燃情克利夫兰 第一季 Hot in Cleveland Season 1 第8集: The Play's the Thing
上映日期: 2,010
语言: 英语
影片类型: 喜剧
导演:
演员: 贝蒂·怀特 / 瓦莱丽·伯提内莉 / 简·丽芙丝 / 温蒂·马力克
台词
Hot in Cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience.
《燃情克利夫兰》是在摄影棚观众前现场录制
What are you doing? That's Crisco!
你在做什么 这是起酥油
I can't help it. I'm delirious from cosmetics depravation.
我也是没办法 没效果的护肤品已经快让我崩溃了
I rush-ordered some Indonesian rosewood oil last week,
上周加急邮购了印尼紫檀精油
and it still hasn't arrived.
可现在还没到
The Indonesian rosewood is endangered.
印尼紫檀正濒临灭绝
I know. That's why the box is labeled "Auto parts."
我知道 所以邮包上写着"汽车零件"
We're just going to a wine tasting.
只是去品酒会而已
It's not exactly a photo shoot for Vogue.
又不是为《时尚》拍硬照
Yeah, well, what if someone tips off the cleveland paparazzi?
万一有人给本地狗仔队爆料呢
You called three times. He's not coming.
你打过三次电话了 他不会去的
Oh, Elka, have you gone goth?
爱尔卡 你玩哥特风吗
I'm going to a funeral.
我去参加葬礼
Oh, I'm sorry.
抱歉
Who died?
谁去世了
I don't know.
不清楚
Some guy, I guess.
我想 某个老家伙吧
My friend Sheila crashes funerals to meet men.
我朋友希拉喜欢混进葬礼钓凯子
I'm going with.
我也去凑凑热闹
But you have Max.
可你已经有了迈克斯了
Just because I'm chained to the fence,
虽说我已经被套牢了
it doesn't mean I can't bark at the cars.
隔空抛几个媚眼不算有罪吧
Good morning!
早上好
Great morning!
早上非常好
What else do you want for breakfast?
早餐你俩还想吃什么
I really don't have much of an appetite this morning.
今天没什么胃口吃早餐
I don't either anymore.
我也不再有胃口了
Well, I better get out of here so you women can talk about me.
我还是识相点离开 你们姐妹可以拿我当话题
How cute is she?
看她多可爱
Oh, very.
太可爱了
How cute is he?
看他多可爱
Wait, wait, wait, I'll walk you out.
等等 我送你出去
That way, you can frisk me again.
这样 你可以再次搜我的身
Well, you are a "Person of interest."
你可是个"嫌疑人"[有兴趣]
Oh, I'll be so relieved when the bad pun stage is over.
等他们过了蹩脚双关语阶段 我会松一大口气
It could be worse.
这就算不错了
You know, we hardly ever see Melanie now that she's dating Pete.
他俩约会后 我们都难得见上梅兰妮一面
But I've heard everything.
可我都听见了
Everything.
所有动静
Well, I have some earplugs you can use.
我可以把耳塞借给你
I had to buy a box of them
我买了一整盒
because of that owl that keeps me up at night.
猫头鹰的叫声吵得我睡不着
That's not an owl, that's them!
不是猫头鹰 是他们
Good lord, she hoots like that?
我的天 她的叫床声是那样的吗
I think it's him. It's weird.
我觉得是他叫的 很诡异
Isn't Pete the best?
皮特是不是超棒的说
"Owl" say.
多猫几眼再说
What? What's so funny?
怎么了 什么这么好笑
It's nothing.
没什么
You better get dressed for our ohio wine tasting.
你赶紧换衣服 我们要去俄州品酒会了
Oh, no! I totally forgot about that.
糟糕 我完全忘了这事
You know, I promised Pete
我答应皮特
that I'd take him hiking this afternoon.
今天下午和他去远足
You're canceling on us again?
你又放我们鸽子
I'm sorry. I seem to be doing that a lot.
对不起 我知道自己最近总这样
But you guys can go without me.
可没我你们也能去啊
Oh, no, we'll just wait till next week.
不了 我们还是等下周吧
It's no fun without you.
