This one's from me. The ribboning isn't my best --
I have carpal tunnel.
My new company is putting me up at The Prescott,
a luxury residence with full amenities.
I admit, this extravagant lifestyle
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最新连载海外影视剧下载仅供交流学习 禁止商用盈利请登陆 www.YYeTs.com
can make me a little uncomfortable.
Another candle. Thanks, everyone.
又是蜡烛 谢谢了啊 各位
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Alex, you should know
that a crook works at the hair salon downstairs --
Adolfo of Venice.
Isn't he the colorist to the stars?
Thank you for asking even though I know you know.
Adolfo of Venice is actually
Alan Carpman of Bakersfield.
We started as hairdressers together,
but he stole my hair dye formula.
For a family of generally lovely people,
we sure have a lot of rivals.
You know what, it's been fun, but it's time to go.
You haven't even opened the candle that Cam and I got you.
And don't we get a tour of the building?
This place has everything.
Um, an archery range, a shark tank, a --
射箭场 鲨鱼池 以及...
Sorry, I've got a huge project due.
We can always just explore on our own.
Actually, you can't.
There's a strict "No unaccompanied guests" policy.
I violate that, they kick me out.
I'll have the valet fetch your cars.
Oh, you can do that from here?
Yeah, everything's automated.
You just need a resident ID code.
- Bye, Phil. - Bye.
-再见 菲尔 -再见
All right, well, I parked on the street,
so I'll just meet you at home.
- Bye, Claire. - I need to run to the mall.
-再见 克莱尔 -我需要去一趟商场
Would you pick up some steaks from the farmers market for tonight?
Oh, so you did remember it's date night.
I was a little worried after your response to my Paperless Post.
You know my maybes always turn into will attends.
When was the last time that you and I
cooked a romantic dinner together?
We did it last week.
I'm not talking about sprinkling hot dog slices on a DiGiorno's.
You couldn't bring my car before I got in trouble?
I've been secretly moonlighting as an online food blogger,
"Foodie in a Hoodie"
it rhymes on the page.
I've quickly developed a huge following,
and The Prescott is home to the city's hottest restaurant,
Forgive me. I'm new here.
Still getting to know each of the tenants.
I'm your concierge, Higgins.
You look so familiar. Have we met?
I do get that a lot, though.
I have an everyman face and body.
Patrols the building for non-residents
using a motion sensor and face scanner.
Useful, yes, but does he have that uniquely human ability
to anticipate a person's every need?
I didn't even know I wanted this!
Anything else I can help you with, sir?
No. I'm just headed down to the restaurant.
You know -- uh, waiters, cutlery, daily specials.
就是 服务生 餐具 每日特色菜
I think it's called Pardon.
- Of course. My mistake. - It's all right.
-当然了 我的错 -没事
Avoiding the security robot would be tricky,
but Finley had a weakness --
he can only detect people if they're moving.
And it was worth the risk --
Pardon claimed to have the world's best beef slider,
and my -- my followers are dying for a review.
Screen name "Close to Utlaw," Wherever that is.
We recently got into a -- a heated comment war.
Insults were hurled, mothers disparaged.
Who knew the Internet could be so negative?
Table for one. I live here.
Something just opened up.
Great, lead the way. I live here.
好极了 带路吧 我住这里
Hi. Uh, I'm new here.
Could you lead me to the screening room?
I should think so.
At the butler academy, I led my class in leading.
Recently, I got a special edition Blu-ray
of the best movie ever made, "Lawrence of Arabia."
Word is, The Prescott has
a state-of-the-art screening room with surround sound.
Know what it doesn't have?
Hello! I would've gone with a tracking shot there.
I sure hope he finds a plot out there in that desert.
Behold, our famous candy wall.
Hey, Sugar Babies.
Yes, honey buns?
No, Sugar Babies. The greatest movie candy of all time.
A thousand apologies.
I will track some down for you straight away.
- You wouldn't mind? - Mind? Please.
-你不介意吗 -介意什么 拜托
There is no greater joy
than fetching something I've never heard of
for someone I've only just met.
