老爸老妈的浪漫史第八季双语台词对白剧本

Kids, in late 2012,

孩子们在2012年年末

I received a very important text message.

我收到了一条非常重要的短信

巴尼·斯丁森罗宾和我订婚啦

Uncle Barney and aunt Robin were engaged.

巴尼叔叔和罗宾阿姨订婚了

Marking a truly happy time for our little group.

我们这个小集体进入了无比欢乐的时光

The problem was,

而问题是

one of us was definitely not happy

我们中的某人倒是不怎么开心

Marvin will not stop crying.

马文止不住地哭啊

What do you guys think it is? Is he hungry?

你们觉得是什么原因是不是肚子饿了

Well, that must be it!

肯定是这个原因

Thank you for thinking of that, Ted!

真是一语惊醒梦中人啊泰德

And here we were, just watering him,

瞧瞧我们俩只知道给他浇水

facing him towards sun light!

让他朝阳进行光合作用

Sorry, I haven't slept in... January.

抱歉自新年起我就没睡过觉

Food going in isn't the problem.

马文进食不是问题

It's what's coming out, or not coming out.

排便才是又或者说没有排便

He hasn't pooped in three days.

他已经3天没有便便了

Normally, I wouln't wish one of his dirty diapers on my worst enemy.

一般来说我对脏尿布是恨之入骨

But now, I kinda miss pop in the hood in the morning,

但现在我倒是挺想念早晨打开尿布的时光

- and finding that first big, juicy, black-- - Lily!

-看见那大条多汁黑乎乎的... -莉莉

I'm eating chili. I'm eating chili, Lily.

我这正吃香辣炖肉酱呢莉莉

confetti!

彩条

Big blast of confetti!

简直就是彩条大爆炸啊

Normally, the kid's a confetti machine.

一般来说那孩子就是彩条喷射机啊

He's Rip Taylor in a diaper.

他就是婴儿版的雷普·泰勒

美国喜剧演员经常以撒彩条方式登场

I have a feeling at this point,

我有预感这个时刻

Rip Taylor is Rip Taylor in a diaper.

我家的雷普·泰勒又在喷"彩条"了

And with that image, dinner is done.

如此生动的视觉形容这饭是不用吃了

- Hey, guys. - Well, well, well.

-伙计们 -啧啧

Here comes the bride.

新娘驾到

Now the annoying part, right?

最棘手的部分要开始了对吧

Planning the wedding?

策划婚礼

So not fun, right?

太无趣了对吧

I don't know-- I'm kind of looking forward to it.

怎么说呢我还挺期待的

Fine, I'll do it for you.

好吧那我就帮帮你吧

First thing we need to do is set a date.

首先要定好时间

May 25, 2013.

2013年5月25日

Thank you, Ted.

谢谢你泰德

The ladies are talking.

女人说话男人闪边

Actually, that is the date.

其实这就是婚期

Ted offered to help with the planning a little.

泰德毛遂自荐帮忙策划了一点

And, well, uh...

然后呢...

That's a big binder.

这文件夹真够大的

Oh, this?

这个吗

This is just cakes.

这只是婚礼蛋糕的内容而已

Anyway, we're having the ceremony

对了典礼地点选在

at that beautiful little church out on Long Island,

长岛上那个美丽的小教堂

where Victoria almost got married-- lovely spot.

也就是我和维多利亚差点结婚的地方

And then we're gonna have a reception in a big white tent

在酒店前的草坪搭一个巨大的白色帐篷

on the front lawn of the hotel.

用来宴请宾客

Oh, and, uh, the colors are cream and lilac.

颜色嘛以乳白和淡紫为主

I will cut you, bitch.

老娘要把你碎尸万段贱人

No, L-L-Lily...