你不去多没意思啊
After all, you're our designated driver.
毕竟 你可是指定的专职司机
Yes. I'm not gonna spit out perfectly free wine.
没错 我可不想把免费的极品红酒吐出来
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
对不起 对不起
But you and I are definitely on for our movie tonight, okay?
不过今晚我俩去看电影是说定了
But can you guys blame me? You understand, right?
这也不能怪我呀 你们能理解的 对吗
He's just so cute!
他真是太招人爱了
Outside, I stole a kiss
在外面时 我偷了个吻
and then he pretended to read me my miranda rights,
他便煞有介事地向我宣读米兰达权利
and then he said, "You have the right to remain adorable."
他说 "你有权保持可爱"
Hear that?
听见了吗
It's the sound of us all turning against you.
这是我们集体鄙视你的声音
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《燃情克利夫兰》第一季 第八集
Don't get up.
不用起来了
Where is she?
她在哪里
I beg your pardon?
你说什么
Oh, my god.
我的神啊
Ms. Chase.
蔡斯女士
My name is Zack Adams.
我是扎克·亚当斯
Like yourself, I am a devotee of the craft of thespis.
和您一样 我热爱希腊悲剧
Shocker.
骇人听闻
I am also a devotee of Honor st. Raven,
我也是欧娜·圣瑞雯的铁杆粉丝
Which is why I am pleased to give you this package
能将"印尼美丽汽配"的包裹交给您
from "Indonesian beauty auto supply."
我非常荣幸
Oh, my rosewood oil!
我的紫檀精油
- How did you get this? - The mailman brought it.
-怎么在你手上 -邮差送来的
I live at the same house number, two blocks over.
我家离这儿两条街 门牌号一样
And it's almost as if the hand of god was at work,
这简直就是上帝之手的安排
Only it wasn't god because the mailman does this all the time,
可惜不是 邮差总是送错
And I think he smokes weed.
我觉得他抽大麻抽傻了
Well, thank you, zack.
谢谢你 扎克
It's always so nice to meet such an enthusiastic fan.
真高兴能见到你这么热情的粉丝
Honor st. Raven taught me courage, determination, love...
欧娜·圣瑞雯教会我勇气 决心 爱情
Even how to survive a blizzard by crawling inside a bear carcass.
甚至教会我钻进熊的尸体 在暴风雪中生存下来
"I never wear fur, but this is an emergency!"
我从未穿过皮衣 不过这是非常时期
That was during the writers' strike, wasn't it?
那是编剧罢工期间拍的吧
Ah! The best six months of my life.
对 我这辈子最爽的半年
Actually, Ms. Chase,
蔡斯女士 其实
I too am in a blizzard of sorts,
我也身处所谓的暴风雪中
and I need you to be my bear carcass.
我需要您做我的熊尸
I'm intrigued.
胃口被你吊起来了
We're in rehearsal for our school play
我们正排练校园戏剧
and I desperately need you to help us not make it suck.
迫切需要您的指导才不会演砸
Even a word from you
您的只字片语
would be as rejuvenating as the Indonesian rosewood oil--
也能如印尼紫檀般 化腐朽为神奇
Which, I might add, you hardly need.
我得说一句 您根本用不着这个
Look, I'm flattered,
听我说 我非常荣幸
but I'm not really a school play sort of person.
可校园戏剧不太适合我
But you have to!
必须适合
We're doing Romeo and Juliet, which I know is the first thing
我们将演出《罗密欧与朱丽叶》 我知道
you ever acted in in high school.
这是您的高中处女作
- Well, that is true. - And our production is doomed.
-没错 -我们的演出注定悲剧
Because the soccer coach is now doubling as the drama teacher
因为学校没钱 足球教练现在兼职
due of budget cuts.
戏剧指导
God, I hate jocks.
我讨厌运动男
You were married to a wide receiver.
你有一任老公就是接球手
I still don't know what sport that was.
我现在还没弄清楚接的是什么球
Please come.
求您一定要去
The man wants to put the character names
那家伙想把角色名字
on the back of our costumes.
