitsu,

"瑜柔术" 瑜伽加柔术

Spowing: spinning and rowing,

"动感艇" 动感单车加划艇

Zustified: that's Zumba while you binge-watch Justified,

"火线桑巴" 就是边恶补《火线警探》边跳桑巴

- it's actually not really... Edgar, shut up.

-那个其实不是很... -埃德加闭嘴

We need to tell you a secret.

我们要告诉你个秘密

No, no, no, no, no. I-I don't want any secrets.

不要不要我不想听秘密

You love secrets.

你喜欢秘密

Secrets are your favorite thing.

秘密是你的最爱

Oh, this is a really bad time.

现在时机真的不适合

Okay? I've been stuck with processing some events,

好吗我一直难以消化一些事情

like the time we got pinned down outside of Tikrit,

就像那次我们在提克里特外被围剿

and we had to improvise body armor with tank shrapnel.

我们必须临时用坦克弹片做防弹衣

That's not so bad.

那还不算太糟

Or like, the time I was so thirsty I shot a camel.

或者那次我太渴了就射杀了一只骆驼

Because you thought there was water in the humps?

因为你以为驼峰里有水

Yeah. Turns out they don't work like that.

是的结果并不是这么回事

Anyway, seriously,

总之说真的

I-I don't have any room in my heads for any more dark...

我脑袋里装不下更多黑暗的...

Jimmy's dad died, and he doesn't know.

吉米的爸爸死了他还不知道

Jimmy's dad what?

吉米的爸爸怎么了

Oh, God.

天啊

Poor Ronny, poor Jimmy, poor camel.

可怜的罗尼可怜的吉米可怜的骆驼

Poor Bing Bong.

可怜的"冰棒"

电影《头脑特工队》里的角色

Everything's bad, you guys.

一切都很糟糕二位

Everything's really, really bad.

真的很糟糕大事不妙

So you'll tell him, yeah? Thanks.

所以你会告诉他的吧谢了

No, no, no way! I...

不不可能我...

I told enough people that someone that they love died.

我已经告诉太多人他们最爱的人都死了

I have an idea. When my parents got divorced,

我有主意了我父母离婚的时候

they told us at Benihana's

是在日式铁板烧告诉我们的

so we wouldn't cause a scene.

那样就不会闹得太难堪

The chef put a shrimp in his hat.

那个厨师在帽子里放了只虾呢

- How'd that work? - He just put a shrimp in his hat.

-怎么办到的 -他就把虾放帽子里了

No, I mean, telling you in public.

不我是说在公众场合说出来

It totally made us not freak out as much.

那确实没让我们太崩溃

Except later, I drank my mom's mai tai and climbed on the table

除了之后我喝了我妈的迈泰酒然后爬到桌上

'cause I forgot it was a grill.

我忘了那是烧烤板了

That's why I don't have footprints.

所以我没有脚掌纹

Okay.

好吧

So, maybe I invite a bunch of people over,

也许我可以邀请一大堆人来

and then everyone tells him together.

然后大家一起告诉他

And then he associates the sadness with you jerks,

然后他会认为悲伤是你们带给他的

and not with me.

而不是我

That suddenly sounds bad for us.

那似乎是让我们去做恶人

I got to go, you guys. I'm late teaching Treadsparent.

我得走了伙计们要来不及教"跑步家庭"了

电视剧《透明家庭》

It's running on a treadmill while you watch...

也就是边练跑步机边看...

We get it.

我们懂

These hand-crutches were all Lindsay could find at the medical supply.

琳赛在医疗用品店只能找到这副手拐了

I don't like that place.

我不喜欢那地方

So many weird toilets.

有好多奇怪的马桶

I love sneaking an extra dessert, don't you?

我喜欢偷偷多吃一份甜食你呢

One's for me, one's for my baby.

一份给我一份给我的宝宝

I'm not giving my dessert to your baby.

我才不要把我的甜点让给你的宝宝

Oh, right, you meant my baby.

对了你是指我的宝宝

That's right, I'm still pregnant.

没错我还怀着宝宝呢

Check it out.

看看这个

Looks like a normal vest with a ton of pockets, right?

看起来只是件口袋很多的普通背心对不对

Wrong.

错了

Harmonica vest.

其实是口琴背心

Ever since I Venmo'd a year's salary to some chick in the Ukraine,

自从我把一年薪水都转账给了一个乌克兰妞

I can only have hobbies that cost less than $25.

我花在个人爱好上的钱不能超过25块

Hell yeah!

赞爆了

Hey, everybody.