别莉莉...

m 20 0 l 209 0 b b b 11 228 0 218 0 209 l 0 20 b 0 11 11 0 20 0

b

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原创翻译双语字幕

翻译：小豆丁冰蓝猫中之王独醉

校对：猫中之王 YY 总监 YY

后期：孤帆时间轴：加森

老爸老妈浪漫史第八季第十三集

I'm cool, I'm cool.

我没事没事了

Hey, Robin, where's Barney?

罗宾巴尼人呢

Did he skip town already?

才订婚就跑路了吗

If so, exactly what time was it?

若真是跑了什么时候跑的

It's important for the over/under.

具体时间对于赌注输赢很重要

Barney's fine, it's just... well, earlier this morning...

巴尼没事只是今天早晨...

So, it's been three days since I said yes.

距我答应你求婚已经三天了

True.

的确

And your panic attacks are getting

你的恐慌发作的时间也越来越短

shorter and further apart.

次数越来越少

I can't do this! I feel like I'm drowning!

我办不到我快要窒息而亡了

Also true.

确实如此

So I guess we're officially engaged.

看来我们可以正式算订婚了

Maybe we should tell our parents.

或许我们该通知一下父母吧

I assume my dad already knows-- you did call him

我猜我爸已经知道了吧你给他打过电话

and got his permission, right?

得到了他的允许对吧

Yeah, yeah, Robin.

是啊是啊罗宾

I bought you with an ox and some spices from the East.

你是我用几头公牛和来自东土的香料换回来的

Uh, he's gonna put you in a cage.

他要把你关在笼子里

and send you on horseback to my remote desert camp.

放在马背上运到我那偏远的沙漠营地里

- Okay, Barney... - Hold on, I'm not done.

-好了巴尼 -慢着我还没说完

Where you'll be bathed in perfumes and oils

你用香水和精油沐浴净身

and delivered to my tent.

然后送至我的帐篷中

After you perform the traditional Dance of the Seven Veils,

在你表演完那传统的七重面纱之舞后

we'll adjourn to the tiger skin rug where we'll...

我们将躺在虎皮地毯上...

- Barney... - Robin!

-巴尼 -罗宾

If we're gonna build a marriage together,

我俩若想共筑婚姻

we have got to stop interrupting each other all the time.

就千万不要总是打断对方说话

Fine, finish your story.

行吧讲完你的故事

Thank you.

谢谢

Where we'll do it.

翻云覆雨

Did you ask for my father's permission?

你有得到我爸的允许吗

No, I did not.

没有

So, as some of you know, my dad is a little scary.

你们也知道我爹有点小可怕

A little? Dude's a stone cold Slytherin.

才有点吗你爸堪称食死徒般的可怕

He always looks like he just came from slapping

他面露凶光总感觉像是刚抽完

some guy tied to a chair in a back room.

某个捆在密室椅子上的人的耳光

Anyway, we go get lunch...

总之我们三个一同吃午餐

Look, I know I already told you this,

听着我知道我警告过你

but my dad is a scary guy.

但我爸真的很可怕

Please, I think I can handle...

拜托我能搞定他

Oh, vampire in the daylight, vampire in the daylight!

不惧光的吸血鬼不惧光的吸血鬼啊

Oh, my God.

天啊

Hello, Robin.

你好罗宾

Hello, sir.

你好先生

Put that thing away,

把手拿开

Give your old man a hug.

给你老爸一个拥抱

And then it got really scary.

而噩梦才刚刚开始

I'm glad you could meet me here

我很高兴你们能约在

at my favorite restaurant.

我最喜欢的餐厅见面

Carol and I come here all the time.

我和卡罗尔经常来这里

I... you...

我...你...

When... Da... who's Carol?

什么...怎么... 卡罗尔是谁

Oh, right, you haven't met Carol, um...

对哦你还没见过卡罗尔呢

Very special woman.

非常特别的女人

48 years old, dental hygienist, no kids.

年方48 牙科清洁师膝下无子

Likes Zumba.

喜欢跳尊巴舞

She's the reason I moved to New York City.