印在戏服后面
What kind of monster is he?
真是十恶不赦的妖孽
Zack, I will be your carcass.
扎克 我愿意做你的熊尸
All acting is an art,
表演皆艺术
whether some great work on broadway
无论是百老汇的惊世之作
or a production of Romeo and Juliet
还是在你们学校小礼堂
right here in your little school cafetorium.
上演的《罗密欧与朱丽叶》
For why else would Victoria Chase
为什么维多利亚·蔡斯
be standing here before you on this humble stage?
会纡尊降贵来到这简陋的舞台
Because, believe it or not,
只因 无论你们相信与否
I was once where you are.
我也如你们一般演技青涩过
I were be taller and with better skin.
不过高挑些 皮肤细嫩些
So dig deep and strive hard to be a true artist.
所以要发掘潜力 努力成为真正的艺术家
Because that is when the awards come a'calling.
到那时 你便会功成名就
And you had better be ready because they are awesome.
做好准备哦 功成名就的感觉爽极了
- Inspiring stuff. - Ah, thank you.
-的确是鼓舞士气 -谢谢
Campbell, I see you smirk like that again,
坎贝尔 再给我这样傻笑
I'll knock your block off.
我就赏你一个大暴栗
Okay, bring it in and take a knee.
集合 单膝跪下
Listen up.
听好了
We got our first show on Friday,
周五就是首场演出
and your parents aren't paying
你们爹妈花钱可不是
to see a bunch of amateur ragtime grab-ass up here.
为了看一帮半吊子二货耍花枪
So let's execute!
咱得好好演
Hands in, "Shakespeare" on three.
手放一起 数到三喊"莎翁万岁"
Everybody, know your lines and be awesome.
每个人 牢记台词兼震翻全场
- One, two, three. - Shakespeare!
-一二三 -莎翁万岁
I see what you're dealing with here.
我知道你有多惨了
Shh! Don't let him catch you talking to me.
嘘 别让他发现你跟我说话
He'll make me do push-ups.
他会罚我做俯卧撑的
Boy push-ups.
男生的俯卧撑
Excuse me, is this seat taken?
打扰下 这里有人坐吗
Sorry, I'm waiting for my friend.
抱歉 帮朋友留的
No problem.
没事儿
Is this seat taken?
这里有人坐吗
- So that guy's the bachelor? - For this season.
-他就是单身汉吗 -只是这一季的[真人秀]
Looks like a guy you want to punch.
一脸欠揍样
Shh! They're about to start the rose ceremony.
安静 玫瑰仪式要开始了
Do the women know he's gay?
这些女人知道他是"同志"吗
Oh, big surprise. He chose the one with the biggest breasts.
好"意外"哦 他选了胸器最大的那个
And she's a paralegal.
她是个律师助理
And they made a beautiful connection
他和另外两个女人约会的那晚
that night he dated those two other women.
这女人和他很来电
Oh, yeah. Told them both they were the one.
是哦 他分别对那两个说"你是唯一"
You know what? You're worse than watching this with Joy.
知道吗 你这个陪看观众 比乔依还差劲
Oh, my god, Joy!
妈呀 乔依
I was supposed to meet her at the movies!
我们约好看电影的
Excuse me,
打扰下
it appears my friend isn't coming after all.
看来我朋友不会来了
Thanks, I'm good.
谢谢 坐这里挺好的
Coming soon...
即将上映
They were as close as sisters,
她们亲如姐妹
until the summer that would change everything.
直到改变一切的夏天来临
If you don't have friends, you have nothing.
如果你没有朋友 你便一无所有
Nothing!
一无所有
My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand
这两片嘴唇 含羞的信徒
to smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.
愿意用一吻乞求你宥恕
Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much
信徒 莫把你的手儿侮辱
which mannerly devotion shows in this--
这样才是最虔诚的礼敬
Barker, you're out of position again.
巴克 你又站错位了
Drop and gimme 20.
来20个俯卧撑
This is a waking nightmare.
这是活生生的恶梦
Well, everyone's just too scared to act.
大家都怕得没法演了
Except you, Zack. You are Mercutio.