大家好啊

Uh, thank you so much for coming to

非常感谢你们来参加

Jimmy's surprise/congratulations-you-sold-the-book party.

吉米的惊喜即"恭喜你书卖出去了"派对

Um, small change of plans, though.

不过计划略有变动

Jimmy's dad passed away.

吉米的父亲过世了

What a major tradge,

实在太悲剧了

but happens every day on my operating table.

但每天都会发生在我的手术台上

Someone dies every day on your operating table?

每天都有人死在你的手术台上吗

Not literally every day, dummy.

不是实指的每天笨笨

On average.

是平均值

Our condolences, Gretchen.

节哀顺变格雷琴

We should let you two grieve in private.

你们两个正在悲痛中我们不该继续打扰

Oh, no, no, no, no! Stay.

不不不留下来

Um, in fact --

其实

Wait, crazy idea.

等等我有个疯狂的想法

Um, why don't we tell him together?

我们为什么不一起告诉他呢

He doesn't know?

他还不知道吗

Well, it happened in England.

他爸死在英格兰

And there's a time difference, so --

和我们这边有时差所以

Yeah, uh, so, when he comes home,

好了等他到家了

I'll give the signal, you guys drop the bomb,

我一发信号你们就宣布噩耗

and boom -- it's your fault.

那样就是你们大家的错了

Thanks so much for doing this.

非常感谢大家参与

Eat cheese, have fun.

吃点奶酪玩开心点

Can you imagine?

你能想象吗

He was almost my father-in-law.

他差点就成我公公了

Of course, I'm much closer to the whole thing

当然了我对这件事的感触比你们深多了

now that I'm going to have a daughter.

因为我就快生下一个女儿了

That's right.

没错

We're having a girl.

我们的宝宝是个女孩

Isn't that amazing?

是不是很棒

Can't you just die how cute we're gonna be together?

将来我们母女相依简直萌死人对吧

Of course, it's such a shame that our gender-reveal party

当然我们宣布宝宝性别的派对

was spoiled when those North Korean hackers stole Vernon's identity.

被那些盗用弗南身份的朝鲜黑客给毁了是很可惜

Becca, we all know Vernon was a money-slave.

贝卡我们都知道弗南是个钱奴

What? No, no, no.

什么不是的

No, that was just a story he told,

不是的那个故事是他编的

because he was embarrassed.

因为他觉得很丢人

Bad passwords.

密码设得太简单了

Poor Jimmy.

可怜的吉米

I lost my dad, too.

我也失去了我父亲

- Your dad died? ‭- No.

-你爸也死了吗 -不是

I just lost him.

我只是把他弄丢了

Last week, we were at the Beverly Center

上周我们在比佛利购物中心

and he told me to go look at puppies while he went to Sunglass Hut.

他去买墨镜的时候叫我去看小狗

I think we both knew what was about to happen.

我想我们都预见到了结局

Oh, no.

不是吧

‭So, I've been living alone, sleeping in his bed.

所以我自那以后都是独居睡在他床上

I'm not ready to be an adult.

我还没准备好做一个成年人

Contemplate the sundry ways a society handles its elderly and infirm.

思考一下不同社会对待老弱病残的不同方式

For instance, the noble Eskimo

比如崇高的爱斯基摩人老后

sets himself adrift on an iceberg.

会让自己在冰山上漂流远去

He's so smart.

他真聪明

You love this smart, smart man.

你爱这个无比聪明的男人

You love his jiggly body and square face.

你爱他胖得肥油乱晃的身体和方脸

You really do.

你是真的爱他

He's here!

他到了

Get ready.

都准备好

Gretchen, that brunch was a nightmare.

格雷琴那顿早午餐是场噩梦

The publisher just kept telling me,

出版商只是不停对我说

"When I write the book..."

"当我写书的时候..."

Plus the "Bottomless" in "Bottomless mimosas"

另外如果服务生消失十分钟不见人

means nothing if the waitress disappears

那"无限续杯含羞草酒"的"无限续杯"

for ten minutes at a time.

根本毫无意义

Jimmy, look who's here.

吉米看看谁来了

You invited people over.

你请了客人来

Is it Oscar night?

今天是奥斯卡之夜吗

Well, keep it down.

你们声音别太大

I, of course, must handcuff myself to my laptop

当然了我得把自己铐在笔记本电脑上

until my book is written.

直到我把书写完

Good-bye, all. See you in the spring.

各位再见春天再见

Wait, Jimmy, uh...

等等吉米

Just stay a moment.