为了她我才搬到纽约来

Eight months ago. Thanks for the call, by the way.

8个月前就来了谢谢您现在才告诉我

Well, I figured you knew.

我以为你知道呢

It's on my Facebook page.

我在脸书页面上更新了

You really should respond to my friend request.

你真应该通过我的好友申请

I post a lot of great stuff.

我经常贴一些很棒的东西

Are you familiar with memes?

你知道什么是"网络爆红"吗

There's a cat who says,

一只猫竟然说

"I can has cheeseburger?"

"我想吃芝士汉堡"

Okay, what the hell happened to you?

你到底怎么了

Robin, I know in the past, I have been...

罗宾我知道过去我一直...

emotionally distant.

挺冷漠的

But Carol has brought out

但是卡罗尔发掘了

a whole new side of me.

我全新的一面

I have a new outlook on life

我有了全新的人生观

a devil-may-care insouciance that embodies the credo,

无忧无虑逍遥自在就像我的信条

"No shirt, no shoes, no problem."

"没衣服没鞋子没问题"

Robin...

罗宾

I'm fun now.

我变得有趣了

Oh, God.

天啊

- He's fun now? - That does not sound fun.

-他变得有趣了吗 -听起来一点也不有趣啊

No child should have to see a parent go through that.

孩子不该看到家长变成那个样子

Well, it probably took some of the pressure

这样的话巴尼对见家长这件事的

off the Barney of it all.

压力应该减轻不少吧

Sir, hi.

您好先生

My name is Barney Stinson.

我叫巴尼·斯丁森

This is Barney?

这是巴尼吗

This man is blond.

这货居然是金发

Grown men are not blond.

成熟男人才不会留金发呢

Dad.

爸爸

Pleased to meet you.

很高兴见到你

That's a very...

你的头发...

fun hair color.

颜色真搞笑

That's nothing-- when he met me, his first words were,

那不算什么他和我见面时第一句话是

- "Nice blouse" - You were wearing a blouse.

-女衬衫不错 -你穿的就是女衬衫

It was not a blouse!

才不是女衬衫呢

Oh, great. You're all here.

太好了你们都在

Let's talk about our wedding band.

商讨一下婚礼乐队的事吧

How much do you guys think they should rock?

你们觉得他们应该有多嗨

'Cause I vote, a million.

我觉得应该嗨翻天

Yeah, yeah, I think we already settled on a DJ, so...

是啊我们早就定好DJ了啊

Lily, do you remember the band you guys

莉莉你还记得你们结婚时

almost hired for your wedding?

差点请的乐队吗

Remember them?

何止记得

I'll call them up and book them for you.

我可以帮你打电话预定

Just say the word.

只要你一句话

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I feel like we keep coming back

是啊是啊我觉得我们又绕回来

to this DJ thing.

说DJ的事了

What do you think, baby?

你觉得呢宝贝

Yeah, I don't think anyone should book anything right now.

我觉得现在决定还为时尚早

Why not?

为什么

Well, I am going to go the room marked "Spaghettis,"

我要去标有"意大利面"的洗手间了

which I'm hoping is the ladies room.

但愿那是女厕

"Meatballs" Has to be men's, right?

"肉球"什么的应该是指男厕对吧

I don't know what the hell "Calamaris" Is.

虽然我搞不懂"鱿鱼"代表的是什么鬼东西

Sir, I-I-I...

先生我...

Permission denied.

我不准

And it turns out, "Spaghettis" are men.

结果 "意大利面"是男厕

I saw a noodle.

我还看见了一根"面条"

- He said no? - Yeah, I don't know what we're gonna do.

-他不同意吗 -对啊我不知道该如何是好

Relax, baby. I got this.

别紧张宝贝交给我

I know how to be persuasive.

我知道如何说服他人

The next day, Uncle Barney met Robin's dad

第二天巴尼叔叔约罗宾的爸爸

for lunch at the same restaurant.