除了你 扎克 你就是茂丘西奥
This is my friend, Gina.
这是我朋友 吉娜
My girlfriend, gina.
我的女朋友 吉娜
Really. Well, nice to meet you, Gina.
是嘛 很高兴认识你 吉娜
And are you an actor also?
你也是演员吗
Oh, hair and makeup.
发型兼化妆师
I keep telling her I should have a beard.
我一直跟她说帮我加个胡子
Oh, I wouldn't bother.
加不加都一样
All right, guys, pick up the pace.
好了 各位 加快速度
We need to motor through the boring parts.
无聊的戏份赶紧过
Actually, coach, I know a couple of acting exercises
教练 我知道一些演技训练技巧
I think might loosen everyone up.
可以让大家放松下
These kids don't need loosening up.
这些小家伙不需要放松
They need a swift kick in the ass.
他们需要把皮好好紧紧
You know, I have worked with tyrannical directors like you.
我与你这样专制的导演合作过
It's not helpful.
不会出效果的
Performance is a collaboration.
表演是团队协作
Lady, I'm just trying to get to the sword fight.
女士 我只想快点到比剑的戏
Romeo and Juliet is not about a sword fight.
《罗密欧与朱丽叶》可不是讲什么比剑的
Well, if it was,
如果是的
maybe more people would have heard of it.
可能会有更多人知道有这么个东西
You are a terrible director,
你是个差劲的导演
And I know a thing or two about directing.
我可是知道一两点导演技巧
I took a class called "A thing or two about directing."
我上过"一两点导演技巧"的课
Fine, if you think you can do better, go for it.
好吧 如果你觉得你更牛逼你就上
Just don't dehydrate them. We've had lawsuits.
别让他们脱水就行 咱们吃过官司
No, but you d--
不 你就...
What's all that?
这是什么
Oh, I told Melanie I'd do her brows.
我答应梅兰妮帮她修眉
I'm surprised you're even speaking to her,
她那样对你 你居然
the way she's been treating you.
还跟她说话
Oh, it's okay.
没什么啦
So she stood me up a few times.
她放了我几次鸽子
She has a new boyfriend. I get it.
人家新交了男朋友 我理解的
That's no excuse.
这可不是借口
In Poland, the nuns had a saying,
在波兰 修女有句话
It means, "Chicks before..."
意思是 重闺蜜轻...
[Chicks before dicks 重闺蜜轻小弟]
You know what.
你知道的
The nuns said that?
这是修女说的
[女主为志愿修女 后嫁给男主]
It was no Sound of Music.
那阵儿还没流行《音乐之声》
Right.
是啊
Thanks again for doing this.
再次谢谢你
And again, I'm so sorry about last night.
昨晚的事 也再次向你道歉
Stop apologizing. It's all forgotten.
别再道歉了 都忘了
I just lost track of time.
我没了时间概念
Whenever I'm with Pete, I just--
只要和皮特在一起
I forget about everything else.
我就忘了一切
Oh, did I tell you,
我有没有跟你说
this morning, he said the cutest thing.
今天早上 他说了句好有爱的话
Oh, my bad.
不好意思
Raw cookie dough?
冷冻曲奇饼
Did you finally get that Peruvian tapeworm you ordered?
你邮购的秘鲁绦虫终于到啦[减肥用]
No. The mule got caught at customs again.
没有 走私的又被海关抓了
Look, it's opening night, and I need this.
今晚是首演 我需要能量
I thought everything was going great. What's the problem?
不是进展顺利吗 出什么问题了
The problem is Juliet.
朱丽叶就是问题
She's a lox.
跟死鱼似的
When she dies at the end, no one can tell,
最后她死的时候 都没人看出来
because she's been so lifeless all along.
因为她整出戏都是副死人样
Doesn't she have an understudy?
不是有候补吗
Ah, yes, Theresa. Remind me to send her flowers.
没错 特里莎 提醒我给她送花
She had her baby this afternoon.
今天下午她做妈妈了
God, what am I gonna do?
老天 我该怎么办
Maybe your actress is just scared.
可能她只是太害怕了
Weren't you scared when you started?