稍等一下

Um, everyone's here for you.

大家都是为你而来的

You're here to celebrate my book sale.

你们是来庆祝我的书卖出去了

Well, it would be positively unsporting of me

如果不让你们沉浸在我的成功中享乐一下

to deny you the pleasure of basking in my success,

那我真是太没有道德和风度了

even though nothing good happened to you.

尽管你们自己毫无作为

I never understood that impulse, really.

我从来都不能理解那种冲动

Though we do tend to gather around a fire.

不过人会向耀眼的火光聚集也是天性

No, Jimmy, you don't understand, um --

不吉米你误会了

- Hey, everybody, could we, um --? - And, Gretchen,

-大家我们能不能... -格雷琴

my partner in crime,

我的犯罪搭档

the diminutive, mole-lipped

娇小的嘴唇上长痣的妹子

Lillian Hellman to my

若我是达希尔·哈米特

Dashiell Hammett.

你就是莉莉安·海尔曼

You have been so supportive.

你一直以来是如此支持我

No problem. Uh, the people would like to tell you something.

没问题大家有话想对你说

So, I was gonna surprise you.

我本想给你个惊喜

But I did some research.

但我做了些调查

And I think I found the perfect cruise for you.

我想我找到了最适合你的巡游项目

It's called "The Famous Pets of Instagram Cruise."

名字叫做"Ins网红宠物巡游"

What?!

什么

Sombrero Iguana?

宽边帽鬣蜥

Bus Stop Goat!

车站羊

Cookie Pig!

饼干猪

They're all gonna be there for me?

我都能亲眼见到吗

When are we delivering the package, you know?

我们什么时候甩包袱

- The top secret intel? ‭- Shut up.

-那个绝密信息 -闭嘴

After he buys the tickets.

等他买完票再说

This is the greatest day of my life!

这是我这辈子最美好的一天

I am gonna meet Grumpy Cat!

我要面见不爽猫啦

I sold my book!

我的书卖出去了

We're gonna live forever!

我们会永远在一起

Lindsay, I got champagne in my wound.

琳赛香槟洒到我的伤口上了

The bubbles, they sting!

那些泡泡好刺痛

You have to flush it for me.

你快帮我冲掉

Okay, Bear, let's go to the sink.

好吧宝贝我们去水池那儿

It hurts so bad!

好痛啊

Does it smell funny?

有没有怪味

If it smells like eggs,

要是闻起来像臭鸡蛋

you have to take me back to urgent care!

你还得再送我去急诊室

You love him. You love him.

你爱他你爱他

Want to get stupid?

想傻玩一下吗

How can you party like this when you know someone died?

知道有人去世了你怎么还能玩得这么开心

I work at a hospital, dude.

我在医院工作老兄

Just 'cause a busload of dead kids rolled up,

只是死了一车孩子

doesn't make it not Margarita Monday.

并不意味着就不能享受"玛格丽特周一"了

Congratulations, Jimmy.

恭喜哦吉米

It is really great to see you so happy.

见到你这么高兴我真开心

You have always been a success in my book.

你在我眼里一直都很成功

Okay.

好了

I picked out an ocean suite

我选了间海景房

with a porthole so we can smoke

带舷窗的这样我们就能抽烟了

and I added a meet and greet with Sarcastic Llama.

还加了场"嘲讽驼"的见面会

They take Apple Pay.

他们支持苹果支付

You just have to put your thumb on the thing.

你只需要按下大拇指就行了

They don't want me to succeed.

他们不希望我成功

Oh, no, Jimmy, before you turn,

别啊吉米在你翻脸之前

can you just put your thumb on the thing?!

能不能先按下大拇指啊

- Look at them. - ‭No!

-瞧他们这幅样子 -别啊

Sirens singing, "Come play with us."

高唱着 "来和我们一起玩吧"

But really they just want me to pilot my literary schooner

但他们真实的想法却是盼望我文学的风帆

into the rocks of do-nothingness.

撞上一事无成的岩石

I invited them!

是我请他们来的

Exactly!

没错

If you all didn't want me to fail,

如果你们不希望我失败的话

then you would've listened when I said I have to write!

那就该听到我刚才说了我得去写作

They're desperately afraid that I will shine so brightly,

他们怕得要命生怕我会大放异彩

it will illuminate how dim their lives are by comparison.

这样一比较就显出他们的人生是如此暗淡

Congratulations, Jimmy.

祝贺你吉米

Unaccepted. This is attempted criminal derailment.