在同一家餐厅吃午饭

This time, with a plan.

这次他制定了计划

Hello, Mr. Scherbatsky.

您好特布罗斯基先生

I think we got off on the wrong foot.

我想我第一次没给您留下好印象

You have my attention.

你现在吸引到我的注意了

I left the meatball at home

我让"肉球"待在家里

so I could talk to you spaghetti to spaghetti.

这样我们就能"面"对"面"谈谈

Sir...

先生

I'm very serious about marrying your daughter.

我是诚心诚意想娶您的女儿

Barney, when I wanted to marry Robin's mother,

巴尼我想和罗宾的妈妈结婚时

I slaughtered a whole family of bears

我赤手空拳屠杀了

with my bare hands.

一窝熊

I gave the pelts

我把熊皮

and the bear meat to her father as tribute.

和熊肉给她爸爸作为聘礼

You know what we call that in Canada?

你知道这在加拿大叫什么吗

Manners.

规矩

Would either of you like a mudslide?

你们想来一杯"山崩"饮料吗

I just had one. Thank you.

我刚"崩"过了谢谢

I'll have a Jazzy Pizzazzy Razzleberry Rainbow Milkshake

我要一杯浮彩绚丽彩虹奶昔

with a swirly straw?

上面插一根弯吸管

You didn't say the magic word.

你忘了说那个神奇的[请]字哦

I'll go get your drink.

小的这就去拿您的饮料

Still crying, huh?

还哭着呢

Yeah. We've tried everything short

对我们试尽了一切办法

of a pack of smokes and a cup of coffee.

除了让他抽烟和喝咖啡

Still nothing but clean dipeys.

他尿布还是干干净净没有粑粑

There's only one explanation for this.

只剩下一个解释了

Marvin has potty-trained himself.

马文自己学会了上厕所

He sneaks into the bathroom while we're sleeping.

他趁我们睡觉时去厕所

I'll ask Barney to check the tapes.

我去让巴尼看监控录像

Barney has cameras in our bathroom?!

巴尼在咱家厕所装了摄像头吗

Well, I mean, don't you think?

你难道觉得他没有吗

- Hey, guys. - Robin, good.

-你们好 -罗宾真好

You're here. Bad news.

你来了坏消息

That wedding band you wanted is booked for May 25.

你想要的那婚礼乐队5月25日已经被预定了

Oh, no. What are you gonna do?

不是吧你打算怎么办

Oh! Oh, hey! Here's an idea.

对了我有个主意

Oh, God, Ted, if you suggest a DJ...

天啊泰德如果你提议请DJ

Far from it.

才不是

I was going to suggest a band.

我是想推荐一支乐队

A band called... Kool and the Gang.

名字叫库尔伙伴

爵士乐队其代表作Celebration是婚礼常用曲

Robin,

罗宾

would you like for me

你愿意让我

to get Kool and the Gang to play at your wedding?

预定库尔伙伴在你的婚礼上表演吗

Uh... I... yeah, guess so.

应该可以吧

And would it be okay if they invited their friends,

他们邀请朋友来可以吗

Beyonce and-and ABBA,

碧昂斯阿巴乐队

and the Bee Gees,

比吉斯乐队

and Journey,

旅途乐队

and Queen?

皇后乐队

What? You're...? What are you say...?

什么你说什么

How... how is that even possible?

这一切怎么可能办到

I'll tell you how.

我告诉你怎么办到

You hire a DJ.

请个DJ

Wicka-wicka-wicka-burn.

小手一转万事俱备

Ugh! God, this is, like,

天啊这大概是

the fifteenth time my dad has sent me a friend request.

我爸第十五次给我发送好友申请了

I'm just gonna hit "Accept."

我干脆点"接受"算了

- No, no, no. - No, no, no, no, don't do it, Robin.

-千万不行 -别这样罗宾

You don't want to see what's behind that door.