你刚起步时难道不害怕吗
Of what? Too much adulation?
怕什么 奉承话太多?
Okay, clearly it's hard for you to relate to the untalented,
很明显 你没法理解没有天赋的人
but imagine, just for a second,
可是想象下 瞬间想象也好
what it would be like if you were one of them.
你也跟他们一样会如何
Inspiration has struck. I know just what to say to her.
有灵感了 我知道怎么教育她了
Oh, Victoria Chase's Romeo and Juliet
维多利亚·蔡斯的《罗密欧与朱丽叶》
is going to be a triumph!
将会取得巨大成功
Isn't it William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet?
应该是莎翁的《罗密欧与朱丽叶》吧
Uh, well, I tweaked a few lines,
我改了些台词
so Will and I are gonna share credit on the program.
莎老头将和我共享殊荣
- The wax is hot. Ready? - Yeah, yeah.
-脱毛蜡很烫 准备好了吗 -好了
Can you give me a little bit of a higher arch this time?
这次眉弯能高点吗
Because I'm meeting Pete's friends for dinner tomorrow night,
明晚要和皮特的朋友们吃晚饭
and I want them to think I'm pretty.
我希望他们觉得我是美女
Well, you know, and smart and stuff.
还有聪明啊什么的
- Tomorrow night? - Yeah.
-明晚吗 -是的
Oh, Joy! Oh, no!
乔依 完蛋了
Little Italy, you and me, dinner.
我们约好在"小小意大利"吃饭的
Oh, I'm so sorry.
真是对不起
Listen, I would cancel, but it's Pete's friends,
取消也行 可这是皮特的朋友
and you know how important friends are.
你也知道朋友有多重要
Yes, if you don't have friends, you have nothing.
是的 如果你没有朋友 你便一无所有
Nothing.
一无所有
Ooh, boy.
妈呀
What? What did you do?
怎么了 你做了什么
Where's my eyebrow?
我的眉毛呢
It's right here.
在这里
And exhale.
呼气
Now, places.
现在 站位吧
Where is my Juliet?
我的朱丽叶在哪里
Yeah, Ms. Chase?
什么事 蔡斯女士
How are you feeling, Francesca?
感觉如何 弗兰西斯卡
Like I want to puke.
我想吐
- Ah, that's good. - That's good?
-很好 -很好吗
Yes, yes. That means you're afraid.
是的 这表示你很害怕
Now, do you know what you're afraid of?
你知道自己害怕什么吗
You?
你?
No, realizing your dream.
不 你认清了自己的梦想
Because in that dream is the truth about yourself.
在这个梦想里 是真实的你
Now, I want you to close your eyes
现在你闭上眼睛
and visualize it.
幻想一下
Can you see it, Francesca?
看到了吗 弗兰西斯卡
I think so.
可能吧
Yeah, I see it.
我看到了
You are confident, talented, owning the stage.
你自信满满 才华横溢 独霸舞台
Every line a triumph, every gesture a revelation.
句句台词振人心 举手投足撩人情
You are a young--well, younger-- Victoria Chase.
你是小维多... 年轻版的维多利亚·蔡斯
You are me.
你就是我
But I don't want to be you.
可我不想成为你
What?
什么
- No, that's not my dream. - But Francesca--
-不 这不是我的梦想 -可是弗兰西斯卡
Look, I'm sorry, Ms. Chase, but we both know
抱歉蔡斯女士 可我们都知道
this play's gonna be way better without me.
没我这戏更精彩
Oh, boy.
妈呀
Oh, my gosh.
我的天啊
Thank you, Miss Chase.
谢谢你 蔡斯女士
I see the truth about myself, too!
我也认清了真实的自己
And I just want to shout it out loud!
我想大声地喊出来
Not until after prom, you don't.
毕业舞会后才准喊
Now who's gonna play Juliet?
现在谁来演朱丽叶
Finally, it's Zack's turn.
终于 扎克的机会到了
I know all of her lines, and besides,
她所有的台词我都记得 而且
it's my wig anyway.
这假发本来就是我的
I think there are three empty seats over there.