不接受这简直是试图进行的犯罪脱轨行为

I don't know what you're saying, but it sounds jerky.

我听不懂你在说什么但听起来很混蛋

Yeah, and I'll be sure to return the favor and sabotage

没错作为报复我会搞砸

your eventual attempt to do something useful with your life

你为了实现人生意义的最后一搏

like finish your GED

比如完成高中文凭考试

or dance in your adult tap recital.

或是跳你那成人踢踏舞

It's Afro-funk fusion.

那是非洲放克融合爵士乐

Listen here, buster.

你给我听好了混蛋

Lindsay is my bride,

琳赛是我的新娘

she's pregnant with my offspring,

她正孕育着我的后代

and she deserves respect!

她理应受到尊重

You love him.

你爱他

It worked.

真的有用呢

Apologize.

道歉

I will do you one better.

我给你来个更带劲的

I'm gonna go downstairs and get my heckle file.

我这会儿下楼去拿黑话本

And after I put you all in your place,

让你们都看清楚自己有几斤几两

once and for all,

彻底了断

I'll be free to get to work,

然后我就能去工作了

sans distractions.

全无干扰

- Yes. - Okay, everybody.

-好棒 -好了各位

Clock is ticking. Let's rip off the Band-Aid.

时间已经不多了撕下创可贴吧

We're going home. Vernon?

我们得回家了弗南

But I want to get heckled.

可我想听黑话啊

Fine, you can Uber home.

行吧你可以叫优步回家

But only the cheap carpool one.

但只许叫廉价拼车

I can't wait to see him cry.

我已经迫不及待要看他哭了

Oh, no, me Da.

哦不我爸

Go tell him, Gretchen!

快去告诉他格雷琴

No, Edgar's gonna do it.

不由埃德加去告诉他

Remember?

还记得吗

I-I can't.

我不行

Just do it!

快去啊

I'm dealing with some major shit.

我正在面对内心的巨大痛苦

Delivering tragic news is a kind of service.

传达噩耗是一种奉献

To sacrifice your own comfort

牺牲你自己的舒适

so they can have the gift of truth?

让他人获得真相的馈赠

That is true nobility.

那是种真正的崇高

Like when I was born dead,

就好比我出生时没有生命迹象

I vividly remember the pain in the doctor's voice

我清晰地记得医生话音里的痛苦

when he told my parents,

他这么告诉我父母

"I have good news and I have bad news.

"我有个好消息和坏消息要告诉你们

"The good news--

好消息是

"It's a boy and he's hella hung.

是个男孩他有个巨大的鸡鸡

Bad news-- dude's dead."

坏消息是他是死婴"

You're right.

你说得对

Jimmy deserves to know the truth.

吉米应该知道真相

Thank you. You're a hero.

谢谢你是个英雄

Now, get down there.

赶紧去吧

Ooh, and remind him about the cruise afterwards.

记得说完之后跟他提一下巡游的事

Oh, no, wait.

不等等

Maybe it's too early.

或许马上就说太快了

Yeah, hold it.

没错先别说

Go!

去吧

分类：轮滑鞋玩家害羞的人标清电视

More like dim...

更像是黯淡的...

Hey, Jimmy.

嘿吉米

I'm afraid some of these heckles are a bit out of date.

恐怕有些黑话太过时了

"Paul, nice It's Pat cosplay.

"保罗你模仿挺像的嘛"[电影]

"Edgar, I liked you better when you writing

"埃德加我更喜欢你编剧

"and starring in the hit musical In the Heights.

并主演热门音乐剧《身在高地》里的样子"

"Becca, "Heaven must be missing an angel,

"贝卡天堂里一定少了一只天使

"Because an angel saw your stupid face and blew its brains out."

因为有个天使看到你的傻逼脸爆头而亡"

That one's evergreen.

那一条永不过时

Uh, so you know how, uh, people come into your lives

你明白有些人进入到你的生命中

and, and they touch you?

然后触动你[触摸]

Is this about you being molested?

你是在说你被性侵了吗

Every neighborhood had a handsy fishmonger.

每片住宅区都有个喜欢动手动脚的鱼贩

No, Jimmy,

不吉米

It's about your father.

事关你父亲

Has Gretchen been infecting you with her therapy?

格雷琴接受心理治疗难道也传染给你了吗

See, unlike Gretchen, my father is a non-entity in my life.

和格雷琴不同的是我父亲并不存在于我的生命中

If this is about anything,

如果非要说是因为什么

it's about my need to disprove the notion

那就是我对"本质上我就是坨屎"

that at the core I'm just shit,

这种观念进行反驳的需求

which all started when I was a kid and--

一切都始于我的童年时期...