你不会想看见那扇门背后都藏着什么

What are you talking about?

你在说什么呢

He's talking about

他说的是

my mom's 2,000-word review of Fifty Shades of Grey.

我妈为《五十度灰》写的两千字书评

风靡美国的情色小说

And 14 of those words were "Vulva."

其中有十四个词都是"阴部"

You're gonna get endless requests to play some game

你会收到无数多的邀请

that has something to do with gangsters and farming.

邀你去玩黑帮游戏或者开心农场

Never mind the embarrassing cheerleading photos

还有令人尴尬的高中时代

from high school.

参加拉拉队的照片

- Begged my mom to burn those. - Robin,

-我都跪求我我妈烧掉那些照片了 -罗宾

trust me,

相信我

no good can come from accepting that friend request.

接受父母的好友申请绝对没有好下场

Yeah, I-I think I may have given you guys the wrong impression.

我大概是误导了你们大家

Okay, my dad is actually not that bad of a guy.

我爸他其实不是个坏人

Do it, Barney. Squeeze that trigger.

下手吧巴尼果断扣下扳机

I don't want to do this.

人家不想做嘛

Well, you think I wanted to kill that bear?

你以为我当年想杀掉那只熊吗

- Yeah, kind of. - Oh, yeah, you're right.

-我觉得你是想的 -你说得对

I can't do this.

我下不了手

What... what the hell is this?!

你们在搞什么呢

Your dad is crazy!

你爸是个疯子

He wanted me to kill Fluffernutter!

他非逼我杀了棉花酱不可

I told you not to give him a name!

告诉你不要给他取名字

Well, I did!

我就取了

I gave him a name and a backstory!

我不但取了名还帮他编了个来历

He comes from a magical rabbit warren

他来自一个魔法小兔窝

underneath the old rusty tractor.

一家老小住在老锈的拖拉机下

He was the runt of the litter, but he persevered.

他出生时先天不足但却坚韧地活了下来

- He... - Oh, give me this. Give it to me!

-他... -把枪给我还给我

Dad, is there, um, something you want to tell me?

爸你就没有什么事要告诉我吗

Well, in the early '80s, I did some wet work for the CIA.

80年代初期我曾为中央情报局干过脏活

Yes, Daddy, I remember the bedtime stories.

爸睡前故事我记忆犹新

No, I'm, uh, talking about your Facebook page?

不我指的是你的脸书

It says you're married.

上面写着你结婚了

Well...

那个

yes, uh, Carol and I were in Key Largo

是的卡罗尔和我当时在基拉戈

at a performance of the recording artist James Buffett.

参加吉米·布菲特的演唱会

老牌乡村摇滚歌星

We're what are known as Parrotheads.

我们是铁杆的"鹦鹉头"

鹦鹉头是吉米·布菲特粉丝团的昵称

And, uh, well, one thing led to the other, and, uh...

总而言之一来二去

we got married.

我们就结婚了

You didn't want to tell me about it?

你不打算告诉我这件事吗

I Facebooked it... on Facebook.

我发脸书了啊在脸书上宣布了

Okay, you know what, Dad?

好吧知道吗老爸

Since you obviously have no interest in involving me

既然你不想让我和你的私生活

in your personal life, I may as well tell you:

扯上关系我就告诉你

Barney and I are already engaged.

巴尼和我已经订婚了

That's right.

她说得没错

I'm behind you on this, Robin.

我是你的坚强后盾罗宾

Directly behind you.

坚定地躲在你背后

Anyway, this is happening.

总之事情就是这样

And since I wasn't invited to your wedding,

既然你不邀请我参加你的婚礼

you're not invited to mine.

你也别想来参加我的婚礼

Good-bye.

再见吧

Oh, no!

不好了

Fluffernutter peed all over my pants!