那边有三个空座位
I'm not blind, just disfigured.
我没瞎 只是毁容了
Accidents happen.
意外总是有的
Yeah, accidents happen.
是啊 "意外"会发生
A wise man once said, "There are no accidents."
一位智者曾说过 万事皆无意外
That was Freud.
这是弗洛伊德说的
I didn't get his name.
我不知道名字
It was just some old guy I spilled my soda on.
反正是个老头 我把汽水泼他身上了
Sorry.
对不起
Oh, now you apologize.
现在你知道道歉了
I was talking to them, not to you.
我是跟他们说 不是你
Sorry.
对不起
Still them.
还是他们
Look, even if I did do it on purpose,
就算我是有意的
on some deep, subconscious level, I must have had a good reason.
可在深层的潜意识里 我肯定有合理的原因
- So you admit it! - I admit nothing.
-你承认是故意的 -我什么都没承认
Well, are you just secretly upset that I have a boyfriend?
我有了男朋友 你就私底下生气了吗
- Of course not. - Then what's the big deal?
-当然不是了 -那你到底有什么不爽
She's upset that you've been ditching your friends
她生气是因为你有了男人
just because there's a new guy in your life.
就把朋友抛一边了
It's as obvious as that hickey on your neck.
这事和你脖子上的吻痕一样明显
She's right.
她说的对
Aren't we past the days when a guy comes into your life
我们这年纪 不应该再是异性当前
and suddenly you become oblivious to everyone else?
就犯花痴当身边的人都不存在了
You're right. I have been acting a little bit like a teenager.
你说的对 我是表现得有点像初恋少女
But in my defense, the last time I had a boyfriend,
可容我说一句 上次我交男朋友时
I was a teenager.
的确是初恋少女
I'm really sorry that we've been in your face.
真是对不起 没有顾及你的感受
And I'm sorry I took off part of yours.
我也抱歉没顾及你眉毛的感受
So far, I hate it.
到现在为止 我讨厌这出戏
O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do,
那么我要祷求你的允许
they pray; grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.
让手的工作交给了嘴唇
Saints do not move, though grant for prayer's sake.
你的祷告已蒙神明允准
Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take.
神明 请容我把殊恩受领
It's funny 'cause it's gross.
因为恶心 所以好看
Honey, that was so great!
亲爱的 演出太成功了
Best Romeo and Juliet I've ever seen.
我看过的最棒的《罗密欧与朱丽叶》
Oh, yeah, a lot of laughs.
笑声不断啊
Oh, thank you.
谢谢
Kelly Mushlin proclaimed it a "Smash hit."
凯利·马希林评论为"卖座大戏"
- Who? - A tenth grader. She writes for the school paper.
-谁 -十年级学生 校报记者
Wow, you seem so happy.
你好开心哦
Well, I'm just so excited to be back
能重返正统戏剧舞台
in the legitimate theater again.
我太高兴了
Um, I have an announcement to make.
我有事情要宣布
Uh, the school asked if I would stay on
学校问我是否愿意留下
as the drama advisor, and I said yes.
担任戏剧顾问 我同意了
Are you serious? That's wonderful!
真的吗 太好了
I think that might actually be quite
我觉得这真是
fantastic.
棒极了
What about your career?
那你的演艺事业呢
Oh, if get offered a part, I am on the next plane out of here.
如果接到角色 我会立马坐飞机走人
[六七十年代影坛风云人物 近年曾出演蝙蝠侠中的老管家]
You know, in acting, we call that Michael Caine's law.
在演艺圈 这叫迈克尔·凯恩法则
Oh. Oh, it's Pete.
是皮特发的
He wants me to come meet him.
他要我过去
But I'm telling him no.
不过我会拒绝他
I'm spending the evening with my girlfriends.
我要陪闺蜜度过美好的夜晚
Because nothing in life is as important as friendship.
因为人生最重要的莫过于友谊
Or is it also because you look like a hideous freak
恐怕也是因为你现在是个吓死人的
without your eyebrow?
单眉妖怪吧
Yeah, there's that too.
是 也有这个原因