May I help you with something?
No, I'm just -- I'm waiting for someone.
And his name is David Beckham.
Resident at The Prescott.
Okay, Mitchell hates it when I do this,
but every time I meet a celebrity,
I ask them to record my outgoing message.
My current one is from when I saw Snoop Dogg at a bank.
Sorry I missed you. As you can see --
And sometimes things can --
Please leave a message, including your phone number,
- just for -- - Security!
Hey, sweetie, what's up? I'm -- I'm kind of busy.
宝贝 什么事 我这会儿有点忙
Cam, I'm hurt. It's my leg.
小卡 我受伤了 是我的腿
I slipped in the food court,
and I'm all sticky and tweens are laughing at me.
You have to come pick me up.
Well, that sounds awful, but --
Isn't -- Isn't Claire closer?
Well, you're at the farmers market right down the street.
Okay, fine. I'm on my way.
Aww, you're the best.
I was not gonna let Cam ruin my chance
to thank my wallpaper, Victoria Beckham, one-on-one.
Okay, so, it was 1997.
I was in Detroit for a Spice Girls concert with my girlfriend.
I was going to propose to her,
had the ring in my pocket and everything,
when from the stage, Posh looked right at me and said,
"Be true to yourself, Mitchell!"
Okay, you know, she might've said "Michigan,"
but she was looking right at me!
She inspired me to come out that night.
I had that diamond reset as an anklet charm,
and I was off to the races.
What kind of gym bag is that, anyway?
It's a satchel, you ignorant sneeze.
You have been so unpleasant lately.
On a definitely related note,
Manny hasn't gotten any action in months.
Well, other than whatever gave him carpal tunnel.
Luckily, The Prescott has an '80s aerobi-cise class,
which will be full of single older ladies.
Women hit a sweet spot right after 40
where they still look great
but their standards have lowered.
You're in pretty good shape for someone who's...
Oh, Mr. Beckham. Apologies.
Blind as a bat without these bad boys.
So, myself and Courteney are expecting a bowling instructor.
Would you have him meet us
downstairs at the bowling alley, please?
You and Ms. Cox getting an edge
for this weekend's celebrity bowl-a-thon?
Oh, we'll need it.
You should've seen the way he bowled last year.
I mean, it is to raise money for charity.
Yeah, a dollar for each of the 18 pins that you knocked down.
Thanks to you, Doctors Without Borders
are now Doctors Without Malaria Pills.
Did you see the two friends in the back?
The blond one liked me, and the brunette kept staring at you.
No one moves to "Caribbean Queen" Like me.
Ah, just who I was told to be on the lookout for.
A certain couple have asked
that you meet them in the bowling alley.
Was it a blonde and a brunette?
Indeed, and they seemed eager to get rolling.
These girls are freaky.
- Just off the courtyard to your right. - Thank you.
-穿过院子 在您右手边 -谢谢
I've always wanted to dye my hair dark.
But there's only one colorist I would trust to do it --
Adolfo of Venice.
Gloria's sworn enemy.
I just have to sneak back in and do it without her knowing.
Hi, Alex. Hey, honey.
So, how's the project going?
I'm never gonna make this deadline.
Oh, yeah, no, that -- that -- that's tough...
I'm sorry -- sorry to hear that.
Work is so stressful.
Yeah, got to go, love you! Bye!
我得挂了 爱你哦 再见
Just hop on the elevator
and press the big button marked "Pool."
I am known as the fearless one of the family.
So, when Claire gave us all free passes
for the Fun Town Water Park next week,
I couldn't admit that I am afraid of slides.
They go so fast, I feel like I'm going to fly off.
I just need to try it once and I am going to be fine.
Hey, no backsies!
You should have let me do backsies!
Resident ID access -- hair salon.
What? Who's using my code?!
You a-look like that a-actress...
This is Phil Dunphy. Leave a message.
Phil, I have a little surprise for you later.
Let's just say I know how much you love brunettes.
- Here's a menu for you. - Thank you.