棉花酱尿了我一裤子

So, I just called up that wedding band's road manager

我给那个婚礼乐队的经纪人打了电话

to get the number of the people who booked them for the 25th,

要来了预定25号的人的电话

so I could bribe them into giving up the band.

希望能塞点钱让他们取消预定

You did what?! That is so dishonest!

你都做了什么这实在太卑鄙了

No matter what happens next, I think we can all agree,

不管接下来发生了什么我们都一致同意

you're in the wrong here, Lily.

你真是卑鄙无耻莉莉

It's your number, Ted.

那就是你的电话泰德

All right, you got me!

好吧被你逮到了

I put a non-refundable deposit on that band

我付了乐队一笔无法退还的定金

to keep Barney and Robin from booking them.

好让巴尼和罗宾订不到他们

And I would've gotten away with it

我本来可以成功骗过你们

if it wasn't a really stupid and expensive plan.

如果这计划不是那么愚蠢又那么昂贵的话

Dude, why would you do that?

老兄你干嘛要这么做

I don't see what the big deal is.

我不觉得这有什么重要的

The big deal is Robin deserves better

重要的是罗宾值得拥有更好的选择

than some crappy, unreliable band!

而不是某支蹩脚又不靠谱的乐队

Sure, bands seem cool

乐队表面看起来是不错

with their nice suits and their well-rehearsed moves,

衣服帅举手抬足都精心排练过

but let's be honest: bands let you down.

可老实说乐队总会让人失望

They-They cheat, they deceive,

他们会撒谎欺骗

and God knows they've slept with every girl in New York City.

他们睡遍了纽约市的每个女人

I just, I can't believe

我只是不敢相信

Robin is going through with marrying...

罗宾要忍受嫁给...

the idea of getting a band.

请乐队这个想法

And that is, that's a perfectly normal way to phrase that.

这句话没有一点语法错误哦

Okay, Ted, bar. Now.

好吧泰德去酒吧马上走

Nice try.

想得美

You're gonna stick me with that baby

你就想把孩子丢给我

so that you guys can spend five minutes

然后去酒吧花五分钟

sorting out his love life,

解决他的爱情烦恼

followed by an hour of you getting drunk

接下来的一小时就是喝得醉醺醺

and pretending to be in The Departed.

大玩《无间道风云》的角色扮演

You know what? I'm sorry, Lily, okay?

好吧好吧我很抱歉莉莉

But I just need to know:

可我只想知道一件事

- Are you a cop? - I'm not a cop!

-你是警察吗 -我不是警察

- Are you a cop? - I'm not a cop!

-你是警察吗 -我不是警察

I got this.

我来处理这事

Ted, you, me, upstairs.

泰德你跟我上楼

Roof. Now.

去楼顶马上走

- What? It's January. - Move!

-哈现在一月寒冬 -快走

Let's cut the crap.

废话就不说了

We're both freezing--

我俩都冻得要死

just say it and we can go downstairs.

所以赶紧说完我们就可以下楼了

Say what?

说什么啊

Say how much you hate

说你有多不爽

that Robin and Barney are getting married.

罗宾要和巴尼结婚的事

What? No. I...

什么不我

I'm happy for them.

我为他们感到高兴啊

I-I encouraged Robin to go after Barney.

我还鼓励罗宾去追巴尼

I know-- because you thought you were okay letting her go.

我知道因为你以为自己可以放手

But now that she's really gone,

但现在她真的要嫁人了

it hurts.

你大受打击

Kids, at that point in my life,

孩子们在那个时候

I'd been hurt quite a few times already.

我的人生中已经受过不少次"打击"了

Today, we're gonna braid friendship bracelets.

今天我们要带上友情手链

*I fell in love...*

*我深深地爱上了*

There is a very simple explana... ah!

这件事其实很简单

This one time, I was playing tennis, and...

有一次我正在打网球

Hey, Schmosby, remember when you dookied

对了死尿斯比还记得那次你在

in your pants down by the lake?