Oh, my God.

天啊

This is about my father.

的确是因为我父亲

- Yeah, okay, see-- - No wonder I can't take

-没错是这样的 -难怪我没办法

a moment to enjoy my triumph.

稍微停下来享受我的胜利

- I-I wouldn't-- - He's my true enemy!

-我觉得不... -他才是我真正的敌人

Instead of heckling my friends,

我不该用黑话攻击我的朋友们

I am gonna call that old twat

而该打电话给那个老混蛋

- and tear him to pieces. - Uh, no, no, J-Jimmy!

-用撕逼大法把他撕成碎片 -不吉米

- Thanks, Edgar. - ‭Do not do that.

-谢谢埃德加 -别那么做

This is the first good idea you've ever had.

这是你有史以来想出过的第一个好主意

Oh, no, Bing Bong!

不冰棒

Bing Bong!

冰棒

Dad...

爸爸

Oh, no. Oh, this is bad.

不好大事不妙

This is bad.

大事不妙

Is he crying?

他哭了吗

It's really snotty and moany, isn't it?

他在哽咽抽泣鼻涕糊一脸对吧

Bye!

再见

- I'm gonna move to Arizona and sell turquoise jewelry. - No!

-我要搬去亚利桑那州卖绿松石珠宝 -不要

He's gonna call his dad!

他要打电话给他爸

Wait, wait! You didn't tell him?!

等等你没告诉他吗

Not at all.

完全没说

Holy crap!

完蛋了

We have to stop him.

我们必须阻止他

Or maybe we don't.

或许不用

Think it through.

仔细想想

One of the trash-bag sisters picks up.

他的某个垃圾姐妹接了电话

Confusion, confusion.

一阵困惑之后

Oy, ya daft fart.

你个死混球

We sent the obit. Da's dead.

我们给你寄了讣告爸爸死了

And boom! A couple of weeks from now,

然后突然跳到几周之后

I have a tan line shaped like Grumpy Cat,

我身上会形成一道不爽猫形状的美黑线

because she's been sitting on my lap on the cruise deck...

因为在巡游船的甲板上它一直坐在我的大腿上

Gretchen, you don't get to be in charge anymore!

格雷琴现在轮不到你来发号施令了

What? You can't do that.

什么你不能这么做

My man takes charge.

一切都听我家男人指挥

Everyone who's not currently on hobble sticks,

现在所有没拄着拐杖的人

go down there and stop him from calling his dead father!

都赶紧给我滚下去阻止他打电话给他的亡父

A ghost picks up the phone, I'm gonna shit my pants.

如果接电话的是个鬼那我一定吓得拉屎在裤裆里

Oh, God.

天啊

We're too late.

我们太迟了

Shh, what's he saying?

嘘他在说些什么

Hey, Ronny, it's your son.

嘿罗尼我是你儿子

You're probably at the pub passed out in your stool

你现在可能在酒吧里坐在高脚凳上昏睡了过去

over a half-eaten scotch egg in lard sauce,

嘴里蘸着猪油酱的苏格兰蛋才吃了一半

but I just wanted to let you know...

但我希望你知道...

I sold a book, Daddy.

我的书卖出去了爸

Good luck.

祝你好运

Thanks for sticking up for me earlier.

谢谢你之前挺我

Of course.

当然了

That's my job.

那是我的使命

I love you.

我爱你

I think my wound is weeping again.

我的伤口好像又裂开了

Hey, dude?

嘿老兄

Can I give you my profesh medical opinion?

我能给你一些专业的医学意见吗

Yeah.

好啊

You need some help.

你需要帮助

I know.

我知道

Just got off the phone with my father.

我刚跟我爸通完电话

Sure gave it to old Ronny.

把罗尼好好抨击了一番

First, I jabbed him about his illiteracy

首先我狂批他是个大文盲

and then his pulmonary oxygen absorption rate.

然后又损了一下他的肺部氧吸收速率

Jimmy, your dad died.

吉米你爸死了

Yeah, when I heckled him so hard.

是啊我把他黑那么狠他气死了

This came in the mail. I'm so sorry!

这是之前寄过来的我很遗憾

罗纳德·奥弗利享年62岁

I'm just gonna...

我那个...

我爱上的人是奇葩 第三季 You're the Worst Season 3 第3集: Bad News：Dude's Dead

台词

我爱上的人是奇葩第三季 You're the Worst Season 3 第3集: Bad News：Dude's Dead