And for my followers...
an Instagram tease.
Your Sugar Babies, sir.
I hope it wasn't too much trouble.
There was a Mexican birthday celebration
taking place in the park across the street.
I waited for the crack of the pinata,
mixed in seamlessly with the children,
Some moron food blogger took a shot
at one of my favorite spots.
So I go after him using my screen name, "Closet Outlaw."
It escalates, and he turns his army of followers against me.
As I wrote in my last comment --
"Let's see how well my fist pairs with your face."
If she sees us, she'll throw us out.
If that blonde and brunette come by,
could you tell them there's a new meet-up spot?
The hot tubs on the rooftop.
Of course, warm things up a bit before your workout.
If there's nothing else, I need to make sure
these balls are marked with their correct weights.
and anything with a steel toe for me.
Someone drops his ball a lot.
There has been a change of plan.
Your bowling instructor would now like you to meet him
in the hot tubs for a warmup first.
- Meet you up there? - Yep.
If you're calling the charity for a new partner,
it's not gonna work.
They already made the posters.
- Ready to order? - Very.
I came to this restaurant for one thing and one thing only.
And that thing is...?
Sorry. Uh, one of your world fa--
One of our world's fattest hot dogs coming up.
No! The-the slider.
And how would you like it?
- Yes, you, sir. - ...dium rare.
-是的 您 先生 -要三分熟
And can you have it delivered to the pool, please?
Okay, that slider goes to the pool,
and it looks like we need one for Mr. Beckham to the roof.
You seen a guy in a black hoodie?
- Just left. - Thanks.
I'm dying to try one of your world's fattest hot dogs.
Hey, you here at the mall?
No, not yet. Why are you breathing so hard?
Oh, um, a bunch of kids were vaping next to me,
and I had to army-crawl into a-a candle store.
Yeah. Is there anything you want while I'm here?
Can I tell you what I want, what I really, really want?
You're watching me right now, aren't you?
I was hoping I'd run into Posh
here at the gym for a private moment, okay?
Look, we're both after the Beckhams.
Let's come up with a plan together --
meet me at the swim-up bar.
There's a swim-up bar?!
I know, we should be living here
and Alex should be living in our stupid house.
Higgins, I need you!
A spot of bother, I see?
Oh, of course you can.
I'll just crawl in front of you
so you can grab me around the waist.
I apologize in advance for any giggling.
I'm cursed with the tickle gene.
Someone's stuck on the slide.
She tried to climb back down, but --
- No backsies, I get it. - Yeah.
-滑梯不许倒退 我懂 -是啊
Oh, oh, oh! That's for me.
- But it goes too fast! - Oh, no, don't worry.
-可是速度太快了 -不 别担心
I shall vary the flex of my buttocks to control our speed.
My deepest apologies!
I need some sparkling water sent up to the hot tub cabanas.
Can't say for whom,
but let's include a glass of champagne
in case his posh wife joins him.
I need your help getting my hands on the slider.
Quite a looker, that one.
Well, that's the problem -- so far,
I've only been able to look and not taste.
Say no more. I shall find a way to deliver the slider to you.
Great! Um, is there somewhere private
where I could enjoy the slider alone?
Might I suggest one of our rooftop hot tubs
overlooking the city?
Perfect, I'll wait there.
And I'll-I'll need a bib -- I can make a mess.
How'd I get back here?
Your husband has asked that you meet him
up in one of the rooftop hot tubs for some champagne.
Higgins! The slides aren't the enemy.
It's always a thrill to see one of my residents grow.
By the way, a certain mystery man
has spotted you around the building
and has requested your presence on the roof.
Jay's finally doing something romantic!
Just when I thought he was a clueless grouch.
How many lobbies does this place have?!
Excuse me. Where can I find a bathing suit?
Oh, there are complimentary suits in all of the cabanas.
Worry not, I boil them myself nightly.
Let's see a robot do that.
Hi, Higgins. We have a bit of an unusual request.
Now, we know you need to be discreet, but...
we are hoping to have a rendezvous
with a certain distinguished Brit.