湖边尿裤子的事吗

Unbelievable!

真不敢相信

Do you love me?

你爱我吗

No.

不爱

But when I saw that text message,

但当我看到那条短信

and found out Robin was engaged,

发现罗宾已经订婚时

巴尼·斯丁森罗宾和我订婚啦

it was like:

感觉就像

Unbelievable!

真不敢相信

No.

不爱

...times a million.

这些加起来再乘以一百万倍

I am happy for them.

我真心为他们高兴

Is all you'll let yourself say out loud,

你只敢让自己这样说

because if you said anything to the contrary, well,

因为只要你说了任何相反的话

that would make you

你就会变成

the most awful person on this rooftop.

这屋顶上最可怕的人

So, I'm gonna give you an out.

我打算让你一吐为快

And how are you gonna do that?

你打算怎么做

By saying something that is even more awful.

我会说出更可怕的话

Like what?

什么话

Sometimes I wish I wasn't a mom.

有时候我会希望自己不是一个母亲

Sometimes I want to pack a bag

有时候我想收拾好行李

and leave in the middle of the night and not come back.

半夜悄悄离开不再回来

Robin shouldn't be with Barney,

罗宾不应该嫁给巴尼

she should be with me.

她应该嫁给我

You serious?

你说真的吗

I don't know.

我不知道

I mean, I love being a mom, and...

我喜欢做母亲

I love Marvin so much.

我好爱好爱马文

But...

但是

but do you remember

你还记得

when I wanted to be an artist?

我想做艺术家的时候吗

Art was my whole life.

艺术是我的人生意义

And-and now it's been months

而现在我已经好几个月

since I've even picked up a brush.

没有拿起画笔了

I-I spend the whole day taking care of kids at my job,

我白天在幼儿园的工作就是照顾孩子

and I come home and it's more of the same.

然后回到家还是一样

It just...

只是

It never lets up, it...

从来没有休息的时候...

It's just really, really hard, Ted.

真的真的好累泰德

Have you talked to Marshall about how you feel?

你有跟马修讲过你的感受吗

Have you talked to Robin about how you feel?

你有跟罗宾讲过你的感受吗

Fair enough.

说得好

I just think we have to accept our lots in life,

我想我们都必须接受人生的缺憾

and I have to be a mom to a...

我必须做一位母亲

a beautiful, wonderful--

做一位漂亮可爱

if slightly constipated--

有点小便秘的

little boy, and...

小男孩的母亲

you have to let Robin and Barney get a band.

你必须让罗宾和巴尼在婚礼上请乐队

All right, let's see what's in this dipey.

好吧看看尿布里有什么

Nothing.

什么也没有

Absolutely nothing.

绝对是什么也没有

Are you finally giving Daddy a smile?

你终于肯对你老爸笑了吗

Oh, God!

上帝啊

And, no, it wasn't confetti.

不当时喷的可不是彩条

Oh! Oh, God!

上帝啊

Please!

求你了

Holy confetti.

好多的"彩条"啊

That night, Robin agreed

那天晚上罗宾同意

to meet her dad one more time.

再见她父亲一次

Your Dad has something to say.

你爸有话要说

I'm sorry for getting married without consulting you.

抱歉我没问你意见就结婚了

It was wrong of me.

这是我的错

There. Now, Robin...

好了罗宾

I know that no mere apology will fix this.

我知道只有道歉是不能解决问题的

And that is why

所以

I've asked Carol for a divorce.

我已经要求卡罗尔和我离婚

What?!

什么

She's heartbroken, understandably.

她的心都碎了可以理解

Possibly suicidal.

可能会自杀

I did not tell him...

我没有让他...

But if that's the price

但如果付出这样的代价

for my daughter's love...

才能得到我女儿的爱

then I will gladly let Carol pay it.

我很乐意这个代价让卡罗尔来付

Was that not what you wanted?

这不是你想要的吗

You want to know what I want?