Consider it arranged.
Still no sign of the ladies.
Maybe they're in a different cabana.
Let's wait for the blonde.
I only know how to do this with even numbers.
Can you tell me where to go for my romantic surprise?
Now mine's here, but yours is gone.
Now they're both gone!
Maybe one of them had a nanny emergency.
Let's wait for them in there.
Arriving shortly. Cabana 3.
Here we are, then.
Higgins, what are you doing?!
I know I am but a lowly stable boy,
unwanted in the master's quarters, but --
Perhaps you'd like to teach me a lesson?
Just stay away from the face.
Uh, obviously there's been some sort of misunderstanding.
Yeah, do we look like the kind of people
that would be into some sort of weird role play
involving a stable boy?
I'm assuming he's been naughty
and would do anything to keep his job.
In my defense, I do get this request quite often.
Particularly around the holidays.
we were hoping to meet a certain celebrity couple.
I make no promises, but let me just
wriggle back into my shorts and make some inquiries.
Ah, wonderful timing!
Please step into Cabana 3 -- your mystery man awaits.
I know that you and I aren't supposed to be here,
but after today,
I am tired of living a life of fear.
Was Gloria Claire's brunette surprise?
It all started when Claire gave me a free pass to Fun Town.
I thought, just try it today.
Take a ride, see how it feels.
Oh. I never noticed how sexy your feet are.
Thank you, but this isn't happening, Gloria!
谢谢夸奖 但我们真的不可以 歌洛莉亚
Oh, there you are. Sorry we missed you at the bowling alley.
She looked different with a headband on.
Warming up in a hot tub first --
unconventional, but, hey, anything to loosen up Becks.
Did we meet a Becky?
Maybe. There were so many of them.
So, how old is this Becks?
Oh, there you are.
Wait... you're Becks?
Yep, and I'm eager to learn.
A warning -- my form is clumsy, but I'm great on my feet.
警告一下 我身材比较走形了 但我的腿功还是一流
Okay, who gets the dude?
This never happened.
Fine, I'll take him.
But we're just gonna hang out and see where it goes.
Pardon the interruption.
It looks like you're finished with the slider?
I am, and can I be honest? I prefer bigger buns.
是啊 我能说句实话吗 我喜欢面包[屁股]大点
It's wonderful to just talk like men sometimes, isn't it?
Jay, what are you doing here?
I've spent the whole day looking for that miserable --
You're the Foodie in a Who-dy?!
W-Why would you say that?
I'm trying, but I'm lost!
You insulted my mother!
Oh, my God. You're Close to Utlaw?!
It's Closet Outlaw!
Jay, I don't blame you for being mad.
I-I turned my legions of fans against you, and, uh...
it's Foodie in a Hoodie, by -- by the way.
But you got a bigger problem at home that I just heard about,
and I think I can help you with it.
- Claire? - Oh! Gloria.
I can't believe you recognized me.
I'm so sorry about my hair.
I'm so glad that we can finally talk about it.
Grow it out, let yourself be a girl.
Okay, final set of instructions
on a day that will no doubt be a memorable chapter
in my forthcoming memoir, "You Rang?"
Honey, if you don't like my hair, I can change it.
亲爱的 如果你不喜欢我的头发 我可以改掉
What? I love it.
Maybe next week I can arrange
a little rendezvous with a redhead.
I'm glad we cleared that up.
I can't wait for my bowling lesson with you.
Foot-y in a Hoodie was here today.
When does Posh get here?
And I apologize for being late.
You know, I-I left a message.
I'm sorry I missed your call.
Can you say that one more time?
So, I got a few incidental charges from yesterday.
Two hundred dollars for sugar babie procurement.
Eight sliders and one coconut water?
He charged me for that?
Three hundred dollars for a slide rescue.
Forty dollars fine for the non-wiping of stationary bike.
You are sweating right now.
A hundred and fifty dollars fine for the non-return of legwarmers.
And eight one hundred dollar west world entry fees?
Oh my God! We left Cam there.