你想知道我要什么吗

A normal dad. That's all.

一个普通的爸爸就是这样

I want you to give this blond guy

我要你同意这个金发男子

permission to marry me.

娶我为妻

Come to the wedding, give me away,

来参加我的婚礼将我交给他

smile in the pictures, and then...

笑着拍照然后...

dance with me like a normal dad.

像普通父亲一样和我跳舞

Is that too much to ask?

这个要求很过分吗

"Of course not.

当然不会

Oh, Robin, my darling girl,

罗宾我亲爱的女儿

of course I'll do all stuff.

我当然会这样做

I love you and I'm proud of you."

我爱你我为你感到骄傲

- He didn't say that? - No.

-他没这样说吧 -没

Fine. One dance--

好吧只跳一支舞

"Cheeseburger in Paradise."

舞曲是《天堂的芝士汉堡》

And Carol's going to sing it.

必须得由卡罗尔演唱

Well, see you at the wedding.

我们婚礼见

But it's kind of amazing.

但这是非常了不起的事

I mean, he's never apologized to me in his life.

他这辈子从没向我道过歉

Barney made it happen.

巴尼却让他这样做了

He must really love me.

他肯定是真的很爱我

Well, he'd be crazy not to.

傻子才会不爱你

I'm really happy for you guys.

我真的为你们高兴

But I still think you should get a DJ.

但我依然认为你们该请DJ

For God's sakes, Ted.

有完没完泰德

Hear me out.

听我说

I made a pretty strong case that night,

那晚我的理由强而有力

but in the end, she didn't want a DJ.

但最后她根本不想请DJ

She wanted a band.

她想要乐队

And guess what happened.

猜猜结果是什么

四个月后

That's right, the band cancelled at the last minute,

没错乐队在最终一刻放他们鸽子了

just like I said they would.

我早说过他们会这样做

The wedding is in a week, and no bands.

婚礼一周后举行却连乐队都没有

When will people realize I always know what's what?

大家何时才能意识到我从不会看走眼

He says to the lesbian he dated for a month.

那你之前跟女同约会过一个月怎么说

That's a fair point.

说得好

Anyway, you guys wouldn't, uh, happen to know

话说回来你们不会恰好知道

of any good wedding bands

有什么优秀的婚礼乐队

available at the last minute, would you?

可以临危受命吧

Ted, do you believe in destiny?

泰德你相信命运吗

You really don't know me, do you?

看来你真是不认识我啊

We just had brunch with my ex-roommate.

我们刚和我的前室友吃完早午餐

The bass player?

那个贝斯手吗

No, she's not just a bass player.

不她不仅仅是贝斯手

She's a bass player in the best wedding band

她是大纽约三州最优秀的

in the tri-state area.

婚礼乐队的贝斯手

They had a gig lined up for this weekend,

他们本来这周末有场演出

but it just fell through this morning.

但今早取消了

You, my friend, are gonna save that wedding.

我的朋友你将是婚礼的救世主

Do you know any DJs?

你们有认识什么DJ吗

Dude, come on.

哥们拜托

Let it go, bro. Just let it go.

别纠结了兄弟别纠结了

All right, all right, all right.

好的好的

Well, I guess, uh...

我想

Guess it's a lucky thing I ran into you guys.

碰到你们真是一件幸运的事

And, kids, "Lucky" doesn't even begin to describe it.

孩子们 "幸运"完全不足以形容我有多幸运

Because if Barney and Robin had taken my stupid advice

因为如果巴尼和罗宾听了我的白痴建议

and hired a DJ...

请了DJ

...I never would have met your mother.

我就永远不会碰到你们的母亲

老爸老妈的浪漫史 第八季 How I Met Your Mother Season 8 第13集: 乐队还是DJ Band or DJ

台词

老爸老妈的浪漫史第八季 How I Met Your Mother Season 8 第13集: 乐队还是DJ Band or DJ